#notice how it just spirals down into ranting

[balkanradfem]

What I learned about growing vegetables in the last 3.5 years of doing it:

Squash: it will grow even in poor soil, summer squash will grow even in the worst conditions, winter squash needs a little more care! If you plant them far apart they will grow huge. Winter squash struggles in heat, but will generally survive it and start growing again once it's not too hot.

Peppers: They have to be watered consistently and periodically after being planted outside. Even if you don't water anything else, you have to water peppers, or they will remain small. They will also cross-pollinate and if you plant hot peppers next to non-hot peppers and try to collect the seeds, next year you will have all hot peppers.

Tomatoes: They're the biggest monster plants and they will grow so vigorously and stubbornly I actually have no clue how to stunt or stop these once they're on the open fields. You're supposed to prune them but they get out of hand so fast. If they survive the 'seedling' stage god himself can't kill them. But blight could so if the lower leaves are looking sick and yellow, cut them off.

Beans: Another thing that will grow in poor soil, the most important thing I learned is that the bush variety will produce earlier, and it's a way safer bet to plant them, because if there's a drought, or slug infestation, or whatever the hell happens, bush variety will give you the produce earlier, and you're very likely to get a harvest. Pole beans, or the climbing variety, is capable of growing so much bigger producing much more beans, but does it slower and is at more risk to be attacked or sun-damaged! So plant both, always.

Carrots: I am still not great at carrots! There are many tricks to germinating them, and I always try to sow them early in the spring, then again in the summer, and it will sometims have better results if you put a big plank over the soil after planting them, to keep them from drying out. They really need soft and well-fertilized soil. Also if you plant them in the fall, harvest before the late spring comes because they will start going to seed.

Onions and garlic: Honestly there's no effort in growing these, bulb stuff grows as long as its underground, it's more of a challenge to stop them from growing really. Even if you cut up the tops they'll regrow like some kind of zombies. Beware of onion fly tho that stuff is evil.

Sunflowers: Do Not Let the seeds fall around your garden, they Will take over your Entire Garden and you will be helpless as these monster plants devour your garden space while You feel too Guilty to tear the pretty flowers away from your space. Do Not be Deceived. That's exactly what they Want you To Think. Will stunt your beans if planted close so be careful. Zero effort in growing, will grow in any dirt.

Cabbage and Kale: They need so much fertilizing, or they will just stay sad and small, you have to give them compost, mulch, and water them with some sort of fertilizer tea (you can make that by mixing nettle with water and letting it sit in the sun for 10 days) or you will not get the gorgeous full plant that you want. Also they are frost hardy but if there's not much sun they won't grow very fast in the cold.

Leek: they do not tolerate being grown inside as seedlings, but if you direct sow them every seed will come out I Swear. Can be grown in a bunch in one place then transplanted around later. Onion fly can also mess them up but I have no idea what to do about that.

Parsley and Celery: seems to do better direct-sown than transplanted, needs a lot of seeds to be thrown in order to germinate. I've never tried the root variety but leaf varieties grow very easy.

Potatoes: They're extremely easy to grow, as long as you put the potato underground you've done it, now if you want them to do amazing, you need to plant them in spring while the soil has a lot of water content in it, and you want to keep adding soil/mulch on top of them as they grow, in oder for them to grow more potatoes. I absolutely love growing them in mulch instead of soil! If you dig a hole, put a potato in it, then cover it in hay, or dry leaves, not only it will grow, but you won't have to dig out the potatoes, you can just feel them thru the mulch! 10/10 Love growing in mulch. They still spread their roots into the soil, but the potatoes itself have a good time growing in mulch because it creates no resistance to potatoes getting bigger underneath. Also they like having decent amount of water, if planted in hot times.

Green beans: You need to put 5-6 seeds in one place in order for them to do well, they like having more of their own kind around to create shade and stability, they get easily damaged by the sun so they appreciate being around each other and protecting each other. Bush varieties do best in my climate, but I'm longing for the evasive pole green bean plants, I want to see them tall one day.

Cucumbers: I've only grown this once and all I have to report is that it was very stubborn, grew in poor soil and with no care, kept creating cucumbers long after I've expected it to call it quits, sometimes they grow bitter and it takes a Ritual to make them edible, good for canning tho.

Peas: This is one thing I suck at so don't do what I did – don't take out seeds from hybrid varieties of peas and expect them to grow next year, they will germinate at abysmal rates. I finally bought some heirloom seeds so we will see if my luck changes.

Chives: Absolutely immortal, zombie plant, grows always except when frozen, grows like grass, loves being cut, unlimited onion seasoning exists and its chives, not as sweet as green onions sadly, but I appreciate it's properties of being an endless supply, a woman needs that sometimes.

Spinach and Swiss Chard: Idk if it's just me but I Never know when these are randomly going to go to seed and it drives me Insane. Cannot be relied upon because they all just loooove going to seed whenever sun hits them in a Way. Plant in fall to have some to eat in the spring for 2 weeks until they decide they're ditching you because sunlight now exists.

Basil: Oh, oh, don't get me started, I thought, originally, this plant needs lots of sunlight to succeed and it made Sense! I mean why Not! But then for several years they did badly..? And then, then I find out, basil grows better in Shade! I find this via youtube video randomly! Really?!?! I have planted the forsaken herb in the shade and I'm Watching its Every Move. It's doing fine for now we'll see tho. =_=

[reddiamondyeet]

Me: "Wow, I'm really not good at initiating communication. And the physical revulsion I feel at the idea of attempting to start a conversation with someone, even if I care about them, and how it feeds into my guilt complex, is something I really should talk to a professional about."

Me: "But instead I'm gonna make a song about it in my notes app."

[bon2bonn]

Weathering your Storm

° The winds are howling

With summer break around the corner , it's just one weekend . What could go wrong ?, Well........ , Seb , Lewis and Daniel are about to find out.

*The start of the 22!23! Grid!AU !

*requests and questions are open so don't be shy ! ✨

2022!F1 grid X female!driver!reader

Sebastian vettel , Daniel Ricciardo, Lewis Hamilton X female!driver!reader.

Words count : around 1.4k

Warnings : grammar, cursing,sad girl hours, mercedes slander(not really), McLaren, I'm missing up the timeline but it's fun , not proof read nor edited .

leaving the media pen brought y/n relief as she's finally able to stretch her legs and get some fresh air away from the bustling reporters asking the same questions over and over again and buzzing teams finishing interviews and packaging garages after the race .

She avoided her team's garage like a plague , having to witness as the engineers pushed her car back in was more than too much for her to handle , so she opted for walking around trying to clear her mind before it goes on to a spiral.

Spotting Sebastian's green team shirt alongside Lewis and chatting among themselves down the pit wall she made a beeline for them . "Hello gentlemen . seb, Lewie " she greats them cheerfully as she gave each one a hug as they congratulate her before settling back beside Seb as he nudged her shoulder teasing " p3 , not so bad huh? " causing her to smile bashfully at him , Lewis pumped his fist with her's " great driving out there " , "thank you " she said with a beaming smile " yeah those last 3 lap were from hell , Sainz almost got my ass " both looked amused at her ranting post race as she always dragged them to listen , not like they were complaining as they adored how she went on giving them her full review with them giving her input here and there .

after a while of catching up they noticed how uncharacteristically quite she got while looking around searching for something or rather someone but before they could ask she perked up as Danny barged over lifting her in a tight hug shaking her around while exclaiming loudly "demon spawn!" And she returned the hug letting out a loud "Ricky Martin!" The other just stood there used to their antics same as everyone around them as they love to tease (bully) eachother around the paddock .

She turned to Danny giving him a wide grin" you're right on time , I was about to send out searching party " he nudged her shoulder " awww , I didn't know you'd miss my charming personality and handsome face that much " she scoffed at him " as if " he stepped back hand on his heart dramatically whining " you've wounded my delicate heart !" That got him a kick in the shin from her before she grinned back at him " stop with you theatrics , I have a great idea , we should start our own F1 support group !" mildly amused he threw her a wide grin " I'm all in baby , but what for?" So she looked at the other two drivers maintaining her wide grin as she lowered her voice to avoid any preying ears "well , mainly for you , Mick and Seb , but I'll be needing it too . my lovely team pulled a McLaren because guess who's mercedes dropping during the summer break ? , to give you a hint it's not Lewis" .

The three of them stood still staring at her as if she'd grown a second head , Danny was the first to snap out laughing "nice one mate ! That Almost got me" after a moment of silence Sebastian signals to him and he immediately reached to cover her ears as he cursed loudly "that's fucking bullshit , why the fuck would they ?" As she just stood there waiting for him to finish , Lewis just stared at her bewildered " what do you mean they are dropping you ? They can't do that , you're competing for the championship in that tin can excuse of a car incase they've forgotten about the standings ! Hell ! We both got a contract till 24 _ 25 they can't just drop it".

she just shrugged " well , they sure can and already did so ....." Danny's eyes couldn't get wider "what?!" So she gave them a nonchalant hand wave "starting from tonight I'm officially an unemployed F1 driver , they bought my contract and sent me out the door" Lewis interrupted " but Toto...." Only for her to shake her head " he sat me down along with the team management , PR and legal team which explains why they were lurking around lately , and both my lawyer and Manager out of nowhere and went on about the team and the drivers , how the last two years were great for the team bonding building a solid foundation and all of the usual pe-race briefing no big deal right ? , He went on talking about my contract which was odd because I knew wouldn't be up till 24 at least with great possiblity of extension , and how I have a promising future in the sport but not with them and I honestly just zoned out after that ,up until they gave me an offer out of of guilt or pity I guess to drive for Williams alongside Albon " that got Danny's attention "what about Russell?" So she whispered to him to subtly hold both Lewis and seb back as they both were close to marching over mercedes demanding answers after her declaring " they finalized singing him today for the next three seasons so starting from SPA he'll be driving full time for mercedes , that's net even the worst part , apparently they were discussing the position since the beginning of the previous season but they wanted me out with the least PR damages so now is the best chance to do so after most teams got their seats confirmed for next season so here I am " .

"Wait so you're telling me that everyone knew except us ? " she shrugged "pretty much, yeah " , "bono?" , " He knew" , " sussie?" , "Nodding "yup" , "James?" , "Uhuh , he was all in for the change" , "fucking hell!", "Exactly" she shrugged " they even decided they won't even announce any of it till Spa " . Daniel whistled in astonishment " wait until Nando hear about this " causing them to grimace only thinking what he'd possibly do " oh he already know ! Found him this morning cornering Toto in the garage , don't know what he said but by the time I got him he was done , talking about too many witnesses " , that got seb to realize as he voiced out concerned " that's why he seemed so cryptic , well more than usual, he asked me to get ready to head out to Brackley headquarters for some urgent business had to talk him out of it " she snorted" Don't be so sure , He asked me to join too right before quali so I reckon that talk didn't do much , Kimi is in it too so .... Yeah ".

Silence overtook them as their somber faces took her demeanor in , her now fidgeting fingers , tense shoulders , and strained smile , seb stepped up giving her a tight hug whispering " are you okay?" And she reciprocated with a strained voice " yeah , it's just didn't hit me yet so I would give it two to three days to fully set in but right now, everything is shitty and I want to cry but I'm too angry to cry so now I'm hungry , I want ice cream ". That earned her a sympathetic smile from Lewis as he pulled her next " I known darling , let's grab our things and I promise you we'll get you as much of ice cream as you want okay? ", " Okay , but I'm not going there , I can't , they're taking down my name and number off of everything" she let out with a small voice as he sighed heavily "already!? They couldn't wait?" Shaking his head while heading up to their drivers rooms .

Danny put his arm around her shoulders swaying them as he reminded " it might be so shitty and as bad as it seems , but we've got you okay? You'll find us there whenever you need us , you're stuck with us for good , and if you wanna burn down you know what , you know where ........." Seb snapped. " no one is burning anything!" Only for him to carry on pretending to whisper " we won't tell him " causing her to let a loud giggles at how serious Daniel was and how seb was trying to tell him off of it ." Just know you won't be alone in this".

[woso-fan13]

Whumptober 2023: 15 (Barca)

No. 15: “I don’t need you to help me, I can handle things myself.”

Makeshift Bandages | Suppressed Suffering | “I’m fine.”

It was so easy to hide. Although you were usually relatively active on social media, you had a backlog of photos that you wanted to post. Nobody noticed that you were posting photos from previous months, and, if they did, nobody cared. 

You had mastered the art of ignoring a phone call and texting the person back after a few minutes apologizing for missing their call. Your teammates knew that you lived on a random schedule, it wasn’t hard to convince them that you actually had completely missed the dozen calls that you had received that day. You hadn’t, watching your phone screen, waiting for the call to go to voicemail every time. 

