#to see if they’re playing their roles correctly

[superbat-love]

Good Cop/Bad Cop

[munson-blurbs]

Hi buggy!! I had an idea and I feel like you are the perfect person to give it to (as you know I have way too many WIPS)

Okay so -Drama Club!Reader taking a nap on the couch in the room they use for Hellfire- She’s got headphones on so she doesn’t hear them come in- Halfway through the game Eddie realizes ? There’s someone in the room? And then he drives her home? Run with it honestly! Also ILY!!

You know I love any excuse to write fluff 🥰 for you, my dear.

Warnings: none really, just tooth-rotting fluff and the Hellfire boys teasing Eddie

WC: 1.5k

Sleepiness hits you like a truck. No matter how many plays you do, no matter if you have a leading role or you’re part of the chorus, post-show exhaustion is real. There’s no break between the infamous “Hell Week” and opening night, and you are feeling it.

Your knees buckle like your legs are going to give out. Despite the upbeat tempo of Joan Jett’s I Love Rock ‘n Roll blasting through your headphones, which typically puts some pep in your step, you’re about to fall over.

As you pass by the drama room, it dawns on you: there’s a couch that’s perfect (or at least feasible) for a quick little nap.

Luckily for you, it’s completely empty, and sleep quickly overtakes you. No lines to memorize, no scrambling to stage left when Mr. Underwood calls for the Mad Hatter. Just pure, uninterrupted–

“Oh, come on!”

Well. 

You’re jolted awake by the sound of a group of guys shouting at each other. As your vision focuses, you can see that they’re all wearing matching shirts, proudly proclaiming themselves to be the Hellfire Club. You don’t know how long you’ve been asleep, but your cassette is no longer playing music, so it has to have been a little while.

The voice that had woken you from your nap belongs to Nancy Wheeler’s younger brother, Mike, who is currently raking his hands through his shaggy hair in frustration. 

“Okay, okay, just focus.” Will Byers, ever the voice of reason. He was one of the set designers for Alice in Wonderland, and his kind disposition effectively made him the adopted little brother of most of the upperclassmen. He picks up a die, takes a deep breath, and rolls, letting out a disappointed groan as it clatters to the table. “Shit!”

“That’s…a…miss!” Your attention is immediately drawn to the man sitting in a throne-esque chair at the head of the table, cackling at Will’s misfortune. You nearly fall off of the couch when you see that it’s Eddie Munson, the guy you’ve had a crush on since you’d started high school four years ago.

“Careful, Eddie,” one of the younger members–Gareth, if you’re remembering correctly–goads the Dungeon Master,  “you’d better be nice to him, or he won’t introduce you to your lady love.”

The rest of them oooh and make kissy noises, laughing amongst themselves.

Eddie slams a fist on the table, silencing them immediately. “Shut up!” he roars, scrunching up his nose in anger. His sudden outburst startles you; luckily, everyone is too engrossed in the game–and teasing Eddie–to notice the way you twitch on the couch.

The game continues for a few more minutes, punctuated by cheers and irritated grunts, before Will speaks up. “She’s really nice, Eddie,” he starts, “I could see if she’d wanna talk to you—”

“Enough!” Eddie hisses through gritted teeth. “I swear, I’ll end this campaign right now.”

“Hold on,” another freshman, this one with curly hair, chimes in. He raises his forefinger as he contemplates the situation. “You’re telling me that you went to see Alice in Wonderland–twice, I may add–stared at her the whole time, and you don’t even wanna know if she’s interested?”

That gets your attention—what drama club actress does he have his eye on? Probably Chrissy Cunningham, the blonde beauty who’d snagged the leading role. Cheerleading, acting, all-around nice person; who wouldn’t have a crush on her?

Eddie shakes his head, frizzy curls brushing the shoulders of his denim jacket. “You idiots are driving me crazy.”

Jeff, who happens to be in your English class, throws him a knowing smirk. “Don’t you mean, driving you mad?”

His pun earns him a round of high-fives from his friends, but Eddie is less than enthused. 

“That’s it; we’re done here.” Eddie smacks his palms to the table, rolling his eyes when the guys groan. “I’ll clean up, just—get out of here. Go!” He yells the last word when no one moves, and they all scramble for their backpacks and out the door. 

Once they leave, he starts tossing game pieces back in the box haphazardly, mumbling to himself. 

“Fuckin’ kids, think they know everything just because they have girlfriends—Jesus Christ!”

Your eyes flit over to see him staring at you, hand pressed to his chest as he catches his breath. 

“Wh-What the fuck are you doing here?” he stammers, trying to catch his breath. “When did you even get here?”

“I, um, needed a nap,” you admit, “and I knew there was a couch here, but I dozed off for too long…I didn’t mean to crash your game,” you finish lamely.

“Oh,” Eddie grins, relieved that you’ve been asleep and blissfully ignorant of the ribbing he’d received during Hellfire, “yeah, I mean, no worries. ‘S, uh, comfy.”

You wrinkle your nose. “Not really. I was just tired.”

“Yeah, makes sense,” Eddie sputters with a forced laugh, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Just finished the play and everything. ‘S a lot of work.”

“Yup.” There’s an awkward pause before you speak again. “Well, I should probably head home before my mom reports me missing or something.”

“I can drive you!” Eddie blurts out, cringing inwardly at the abundance of enthusiasm in his tone. “I mean, ‘s cool with me if you wanna…bum a ride.”

You tilt your head with a small smile. “Are you sure? I don’t want you to go out of your way…” You know that he lives in Forest Hills Trailer Park across town, and you don’t want him wasting time and fuel when you could easily walk.

“No, yeah, I don’t mind.” He rocks back and forth on his heels nervously. “I, uh, actually wanted to ask you about the play.”

You nod, grabbing your backpack from the side of the couch. Before you can sling it over your shoulder, his hand shoots out to catch the strap at the top. 

“I can carry it.”

“Eddie Munson…chivalrous gentleman?” you tease, unaware of the shiver coursing through him when you say his full name. “Full of surprises today.”

You follow him to his van, smiling politely when he opens your door for you with a small bow. He jogs around to his side and climbs into the driver’s seat.

“Where to?”

You give him your address and offer a general direction. “So, what did you wanna ask me?”

“Hm?”

You raise your eyebrows. “You said you wanted to drive me home so you could ask me about the play.”

“Oh, yeah! Right.” Eddie fumbles for his words. “Is it hard remembering all your lines?”

You shrug. “Not too bad. Kinda like studying for a test, y’know?”

“Uh, sure.” He puts his hand on the back of your seat and turns his head, tongue poking out from between his lips as he concentrates on backing out.

Another pregnant pause fills the air, and you rub your palms along your jean-clad thighs. “What else did you wanna know?”

He wracks his brain for more questions, but comes up short. “That was pretty much it, I guess.”

“Eddie!” you scoff playfully. “I wouldn’t have had you drive me if you only had one question!” Without thinking, your hand swats at his chest.

“Ow! Damn!” he laughs, using one hand to tend to his ‘wound’ while keeping the other on the wheel. “I’m gonna have to tell Byers that you’re actually really mean.”

“Me?”

“Mhm,” he confirms. “Violent, too. ‘S probably gonna leave a mark.”

“Poor baby.” You jut out your lower lip in an exaggerated pout. “Need someone to nurse you back to health?” You take a beat before proposing, “Maybe…Chrissy Cunningham?”

Eddie coughs out a laugh. “Chrissy Cunningham? Yeah, no.”

“Really?” You furrow your brow in confusion. “Then who were the guys talking about?” The question comes out before you can stop it, and you feel your face heat up with embarrassment. “Sorry, I–”

“‘S fine,” he mutters, drumming his fingers on the wheel. His ears tinge pink and he gnaws on his cheek, but doesn’t say another word.

Something dawns on you; a comment he’d made earlier in the drive. “I’m gonna have to tell Byers that you’re actually really mean.” And back at Hellfire, Will had said that Eddie’s drama club crush was “really nice.” And then there was Jeff’s comment about them driving him mad…

Oh.

“Do you wanna get some pizza or something?” you ask, the words spilling from your lips. You peer at him hopefully, trying not to sound overzealous. “Y’know, just so I can make sure your injury isn’t fatal.”

He nods. “Yeah, sounds awesome. I like pizza.” His gaze flits over to your hand; he reaches over and timidly gives it a small squeeze. “Like you, too.”

Your body fills with warmth, and you settle back into your seat and smile. Yeah, that nap was definitely a great idea.

--

[theywhowriteandknowthings]

Warning: Discourse incoming.

I told myself I’d never get involved in these kinds of discussion because I’m a firm believer in “You do you/No Kink shaming etc.” But this one is a fairly serious one. It’s long, I’m not putting a cut in there, but please just hear me out.

There’s a disturbing trend in some fic writing I’ve noticed lately, and I have to say something about it.

We all know I’m a sucker for dark fics, be it CNC, dubcon, even non-con and horror elements, so I’m not here trying to tone/content police people’s writing. I want to make it very clear that this is not about vilifying people who write dark stuff, or things I’m not into. Hell, if I don’t want to read something, I check the tags and warnings and nope out before I get the ick. (As everyone should, there’s no point getting yourself wound up or triggered by content you can just simply scroll by.) 

However, this is where my current concern comes in. 

I’ve seen lots of very prominent writers not giving adequate warnings or disclaimers about the content they write. 

