#levelling up journey

[stardust-swan]

Why You Should Always Use Your Best Now Instead of Saving it for Later

🌹 Because you deserve to feel your best every day, not just on occasions.

🌹 Because "later" rarely comes.

🌹 Because you're just wasting your own money if you buy some high-quality makeup or skincare products just for them to expire barely used because you wanted to save them for an occasion.

🌹 Because life is unpredictable. What if a guest drops by unexpectedly and you're eating from a chipped plate or a tupperware container? What if you see your ex, or your crush, or meet the love of your life, or see your boss, or see someone who was mean to you in school, and you're wearing a worn-out hoodie and sweatpants with a hole? Many of us would feel self-conscious if something like that happened, but it can be avoided if you wear nice clothes and use your good china instead of keeping it hidden away for some possible future special event.

🌹 Because what's the point in having beautiful floral china, just for it to gather dust while you eat off of chipped plates and mismatched mugs? What's the point in owning silk blouses and cashmere jumpers, just for them to stay in your closet for months or years while you wear ratty t-shirts and sweatpants? What's the point in buying high quality makeup, just for it to spoil while you wear cheap stuff that's hard to put on and makes your face look cakey? Why own beautiful belongings just for them to never see the light of day?

🌹 Because using your best every day will show that you genuinely live well, instead of coming across as a phony when you meet the Joneses.

🌹 Because it's sad, after someone passes away, to see their fancy china, beautiful clothes, and other treasures in storage, rarely or never used, always waiting for an occasion that never came. If you won't use your best, who will? Life is short.

🌹 Because using your best everyday doesn't have to mean that special occasions will feel less special. Instead of only bringing out the good dinnerware for guests, use it everyday, but make occasions feel different with a spectacular floral arrangement, or with classical music on in the background instead of the TV. Wear your good foundation and mascara everyday, but wear a bolder makeup look for an event.

🌹 Because people's tastes change throughout the years. What if you buy something, keep it for later, and by the time later comes, you don't like it at all anymore?

🌹 Because special occasions still feel special even when you don’t use your best for them.

🌹 Because using beautiful items instead of settling for mediocrity elevates a normal day from feeling mundane to feeling decadent and luxurious.

Wear your good makeup. Wear your chic clothes. Put on your good skincare products. Doodle in your pretty notebooks. Burn your fancy candles. Spray your expensive perfume. Drink the expensive gifted wine. Eat the gourmet chocolates. Live in the now, not the uncertain future. Honour yourself by allowing yourself to use these special treasures.

[lonely-l1lypad]

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭.

Here are some points I suggest everyone on a self-improvement journey should read and think about, whether you are just starting or if you are well into your journey<3

These are things I've thought about for a while, and I tried to keep them as concise as possible. If you want me to expand further on anything or need advice, you are more than welcome to send me an ask!

i.

You can’t hate yourself into something you love.

For you to actually become a version of yourself that you love, you have to love the version of yourself that you started with. I can’t stress this enough – you can’t hate yourself into something you love. You have to start trying to love the original version of you, with all your faults and imperfections. Even if you think you’re fat and ugly. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with trying to be a better version of yourself, but that doesn’t mean you have to hate the old version. If you start your self-improvement journey hating yourself, and all you can think about is trying to become this romanticized version of yourself that you have in your head, I guarantee you that you will still hate yourself no matter what you do. In your mind you will still be the first version of yourself that you hated. You have to try loving the first version of yourself. You have to put in the work from day one. It’s not going to be easy, and it might take some time, but you owe it to yourself. At the end of the day, you’re the only person you can depend on. If you can’t love your appearance, try loving yourself for what’s in your heart and your brain. Love yourself for trying to be healthier, for showing up for yourself and others, for being kind, for being a good person, and so on. You are so much more than your appearance. Please start trying to love yourself.

ii.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.

This might seem like the most obvious thing ever, but you’d be surprised how many people expect to see results while putting in zero work. For something to change, you actually have to change something. It doesn’t have to be anything drastic, in the beginning it can be something that seems very insignificant. What matters is that you do something. Find the area of your life you’re most desperate to change and find one little thing you can do to improve it. And remember, be realistic about it – if you want to work out more, don’t let your first goal be to work out for an hour every day. This relates more to my third point, but again – you have to change something, whether it is your routine, mindset, or something else, for you to see change in your life.

iii.

Take little baby steps – a little is better than nothing.

You cannot wake up one day, decide to change everything about yourself, and expect your new routine to stick. We are creatures of habit, and everyone who has had a sudden extreme change in their life knows how difficult it is, regardless of whether the change was for good or for bad. That is why taking baby steps is so important. I recommend you try to find out, through journaling or whatever your preferred method of self-reflection is, what you want to change, what you want to improve. Then you find a small thing you can do in each area, or even just one, that you can try to start doing. One little thing. One little thing that you can actually commit to and manage to do every day, or at least regularly. When you’ve actually managed to change your routine, and implemented a new habit, you can find something else, something a little bigger, to do. By doing it this way, and not implementing drastic changes from the beginning, you’re setting yourself up for success. If you make unrealistic expectations for yourself, you’re only going to be disappointed in yourself and lose all motivation.