You called out of practice for the week, insisting that you were sick. Once this week had passed, there were a few scheduled days off. You could take almost two weeks to try and regain control over yourself. You were spiraling, but no one could know. No one would know. 

—-

A persistent knock grabs your attention. You had previously been zoned out in the living room for an undetermined amount of time. You try to ignore the sound and go back into your haze, but the pounding repeats. Again and again. 

Finally, you pull yourself up from the floor, making your way to the door. Expecting a delivery that needs to be signed for or a salesperson, you open the door without looking through the peephole. 

That was a mistake. A very mad Lucy Bronze is standing, hands on her hips. 

“Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N,” she says sternly, “where have you been? The whole team’s been worried about you, you’ve been ignoring us.”

You don’t respond, staring down at the floor in the doorway. Lucy grows more impatient. 

“I’m waiting. You better have a bloody good explanation, young lady.”

“I’m sorry.”

It's barely a whisper. It’s all you can say, but you know it won’t satisfy her. 

“You’re sorry?! You’re sorry?! No, you’re sorry when you hit someone with a football, or when you make a mistake. You’re not ‘sorry’ when you disappear. You’re not ‘sorry’ when you leave the team.”

Lucy is ranting at this point, her anger clear. Every ‘sorry’ she said was spit, mocking you harshly.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

Lucy heaves a sigh, breathing in deeply. She’s trying to control herself, you know it. You would understand if she kept yelling. She should keep yelling, you have let everyone down. That’s all you do- constantly disappointing people. 

It’s silent for a moment, Lucy refocusing. She looks at you for the first time, really looks at you. She sees the lack of colour in your face- your normally rosie cheeks drained to an almost translucent. She sees the dark circles under your eyes, begging for rest. She sees the red rims around your eyes, sees the dried tear tracks. She also sees the fresh tears pooling, likely a result of her harsh words. 

Oh. She feels like a terrible bully. 

“Y/N, kiddo, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean any of that, I was just scared. No one’s heard from you in over a week, we were all worried. I shouldn’t have shouted, I’m sorry.”

You shrug, whispering, “it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not,” she says firmly before lowering her voice to just above a whisper and repeating, “it’s not okay.”

Silence fills the air, neither of you know what to say. Lucy’s deciding how to best convince you to let her in, you’re deciding if it would be more effective to talk Lucy into leaving or to simply slam the door and lock it quickly. You’re leaning towards the second option. 

“Can I come in?” she asks. 

Every part of you is screaming not to let her in. Every part of you is screaming that if you let her in, she’s going to find out everything. Every part of you is screaming that if you let her in and she finds out the truth, she’ll leave you. 

And, yet, you nod. You step aside, letting her in. 

She smiles softly, stepping forward. She waits until you shut the door and turn to head back into the main area, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. She pulls you tight to her side, the touch firm. 

The two of you walk to the living room, settling on the sofa. It’s quiet again, the silence suffocating. But neither of you can say a word. 

“I’m okay,” you insist, knowing that’s what she needs to hear, “I can handle things myself. You should go.”

That was good. Maybe she would leave, walk right out the door. Maybe, maybe, if she walked out now, she could walk back in later. If she stayed, she would walk out and stay away. 

Lucy looks closely at you, as if trying to read you. 

“You’re not okay.”

You go to insist that you’re fine, but as your mouth opens, you’re cut off. 

“You’re not okay.”

And something, somewhere breaks. You throw towards Lucy, tears already dripping off of your face. You bury your head into her chest, your breath stuttering. She doesn’t know what to do. 

“That’s it, get it all out,” she says. 

She pulls you to be sitting in her lap, facing her as she hugs your body tightly. Your head is pressed into her neck, the skin instantly turning wet. 

“Good, get it all out. Nice, deep breaths. Good girl, big breaths. Keep taking those nice, big breaths. You’re going to be okay, everything’s going to be okay. I’m right here, sweetheart, I’m not going anywhere.”

She continues speaking quietly to you, the words soothing. One of her hands is cradling the back of your head, the other running firmly up and down your back. The pressure helps calm you, and Lucy knows this. It’s also the reason that her cheek is pressed to the top of your head, grounding you. 

Lucy knows you. And Lucy’s here. She’s not going anywhere, firmly connected to you now. 

[writinginthetwilight]

It started on the stairs - Part 3.

Eddie Munson x Awkward! Neighbour! Reader

Chapter warnings: strong language, shit parents, idiots in love, pining, fem reader, awkwardness, fluff, slight angst.

Author note: Thank you so much for love on the last chapter it means the world, this is the last part and I really wanted to get it out on Christmas but it wasn't meant to be. I hope you all had a lovely day celebrating if you do and a lovely day in general if you don't. Enjoy.

Part 1 Part 2 Masterlist

As December crawls in your anxiety around Eddie has dimmed to a low murmur, used to the flirty quips by now or the way he would pull your feet into his lap as you watched TV. It still makes your body heat and butterflies erupt inside you but it was just Eddie. Touchy feely and flirty Eddie.

You had been so sure that something was going to happen at least a dozen times, but it never did, like when he came back after Thanksgiving.

Spotting you on the street outside your building he'd dropped his duffle bag and crushed you in a hug so tight that it made you let out a squeak into his chest as he laughed into your hair. It had turned silent as neither of you seemingly wanted to let go only for him to break it first apologising and hiding behind his hair before quickly saying he needed to get unpacked. Leaving you wide eyed and breathless.

So you shoved down the longing, kept it tidied away in the centre of your chest for when you were alone and watching romcoms or twisted in your sheets at night.

As Christmas hurtled towards you, you'd felt an odd sense of relief as you made plans to head home. Something to get excited about, people who you hadn't seen in almost a year, something familiar. That's not to say most of the lead up was spent without the metal head.

Eddie's feelings towards Christmas were made readily apparent as December wore on. He didn't hate the holidays he had stressed, just the whole ‘bullshit fake happy commercial aspect of it’.

Spiralling off into a rant as you looked down at him from the top of a ladder while he passed you gaudy foil streamers for you to hang, you nodded along pausing once you were finished to take in the tinsel and glittery lights that adorned every corner. Holding back laughter as he looked at you fumbling his words, he didn't begrudge anyone else's joy, he just wouldn't be participating.

But days later as you stared out over the city, kaleidoscopic lights glittering in windows and over rooftops, silent tears ran down your face and you weren't sure you would be participating in that joy either.

You weren't going home.

Your mom had called just a half hour earlier, excitedly explaining they were going to Hawaii, and told you to book a flight, like you didn't work for minimum wage barely managing to scrape by. You'd spluttered and explained that you couldn't, you had already spent a relatively small fortune on presents and only had enough left to make the drive home. Besides Christmas was in two weeks, indignation rising you'd asked when they were going to tell you.

All syrupy sweet faux sincerity she reminded you it was you who had chosen to move so far away. You could hear your dad arguing in the background asking to speak to you as your mother hissed about how they weren't buying your ticket. You didn't want to hear it. Told them it was fine you'd had so many offers anyway, that it would save you the gas bill. To have a great time.

And thats how Eddie found you, knocking on your door joint and snacks ready bouncing on the balls of his feet. Feeling the air leave him as you open the door.

“There she is.” he breathes as you silently throw out an arm to let him in. Your room smells of candles and clean washing, it makes him heady, he doesn't notice the lack of decorations lining the walls or the missing shades your string lights would be casting around the room.

“So I got jerky.” He says walking into your small narrow kitchen and unloading snacks “Before you say it, I'll sit on the floor when I eat it so you don't have to gag and make a scene” he turns and you give him a smile that doesn't reach your eyes and a bite of panic immediately spreads through him.

“Hey you okay?” you dip your head but he can see the puffiness around your eyes and you scrunch your nose turning away from him.

“ I'm fine”, he notices then your naked Christmas tree in the corner and the string lights that have been unplugged and he rounds you quickly, you won't look at him.

“y/n?” he leans into you trying to catch your eye and you curl in slightly. You hadn't moved away from him like that in months before he had learnt that he was clearly a little much for you. He takes a step back, eyes darting over you.

Your shoulders sag and his heart aches when you finally look up at him, sighing heavily as you walk your way over to the couch, curling your knees up by your chin.

“I'm not going home for Christmas, it’s stupid. Barely anyone's there anymore but I don't know.”

He sits down gingerly next to you, arm over the back of the sofa head laying heavy on it, watching your profile as you sit glassy eyed. He wants to pull you into him, reach out and run his hand over your cheek. But he doesn't, instead he concentrates on the way his knee is pressing into the meat of your thigh close enough without scaring you.

“Not stupid, you could still head back?”

You pick at the hole in your sweats and shrug, “I told them I had plans, made a big deal of it”

“Do you?”

You give him a deadpan stare and he can't help the way it makes his lip quirk up, you lean over and take the joint sticking out from behind his ear, lighting it and letting out a plume of smoke as you let your head slump back

“It will be fine, I'll drink wine and watch TV” You look over to him and he gives you a grimace. The throw pillow hits him square in the face, and he collapses back dramatically in an attempt to see you smile. When he peeks back up you're still just staring up.

Just say it, just say it come on Munson just fucking say it.

“Well, I mean, I'll be here” he sways forward and your head tips lazily towards him.

“I thought you were heading back?”

He adjusts sitting a little closer to you, plucking the joint from your fingers and taking a hit, smoke sneaking out the edges of his mouth as he talks “Get a bonus if I work at the shop Christmas Eve and the day after, can't really pass it up.” it's not a lie, he just hadn't wanted to see that sad face you'd pull if he told you he was spending it alone.

“Whatya say? Won't be a three course meal or anything, but fancy slumming it with me?”

The grin you give him makes all the air leave his lungs and fuck hell never go back to Hawkins again if it will keep you looking at him like that.

You spend the night talking over plans, food, drink, films and old traditions you could try. Reminiscing on the rose-tinted memories that only childhood can provide. Calling it a night when those stories of nostalgia fade into heavier ones that have stuck to your adult bones.

The following two weeks go past in a blur, long shifts tending to increasingly stressed out customers and nights spent pouring over Eddie's present sitting on your living room floor surrounded by craft materials.

Your schedules had fallen out of sync, as you picked up extra shifts and he worked late into the evening. The one night he'd come over to hang out you'd turned to find him crashed out on the couch before you could even ask if he wanted to order food. Waking him as gently as you could, that tidy place in your chest yawned open as he lazily blinked at you with a sleepy smile on his face and you reluctantly cut the night short.

You missed him.

So as your Christmas Eve shift ends you practically sprint home, spending the evening elbow deep in pie mix and sugar cookie dough, putting the finishing touches to his present before finally crawling into bed. Flour in your hair and sugar cookie dough stuck under your nails as you drift unconscious, bone tired.

It meant you woke on Christmas day a little later than you planned, flustered you spent an inordinate amount of time getting ready. Wriggling in and then out of pantyhose and tops that show a lot more cleavage than your usual movie night attire, until every surface in your room is covered in rejected items. You finally relent, pulling out the soft cream jumper adorned with snowflakes you had been living in for the past few weeks, leggings and a cheap felt santa hat that barely squeezes over your head.

At his door, balancing a pie and a tray of cookies in your hands, with bags that clink hanging around your wrists you're relieved at your choice as he opens the door. Dressed in red plaid pyjama bottoms and a blue cable knit sweater he looks like he could be on a Christmas card besides the halo of dark hair, and you both laugh at the sight of each other. He flicks the bell on the end of your hat before grabbing the bags from you and leading you inside.

You stop within a few steps, awe struck by the sight of multicoloured lights and plastic foliage lining the walls, you walk without a word towards them, a mixture of nails, hooks and scotch tape holding them up and your eyes prickle at the sight of the small tree sparsely decorated with mismatched baubles on the kitchen counter.

“What's this?” You say spinning to face him, he just shrugs from his place in the kitchenette, rocking from foot to foot. “You took yours down.”

You stride up to him wrapping your arms around his neck, and you feel his arms squeeze around you. “It's not much, my friend Robin dropped in and helped.”

“ Thank you.”

There's that pause again, and your the one to break it this time, rubbing at your eyes and peeling off the saran wrap off a plate of cookies, “As requested vanilla and the tiny silver balls that hurt your teeth”

You spend the day eating dessert, and the best mac and cheese you've had in your life, drinking homemade Irish cream with too much whiskey all in front of the TV. It’s cosy, slowly drifting closer together to the centre of the couch with every bathroom break or refill, eventually, he sits and drops a present in your lap. Shiny gold paper and so much tape you struggle to open it, Eddie eventually getting impatient and going to retrieve a pair of scissors in the end.

