#lazy headcanons

[sanjisboyfie]

keep safe mc headcanons im sleepy

-> covers the corners of tables when you duck your head under them ALL THE TIME without fail, his hand is there. and he doesnt even seem to notice he does that?? hes talking to someone, noticed your picking something you dropped under the table, quickly moves his hand, and stull maintains perfect conversation

-> an advid grey sweatpants wearer probably paired sleeveless tanks as well, only cuz hed be most comfortavle in them snd thats rlly it. he doesnt get the whole appeal behind it, or rather he just isnt aware abt the entire thing. he judt wears it cuz theyre comfy for him and his inhumanely gargantuam, thick, girthy, massive dick

-> does calisthenics to work out along w a lot of cardio. his figure is ... hehe

-> complains a lot abt luffy being a clingy sleeper but hes the exact same way. if u slept in the same bed as him, but not like cuddling/near each other, when u wake up he will be big spooning you and snoring on top of you. its actually a disease he had where he has to hug or cuddle whatever is closest to him and genuienly goodnluck in trying to escape this fuckign massine unit of a man.

-> oh my god thought abt this one jus now. but i mentioned before hes a chronic manspreaded. yeah its terrible. genuinely terrible to sit next to him anywhere. the dining table/restaurant, in public anywhere idk, anywhere u would need to dit next to him -- its a pain. he doesnt know he doed it and its so fucking annoying. bc if u correct him or ask he just fixes himself he will and then he'll apologize but then he'll go back to manspreadung line ten mins later. (if you tell him it rlly bothers u he offers you his thigh to sit on, with a light tap to his MEATY AND MUSCULAR legs and a soft "cmere"- someone cage ne im going insane for a man that isnt even canonically or literally real)

[turtleblogatlast]

Leo learns something about himself 🏳️‍⚧️

Based roughly on this old post.

Bonus:

[Leo is taking the fact that he was born biologically female simultaneously very well and also not so well but overall he’s mostly coping with the fact that it was Draxum that just essentially gave him the turtle equivalent of ‘The Talk’.]

[mybuginette]

i'm obsessed with this shit now

sorry, in universe social media is my roman empire now

[moongreenlight]

Ex Husband!Price who still comes over and shovels your driveway every time it snows. But then you feel bad because he comes into the mud room every fifteen minutes to warm up so when he’s done you insist he stays for a hot meal.

But then he helps clean up. Does the dishes and shoos you away when you tell him he really doesn’t need to do all that.

Even worse if you have kids!! They’re thrilled that dad is around so they beg you to let him stay to watch a movie or play a few rounds of their video game. Of course you say yes. Who are you to take him away from the kids?

But then it’s late and he’s wound up carrying the kids up to their beds and tucking them in because they’d already fallen asleep on the couch. You say your goodbyes and honestly it’s a little bittersweet because it’s been such a surprisingly good evening.

But when he tries to leave the driveway’s already gotten all snowy again and you’d hate to be worrying about him driving home in these conditions so you offer him a spot on the couch swearing it’s only for tonight.

But then you get to talking about schedules and the kids sports they’re signing up to play and he winds up walking you to your room so you can just finish your thought about how the two of you should split the costs for the sports your kids are doing in the spring.

But once you’re in your bedroom you remember that you’ve been meaning to ask him about something on your computer so you leave him with your laptop while you get changed.

But then oh noooo he comes into the closet to ask you for a password and catches you pulling on the top of your pajamas. You’re mortified. He says it’s nothing he hasn’t seen before.

Somewhere in between deciding if you’ll drive to or pick up from practice on Thursdays, his hands start to wander. Resting over your sex from over a pair of flannel pajama pants. Usually, you’d tell him off. Monologue about how this isn’t how things work because it complicated things and you both need to set boundaries. But tonight you don’t.

Maybe it’s because you had two heavy-handed pours of your favorite wine with dinner. Maybe it was seeing him with your kids again. Maybe it had just been too long since you’d felt anything other than a cheap bullet vibrator.

So you let him slip his hand down your pants.

But it’s a bit jarring to feel his wedding band still on his finger.

[vampireyuuta]

includes: gn! reader, aged up! boys, i dont know what to put here u get the point

what are the boys packing?

MEGUMI — perrrrrrrfect like the rest of him

6.50 inches, reasonable girth, uncircumcised, curve to the right, pretty pink tip, one big fat vein running on the underside of it. it's very nice. like i said, it's perfect. he fits so snugly inside you, reaching the most head-spinning spot inside you. you don't need two hands to give him a handy, but you definitely struggle to take him in your mouth. his tip is super super sensitive also. he blushes every time you ogle it like it's the most beautiful thing ever, but he stops caring when you absolutely worship his perfect cock.

