#and 2) I had some issues that needed to be resolved before I could start doing attacks properly and im finally doing those again ^^

[kelocitta]

Gris is officially up on Artfight for the lizard likers (Or just people who want to draw an anthro)

[the-tarot-witch22]

What's coming for you in 2025? - Pick a Pile

Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3

My Paid Readings | My insta | My year goal post

Liked my blog or readings? Tip me!

Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!

Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!

How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!

I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!

Pile 1:

(The cards I got for you - The emperor, The hanged man, 6 of pentacles, 5 of pentacles, and 6 of cups)

Okay so the very first thing I feel and heard for you guy is "Organization and structure", if you have been messy like emotionally or just not cleaning your room and just being lazy, I see you getting better and do things in a better way, I am also feeling you will be taking charge in your personal and professional life, if you are in school then i am seeing you being group leader or having better grades, and if you work then i see leading your team, or even correcting your manager like damn this person doesn't hold back, I am feeling some of you may even start your own business like plenty of you wanting to do that, or had doubts, so i am seeing this year could be very fruitful to you in so many ways, I am feeling many of you are just polite in this group, even though you guys might be snarky, BUT, this year i am seeing changing that, i am feeling you will communicated yourself a lot better, if you guys had some financial issues that will be resolving too, I am also feeling you might learn from a male figure in your life, make them your role model, and learn a lot from them. Or I am also feeling in your life you guys have someone dominating your household, like a man, sometimes you do get in fights but it's not bad, this is only for some of you. I am also seeing you being not lazy as you were before, going out of comfort zone, doing things, which you have to do, i keep hearing panda for you guys, some of you could definitely be resonating with that lol. I am also feeling this year you would be helping out a lot of people, and looking back on things you did wrong and will do better this year, also do help people when you can, like feeding animals or people who are in need, it will count as a good karma, some of you could have been injured in past? definitely felt that, but don't worry this year, i am also feeling good health for you, I am also feeling some of you could reunite with people from past, but only let them in if you feel like it, for some of you its a friend, and for some its an ex, just be careful <3 I am also feeling you will get lots of nostalgic feeling and if you have moved out, i am seeing you meeting your parents this year, like getting a feeling some of you might be in abroad, so you might meet or talk with your parents and friends a lot. Earth signs are very prominent here especially virgo and taurus sun/moon/rising, and scorpio sun/ moon / rising.

Oracle cards I pulled for you :

a new start is coming (new moon) : A new beginning a new start is on its way for you, you will be more hopeful, let go of the past, things you manifest will be fruitful, things will move, you will feel more alive if you felt stuck, and YES! whatever your question could be your doubts because trust me its a yes.

be assertive - Be confident in your decisions and yourself, i am hearing "life is too short" living by other people's rules, so make your own and just do what you gotta do.

Okay pile 1, that's all i got for you guys, happy new year my pookies, may all your wishes come true cheers <3

Pile 2 :

(The cards I got for you - 8 of wands, 2 of pentacles, 5 of pentacles, 6 of swords and the lovers)

Okay so the very first thing I heard and feel is that you will or might be taking a trip, I am feeling things will move fast for you, I am also seeing you guys getting the job you want, the internship, the college you want to go into, everything working out for you, the hard struggles that you have faced in your life are just vanishing but i am also seeing a small trip or just up and down from the college/school/work to your kind of travel, I am feeling you might meet someone this year could be at work or at school if not then, some sort of daily doing activity, but anyhow i am feeling there is so much in life that will be working out for you guys. Some of you would be developing new hobbies for yourself like going to gym or yoga or art classes. You might do find to juggle with them a bit difficult like there will be so many things and you would be like we want to try it, try that etc. But all in a good way. I am also feeling that there might be a sort of loss you faced in your life in 2024 or 2023, i am seeing you will be moving away from it, and healing that part of yours, I am also feeling when you do and that's when you will meet someone in your life, and if you don't meet someone then your energy will definitely be calling your partner's energy. But for many of you I am sensing there is a beautiful reunion ahead. Plus there will be decision coming ahead, so go with your gut and choose what you have to. Self love is also a care here, where you focus on yourself. Gemini , cancer, capricorn sun/ moon/ rising are quite prominent here.

Oracles Cards I pulled for you -

Luck is on your side (new moon in Sagittarius) - Write down your wishes your gratitude in the journal, don't be judgy if sometimes you are, a thing that will help you in every way, which you wanted so much it will come to you, there might also be a trip coming.

No need to worry : Things will get better for you so leave the rest to universe and be present in the moment, I am sensing some of you are over worrier so do take it easy, because universe got your back.

Ask for help from others - If you bottle things up, then try to ask for help from others don't hesitate, and your loved ones love you, they love to listen to you talk don't get lost in your heads all the time, you got this.

Okay pile 2, that's all i got for you guys, happy new year my pookies, may all your wishes come true cheers <3

Pile 3 :

(The cards I got for you guys - 3 of wands, queen of wands, king of cups, the fool)

Okay so the very first thing i hear and feel for you guys is, manifest your dreams, just do it, don't doubt if it will be fruitful or not just do it, I am also feeling this new year will bring you a new sort of adventure, something you have never felt before, WHY AM I FEELING THE ADERALINE RUSH, SO I AM SENSING IT WILL BE SOMETHING UNIQUE AND AMAZING AND A DREAM COME TRUE! I am also feeling that some of you guys have fire sign prominent sun/moon/rising especially Sagittarius, I am feeling you guys will be going on a trip this year, which is abroad, you might also go to study in new country, it will be so sudden you will feel it's a no, but when you do it will be like, you made it, 2025 is a year of prosperity for you, and i am seeing lots of blue color, and blue skies, and I am seeing hope for you guys, new starts, adventures, I am also feeling you might adopt a dog or a animal this year, I am also feeling you will enter your divine feminine era this year, and being more confident in your body, I am also feeling the person you will attract will be head over heels for you, awwww, and I am seeing you stepping or taking risks, you might be a bit reckless but honestly seeing this will work out for you~

Oracles card I got for you -

conclusion are within reach (full moon eclipse) - Forgive yourself and others what they have hurt you, it will help you heal, the door once shut, dont go back to it, just know helping others will also be fruitful to you guys.

step out of your comfort zone (north node) - go out just do what you always want to do, say fuck it and do it don't doubt your blessing, you got this, leave the past in past, let go of people or things that doesn't serve you, just know whatever you choose you will be moving in right direction.

success! - I am seeing your professional life getting better and better and whatever door was not opened it will open now, and I am seeing you getting lots of opportunities.

romance - I am definitely seeing you meeting someone this year, if you alrwady have someone your relationship might move to next level.

compromise - The only thing I will say is just get out of your comfort zone.

Okay pile 3, that's all i got for you guys, happy new year my pookies, may all your wishes come true cheers <3

Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3

[bellestarot]

Pick a Pile

What's Next in Life?💐

♡ Take your time to choose

︵‿︵‿︵ʚĭɞ‿︵‿︵‿

Pile I

You're about to level up emotionally. I see you moving from getting hurt easily to someone who can handle emotions in a better way. Maybe it was hard for you in the past, but I see some major emotional glow-ups happening.

You're also going to get braver. Life's going to throw some challenges your way that'll help you grow.

Your adventurous side is coming out to play. You'll be at peace exploring and discovering more about yourself. I see you traveling and visiting new places, but you're doing it for yourself, not for anyone else.

You'll be surrounded by awesome people. True and genuine friendships are on their way to you in the next chapter of your life. If you had trouble with friends before, that’s about to change. Great people are coming, and the universe has your back.

You’ve been through a lot, but now you can finally trust in the situation and these new friends. I see so much happiness coming your way!

Pile II

I see success and happiness in something you’ve put a lot of work and effort into for a long time. This could be related to academics, work, or something personal. You’ve worked really hard, staying up late, feeling anxious and tired, but you kept pushing through. There were many moments when you thought about giving up, but you didn’t. Now, I see a lot of abundance coming your way in the next chapters of your life.

People will be congratulating you and happy for you because you achieved what you wanted.

I also see some family issues. This won't apply to everyone who chose Pile 2, but some of you might relate to what I’m saying. Maybe some of you have issues with your mom or a strong female figure in the family.

There might be problems related to money or how money is used in the family, causing feelings of sadness. These are more emotional issues rather than health-related ones.

I see some disappointment with the family in certain areas. However, any conflict you might have with a female figure in the family will get resolved. Having this kind of relationship can hurt a lot, but I see it ending and getting better. So, for some of you, this might be a message of support and positivity regarding a connection that's not going well right now, and I can say it will definitely improve in the next chapters.

Pile III

I see you getting savvier about other people. In the past, you might have been too nice, always wanting to help others, but when you needed help, no one was there for you. I see you starting to notice this around you and saying, "No, I don’t want that for myself." You’re becoming smarter about what you share with others and what you post online.

You’ll start realizing that everything is energy and that sometimes people don’t have good vibes or thoughts for you. This will lead you to protect your energy more.

You’re going to become very spiritual. (You’re already spiritual since you’re reading tarot), but I see you diving even deeper. You’ll get more interested in this world, studying more, listening to others, and connecting more with nature.

This will bring you closer to your truth and who you are, and I see that’s what you’re looking for—getting to know yourself better, discovering more about you, praying, and protecting yourself. I see you becoming a very spiritual person in the next chapters of your life.

You used to listen more than you spoke, but now I see you speaking up, sharing your opinions. There might have been some hesitation, wondering if people will like what you say or if it makes sense. But I see you finding the courage to express yourself and your thoughts. You’re super smart and interested in things that others might not be paying attention to.

