#incorrect pandora lovegood

[doorlene]

regulus, trying to be helpful: maybe if you just put pen to paper?

pandora: i tried that. i thought, "i'll just sit down and write whatever comes. no judgment, no inner critic". merlin, was that a bad idea.

regulus: really? why?

pandora: because my brain is a wild jungle full of scary gibberish: "i'm writing a letter i can't write a letter why can't i write a letter i'm wearing a green dress i wish i was wearing my blue dress my blue dress is with the house elves the aurors wore grey you wore blue 'casablanca' 'casablanca' is such a good movie 'casablanca' the ministry dumbledore why don't i ride a broom i should ride a broom i should really take my bicycle to school bicycle unicycle unitard hockey puck rattlesnake monkey monkey underpants".

regulus:

[nyxstherapy]

*texting*

james: HI regulus: hey james: HOW ARE YOU regulus: good, but why are you texting in capital? james: YOU SAID THAT YOU HATE SMALL TALK SO I MADE IT BIG JUST FOR YOU james: REG? james: LOVE james: WHY AREN'T YOU REPLYING regulus: james, this is pandora, reg is currently crying, i think you broke him

[vomits0cutely]

Harry: i grew up with a lesbian mother and a bisexual father, both of which have a wife and husband so I didn’t know straight people existed until I was like 6

Ron: [is confused on who has a wife and who has a husband] Hold up, I’m confused say that again but slow

Pansy: that’s the life every child deserves.

[incorrect-maraudersaandco-quotes]

Lily/Pandora/Sybill/Regulus: You deserve an award for putting up with me. Mary/Xeno/Peter/James: You are my reward. ~~~~ Barty/Marlene/Sirius: You deserve an award for putting up with me. Evan/Dorcas/Remus: Yeah. You can be a real bitch sometimes.

[daddiesdrarryy]

Pandora: How have you been, Reg?

Regulus: Well, I’m under stress, I’m under pressure!

Regulus: The only thing I’m NOT under is James Potter

Regulus: Which is a bloody shame honestly

[not-rab]

Barty: Why do you look like that?

Regulus: Like what

Barty: Like you’re dead

Regulus: It’s because I’m dying, leave me here to perish

Pandora: Regulus accidentally called Potter “James” in front of everyone today

Regulus: *sobs on the floor*

[theprongspotter]

Pandora, looking at James: Who’s that?

Regulus: That’s my… someone.

Pandora: Your someone?

Regulus: Just someone.

Pandora: Your special someone?

-

c: @humdrummoloch

[urfavsherlockholmeskinnie]

Regulus: Due to personal reasons, I will be fucking sinking to the bottom of the ocean in a large metal box.

Pandora : Did James say 'I love you' and you said 'Thanks'?

Regulus: THE REASONS ARE PERSONAL–

[you-cant-be-sirius]

Pandora: Alright Evan, Dorcas. Let's go over this one more time.

Pandora: If something breaks?

Evan: We try to fix it before Regulus gets back.

Pandora: If it doesn't work?

Dorcas: We blame Barty.

Barty: What the fuck?!

[reggieblackdiary]

That marauders fanfic of Jily’s son written by JKRowling is cray cray, why does everyone keep dying ????

[thatfanficbihch]

Evan: Lily, if we got married I would be Evan Evans.

Lily: and if we got married me and Pandora would be sister-in-laws!

Remus to Regulus: if I married Sirius, and you married James, what would that make us?

*cuts to James and Sirius arguing over if Freddie Mercury or David Bowie would win in a fight*

Regulus to Remus: if you married Sirius and I married James that would make us idiots.

[i-need-of-a-hobby]

dorcas: i need advice on how to flirt with marlene, which of you likes girls? barty: *sitting in evan's lap* evan: *playing with barty's hair* regulus: *complaining to barty about james* pandora: *writing xe a love letter* dorcas: ... dorcas: well i'm fucked

[missesmckinnon]

Dumbledore: It has come to my attention that inappropriate actions took place at a party a few nights ago.

The Great Hall: *intense flashbacks to the party four nights ago, where Remus sold joints to everyone, Lily drank half a bottle of vodka and could still walk straight, Mary danced until she somehow lost all her clothes, Marlene and Dorcas glared and growled at each other the entire party until they disappeared upstairs, James kissed Regulus in front of everyone and they also disappeared upstairs, Snape called Regulus a slur so Barty blew Evan in the middle of the room, Sirius ripped his shirt and his pants to leave him irresistibly exposed, Peter and Amelia sat in the corner playing chess and only got tipsy, Edgar and Emmeline started a game of strip-poker which left everyone in their underwear and a few people naked, and Pandora and Xenophilius stayed sober the whole time, took photos of everyone, and made sure everyone got to bed safely*

Dumbledore: Does anyone know anything about this?

The Great Hall, in perfect unison: No.

[nyxstherapy]

regulus: im going to need a human skull but you cant ask why pandora: pandora: okay, here you go. but dont ask why *pulls three human skulls out of her bag pandora: choose one regulus: pandora: regulus: this one will do

[that-bitch-kat3]

pandora: how are you?

regulus: i’m literally going insane. thanks for your concern

[daddiesdrarryy]

Remus: Are you going to dress up as Santa for Harry’s first Christmas?

James: I will! I’m gonna teach him all about Christmas!

Pandora: Oh! And maybe I could teach Harry about the Christmas skull and how people die!

Regulus: Maybe you need to use this year to teach Harry about Pandora.