I’ve come across a lot of content where Joel (sorry buddy you’re the worst offender here, Ilu tho) is being labelled as a dom – and even more worryingly labelled as a soft dom – when the relationship is not about safe dom/sub relationships/kink. 

If Joel is spanking you so hard you can’t sit down in lieu of “teaching you a lesson” when there’s clear lack of enthusiastic consent (or often any consent at all) this is not s/m, this is abuse. 

If you’re having your readers receive physical or sexual punishment for actual life slip ups/non-role play scenarios, you’re glorifying abuse.

If you’re not labelling your fics correctly, you’re being negligent to your readers, and this should be a safe space for us all to read and create without being unduly triggered because we had inadequate or no forewarning.

For example:

Javi P kisses a girl, you make him pay for it in a way that is clearly pre-established (you have to spell it out people) as consensual in your relationship? Kink.

Joel spanking the shit out of you because a man flirted with you in a bar? Abuse. 

Din edging you until you cry because you were competing in how much you could make the other jealous in a pre-agreed dynamic? Kink. 

Joel denying you sex, or fucking you without prep/making you cum because you did something to annoy him/he doesn’t agree with and you aren’t enjoying yourself? Abuse.

I thought we were over this with the discourse that came about around 50 Shades, but clearly not. So please, tag your fics with appropriate/adequate warnings. As a survivor of sexual abuse and grooming, I need to know if your fic is going to contain and/or glorify these things. Again, I’m not saying don’t write these things, but it is your responsibility to tag adequately.

It’s a simple concept that I see applied across the board with age gaps and power dynamics, and most of the time people get it right. But when posts with 1k+ interactions are explicitly abusive, with no warnings other than S/M dynamics or “soft dom!Joel” when it’s anything but soft, aren’t just triggering to some, they’re harmful.

You can’t have a healthy relationship with Joel (again sorry buddy) if that relationship contains thinly veiled or brazen abusive elements. 

If you don’t know the difference between coercive behaviour, sexual or physical abuse, and safe, consensual kink, you need to educate yourself for your own benefit, and that of your readers. 

Feel free to reach out to chat with me about this, I’m not here to run and gun, but I will not tolerate any form of abuse or unkindness (on either side of the aisle) here.

[pedropascalsx]

Dabble request: F reader with Dieter Bravo. He finally wins a major award and the reader decides to award him with smutty sex

THE AWARD.

I slightly changed it and had them enter a bet… I hope that’s okay and I hope you like it. Also you sent this in April and I missed it, i’m so sorry it took so long.

Summary: you jokingly bet that you’ll fuck your best friend dieter bravo if he wins an oscar.

Warnings: Smut. P in V. Oral. (M&F receiving). Betting. Strong language. Dieter Bravo being… Dieter Bravo.

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x F! Reader.

Word Count: 2053

A/N: I tried LOL. Thank you to @littlebirdsbookshelf for reading an unfinished version of this fic and encouraging me to finish it. I didn’t edit it and I’m too scared to read it back… so I don’t know how many mistakes are in it 😭😂 ENJOY!!

You groan as your phone wakes you up from the most comfortable sleep you’ve had in weeks, before reluctantly kicking off your covers and stepping out of bed.

The photo of Dieter Bravo's smug face flashing up on your phone screen makes you roll your eyes and curse his name before you swipe to answer. “It’s 5AM Diet, if someone isn’t dead, you’re able to be,” you growl into the phone.

“Shut up,” he says with an obnoxious chuckle, “I’m cashing in on our bet, pretty girl.”

“What?” You say before stuttering, “No. Not today, I’m not playing any of your annoying games this early.. . I’m hanging up and I'm going back to sleep, asshat.” You say, with a wide smile spreading across your face from the sound of his chuckling.

“I can hear you smiling.” He remarks and you roll your eyes again at how easily he can read you.

“What do you want, Dieter? I’m tired.”

“I already told you, I’m cashing in on our bet. March 21st 2015. You said you’d fuck me when I win an Academy Award.” Dieter recalls, his voice dripping with its usual arrogance.

“Buying a fake one from Etsy doesn’t count,” you sigh, imagining he’s just dragged himself back to his hotel from some club, “Dieter, if you haven’t already, go to bed, get so—.”

“I’m nominated,” he interrupts, ignoring the irritation in your voice, “My agent called me fifteen minutes ago. For Hunger Strike - Best Leading Actor.”

“Dieter, you better not be fucking with me.” You squeal with excitement, almost jumping up and down on the spot.

“Not yet, I’m not, pretty girl.”

“When are you home?” You ask, suddenly forgetting how tired you are.

“Eager are we?” He says, his eyebrows raising and the first real smile forming across his face in weeks despite his nomination.

“Shut up, asshat, you’ve got to fucking win the thing first… and if I recall correctly, which I do, I think I said I’d consider fucking you if you ever win one and I only said it so you’d take that damn role.”

“Mhmm. Nope. I don’t think I’ve ever heard the word ‘consider’ fall from those gorgeous lips before now,” he teases. “But jokes aside… Tell me you’ll come with me, I hate those fucking things, they’re only fun if you’re swooning over how handsome I am in a suit sitting next to me.”

“Shut up, asshat.”

“Come with me, pretty girl, put those shiny statues to shame, show them how you shine brighter.” He says, unaware of just how fucking cheesy he ends up sounding.

“Only if you buy me a burger after.” You say, glad he isn’t there to see the way you’re unable to stop yourself from smiling.

“Deal.”

*

You haven’t left his side for the past few days, he had asked you quietly to stay with him while he went through the required amount of press and you had made sure that your hand was close enough for him to squeeze when he needed it.

And today was no different, the confident Dieter Bravo the whole world thinks that they know, nowhere to be seen and instead the sweet Dieter that a few people have the pleasure of knowing sits beside you, looking at the dress bag containing the tuxedo he’ll be adorning in just a few hours time.

“You okay?” You ask, quietly bumping your shoulder against his.

“Ask me again when this is all over,” he says, before taking a generous sip of his drink. “I fucking hate red carpets.”

You take his hand and squeeze it a few times, before resting your head on those broad shoulders that you love so much.

“Whatever happens tonight, I’m really fucking proud of you.” You murmur into his skin, “Always have been, you’re the best friend i’ve ever had.”

He shushes you before pressing a kiss to the top of your head, grateful that you’re with him. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

“Let’s do this.” You say, with a little scrunch of your nose.

*

“And the Academy Award goes to… Dieter Bravo.” The gorgeous actress announces and you swear you can hear his heart beating.

He stands slowly, fiddling with the front of his jacket before turning to face you, immediately smashing his lips to yours in a fleeting kiss that steals your breath before shaking the hand of his director and making his way to the stage.

His speech is short but insightful. He makes sure to make eye contact with you as he thanks you for encouraging him to take the role and then shuffles off the stage as quickly as he can.

“Will you be mad if I suggest we skip the after party?” He asks after they finish engraving his oscar, the award ceremony now over and more hands shook than he could possibly be bothered to count.

“Not at all,” you say, resting your head against his shoulder, and inspecting his shiny new award.

“Room service burgers and a shitty movie to fall asleep in front of?” He suggests, before wrapping his hand around your waist.

“Sounds like heaven.”

*

“It’s really fucking pretty,” you say, your hands wrapped around the statue.

“Yeah,” he says, from somewhere behind you. Unable to stop his eyes from scanning up and down your body, and unable to ignore the way his heart leaps everytime he looks at you. “Second prettiest thing in this room.”

“I’d call you a charmer, but I'm pretty certain you’re about to announce that you’re in first place,” you say, turning around to face him with a giggle and a signature scrunch of your nose.

“No. It’s you.” He says, “In every room. It’s you.”

“Charmer.”

You both stand in comfortable silence for a few moments, just staring at each other before you take a step towards him. “Academy award winner, Dieter Bravo.”

“The one and only,” he scoffs, with a roll of his eyes. “You look really fucking beautiful by the way.”

“Shut up, asshat.” You mumble, now standing toe to toe. Unable to stop thinking about the bet that you had made a few years earlier, one that neither of you had mentioned since the day he was nominated.

He’s been your best friend for years. You met on the set of his very first movie, while working as a makeup artist and immediately struck up a friendship. And while there has always been an obvious attraction between you both, the fear that making a move and acting on it could potentially ruin your friendship had kept those feelings at bay.

But standing here and seeing the way that he’s looking at you, you can’t hold back, so you don’t. You surge forward and capture his lips, kissing him with the same intensity he had kissed you with earlier this evening, but this time it didn’t have to be fleeting. His mouth swallows your moans and his hands start to roam your body, squeezing and grabbing anywhere they could as he kisses you back.

He carefully pulls down the zipper on the back of your dress, dragging it slowly and savouring every second of this moment, a moment he’s been dreaming of since first laying eyes on you.

“Dieter,” you murmur softly against his jaw, wanting him to increase his painfully slow pace of undressing you. “Please.”

He increases his pace, frantically pulling on the material and letting it pool at your feet, before helping you step out of it and guiding you backwards towards the bedroom. His hands still greedily grabbing at any and every part of you as he lays you down.

He wastes exactly no time, pulling your panties off in one clear sweep and diving his head in between your legs. The noises he makes are loud and desperate as he laps at your clit with a messy intensity. Alternating between licking and sucking your little bud, only satisfied when you’re screaming his name and tugging at his signature messy locks before soaking his face with your arousal.