“No!?” You say as you finally see the cover, it's leather bound with indentations of characters and trees ‘Grimms fairy tales’, you laugh, grinning like a fool remembering your rant about their stories relevance to modern horror, on that first Halloween night you'd spent together.

“I love it. Thank you,” You lean over to hug him, the couch dipping as gravity presses you into him. He smells of that spiced aftershave and coconut shampoo, it makes your tipsy brain dizzy.

“Okay my turn” you say shake evident in your voice as you hand over the neatly wrapped present, he takes his time unwrapping and as it appears you can see the confusion on his face until he finally sees the hellfire logo, looking at you quickly before hastily ripping the rest of the wrapping away.

You had painted it with silvers and blacks to look like a wrought iron gate with the helfire logo at the centre and almost lost your mind papermarcheing it to make the details raised, the fact that you ever had the patience for this as a child is mind-boggling.

He looks up as you sit chewing your thumb.

“Is this?” He unlatched the buckle which closes it, opening the DM screen fully, pockets clips and appearing.

“Do you like it?”

“Do I like it? Did you make this?”

“Yeah, I mean it's just, paper mache” you laugh “There's that place you like with the paint for your models and I went to look and thought maybe I could buy something but nothing seemed” You shook your head, swallowing the lump in your throat at the way you were about to gush about him.

“This is fucking awesome”

“Yeah?” You grin, popping a flap so a felt box unfolds. “I thought you could roll here", you can feel him watching you as you explain each pouch and flap, his eyes never leaving your face.

“I feel bad about the book now, shit” he's so close you can feel the breath on your face.

“Shut up.” your hand runs down the embossed cover. “It's perfect.”

When you look at him he looks like he's about to say something but instead reaches for the pile of movies holding up Scrooged “Fancy a bit of Bill Murrey?”

The day dwindles into the night, food and drink runs dry and you can feel your eyes getting heavy as 1 am approaches.

When you say you need to leave it's a slow-moving departure, the silence loud as you collect your things.

“Thank you for today.”

He waves you off, “I just threw up some plastic and made” he glances up and suddenly looks flustered “Pasta, you did most of the work” his words are quick and he's moving you through the door before you can see what it is.

“Oh okay, I'll see you Tuesday?”He nods and you lean in for a hug when something hits you in the face. You jump apart squealing and brushing yourself down scared whatever it was is still on you.

Eddie's eyes are cartoonishly wide as he stares at the offending item which now lies limply on the floor, you lean down to see a small sprig of plastic mistletoe lying there and pick it up, when you look at him he's still staring at it in your hand, face rapidly turning pink before looking at you.

“Huh, shit yeah that's, my friend Robin. You've met Robin. She helped me decorate, I said that right? And we got a shit tonne of stuff and it was in the bag and its meant to hang somewhere I said it was creepy but she said it wasn't, but the only other door was the bathroom and that's fucking weird so I put up here and it was the end of the tape with that weird cardboard bit on and it obviously didn't hold.”

He's red in the face gesticulating wildly, throwing his arm out and you can't help the amusement in your face as you touch it against his chest, halting his rambling, a long exhale leaving him.

He squeezes his eyes closed, taking it with a nod.

You watch him look down to the mistletoe, an angry little frown on his stupidly pretty face, and you were moving before you gave yourself a chance to back out.

Hand on his cheek moving his head and catching his lips softly. Your heart pounds in your chest, palms clammy against the slight stubble of his cheek and, he's not kissing you back. Reality slows for a beat too long so you pull away. His eyes are wide and he's just looking at you. You feel sick and are fumbling away to grab your bags as quickly as you can.

“I'm sorry, that was, the mistletoe and I just thought, it was stupid, not that kissing you would be. But I. ”

You don't see his chest heaving, fist closed so hard around the mistletoe it's leaving an indent in his palms because you're quite literally running away from him down the dark red hallway, heartbeat pounding in your ears, tears stinging your eyes and blurring your vision as you reach the stairs and, your pulled back.

Stumbling, large hands turn you around and he's there, cupping your face as he kisses you. Eyes scrunched closed and teeth knocking, noses pressed awkwardly together and you gasp clinging to his shirt.

You find your balance again and rearrange, the puzzle pieces finding the nooks where they fit as you kiss him back, lips moving quickly against each other as you find your rhythm. His arm drops around you to pull you in and you feel like you're about to burst and be carried away through the air vents.

When your hands come up to grip his hair he lets out a strangled sound from his throat and pulls away panting. It's silent as you look at each other's faces, breath mingling from kiss swollen lips as his thumb traces your cheekbone, you're sure your knees are going to give out at any moment.

You jump as a loud cough comes from behind you, both turning your heads to see an irritated man standing on the steps below. You step out of the way, Eddie's hand still firm between your shoulder blades keeping you pressed to his side as he throws an arm out to wave the man past.

His face comes down to yours again before the man has even cleared the hall.

“Can I keep kissing you?” it's almost urgent the way he says it and you nod quickly. “Thank fuck.” his mouth captures yours again softer and slower this time and you smile into it.

“Shit” he murmurs against your lips and you can't help the laugh that bubbles out of your chest breaking you apart again “Merry Christmas Eddie”, he bites his lip before kissing you firmly once leaving you giggling “Merry Christmas sweetheart.”

[seawater-aurelia-writing]

Broken { The Break; Chapter 2}

Pairing(s): Fem!MC/Yuu/Reader x TBD

Summary: MC awakens after her fall but the reactions of others make her spiral worse - but not all is as it seems.

WARNINGS

I am not the best at labeling warnings or triggers but I can say that this story is laden with neglect, self-depreciation, self-neglect, anxiety, possible depression and attempts to justify the above. There could be more labels that I can add but i’m unsure how to word them - so please exercise caution.

I liiiiiiiiiiiive! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ I restarted this SO many times and yet I could never get it to feel...'right'...So I hope this lives up to yall's expectations! Sorry for the bad summary lol

One last disclaimer though! I have not seen the entirety of Chapter 6 and I have avoided pretty much all content for Chapter 7 as far as i'm aware. So I may not have everyone exactly in character in new things were revealed for them.

When M/C awoke, she half expected to be in the infirmary as she was when she was knocked unconscious during the Magift Tournament. But the other half of her? 

She didn’t expect much. Be it the stillness of the void around her, or the library floor if Professor Trein left her where she fell – there wouldn’t be much difference. It's what usually happened anyway; She could handle her injuries herself if that was the case. However, she supposed there was some form of upside to being in the infirmary. 

If she was left in the void, how else would she know firsthand how she burdened and upset those around her.

‘It’s so late…’ She thought to herself, gazing out of the window across from her bed. She could barely make out the faintest shape of the moon – a crescent. Even the moon was smiling at just how pathetic she had to look at this moment.

“-C. M/C!” 

Why was it so hard for her to hear? Even as she turned her head slowly, moving her eyes to gaze up at the headmaster beside her, it was as if someone had placed her in a tub of mud. She moved so slowly, without much feeling other than a sharp pain as she tried to rest the side of her head down onto the pillow.

“…Hng..”

“Thank goodness, you’ve finally awoken! It’s been two days already! What on earth did you drink to cause you to create such an awful mess of the library?! You know very well that you cannot ...poultices as other students do because of ... Furthermore, I believe I ...use it for research not as ...a playground!” He ranted but his voice faded in and out as he spoke. But why? Why can't I hear him?

Only an idiot would zone out at a time like this.

Crowley sighed, clearly exasperated when she didn’t attempt to speak.

‘He hates that he let you stay here. Who can't do simple chores?He wishes he never helped you.’

“Once you are ...leave, you are to clean up ...the library. Luckily, ...the matter with you ...I can see.” He continued after a moment, his arms folding over his chest as he gazed down at her. Slowly, it became easier to focus but the ringing in her ears never  "Actually...Our nurse is ...but I see no reason ...release you myself."

“…Y-yes…sir.” She rasped, voice dry and hoarse from lack of use.How long had she been unconscious? But again, did it truly matter? But what did that matter? Clearly, the pain in her head wasn’t real and not a sign of something worse. Why should she expect something else?

'He wants you gone.'

'You're taking up space.'

'Stop being selfish.'

'Because you think you're worth more than you are.'

Ace, Deuce and Grim came to visit her that day at lunch just before her release but the visit felt hollow. They laughed and teased her for her clumsiness, even Deuce smiling a bit at the dramatics of Grim, but none seemed to notice the forced smile that M/C put on her face. None noticed how her eyes twitched at the sharp, spike of pain that formed when they grew louder. 

‘They’re only here because they’re forced to be. Stop thinking about yourself.’

'Just smile. Don't make a scene.'

When M/C had been released earlier that day, she was urged straight to attend the final class of that day rather than go straight to Ramshackle. 

‘Please let this go by fast…’ She thought to herself, letting Rook lead the way to their class as the pain in her head continued to grow. M/C closed her eyes for a moment, missing the way Rook glanced back at her and shifted his body to walk closer to her. 'Please...'

Yet it did not. 

MC felt as if she was on autopilot as she sat in class, sluggishly marking notes where needed and nodding along with the lecture but nothing seemed to sink in, no matter how many times she willed herself to focus in. Rook would boisterously comment on things, his voice jolting her to the present long enough for her to gaze at him and then the teacher before her focus waned once more.

‘You’re so needy.’ Why couldn’t she just move past her little incident? Everyone else already had moved past it, so it clearly wasn’t very important. She had no right to wish that others worry about her. They had bigger things to worry about, more important things to focus on.

Right?

‘Why can’t you handle this on your own?” Why couldn’t she? It was only one day just like the others! It wasn’t even hard! Ruggie had gone without meals more than she had! So obviously, she was just exaggerating. Vil had more things to worry about than she did including an actual career! What right did she have to complain about doing a few favors?

‘You’re pathetic.’

‘A waste of space.’

‘What good is someone who screws up a simple thing?’

‘No one cares.’

‘You’re replaceable.’

‘Forgettable.’

As class ended, MC prepared for her cycle to begin once more and so it did. Rather than go to  dinner, Kalim latched onto MC the moment she was out of the classroom. The pain in her head returned full force with his boisterous volume right beside her ear but she still smiled. 

He offered to help the next time she went to the library since he knew ladders were tricky. 

‘They aren’t tricky. He’s pitying you’

“Kalim, leave her alone. She needs to rest.” Jamil finally said after a few minutes, his eyes not leaving her  as he spoke. He almost seemed to study her before adding, “She isn’t looking well.”

‘Pathetic.’

“Huh,? Oh right! I’m sorry! Go, go rest up! We can plan a group dinner later!” Kalim practically beamed before ushering her away from the cafeteria despite Grim’s many protests and her own stumbling feet.

“B-But -” 

 But they were already on Main Street by the time MC attempted to speak. Why was she always so hesitant when it came to these things? She barely uttered a word in the entire conversation and despite Jamil’s eyes on her, it was as if she wasn’t really a part of the conversation. Just a figure meant to listen but not contribute. 

Always there but never meant to fully be there.

MC didn’t register her body moving as she went towards the direction of Ramshackle, her form practically shrinking in on itself as they went. Grimm was rambling on and on as he floated beside her, while she let her body guide her on a path she had now memorized. 

“…Just…pathetic…” She mumbled, one hand coming up to grasp at the other elbow. That’s what she was, wasn’t she? She didn’t stand out other than being magicless but even then people seemed to forget. No one cared that she couldn’t magically make a situation better, but they expected her to do it anyway. Just like no one seemed to care about her wellbeing but they expected her to always be okay. Thoughts of Riddle, Leona, Azul, Kalim, and Vil drifted into her mind - how each of them experienced their own breaks during the Overblots, how they opened up about what hurt them, how everyone listened and tried to help them. She thought about how Crowley actually brought in special healers and therapists just for them for weeks after their incidents and how they still have check-ins with him to ensure they’re on the right track. 

Where was that for her? Her body couldn’t produce magic, she couldn’t  Overblot to make others realize how badly she was hurt mentally, physically, emotionally. She couldn’t voice her worries because who would listen? Even when she tried to warn her friends about the smallest of dangers, they simply brushed her off. Her words didn’t matter; so why would her thoughts matter.

‘Is that it?’ She wondered, a sudden cold feeling filling her form. What if she truly was the issue? Why was she so focused on having her thoughts and feelings acknowledged when she knew that all others wanted was for her to help them? They are all more important than her pathetic emotions, right? They have a life and future here in their world and it’s clear she’s just an anomaly who may never return to where she was once from. Was she - overvaluing herself? Was it all-

“It’s your fault, you know!” Grimm yelled suddenly, directly in front of her.