To expand on the example I gave in my last point: if your goal is to start working out, and you expect yourself to suddenly workout for an hour every day, you’re going from zero to a hundred. Your first goal should be to do something almost every day, and that something can be a 5-minute stretch one day, and a 10-minute walk another day. That’s much more sustainable and realistic. Once you get into the habit of doing that, you can start setting higher expectations for yourself.

iv.

Fake it till you make it.

You won’t suddenly wake up one day with amazing confidence. By now we’ve all probably heard about Beyonce’s alter ego Sasha Fierce, but truly, there is something to it. You don’t have to create an alter ego for yourself, but you do have to embody the qualities you wish to have. If you want to become a confident person, you have to pretend to be one, even if your knees are shaking and you’re terrified. These qualities you wish to have aren’t something you suddenly gain, they are something you train yourself into. Think of them like muscles. If you want to squat a hundred kilos, you won’t get there overnight, you have to train squats with heavy weights. For you to be a confident person, you have to practise and pretend you already are one. Maybe not the best analogy, but I hope you understand what I’m trying to say. In every situation you are in, act as the person you want to become, until acting like that person is your second nature.

v.

Stop worrying if other people like you – do you like them?

Instead of worrying if people like you or not, start asking yourself whether you like them. There’s a saying – “you can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will always be someone who hates peaches.” No matter how good of a person you are, how nice, how kind, how wonderful you are – there are people who just won’t like you, not matter what. And you should not care about that. It is exhausting to try to be a person everyone likes, and it is quite frankly not possible. Stop trying to impress everyone and start asking yourself if you like them. For the longest time I was sad when a group of girls I know didn’t invite me to their parties, until I had a realisation that I literally don’t like them. I wanted to be “cool enough” to get an invitation, but I didn’t think about the fact that if I did get an invitation, I would be miserable the whole time because I don’t like them. Start living for yourself. Make decisions on your own terms and for yourself, and not to please other people who don’t care or like you anyway. Living for yourself and not caring about what other people think is almost like a superpower.

That's it for now, thank you so much for reading<3

Love, Lily

[daphnedauphinoise]

Hello Daphne!

How are you? I hope everything is alright. I was invited to an Apple interview for a job and I'm super nervous. What are some resources I could use to prepare?

Hello my love,

First of all congratulations and second of all, lets get into it.

What you need to take? What should you wear?

One of the best ways to combat nervousness is preparation. I am presuming your interview will either be face to face or online and I presume you know the setup. If you don't, learn asap. Look at how you will get there, on time, and check google maps to make sure you know where you are going. I would advise to turn up 30 minutes before your interview. If the building is big, you will need time to find the place and set yourself up. I like to arrive early, find my interviewing place and then go into the bathroom for final check. If the interview is online, make sure you know how to set up the meeting and you have taken measures to make sure you laptop/computer doesn't crash. Also make sure your microphone and camera works.

Prepare you bag, your outfit and your route in advance. Your interview request email should have the names of any documents or proof they require so pack those. Make sure you have a snack, water and mints or gum. And do all this a couple of days in advance.

Again, your interview request should say what they expect you to wear. If you are not sure, pop them an email and ask. What you wear to an interview is dependant on the company and the sector. You wouldn't wear bright colourful prints to a financial office interview as you would for an interview at your local indie art studio. It is always better to be smarter than it is to be casual though. Whatever you wear, make sure you feel good in it as well. Not all white blouses are made equally. I perfer to wear natural makeup and I still to minimal jewellery and clean nails for interviews.

On the day make sure you have some food in you. Listen to some hype music, pamper yourself the day before and even do a power pose for 30 secs to get you into that confidence zone. If you any specific anxities, google up solutions. Deep breathes and affirmations work wonders as well.

The ERIQ way

Your interview research is important. The only time I haven't recieved a job or a placement offer was when I was dragged after school to a 5* hotel for an interview and I was promptly rejected :) . Do not make this mistake I follow the ERIQ rule that I was taught.

The Employer

You need to research the business you are applying to and you need to know beyond the basics. This will demonstrate your interest in the company you are applying to. You need to know what kind of company are they? What have they achieved (major and recent) ? Who are their competitors ? What is the history of the company? What are the value and culture of the company? Any good employee would know this about the company and you want to show them that you are the best potential at being their good employee.

The Role

You need to understand your role. Go back to the job application form and look at the requirements. Make sure you actually do know everything they have asked for you to know. You need to make sure you understand exactly what they need from as a canditate so you can answer interview questions well. Being able to talk about your accomplishments and qualifications (What they are? How you got them? How they help you? etc) is crucial as interviewers want to whether you are a good fit or not. If you are not fully qualified, that is okay. Make sure to highlight your egarness to learn and maybe perhaps show that you have taken the initiative to fix your weak areas.

I want you this a step further. I want you to look into what the company's competitors require for their canditates. Cross check between various jobs and compare what they are all looking for. Make sure you know the ins and outs of your role. I like to write out make a spider-diagram for this. I reccomend you to do this more-so for your own benefit. By looking at various jobs you will not only see if your company is asking too much or too little but it gives an insight to other skills for your role that you can consider learning. I also like going on GlassDoor.com to check salaries and reviews left by previous employees.