You whimper his name as he continues to lap at your clit, before gently pushing him away as it gets too much. Giggling slightly at the sight of his soaked face.

“Are you planning on getting undressed?” You ask as he moves up your body.

“Not this round,” he growls, before capturing your lips again. His movements are sloppy as he fumbles with his belt, pulling it through the loops and throwing it across the room, before pulling his pants down enough to expose his cock. You push him back slightly, and lay down in front of him on your tummy, a moan slipping out as you take a good look at his cock. Thick, long and throbbing. The tip flushed red with a bead of pre-cum, you lean forward, push up the bottom of his shirt and pepper light kisses on the swell of his tummy, nipping a few times before taking him in your mouth.

He groans your name as you hollow your cheeks, your jaw immediately aching from the sheer width of him and slowly you start to bob your head. Gagging slightly as he rocks his hips and pushes past your tonsils. The snap of his hips meet the rhythm of your enthusiastic mouth. After a few minutes he groans impatiently at not being able to touch you, before pulling out your mouth leaning over you and slapping your ass and then spreading your cheeks and tasting you this way.

You take him in your hand, stroking and flicking your wrist in perfect strokes, moaning his name in a perfect little chant as he uses his nose to tease your clit. You cum with a yelp of his name, taking you both by surprise as he soothes you through the aftershocks with gentle coos and little flicks of his tongue against your pretty little clit.

“On your back, pretty girl,” he orders, giving himself a few rough strokes as he watches you. “You ready for me, baby?” He says with a waggle of his eyebrows.

“I'm ready,” you confirm with a giggle, yelping with excitement as he pushes into you. Praising your ‘perfect little pussy’ as he fills you to the hilt. His arms swoop beneath your knees, so he can fuck into your deeper. “Move, D,” you beg as he waits, wanting you to adjust to the size of him.

The second you give him permission, he’s rolling his hips back, watching your face intently before snapping them forward. Loving the sound of your pretty moans as he thrusts back into you. He bends over and presses his lips against your face, thrusting himself in and out of you. Finding that spot and dragging his cock against it with ease, loving how reactive and tight your pussy gets around him.

“Oh Dieter,” you whimper, almost delirious with pleasure.

“I know, fuck, I know, baby girl,” he murmurs, “Taking my fat cock so well, baby.” You love how vocal he is, the sound of both of your moans filling the room. “You know how many times I’ve dreamed of this?” He whispers into your ear. “Every fucking day, since I met you.”

“Me too,” you stutter, seconds before your pussy clamps down around him and everything goes black. White hot pleasure erupting behind your eyes and his name becoming the only word you can speak.

It's a pleasure like you’ve never experienced, you feel him everywhere and you still want more and more. He keeps his pace as steady for as long as he can but his hips begin to falter, his pace more stilted as his cock begins to throb and he pulls out.

Stroking his cock hard and fast as he pants your cunt with thick pearly ropes of his cum.

“Holy shit.” You say with a giggle, “Even better than I imagined, D.”

“Me too,” he says as he collapses on top of you, leaning his weight onto his elbows. Kissing you gently, before nuzzling his face into your neck.

“So how was your night?” You ask with a giggle. “End as good as it started.”

“A million times better.” He says quietly.

You giggle loudly, “Better than winning the most coveted award in acting?”

“Not even a competition. You would win every time.”

[universal-imagines]

❀ ﹝ hands & touches ﹞

i. hanagaki takemichi

out of everyone else in the group he has the softest touch

his hands aren’t as familiar with the calluses that come from ripping a metal pipe out of an opponent’s hand, or the splinters of a broken a bat, his fingers aren’t stiff from throwing one too many punches either

they also aren’t that noteworthy if you’re being honest, but they’re warm. the kind of warmth that makes you feel secure, like no danger can come to you, they feel like home

his one scar gets all of your attention though, you like to trace it with your fingers not only because you admire him for going through that and still standing his ground, but because it always earns you a cute blush from him

if you throw in some compliments you’ll even get some tears, which he fails at hiding because he’s sniffling like a child

but you find it endearing, it’s the main reason you fell for him, seeing how open he is with his emotions

ii. ryuguji ken aka “draken”

just as you’d expect he has big hands with long slender fingers, the kind that can engulf your whole hand in a fist

but he’s always careful not to hurt you and he does it with such tenderness you wonder if he thinks you fragile, you reassure him you are not by intertwining your fingers with his and holding his hand firmly in place, so tightly it feels like you’re trying to dig your nails into the back of his hand. it usually results in him chuckling and squishing your hand playfully

one time he put a bit too much force into it and you got a taste of his strength, the yelp that parted your lips was more dramatic than intended and you almost felt guilty over the look that crossed his face but when he touched his lips to your knuckles you continued to play the role of the victim

but that’s only in the privacy of his room, outside of those four walls the closest you get to him is bumping shoulders as you walk, and the occasional ruffling of hair. it’s not that he’s not affection or doesn’t care to show how much you mean to him, but he figures you know how he feels so he doesn’t have to put on a show for everyone else 

however, when you are feeling down or he notices your attention is elsewhere he pokes you on the forehead (with some force) to reel you back in, grinning when your head snaps back into place

iii. baji keisuke 

the first thing you noticed of baji’s was of course his hair, it’s kind of hard not to when it’s so long and shiny. how in the world does it looks so nice, you will never know, but the second thing that called your attention were his hands

something about them was attractive, but it wasn’t their size because they weren’t that big in comparison to others and his fingers weren’t slender or long

what made them so special was how wide they were, it just made them look manly, like they could take a beating and still be just as strong

and boy did they take a beating with him resorting to violence to solve all his problems, they were even rough to the touch, definitely not the kind of hands you want a massage from and yet, they were perfect

you’ve lost count of how many times you’ve touched your hand to his to compare sizes, but also to get some kind of reaction out of him

back when he was giving it his all in his classes you took advantage of him asking you for help to take his hand in your and guide it over the paper. you got to know every scratch and mark he had, in addition to just how many words he did not know how to write out correctly

he didn’t like the teasing, but even though he didn’t voice it out loud he enjoyed your touch, so he still asks you to help him write the words he’s already learned. can’t outright ask you to hold his hand now can he?

iv. matsuno chifuyu

chifuyu’s hands are probably the smallest ones of the gang, and while that doesn’t mean they are tiny by any means, you have noticed that his pinky is smaller in comparison to the rest of his fingers. it is even smaller than yours even though all his other fingers are slightly longer than yours. and it becomes even more obvious when he wears gloves because his pinky doesn’t reach the tip. you think it’s the cutest thing

when it comes to hand holding chifuyu tends to hide away from it in front of others, he knows they’ll tease him for it but every now and then he’ll link his pinky to yours 

it’s as close as he’s willing to go in front of the gang but it still sends both of your hearts into a frenzy. maybe one day he’ll get the courage to just grab your hand and show off to the others how happy he is

the fact that he reaches out himself makes you unbelievably happy though, it’s as if he can read your mind. every time you glance at his hand it is only a matter of seconds before he’s reaching for your pinky

sometimes you’re looking at it out of concern, more often than not his fingers are decorated with a mess of band aids. you’ve told him plenty of times that it’d be easier to wrap them, but he says the band aids look cooler and he can switch them out faster 

v. mitsuya takashi

it’s as if mitsuya’s hands were crafted just as delicately as he crafts his designs, despite the amount of fights he’s gotten into his hands are still so smooth and elegant

maybe it’s because you’ve watched him work countless hours and have gotten to admire the ease in which his fingers move to get the perfect stitch, but his hands are the most beautiful things you’ve set your eyes on

his nails never seem to grow but you know it’s because he’s always cutting them so they don’t get snagged on any fabric, it also helps that he doesn’t have to worry about them breaking or chipping when fighting 

of course you’re the first and only person he comes to when he needs to bandage them up, he doesn’t trust anyone else to do it. the one time he let one of the guys do it they wrapped his fingers a bit too tight and he wasn’t able to bend them, so it made sewing hard and annoying

but you know how to wrap them perfectly, it admittedly took several attempts and you weren’t that great in the beginning, but over time you got it down, you even massage his hands from time to time to help him release all the tension

in turn he takes any chance to hold your hand and give it a small squeeze to show his appreciation for you and it never fails to put a smile on your face

[emotionallychargedtowel]

Hira's parents and his self-defeating tendencies

I was talking to @sorry-bonebag and @wen-kexing-apologist about what role Hira's parents might have played in creating the weirdness he displays throughout both seasons of Utsukushii Kare & Eternal. I started writing a response and it got too long and, well, now it's a post.

Before I talk about Hira's parents and the tendencies in him that they helped to create, I want to note that family of origin is just one of the influences that form us as people. Parents and caregivers have a huge influence, as do other family members. But so do peers. The bullying about his disability that Hira experiences nearly constantly is one of the biggest influences on his personality.

Hira's parents appear extremely briefly at the very beginning of the series. His mom fusses a bit about him being on his own and his dad is very "he has to take care of himself sometime" about it. We know they took him to specialists for his dysphemia, bought him his camera, etc.

Their departure is a show thing, by the way, and isn't present in the novel. In the novel they continue to live with him through high school and, if I remember correctly, part of college. But they don't play a big role in his life. The main things that happen involving them are either instances of Hira hiding things from them (or attempting to) or instances of his mother briefly, sporadically, having a big burst of worry about him. It would make sense if the show version of his parents were the same way aside from the leaving-him-to-live-alone part of things, though that’s not shown.