MC stopped suddenly, a cold chill rushing through her body at the words. Her fingernails slowly began digging into her skin as she looked into Grim’s eyes. “W-what?”

“It’s your fault!! You know, I had to do cleaning duty!” He complained, his little paws resting on his hips as he scowled. “I wanted to pick up some of that discount tuna before Ruggie got all of it but I was roped into cleaning! Not to mention those creepy twins came at me about something you forgot! And you forgot the library today! I'm not cleaning that just because you're lazy and took a fall! You’re my henchman, not the other way around! Don’t be selfish! ”

M/C this. M/C that. Clean the weeds. Fetch my things. Deliver this. Talk to this person. Clean this, clean that. Keeping busy, always busy.

'It's for the best. They have other things to focus on-'

She stopped walking, her head hurting more and more, as if a little thing was smashing cauldrons over and over against her brain. Her heart joined the rhymed pounding so hard, she gripped her chest in a vain attempt to calm it.

"Stop-" She gasped but couldn't say more as she stepped back, her throat clenching.

'They are more important. Don't deny it'

'They will never care about you.'

'You don't belong here.'

“I know as the Great Magician that I am, that I need to carry the both of us since you're useless without magic but you need to watch it with the - huh? MC?!” Grimm continued, his tone shifting to something MC didn’t want to hear – something she couldn’t hear.

She backed away, one step and then two before rushing off towards the entrance gates of the College. Not once looking back.

Her surroundings blurred as she ran, not taking into account where she was truly going - just knowing that she had to get away, far away. From the Grim, from all of the others, from Night Raven College, from everything.She just wanted it all to go away!

'Useless.'

'Magicless.'

‘Selfish’

"Stop! Stop it!" She sobbed, her breath catching in her throat. Her chest began to hurt more than her head caused her to stagger in her stride. M/C felt herself tumble down and crash down a slope, the brush scratching her as she went down before she hit something hard and frigid. 

She sobbed as the thoughts continued to repeat in her head; Every overblot, every chore, every demand, every reprimand, every expectation, and every sign of disappointment. Why was she truly like this? She wasn’t good for anything but menial tasks due to her lack of magic and still she can’t do any of that right. 

“Make it stop, make it stop, makeitstop…”

She didn’t know how long she laid there, nor how long she was sobbing, begging and screaming for the pain to go away, for the thoughts to go away. The pain in her head only grew the more she cried, and as it grew  - so did that pain and tightness in her chest.

‘Useless.’

‘Useless!’

‘USELE-’

Until the darkness took her under again.

But unlike before - the chill of the darkness grew stronger and more intense until it was the only thing she was able to feel. Just as the voices were the only thing she was able to hear. Repeating their words over and over, in a hell that she couldn’t wake up from.

After what seems like ages, a gradual warmth began to seep into  the darkness around her. A spreading, far reaching feeling spreading across her body but oddly focused around her back and under her legs. 

‘What is…’ She wondered as another sensation came to her slowly, a rocking kind of motion accompanied by a lightness. It reminded her of the gentle swaying of the waves of Coral Sea but was swiftly ruined by the sound of harsh thunder reigniting the pain in her head. A flash of brilliant light flashed across her eyelids, causing her to whimper.

“Are…-ake, dear?” A familiar, deep voice crooned, not loud enough to hurt her head any further but enough for her to hear it clearly.

‘This voice…I know it…I..Why is he-’

‘You’re wasting his time.’

“Shhh, your heart…racing again. You…it’s Lillia…Focus on my breathing, little one.” Lillia’s voice soothed, as the rocking motion slowed - was she being carried? M/C registered the warmth tightening around her slightly as her breath quickened unintentionally.  “Shhh, focus…. You can do it. Think of nothing else but my voice and deep breaths.”

It took what felt like ages before M/C was able to focus on the steady rise and fall of her head in time with Lillia’s breathing. The ache in her chest lightened but the pain in her head did not, only worsening as she attempted to open her eyes. Another flash of lightning, red eyes and furrowed brows.

“It’s best if your eyes remain closed. The storm will only worsen the pain of your concussion.” Lillia remarked, just before more thunder rumbled. “ You worried us all, dear. Especially dear Malleus.”

“C-concussion? B-but I…don’t have a-” She mumbled, turning her head to hide from the storm before a thought flashed through her mind. “T-The library! I didn’t clean i-”

“You will not be cleaning anything nor doing any chores for the foreseeable future, little one.” Lillia cut her off quickly, his soft voice containing a firmer tone than she was used to hearing. “You are injured and have been pushing yourself too hard. Far harder than you should have.”

‘He knows you can’t do it. That’s why he said that.’

‘He knows you’re pathetic.’

“No, n-no I’m not. It’s fine. If anything I need to push harder, heh.” She forced out a laugh, attempting to lighten the atmosphere but Lillia merely sighed.  “I-It’s nothing really!”

“You’ve barely been eating, little one. Silver told me as such and I witnessed it myself; We were going to ensure you ate this evening but you didn’t show. In addition, you’ve been having more accidents than usual and have been unfocused. You. Are.Exhausted.”

“No, it’s fine. I just, if I just finish this one thing then it’s fine. I-I can clean the library super fast and it’s all okay!” She pressed, fighting the urge to cry once more. Had her screw ups been that apparent? She didn’t mean to; She was doing her best!

“But it’s never just one thing, is it?” M/C faintly registered the sound of his shoes upon cobblestone, were they back on campus?  “After this, then there’s another favor that’s asked of you, another assignment, another mess to clean. But – have you had time for yourself, little one?”

“…I-I do at night I have-“ The words trailed off as she tried to think of something. She did have time to herself at night but it was never for long, especially when her thoughts would become so loud or she would get those odd dreams of things she swears she’s seen but can’t fully remember. 

“But you live with Grim,yes? Who boasts about how tidy you keep your shared room…so I can only wonder how much alone time you get in there at all.” He hummed,and for a brief moment MC felt the brush of something soft and silken brush her face. Lilia seemed to shift slightly, curling into her  before the gently swaying became an airy sensation, like she was adrift but his warmth continued to steady her.

“…”

“And let us not forget that Malleus often takes his nightly walks in your area; Often alongside you, yes?  He’s told us that he’s seen lights on in Ramshackle as late as the early morning hours even after he’s escorted you home.”

“Ramshackle…isn’t my home.” She mumbled, her eyes growing hot and tears welled within. “This isn’t my home, I don’t belong and that’s why this doesn’t matter. I don’t know why you’re wasting your time with me; you have better things-”

“Do you know what’s the scariest thing in the world?”

“Huh?”

Lilia’s voice was low as he continued to speak, “Asking for help. You have to open yourself up and admit to yourself and someone else that you need help. That you need someone there to help you stand until you get your footing once again. There’s not many people who can open themselves up to doing that. Magically inclined or not.”

MC thinks of everyone who asks her for help. “No one seems to have that issue here…”

“They do love to ask you for things but not for those matters that are oh-so  troubling to them. Most would rather keep to themselves and allow their thoughts to consume them before they incite their pleas. Does that sound familiar?”

MC bit her lip, her eyes opening partially as her tears finally began to fall. She vaguely noticed the dim setting around them, but nothing was truly familiar as her tears blurred her sight. “All of you already have so much to worry about and futures to plan and…it’s just…better if I don’t ask.”

“And what, praytell, about your future, little one?” Lilia pressed as MC shakily used her hands to wipe her tears away.

“I…don’t think I have one. I don’t have magic so I can’t really….. I’m a magic-less student in a magically-based academy – how am I even going to use what I’m being taught? I’m just pathetic and worthless-.”

“Enough. I refuse to listen to you slander yourself in such a way, Child of Man.”

MC tensed as Malleus’s voice rang out firm from somewhere in front of Lilia and herself. She slowly parted her fingers, blinking so as to get a clear peek between them but quickly came to wish she hadn’t. She wished she could go back to that unknown area where Lilia had taken her from and just melt there where she wouldn’t have to deal with what was in front of her and the implications it all held.

Standing before her, in the main room of Ramshackle Dorm, were the Dorm Leaders , Grim and Sam with various expressions across their faces. -----------------------------taglist-------------------------------

@mamushroomoracorn | @sailor-pom | @secondb0rn | @honey-deerling-oc | @valerieelizablack | @hanafubukki |@houseoftitans | @butterscotch-babie | @thai | @alextheknight707 | @starshiningsirius | @vanrougette | @valerieelizablack | @cherrysamasama | @over-active-daydreamer | @tanspostsblog | @pineapple-coco | @silvsilvysilver | @diu0sanr | @amoresdarlene | @alankorex | @thehomosexualsupportingcast | @formerstands | @yourunsearc | @twst-rui | @StarryOne23

[starryskyzx]

𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫-𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐫𝐬

✽ 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝗼 𝘅 𝗷𝘂𝗷𝗶𝘁𝘀𝘂 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗰𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗿!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿, 𝗴𝗼𝗷𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗱

✽ 𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗸𝗲𝗻 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗰𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗿𝘀. 𝗵𝗼𝘄𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿, 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝘄𝗼 𝗺𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝗮𝗴𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝟭𝟬 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀 𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.

✽ 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁, 𝗱𝗲𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻, 𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵, 𝗰𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘆𝗮𝗹 (𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗮)

✽ 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 𝟮.𝟳𝗸

✽ 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧’𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚: 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲𝘀 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗔𝗙𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗯𝗮𝗿𝗮’𝘀 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝘀 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝗼’𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘆𝘂𝗸𝗶! 𝗼𝗸 𝗯𝘆𝗲, 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗻 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴.

You were already fighting a depressive episode when you had just heard the news about Haibara. When you saw him leave for his mission earlier that day, you never would’ve thought it’d be the last day of your classmates life. He was gone. Dead and never coming back. And you all just had to deal with it.

It was burden on top of burden. Doubt on top of doubt. It felt like you were spiraling every time you opened you eyes. You didn’t know what to do or who to talk to. You were lost in the darkness with no light. You were stuck.

You stumbled down the hallway, looking to grab one of your comfort drinks from the vending machine. There you saw Suguru, another one of your classmates, sitting on a bench drinking a Coke, staring off into space.

“Hey,” you mumbled taking a small glance at him, noticing how the dark circles engulfed the shape of his eyes the same way yours did. “Hey, y/n” Suguru muttered, following the reply with a small sigh.

There was a moment of silence between you two, filled with nothing but the sound of your choice of drink hitting the bottom of the machine. Although both of you were hesitant to ask, the silence was eventually broken after the same question had rolled off both of your tongues in unison.

“You okay?”

“Are you okay?”

Nervous laughs from both of you filled the air before you decided to reply to the question. “Yea, I’m fine. Just tired” you said, allowing a fake smile to grow onto your face to deflect from the lie you’d just told.

“Tuh, yea same” Suguru replied, following your lead by also pretending that everything was fine. As you palmed your drink, you reluctantly plopped down next to him.

The two of you sat in silence once more, both lost in thought about what issues the other was going through. That was until-

“I don’t think I want to be a sorcerer anymore”

was blurted from your mouth. “Huh?” Suguru said, letting his head turn quicker than any other moment during this whole interaction. “I don’t want to die like this, Suguru. I don’t want anyone to die anymore.”

“Is this about Haibara?”

“No-“ you exclaimed, taking a deep breath and continuing your explanation. “I’ve had these thoughts for a while now. I want to grow old. Maybe have a family.”

“I’m not as strong as you or Gojo, Suguru. I might not be as lucky and come back from the dead like you guys did.”

Every word that fell from your lips felt like a pound off your shoulder. However, when Suguru became a little too silent, you thought maybe you’d said too much.

Before you could throw out multiple apologies for your unsolicited rant, you heard Suguru’s voice from the other side of the bench.

“I always thought jujutsu sorcery existed to protect non-sorcerers, but lately the value of non-sorcerers has been wavering in my mind.”

You continued to listen to him ramble on and took in every word that came from his lips as they were all relatable to you on a personal level. Even as he went on to talk about the weak and how he’s been seeing regular civilians different recently, you made sure to stay attentive to him. That was until eventually he said something that specifically caught your attention.

“There's a part of me that despises non-sorcerers, and a part of me that wants to reject that part.

Although you and Suguru’s reasons held different undertones, it was as if for once, someone got you, even if your jealousy filled, envious hatred wasn’t truly the same as Suguru’s annoyance and distaste for the weak.