I see you getting into these topics and being able to talk about them in an engaging and well-expressed way.

[potatoplace]

this is me trying

ACOTAR x Archeron!Reader

The Afterthought: Chapter 3 | series masterlist

part 2 | part 4 | ACOTAR x reader masterlist

Story Summary: The day after your birthday is spent shopping for Solstice presents and a surprisingly pleasant conversation with one of your sisters. Winter Solstice proves to be a pleasant affair for you this year.

Warnings: self worth issues, discovering bisexuality, honestly there's not much here, it's a fairly fluffy chapter, lemme know if I missed something

Words: ~8.2k

Author's Note: here it is! It's only like... half of what I wanted to cover in this chapter, but I'm happy with what I've written. I hope you all like it! It's a bit nicer of a chapter, mainly fluff-ish with very little angst imo. (It's a lot nicer than I'd planned to be... lol) enjoooyyyy 🫶

18+ only pls

🤍🤍💝🤍🤍

You woke when the sky was still dark, the house beneath you quiet. Your body was still aching, the sharp pains having woken you from your dream of the cabin and your father.

Forcing yourself from the tub, you pulled your bedding back to its rightful place and drew a bath. The steaming hot water was the perfect remedy along with your fingers rubbing gentle circles over your lower abdomen.

The sky was just beginning to lighten when you dragged yourself from the bath and dressed, resolving to do you skincare when you returned from your mission.

Shopping for Feyre's birthday and Solstice was your one true goal for the day, and then you could hibernate for the two days before Solstice.

Your eyes roved over the stack of presents on your desk, catching on something you hadn't expected.

A plate with a piece of white chocolate raspberrry cake, a single candle sticking out of the slice. Along with it was a matchbook and a note. You tried to read it, but only got as far as deciphering who it was from- Feyre, from the signature at the bottom. Most likely an apology of some sort, but you could wait to have someone read it for you.

You turned your eyes to the cookbooks your sisters had gifted you. A sigh escaped your lips, and you walked over to look at them once more. The dessert book Elain had gifted you would be helpful for your gifting ideas- you wanted to give each couple, Mor and Azriel a box full of their favorite cookies and sweets.

Personal gifts would only be for Feyre, Mor and Azriel, seeing as it was Feyre's birthday, and Mor and Azriel had picked out more personal gifts for your own birthday. And of course Nuala and Cerridwen, you had always appreciated their willingness to share some of the cooking duties with you.

Mind settling back on the cookbook that Elain had given you, you flipped through it, attempting to identify everyone's favorites by the drawings accompanying the recipes.

Your head was starting to hurt.

A shake of your head and you closed the book, opting instead to tug on your coat and a hat, grabbing the cookbook before leaving your room, shutting the door behind you quietly.

Before you set out into the wintery city, you stopped by Nuala and Cerridwen's room, a soft knock on their door enough to have Nuala opening it.

"Could I come in?" You asked softly, trying to avoid waking those sleeping down the hall.

"Of course, Y/N," Nuala said with a smile, opening the door wider to let you slip inside, eyes catching sight of the book in your hands. "Did you need help reading a recipe?"

"Not quite, well... Yes, but I would also really appreciate if the two of you could help me find the recipes I need for Solstice presents, if you wouldn't mind?"

"Oh, I'd love to!" Cerridwen said once she had emerged from the bathroom, a towel still wrapped in her hair to dry. "Oo, a book of Solar Court desserts! I haven't seen this one before," the wraith said excitedly once she looked over the cover of the book. "Did you have anything particular in mind?"

"I was hoping we could find recipes for everyone's favorites, I'd like for all of them to have something they like. And maybe sugar cookies too, that could be decorated for Solstice."

"Ah, a challenge," Nuala smirked, a glimmer in her eyes. "Did you happen to want a little *help* making all of this?" She asked hopefully.

"If the two of you wouldn't mind, that would be lovely. But don't feel like you have to, please."

"Anything to help you out and spend a bit more time with you Y/N, it's been lonely cooking without you recently," Cerridwen reassured you, a gentle hand on your shoulder. "Now, let's get to finding those recipes, and Nuala and I will go shopping for any ingredients we'll need tomorrow if that's okay with you?"

You beamed at the twins, happy that they weren't upset at you disappearing on them for three weeks. "I would be so grateful to the two of you if you could help out. Thank you so much!"

The three of you sat down on Nuala's bed, flicking through the cookbook and marking each page that had a recipe you would need.

For Nesta, you would make thumbprint cookies with a blackberry jam- a dessert she had enjoyed since childhood, one that she had stared at hungrily for so long while your family had been impoverished. And for her mate, Cassian, you would bake lemon bars. He had absolutely devoured some at the Summer Solstice celebration this year, only leaving a few for everyone else.

Elain you would give chocolate dipped lacy cookies, her favorite treat to have with tea. Lucien would be receiving snickerdoodles, his favorite cookie and the first thing that Elain had baked for him.

Feyre absolutely adored thin lemon-ginger cookies, and with any possible morning sickness or nausea they could be a simple enough treat for her to have. For Rhys you would be making chocolate chip oatmeal cookies, made from his mother's recipe which Cerridwen had carefully tucked a copy of into the back of the cookbook for you to hold on to.

Mor would be getting lavender and pistachio macarons, snickerdoodles, and peanut butter fudge- the last you recipe you had stumbled across in the back of the book, and you knew it would be perfect for Azriel as well. For him you would be making the peanut butter fudge as well as a mint chocolate fudge, lemon bars, and peanut butter cookies. You hadn't seen him eat many sweets, but when he did they seemed to be either peanut butter, lemon, or mint, and you wanted to cover your bases.

And for everyone, and to give the three of you something to decorate, you would be making sugar cookies, hopefully in shapes resembling trees, ornaments, snowmen- really anything that would scream winter.

With the recipes picked out, the book left in the their care, and the twins' promise to gather the supplies, you set out for the Rainbow, in search of a present for Feyre.

The streets were quiet as you walked past rows of houses and apartments, the snow on the ground muffling everything.

It was easy to find the store you needed for the present you had in mind, the wood and paint scented air greeting you when you stepped inside. You glanced around, trying to familiarize yourself with the shop.

On your left was a wall of easels and canvases, the right taken up by every color of paint imaginable. You went to the left first after picking up a basket, setting nine small, square canvases inside before turning your eyes to look for rope and fasteners to connect all of them together. Your idea was for her to be able to paint one square per month of pregnancy, something to remember how she felt carrying her child.

"Did you need help finding something, love?" A female voice asked from the back of the shop, startling you out of your thoughts. You whipped around, eyes met with the sight of a beautiful fae, her skin shimmering in the light, constantly changing between the colors of the rainbow as she moved beneath it.

You managed to catch yourself from staring at her, your manners kicking in as you met her eyes- bright orange now, but you had a feeling that they would also change hue in different settings, the color shifting from a light sunrise to a burnt orange already.

"I was hoping to find some kind of rope to connect all of these, and something to fasten them to the actual canvas, if you have them," you replied shyly, your heart rate picking up as she came closer to you.

She was so pretty. You felt like you had months ago, staring at Cassian. But that was-

"I certainly do, love! They're on the other end of the shop, come with me," the fae said, her cool hand grasping yours and gently tugging you along with her. "What pattern were you wanting to put them in?"

"Uhm..." You tried to restart you brain, repeating the question in your head until you found its answer. "A three by three grid, I think."

She picked out several pieces of rope, as well as a small bag filled with pronged pieces of metal. "This should be enough of both, but if you need more you know where to find them now!" You nodded and followed her as she made her way to the counter in the back. "My name is Irina, by the way," she said as she bagged your items and wrote out a receipt.

"I'm Y/N." Just introducing yourself made your face flush, your mind replaying her name as you watched her fingers write.

"Oh, Feyre's sister?" Irina asked you, her eyes flicking up to meet yours once again. You nodded in confirmation, and she smiled. "I was wondering when I might happen across the youngest, I've already met your other sisters as well. Feyre's studio is just a few buildings down, and she comes in quite often for supplies. How has Velaris treated you so far?"

"Oh, uhm... It's a lovely city, truly. How... How much do I owe you?" You asked, trying to steer the conversation to a more pleasant topic.

"Eight gold marks, but I've already charged the account on file for you, Y/N."

You gave her a grateful smile. "Thank you, Irina. You have a beautiful shop here, I can see why Feyre comes in."

"Why thank you, Y/N! I'm very proud of it, and even more proud that our High Lady chooses my paints to use for her masterpieces," Irina sighed happily. "I hope the rest of your shopping goes well, love."

"I'm sure it will, thank you," you said with a smile before turning and slowly exiting her shop, your heart still racing from her presence.

You walked lazily through the Rainbow, eyes glossing over beautiful paintings and woven tapestries. You had nearly reached the end of it, almost in the Palace of Hoof and Leaf when you saw a stall that truly caught you eye.

Hairpins.

As children, the one purely material thing that you and Feyre had yearned for were hairpins. A woman in the village had made them by hand, delicate sticks with delicately crafted flowers attached to one end, sometimes with small gems dangling on short chains. They were far out of your price range while destitute, and you had almost entirely forgotten about your desire for one after your family had regained their fortune.

The ones from the village paled in comparison to these absolute works of art, lifelike flowers made of gems with matching petals dripping from them, secured only by small metal chains. Some had strings of pearls falling from them, others with a chain of sparkling diamonds.