The rest of my thoughts are largely headcanon since I’m working backwards from his personality to guess about his formative years, but they match up with the little bit that’s shown in the series and how his parents are in the novel. I see Hira as having a self-defeating personality in a lot of ways. The typical etiology of this kind of personality (the set of conditions that lead up to it) is supposed to be a rather deprived childhood that is punctuated by occasional bursts of parental attention when the child is seen as in crisis somehow (or when they attract attention in other self-defeating ways, like intentionally getting in trouble).

This reminds me of something Nancy McWilliams writes about in Psychoanalytic Diagnosis, attributing the idea to someone named Emmanuel Hammer: “a masochistic person is a depressive who still has hope.” [I should note here that “masochistic personality” is an older term for self-defeating personality that is not meaningfully correlated with masochism in a sexual sense. I think that, despite how he might appear at first glance, Hira actually isn’t sexually masochistic or submissive. I have a whole mostly-written post about this that I hope will see the light of day eventually.] In other words, whereas the background that creates a depressive personality involves deprivation that's intense enough that the person gives up on the possibility of receiving the love they need, the self-defeating personality has had enough success with occasionally getting their needs met that they keep trying. If that’s what happened with Hira, it would be consistent with what we see of his parents in the series. We know they pulled out the stops at certain points when it comes to his dysphemia. Anyone who’s a parent can tell you how hard it is to get a good specialist to see your kid, even when they have some kind of glaring issue and you have decent healthcare access overall. The fact that they managed to get him in with a specialist is notable all on it own. (I actually have some stressful phone calls I need to make today in a similar vein, seeking specialist help for one of my kids.) They also spent a lot of money on a DSLR for a young kid. And yet they’re OK with letting him live alone and after that point remain very hands-off. It also seems like despite the attention they paid to his dysphemia during that one period, by the time of the series they’ve totally stopped trying to support him about it.

Basically, I think his parents are largely neglectful (emotionally rather than materially) but that every so often, they freak out and pay a bunch of attention to him because they perceive him to be in need of rescuing. When he was young, he probably appreciated the attention when it happened, but at the time of the series he gets those needs met in other ways and/or displaces that need for attention onto Kiyoi. The idea of seeking attention in this way maps especially well onto his relationship with Kiyoi, because he seeks Kiyoi’s attention and approval through exactly the sort of strategies typically used by people with self-defeating personalities. Here’s McWilliams again:

Reik (1941) explored several dimensions of masochistic acting out, including (1) provocation [she refers to a previous anecdote about a woman who feared angry outbursts by her partner because of experiences with her father; she would act out in ways that antagonized him in order to “get it over with”], (2) appeasement (“I’m already suffering, so please withhold any further punishment”), (3) exhibitionism (“Pay attention: I’m in pain”), and (4) deflection of guilt (“See what you made me do!”).

I can think of plenty of instances of provocation (the first type). Hira often does things he knows will make Kiyoi angry, and sometimes visibly relishes the negative attention.

One good example is the scene in Eternal where he creates a totally avoidable misunderstanding by vaguely talking about how “a divorce is going to happen” because of an affair, which Kiyoi takes to be referring to their relationship and specifically, to Hira cheating. When Kiyoi rears back to punch him, Hira protests for a moment but then says being killed by Kiyoi is actually a longstanding wish of his. It turns out it’s Naho-chan who is getting divorced because her husband cheated. Hira could easily have spoken more clearly when he brought this up by using subjects in his sentences. When he first brings up divorce, Kiyoi says, “Who are you to decide on your own without me agreeing? What dissatisfaction do you have with me?”, which makes it clear he thinks Hira is referring to something involving him. Yet Hira continues to speak without subjects when he elaborates and says the reason for the divorce is an affair. He only clears up the misunderstanding after Kiyoi has lost all patience and is (legitimately!) freaking out. There's no way this isn't, on some level, intentional.

One version of appeasement (the second type of self-defeating acting out) that McWilliams talks about is criticizing oneself before others can do so. It’s no exaggeration to say that Hira talking himself down to Kiyoi is a defining characteristic of their relationship. There are lots of examples of this but a particularly classic case is his constant refrain about being a “pebble.” His invitation for Kiyoi to “Please hit me as much as you want” after their fight in season 2 is another example of appeasement. 

It’s hard to pin down specific examples of Hira employing the third type of acting out, exhibitionism. It makes sense that it wouldn’t be, though. This is a very covert type of exhibitionism that doesn’t announce itself. I think you can observe it in subtle ways, though. For example, when Shirota dumps tomato juice on Kiyoi, a bunch of it gets on Hira as well. Afterwards, Kiyoi cleans the juice off of himself as best he can, seemingly as quickly as possible, and changes his clothes. But when he talks to Hira afterward, dried drops of juice are clearly visible on Hira’s face. Acidic juice on one’s face would probably feel uncomfortable, but he intentionally doesn’t wash it off. It’s like he’s wearing these stains as a badge of honor and proof of his mistreatment.

I think deflection of guilt, the fourth type, is less characteristic of Hira than the others. He tends to absorb guilt rather than deflecting it, blaming himself in a way that often takes the form of the self-critical form of appeasement.

I think it's worth noting that he also employs appeasement as a strategy in the hostile environment of high school. His biggest rule in school is to avoid attention as much as possible, so exhibitionism and provocation aren't acceptable options. (He does disobey Shirota in a way that could be considered provocation when the rift between Kiyoi and Shirota first starts to form, but I think that's more a case of overt rebellion.) We don't see him employ deflection of guilt, though his teacher does seem a bit more forgiving of his attack on Shirota given what he knows about Hira's experiences with bullying. But appeasement? When he can't avoid attention entirely, that is his go-to strategy. It doesn't draw much, if any, additional attention this way. He can demonstrate to people who pose a danger to him that he's not a threat and is ready to comply with their orders if it will allow him to avoid mistreatment. It's only when he finds a kind of vicarious strength in Kiyoi (see my post here for more on that aspect of Hira) that he starts to deal with the bullying in other ways.

So, yeah. Hira's parents initially formed these patterns in Hira, peers deepened them, and they came out in his relationship with Kiyoi. A big part of the shift that needs to happen in order for their relationship to last is for Hira to stop using self-defeating strategies to sneakily get his needs met by Kiyoi and start seeking what he needs openly and assertively.

Maybe now would be a good time to brush off those other in-progress Utsukare posts and try to finish them off while I have a bit of momentum, huh?

By the way, if you’re interested in my previous Utsukare posts, I have a master post here with links to everything.

[7ndipity]

I thought about something and I can't help but laugh 😆

I'm absolutely terrified with spiders and I really hate wasps. Sometimes, when I see a spider on me, I slap it away with a hysterical scream. So imagine if the spider lands on one of the members!🤣 our poor Hobi🤣🤣 he would be sooo terrified!🤣

I know it's not nice to do that but I'm really scared whenever I see a spider. Sometimes, I even cry and can't breathe correctly. I've panic attack if the spider is bigger than a nail. It's weird but I can't control my fear. So sometimes, I just slap them away to protect myself.

Spider Landing on Them

Warnings: Mentions of spiders(obvi), just crack

A/N: I was the same way when I was younger(still kinda am, tbh). Like I can appreciate them for their design/role in nature and all, but I really don’t want them on me.(Also, I wrote this as a crack post, cause we need a laugh.)

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin: He would be screaming and flailing all over the place, you’re risking your own safety trying to get close enough to help him.

Yoongi: I feel like he’d be pretty chill about it, just knocks it off or moves it to a plant like it’s no big deal. Uses it as a metaphor on the next album.

Hobi: He’s flipping the fuck out just like Jin, screaming so loud that he’s setting off car alarms. Needs about three days to recover.

Namjoon: If it's just a lil guy, he’ll be cool and move it to a plant or smth. If it’s big tho, he’s swatting and cursing all over the place, probably breaks a lamp.

Jimin: He goes through about fifty ideas of how to get it off him(a few including a flame thrower), before just swatting it and running.

Taehyung: Legit fakes a heart attack and plays dead in hopes it’ll run away in shame. If that doesn’t work, he just swats it.

Jungkook: He kinda likes bugs, so I think he’d be calm. Gives it a name, takes it to dinner and drops it back at home. They’re going out again on Friday.

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[thoughtfulchaos773]

I'm obsessed with the concept of time on this show since it's one of the themes of this slow burn.

Since season 1- with the sound of the alarm in the pilot, time looms over Carmy's head.

This is also a tool used to set Carmy and Sydney's relationship apart from the rest. The viewers can't consider her like family because he still makes time for Sydney, and when he doesn't make time for her, shit hits the fan throughout the show.

This concept of time is prominent in season 2 and it shows up as-

18 weeks until friends and family. Sydney wants to hire Natalie, and Natalie says time could be better on her side. Time is presented with clocks around Claire and scheduling issues with plumbing and drywall. Time is against Donna to prepare a festive meal. For Carmy, he needs to spend his time correctly. It's checking the efficiency of the stove and island placements, and it's Carmy trying to be present. For Sydney, it's having a short amount of time to lead her team to victory and always wondering if she has enough time to be successful.

Along with the clocks in season 2, there's the theme Every Second Counts, which shows how time is perceived differently for most of the characters on the show.

For Marcus, every second counts is having more time with his mom. It's about where you spend time, who you’re spending it with, and if being a chef is worth the time.