“Well… sadly for us, we can’t just stay in the middle. Eventually we’ll have to choose which path to take. A route of hate or a route of sorcery” you said pointing one hand to the hallway on your left and the other pointing to the one straight ahead. You placed your hands back by your side, gently closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. “Or maybe-“

“We could run away together”

His head turned your direction, eyes widened as a small “Huh?” came from his mouth. “We could just forget about everything, you know? We’d just leave this place without telling anyone.”

“We’d make our own path, Suguru.”

The shocked look on his face softened as the corners of his mouth became upturned.

“Hm. Sounds ideal, doesn’t it?” he said, chugging down the rest of his cola, crushing the can between his hands before getting up from the bench.

You stared at him for what felt like an eternity, waiting for a reply or a response of any sort at all. It wasn’t really obvious what he was thinking. Did he like the idea? Did he hate it? However, after tossing his trash, he simply continued on down the hallway silently.

You lowered your head, shaming yourself after getting hit by a wave of embarrassment. “Hey, y/n?” Suguru called out freezing in his tracks, turning his head slightly to look back at you who’s eyes were glossy and full of admiration.

“Keep that idea in mind, ok?”

A smile appeared on your face and a tear ran down your cheek as you nodded.

“I promise I will”

A feeling of relief washed over you and it were if a field of butterflies had been released into your stomach. The glance he had given you warmed your heart more then he had realized at the time.

However, when he turned and walked away, it was impossible for you to know that it was the last time he’d ever look at you like that for at least a decade.

And with that he was gone.

It was the last time you saw him, before he had went and murdered all those people. And you couldn’t help but feel you were partially to blame.

The guilt and the loss of Suguru only worsened your depression, to the point where Satoru land Shoko had found out about it. They tried talking to you about it but you insisted you were ok, despite loosing all will to fight any curses or go on any missions.

Eventually, they convinced you to get help. Your mental state began to recover from the effects of Geto, but even so you’d never fully recover from the longing of a normal life.

At this point in time, becoming a sorcerer was the only appropriate option. You felt like you had be one in attempt to atone. Not only that but because if you didn’t choose that path, you’d only become like him.

So you stayed. You became a sorcerer along Gojo and Shoko, despite what your heart truly wanted and you’d never see Suguru again.

During a mission with Satoru, you two had gotten split up while taking down some cursed spirits. It was dark and clouds covered most of the stars with a few peeking through every now and then.

After killing the grade 2 curse that attacked you, you wandered around making sure to keep your guard up, while looking for your partner.

"Satoru! Gojo! Shit…”

As you walked around in the dark, you felt the hairs standing up on the back of your neck. You could tell by darkness of the sky and the smell the air that it was about to rain. Maybe that was the reason?

“Hey!”

You turned around already rolling your eyes getting ready to ridicule the white haired idiot. “Where did you go? I was-“

When you turned around you froze, letting your heart drop into your stomach. There stood Geto, hair flowing down his back with a gentle smile on his face.

You were forced to get over him. To forget about him completely. But when the man who used to mean the whole world to you, who you haven’t seen in a decade, is standing right in front of you, it’s hard to to stop yourself from longing for what was lost.

“Long time, no see”

A lump began to form in your throat and tears began to coat yours eyes.

“Suguru..?”

You took a few steps closer, leaving a mere 6-7 feet between you two. “Where? Why?” you tried asking, through the cracking in your voice.

“I’m sorry, y/n.” he said softly, avoiding your attempt at questioning him. Sniffling and wiping the tears from your face, you managed to mutter the words “If I knew you were alive, I would’ve… Shit. I- I don’t want to fight you.”

“I just want to have one more conversation with you now that I know it might be the last.”

Geto took a deep breath before taking a few steps closer to you. It’s like the walls you had built up had began crumble the moment you’d realized it was truly him.

“You know me and Gojo still talk about you sometimes” you said, still holding back a breakdown. “Really?”

“Well, its more of me talking and him shutting me down” you muttered, laughing through the tears. “What do you talk about?” he asked, with raised eyebrows and a gentle smile.

You were hesitant to answer, unsure of if your response would offend him or comfort him. “If something were to… I don’t know? Change in you. If you wanted to come back and be a sorcerer, if we’d let you?”

“Oh…” he said, letting the slight smile fall from his face. “I don’t think that’ll happen any time soon, but- if i did, what would the answer be? Just out of curiosity of course~” he continued.

“I- I don’t know. I’d like to say yes but-“

“I understand… And Satoru?” His voice softened, as it usually did when saying either of your names. “He said no” you mumbled, lowering your head out of sympathy.

Although his face didn’t show any type of surprise, you could tell by the fake smile he put on that he was a little upset that neither one of you would let him in.

“It’s a shame you became a sorcerer, y/n. Last time we talked it seemed like you were leaning more against it.”

The burning feeling in your throat began to intensify at the thought of him remembering your last conversation. “I did it because of you. I felt bad, ok?”

Geto inched closer to you and let out a deep sigh, as he said “What I did had nothing to do with what you told me. I made that decision on my own”. It was comforting to hear him say, but despite that it was already to late.

“I just didn’t want to leave them while they were still hurting over you disregarding us like we meant nothing to you!”

A cocky laugh escaped from Geto’s mouth as he said the words “Funny coming from you, considering you wanted to run away from everything”.

It began to sprinkle, filling the silence with the sound of raindrops hitting the concrete. Tears began to form as you tried to find ways to defend yourself.

“That’s not the same thing and you know it, Geto”

Along with the rain, the wind began to rustle the trees. It was as if nature had heard the deafening silence and began to fill the emptiness.

The tears began to fall down your face. They were filled with anger, sadness, and happiness, and every single one that fell was at the hands of Suguru Geto.

“Do you think… if we had ran away together things would be different?”

His eyes that were previously locked on you fell to the floor and the calm look on his face turned into a frown.

“I don’t know, y/n. Maybe.”

The hope in his ‘maybe’ struck you. It was as if you could see it. Blue skies. A small house.

It’d be an early morning with you sitting on the couch codling your baby. They’d have his slender, black eyes and your beautiful hair. Suguru would be cooking breakfast, despite having to leave for work the same morning. And when he was ready to leave, he’d kiss your forehead goodbye and stand in the door way waving to you and his child.

The things you were imagining were so vivid they almost felt real. Him standing in front of you, with a smile on his face in the doorway of your own place felt like…

Home.

However, you were quickly snapped back into the present as Geto’s words broke you from your state of daydreaming. “Looks like we’ve wasted away all our chances, huh?” he mourned, turning his head from you to look towards the brightness of the moon.

You turned your head to admire the moon as well. Maybe so that way, even if you two didn’t share the same views on society, you could at least share the same view of the night sky.

“I wish there was another way” you whispered, so quiet, it was if it were only meant to be heard by you and the universe.

You saw Geto make some sort of movement from your peripheral vision, however when you looked back towards him, you didn’t expect to see him with his arm extended towards you.

“You could always join me”

It was if time had stopped. No more rain. No more wind. The only thing in this moment that mattered was you and him.

Before you could even manage to come up with a reply, Geto continued on with his idea. “Everything you’ve ever wanted, you could have. A house? A family? Whatever life you want to live, you got it. All I’m asking is that you live it by my side and not Satoru’s”

Your face that was soaked in tears, had become frozen. The fact you were even considering this was already a bad sign.

You chose to be sorcerer all those years ago. To go back on your word… your promise? What would they think of you? Nanami. Shoko. Gojo. You loved them more then life itself.

But maybe it was time for you to come to terms with the fact you loved Geto more than anything else.

You slowly inched your hand closer to his palm, shaking in hesitation and fear.

“Y/n? Is this guy bothering you?”

You froze in place uncertain if you were hearing things correctly. Turning your head over your left shoulder you could see bright blue eyes piercing through the darkness. “Satoru?” you mumbled, now simply hovering over Geto’s open hand.

“Go ahead, Suguru. Finish your speech”

“Ah long time no see, Satoru” he said ignoring the request. His eyes glanced at you before his hand fell to his side and his body began to walk towards Gojo.

“I was just catching up with an old friend that’s all”

Your hand still hovered in the air, as if you hadn’t processed that there was no longer another one below it to catch it.

As Geto and Satoru’s voices faded into the background your hand slowly fell aswell. Raindrops blended into your tears, as you couldn’t help but let them begin to flow.

A life without sorcery. A life with Suguru. Maybe all those years ago, when you blamed yourself for Geto turning out this way, you were wrong. Maybe in truth, you were jealous. Maybe…

You deserved to be happy.

The sound of rain, thunder, and trees blowing all came back at once, like a broken record fixing itself and playing on its own. You’d finally gained the courage to turn around and say something. However, just as you were about to, you’d overheard what Satoru was saying .

“Y/n isn’t like you. Not all sorcerers are broken Suguru.”

And in that moment, your heart had shattered. Not because you were broken, but because after shunning him away for an entire decade, you realized you were like Geto, your lost lover and enemy, in every way possible.

“Stop” came from between your lips, so quiet you could barley hear yourself. You weren’t sure if it was meant for them or for you, but either way, you repeated once more, loud enough for everyone to hear.

“I want-“

The two looked at you waiting for you to blurt out the rest of your words. One stood tall with a raised eyebrow, cocking his head to the side as you tried to swallow the burning feeling in your throat once more. A tear streamed down your face and at that moment, you had made your choice.

“I’m sorry-”

Gojo had let out a sigh of relief and began walking over to you before realizing that another word had rolled off your tongue.

“Satoru.”

The look on his face changed from relieved to concerned. “Huh?” he muttered, assuming he was misunderstanding the situation.

You tilted your head down to the floor and began to walk towards Geto. Your shoulder grazed Satoru’s and you could feel his blue eyes staring you down even though you didn’t didn’t lock eyes.

As you interlocked fingers with Suguru, you looked up to see Satorou defeated. Torn. Heartbroken in a way you haven’t seen in years. “I want to be happy, Gojo. And I cant be that being a sorcerer.”

Gojo clenched his jaw and raised his hand in a defensive manner. “Stop. Y/n-“

“It’s settled.”

As Suguru pulled you away from Gojo, you watched him. A single tear dropped from his eye, as his elevated arm that was still pointed towards you began to shake.

Not a single word managed to escape his lips, but judging by the look on his face, you could tell he had been over come with complete anguish.

Once again you were overcome with guilt, as you watched his arm fall back to his side. He just stood there, confused and upset, completely taking in your betrayal.

The moon shined over you that night and it was as if your hope for a new future was being represented by the stars peeking through the clouds. However, as the light from the sky hit your skin, and illuminated you and Suguru, you couldn’t help but feel bad as you watched Gojo fade into the dark, just as you did with Suguru all those years ago.

“Goodbye, Satoru Gojo.”

[softestqueeen]

i can't do this anymore!

pairing: bbc!sherlock x gn!reader

summary: When Sherlock overhears you talking on the phone, he thinks you're going to leave him.

warnings: nothing really, just miscommunication and a little angst

a/n: hey, this is my first ever fanfic so please be a bit patient with me. English is not my first language, I apologise for all the mistakes I've probably made.

Sherlock and you have been in an relationship for almost two years and so far everything was going great. Well, at least that’s what Sherlock thought.

Until one day, when he overheard you on the phone talking to your best friend, Mary. It wasn’t his intention to eavesdrop, but you looked upset while talking and he just wanted to assure he wasn’t the cause for it.

You were on the phone ranting to your best friend about wanting to quit your job. It didn’t make you happy anymore and you’ve already applied for new jobs. You didn’t tell Sherlock yet, because he was very busy with one of his cases and didn’t want to bother him with something that could wait.

“I’ve noticed that in these past few weeks I wasn’t happy anymore with this situation. I can’t keep on doing this, it’s just too much. So the only right thing to do, is end it. Once and for all.”, you told her.

Hearing this, Sherlocks heart shattered. He thought you were happy with how things were in your relationship, but apparently that was not the case. He couldn’t hear what Mary said on the other end, but he could hear very clearly that your plan was to end it tomorrow.

He couldn’t lose you. You were his everything, his reason to live. You made his life worth living and managed to break down the walls he built to protect himself. He trusted you with his life, so just thinking about you wanting to break up with him, nearly send him spiralling.

He didn’t know what to do or say so hedecided to wait until tomorrow and then beg you to not break up with him. Even if he’d have to get on his knees and beg. Alone the thought of you leaving made tears well up in his eyes.

He quickly composed himself, because he could hear you saying goodbye to your best friend. Acting like he was in his mind palace when you entered, gave him some time to think about what to say tomorrow.

“Hey Sherly”, he could hear your joyful voice call for him, but choose to ignore it, keeping up with the act. You were not happy at all with Sherlock ignoring you. After all the time you’ve spent with the consulting detective you knew when he was really in his mind palace and when he was just pretending.