The Interviwer

People like flattery and people like talking about themselves and people love being made feel important. Find out as much as you can about your interviewers and this will help create a postive impression of you. The email that asked you to come to the interview should have their names somewhere. Then hop onto LinkedIn and stalk look into them. Try and find as much as you can about them. The company websites usually have mini bios on their employee which can you read to find their personal and professional interests. You will use this information in your interview to get them to like you. Now you do not want to pander because that is messy and uncomfortable, everything you do has to sutble. For example, your interviewer John Apple-Smith asks you, 'When was the last time you were challegened?' but you know from your mini-detective work that John Apple-Smith really likes extreme sports.. it says so on the company website. So you wear a pensive look on your face, you will look slighty to the left ( that is where you look when you are thinking- body language 101 ) and after couple seconds pause you reply that 'last winter your friendship group held a mini winter olympics with where each week you guys would try out a new winter sport. Now you are very afraid of speed so freestyle skiing was very challenging ( Tip! When answering, use words from the question ) because you were very scared. You still haven't gotten over your fear but you did like it and you are looking forward to going up a little bit higher this winter :)'

The Questions

You will need to prepare how will you answer the questions and also equally important, you need to prepare questions for your interviewers. This tiktoker is really good with interview question prep. I highly suggest you look through his tiktoks and make notes. Make sure you have prepared for both generic questions like ' what are your strengths' and out of the blue questions like ' what would you pack for a universe trip?' . You can easily find company specific questions online as well, espcecially for a company is big as Apple. Just search what kind of questions will be asked and work on from there.

This stage is crucial because your interviwers are trying scope out if you are the kind of person they would enjoy working with and in general how would you be as a worker in the company. You will also be asked questions on your qualifications and your previous work related experiences.

You need to be prepare your own questions. As much as it is them interviewing you, by the time you leave that interview you should know whether you actually even want to work there. You can ask about salary or the after work culture.

Tip! Take time to digest the question and if you don't understand the question, be brave and ask for clarification! Let say John Apple-Smith asks you 'When was the last time you were challenged?' and you are not sure if he means in a work enviroment or in your personal life, ask!

If you are lacking confidence your uni/college or a employablity service should have people that can help you practice your interview techniques. If not, grab a friend and roleplay.

Making a good impression

Be on time! I cannot stress this enough. Be on time! Infact this is more for you than it is for the interview. Being late makes you feel panicky and you are more likely to be stressed and flustered.

Be polites and cordial. Be nice to everyone you meet as you enter the front door. Smile, make good contact and remember your manners.

Watch your body language. Straighten up your posture, hold you head high. When giving handshakes, make sure it a firm but gentle shake. Do not figdet and do not rush your words.

Keep your answers clear and concise. When asked about your personal life, stray away from gossip and any personal details. Don't go off on tangents and keep things simple.

After the interview

As soon as an interview finishes, I wap out my phone and type into my notes app how it went. I write down questions that took me off guard or questions I answered particularly well. I also note down what I thought of the company and if I would like to work there. On my way back home, I like to draft a thank you email which I send before 24 hrs after my interview.

There are only really three outcomes from an interview:

Acception - Yay! Congrats! Well done for getting in. Take some time before signing the job and make sure you can talk and clarified any issues like salary.

Rejection- In my head there is no rejection. I either get accpeted or I learn. Rejection is redirection. It is okay to be rejected. Send them a thank you email (again) and ask for feedback so you can imporve for your next interview.

Futher Steps- Usually the interview is the last step but for some companies they might ask for interview round 2 or test so prepare for those.

I really hope this helps. There is this masterlist as well if you need any more guidance and remember google is free. Search up any tiny questions you have, whatever pust you to ease. I hope it goes well for you, come back and tell us. You've got this babygirl!

Daphne xoxo

[theambitiouswoman]

Green Flags in Communication 💚💬

"I want to know when I hurt your feelings."

This shows they are willing to understand and acknowledge the impact of their actions.

"I don't want you to feel alone in this."

This shows empathy and indicates that the person is supportive and does not want the person to deal with issues alone.

"I've been struggling with ___”

This demonstrates vulnerability and trust, as the person is open about their struggles.

"How have you been feeling about ___? I know it's been on your mind a lot."

This shows concern for the other person's issues or worries, showing that they are listening and care about what's important to the other person.

"I feel __ when you __; are you open to trying __ next time?"

This is an example of constructive communication.

"What do you need from me when this happens with your family?"

This shows awareness and sensitivity to the persons family dynamics and a willingness to provide support.

"I appreciate when you ___.”

Expressing appreciation is vital for positive reinforcement and acknowledging the efforts and qualities of the other person.

"I didn't handle that well."

This is a sign of self-awareness and accountability, recognizing one's own mistakes and being open to learning and growth.

"I'm sorry, I was wrong to say that. I'll try to be more mindful in the future."

Shows you are able to apologize genuinely and a commitment to improving behavior.

"Tell me more about that; I'm really interested in hearing your perspective."

Indicates a genuine interest in the other person's thoughts and feelings.

"I noticed you seemed a bit off today. Is everything okay?"

It shows you are attentive to the other person's emotional state and a readiness to provide support.

"I'm here for you, no matter what you need."

Offers unconditional support, creating a sense of security in the relationship.

"I love how passionate you are about your hobbies. It's inspiring to see."

Expresses admiration for the other person's interests.

"Let's work on a solution together. What do you think would be fair?"

Focusing on collaboration rather than conflict.

"I trust your judgment on this."