You approached the stall, fingers hovering over the beautiful hairpins, but you were too afraid to touch them.

"Hello," the female behind the stall said, her silver skin shining, even shaded from the winter sun that had started shining brightly while you had been in Irina's shop. "Were you looking to buy a hairpin today?"

You smiled bashfully at her. "I might be, I'm not sure yet. They are absolutely beautiful, though."

The female beamed at you. "Thank you very much. They also double as a dagger, if needed," she said, pulling a thin sheath off of one of the hairpins, revealing a thin, sharp piece of ash wood. "They only open for the person it belongs to, so long as you place a small dot of blood on the sheath, it will appear as a simple hairpin. They're rather handy, for us females to keep around..." she trailed off.

Having something... Something to protect you could be nice, even if it wouldn't be much help in the end. But for peace of mind... And it could be nice for Feyre to have one, in case her magic is drained from her somehow...

Your eyes trailed back down to the hairpin that had drawn you to the stall.

A silver sheath with pink hydrangeas on the end, tiny flowers dripping down a short chain, tinier diamonds filling in the spaces between them. It was absolute perfection.

Another silver hairpin drew your eyes, this one with crescent moon at the end, a large sapphire hanging between its edges. Dangling from its bottom edge were two chains that met an inch down to continue as one, covered in small sapphires and glittering diamonds. Very Feyre.

"I'll take the both of these, please," you said as you lightly tapped both of them, not quite trusting yourself to hold them and not drop them.

"Ah, those are two lovely picks. May I ask who they are for?"

"The flowers are for me, the moon for my sister," you answered, watching as she carefully placed each in a velvet bag.

"What account would you like to credit it to?" She asked once she had tied off the bags, opening up the thick ledger next to her.

"Uh... Y/N Archeron, I suppose?"

"Ahh, the High Lady's human sister! If the crescent pin is for her, you chose perfectly," she said with a wink as she handed the hairpins to you.

Your nose scrunched as you smiled, "It is, and I thought so as well. Thank you so much...?"

"Opal. I'm always happy to sell my work to appreciative eyes," she said with a sparkle in her eyes.

"I may be back for another, at some point. Have a happy Solstice," you said cheerily as you left her stall, walking carefully after you spotted a patch of gleaming ice.

"The same to you, Y/N!"

The Palace of Hoof and Leaf proved perfect for finding tins for the sweets you would be baking, with an entire store dedicated to gift boxes.

Nesta and Cassian would be receiving one with a scene of the Illyrian mountains, a blazing bonfire the centerpiece, flanked by said mountains in the distance. For Elain and Lucien you picked a scene reminiscent of spring, a pond surrounded by trees with a clearing in front of it. In the clearing is a small, brown bunny, watched from bushes by a red fox. Very fitting, considering how Feyre always called Lucien a fox.

Rhys and Feyre would be getting a box decorated with the three peaks of Ramiel in the dead of night, a bright silver moon and speckles of stars lighting the sky. Perfect for the High Lord and Lady of Night.

Mor is receiving a tin with the view of Velaris at night from the House of Wind, what she had told you was her favorite view of the city.

And for Azriel, you chose one covered by a view of the sea from the cliffs of Velaris, late into a sunset.

You were satisfied with your choices, and left the Palace to cross the river and enter the Palace of Thread and Jewels.

Here, you found most everything else that you needed.

For Nuala, you got a new set of embroidery hoops as you had noticed hers were a bit worn, and truly she could never have enough seeing how many projects she had going at all times. In the same shop you picked out a variety of threads, including a selection of metal threads as she had mentioned a month or two ago that she wanted to try using them.

Before you left, you picked up a few skeins of soft yarn in jewel shades for Cerridwen, as well as a pair of knitting needles that were charmed to not lose any stitches if you accidentally dropped them.

You wandered further into the Palace, eyes grazing over beautiful gowns and spools of fabrics before they caught on something.

Red leather thigh high boots, a pair of matching gloves displayed in the same window.

That was a perfect present for Mor. You had even seen her in a pair of similar boots in black, so you knew they were her style.

And red. Her absolute favorite.

The boots and gloves were purchased quickly, tucked into a bag that you slung over you arm with the other two. You continued your journey, looking now for something for Azriel.

Quickly though, you found another present for the twins. A nice apron for both of them, one in a pale golden color with a silver moon and stars embroidered along the chest for Nuala, and a midnight blue apron, with similar silver stitching for Cerridwen. A nice apron always made you happy, and these ones seemed cute enough and close enough to each twin's typical color palette that they might wear them.

You ended up finding a nicely bound pale blue diary, almost the exact shade of Feyre's eyes.

If she was going to document her pregnancy in paint, she may as well have the option to document it in writing.

You explored the last few buildings of the Palace before giving up on a gift for Azriel from the shops it contained. You'd rarely seen him in anything but his Illyrian leathers, so you couldn't pick out a piece of clothing that you knew he would like. And he seemed to have all the gloves he would need, nearly always having a pair on hand.

The only thing you could think of...

Perfect!

You made your way back across the Sidra, through the Palace of Hoof and Leaf, and passed through the Rainbow before landing in the Palace of Flame and Steel.

You were searching for a dagger.

The Shadowsinger always had a dagger on him, if not an entire belt of them. Surely he could always use one more?

Twenty minutes spent wandering through the Palace had you shivering and slightly frustrated. Nothing seemed right for him, the hilts either entirely plain or completely encrusted in jewels.

While you were sure the plain would be just fine, you wanted something that seemed like him.

Not that you knew him very well.

You frowned as you entered a shop, its display window filled with knives, swords, and axes. Warm air rushed over you, smoothing your smile into a neutral expression as you took in the overwhelming amount of weapons inside.

An entire side of the shop was dedicated to knives and short swords, which you immediately gravitated towards.

There was some of the same fare you had seen outside, yes, but most of the knives had subtly decorated hilts, a good middle ground in your opinion.

You picked over them carefully with your eyes, trying to find one that Azriel may actually like to have. It was difficult, but you finally found one that you thought he might like. Fairly simple, a five inch blade with a black leather hilt, a small sapphire crescent moon on both ends of it. The gems matched his many siphons, and the knife came with a plain black leather sheath, a metal clip on one end so he could attach it to a belt if he wanted.

Your final purchase completed, you trudged back to the River House, taking as long as you could. You knew at this point that people would be awake and buzzing about, and you hardly wanted to speak with any of them. All you wanted was to put your Solstice presents away, make some tea in the new pot Azriel had gifted you, and eat the slice of cake that had been brought to your room some time last night.

Still, you dragged yourself back inside, shaking the snow off of your boots before you shut the door behind you. Quiet chatter was coming from the living room, but you paid it no mind as you snuck upstairs, shutting the door behind you softly.

The bags of presents were slid underneath the bed for safekeeping and to be away from any prying eyes. The only thing you kept out was your hairpin, the velvet bag soft as sin beneath your fingertips.

Should you...? Yes.

You shrugged off your hat and put it back in its spot, then your coat and replaced it on its hanger, leaving you in your dark blue wool dress and winter boots. Those were next, changed instead to your warm and fuzzy pink slippers.

Gently, you used the inside of the hairpin to prick your finger, and after replacing the sheath placed a drop of blood onto the metal, which sunk into it a moment later.

You went into the bathroom, your brand new hairpin in hand, and brushed out your hair. It took a couple of tries, but soon enough you had your hair secured in a bun, hairpin stuck through the middle. The petal chain hung down, and the sight of it in your hair made you tear up a bit.

Leaving the bathroom and going to your desk, you picked out a tea from the sampler that Azriel had gifted you, this one a strawberry green tea. You then pulled your new teapot and cups out of their box and braved the walk downstairs to the kitchen with all the items you needed for your relaxing afternoon, hopefully followed by a restful sleep.

When you entered the kitchen, it was blissfully empty, the rest of your family seemingly chatting in the living room, the buzz of which you could just barely hear.

Water was set to boil and you quickly washed the teapot and cups, a dish towel drying them just before the water began to boil. Tea leaves were poured into the strainer, hot water poured slowly and evenly over them.

It could almost be an art, you think.

"Oh, Y/N," Feyre said from behind you, just as you set the kettle back on the stove. "Could we- could I join you for tea? In your room I would guess?"

Lip between your teeth, you thought on it. As far as you could tell, Feyre hadn't wanted your birthday to turn into her pregnancy celebration. She had noticed you hadn't had cake...

"I suppose. For a cup," you replied, attempting to set a boundary with her.

Feyre nodded her head in agreement, a soft smile on her face as she watched you place two cups on a tray, the other two finding a place together in a cupboard. You waited another minute before removing the leaves, emptying the strainer and washing it. Once the pot of tea was on the tray, the two of you went up the stairs and into your room.

The tray went on your dresser, and you gestured for Feyre to take the squishy armchair in the corner of the room as you poured tea for the both of you. You passed Feyre her cup before pulling the chair at your desk over to her and sitting, your own cup of tea in hand. A cramp rippled through you, but you forced down any discomfort so that you could get this conversation out of the way.

"How are you feeling? Any morning sickness at all?" You asked Feyre, blowing on your tea after.

"A bit, but I've been having some ginger tea as soon as I wake up, and that seems to have helped." Feyre paused, taking a sip of her tea. "Mm, I like this one. Is it one that Azriel got you?" You nodded, taking your own sip. It was good. "And the tea set he got you is really pretty. I... I really didn't want for your birthday to end that way, Y/N. We tried to hide my scent but I guess something went wrong or... I don't know, but I feel so bad that we ignored you again," Feyre said tearily. "I really didn't want that to happen, I swear."