TOGE — short boy, short dick

4.75 inches, on the thinner side, circumcised, oh so subtle curve to the left, light salmon pink tip, veerrry veiny (like big fat veins that he NEEDS you to lick). it's cute! it fits! to his credit, he is great with it and it fits just right in your pretty mouth. not too much, not too little. he makes up for his lack in size with his tongue and hands, don't worry. he’s a little embarrassed about it being too small, but, of course, you reassure him. though he wouldn't mind if you made fun of his size a little.

YUUJI — a great size <3

5.50 inches, really fat, circumcised, no noticeable curve, tip is really pink (especially when you tease him for hours), also extremely vieny but they're less prominent than toge’s. the length is perfect and cozy tight inside you, but his girth stretches you out until you're seeing nothing but stars. same with your mouth—it is a challange to stuff all that thickness in your throat. he leaks like a lot. a gust of wind will have this bitch leaking pre like a waterfall. his balls, too, are super fat. please play with his balls!!!

YUUTA — wtf? freakishly huge??

8.25 inches, super duper girthy, uncircumcised, curves to the right, the most beautiful pastel pink tip, a few cutesy veins. like many before me, i declare that huge massive dick yuuta is canon. it's scary, terrifying even. he’s muscular—can't be the second strongest without being musclar—but he’s still pretty lean and lanky, but he has such a long, fat dick that it is insanely jarring. a shower, for sure, but that's okay. he’s so humble about it; “is it really that big?” he blushes when you're gawking and rambling about how there's no way it’ll fit your first time with him. spoiler alert, it does not fit. it stretches you out and splits you open like nothing else ever could. he feels so guilty about it, yet it always makes you cum so hard you almost pass out so he feels a little better!

[poisonousliliy]

So, when will we see that weapon again btw

[unicornpopcorn14]

Chuuya's reaction to Dazai getting hurt during the Lovecraft fight has always been so interesting to me...

Because it's the kind of worry you'd never expect from a character as gruff as Chuuya, who had displayed nothing but hostility towards Dazai so far. Usually, characters that are labelled as "angry" or "anger issues" (which Chuuya is much more complex than that but you get my point) act more as a tsundere type of way when the one they "don't care about" gets hurt. And show their care in very, very subtle ways (ex. their eyes widen, their mouth parts and closes again, etc) before putting up their front once more.

Chuuya, however, is open, and vocal about it. His worry is clear not only to us, but to Dazai himself, the one he shouldn't be displaying the concern to (as per the cliche). Shouldn't it be some sort of secret that Chuuya does care? Isn't that what skk's dynamic has been shaping up to be until now?

I'm telling you- the way my mind blanked when Chuuya just casually.... showed concern not once, but twice, was a sight to see.

Besides, the context makes it much more confusing, because Dazai isn't some rookie, and Chuuya knows that more than anybody. He was the youngest executive in Port Mafia's history, of course he can handle a hit or two. Of course he'd seen him handle a hit or two, sometimes without batting an eye.

Heck, Chuuya himself was hurling Dazai like a ragdoll in their reunion, which was their last meeting. And you could argue that he was going easy on him, but Dazai has mostly withstood the same damage (as far as I could see), and Chuuya was as bitter as ever.

So that kind of contradicts both what we knew of Chuuya so far, and how their dynamic was shaped to be. I mean, that just makes Chuuya a hypocrite, yeah? What makes him care now, all of a sudden? What makes him care at all?

Well, to me, this backasswards reaction implies one (or more) of the following:

- Dazai rarely got physically hurt during their partnership and thus this is an unexpected thing for him to see (during a mission).

- The four years of separation made Chuuya unsure of how much Dazai can withstand physically now. Also the fact that he isn't in the mafia anymore, aka fighting enemy organizations on the weekly, would naturally make Dazai lose his touch in a way, what prompts Chuuya's reaction.

- Dazai getting taken off guard took him off guard which led to panic. Especially since the situation was (momentarily) out of their depth. Seriously wtf even was Lovecraft?

- During the dungeon scene Dazai was an enemy, while in the Lovecraft fight he was as an ally. The difference might be significant to Chuuya.

- This has always been Chuuya's reaction to Dazai getting hurt regardless of the situation.

- "Only I can hurt him like that" ahh logic

- Asagiri was still experimenting with their dynamic and thus there are some inconsistencies.

This scenario didn't play out again (after their reunion) for me to exactly determine which one is more plausible, but it is 100% canon for Chuuya to shamelessly show his concern and run to Dazai to check on him before properly dealing with their opponent, which I find to be such an appealing layer to their dynamic, and a good spin on the type of character he gets stereotyped as.