Trust and respect for the other person's decision-making abilities.

"Your happiness is important to me. Let's make sure you're taking time for yourself."

Prioritizes the other person's happiness and emphasizes the importance of self care.

"It's okay to feel that way. Do you want to talk about it more?"

Validates the other person's feelings.

"I appreciate how you handled that situation. You're really good at ___."

Praises specific strengths or skills, boosting the other person's self-esteem.

"I know we disagree, but I respect your point of view."

Acknowledges differences in opinion while still maintaining respect and understanding.

[fyi-iyanni]

When you that girl 💕✨

[theereina]

[foreverrryourssss]

[hermajestyimher]

You must master the art of believing in yourself. Nothing will propel you more forward in life than unwavering belief in yourself and your capabilities. This means rejecting any thoughts of self-doubt, of glorifying the input of others over your own, of seeing yourself as beneath others, or putting the considerations of others over your own.

You want to develop the type of confidence that is rooted so deeply within you that nothing can shake it. Having that type of confidence will keep you focused on the goal or mission and will keep you going when things get tough. It won't allow the opinions of others to skew the path you've decided for yourself.

[windonthewaters]

[stardust-swan]

The complete masterpost on how to smell like a Princess 💐🧴🌸

ARMPITS

🌸 Long armpit hair traps sweat and the smell can be quite noticeable. Wax or nair off the hair (instead of shaving, which causes dark discolouration), or if you don't want to have completely hairless armpits, trim the hair down short with a small pair of scissors.

🌸 Know the difference between deodorant and antiperspirant. Deodorant: stops the smell. Antiperspirant: stops the sweat. Some products may do one but not the other, although most do both.

🌸 Use a men's deodorant instead of women's deodorant. The antiperspirant is much stronger than in women's deodorant. Old Spice makes nice ones that don't smell particularly masculine despite the brand being associated with men. Old Spice Deep Sea smells like sea salt, Old Spice Fiji smells like coconuts, Old Spice Oasis is sweet and slightly vanilla scented, Old Spice Wolfthorn is sweet citrus, and Old Spice Timber smells like sandalwood.

🌸 Apply deodorant after you shower instead of waiting a while.

🌸 Apply antiperspirant at night instead of morning so that it has all night to get absorbed

🌸 Vanilla extract can be used as a natural deodorant. Because it's alcohol based, it kills bacteria and the vanilla scent stays all day.

🌸 Use deodorant as a preventative measure, not a fix for an already-stinky armpit or a replacement for washing.

🌸 Use salicylic acid toner on the armpits. This lowers the pH of your armpits to be inhospitable to odour-causing bacteria

🌸 Hand sanitiser can be used in a pinch (not regularly though as it's bad if you use it too often)

🌸 Washing your armpits with Head & Shoulders shampoo and letting it sit for a bit before rinsing off is really good for getting rid of bad odour due to the zinc in it

🌸 Exfoliate your underarms in the shower to slough off dead skin and deodorant build-up that could be making any products you use under your arms less effective. You can use the same exfoliator you use on your face or body on your armpits.

🌸 To dry your armpits completely, use a hairdryer, apply deodorant, then dry them again. It will make such a difference, as it gets your armpits completely dry, whereas as towel drying alone can often leave some moisture, which is more likely to make you smell.

🌸 If you suffer from excessive underarm sweating, go see your doctor. They can prescribe you an industrial strength antiperspirant which may solve your issue.

CLOTHES

🌸 Don't leave your clothes in the washing machine for too long after they've finished washing, this makes them develop a bad smell. Put them to dry as soon as possible after washing.

🌸 If possible, use the tumble dryer instead of leaving your clothes to air-dry in winter. If clothes are left for hours and hours and not really drying because it's too cold, they develop a bad mildewy smell.

🌸 Dry your clothes outside in the sun whenever possible

🌸 Use scented dryer sheets (but make sure the scent isn't one that clashes with your perfume).

🌸 An old-fashioned tip is to keep cut up soap and lavender in the same drawer as your clothes. You can just stick a scented soap or sachets with potpourri in the closet with your clothes to make them smell nice.

🌸 In hardware stores, you can buy cedar blocks to put in your closet, which as well as making your clothes smell nice, also keep spiders, moths, and centipedes away

🌸 Add a capful of white vinegar to the washing machine when you're washing your clothes (no, this won't make your clothes smell like vinegar. It kills unwanted scents and helps remove stains).

🌸 Add a few drops of essential oils such as lavender, peppermint, tea tree, or eucalyptus to your laundry detergent (you can add some to your dryer sheets as well). Make sure they're clear, light, essential oils, and not dark resiny ones, as that will stain your clothes. You can put a few drops of essential oils on the bottom of your drawer, right on the wooden part too.

🌸 You can buy special laundry perfumes to put in the fabric softener department. The scent lasts for ages

🌸 Avoid harsh or heavy scented laundry detergent and washing powders. Stick to neutral, light-scented ones

🌸 Wear breathable fabrics like cotton, hemp, linen, and silk. This will make more air circulate around your body. Avoid nylon and polyester.