You sighed as you looked at her. You had already suspected it, but it still hurts. "I know you didn't Feyre, but it's still... It wasn't fair to me."

"I know it wasn't. I'm so sorry, I don't... I don't know how to make it up to you," she said quietly. "I... We're all going up to the cabin the day before Solstice, and staying through the night of Solstice. Did you... Did you want to come? Or you could stay here, if you'd prefer. I know last year was... Well, Nesta..."

Your mouth fell into a straight line as you thought back on last Solstice.

An absolute nightmare.

Nesta had been overly aggressive to you, still fully controlled by her rage and new mating bond. And just, overall, you had felt so out of place and unwelcome in the otherwise cozy cabin.

And on your cycle? Contained to an even smaller area?

"I'd rather not, if that's... If it's alright with you, Feyre," you said hesitantly, taking a nervous sip of tea after you finished speaking.

Feyre nodded her head in understanding. "I thought you might not, so I have one small ask: Would you be willing to have lunch with me on Solstice? I still want to see you, and spend time with you, if you'd like?"

The request was something you hadn't expected from your sister. Lunch?

"I think... I think that would be nice, Feyre. I'd like that."

Feyre's expression lightened at your acceptance, though her eyes still held unshed tears. "Really? Oh, thank you Y/N, I'm so excited to spend some one on one time with you!" Feyre said, as close to a squeal as you thought she would ever get. "And I do have a Solstice present for you too, I wanted to make sure you were celebrated then too." Feyre finished off her cup of tea and stood, placing it on the tray before standing in front of you. "Could I... Have a hug?"

A small smile played on your lips from the hesitant way she asked. You simply stood from your chair and set down your teacup before pushing yourself into her arms, savoring the warmth of her as you held each other.

"I'm looking forward to it too, Feyre. And I have a few presents for you too, so we can do a little exchange," you said once you pulled away from her. You looked at her- really looked at her. Your smile grew. "You're pregnant!"

Feyre was grinning as the tears finally fell from her eyes. "I am! I never thought- I never thought I would find a man that I would actually like enough, Y/N," she confessed through her tears.

"I know you didn't, Fey. I'm so happy you found Rhys."

The two of you embraced again, this time in joy of her expected child.

"Well, I should get back to work, I think. I've been planning an after-Solstice revel for the Hewn City as a way of breaking some of the barriers between us, but dealing with Kier..." Feyre sighed. "He's such a pain, but I don't truly have anything against the other citizens, so I'm pushing through. You're welcome to come, if you'd like?"

You instantly shook your head. "No, the one time I went I was so uncomfortable, I think I'd rather hear about any drama after, please."

Feyre's head bobbed. "I thought that might be the case. No worries there, sissy, but... You will come to Starfall, yes?"

"I'll be at Starfall, Fey, don't worry," you reassured her as the two of you made your way to your bedroom door. "Good luck with the planning, from what Mor has said about Keir he's... kind of the worst, right?"

Feyre chuckled. "He definitely is, Y/N. I'll see you later."

"See you later, Fey," you said, watching as she walked down the hallway. Your door shut softly, and you returned to your tray of tea.

One more cup, and you would do your skincare. And a bit of cake, as well.

🤍🤍💝🤍🤍

Two days later and the Inner Circle was departing for the winter wonderland of a cabin Rhys had, and you were in the living room seeing them off with Nuala and Cerridwen.

"Have a good time!" You said cheerily, mainly to Feyre and Mor.

"Oh, I'm sure we will," Feyre laughed, sending a mischievous look to her mate before turning back to you. "I'll see you tomorrow at noon, right?"

You nodded in agreement. "Definitely, Fey."

"Good! Have a good day here, you two take care of her, alright?" Feyre asked the twins, who nodded enthusiastically. "I'll see you tomorrow!"

She and Rhys winnowed off, taking Cassian and Nesta with them, along with their bags.

"Y/N, I had an idea, if you're up for it?" Mor asked once they had left, taking Feyre's previous spot in front of you.

"Depends on what it is, Mor."

"Well, I thought that I could come back ahead of everyone else tomorrow night, and the two of us could have a cozy little sleepover! Lots of hot cocoa, chocolate, staying up all night talking. How does that sound?"

You grinned at her, so happy to have her as a friend. "I would love that Mor!"

"Perfect! I'll most likely be back before dinner, but I will send a note if I'm going to be late." Mor's expression matched your own as she turned to leave, taking Elain, Lucien, and Azriel with her as she winnowed.

And then you were alone with the twins in the River House, much quieter than it had been all morning.

"So... Are you two fine with starting to bake now?" You asked both of them.

"That sounds perfect, Y/N!" Nuala said, clapping her hands together.

"We do have a Solstice present that we'd like to give you early, though," Cerridwen offered.

You thought back to the aprons you had gotten for the two of them. "In that case, I have one for each of you as well."

"Meet in the kitchen in five minutes?" Nuala asked.

"That sounds fine," you said, already rushing over to the stairs.

As promised, the three of you reconvened in the kitchen a few minutes later, all of you holding presents behind your backs.

You passed the two gift bags over to them, and they both handed you a small box.

They insisted that you go first, so you carefully opened the wrapping paper, then the boxes, met with your own set of pink measuring cups and spoons, their size engraved into the handles in the first box. In the second was something that looked similar to a magnifying glass, but the twins showed you its use quickly by having it hover over the recipe book Elain had gifted you.

The glass read out the title, "Decadent Desserts of the Solar Courts of Prythian," and tears filled your eyes.

"It will help you read recipes, or notes, anything really, if the two of us aren't available. We thought it would be a nice gift, seeing how your family has forgotten to teach you to read. This way, you can teach yourself," Nuala explained softly as she passed the glass back to you.

"Not that we wouldn't love to teach you, but... I don't think your feelings about that have changed yet, right?" Cerridwen asked.

You wiped the tears from your eyes as you nodded. "Yes, but this is... This is such a fantastic gift, thank you both so much." You wrapped your arms around the two of them, feeling like you were embracing sisters. "Go ahead and open your presents, I know they aren't much-"

"Oh nonsense!" Nuala interrupted you as she pulled out her apron, running her shadowy fingers over the golden fabric. "This is beautiful, Y/N!"

"I love it, oh, look! They have matching embroidery, Nuala!" Cerridwen said excitedly, running her fingers over the stitching. "These are just perfect, Y/N, thank you." It was your turn to be embraced by them, and you gladly soaked in their kind words and true enjoyment of the present you had gotten them.

"Now that we have presents done, should we get to baking?" You asked, already moving to pull out mixing bowls.

"There's no time like the present," Nuala said, and the two of them sprung into action, grabbing necessary ingredients and cookie sheets.

Baking with the two of them was a wonderful experience, as it always was, but today felt a bit different.

It felt like you were finally having the family holiday time you had craved, baking for Solstice with both of the twins.

The time flew by, and by the end of the day the three of you had made nearly everything you had wanted for tomorrow, the only sweet left unfinished was the sugar cookies. The dough for those was left in the cold box, and all of the other sweets were left on the counters overnight.

Together, the three of you made and enjoyed a hot meal, and ended the night sipping tea and eating a few of the goodies you had made earlier.

The next morning was easy, pleasant as you cut out little trees, ornaments, stockings. You all giggled over your attempts to make an Illyrian cookie, which turned out more like winged blobs.

While they were cooling, Nuala and Cerridwen made frostings in every color possible, and you packed up the tins of sweets for your family members.

Nuala helped you write out little notes of well wishes for each couple, and an extra one for Mor and Azriel stating that you had an extra Solstice present for them that you would give them in person.

And with the presents out of the way, the three of you decorated sugar cookies for the rest of the morning, the color schemes and designs getting more and more questionable as time went on.

That's how Feyre found you at noon, walking into the kitchen after winnowing back from the cabin.

"Feyre!" You exclaimed, dashing around the counter to pull her into your arms. "Happy birthday! Do you feel any older yet?"

"Thank you Y/N," Feyre giggled, squeezing you back. "Not yet, I still feel like a baby."

"Well, you are a baby still, Fey. At least compared to most of Velaris," you said cheekily, smiling when she swatted your shoulder gently.

"Yes well... This baby and my baby are hungry, are you ready to leave for lunch?"

You nodded. "Let me get my coat and boots on, and then we can go."

"Okay, I'll be here," Feyre smiled, and then her eyes locked on the cookies. "Can I have one?"

"Of course you can have one Fey, you're the birthday girl after all!" You said before you left the room, hurrying up the stairs to grab your outerwear.

By the time you returned to the kitchen, Feyre was sitting on a stool, decorating a cookie with precise strokes, turning one of the blobby cookies into something that resembled Rhys.

"That's a pretty cookie, Fey."

Feyre's head snapped up from where she had been entirely focused on her decorating. A light blush dusted her cheeks as she said, "Thank you, sissy. The girls told me you all tried to make Illyrians, and I thought they were just too cute to not do one of Rhysie."

"Well, you did a lovely job. Shall we go?"

Feyre nodded and stood from her stool, licking a small bit of frosting off of her thumb. "You made some really good cookies, Y/N. Are all of the tins filled with them?"

You shook your head. "No, they're filled with everyone's favorites, the sugar cookies were more for everyone. When you go back to the cabin, would you be able to take them with you? If not, I can give them out tomorrow."

The two of you walked to the front door, you opening it for Feyre and shutting it behind you. "I should be able to manage that just fine, sissy. Now, I was thinking we could go to Arlina's, I feel like pasta."