For Richie, time reminds him that not much has changed, and in Forks and through Chef Terry, it’s not about being too late to live life; it’s finding ways to have more time well spent.

From Chef Terry's dad, Every Second Counts is embracing the moment.  Hundreds of entries with details about Palm trees he'd seen, escargot he tried, how purple the ocean was. And he signed each one the same every time.

But every second counts against Sydney and Carmy. Their anxiousness sees that time can sometimes move too fast to really embrace the moment. It's their quick-paced lifestyle as chefs and a reminder that they don’t have much of it. Sense of Urgency is the motto.

That is until they’re near each other. The audience even gets a reprieve with Sydney and Carmy on screen because they're also experiencing time standing still together. When they can focus on each other, it becomes plentiful and expands so they can develop their relationship.

Now I'm excited to see what role time plays with season 3- will there be so little of it, and will we continue to see the consequences of Sydney and Carmy not making time for each other? Or will Carmy, with his lesson learned, attempt to make more time for Sydney?

[mulberriesandtea]

A VERY DISORGANIZED AND WEIRD MESS OF THOUGHTS THAT ARE ALL RELATED TO THE SODA EGO SOMEHOW

So wellcheer's story is like, this employee getting drugged and taken aboard a ship, and eventually coming to enjoy his work there, finding it better than working in the city. In general this reads to me as the escapist fantasy of the employees, wanting something that's more fulfilling, more satisfying, hoping for a change. While I think Hong Lu having it is somewhat self explanatory, I think we need to consider Ryoushuu as well, since both can provide context for one another. I will also bring up the fact that someone pointed out they could correlate to the types of work that give grape wellcheers, those being attachment(being kind and friendly) and repression(denying the abnormality in some way)- which I didn't quite agree with at first, but I think I understand better now that yes, it's likely. With that out of the way~! Let's talk about Hong Lu, since he's the one we understand the most about! These are not clean sections by the way. They're ramblings of a mad man.

"Tadaa~ Transformation complete! Hah, we've a boatload!" 

- Hong Lu Awakening

I think Hong Lu's is specifically meant to represent denial as his form of escapism. He denies anything that happens to him, and instead focuses on other things. We can note that Hong Lu seems to enjoy film in some way, and often mentions boredom and 'entertainment.' Not to mention Land of Illusion(I stare at the 5 gloom cost good fucking lord). Yah. Anyways, his magical girl transformation is an obvious reference to well, magical girl shows. Y'know, the kind of shows you watch and go 'man I'd love to be just like her" at least according to people. Understanding that, as well as pointing out that in both his Dimension Shredder and his Roseate Desire he seems a lot more overtaken by the abnormality than Yi Sang and Ishmael respectively in their awakenings(Yi Sang at least has both arms and Ishmael seems really not to be having a fun time), I think I can safely say that I think Hong Lu being on the boat is quite literally him fully accepting the fantasy of it. Have any of you method acted before? I have done it before, but not correctly, and I'm easily swayed by the emotions and thoughts of the characters I overtake, it's incredibly hard to maintain a divide between 'yourself' and 'your character' if you don't properly understand yourself- I mention this because it's quite literally what the Sinners do. I know this seems random to bring up but I hear me out here. I think it's clear that method acting wise, Hong Lu gets much more lost in his roles than the other sinners- I'd argue Canto IV especially shows this. Some of the others seem to also have trouble with Canto IV's play scene, but I believe the difference between that and their EGOs is how prolonged it is. Hard to explain, but yeah, Hong Lu quietly gets much more lost in his roles and it really does show in his EGOs- which is likely part of the escapism of it all. TL;DR I think his thing is denial, and as such, he represents the Repression half of the Wellcheers Grape Soda, and the reason he's on the boat is that he's *fully* invested in the EGO.

...Someone more into method acting should explain it better and see how it works within the context of EGO.

"Go on, open wide. Relax and cram this drink down your throats, heheh." 

- Ryoushuu Awakening

And that brings us to Ryoushuu, who I think represents the Attatchment side. And that might sound really weird at first. Why is the friendly one who seems to be more open with everyone Repression and the one who quite literally would attack other people and seems much more distant from everyone else despite it being several months now be Attachment? I'll explain more in Hong Lu's corrosion section. Anyways Ryoushuu! I think, in a way, her EGO, and the fact it's Zayin, is rather important- I'm still not quite sure on that aspect outside of 'it is really notable Gregor and Ryoushuu have Zayin EGOs.' I think her form of escapism is much more external than Hong Lu's- of course there's her tendency to smoke, but there's also her tendency to get obsessed with her art- and I think the fact that art is often heavily affected by the emotions of the creator is important. Art's a form of venting in a sense, but the way Ryoushuu does art she forces other people to deal with her problems. It's hard to explain gosh. Basically, she's very much ignoring her problems by creating art- she's not solving the root problem, she's not actually understanding why she's feeling that way, she just doesn't deal with it. THIS IS SHORTER THAN HONG LU'S SECTION BUT IN MY DEFENSE-

"The seagulls... They keep crying and screaming away...!" 

- Hong Lu Corrosion

So yeah these two. Ryoushuu's based on a man who committed suicide after the death of his daughter(who we know is dead in Limbus too, Fourth Match Flame and Red Eyes very heavily imply that, not to mention how Ryoushuu reacts to Outis during Hell's Chicken) and very much so has self-destructive behavior(said staring directly at Indiscriminate Art, which passive wise is exactly the same as Self-Neglect, and her smoking habits), while Hong Lu seems to very much have a persona of being cheerful and oblivious to the point of where it's very hard to tell if he's being genuine or not(The one potato joke in Hell's Chicken)- a persona that has not cracked yet in story, even when Faust attempted to break it with a sledgehammer(Once again, Hell's Chicken). I mention this because his persona has cracked in his EGOs- and this is one of them. I argue that both of their egos will be them no longer able to confide in their coping mechanisms of escapism, and their reactions to that. Hong Lu's EGO specifically shows him with the net stuck around him and in his mouth, and with him seeming almost panicked and lost. It's very particular he seems focused on the 'seagulls' which can seem a bit random, but I believe this is due to the 'seagulls' representing his last thread of escapism- his world, literally and in his denial, is falling apart. I'd argue that Ryoushuu's will be somewhat similar, also representing her thread of escapism falling apart- likely to do with either Yuzuki’s death or her completion of the ‘Hellscreen,’ and her being unable to deal with it.

I think they'll both be either Lust or Gluttony EGOs put a cute little thumbsup here

Of course I can be like, completely wrong. Anyways it's like 3 in the morning stream heart's claws by vane(flashing colors warning): 

https://youtu.be/2M2BHjVQPH4

i wanted to post the sodas but that’d take too long

[sun-and-moon-mushroom]

Day 28: “No… Not Like This”

AO3 link

(Based on this idea)

When Shen Qingqiu had realised that there was no way to avoid pushing Luo Binghe into the Abyss, no way to make sure his disciple didn’t blacken into the vengeful protagonist he’d once read about, he may have panicked a little. A solid week later, after locking himself in the hidden section of the Qing Jing library and looking through every book and scroll he could find, he had a potential solution — not something that could keep Luo Binghe at his side, but one that could save him from the terrible fate of the original Shen Qingqiu.

It was a simple enough curse, something he could vaguely remember being used against one of Binghe’s wives in Proud Immortal Demon Way — it bound the lives of two individuals together, so that the harm done to one would be shared with the other, but only in one way. The wife, #578 if he remembered correctly, had her life bound to Luo Binghe’s by an enemy of her family, who hoped that the injuries done to the demonic emperor during his regular adventures, the ones that his heavenly demon blood would heal him from, would be shared with the poor wife character, killing her off. Then, her family would naturally blame Luo Binghe and rebel against him, leading to their own destruction! A surprisingly decent plan, cor Airplane-Shooting-Towards-The-Sky at least, but it had obviously failed when Luo Binghe had broken the curse through dual cultivation with the afflicted maiden.

Of course, if it was just dual cultivation that was needed to break the curse, Shen Qingqiu would have never even considered using it, since Binghe would obviously meet many of his future wives before he returned to take his revenge on Shen Qingqiu. No, it specifically had to be dual cultivation with the person the curse bound your life to, and he was sure that Luo Binghe would never accept doing such a thing with his old master, especially if it required him to take the position of —

Anyway! Shen Qingqiu figured the best time to place the curse was just before they left for the Immortal Alliance Conference. He wasn’t likely to get injured, and after the demons attacked, Luo Binghe would probably dismiss any injuries as from a monster attack he didn’t fully notice. It was simple enough to do, especially since Luo Binghe slept in the side room of his house — all he needed as a little bit of blood and a little bit of time to complete it.

Things seemed to be going well — the Conference was attacked on schedule, although things had diverged a little from canon — really, Shen Qingqiu was a bit glad that his Binghe didn’t have his first time with a girl who was actively dying, that was really more coercion than consent. Things only went wrong, when instead of the monster that was meant to appear to break Binghe’s seal, Mobei-jun himself appeared from the Abyss. Shen Qingqiu fought him, ordering Luo Binghe to stand down — but then Without-A-Cure flared up, and the moment he faltered, he felt his body be pierced by spears of ice, and heard a cry of pain from behind him.