🌸 Wash your bathrobe once a week

🌸 Spray Febreeze or perfume on the clothes in your closet once a week

🌸 Wash any clothes you haven't worn in a while, even if you're not planning on wearing them soon, to prevent a stale smell. It will make your whole wardrobe smell much better

FEET

🌸 Wear clean cotton socks. Don't reuse worn socks days in a row

🌸 Always wear socks. Not wearing them makes it much more likely for your feet to start smelling bad

🌸 Don't wear the same pair of shoes every day, as this can make odour-causing bacteria grow because they don't get a chance to dry out.

🌸 If you're staying somewhere overnight, remember to bring a 2nd pair of shoes to change into instead of wearing the same pair twice in a row

🌸 Put baby powder on your feet before putting socks on

🌸 Always dry your feet thoroughly after washing, including between each toe. This prevents the development of foot fungus

🌸 Use foot spray or shoe spray

🌸 Scent rises, so spray a little perfume in your shoes or on your ankles

🌸 Pat some glycolic acid on the soles of your feet with a cotton pad each morning

HAIR

🌸 Spray some perfume on your hairbrush before brushing. Grace Kelly swore by this

🌸 Apply dry shampoo the night before instead of the morning of so that your hair has time to absorb it

🌸 Hair absorbs scent a lot, so wash it regularly

🌸 Add a tiny drop of perfume oil into a few drops of hair oil and apply to your hair

🌸 It's obvious, but using a shampoo and conditioner that smells good will make your hair smell good

🌸 Consider using a hairspray or hair mist

HOME

🌸 Change pillowcases and bedding regularly. Oils, sweat and dead skin cells will accumulate if you go too long using the same sheets.

🌸 Open the windows regularly and leave your bed to air before making it once a week. No airflow means your environment will be more warm and sweaty, making it more likely to develop bacteria that makes you smell bad

🌸 Light a scented candle or incense regularly so that your home always smells lovely

🌸 Have multiple towels so you can use a new one each time you shower. Once a towel is wet, germs start growing, which can make you smell. Clean your towels regularly

🌸 Above all, make sure your house is clean. It doesn't matter how many of these tips you follow, if your home smells bad, you'll smell like it. Plus if you bring someone home and your house smells, no matter how good you personally smell, that's the impression they'll have of you. Clean regularly.

MOUTH

🌸 Floss after eating. Food particles trapped in between the teeth can make your breath smell bad. Even if you don't notice it, others will.

🌸 Use mouthwash after eating or drinking. Avoid mouthwashes with alcohol, as they can dry out your mouth, and your mouth should be moist if you want to reduce bad breath.

🌸 Brush your tongue or use a tongue scraper. This gets rid of bacteria that can build up and make your breath smell bad.

🌸 Keep a pack of mints or gum in your bag for after you eat or drink out (avoid chewing gum if you grind your teeth or clench your jaw though - it's not good for overworked muscles that need to relax).

🌸 Brush your teeth morning and night. Make sure to brush the hard to reach places, like the back molars. And brush for at least two minutes.

🌸 Bad smelling bacteria builds up in your mouth if it's dry and saliva isn't being produced, so drink water consistently throughout the day and eat every few hours, even if it's just a small snack

🌸 Take probiotics for mouth health to replace bad smelly bacteria with good bacteria

🌸 It's not too important, but if you're talking at close range with someone, you'll be able to smell if they have a scented lip product on, so if you want, put on a scented lipgloss, lipstick, or lip balm. My personal favourites are Glossier Birthday Cake lip balm and Fresh Rose Lip Treatment.

🌸 Chew a sprig of rosemary or mint after eating, it makes your breath smell clean and herbaceous.

🌸 A Princessy mouthwash recipe you can try is putting 60g of dried rose petals in 240ml of rosewater and heating gently for 2 hours, then straining and adding 180ml of liquid honey. As well as making your breath smell beautiful, it also helps to soothe a sore throat.

🌸 An underrated tip is to gargle with hot salt water to kill bacteria. This is good when you're somewhere without access to mouthwash.

🌸 If you take good care of your mouth hygiene but bad breath persists, you may have tonsil stones. You can extract them by rubbing a Qtip on your tonsil.

SIGNATURE SCENT

🌸 Learn your body chemistry. Get a variety of sample perfumes and see what they smell like after 30 minutes, 2 hours, a day. Scent profiles develop and change over time, and a perfume that smells good at first might not after a few hours. See what smells good consistently.

🌸 Apply Vaseline or a light unscented lotion to the area where you'll be spraying the perfume to make it last longer

🌸 Buy a rollerball of your favourite perfume so you can reapply when you're out and about if the scent of your perfume fades

🌸 If possible, spend money on a high end Eau de Parfum. 1 or 2 sprays will suffice, and the scent lasts all day. Sprays from Bath and Body and Victoria's Secret smell nice and all, but fade quickly.

🌸 Keep in mind that some perfumes may only be suitable for certain seasons. A light citrusy scent may be fine in summer, but confusing in winter

🌸 Scent rises, so rub scented lotion on your legs. If you want you can spray some scent inside your shoes or on your ankles.

🌸 Hot skin areas close to your veins like behind the knees, behind the ears, the back of the neck, and on the wrists are good areas to apply perfume. Currently, it's popular in the perfume community to spray on the stomach and forearms too.

🌸 If you're sensitive to perfumes, a perfume oil could be a good substitute (in former Ottoman countries, perfume oil is more popular than spray perfume).