"Pasta sounds nice," you replied, letting Feyre lead you at a leisurely pace, locked arm in arm as the two of you took in the snow covered city.

Arlina's was a cozy little bistro only a few blocks away from the River House, tucked between some apartment buildings. You had been there once before, a few months after you had been brought to Velaris.

Once the two of you were seated across from each other in a booth, you pretended to look over the menu, but you already knew you would be getting the same thing you had last time. It had been very good, and you also wouldn't have to ask for help reading the menu...

The food was as good as you remembered, and your and Feyre's conversation stayed light, mainly focused on Feyre's duties and her hopes for her future, now that she has a little one on the way. You preferred talking about her, talking about your life right now... Would be a bit of a mood killer. And today was about Feyre.

During dessert- a delicious crème brûlée that you and Feyre shared- Feyre started to fidget.

Not much, but enough that you noticed.

"Yes, Fey?"

Feyre sighed at being caught. "You know how Starfall is coming up?" She asked.

Your narrowed your eyes in suspicion. "Yes?"

"I was hoping that you would go dress shopping with me- us," she corrected. "I want you to feel included, and it would be really nice to go dress shopping as sisters, like we were never able to."

Your first instinct was to say no, but this was Feyre. Feyre, who was sitting across from you and giving you her best puppy dog eyes.

You sighed. "Fine, but can you tell the two of them to behave again? I know that they have... Issues with me, but I would like to feel comfortable in a room with them again at some point."

"Oh, I've already told them to behave. Honestly I should have done it so long ago, it's not fair to you. From now on I'll do my best to make sure you can feel comfortable in the family again, okay?" Feyre said honestly, and you finally believed her.

"Okay. What day were you thinking about going?"

"I was thinking in two days time, I have a few meetings tomorrow, and that revel I was telling you about, so most of us will be busy then."

You nodded your head. Two days. You could prepare yourself for Nesta and Elain's inevitable scrutiny over two days. Especially with your evening plans with Mor tonight. "That sounds fine to me, Fey."

Feyre smiled at you widely before taking another bite of dessert.

🤍💝🩵💝🤍

The rest of your afternoon with Feyre flew by, your short walk back to the River House led to presents.

You had given her her gifts first, soaking in the absolute joy in her eyes when she realized that you had gotten her two gifts for her pregnancy journey, already telling you about what she wanted to paint for the first month. And the hairpin she absolutely adored, promising to wear it tomorrow night to the revel after sealing it with her own drop of blood, as you had with yours.

She had nervously handed over your own Solstice present, an apron that she had made for you. It was in a light pink, with slightly clumsily sown stitching, but you loved it so much. Something that she had made, just for you.

You had bid her goodbye after the two of you decorate a few more cookies, her arms now loaded with two bags, filled with tins of sweets.

You made Nuala and Cerridwen rest while you cleaned up, taking care to get every last bit of dough or sugar off of the counters and each dish cleaned.

After, you retired for your room for a while, a bit of light cramping having you in the bath again, soaking in the heat.

Just a few minutes after you had finished getting dressed, you heard Mor yelling something from downstairs.

With your slippers on, you exited your room and went downstairs, happy to see an excited looking Mor sitting in the living room, a couple of gift bags sitting on the coffee table in front of her.

"Happy Solstice!" The blonde said brightly, bouncing out of her seat to wrap you in her arms.

"Happy Solstice to you too, Mor," you giggled after she let you go, air returning to your lungs. "Did you want to do presents now?" You asked, gesturing to the bags on the table.

"If you'd like, or we could wait a little bit. I'm fine with either!"

"I'll go get yours, then," you said, and did exactly that, returning a few moments later, excitedly shoving a bag into her arms. "Open it!"

Mor did so, gasping when she pulled the boots out, and squealing when she saw the matching gloves. "Oh mother Y/N, these are perfect! Thank you so much!" The blonde exclaimed, pulling you into a hug. A playful look crossed her face, a smirk on her lips as she said, "Do you know what these would be perfect for?" You shook your head. "That stupid revel tomorrow! I'm already wearing this tiny little black dress, and these would look stunning with it."

"That does sound like a good time to debut them, it'll probably drive Keir up the wall," you joked.

"Yes it will," Mor sighed happily. "Now, open your gifts! Honestly I should have given them to you earlier, now that I think about it, but they'll still be useful."

Mor had given you several pairs of underwear, these specifically spelled with cycles in mind, making it so there was no noticeable scent, and also designed to come clean with no staining every time. In the same bag was a square herb filled pack, designed to be heated and kept against your skin as a way of minimizing the pain of cycles. Both were such thoughtful gifts, but you were most excited for the underwear. That meant less scathing looks from your judgmental sisters.

The second bag contained a large assortment of bath products, from bubble bath soap to deliciously scented bar soaps, to salt mixes that were supposed to help with aching muscles. She had managed to fit in a bath pillow, one that's able to get wet without being ruined, as well as a few face masks that appeared to lay over your face.

"Mor, these are such wonderful presents, thank you," you said gratefully, pulling her into a hug.

"I thought you might like them," Mor chuckled. "After all, you can never have too many self-care products in my humble opinion."

"Mhm. Humble," you giggled at her. "Did you have anything specific planned for tonight, or are we winging it?"

"Well, I thought we could do some extra skincare, I've already got an order of food in at Sevenda's- I got you curry." You nodded in approval. "And we can talk about how amazing those macarons you made were!"

You blushed under her gaze. "Nuala and Cerridwen helped..."

"Oh, it was all you, Y/N. I'm sure they helped a bit but you are such a wizard with baking!"

You almost went to deny her praise again, but thought better of it when she narrowed her eyes playfully at you.

"Skincare?"

"Skincare," Mor smiled, and let you lead her up the stairs and to your room.

The evening you spent with Mor was great, the two of you eating your takeout in your bed once it arrived, clay masks on your faces. You talked about the last couple days, Mor complaining about how the citizens of the Hewn City treat her, you opening up about how hurt you were over your sisters' gifts.

"I can't believe they forgot, though, Y/N. That's not something small, and I'm shocked that they haven't attempted to teach you yet..." Mor said disapprovingly. "I could help you, if you'd like?"

You shook your head immediately. "No, I'll be able to teach myself now, with a gift the twins got for me. It reads out the words it passes over, isn't that neat?" You asked, hoping she would understand that you'd rather not speak about the subject much.

"That was very thoughtful of them, I wish I'd thought of it!" Mor sighed. "I do hope that you feel more welcome here, now? Than a few weeks ago, I mean."

You glanced at her, seeing the emotion in her face. "I am, Mor. You've been a big part of it, I hope you know," you said softly.

"Good, I'm glad I can help. And you're just such a lovely person, it's hard not to want to spend time with you."

You blushed once more under her gaze. "Thank you, Mor."

"Any time, love."

The endearment she used had a pretty face flashing in your mind, a question on your tongue.

"Is it..." you trailed off, unsure if you wanted to ask the question.

"Is it... what?"

"Is it... normal...? To... to uhm..." you started nervously. "Is it normal to like girls...?" You asked Mor quietly, half hoping she would ignore your question.

"Like... To like girls as friends, or... To like girls like boys?" Mor asked cautiously.

"The... uhm... Boys."

Mor sighed, but not one of disapproval. You didn't think...

"Of course it's normal to like girls in that way, sweets. Maybe not for everyone, but I know that... I know that I do," Mor answered softly.

You turned your face to her, finding her cheeks pink, maybe for the first time since you had known her. "Really?"

"Yes, I've known for a couple of centuries, now. I still like boys some, but... I do find girls much more interesting." Relief flooded your heart at her words. "Can I... Ask what brought this on?"

"Oh, well... When I went shopping for Solstice presents, I met this really pretty shop owner, Irina? And I... I felt how I used to feel around... Cassian," you admitted.

"Well, Irina is very pretty," Mor said wistfully. "You have good taste," she joked as she nudged you gently with her elbow, getting you to smile.

"I do, don't I?" You giggled, feeling lighter with how accepting and calm she had been. The two of you sat in silence for a minute, before you had an idea. You looked over at Mor, a glint in your eyes. "What do you say to eating far too many cookies and passing out from so much sugar?"

Mor's eyes shined brightly in the candlelight of your room. "I say yes."

The two of you snuck downstairs, even though you didn't need to, it just felt right with the copious amounts of sugar you were about to consume.

You set to making a pot of tea while Mor grabbed a sinful amount of cookies and set them on the tray. She carried everything up to your room, you trailing behind her.

Mor had grabbed all of the sugar cookies that you and the twins had decorated all silly, including several deformed Illyrians that the three of you had attempted to make look like the three in the Inner Circle. Plus one of the ornaments that Cerridwen had written swear words on, claiming that she 'couldn't fit any other words on them.'

After a bit more talking, and all cookies eaten, Mor left your room so the both of you could change, and returned a few minutes later with hot chocolate for the both of you, a mound of whipped cream nearly overflowing from the mug.

"I'm really glad you suggested this, Mor," you said quietly once the two of you had laid down in your bed, all candles extinguished. "It's been really nice."

"I'm glad I did too, Y/N. This is a lot more fun than the bickering that I'm sure happened tonight at the cabin, that lot can never go too long in a confined space without arguing about something," Mor complained lightheartedly.

"You included, Miss Morrigan." Mor scoffed at the implication. "Tell me that you don't enjoy the drama a little, hmm?" She remained silent, and you giggled. "That's what I thought."