Bonus: Dazai also becomes a softy when Chuuya's hurt, especially post corruption. Dead Apple alone displays that multiple times.

All in all, Skk are doing a terrible job at maintaining their 'hostile' and 'antagonistic' relationship post their reunion. Freaks.

[angel5ofp0rn]

Price asking Gaz and Soap how to get his ex-wife to reply to his text. They both jokingly tell him to send a dick pic.

He tells them to piss off but after they leave, he closes his office door, sits at his desk and stares at the phone for awhile.

Couldn’t hurt. It’s not like it’s something she hasn’t seen before.

He undoes his belt, lowers his pants and boxer briefs just a bit. He pulls out his thick cock and gives it a few tugs.

The photo shows off his toned (but growing softer) abdomen as well as his cock in his hand.

She calls him immediately to cuss him out about sending stuff like that to her…

They end up having phone sex.

[onionowt]

Sky sketch dump without any context (I'm trying to warm up sorry)

[sofiaruelle]

Oh? A Customer?

[ew-selfish-art]

Dpxdc AU: consultant groups can be used to outsource problems for companies so why not monarchies?

Danny is listening to the various eyeballs and ghosts chatter on about all the issues that he now has to oversee and advise and make so many freaking decisions on. It’s annoying that it all has to come down to his call because he was a dumb 14 year old who didn’t want his town to permanently live in the ghost zone.

Now 17, King of the Infinite, and a bit wiser to the world, Danny is doing his best to balance his teenage ambitions to not give a shit and his protective obsession to very much give a shit.

Sams parents are making her learn the family business and Tucker is trying to make this internship he’s got with a fancy tech company out of New Jersey into a career without college… so while they’re commiserating with Danny the idea comes up.

Earth has a shit ton of heroes. Like, ever since the Justice League *poofed* the GIW out of existence with the Meta human acts- more and more caped crusaders seemed to be coming out of the wood work. More villains too but still, more people who seemed wise to their abilities and morals. Danny has literally never taken an ethics class.

But rn, Eye-mothy and Eye-Bert are arguing over how Danny as King Phantom is supposed to tackle the problem of some fucking pool acting as a weird trade route with a cult and… ugh it’s just so boring but like also such a fucking problem. But… maybe it can be someone else’s issue.

Opening a portal, Danny escapes into space and gets to work finding the base of operations- Tucker had told him there was a new satellite after all and there’s no way it wasn’t connected to the hero orgs- and boom he flies into the Watchtower.

“Hey- are any of you guys willing to consult on some weird pools of ectoplasm in Pakistan? Green and glowing little lakes of bullshit and magic?” Danny asks into the meeting room of the JL regardless of their startled and alarmed exclamations.

“… I could consult on that.” A voice comes from the corner, and Danny recognizes him as one of the bat people. Or bird? The guy is in a lot of red and clearly wasn’t supposed to be in this meeting based on the way he’s propped in the corner. The room erupts in protest but Danny barely hears them through his excitement and focus on the dude.

“Great! I’ll have him back before the end of the day! Lets go Bird boy!” And with that, Danny grabbed the Bird, chucked them both through a portal back into his thrown room and begins to explain the way these eyeballs are totally trying to trap him into doing more work than he needs to do.

“What do I call you by the way? I’m Danny but you’ll probably hear them call me King Phantom.”

“I go by Red Robin, and honestly, I’ve been trying to get this shit taken care of for years.”

From there Tim becomes a regular consultant for King Phantom- the Bat Family is losing their minds with him constantly going to the land of the dead but also Constantine said not to piss off the king at all costs.

Danny is just thrilled that this dude has a shit ton of insight as well as business sense- like he could legit run the monarchy way better than him despite the fact that they’re the same age.

They end up working together for years, and even when there’s not an active issue at hand, Danny will meet up with the bird just to talk.

Sam and Tucker think they’re hilarious each time they ask if Danny’s proposed yet.

Tim has already planned their wedding but all of that information is in a folder more secured than the nuclear codes- Danny needs to ask him on a date first.

[jazze-bee]

Headcanon time hear me out

[umblrspectrum]

hi im back

[wistfullywaiting2]

The biggest misconception in the bsd fandom ever to me is people constantly portraying Atsushi as someone who trauma dumps excessively when he canonically barely talks about it at all.

The entire point is that Atsushi does not talk about his trauma he’s just constantly thinking about/reliving it. He can’t escape the memories of his past so he tries not to acknowledge them.

He only mentions it when asked, either directly or when someone asks him to explain himself.