🌸 Less is more with perfume. Never overspray. It's better for the scent to subtly creep up on people than to overwhelm them. Perfume should be intimate, a beautiful association people make with being close to you (isn't it a lovely idea that nobody will know that your hair smells like rose hair mist until your lover buries their face in it, or that your neck smells like Hypnotic Poison until your lover leans in to kiss it?)

🌸 Be aware that people may have sensitivities or allergies to perfume if you're going to be in an enclosed space, for example on an airplane, a cinema, or an office cubicle. It's okay just to smell clean rather than of perfume (Kate Middleton and Megan Markle don't wear any perfume at official state events for that reason).

🌸 Don't be afraid to ask other people about their opinions on your perfume. Of course, it's important that you like your perfume, but everyone else around you will have to smell it too. Some perfumes have associations that you may not necessarily want to portray. For example, Victoria's Secret perfumes are often associated with teenagers, and Chanel No.5 is often associated with grandmas. If you love them, you do you, but just keep this in mind if you're wary of creating certain associations with yourself.

🌸 Choose moisturising and hygiene products that go well with your signature scent. For example, vanilla or cocoa butter moisturiser with a perfume in the gourmand family of fragrances.

🌸 In the same vein as above, you can also choose moisturisers that add dimension to your signature scent, like making a floral perfume smell more summery by using a coconut moisturiser, or making a vanilla scent smell more Christmassy by using a peppermint body wash and lotion.

🌸 Don't mix scents that don't go well together. It will smell confusing if you use a warm vanilla sugar lotion with a musky perfume.

🌸 Don't overload on too many strongly scented products, it's overwhelming. If your perfume is very strong, use a lightly scented or unscented lotion.

🌸 It's okay to have more than one signature scent. The perfume you wear at the office doesn't have to be the same perfume you wear at parties, which doesn't have to be the perfume you wear relaxing at home.

🌸 It's also okay to have no signature scent, and just pick a perfume that fits your mood on a given day

🌸 Try and find a perfume that matches your lifestyle. If you're a minimalist, pick a fresh, light scent, such as Dolce and Gabbana Light Blue. If you love to bake and adore the smell of vanilla, sugar and buttercream, try a gourmand perfume, like Dior's Hypnotic Poison or Ariana Grande's Cloud. If you live an outdoorsy lifestyle, try a woody scent like Santal 33 by Le Labo. Your scent should match your vibe, if you're not naturally a party girl or a chic lady, don't try to fake it with perfume, it will just be confusing.

🌸 Don't pick a perfume you don't personally like just because someone else recommends it, like wearing a scent you find grandma-like just because someone said it will make you smell Old Money. You're the one who has to smell it all day

🌸 Spray a little perfume on your hair and wrists before going to sleep to feel soft, pretty, and luxurious, like a Princess or an Old Hollywood star

🌸 A tip from exotic dancers is to spray perfume right after showering, moisturise, then spray the perfume again to really lock in the scent

🌸 Read books like The Secret of Scent by Luca Turin, Fragrance and Wellbeing by Jennifer Peace Rhind, and Scent and Subversion by Barbara Herman to understand the science of scent and what smells great from the point of view of a perfume expert.

🌸 If you want free samples, try e-mailing a perfume house saying you've seen a promo of their perfume and would be interested in a complimentary sample (send your address too). Usually they read lots of complaints, so they'll be glad if they can make someone happy (this may not always work with every perfume house though). You can also go to a quiet counter at a boutique and ask for samples of a perfume you want, even tell them that you're young and can't afford much and they'll give away lots.

🌸 Science has shown that women are much more sensitive to musk scents than men, so lesbian/bi ladies may want to consider trying a musk scent while on a date. And as for men, they prefer lily of the valley, as well as gourmand scents like vanilla, cinnamon, and oddly, pumpkin and lavender together. [Source]

YONI

🌸 Take probiotics

🌸 Wear cotton underwear. Avoid tight underwear and underwear with dye if possible.

🌸 Sleep without underwear. Letting your yoni breathe is great for achieving an attractive smell

🌸 Don't clean your yoni with regular soap. It can throw off your pH, which can cause yeast infections and a bad smell. It's generally okay to use soaps specifically formulated for your vulva, or gentle soaps like Johnson's baby soap or Dove sensitive.

🌸 Drink natural 100% pineapple juice and cranberry juice, or buy pills with those respective ingredients in the health store. Even if you don't want to drink it all the time, drinking cranberry/pineapple juice an hour before intimacy will make you taste sweeter.

🌸 Instead of using scented feminine hygiene products (which are bad for you), change your pad or tampon regularly. Switch to menstrual cups if possible, as there will be no smell at all (whereas the pads and tampons themselves will start smelling bad if left for too long).

🌸 Rub some roll-on deodorant in the crevice where your inner thigh meets your vulva. It develops its own B.O smell (like a leg pit). Deodorant improves the smell immensely.

🌸 Make sure your partner has clean hands/a clean mouth before touching you sensually. Also, use a condom if possible, as ejaculate inside of you can mess up your pH balance

🌸 Use Dripsticks for post-sex clean-up

🌸 Boric acid suppositories after your period help rebalance microbial flora

🌸 Use a little water to rinse after you pee. You can buy a peri bottle for postpartum to make it easier

🌸 Make sure to only wash your vulva, not inside the vagina. The inside is a self-cleaning oven, and douching or even just inserting a finger with soap is bad for it. Avoid the inner, pink parts of the labia too.