"Well, it's not my fault that they're so easy to bicker with..." Mor said sulkily before yawning. "Alright, I'm exhausted. Who knew eating cookies and takeout could be so tiring?"

"Not me," you said, yawning a moment after. "I guess that's our cue to try and sleep," you laughed.

"Sounds like a plan to me," Mor said quietly, her breathing evening out a bit as she tried to sleep.

You tried to do the same, but it took a while, with the now unfamiliar noise of someone sleeping near you. But soon enough, you had drifted off into a peaceful sleep, cushioned comfortably for the first time in months.

🤍💝❤️💝🤍

General Taglist: @daughterofthemoons-stuff @lilah-asteria @meritxellao

Series Taglist: @darkbloodsly @angelbunny222 @uniquedreamsblog @romantasyreader28 @that-one-bibliophole @idkmyoldonewasembarassing @deathtopistachios @saltedcoffeescotch @sleepylunarwolf @babypeapoddd @kingshitonly @bravo-delta-eccho @bluebries81 @liahaslosthermind @deepestmentalitypersona @historygeekqueen @hermajestysworld @marina468 @esposamultifandom @astrokitty18 @larissa01-blog2 @acourtofbatboydreams @angel-graces-world-of-chaos @thelov3lybookworm @weekendlusting @dxjaaaa @thejediprincess56 @casiiopea2

[lambypop]

so uhm imma just be writting down stuff cause yes (PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COMENT)

My principal 2 ideas

how this could start is either way patrol goes bad or a Mission with the JL or both combined and everyone is mad at Bruce because yes his paranoia IS a problem but they all could have reacted better beacause THEY KNOW BETTER, Bruce has dedicated his life to try and teach them better than what he knew himself and also had TRIED to keep them out of the "Heroism" beacuse i need to do the reminder that most of them were the ones that started as vigilantes and not Bruce pushing them into that.

his children (imma go more in deep here cause this is the rout i will probably go for):

Dick started because dude has enraged cause his parents died and wanted to track down their killer, and B trained him so he (dick) didnt get killed. Jason was happy being robing cause "it gave him magic" (IT DID, but when a ray of sunshine is to bright the world destroys it)

Tim didn't even wanted to be robin in the first place, i mean ofc he wanted but the baby had many issues, so he looked for Dick and quite literally asked him to "pls be robin again, bat is angy and bein mean to people" by mean i meant HES PUTTING PEOPLE INTO EMERGENCY CARE, eventually i think Dick and Bruce got into troble with BANE and fucking alfred gave the robin suit to an UNTRAINED child and told him "Yo go save them chum" and Tim in his rational mind went to save 2 vigilantes as a child and untrained (alfred IS also the problem),

yes, i havent forgot that Tim did kinda blackmailed Bruce and half-"man-handle" him into self and kind of mental health in some comics, Bruce didn't wanted Tim to be Robin because he still couldn't forget Jason's death wich still haunted him and still does. then Tim almost fckin dies and he needs to stay in bed rest and then

Stephanie is Robin for like a while and then she wither quits or Bruce fires her i think, and she comes back as Batgirl and the Spoiler

Cassandra is literally there by choice, she says it in the comics "Im Batman's Daughter By choice" also she's a trained assasin, she wants to be there, she wants to help and She does not kill.

Duke is Adopted cause of his parents situation (they are jokerized) and he's a meta (also the only bat that does patrols at Daytime) and he was the lider of the ROBINS club, bro literally had a mini gang of people calling themself's Robins to help Batman (i havent read stuff in a while so FEEL FREE TO CORRECT ME)

Barbara was there from the start and even before Dick in some characterizations (or shes as old as Bruce, as she sould be) Girl has gotten DE-aged so many times just to be shipped, GIRL DESERVES BETTER, so she should be older than him atleast by 7 years plssss, and when she started as Batgirl she didn't even worked for bruce.

then there is Maps (Mia "Maps" Mizoguchi) WHICH I will make her appear in the story (she's a student from Gotham Academy, she's also the founder of the "Detective's club") "Her journey as Robin is explored through various comics, including Batman: Black and White. Batman's perspective on Maps' role is officially revealed in The Brave and the Bold #12. Maps isn't just any sidekick; she's a named Robin in Batman's eyes as of 2024." -Google chrome and me cause i read the comic

--------------------------------

it resolves in everyone (exept some) snapping at Bruce and making him for the first time in a LONG time think about throw in the Cowl, yes. imma make it so gutrenching angst and also very fluffy, because Bruce has started to go once a month to a therapy session with Dinah either in person or bya Zoom or somtheing like that and its been doing okay, and the thing is those sessions are just a follow up from the previous stuff he was doing cause in Tim made him go to therapy at first (cause of Jasons death and Bruce's other issues) and this event is just gonna make Bruce just go to france to have a very well needed stayacion.

and well everyone is worried asf beacuse BRUCE WAYNE has dissapeared

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS MONDAY AND HE HASN'T FELL INTO A FOUNTAIN?!

what do you mean he isn't there for the WEEKLY meeting with his workers were he's there just praising how well they work (he has never NOT come)

what do you mean he isnt there for FAMILY DINNER?

what do you mean he is not there for the JL obligatory meet up

what do you mean he isn't on a crazy Yacht party

what do you mean he isn't there when scarecrow gases gotham again? (even tho they can do it perfectly)

what do you mean he isn't at the kent farm like he usually does when he's stressed and he need that pie from Ma' kent

What do you mean he isn't with clark or louis?

What do you mean he isn't with oliver queen doing stupid stuff

What are you in when the Bat-kids (Damian) call the LOA (The League of Assasins) asking if casually they have Bruce (Damian calls Talia to ask if she got her "Beloved" with her)

What do you mean even Ra's Al Ghul is taken aback with the news that his Daughter gave him

Why are the Gotham Villians being nicer???? (B isnt there and they are worried kinda)

What do you mean Bruce Wayne is spotted in DISNEYLAND PARIS with a GROW UP normal child on his shoulder and smiling brighter than a thousand suns with pure and entire Happyness looking at that kid as if it was his entire world??

What do you mean he looks happier without them (he isn't but he really needs a fucking break)

[staybabblingbaby]

Soulmate Garden AU Ch.2 (Anemone) a3d2

[Caution: These are not full fics, or even full parts of fics for some, these are part of my writing progress archive!]

Concept: Growing up, you knew Soulmates weren't all that they cracked up to be. So when, on your 18th birthday, your skin is painted with a garden of flower buds, you resolve to hide it from everyone. Who had ever heard of someone with 8 soulmates, anyway?

Or; Reader has 8 soulmates and no issue avoiding all of them. It's up to SKZ to show her that while every soulbond might not be made of fairy tales, theirs certainly could be.

Word Count: 4,218

Notes: I don't feel like the summary completely matches this story anymore. I'm also not really satisfied with this chapter, but I'm too tired to really get into a whole bunch of drafts and edits, I've just really been feeling poorly lately. The archive is for writing progress anyways, it's fine. I'll probably rewrite this whole chapter if I ever get to where I'd be comfortable posting finished versions to Ao3. I'm also just not fond of my writing style somehow. It feels too formal, doesn't flow enough. Problem is that I really talk like that lmao. Idk, I'll figure it out.

Dividers by @saradika

Warnings: She/Her Reader

Leave me comments or questions or anything! Love hearing from folks <3

Masterlist <3 | Prev Part | Next Part

Bangchan clambered into the van behind Felix, Minho and Jisung loading into the row in front of them. It always felt a bit weird to not spend some time swapping seatmates around based on who was clinging to who at the moment, but on days like today it was easier to just board the vehicles as quick as possible.

He's ended up with a relatively quite combination of their cluster today, and Chan was grateful for it as he settled into his seat with a pained grimace.

He wasn’t sure when it had started, but a persistent on-and-off pain had been roaming around his back for the last twenty minutes as they’d said goodbye to Stays and prepared to leave the venue. He’d be more worried about it, except the sharp, needle-like, pains would settle into a gentler ache before kicking back up again.

As it was, Chan was pretty sure he’d pinched a nerve or strained something and would simply rest when he got back to the hotel. Maybe call up the PT. For now, as three of his soulmates settled in around him, Chan was content to leave it be.

Well, almost. Another twinge of pain makes him wince as he twists to buckle in, and Chan decides that maybe it’d be a good idea to know what he was working with. For comfort’s sake, if nothing else.

“Felix,” He prods the blond next to him, “Can you look at my back for me? I think I pinched something.” He motions toward his lower back, where the majority of the pain had been accumulating.

Felix immediately nods his acceptance, their group’s resident massage expert always willing to lend a hand. Especially if it let him lay hands on his very well built soulmates.

Chan scooches forward and rotates around, balancing with his hand on the headrest of the seat in front of him. He helps Felix shimmy his shirt upwards, struggling with it where it gets caught in the seat-belt.

Chan ends up stuck struggling on his own as Felix chooses that moment to direct his eyes and hands to the afflicted area.

“There’s your first issue,” Felix tuts, “You’ve left your concealment tape on. You’ll give yourself a rash one of these days, hyung.”

Chan gives a sheepish smile from where he’s managed to trap himself in a cloth prison. His head is free, and the shirt his appropriately bunched up over his shoulders and around his neck. Unfortunately, he hadn’t managed to free his hands, so he’s got a bit of a t-Rex thing going on right now. It’s fine.

“I forget it’s there,” he confesses with a whine, “I can’t see my own back, y’know?”

Felix rolls his eyes at their oh-so-glorious leader, carefully peeling the thin material away from Chan’s skin as he scolds, “You still need to take it off. We sweat way too much to not at least change it after a performance.”