He turned his head to see Luo Binghe, his sword in hand, and with blood staining his pure white robes, looking at Shen Qingqiu with an expression of horror on his face. It wasn’t meant to happen so soon, not like this. Shen Qingqiu could barely process the image before he was thrown — right into a tree — as Mobei-jun turned his attention to the half-demon disciple. He watched as Luo Binghe had his demonic powers unsealed and Mobei-jun left, before staggering to his feet, Xiu Ya still in his hand.

When Luo Binghe looked up at him, fear and panic in his eyes, he steeled himself for the role he had to play.

“How long have you been studying demonic cultivation?”

Binghe tried to explain, but Shen Qingqiu couldn’t let him. If he’d already gone this far, even cursing the protagonist, shouldn’t he do the role of the villain justice?

“Did you really think I didn’t know you were a demon? Those wounds you have — they’re from a curse I placed on you, to make sure a beast like you wouldn’t betray the Peak. But now? Now there’s no other option but getting rid of you — Cang Qiong will be blamed for this mess, along with you.”

His heart broke as he spoke those words, but it was necessary — something he had decided beforehand. The break between them, the severing of their master and disciple bond, it had to be a clean cut. He may have treated Luo Binghe well, but turning on him out of nowhere would only make him suffer more. It was better this way, for him to believe that Shen Qingqiu had always hated him for the simple matter of his heritage.

Xiu Ya in hand, he pushed Luo Binghe closer and closer to the edge of the Abyss. Any surge of hesitation in his heart was ruthlessly squashed by the ticking timer in the corner of his vision, almost down to the last few seconds. He thrust the blade forwards, expecting Binghe to dodge, only for him to take the blade right into his chest. Shen Qingqiu felt his eyes burn as Luo Binghe slid off the end of his blade, falling backwards into the gaping maw behind him. When… when did it start raining?

[pencileraser1]

i think dead poets in nyc has permanently changed my perception of both todd and neil, anytime i think of them post canon i always picture them as more ethan hawke and rsl like than they are in canon.

if i remember correctly that was kind of the point, there was something about how they both had auditioned for opposite roles and peter weir decided to switch them so that by the end of the play they have swapped places in the story. it’s interesting to me how that plays out, particularly since I do think in a way they are both more themselves at the end of their character arcs than any other point. for todd it’s kind of obvious, as someone with social anxiety, although it seriously affects how i am around people, i mostly don’t really consider it to be my actual personality or what i’m really like even if it has a significant constant effect on my life. by the end of the movie todd has overcome some of that anxiety and is more comfortable existing as himself at least around the poets (see the later cave scenes and when they’re getting ready for the play) and additionally is able to stand up to nolan at the end of the play completely by himself (once he stood up it’s not surprising that half the class followed but still it was him that stood up first and he had no way of knowing what would happen).

neil to me is a bit more complicated but the way i’ve always interpreted his character arc (which is a pretty common interpretation i think) is that he always had some underlying mental health issues that he was able to hide, which was even easier since most of the movie takes place during probably the happiest period of his life. it’s interesting to me that in earlier versions he is more obviously depressed, and although i don’t consider them canon at all, i do think the intention kind of carried over, he’s still depressed but he’s hiding it instead of letting people see him in that way. although this anecdote was about todd, i think the interview with ethan hawke and rsl about the original desk scene kind of encapsulates the whole thing, i think it was ethan that said the reason the original scene didn’t work was because todd would never be that self deprecating in front of neil. i think it’s exactly the same for neil. (on a side note; the original scene i think still exists, like the whole $5.98 thing, just todd never externalizes any of those thoughts. there are multiple examples of this sort of thing comparing older versions of the script to newer ones, and i personally think they may exist in the same way, like an older version of the scene after the first confrontation with neil’s dad where neil is visibly angry, in the final version he hides it but i think he would be feeling similar emotions as could be seen in that version) to an extent i do think some of his personality is fabricated both more obviously for his father (see im trapped scene) and also in general around his peers, even if it is just pretending he’s more okay than he is although i kind of think it might go further than that . we only briefly see him pre-keating/the society/acting so it’s a bit hard to gauge what he was like before. the dropping the annual scene is the first and biggest sign something was off until the i’m trapped scene and i think it says a lot about how he deals with his issues as well as how he attempts to hide them (telling charlie and knox that they wouldn’t stand up to their parents either- im not entirely sure how true this is at least for knox but they both go along with it). since it’s an isolated incident it’s kind of easy to brush off if you don’t know where the movie is going to go, which is probably also true for his friends. after that one scene he never outwardly shows that anything is wrong other than briefly while talking to todd and in one filmed cut scene which i think was cut for a reason. to an extent even keating doesn’t know how bad it had gotten for neil; i don’t think if he knew neil was at risk of suicide he would’ve given the advice he did. the only time in the movie he actually seriously confides in someone is with keating briefly, and the next time they talk he goes back to pretending things are fine. his suicide attempt is him attempting to take control over his life in the only way he knows to do at that point. although it’s possible the only thing he hid from his peers was his mental illness, the possibility that he is masking to an even more extreme degree has always been interesting to me. for his whole life he has had to pretend to be someone else for his father, it makes sense that he’d feel the need to do the same for his friends. i don’t think he really fully learns that he can drop that mask around his friends, i think it just becomes too exhausting to hold up any longer.

i don’t thing neil would be the same post canon (if he lives). he ultimately fails at being the “dutiful son,” which even during the final argument with his father this is still something he is trying to sustain even if subconsciously, and that is part of the reason he can’t stand up to his father. i don’t think after the attempt that he’d continue to try to fulfill that role, which in turn i think could cause him to drop other aspects of his mask, esp. since everyone has already seen him at his worst. also i could see how after attempting suicide it might feel like none of this matters as much as he thought before. (to be clear i’m not trying to say his depression or his attempt is who he is, the depresson has a heavy impact on him which he hides from everyone else, up until his attempt, although i can see how comparing him as an inverse to todd whose social anxiety prevents him from doing what he wants and other people knowing who he is could come off that way.) we know todd has social anxiety and that isn’t Who he is even though it significantly impacts him and his life, and we get a better idea of who he is when his anxiety is lessened, at the same time neil is hiding the effects of his depression as well as other parts of himself and acts in a way that is most honest to who he is during the play, and to how much he is struggling in his last scene

this might be a big pile of nonsense sorry i just have too many thoughts about neil

[lordbhreanna]

SHIP HEADCANONS - Garrus/Shepard

Thanks for the tag @naldoreth 🌺

Gives nose/forehead kisses: Garrus (he likes to do the forehead touch, which in my headcanon is a common way for turians to display affection, since they don't really do the kiss thing).

Gets jealous the most: Well, we have seen Shepard getting a liiiittle jelaous of the turian lady (though that could be part of the roleplay). I don't think any of them is particularly jelaous, beyond some silly stuff like that.

Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive: Garrus.

Takes care of on sick days: They would both take care of each other. I have this headcanon that Shepard would check on him every free moment she got in ME2 when Garrus' injury was still recent.

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day: We know turians are not very fond of water, but he's curious enough (he wants to retire somewhere tropical, after all) so when they're on the beach and he hesitates, Shepard would push him.

Gives unprompted massages: Garrus. Shepard needs them, and according to Vetra in MEA, massassing a turian requires powered tools 😆 Not much room for unprompted ones.

Drives/rides shotgun: Much to everyone's (and Garrus especially) chagrin, Shepard usually drives. In her defense, she's better with skycars than military vehicles.

Brings the other lunch at work: Shepard would bring him food to the main battery when he was overworking himself, and he would take her dinner to her quarters 💕

Has the better parental relationship: I think Castis isn't as bad as it looks, and the good thing is that, despite their differences, he and Garrus are able to see common ground. However, if we count Anderson, Shepard wins. You can't beat Anderson, sorry Castis!

Tries to start role-playing in bed: Shepard, all the way. The whole Citadel date seemed like her idea and I love that, actually.

Embarrassingly drunk dancer: It's tempting to say Shepard, but she's already a terrible dancer, so I like imagining that after a certain amount of alcohol, Garrus would fit the bill. I mean, he's already a bit silly when dancing in full armor.

Still cries watching Titanic: It would be funny if Shepard showed Garrus the movie, and he was the one ending up more teary eyed. He likes Fleet and Flotilla if I remember correctly, so it'd suit him. He's such a soft boy 💕

Firmly believes in couples costumes: Similarly to the roleplay, I think Shepard would be the one to come up with this.

Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas: They would both do (weapon mods are expensive!)

Makes the other eat breakfast: Garrus to Shepard. And sleep as well.

Remembers anniversaries: They both do, but I think Shepard would have them more in mind. Garrus has a family of his own, but Shepard doesn't - and she has found one in him and the Normandy crew, so she's extra careful with those details.

Brings up having kids: Garrus, canonically.

(I love that so many of these can be answered thanks to the actual canon material. Shakarian will always be the ships of dreams ✨)

Tagging @ithilien-wolf @visualheresy @fiannans and whoever wants to do it!

[persephoneflowerpetals]

What exactly is the job that the children of hades have?

Does Thanatos exist in your universe? Because I think Zagreus would be a great soul collector.

Macaria, I am sure that Zeus would give her the Elysian fields once she was named goddess of blessed death and Hades would give her the Asphodel fields.

Melione, however I can't find a suitable job for her, I know she is the goddess of ghosts, but she could also be the goddess of funerary rites. A friend once told me that she could basically be the organizer and make sure that the offerings and prayers to the other gods are done correctly.