🌸 Make sure there's no discharge build-up in your pubic hair

🌸 Clean well in-between the folds and under the clitoral hood so that sebum doesn't get trapped

🌸 Make sure not to scrub too hard, as it can make soap get somewhere it shouldn't or irritate a sensitive area

🌸 Use a hairdryer to dry after showering if you don't have the time to towel off till you're completely dry. It will stop you from feeling swampy and sweaty down there.

UNCATEGORISED

🌸 Keep feminine hygiene wipes, hand sanitiser, mini deodorant, mini dry shampoo, mini mouthwash, rollerball of perfume, scented hand cream, etc in your bag to freshen up during the day

🌸 It's obvious, but shower at least once a day. If you're having unusually hot weather or live in a warm climate, take a couple of quick showers throughout the day.

🌸 Use a very strong soap on your yoni, armpits, and feet, and scrub your armpits/feet very well as they retain scents.

🌸 If you sweat a lot during the night, take a light shower in the morning to get rid of the smell of stale sweat

🌸 Before your regular shower gel, use an antibacterial soap. It will kill bacteria that can make you smell bad.

🌸 Useful websites: Fragrantica, R/Perfumes, R/Fragrance, Parfumo, R/FemFragLab

🌸 Take parsley pills. It's like an internal deodorant. And fenugreek pills make you smell sweet like maple syrup

🌸 As well as on your armpits, put deodorant under your breasts as well, and anywhere else you may sweat a lot from (if you're spraying in the crease between your thighs and abdomen, make sure you have underwear on).

🌸 If you tend to sweat under your breasts a lot, you can buy cotton breast liners that absorb sweat on Amazon

🌸 If you're doing all that you can to prevent body odour but it persists, talk to your GP or dermatologist. You may need an antiperspirant stronger than what you can buy in shops, a PanOxyl wash, or even botox injections in your armpits

🌸 A tip from Marie Antoinette is to wear perfumed gloves

🌸 Don't eat too much onions, garlic, eggs, dairy, alcohol, processed foods, red meat, fast food, or vegetables like cauliflower and broccoli. The smell will seep through your skin (a little is fine, of course). And eat plenty of leafy greens.

🌸 Eat more fruit 🍎🍇🍍🍒🍓

🌸 Drink mint tea in the morning

🌸 An obvious tip, but hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Drinking more water will help you sweat less. Plus fragrance doesn't last as long on dry skin

🌸 Avoid drinking too much alcohol or smoking cigarettes

🌸 Take chlorophyll supplements

🌸 If you tend to suffer from a sweaty face, wear a waterproof mascara and keep a setting powder on you

🌸 Most important tip of all: Stay hygienic! You need a good base for any of these tips to work. Spraying perfume and applying scented lotion on an unclean body is like putting a band-aid on a bullet wound.

🌸 And of course you don't have to use all of these tips (if anything, you'll probably end up creating a toxic fume cloud instead of a beautiful scent). Just find a few that work for you and incorporate into your routine.

[maxiglow]

be addicted to real dopamine

be in the present and notice those little things you never saw before, but that have always been there

experience new exciting things that bring you joy

love people, listen to them and create meaningful connections

make art and don’t label it as “good” or “bad,” just let your soul be free

stop scrolling on social media and start turning pages of an interesting book

do mindfulness meditation and feel your body and mind calming down

move your body, no matter how as long as you’re enjoying

listen to music that matches the moment you’re in

eat nourishing food, feel your stomach full without discomfort

get a good night of sleep and feel yourself ready for another day

[chichiscloset]

She’s a lady

[elonomhblog]

how to stay motivated long-term

trust, me i know that long-term motivation and consistency is hard. long-term motivation might be difficult to maintain, but there are effective techniques to help you stay focused and determined. whether you're seeking personal ambitions, academic achievements, or professional success, here are some strategies to help encourage motivation:

understand the reason behind your goal ☆ does your goal contribute to personal growth or meaningful relationships? ☆ how does your goal impact others? ☆ is your goal meaningful to you? if your goal lacks meaning, it may be hard to maintain motivation.

positive and negative motivation motivation can come from different places ☆ positive motivation: the desire to experience pleasure ☆ negative motivation: the desire to avoid something (an outcome) both types of motivation have their place, so learn to recognise what type fits in where. (post on this coming soon)

set up systems use your initial motivation to set up structures: ☆ create routines, systems and habits that help you towards your goal even when your motivation fluctuates ☆ when your emotions wane, rely on these systems and disciplines to maintain momentum

break down goals ☆ tackle one goal at a time to avoid feeling overwhelmed ☆ set achievable milestones and celebrate each step forward ☆ keep the momentum going by focusing on manageable tasks

validate good work ☆ give yourself a little reward, or thank yourself, for completing hard tasks ☆ this reinforces motivation and encourages effort

remember--motivation isn't in a constant state, it ebbs and flows. these small tips will help to stay motivated. i'm going to provide more information in upcoming posts, and i will link them here once they are published.

luck on your journey ❤️

[theambitiouswoman]

How To Become A Brand New Person ✨✨

Self Reflect:

Journal daily.

Think about past decisions and how they impacted your life.

Meditate regularly.

Create a vision board to visualize your goals.