He’s bunching up the extra-strength tape to maybe toss at Jisung in the front seat (maybe Minho, if he’s feeling very brave), when he spots something off.

More than half a decade into having found each other, the members of Stray Kids were intimately familiar with each other’s soulmarks. Every drop of color, every line, every curve.

So when Felix looks at the freshly uncovered canvas on Chan’s back, familiar trees, bushes, and rocks painting a forested landscape that describes their impact on their eldest, something new immediately catches his eye.

There, on the fallen log that bridged two banks of a crystal-clear creek, was a moss blanket and a cluster little shelf mushrooms. They added life to the previously defunct object, a little bit of color that couldn’t have been said to be missing until it wasn’t.

The closer Felix looked, the more he saw. A mushroom here, a mossy patch there. Little signs of life and decay that he could have sworn weren’t there the last time he looked.

He looks to Jisung, who’s blissfully unaware.

As the first of their cluster to paint Chan’s skin with color, he was the most familiar with their leader’s mark. Jisung had been too young for his own mark to have appeared when he’d met Chan, but that didn’t stop him from influencing their eldest’s. They all knew he’d spent a lot of time studying Chan’s mark (and Changbin’s when it had appeared, already partially colored in) while waiting for his own.

If there was anyone who’d be more than certain of a change in their soulmarks, it’d be Jisung.

Felix swiftly removes his hands from Chan’s back, earning him a little noise of confusion from the prone man, and reaches over to poke Jisung harshly in the side.

Jisung immediately flinches away from the offending fingers with a loud yelp, attracting the attention of Minho, who’d been peacefully scrolling on his phone. Jisung swiftly fixes Felix with an offended glare, ready to retaliate, but is cut off before he can even try.

“Look at Chan’s mark for me.” Felix demands.

“My mark?” Chan echoes, baffled and alarmed. “What’s wrong with my mark?”

“Nothing, hyung,” Felix assures, “I just need to check I’m not seeing things.”

A series of furtive, silent, and, on Felix’s part, urgent, gestures are exchanged before Jisung finally relents and leans around the back of his seat, grabbing Minho’s for balance as the van departs.

Jisung lazily traces his eyes over Chan’s soulmark. All of Stray Kids had huge marks, but Jisung privately thought that Chan had them all beat. His mark spanned his entire back, not an inch untouched by the image. From shoulder to hip was an oil painting of a mark, filled in from what used to be a desolate landscape to what was now a thriving forest.

Jisung used to think it was so overwhelming to be part of such a mark. To be loved so much, and so deeply. It was evident in every brushstroke of the image on Chan’s skin, and in every action of the man himself.

These days, he found great comfort in it.

He’d gotten so lost in thought as he studied his soulmate’s mark that Jisung had almost missed what had caught Felix’s attention in the first place. But sure enough, his eyes catch on the same log that Felix’s had.

“Oh.” He whispers to himself. “Oh.” He says again, as Minho shoves his head under Jisung’s arm to look himself.

“No, yeah, that’s different.” He confirms, Minho nodding against him, having already spotted it for himself. The two of them find their eyes glued to tiny mushrooms, only sparing a moment to glance at each other before returning their gaze to Chan’s skin, each with their own racing thoughts.

“I thought so.” Felix nods to himself.

“What?” Chan questions, becoming more alarmed by the second, “What’s going on? What’s happened? What’s wrong with my mark?”

Felix lays his palms flat on Chan’s back and begins to rub gentle, soothing, circles. Any changes to a soulmark were stressful at the best of times, and they all knew how much Chan treasured his.

“There’s nothing wrong,” Felix soothes, letting the warmth of Chan’s mark resonating with his touch calm them both as he searches for gentle words.

“It’s just,” He begins hesitantly, “Well, the good news is that you haven’t pinched or strained anything.”

“Good news?” Chan echoes, “Is there bad news?” He lets a nervous giggle fall from his lips even as he relaxes into Felix’s hands.

“Not necessarily?” Felix says uncertainly, “It’s just. Well. Your mark has changed.” He pauses a second and pulls out his phone, quickly snapping a picture and then passing it around so Chan can see. “Something’s been added.”

Felix lets the implication of his words sit untouched in the air as the three of them wait for Chan to process what this means.

Ironically, Chan was the least familiar with his own mark out of all of them. His and Minho’s both resided on their backs so it stood to reason that the two of them didn’t see their marks very often. So it was no surprise that it took Chan several, very long, moments to spot the tiny changes.

When he does, Chan pulls in a deep, stuttering breath. The pain is already fading out to an ache now that it’s been acknowledged and Chan isn’t sure how he feels about the extra confirmation.

He carefully pulls his shirt back down, breaking his soulmate’s line of sight like they hadn’t already burned the image onto their retinas. He doesn’t remove his eyes from Felix’s phone.

“I...” He trails off, “I have another soulmate?” His voice is filled with wonder as he marvels at the picture of his mark. He looks up at the rest of his soulmates currently in the van with awe. “We have another soulmate?”

“Yeah,” Minho whispers, voice choked with emotion, “Yeah it looks like it.”

Felix doesn’t wait for Chan to fully turn around before he’s pulling their leader into a bone-crushing hug, giddy, disbelieving, laughter spilling out of him even as tears prick at his eyes.

“Oh my god!” Felix celebrates quietly as Chan wiggles to return his hug just as tightly. “Oh my god.” The other man agrees.

Even as his soulmates celebrate around him, each feeling their own storm of emotions, Chan can’t quite grasp the reality of the situation.

Stray Kids was a uniquely large soul cluster. From the beginning, when it had become evident that Hannie wasn’t his only soulmate, it had caused issues. Then came Bin, and the rest had followed like dominos. Each time their circle expanded he’d thought “this has to be it, right?” and each time there was a little voice in the back of his mind saying, “No, not yet.”

The issue was that that feeling, that little voice saying ”not yet”, the knowledge that they weren’t complete, had never gone away.

By the time they had all met, none of them could spot anything obviously missing from their marks. All of them were completely colored, lines drawn, images complete. And yet, every one of them felt that hollowness of an incomplete bond.

They’d talked about it a lot. Individually, as a group, in pairs and in quartets and seemingly endless combinations. It was hard, as the years went by, to ignore that nagging feeling.

Chan would always remember Jeongin crawling into his bed in the middle of the night, crying and apologizing for not being enough. Could never forget taking Jisung to a rage room so they could both break down their feelings or drinking with Changbin and wondering if it was wrong for them to be so greedy as to want more when they already had so much.

After so many years, they’d begun to wonder if they were just broken. If they didn’t have another soulmate out there after all, and it was all in their heads.

It had been hard. It was hard.

And now that little blank space in his soul was painted with someone else’s colors and Chan felt whole in a way he wasn’t sure he’d ever experience.

It kind of made him want to cry.

He wanted to cry even more when Felix innocently asks, “So what were they like?” An unmatched eagerness in his eyes as Chan pulled away.

That one guileless question triggers a realization in Chan that has his groaning in despair and slumping forward back onto Felix’s shoulder.

“I don’t know.” Chan mumbles into the shoulder of the slighter man.

“What was that?” Jisung questions from where he and Minho were still turned toward him, obviously as curious as Felix.

“I said I don’t know!” Chan wails, wilting further into Felix’s frame.

“How do you not know?” Minho questions incredulously. Felix gasps as he connects dots he’d been too excited to before.

“I didn’t even know my mark had changed before now,” Chan explains miserably, “I don’t even know exactly when the pain started.”

Jisung sucks in a hiss of air, sympathy splashed across his face. “Oh geeze,” he breathes out, “How many people have we met today alone?”

“Ok, well,” Felix interjects, “Not ideal, but we’ll figure it out!”

Minho turns his incredulous stare onto the optimistic man.

"How are we going to figure it out?" He demands, "Because there were tens of thousands of people in that stadium and I know every single one of us shook dozens of hands tonight."

Felix wilts a little bit even as Jisung comes to his defense, "We kind of have to figure it out, hyung," he points out, "And soon. We're back to Seoul soon."

"Okay but how?" Minho challenges, "And don't give me any 'with the power of love and fate' crap."

"We might have to rely on fate." Chan shrugs, dejected. "It's not like I have a description or anything to give out."

"It'll be okay Channie hyung," Felix pats Chan's back lightly from where they're still entangled together, "It'll have to be."

The van descends into silence as the four of them contemplate their new situation. After a few minutes Chan leverages himself up and out of Felix's embrace to frown aimlessly at his knees.

"Well," Felix breaks the silence, "We don’t have any more shows after this, and we have some days of break time, right?”

“Right,” Chan confirms, “We have tomorrow off and then we’re returning to Seoul to start working on the next album.”

“But officially,” Felix hedges, “We have, like, an entire week off, don’t we?”

“Not quite, but sure,” Chan hesitantly agrees.

“Well, we know they were in town for the concert at least,” Felix continues, “So as long as they didn’t leave the city immediately after, I mean, there's seven more first contacts to go, right?”

“Are you saying we should spend our break wandering around trying for first contacts?” Jisung asks, “Because I’m all for searching for them, but I don’t know that aimless wandering is gonna help.”

Chan holds up his hands to halt that conversation before it could devolve into a bigger debate.

“Let’s shelve that for now, and meet up with the others at the hotel,” He suggests, “We should discuss this as a group anyways.”

He receives a variety of agreements and the four of them settle in for the short remaining drive back to their hotel. He absently hands Felix’s phone back to him and retrieves his own from his pocket to ask the others to meet them in his room.