With a frown on your face, you bent down to be at eye level with him. You crossed your arms and lifted an eyebrow. The moment you lifted your brow you could already hear the defeated sigh from your boyfriend.

“Hello, love”, he greeted you with a tight lipped smile. Immediately a crease started to form between your brows. “Is everything alright, honey?”, you asked him. “Yes, everything is just fine, love. I just have to.. uh.. go to a crime scene. Exactly, John called, he needs my help. Now. Don’t wait up for me.”, while explaining his not really convincing plan he put on his signature coat and his scarf.

He kissed you on the side of your head and left without another word. You could just mumble a short “take care” before you heard the door to the busy streets of London shut closed.

Not going to lie, you were worried. Why was he acting so weird all of the sudden? He seemed almost distant. Normally, when something is on the genius’ mind he talks to you. You’ve made a lot of progress since you first got together and talk about almost everything. You knew each other so well, you could always tell what’s on his mind, even if he doesn’t like to admit that. It’s his own fault, if he teaches you to deduct people. But in this case you wanted to wait until he came to you with his worries. Whatever it was it seemed to really bother your boyfriend.

Sherlock wandered around aimlessly before he returned to Baker Street. He wasn’t ready to face you just yet, so he did something he rarely did. He visited his house keeper Mrs. Hudson. He was that desperate.

He knocked twice, before the elderly woman opened the door with a surprised smile on her lips. “What do I owe the honour to, Sherlock? You never come to visit me.”, she ushered him in and set on a kettle.

“Uhm… I fear y/n wants to break up with me.”, he mumbled, not daring to look Mrs. Hudson in the eyes. “Oh, Sherlock! What makes you believe that?”, she wanted to know from the detective, that has grown into her heart and is now like a son to her. She was worried, she knew how much you meant to him.

On the other side she also knew how much you loved him and doubted that you wanted to end things. Sherlock told her what he overheard of your conversation. “But Sherlock, are you really sure that’s what she meant? Couldn’t she have been talking about her job or something?”, she wanted to know.

He just shrugged and sipped his tea.

“I think you should go and talk to her, Sherlock. Maybe it’s all just a big misunderstanding.”, she reasoned. Still unsure of himself he nodded and thanked her for the advice. “Anytime, Sherlock, anytime.”

He went back into the flat you two shared, first as flatmates and now as lovers. He couldn’t see you anywhere and softly called out your name. He went into his bedroom, which the two of you mostly share and found you underneath the blanked, hugging his pillow. The dried tears on your face made his heart shatter.

He wasn’t sure what to do, thinking he messed up. He undressed and put on his pyjamas, but instead of joining his lover in the bed, he went back to the living area and settled on the couch. It wasn’t comfortable but he couldn’t sleep anyways. At around 4 o’clock in the morning his exhaustion won and he fell into a dreamless slumber.

You woke up to an empty bed. It wasn’t something new, but you worried about your boyfriends whereabouts. A lot.

You got up and found him asleep on the couch, looking incredibly uncomfortable, his tall frame not fitting into the small space provided. You started to rub your hand up and down his arm to wake him up.

Slowly he opened his blue-green eyes and looked into your e/c eyes. He sat up, stretched and then looked at you like a kicked puppy. If you looked close enough you could even see a pout forming on his plump lips.

“Sherlock, what’s wrong?”, you asked cautiously.

After a very pregnant pause he chocked out, “Please don’t leave me. I- I- I just cant live without you, you are my everything!”

You looked at the tear that rolled down his face, taking a path over his high cheekbone to the corner of his lip, with utter shock and heartbreak.

“Oh darling, what makes you believe I want to break up with you?”, you sat down next to him, cupped his cheek and used the pad of your thumb to wipe away a new tear that threatened to roll down his face. “I love you so much, I would never leave you!”

Sherlock released a shaky breath and leaned forward, making your foreheads touch. He cupped your face and whispered with his eyes closed, “I thought you’re going to leave me. I- I was so scared I-“ “Shh, it’s alright, darling. I’m not going to leave you. You’re stuck with me now.”

The last sentence made the detective smile. You furrowed your brows. “What made you think I was going to leave you?”, you wanted to know. He looked hesitant and then admitted, “I heard you talking to Mary about how fed up you were and that you wanted to end things. I assumed that you were talking about us.” He avoided looking at your eyes.

You chuckled a bit but stopped when you saw his puzzled expression. “I want to quit my job. I’m not unhappy with us, silly, I’m unhappy with my boss and my colleagues. I haven’t told you about it because you’ve been so busy with your case.”, you reassured him, “Why did you eavesdrop on our conversation in the first place?”

“You looked worried and I wanted to be sure that I’m not the cause of it. I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”, he confessed. You knew that when he dropped the words ‘I’m sorry’ he really meant it.

“It’s alright, you meant it well.”, you told him, “I wish you would have been honest with me from the beginning, but I could have asked you what’s going on when I noticed you acting weird. From now on we know better.”

“You are right. As always.”, even though he whispered the last part, you’ve still heard it.

With a soft smile you stood up, “Come on darling, let’s go to bed.”

He immediately stood up, picked you up bridal style and took you to his bedroom.

He was just glad, he still gets to call you his love.

a/n: if you liked this, please leave some notes! you can now also request fics on my page!

[jacksdinonuggets]

~Fight Nights~

Y'ALL I HAD AN IDEA AND I WROTE IT.

Summary: Vaggie has a fight with Charlie and needs comfort. However, the only other person she can run to is Carmilla

Vaggie stormed out of the hotel, angry, and on the brink of tears. She and Charlie had just gotten into a fight. They didn’t fight often so it really affected them when they did. The reason that they fought? Vaggie was suppressing her negative emotions again, therefore keeping a secret. This made Charlie pretty upset since she wanted them to have a mutual relationship and not just one protector. However, Vaggie viewed herself as someone who couldn’t show weakness so she got pretty worked up when Charlie confronted her about it. She didn’t mean to turn it into an argument. It just sort of happened.

Anyways, she just really needed comfort from someone and the only other person she could really go to was carmilla. She had been taking fighting lessons once a week with her and sometimes, she would even teach a little bit of ballet so she could learn to dance-fight. At first, they would just go back and forth with returning weapons and paying some loans and business stuff but then they started to get a bit personal. Sometimes, if Vaggie was having a bad day, Carmilla would invite her into her office and they would talk about whatever was bothering her before they practiced.

So, still slightly pissed and more emotional than ever, she walked to her warehouse that was also just her normal house. She knocked on the big metal doors, hanging her head low. Now was not the time to cry.

The doors opened after a couple of seconds and Carmilla greeted her at the door.

“Vaggie, what brings you here? It is not our normal practice day,” She questioned as she urged the girl inside. 

“I just-... I needed someplace safe to cool down. Me and Charlie had a fight,” Vaggie explained. Talking had never seemed as hard as it did at that moment. It felt like with every word she was about to break down into tears. Usually, if she was feeling like this, she would go to Charlie and the two would cuddle, spend time together, or have little time. But she couldn’t because she felt wrong for having to want comfort from the person she just fought with. It would be awkward and strange.

Carmilla sighed, “How about you meet me in my office and i’ll bring up a cup of tea. Then you can tell me all about it, ‘kay?” Vaggie nodded and started walking up the stairs. She passed the big doors that lead into the main house area and went towards the office. 

As Vaggie was waiting, she could feel her headspace teetering. It was a weird feeling to want to be taken care of and comforted by basically a stranger. But somehow she grew sort of attached to her.

When Carmilla returned, she had two cups of tea in her hand. She gave one to Vaggie, who was sitting on the couch. She nodded a thank you and took a sip. Carmilla sat next to her and put her’s on the coffee table.

“Alright, why don’t you tell me what’s going on?” she prompted. Vaggie took a deep breath and began.

“Charlie had begun to notice that i was hiding my vulnerable emotions and lying whenever she would ask if i was okay. I get overwhelmed easily but I would say i was fine whenever someone would ask, just to not be seen as weak. Well, she noticed and confronted me about it. We got into this huge fight and she brought up how i haven’t regressed-” Shit, she can’t tell her that. That’s too personal. Plus, what if she thinks its weird? “Uh- I mean used this one coping mechanism in a month or two and that i was repressing it,” wow, great save there.

“Anyways, she hit a few nerves that I know she probably regrets. I said a few things I’m not proud of, but it still hurts. Its like, I really want a hug but I can’t get it because she’s the only one I have who can comfort and love me!” Vaggie spiraled. At this point, she didn’t even care that she was talking to a dangerous overlord. She just needed to rant. And rant she did.

“Would it make you feel better if I gave you a hug?” Carmilla offered. She saw how Vaggie looked as though she desperately needed one. It was like looking at a small panicking child. You just needed to help them. In a way, Vaggie reminded her of her daughters. And Carmilla reminded Vaggie of a mother in a way. Not like she’s ever known hers, being a heavenborn orphan whose only family consisted of exorcists who bullied her.

Vaggie nodded. Carmilla wrapped her arms around the small, short girl and gave a reassuring squeeze. Vaggie had never wanted to cry more than did right now. It was overwhelming. But not exactly in a bad way. She felt this strange, clingy emotion towards her. 

Carmilla was about to pull away but she felt something stopping her. Vaggie’s arms were gripping her waist like her life depended on it and she could feel something wet on her collarbone where Vaggie had her head. She hadn’t even noticed the girl start crying. But nonetheless, she rubbed her back and comforted her, just like she would with her daughters.

“Shh, it's okay, I’ve got you,” she whispered in a soothing motherly tone, the one she never uses with strangers or in combat.

Vaggie’s headspace dipped so far when those words were spoken. She felt so small, like a toddler in Carmilla’s big embrace. 

“Mama..” Vaggie mumbled into her chest. It was very muffled and quiet though.

Carmilla noticed the words spoken from vaggie and knew that the girl’s headspace had dropped. She wasn’t stupid. She knew what regression was. 

“Mama’s here, sweetie,” she gently told her.

The two hugged for what seemed to be 5 minutes until Vaggie calmed down. She didn’t want to let go though. It felt so good to feel loved.

“It seems like it’s past your bedtime, little one,” she said when they pulled apart. Vaggie pouted but was noticeably tired. It was about 9:30 and her little brain could only stay up so late.

“Come on, I’ve got a spare room you can use.” she stood up and signalled for her to follow her. However, she Vaggie was having some trouble standing. She kept falling over. Having one eye and being small didn’t mix well for balance. 

Carmila bent over and picked her up. She held her by her hip as she carried her out of the office, their tea forgotten. She walked towards the big doors that led to the main house area. When she opened the doors, Clara and Odette were sitting in the living room on the couch. They looked up to see their mother carrying the princesses girlfriend? It confused them but Carmilla mouthed ‘I’ll explain later’. 

When they approached the guest room, Carmilla was able to hold Vaggie with one hand for about a second to open the door. They didn’t have any spare pajamas so Vaggie would have to sleep in her current clothes. They didn’t seem too uncoomfortable though.

Carmila laid her down in the bed and pulled the covers over her, tucking her in.

“Wha’ bout Char-Char?” Vaggie rubbed her eyes. The big kid in her knew that Charlie would be expecting her to be home in about an hour and would definitely begin freaking out if she wasn’t home by then.

“I’ll let her know you’re staying the night,” Carmilla said in a hushed voice, “For now, its ni-ni,”

Once she was done tucking her in she turned off the lights and left, but not before cracking the door just in case Vaggie needed anything during the night. Then, she went back downstairs to explain the situation to her daughters. They seemed pretty okay with it and promised not to spread it, as Carmilla knew it was something she’d probably like to keep a secret. In the end, Carmila never expected to be the mother of three, yet here she was.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana HCs: M6 when the child they have with you is an exact carbon copy of them

To clarify: said children are, by natural or magical processes, the biological child of MC and their beloved; and the child's assigned sex at birth is the same as the love interest in question. Apparently all your traits are recessive.

Julian

There are two drama kings in the house now, and only one stage. That may or may not be a good thing

Baby proofing the house for this level of clumsiness is impossible

Child has the same thirst for knowledge and insatiable curiosity, with even less maturity (can you blame him? He's a kid!) And it gets him into so much trouble

Julian is teaching him how to be The Best Actor

They put on plays for you in the kitchen and rope you into it

Child has the same tendency to mentally spiral, and teaching him the coping mechanisms he needs for it is helping Julian grow so much

Same tendency to get himself tangled up in ridiculous situations.