Review your strengths and weaknesses.

Identify your core values and beliefs.

Figure out your passions and interests.

Think about your childhood dreams and aspirations.

Evaluate your current state of happiness and fulfillment.

Set Clear Goals:

Define specific career goals, like "Get promoted within two years."

Set health goals, like "Lose 20 pounds in six months."

Create financial goals such as "Save $10,000 for a vacation."

Establish personal development goals, like "Read 24 books in a year."

Set relationship goals, such as "Improve communication with my partner."

Define education goals, like "Complete a master's degree in three years."

Set travel goals, like "Visit five new countries in the next two years."

Create hobbies and interests goals, such as "Learn to play a musical instrument."

Set community or volunteer goals, like "Volunteer 100 hours this year."

Establish mindfulness or self-care goals, such as "Practice meditation daily."

Self Care:

Exercise for at least 30 minutes a day.

Follow a balanced diet with plenty of fruits and vegetables.

Prioritize getting 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night.

Practice in relaxation techniques like deep breathing or yoga.

Take regular breaks at work to avoid burnout.

Schedule "me time" for activities you enjoy.

Limit exposure to stressors and toxic people.

Practice regular skincare and grooming routines.

Seek regular medical check-ups and screenings.

Stay hydrated by drinking enough water daily.

Personal Development:

Read a book every month from various genres.

Attend workshops or seminars on topics of interest.

Learn a new language or musical instrument.

Take online courses to acquire new skills.

Set aside time for daily reflection and self improvement.

Seek a mentor in your field for guidance.

Attend conferences and networking events.

Start a side project or hobby to expand your abilities.

Practice public speaking or communication skills.

Do creative activities like painting, writing, or photography.

Create a Support System:

Build a close knit group of friends who uplift and inspire you.

Join clubs or organizations aligned with your interests.

Connect with a mentor or life coach.

Attend family gatherings to maintain bonds.

Be open and honest in your communication with loved ones.

Seek advice from trusted colleagues or supervisors.

Attend support groups for specific challenges (e.g., addiction recovery).

Cultivate online connections through social media.

Find a therapist or counselor for emotional support.

Participate in community or volunteer activities to meet like minded people.

Change Habits:

Cut back on sugary or processed foods.

Reduce screen time and increase physical activity.

Practice gratitude by keeping a daily journal.

Manage stress through mindfulness meditation.

Limit procrastination by setting specific deadlines.

Reduce negative self-talk by practicing self-compassion.

Establish a regular exercise routine.

Create a budget and stick to it.

Develop a morning and evening routine for consistency.

Overcome Fear and Self Doubt:

Face a specific fear head-on (example: public speaking).

Challenge your negative thoughts with positive affirmations.

Seek therapy to address underlying fears or traumas.

Take small, calculated risks to build confidence.

Visualize success in challenging situations.

Surround yourself with supportive and encouraging people.

Journal about your fears and doubts to gain clarity.

Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small.

Focus on your strengths and accomplishments.

Embrace failure as a valuable learning experience.

Embrace Change:

Relocate to a new city or country.

Switch careers or industries to pursue your passion.

Take on leadership roles in your workplace.

Volunteer for projects outside your comfort zone.

Embrace new technologies and digital tools.

Travel to unfamiliar destinations.

Start a new hobby or creative endeavor.

Change your daily routine to add variety.

Adjust your mindset to see change as an opportunity.

Seek out diverse perspectives and viewpoints.

Practice Gratitude:

Write down three things you're grateful for each day.

Express gratitude to loved ones regularly.

Create a gratitude jar and add notes of appreciation.

Reflect on the positive aspects of challenging situations.

Show gratitude by volunteering or helping others in need.

Send thank-you notes or messages to people who've helped you.

Keep a gratitude journal and review it regularly.

Share your gratitude openly during family meals or gatherings.

Focus on the present moment and appreciate the little things.

Practice gratitude even in times of adversity.

Be Patient:

Set realistic expectations for your progress.

Accept that personal growth takes time.

Focus on the journey rather than the destination.

Learn from setbacks and view them as opportunities to improve.

Celebrate small milestones along the way.

Practice self-compassion during challenging times.

Stay committed to your goals, even when progress is slow.

Keep a journal to track your personal growth.

Recognize that patience is a valuable skill in personal transformation.

Celebrate Small Wins:

Treat yourself to your favorite meal or dessert.

Reward yourself with a spa day or self-care activity.

Share your achievements with friends and loved ones.

Create a vision board to visualize your successes.

Acknowledge and congratulate yourself in a journal.

Give yourself permission to take a break and relax.

Display reminders of your accomplishments in your workspace.

Take a day off to celebrate a major milestone.

Host a small gathering to mark your achievements.

Set aside time to reflect on how far you've come.

Maintain Balance:

Set clear boundaries in your personal and work life.

Prioritize self care activities in your daily routine.

Schedule regular breaks and downtime.

Learn to say "no" when necessary to avoid overcommitment.

Evaluate your work life balance regularly.

Seek support from friends and family to avoid burnout.

Be kind to yourself and accept imperfections.

Practice mindfulness to stay present and grounded.

Revisit your priorities and adjust them as needed.

Embrace self love and self acceptance as part of your daily life.

[days-may]

I wanna see what happens if I don't give up

[a-soft-life-for-bw-moodboard]