However, if this were the case, I feel that, like her father, they would be overloaded with work, something Hades surely doesn't want for his children.

So, for Zagreus, his role is Prince of the Underwolrd. He’s pretty much Hades’ second in command. He still has authority and whatnot, but for really important things he has to check in with his father. But yeah, he basically does all the stuff Hades does on a daily basis if he hasn’t already gotten to it lol. Sometimes Zagreus will just take over when Hades decides he wants to have a little vacation day or something lol, but that’s after Zagreus has been prince for a while lol. He trusts his son, but if he’s not super experienced in ruling the underworld by himself then he’s not gonna let him rule the whole place alone. But yeah, Hades pretty much teaches Zagreus everything he knows about ruling the place lol. You know that one scene in the Drama Festival episode where Hades is showing Icarus how he lives his life and how he does things to help him get into character of playing Hades in the school drama festival? Yeah, that’s pretty much how Hades teaches Zagreus how to rule the underworld.

Hades: Now, you don’t fry the minions, okay? You scorch them. See? *uses his fire powers to burn Pain and Panic* You’re taking notes on this, right?

Zagreus: *holding a quill and a piece of paper, rolls his eyes* Yes, dad.

Oh and no, I don’t think Thanatos exists in my universe. My au is based mainly off of the movie with little things from the series thrown in there that goes along with the canon of the movie and since Thanatos wasn’t really mentioned or shown in the movie or series, I just didn’t put him in there. But hey, you never know! I may add him in there one day lol! But for now though, Thanatos isn’t in my au lol.

For Melinoe, she’s goddess of ghosts and propitiation, so she takes care of the mortals that are “stuck in limbo” so to speak, like they’re not alive, but for some reason they never made it to the underworld, so their sprits are stuck on earth. Melinoe watches and rules over those souls. She also makes sure that mortals respect the dead by giving proper funerals and (in some cases) leaving offerings or flowers and stuff like that. She also has the power to bring souls from the underworld onto the earth. I mean, most gods can do that (because Hercules did it in the movie with Meg’s soul after he became a god), but Melinoe can literally do like a whole spooky thing where she can go the the grave of the person that died and raise their soul from the dead. She thinks it’s really cool and she loves the scare people by doing that lol. Honestly, she just uses her role for fun lmao. She loves to pull pranks on unsuspecting mortals that deserve it, like if someone ended up killing someone else, Melinoe will take that soul and be like “Hey, you wanna get some revenge on the dude that killed you? Let’s go scare the crap out of him and haunt the heck out of him!” Lmao

Oh, also Hades will constantly try to get Melinoe to bring the souls on earth to the underworld, but she likes the company up there when she’s on earth and it’s part of her job to watch over them until they can get to the underworld (the souls that get stuck on earth are usually ones that weren’t ready to die and had issues and stuff on earth to deal with) so she just makes up excuses like

Melinoe: They’re not ready yet, dad. They still have unfinished business.

Hades: Mel, honey, you know I love you, but with all do respect…they’re DEAD! They don’t have anymore business! They should’ve handled all that stuff before they died!

Melinoe: Dad, they had a deadly illness. You didn’t really give them time to hash things out up there.

Hades: Hey, it’s not my fault those mortals don’t know how to cover their mouths when they cough.

And for Macaria, she’s goddess of blessed death, so the idea I had for her was that she was basically gonna be the caretaker or sorta the ruler of Asphodel Meadows. She makes sure all the souls are happy with their afterlife and watches over them to make sure everyone who is supposed to be there is in there.

I was also thinking about her also being the caretaker/ruler of the Elysian Fields, but I’m still deciding lol. Because I know in the series Hades was never allowed to enter the Elysian Fields (even though it’s a part of his domain) because it’s very exclusive and it’s supposed to be a final resting place and paradise for the souls of heroes. I don’t think Zeus wanted Hades “ruining” the place by doing things to it (i.e. building his own little “summer home” there) or messing with the souls there, so that’s why Hades was restricted from entering.

However, I like the idea of Macaria being a caretaker/ruler of the Elysian Fields just because it goes along with the whole “goddess of blessed death” thing and I think Hades would be so proud of his youngest baby for getting full access to the Elysian Fields, something he was never able to do even as god of the underworld. Also, I just find it so funny to imagine Hades constantly pestering his daughter to let him enter the Elysian Fields lmao.

Hades: Mac, sweetie, I’m your father! It’ll be fine! I’ll just be in and out! Zeus won’t even know I’ve been in there!

Macaria: Daddy, you know the rules. I can’t let you in. I’m sorry. I really would let you in, but I just don’t want to get in trouble with Uncle Zeus.

Hades: *sighs and smiles then chuckles* You really are just like your mother, aren’t you? *kisses her forehead* But trust me, I’d totally take the hit for you from Uncle Zeus if you let me in.

Macaria: Daddy…

Hades: Alright, alright. Sorry. I’ll drop the subject.

But yeah, like, at the same time, I just feel like Hades having a kid who’s allowed to enter the Elysian Fields would be too easy of a way for him to get in there. Like, Elysian Fields is supposed to be really exclusive and we all know Zeus doesn’t really trust Hades all that much (especially after the whole Olympus takeover thing), so would he really trust his child with Elysian Fields? Even if she’s the sweetest and most well behaved of his kids and takes the most after her mother lol? Idk, like I said, I really do love the idea, so I’m still considering it lol

So yeah, that’s all the roles the kids have and their jobs when they grow up lol! Oh and yeah, Hades DEFINITELY doesn’t want his kids to be overwhelmed or stressed with their roles, so if they ever need help doing things he will honestly drop everything to help them finish what they need to get done (and same goes for Persephone as well, she will do anything to help her kids with their roles too). Like, even if he still has stuff to do, he’ll help his kids. Zagreus needs help counting souls? He’s got it. Macaria needs help tending to the animal souls in Asphodel Meadows? Don’t worry, he’ll be there. Melinoe can’t find a missing soul on earth? Dad’s on the way lol.

[red-n-stuff]

The more darlin backstory we receive the more and more I want to sit down and write a whole timeline of events for my version of them just because I need to be able to correctly reflect their experiences in the blurbs I write….

Also: (unpopular opinion, so if you disagree that’s cool, don’t worry I’m not comin for you, this is just my darlin in my head)

I tend to see a lot of content that has David being sort of an older sibling to Darlin, or that their role in the pack is often more inflated then what’s canon (which again, cool for y’all if that’s how y’all wanna play it) but there’s so much room for angst and growth and raw emotions by exploring the avenue that Darlin isn’t really that same teenager that they all managed to make friends with- and that now after everything that happened they’re much more jaded.

They’re trying again, and they want to be a part of the pack again, and right now David, Asher, and Milo are all trying to find their footing with where they stand with Darlin. Too much has happened for all of them for them to just resume that easy teenage experience- but I think that the four of them rebuilding a bond that extends beyond just being in a pack, that stems beyond blood (real or metaphorical), is a stronger bond than the idea of them being there out of obligation.

Darlin is choosing the pack. Not because they have a duty to their past self- not out of guilt for some connection to Gabe, not because they feel like they owe it to anybody, but because these people are people that have proven they’re reliable, safe, and willing to allow darlin the space to breathe that they need. Consistently, David has made it a point to not try to take up the role of an overbearing older brother because Darlin does not need more family. Darlin needs friends. And at the end of the day, they need a circle of support they know they could never let down rather than more people they have to try to meet expectations for.

[nancydrewwouldnever]

It's the most head-scratching thing. He thinks the idea was solid and actually something viewers wanted (no, they didn't) // I think ghosted the concept could’ve actually been well received by viewers and critics alike if it has been done correctly. Like if it was Daniel Radcliffe or Justin Long in the role of Cole, a guy that can play comedy well while also looks like he can’t fight for shit. Shoehorning himself into the project was ultimately Chris’ and the project’s down fall because people still see him and associate him with captain america (which he has done nothing to help bc he still fucking talks about cap in interviews) and it broke the allusion that he could ever possibly be a damsel in distress.

Chris is an action movie actor at this point. He did nothing to expand his repertoire during marvel or even before it. I think he could’ve done well in other roles but he pigeonholed himself and that’s his fault (and his teams) alone. Chris could take some pointers from Daniel on how to move away from the title role they’re so well known for tbh 🤷‍♀️

I adore the way Daniel Radcliffe has managed his career post Harry Potter. He's really played with expectations, and takes such interesting and off the wall projects. I also enjoy that he leaned into comedy, because he has a real adeptness with it.

[waspredteeth]

using this site as a notes board to shop around my Bette Kane-Battle for the Cowl AU which I will now be lovingly regarding as the “Flamebird&Not-Robin in: the dangers of dead fathers, two (2) different spy organizations run by our evil-except-not-really-mothers, and somehow everything always is either a Wayne or a Kanes fault.”