The best moment was when he (as a five year old) walked up on stage in the community theater during a play so he could confront the villain up close for treating the heroes so badly

The actors were so charmed they improvised him into the performance

After you put him to bed that night you found Julian crying into his leeches, he was so proud

Child now has a standing invitation to star in any appropriate performance

Portia makes him his little costumes

Mazelinka is always in the front row adding a cutting commentary loud enough for the entire audience to hear (they love it)

The South End has sworn their allegiance to him

Nadia jokingly calls him her little rival

Asra

So many pranks

Asra is determined to be the best parent they never had, and staying present in his son's life is giving him a whole new perspective on his childhood and his parent's experience

It leads to a few rough conversations he was avoiding with them, but yields the best results

Grandma Aisha and Grandpa Salim

Always down to watch your kid when you two need a break, but beware, he'll come back with a plethora of new spells to use

He loves Faust and she loves him. He practiced crawling by following her around the shop

Does not know his limits and does not want to. Asra has to remake the wards on the doors to the shop every few months to be harder to unlock because his son keeps trying to go off on unannounced trips

Regularly steals the big feathered hat and wears it around the shop. It always slips over his eyes

Sees the way Asra fawns over you and follows that example to a T

Sometimes you team up with him to prank Asra

One morning you couldn't get Asra to wake up for breakfast so you gave the kid some markers and let him play Picasso all over his dad's chest and face

Asra noticed the two of you giggling all morning but couldn't figure out why until he caught themself in the mirror just before lunch

So proud of their son's artistic talent he refused to wash it off

Wore the most chest exposing shirt he had to show it off

Muriel was so confused when you three went to visit him that afternoon

He remembers meeting Asra at that age by the docks, and begins teaching the child how to paint on animal carvings

Child likes to practice on Faust with watercolors now. She feels fabulous.

Nadia

Raising an independent child who is convinced she knows best and needs no help is Difficult

Nadia is much quicker to lose her patience with her than you are

They both rant to you about how difficult the other is

Have fun being the peacemaker

It's actually not that bad, Nadia knows exactly what her daughter feels like and goes out of the way to help her feel empowered and unique

It's important to her that her daughter has a good upbringing, but she also wants her to have the freedom to pursue her desires

So competitive when you three go horseback riding it's not even funny

This little girl has so many doting Aunties she's at risk of getting spoiled rotten

Natiqa teaches her the art of negotiation very early on and this little girl is so precocious she picks it up right away

Next time Nadia is entertaining visiting dignitaries she crashes the reception and start negotiating a trade deal

The visitors are impressed, slightly intimidated, and completely caught off guard

Nadia takes full advantage of that and the two of them work together to seal the deal

You begin having terrifying visions of what would happen once she grows up and the two of them share a common goal, or worse, a common enemy

Portia is the worst enabler and fills her in with all the palace gossip she desires for her to use as she sees fit

Muriel

You didn't know a baby could be this quiet

You start to worry a bit with how little he talks, until one day a butterfly lands on his chubby little fist and he's so excited to tell you all about it that he almost forgets to breathe

Basically he doesn't speak unless he feels like it, or until you find something he likes and then oh boy he's so happy to open up and chatter about it

Like Muriel, he's big for his age, but unlike Muriel, he grows up out in the woods where he doesn't have any reason to worry about it

Muriel can't stop marveling over him

He wakes up every morning and finds so much joy in giving his son a childhood full of life and wonder and peace

Realizing how much he would do for his son gives him appreciation for what his parents tried to do for him

Innana is fiercely protective

When your son was learning to walk she would stalk beside him just in case he needed her as a landing cushion

It's not uncommon to find the two of them curled up together under a tree taking a post lunch nap

He adores Uncle Asra

Asra stops by pretty regularly, always with something new and interesting for their nephew

But the best days are fishing days

Muriel will get up early with him and they'll trek out to their favorite fishing spot so you can have a day to go into town

The two of them will sit side by side, maybe they share some conversation, maybe they enjoy the quiet together

So excited to show you everything they caught

He definitely inherited his father's love for eel

You'll make a campfire for the catch and feast all evening, until he falls asleep under Muriel's cloak and you carry him inside for the night

One time he was watching some of the chicken's eggs hatch and the babies imprinted on him

Watching him walk around giggling both confused and delighted with a gaggle of chirping yellow puffballs trailing him was one of the best afternoons of your life

It wasn't so great when the sun went down and you told him they weren't allowed to sleep in his bed and he'd have to wait until morning to see them again

Portia

There is so much hair, everywhere

You love them both and you love their beautiful curly red hair but you just pulled a strand out of your tea and you don't know how much more you can take

One of her first words was "Pepi" and she was mimicking the cat before she was speaking full sentences

Portia loves to play tag with her in the garden, chasing her around the vines and diving in for tickle attacks

The baby squeals. The baby giggles. This child is laughter and joy personified

This child has no concept of danger and it makes Nadia so stressed

She hears you call the Countess "Nadia" but she also hears Portia call her "milady" so she just calls her "miladidalia"

The palace is her playground once she's old enough to walk over and all the staff adore her

Knows all the shortcuts and secret tunnels in the palace by the time she's 7

It's not hard to find out where she is though, just follow the giggles

Ilya adores her, it's his precious little sister all over again!

He drops by almost every day with an offering for the princess

The first time she calls him "uncilya" he cries

You trek into town with her and Portia every week to visit Mazelinka

Lots of singing and dancing together

The summer after she turns 6 she tries to stowaway on Mazelinka's ship

She almost succeeds

Cue you and Portia hunting all over Vesuvia in a frenzy

Nadia has all the palace guards out looking too

The guards all know and love her already, they would have rebelled if she hadn't let them

Asra's tracking magic points you in the direction of the docks, where Julian gets one of the vendors to admit to giving her a ride to Mazelinka's ship (he didn't know what she was plotting)

They set sail this morning and now the moon is coming up

Nadia's already summoning the royal yacht when Mazelinka's ship reappears on the horizon

So many kisses and hugs and tears of relief

So much scolding the next morning

Deep down once the panic has subsided Portia is so proud and excited for her little adventurer

From then on you start incorporating important traveling skills into her upbringing (world maps, basic self defense, phrases in the main languages) because you know it's only a matter of time before your little girl takes the world by storm

Lucio

Lucio's trying his best, he really is, and it helps that he understands his son so well, but taking care of kids does not come naturally to him

Especially quiet displays of affection

Thankfully his son is anything but quiet

He loves following Lucio around and piggybacking off of his antics

If he's not mimicking his father he's off with Mercedes and Melchior terrorizing everyone in the vicinity

You understand now why Morga had such a hard time letting Lucio suffer consequences

He is adorable when he is in trouble, and also so scared

You have to learn the balance of letting him understand what he's done and suffer the consequences while letting him know you've got his back

Lucio on the other hand indulges his every whim

The two of them have a shared love of shiny things

He likes to put on his dad's fancy regalia and strut around the palace like a peacock

Most of all, he wants a pretty golden arm like his dad

Has a tantrum when he tries to pull it off of Lucio's shoulder and it doesn't work

It leads to a very helpful conversation about why Lucio has a golden arm, and what wars are, and the importance of valuing human life

Lucio is so impressed with imparting that lesson early that he immediately commissions a golden sleeve/glove for his baby boy as a reward

Now they match \^.^/

[urauntiefaye]

Hi! Any fluffy thoughts on how bnd will take care of you when you're sad 🥹

Boy Next Door When You're Sad🌸❤️‍🩹

CW: Fluff, some angst, mentions of a depressive episode in Sunghos 

A/N: Why do I always go overboard with Sungho-

WC: 475

Jaehyun- When Jaehyun saw you crying when he came home he swears he could feel his heart drop. Seeing you even a little bit sad breaks his heart, he would get you into matching pjs and wrap you up in a blanket as he brings you snacks and food, he’ll definitely ask what happened. He’s the type of boyfriend to want to know what made you sad but also try to make you laugh with his goofiness. His first step is to get you comfortable, then to laugh, then when you feel ready to talk to him about what happened. 

Sungho- Okay, so Sungho is very observant when it comes to you, so he noticed when you first started to spiral into a deep depressive state. He noticed you not eating as much to you speaking less, he saw the sadness through your smile. He would approach you when it’s just the two of you. He’d want to sit you down, he won’t ask what it is making you sad. Instead he’d reassure you of his love and that he will always be there for you. His kind words would cause your throat to strain from trying to hold back the sobs. But as soon as he hugged you it all spilled out like a waterfall. He would hold you so tightly, kissing your temple telling you it’s going to be okay eventually and that he’s not going anywhere. 

Riwoo- Doesn’t know what to do at first, when he saw you break down into tears he’d stand there for a while. But he’ll soon rush over to you and wipe your tears away asking what happened. As you tell him his sorrows he’d end up crying as well, he’s the type that shares your pain. After you’re done crying he’ll take you out for some ice cream and shopping hoping you’ll feel better. 

Taesan- He’s silent, but his actions are loud. You would come home after a really long day at work, feeling frustrated with yourself as your boss had yelled at you for making a simple mistake. Taesan would be on his phone listening to his music when you came home, he’d smile, feeling you climb on top of him and cuddle into his chest. But that smile would soon turn in a look of concern as he hears your sobs. He’s another that won’t ask what happened, he’d just hold you and let you rant. 

Leehan- A mixture of Jaehyun and Sungho, he’d hold you close as you rant and cry but once you’ve calmed down he’d try to make you as comfortable as can be. Also trying to make you laugh, he’d even have you rant to his fish because when he’s sad that’s what he does. He’ll silently listen to your worries and your fears while he cuddles you so closely. 

[residentfromnowhere]

| NOTICE |

ModernAu!SanemiShinaguzawaXReader

TW: Language, Angst, Unresolved Issues

Note: Not Proofread

“Love you, babe but sometimes you talk too much”

You pause, smile slowly fading as the words start registering in your head. Continuing he says, “Like at first, I was glad that you finally came out of that phase to where you only spoke a few words but no it’s becoming insufferable!” He says while he and some of his friends laugh more. He glanced at you for a split second before continuing to laugh. Some people in the group glance between the both of you in disbelief while others give him a death stare. All the while you just sit there, silently with your mouth parted.

I’m insufferable? I talk too much? That’s how he’s been thinking of me this whole time?

Your eyes start to water as you run back all the interactions with him and his friends and you can hear your heart slowly breaking. Your throat goes dry with ever second you sit there and listen to him rant about how insufferable and annoying you are. To him, it was just lighthearted jokes but to you, it was the start to you slowly drifting away from and he had no idea.

You and Sanemi have been dating for about two years and you thought that you could finally be yourself with someone and not feel as though you were a burden. Though he could be a total jerk at times, he made you feel safe. Beautiful. Utterly at peace. But after that night at a mutuals get together while on the rooftop sitting on the couch he completely embarrassed you in front of all of your mutual friends, something changed. The person you thought you could rust and thought highly of you actually thought the opposite and the fact he would say such things in the guise of a joke made it worse.

Something in you changed that night while you sat there not saying a word while listening to his mini rant or “jokes”. It was as if the person who you swore to protect and promised after all these years that they finally found their safespace completely stabs them in the heart in front of everyone they knew. You felt betrayed and you also felt like you betrayed yourself by trusting him. He knew how hard you worked to get yourself to open up and genuinely feel whole again so why would he break you that way?

This downward spiral started that night when you both got home. You were radio silent as he continued to talk about how he had an amazing time at the party. He kept looking for you to agree or at least nod but he received nothing. Continuing thinking that maybe you didn’t hear him, he proceeds to ask why you stopped talking. “You know I love your voice, why didn’t you talk?” Didnt you say that I was annoying? That I talked too much? And now you love it?

You pause, not knowing that your face twisted into a mixture of anger and disbelief. You quickly turn around and head to the bedroom, not wanting to cry in front of him. He was a bit tipsy sure but aware enough to know when something was wrong and when he saw your face briefly change, there was no denying that something was up.

“Babe, what’s wrong?” He says while following you to the bedroom. Since at this point you completely shut down, he wasn’t getting a peep out of you and this is something you haven’t done in over a year due to thinking he was your safespace. It’s now like you and through a factory reset and can or want to no longer talk.

You are what’s wrong.

You continue to take off your jewelry and then do something you haven’t done since the beginning of the relationship, you take the clothes you picked out for bed and go to the bathroom which snaps Sanemi out of his tipsy state. You used to do this due to the fear of being judged but slowly got comfortable with him to undress in front of him because he always made you feel like your body was the most beautiful thing on this planet. Now though, you wonder if all of that was a lie to shut you up about your body images issues you used to mention to him.

