#chronic emptiness

[amenbpdtism]

Autibordervoid(gender)+Flag

Autibordervoid, based on my bordervoidgender, a gender identity where you feel like your gender is connected to a void or is voided due to struggles that can come with BPD and autism, especially when you have both, such as chronic emptiness and alexithymia. In order is the autibordervoid flag, autibordervoid flag with the autism symbol, autibordervoid flag with the BPD symbol, autibordervoid flag with the neurodivergent symbol.

Meanings:

Top stripe/lighter green is for co-occuring autism and BPD as well as the unique struggles that come with it.

Darker green is for Autism/being autistic.

Third stripe/greenish gray is for Alexithymia aka reduced capability to recognize your own emotions which can lead to feeling empty or numb

Black stripe is for a gender identity connected to the void or voided gender

5th stripe/purple-ish gray is for chronic emptiness symptom of BPD

Darker purple is for Borderline personality disorder.

Bottom stripe/lighter purple is for neurodivergency

[4ngel-f4ngzz]

thought the void in my chest was finally full. turns out i was wrong and i am still chronically empty.

i have fed you so much, what do you crave but refuse to speak?

[l0tt1ee]

Me even though I’m aroace

[pyrosex]

I NEED A NEW BLORBO I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE

I WANT TO ROTATE A CHARACTER IN MY BRAIN LIKE A MICROWAVE

I WANT A CHARACTER TO PUT IN MY MOUTH AND CHEW

I CANT FIND ONE

[perfectlyunknownn]

when will the friendship gods allow me to have a stable friendship

[clinicallyvamp]

Lately i have been feeling like half a human? hollow? soulless? Like i changed and lost some fendamental parts of how i used to be? I feel lacking in a sense, i feel so lacking to the point that it started to feel like not just an identity issue but an issue that is making me feel like i lack things to be a full human being like i used to be and feel, let alone be myself.

[pattytacuri]

rejuvenation

I’m looking for someone to rejuvenate my heart

a couple have tried and I’ve smiled and I’ve nodded

but absolutely nothing is felt

I take off my clothes for them

allow them to touch me 

Stare at me in awe

Tell me I’m the most beautiful woman in the world

But not one ounce of feeling is felt in me

maybe they’re the wrong ones for me

or maybe my heart still isn’t healed

3/15/2022

[amenbpdtism]

BORDERVOIDGENDER + FLAG

A xenogender where your gender feels connected to a void or like a void due to the chronic emptiness that often comes with borderline personality disorder.

[kinlodok]

El fog múlni a fájdalom ígérem...csak adj időt magadnak

Nem értek ezzel egyet. Mitől múlva el a személyiségzavarom? A PTSD-m? Az acting outos személyiségem? A dühkezelési problémáim? Mikor tűnik el a fidesz az életből? Mikor lesznek jogaim? Mikor születhetek újjá (ciszként...)? Soha. Soha nem lesznek ebben az országban jogaim, soha nem élhetek nyugodt életet. Mikor mehetek vissza az időben augusztus elejére, és adhatok magamnak egy hatalmas állast? Soha. Soha, de soha nem fogok felépülni ebből az évből. Már az alkohol sem segít, sokszor arra gondolok, hogy veszek valami bzd-t a haveromtól... (Nem kéne)

[ashen-phoenix]

Waiting very patiently for the next time somebody tells me I'm in control of my life and need to stop blaming other people for my problems. I've been very tired and I think I deserve to tell somebody to shove it as a treat.

I think I'm craving catharsis and that would get me through for a day or two. I don't want to cry anymore. I don't like crying. I'm very tired and my eyes hurt. I might be angry? I can't place what this feeling is. It might just be The Void wanting filled but I have nothing to fill it with, healthy or otherwise, and the emptiness is morphing into frustration.

Might go out into the woods and shriek like a Banshee until I start to see lights come on at the neighbors. They can be awake too. I don't like them anyway, their vibes are off and I just know something bad is going to happen, they fill me with utter dread every time I see them and I can't place why. I want them to leave.

[theresgoingtobeaflood]

and I'm starting to wonder, is hollow ʇuoɹɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐ the better choice? do I let empty win? somebody tell me how to keep the void tf away from me aaaa cluster b w dissociative disorders y'all know what I'm talking ab?

... send help.

[michiquette]

i feel so dead inside today. there's literally nothing going on. i'm just gonna hope tomorrow i don't feel like this because wow this is such a waste of time. like, it's the weekend and i could be doing something fun or productive or good, but i'm just completely on pause like my brain isn't functioning.

i think i'll make a coffee later for me but even that seems like pointless. i just wanna feel like i enjoy something, but it's so exhausting. and nothing seems enjoyable enough to try it. i'm sure if i have coffee i would probably like it, but would i like it enough to get off my chair and go make it? no.

nothing is worth it. nothing.

this is what emptiness by itself feels like. no anxiety, just plain ol' emptiness.

[pattytacuri]

rejuvenation

I’m looking for someone to rejuvenate my heart

a couple have tried and I’ve smiled and I’ve nodded

but absolutely nothing is felt

I take off my clothes for them

allow them to touch me 

Stare at me in awe

Tell me I’m the most beautiful woman in the world

But not one ounce of feeling is felt in me

maybe they’re the wrong ones for me

or maybe my heart still isn’t healed

3/15/2022

[max-nico]

The real reason Jason doesn't allow Bruce in crime alley is because he keeps trying to take street kids home. There are mixed reactions, but most of the time it ends with Red Hood having to rescue a feral kid from Batman's huge arms.

Jason keeps telling him that the street kids don't want to go to his fancy ass mansion for various reasons, but it's also terrifying being picked up by a 6'3 brick shit house of a man who is known to regularly cripple people. Double scary because he is dressed as a giant fucking bat.

Bruce is like "But it worked with you :((" and Jason just goes "yeah, going home with you was the stupidest decision I've ever made."

[thepeacefulgarden]

[macabrevampire]

what they don't tell you about giving in to self-destruction is that it doesn't ever provide the relief you want it to