Starting off this au with a general list of the characters in it and their roles as of Battle for the Cowl:

(((Edit: I changed the format to make this easier to read)))

Bette Kane - Flamebird

I’m throwing around the idea of her being a forensic scientist/or a pro-athlete

I hc her as being the same age as Dick i.e around 26

she’s back in Gotham bc Bruce died, stays in Gotham bc she sees the absolute mess it’s in & decides to help

even if it’s dubious if anyone really wants/needs her there

still an established LA hero with a public reputation so she’s not totally unknown to Gotham

finds Damian basically homeless in Gotham/breaking into places to stay and offers to take him in

he only accepts bc he knows she’s a Kane/related to his father

correctly regards Damian as an abused child / but doesn’t have the prior extensive knowledge or experience with the League to cloud her judgement on Talia or Damian (they’re equally both victims in her eyes)

while she is leagues more adjusted emotionally than the other Bats (she almost never interacts with Bruce outside of her childhood) - she’s still a lil traumatized and unhealthily copes regarding her parental situation and Kathy Kane

also has a little bit of trauma-related amnesia with a certain section of her childhood (that will come into play)

She does remember being Batgirl vaguely, very vaguely

Damian al Ghul-Wayne - not Robin in this au

at least not yet

he goes out on his own without a definite vigilante identity until later developments

came to Gotham to see Bruce after leaving Talia

Bruce is “dead” so Damian decides to wander Gotham on his own before Bette discovers him

tentatively stays with Bette bc they are related and he needs shelter

is secretly still insecure about Bruce (bc of how they last interacted) ((Batman#655-657)) /and whether or not Dick would have accepted him, as they haven't met before this au (Resurrection of Ras al Ghul is heavily altered)

tolerates Bette, Tom, and Rory’s friendly affection but will not hesitate to leave in the early months

is struggling with his place in the world bc Bruce is gone, Dick doesn’t know who he is, and Tim still hates him. So he’s not on the best terms with the main Bats.

Tom Bronson - Wildcat (the third)

If you don’t know who he is (I think only JSA fans know if his existence), he’s the third-ish Wildcat of the 2007 Justice Society, the estranged son of Ted Grant, following the long-ago death of Yolanda Montez and way-longer ago death of Jake Grant.

And yes, he is the one that transforms into an anthropomorphic black jaguar (he got it from his mom)

Ted will make an appearance and somehow I WILL bring Yolanda back from the dead/maybe even Jake too

Tom goes to Gotham to help his dad with the city shenanigans of BfTC

jury’s still out on whether I’m making him a love interest for Bette (my brain will make crack ships of the most random characters, don’t mind it)

decides to stay in Gotham even after his dad leaves bc the Bats really are stretched thin (in his opinion) (he’s used to the large size and scope of the JSA)

becomes a brother figure for Damian

accepts him as a annoying little brother in the sense of someone taking care of a stray kitten that bites your hand

lacks literally all experience with anything Batman related before going to Gotham / so he has Opinions about the family

is constantly anxious about Gotham (he is from Brooklyn) (someone pls tell him how this dysfunctional group of people manages to do anything at any point in time in This Fucking City)

a non-Bat POV into the insanity of Bat-events happening

what’s the League of Assassins? or Leviathan? Or Spyral? Or a Red Hood? Fuck if he knows

In my mind, Grant Emerson never died (he is happy and thriving OK) (fuck u Blackest Night) (he will make an appearance) (alongside Maxine)

Rory Regan - Ragman

our favorite underrated Jewish hero

originally from Gotham, I’m surprised he isn’t used more

for those not in the know : Ragman is a magical/mythical Jewish hero consisting of a costume made of rags which contain the countless souls of sinners who will eventually gain redemption within the rags if they help the current Ragman

Rory can use their strength, minds, and skills to help him as Ragman

Ragman (the suit) was canonically created to protect the Jewish population of Europe around the 1500s after the Golem of Prague was also made

Bruce makes an appearance in his 90s series actually / and Rory makes a cameo in a couple issues of O’Neil Batman

I’m planning on making him a more homegrown hero who tends to the homeless/poor/criminals that the Bats don’t get to- the whole “Tatterdemalion of the Justice” thing

is here bc we need another non-Bat pov of Gotham (he’s way more familiar with Gotham than Tom)

and I also like Gotham being more diverse in terms of vigilantes

bonus mentor for both Bette and Damian

he likes Bette bc shes 1. Jewish 2. a lighter hero than the other Bats 3. is a little easier to communicate with

he knows Damian is struggling and tries to support him in any way he can (as Rory also has daily struggles about his own morality bc of the Ragman suit/entity)

has been in Ragman in Gotham for about as long as Bruce has been Batman / he has seen some shit

The Ragman suit canonically slows the aging of the user, so Rory is older than he looks

he only just now started working with Oracle bc he understands the need for a semi-formal organization of Gotham heroes (he does appear in BfTC: The Network)

Kathy Webb-Kane - Agent 0/Headmistress

The leader of Spyral

not a child of a n*zi/ Otto Netz does not exist in this AU

still the first Batwoman

not romantically involved with Bruce bc ew

formerly married to Nathan Kane - the oldest Kane sibling of the little dynasty (Martha’s older brother)

after he died, she inherited what fortune he had that wasn’t taken by the Kanes

formerly Bette’s legal guardian/adopted mom after her dad died when she was 9

yes there will be mommy issues/familial conflict bc Spyral is an antagonist

conflicted about Bette bc she does still care for her, but she has a mission that she was committed too long before Bette was even born

clearly remembers being Batwoman

Spyral is still a spy organization connected to St. Hadrian’s Finishing School

currently targeting Talia/Leviathan, Damian, and Jason

also begins targeting Bette after she starts investigating in search of Kathy

Talia - Head of Leviathan

okay so. Resurrection of Ras al Ghul happens, but not the same way. Talia tries to go against Dusan on her own with Damian after learning of the body snatching plot

Inevitably, Ras comes back. He manipulates Talia and Damian into staying for a little longer. Things do not work out, and Talia deliberately sends Damian to Gotham bc Bruce isn’t dead (yet).

Bruce dies, and Talia loses hope in trusting any of the Bats to help her and Damian (she and Dick never got along, her relationship with Jason is strained)

So she creates Leviathan as a way to combat her father

BUT it’s not the same organization at all. It’s more of a spy organization with the direct purpose of taking down Ras/implementing a better version of his ecological agenda without as much murder and bloodshed.

Leviathan also is technically against Batman bc obviously Talia has never aligned completely with Bruce either. But she doesn’t purposefully try to kill him or Damian.

She’s a very conflicted character here, and she’ll show up in person to see Damian and learn of his status. As a mom, not a villain.

She’ll have a bigger part later on as Leviathan comes into conflict with Spyral.

Wants to take Damian back but is terrified that she’s not a good mother, that’s she’ll only make her precious son worse, and that Ras will just take something else from her permanently again (familial trauma x2)

So she flip-flops between helping Damian and trying to stop him from being a vigilante out of fear for his safety - which Damian detests (mommy issues 2: electric boogaloo)

Leviathan becomes a target for Spyral after it starts gaining followers that aren’t former League traitors and gains a wider influence among the eco-conscious and those who genuinely want Ras al Ghul gone forever

Dick - Nightwing/Batman

basically the same as og Battle for the Cowl

he becomes Batman and struggles under the mantle

doesn’t take in Damian so Tim stays Robin and in Gotham longer

he doesn't meet Damian until after Bette starts taking care of the kid so they don't have the same connection as in canon

he slowly becomes endeared to Damian the more they interact as the plot goes forward

while he’s still dismissive of Bette at the beginning, he’s forced to trust her when it comes to Damian and Spyral

He comes very close to like seventy mental breakdowns over the whole story

Tim - Robin

stays Robin bc Damian doesn’t need the role when he gets to Gotham

so no, there isn’t any conflict regarding the mantle until way later, and by the time Damian becomes Robin - Tim is already Red Robin

Bc Tim is Robin, he stays in Gotham for a while after Dick becomes Batman

that doesn’t mean there isn’t any tension bc there’s still the whole “Bruce isn’t dead” thing

Unlike canon though, Tim has words and can communicate before he leaves so Dick actually knows that Tim has at least a barebones theory of what happened to Bruce (doesn’t mean that Dick fully completely believes him and he’s still grieving so he doesn’t want anything dangerous to happen to Tim)

(this also means that the zombie Batman thing doesn’t happen)

Tim still leaves on his League pilgrimage and becomes Red Robin out of necessity

He still pushes people away, and he still is an asshole to Stephanie

Ras is very clearly manipulating him out of his own goals to strengthen the League and act against Leviathan

When he comes back to Gotham, Tim fights with Damian over the issue of Talia and Leviathan (bc he sees it as another fully evil organization, slight bias put into him by Ras)

Stephanie - Batgirl

the same as the comics

technically more on Barbara’s side than Dicks after BfTC

still a sister figure for Damian

will eventually meet with Bette bc it’s a crime that they never know each other in canon

is carving out her own legacy and path as a hero and Batgirl

still dealing with insecurity over Bruce

Cassandra - not Batgirl or Black Bat

will eventually become Batman

doesn’t show up until after the initial Battle for the Cowl

becomes Batman entirely on her own (for a bit there’s like three Batmen running around)

exclusively works with Oracle and Steph, comes to work together with Dick

doesn’t interact as much with Bette or Damian until they cross paths investigating Leviathan

Barbara - Oracle

still the same

does not interact as much with Dick&Tim bc she’s still running the Birds of Prey on top of training Steph

will interact with Kathy and Bette eventually bc I need the Batgirl interactions

Jason - Red Hood

is Batman briefly during BfTC

still takes in Scarlet as a pseudo-child

he won’t play a big part in the Bette/Damian part of the story

will eventually become a target for Spyral bc Red Hood is a crime boss with some wide connections

Bruce - dead (lol)

still time traveling and everything

tim will still investigate

the omega sanction/Barbatos hullaboo still happens