Atsushi doesn’t even give a cohesive explanation for what he saw while under Dogra Magra, he just apologizes to Haruno and Naomi.

If Lucy hadn’t had her whole “you’ve never suffered the way I have” spiel then I doubt even the audience would’ve gotten to find out about his scars

If Akutagawa never asked him how it felt for the orphanage headmaster to die Atsushi would have never told him that he’s been hallucinating.

In the omake where Kyoka asks him why his hair is like that it’s clear he wouldn’t have told her that unless she had asked.

In 55 minutes Atsushi very briefly mentions sleeping on a dirty floor somewhere to Kunikida because he was trying to explain and justify his behavior.

And the thing is that there are scenes that implies that the other characters see Atsushi behaving strangely and are visibly confused because they do not understand what’s wrong with him.

Remember, we as an audience get to see things about characters that the main cast doesn’t. Just because we see into Atsushi’s mind doesn’t mean the other characters know what’s going on in there.

Also little footnote here that I think this is a reference to the moon over the mountain but I digress

[kazutora-kurokawa]

could I possibly please get Tenjiku with a partner that never cries...but always ends up crying after sex? lmao just something about being taken care of by the men makes them break down after and cuddle into them while they try to get ahold of themself

Tenjiku x Reader Who Cries After Sex

♡ Mostly SFW, suggestive/post-sex, crying, reader is usually stoic and lowkey affection starved ♡

Characters: Izana, Kakucho, Ran, Rindou, Mucho, Mochi, Shion

note: thanks for requesting anon 🩷

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Izana

🎴 Confused as hell, has no clue why you're crying

🎴 Just lays next to you and rubs your back while you cry

"Shhh you're okay angel, just relax f'me."

Kakucho

🩷 Thinks he did something wrong and starts apologizing while cleaning you up

🩷 Runs a bath for the both of you and holds you to his chest the whole time

"It's okay darlin', you can cry all you want. Just let me take care of you."

Ran

💜 Laughs because he finds it funny that someone as serious as you is crying just from some affection

💜 Turns your crying into an excuse for a second round

"Aww princess, are you feeling extra needy?"

Rindou

🩵 Doesn't know what to do, so he just holds you and kisses your tears away

🩵 Only pulls away when you stop crying, even then he's still kissing your face

"Sit back and relax baby, I'm gonna take good care of you."

Mucho

💙 He can tell you're affection starved, so he's not even caught off guard by your crying

💙 Holds you close and buries your face in his chest

"You're always so sensitive after sex, it's okay though. I'll always take care of you, my pretty girl."

Mochi

🍡 Jokes about you being sensitive, but only because he's trying his hardest not to fold from how cute you're being

🍡 Extra gentle when he cleans you up, smothers you with kisses

"You don't have to cry sweetie, I'm practically doing the bare minimum."

Shion

♥️ Starts to panic and tries to comfort you by holding you

♥️ Buries his face in your neck and leaves kisses all over it

"Lemme make you feel better bunny."

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Taglist

@arlerts-angel @i-literally-cant-with-this @trevengersprincess @giugiette @katkusuo @happy-trenchcoated-impala @drunkcheesecake @darkstarlight82 @reiners-milkbiddies @manji-hoe @southside-otaku

[mellowwillowy]

“Merry Christmas, where is my present?”

CW: Gruesome shits

LIfE Project — CatboX

Yan! Hacker will casually give you all sort of blackmail materials.

Yan! Mafia Ringleader will give you the head of your enemy <3

Yan! Lawyer Husband will commit arson for you to warm you up.

Yan! Boyfriend will clear your whole wishlist and shopping cart. Or maybe secretly break another person’s leg for you.

Yan! Supermodel will bring down this person’s very reputation with her influence and social status.

Yan! Best Friend will diss you for it before giving you the thing you’ve been wanting along with something you don’t remember ever telling him about.

Yan! Knight will give you his sword (aww, he uses this sword to slaughter all those people who tried to court you)

Yan! Priest will let you defile the holy statue of a God that he doesn’t acknowledge (because you are his God, duhh)

Yan! King will let you torture and kill any concubine that you deem annoying while backing you.

Yan! Crown Prince will let you burn a whole ass village just for funsies.

Yan! Puppeteer will give you a voodoo doll of your enemy, made of their skin, hair and flesh.

Yan! Aristocrat will rip your enemy’s fingernails and make you watch him do it.

Yan! Collector will teach you how to preserve your enemy’s limbs and organs properly.

Yan! Calamity will show you the demise of the very hometown of your enemy.

Yan! God will give you a land of your own after making the previous citizens flee from it.

Yan! Henchman will let you have a feel of his literal heart, thumping for you.