You’re questioning everything up to this point. Every word, every gesture, everything. You slam the door behind you before he could get another word in, leaving him there with a confused. Not leaving the bathroom for the rest of the night while he after a few persistent knocks, gave up and passed out on the bed. He thought that maybe you were just tired and had nothing to say at that moment. But little did he know that the weight of his words will soon be the consequences of his actions.

The next couple of weeks were quiet. Usually, you would happily wake him up in the morning with breakfast in hand and talk about yours and his plans for the day but not once did you do that. Besides the cause “morning” you basically became a ghost. He didn’t notice it at first due to usually spacing out or focusing on other things but around the end of the fourth week, he started noticing.

Your blank stares, short “yes” or “no” answers, the lack of conversations throughout the day and most of all, your voice. The one thing he thought would always be there was your voice. He worked so hard to hear that beautiful voice of yours wether you’re laughing, crying, arguing or just making silly noises and once he got to hear it, it was if he forgot how hard he worked, how much trust he had to earn to hear it. He won’t lie, you would talk his head off at times but never did he ever think you would just stop.

He sat at the kitchen table, wondering what happened or if he did something wrong to make you stop talking. To make you stop everything and then it hit him. Since the party a couple of weeks back, you have completely stopped interacting with him in the ways you used to and that he must have done something stupid in order for you to do so. Suddenly, he hears you unlocking the door to the apartment and he jumps up, shocked that you didn’t call him and that he just now noticed how distant you have been.

I’m a fucking dumbass. How did I just now notice?

Without hesitation, he walks up to you and grabs your shoulders. You look at him in shock, not anticipating what he was going to say next. “Tell me what’s wrong.” He says while watching for a reaction. You stand there and as if your mouth had a mind of its own says “Why? So you can tell everyone how I’m back to being insufferable?” And with that you could see his eyes widen. He scoffed in disbelief. “When did I say-“ before he could finish, you cut him off with a quiet “Forget it” and push by him. He froze in place by the sudden realization of what he said back then. He never meant to hurt you nor make you feel like this but of course he had to say some stupid shit and ruin what little confidence or faith in him you had.

The next hour is a one sided conversation. You silently clearing your things and he pressing you for answers. There were several things that he said that made you want to cry and furthered your desire to leave but the straw that broke the camels back is when he said in a fit of rage over your lack of response says “Actually, I’m glad you finally got the hint and stopped yapping so much. It’s been peaceful since you stopped”.

As soon as it left his mouth, he regretted every single thing he said. Tears started falling down your face and his heart dropped. “Y/N, wait i-“ you grab your bags and push by him, not leaving him any room to say anything else. You feel yourself being tugged backward by your bag. You don’t know what possessed you to do so but when you felt your hand connect with his face and the sound of it echoing across the apartment you once shared with him, but whatever did made you realized that the decision of leaving was the best one. You took one last look before uttering “we are done” and leaving, slamming the door behind you. You didn’t stick around long enough to see him trying to rush out and stop you because by then, you were in your car and long gone. Maybe it was for the best so why are you balling your eyes out, wishing you would have stayed?

[selfdiagnosedeyemotif]

okay i know i just reblogged something on this and went on a rant there but jsut. kristoph gavins sprites. are so sprites. they’re just

this transition messed me up so bad when i first saw it. kristoph isnt an intimidatingly designed guy but this is legit a little creepy

also i dont know whats really going on with it but his arms are truly always crossed. screaming to the sky the name of his mortal enemy while his hair flies wildly behind him?

arms crossed. utterly broken, unwound, spouting gibberish about the meaning of the court after hes already lost?

arms. crossed. hes so tense. unbending. yet, after all the chips are down, rather than doing what you would expect and doubling down, stiffening into a stone statue, all of his body language reverses.

what the hell is that? whats going on? theres something going on here but i dont know what it is.

also, pulling back to the first pose, its weirdly prevalent in other characters. apollo famously has it in his edgelord phase in dual destinies:

ema, disturbingly has it as well:

but you know who also has it? wocky goddamn kitaki. yeah.

maybe it's just because im a bit of a paranoid person. but i saw that sprite recently and went into a full spiral for a hot second. im choosing to take it as a sign of how good The Kristoph Pose was as visual shorthand for Oh Shit. and, maybe to a degree, at demonstrating apollo "nervous energy incarnate" justice's own paranoia because of the whole perceive dealio. cuz lord knows he noticed when ema did it. and when wocky did it. his boss had been doing that while admitting to murder not a month prior. seeing wocky do it with his false bravado definitely raised his blood pressure. and ema was probably even worse, cuz i dont think she does it until after you give her the fingerprint powder and establish her as trustable. like imagine finally having someone on your side that doesnt speak in riddles or swing panties around and thank god youre normal and then. thump. heartbeat goes up. shes doing the thing. shut shes doing it. i know these signs. I've gotta get away i cant get sucked into this again i cant get tricked like this again i cant HAVE this again

and this isnt even getting into the glasses push. the hand devil. the eerie totally normal happy smile sprite. the one where all of his face muscles scrunch up. i dont really have a lot of thoughts on kris as a character but by god do i have thoughts on his spritework. he makes me want to learn to draw so i can drop his poses into things sporadically and use The Pose as shorthand the same way AJAA did

[preyofolympus]

People who say Tim annoyed/ bullied/ tricked his way into being Robin, especially when bitching about comics canon vs fanon, genuinely make me lose my mind.

Like.

How thick can you be?

Tim didn’t even want to be Robin (I heard New 52 was a bit wacky but I’m not looking up his history in that continuity for a quick Tumblr rant). Like, he straight up asked Dick to be Robin, tracked his apartment down and tried to argue his case that Batman needed a Robin, and Gotham needed Batman.

He became Robin because he saw no one else was going to step up to the role, and Batman was spiralling after Jason’s death. Gotham gained a sense of hope with the Batman, and he was a symbol to them of something at least close to good in their messy city. Tim saw that the light Robin brought to the duo helped keep Batman in check to a degree, when his self-restraint wasn’t enough, and with this being so abruptly taken away with Jason death, Batman stopped pulling punches, began to lose sight of being that symbol of hope/ good Gotham needed. He was becoming a force of fear, like there wasn’t already enough fear in Gotham.

So Tim stepped in. He wasn’t instantly Robin after wrestling his way in. He earnt the Robin mantle, and worked bloody hard before Batman finally let him take it on.

I love Tim as a Robin, because he came from a privileged background, had his whole life basically set for him, and he could have easily sat back in Drake Manor, becoming nothing and having everything. But he saw that good needed to be done. He saw no one else was stepping up to do it. And he stepped up to the task.

He is selfless, embodies that optimism/ hope that the Batman symbol is meant to represent (at least at the start, before he loses the mantle). Tim’s Robin is the symbol of doing what is right, even when you don’t have to. Simply because it’s the right thing to do.

It’s two am, and I’m pretty much definitely not saying all my thoughts, and I’m sure I’ll notice a hundred typos when I wake up tomorrow, but goddamn Tim haters irritate me when they act like he is just some rich kid that wanted to be Robin. Like I hate being in drama/ discourse so usually I just shut up, but this recent canon be fanon shit has had me so riled on so many fronts (tbh I think this rant is just blowing off steam at a smaller issue, because I’m sick of seeing idiots on Twitter rag on my friend).

I haven’t fully read Tim’s Robin comics run, as I’m saving that for next Summer, but I’ve still read enough extracts to know this line of argument is just plain stupid, no other word for it.

Also, give up on the fanon vs canon shit. Seriously. It’s embarrassing.

Tldr; Tim didn’t want to be Robin. He stepped up because he saw no one else was doing the right thing. He worked hard before officially taking on the mantle. He saved Batman and Nightwing from the scarecrow, earning their trust to train him. Tim Drake is a hero because he could have easily lived life on the backs of his rich parents and kept his nose out of it, but he didn’t because he cared about Gotham and it’s people. There is no best or worst Robin, and Tim certainly doesn’t deserved to be considered the latter by some idiots who dumb down his journey to becoming Robin to “rich kid who wanted to play hero.”

[v3nusxsky]

I love your writing..🫶🏻 May I request a dom Reader/sub Larissa smut? I’m craving for it haha…sub Larissa just hits different tbh. Something like Larissa discovers this side of her the first time after Reader sort of “overpowers” her during a heated argument in her office and Larissa hates to admit but she likes it immensely..which eventually turns into a heated shameless smutty smut. The plot idea is just a suggestion so it’s totally up to you, so if you have a better idea that’s totally fine😇 Thank you!🫶🏻

Tempers like a flame 18+

*Authors note~ more sub Larissa content for y'all*

Trigger warnings~ sub l dom r reader is able to use magic and often prefers magically shifting their anatomy downstairs to a dick cockwarming edging mommy kink l daddy kink r

Prompt~ see ask^^

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

Larissa had been teasing you all day, she knew just what to say and do to get your not so little friend to stand to attention. When you first told her you were able to change your body parts by magic and that you preferred to have male anatomy downstairs ever once in a while, you were terrified, after all Larissa Weems screamed lesbian. But turns out Larissa loved that special quality about you. Larissa soon mapped all all the ways she could tease you to her memory which meant a lot of painful predicaments for you when in public and at the other end of her teasing.

Today was no different, Larissa had been teasing you all damn day. Honestly, you were not even sure your dick could get any harder at this point, the bulge becoming hard to hide. You wanted your love on it and that's exactly what you'd get you just had to be creative about it. Picking a silly argument would get Larissa to your shared bedroom, your lover never one to back down especially if she thought she's right, that small fact would become extremely useful.

As soon as she entered her words began to spiral, you let her rant a little before shutting her up with your lips on hers, teeth and tongues clashing together in a desperate needy effort to claim one another as her hand slipped to your noticeable bulge. "Daddy, do you need me?" She teased messing the the fly of your trousers. "Oh mommy more than you know, you caused this and your gonna fix it. Now I have work to do so you're gonna come and sit on daddy's big thick cock, warm it up real good"you demanded tugging her over to the desk before freezing your member from its restraints. "O daddy your huge" she mewled at the slight allowing you. Her underwear disappeared and you silently thanked whatever gods made you a witch. Your spells and magic were incredibly useful.

Making quick work of getting your lover settled on your dick you couldn't help but let out a breathy moan of contentment, "feel so good mommy" you mewled as your love whimpered, your size stretching her out. "Be a good girl for daddy and maybe I'll let you come" you murmured before cracking on with work, a hand rubbing at her back in a soothing manner.  For Larissa time had no meaning, it could've been minutes of hours she wasn't sure but she really needed to move, to feel you deeper in her needy cunt. Subtly she tried to rock her hips to get more only to be met with a harsh smack to her thigh, "don't be greedy whore! You've made daddy horny all day now fucking behave" you snapped before attending to your work ignoring your lovers whines in protest.

Only when you finished the work you had to do did you move to press kisses to her neck. "Did so good for me mommy, wanna reward my special subby girl" you murmured laughing at how her hips rutted forward at the last words. "Aw does mommy like being daddy's submissive slutty whore hmm?" You teased her delighting when she moaned happily, "please I don't wanna think, daddy please make me go all fuzzy I'll be good please please" her little whimpers was all it took for you to teleport yourselves to the bed. Again thank you magic is all you could say.

"Come on then whore, fuck yourself on my dick or can you not even do that anymore?" Was all the blonde needed to hear to begin to bounce on your cock. "Daddy fuck feel so good" she mewled and you knew it wouldn't take much to bring her to the edge. "Poor mommy needs to cum" you teased receiving nods and whimpers of pleasure. "Tough hold it" you bit delivering a span to her ass. "Daddy daddy can't please" she mewled cashing you to flip you both over so she was on her back. "Wanna cum then cum slut but I won't be stopping till I'm done filling you to the brim. Think about how pretty you'd look mommy, carrying daddy's babies like a good cumdump."

You continued to pound into the older woman while spewing all the things you wanted to do to her, making her cum over and over again, begging you to stop while begging for more. The poor woman wasn't sure what she wanted anymore but you didn't care, you were close and that was all you could think of. "Gonna cum, gonna breed my pretty whore, fuck take it baby, take daddy's cum deep inside your needy pussy" you panted as you felt spurt after spurt of sticky hot seed shoot up into her fluttering walls of her cunt. "Thank you daddy" she slurred as you slipped out of her. "You're welcome baby, daddy's gonna plug your pretty pussy so you don't waste any of daddy's treat" you murmured before magically producing the plug and carefully inserted into her gaping hole as your mixed cums dribbled out. "Did good Ris, get some sleep love" you murmured while you made your way back up to hold the spent woman to your chest. "I love you" you both whispered at the same time before laughing and drifting off to sleep together.

Word count~ 1031