Chan looks out the window, post-concert fatigue all but a memory. As the buildings pass by, he can’t help but hope that their mystery soulmate was looking for them too.

You reaffirm your decision to never ever meet your soulmates as Taylor loads you into the car, arm wrapped protectively around your shoulder the whole way.

It was one thing when your stupidly large soul cluster was just an idea. Knowledge you held, but unactionable in any way.

It was another when you had evidence, in the form of little white flowers burning with warmth on your skin, that they were real, physical, people.

Even worse when you knew that they were a group of very famous musicians.

You hadn’t actually been sick when you’d texted Taylor, who’d thankfully managed to get all of the autographs he’d wanted before he’d checked his phone to try to find you, but you were getting there. Anxiety had nausea creeping up your throat like molasses.

You’re beyond grateful when your roommate doesn’t question your sudden illness, the both of you well aware that you were hale and hearty when you’d left the house.

Taylor just buckles you in like you’re something precious and fragile and takes the wheel.

The two of you drive in silence the entire way home. It’s not awkward, but you can’t deny the weight of something heavy in the air. The buzz of the concert still lingered between the two of you, and it only made the silence stifling and itchy.

When you pull into your apartment complex neither of you speak for a long moment.

“Sorry for ruining the day.” You murmur to the air in front of you. Taylor just reaches over to pat your thigh and unclip your seatbelt.

“You didn’t ruin anything,” He assures, “Don’t sweat it.” He hesitates a moment before continuing.

“I’m not gonna push,” Taylor begins gently, “But you know you can talk to me, right? Whatever happened, I’m not gonna judge. I just wanna be here for you.”

“What makes you think something happened?” You mutter mulishly. Taylor just gives you a look that has you sinking into your seat.

“It’s nothing. I’m just being dramatic.” You admit. He bumps your shoulder with his and climbs out of the car.

“It’s not nothing if it makes you feel something.” He tells you as he goes. The two of you walk up to the apartment in silence, contemplative this time.

You think about telling him as the two of you separate to wash the concert off of yourselves. You think about it as you take turns using the bathroom and as you make dinner side by side. You think about it as you settle in front of the couch at his feet as his hands automatically pull your head to his knees, his fingers digging into your hair just how you like.

You want to tell him, you decide. You do. It's just that. Well...

Your sister was right, in a way. You’d known Taylor for over a year now, but the two of you didn’t really know much about each other. You really were just roommates.

You didn’t know what his favorite color was. You didn’t know the names of his parents, or if he had any siblings. You barely knew what he did for a living. He’d only ended up your roommate by virtue of you responding to his “roommate wanted” ad with full willingness to be murdered on the spot.

At the same time, the two of you knew everything about each other. You knew how he took his coffee in the morning, that he preferred his eggs dry and over-seasoned. You knew the bands he liked and the games he played. You knew his hobbies better than you knew your own sometimes, and more about his friend’s drama that you ever wanted to.

You know the important things, you think.

You know that every word you tell him in confidence will be clutched tightly all the way to the grave.

“I met my soulmate today.” You confess, your cheek pressed to his knee, half-asleep.

The words somehow feel like they were snatched from the darkest depths of your soul as they spill from your lips. You make no move to take them back.

Taylor’s hand, to his credit, only pauses for a moment. Then he treats your hushed admission like any other comment made while you nod off to dramas the both of you know you only watch for him, resuming the soothing movement of his hand and humming lightly to acknowledge you.

You think it’s that casual treatment that lets you find the courage to continue.

“Well, one of them anyway.” You mumble. Taylor hums his interest, but doesn't take his eyes off of the screen and doesn’t stop petting your hair.

“I don’t want to meet them. There’s so many of them and only one of me, y'know? I don’t even know how to love myself, how am I supposed to love eight other people?” Taylor says nothing still, his eyes glued to an episode of a drama you know the two of you have already finished three times over.

“I’m scared I’ll fuck it up. I’m scared they’ll fuck me up.” Your voice cracks as you breathe life into one of your deepest fears. You realize as you say it that you’ve never voiced these thoughts aloud before, even to yourself.

Tears prick at the back of your eyes when you admit, “I’m not ready for them. I don’t think I can be.”

Taylor finally gives in to the seriousness of the conversation and hauls you bodily up onto the couch. You go willingly, but with rag-doll limpness. He rearranges you to his liking and you find yourself in Gossip Position, sitting criss-cross facing him.

“First of all,” He starts in, his usual levity giving way to a seriousness you rarely see from him, “Don’t be mean to my best friend. I’ll hit you.” You ignore his threat in favor of the warm feeling in chest at hearing him call you his best friend.

Take THAT Ma! No friends your glorious behind.

“Secondly, you are literally the most loving person I have ever met in my life. You would fit the entire world in there if you could,” He pokes your chest, right above your heart, for emphasis, “So I’m not that surprised you have more than one soulmate.”

“I have eight though,” You argue, “Isn’t that weird?”

Taylor just shrugs. “I mean, yeah. But weird is basically your brand, so...” He trails off with a teasing smirk.

You shove him a bit in retaliation, but he just grabs your wrists to still you and continues speaking before you can argue.

“I don’t think eight soulmates is enough for you, honestly,” He muses, “I mean it when I say you’re the most loving person I know. I think you’d even try to take care of Danny if he needed you to.” The mention of Taylor’s very creepy second cousin sends a shiver down both of your spines.

The worst part is that you can’t even argue with him.

“But you know, even with eight soulmates, you don’t have to be with them.” Taylor suddenly switches tracks to reassure you, “They’re your soulmates sure, but you’re your own person. They’re for you, it’s not like they are you. You can live without, if you really want to.”

The two of you let that statement settle for a moment. He’s right, you know all too well. Still, the thought leaves a wad of uncomfortable and complicated feelings lodged in your throat.

After a moment’s pause, you break the silence.

“I have too many years of trauma and not enough therapy money to unpack everything I’m feeling right now.”

Taylor cracks first, and giggles come pouring out of the two of you. The joke wasn’t even funny, but you guessed the two of you had been serious for far too long.

Some minutes later, when the giggles finally die down and you return to watching Taylor’s show, you find yourself with your head on his shoulder.

“Whatever you decide, you know I’m here for you, right?” Taylor quietly picks up where the conversation had left off.

“Sure,” you agree, “Like I was there for you when you cried over a boy I told you wasn’t shit.” You completely deserve the elbow to the side you receive for that comment.

“Shut up, I’m being cheesy!” Taylor scolds with a laugh.

“I’m lactose intolerant!” You complain, but obligingly fall silent.

“Seriously,” Taylor insists, “I’ll be here every step of the way. Whatever you need.”

You wrap your arms around the one of his that you’re leaning on and give a gentle squeeze to show your appreciation. “Thanks Tay.” you murmur.

“Of course. You got me front row tickets to a SKZ concert, we’re ride or die whether you like it for not!” You poke his side to scold him for not being serious after just insisting that you be, but end up having to fight for your life when he immediately retaliates by trying to tickle you.

It takes the two of you quite a while to calm down again, Taylor smug in his victory. He holds your ankles in his lap like trophies of war as you stare at the ceiling. The quiet creeps back in quickly, so you speak.

“I’m just not sure what I want, I think.” You tell him, “I don’t want to meet them. But at the same time, I really do, y’know?”

Taylor nods, “Just let the universe do its thing.” he suggests, “If you’re meant to meet them now, you’ll meet them regardless of what you want. But after you meet them, it’s all up to you.”

You nod along, humming your acceptance of his advice. He’s right, again. You can’t really fight fate, even if you desperately want to. But even within that large restraint, you’re a human being with free will. The world is your oyster and all that.

You let your thoughts fade out and just listen to Taylor yap about the drama on the TV as he finally tunes back into it.

It’s nearly dawn when the two of you decide to turn in, post-concert jitters having deserted you and heavy conversations having taken their toll.

“Did you manage to get their name before you bolted?” Taylor asks out of nowhere as you’re walking to your respective rooms. “Your soulmate’s” He clarifies at your confused look.

“Oh, I didn’t need to.” You answer absentmindedly, already opening your door and dreaming of your cozy sheets. “It was Bangchan.”

You close your door on his gawping face, blissfully unaware of the crisis you’d just sent him into.

Perma Tag List: @Mbioooo0000

[im-not-a-ghost]

A short letter from them <3

Warning : this reading could be triggering.

Group 1

Cards - Surrender, Trust, The Universe, Soul work, Ancestors, Reflect, Page of cups, King of cups, 3 of pentacles, 5 of swords, Black Numen, The Hierophant

I see myself in you. It is troubling as much as it is freeing. I don't love myself enough to admit that I love you. I want to be a better person before I can come up to you.I hate that I have to be away from you. There is nothing I want more than to be close to you but duty calls. I have my own karma to resolve, my own issues and challenges to deal with. I understand now that the Universe let us meet for a reason. I realize that you were a lesson for me to learn. That all good things in life ask for dedication and faith. And I was not ready for you. I had dedication but I didn't have faith. Now I see clearly what I have to do. You awakened something in me I didn't know I had. Now I want to do more, live more, feel more. I want to shine brighter than before. I want to be a person you can be proud of. My ultimate goal is to propose to you. There will be a long way ahead before I can even dream of holding your hand again. In the meantime, I will work harder, better, faster, stronger. I'm sure you know that song too. Let us connect through music. When we're apart, I hope the songs we liked to listen to will keep you company and remind you of me, just as they will remind me of you. I'll hold you dear to my heart. Can you please do the same? ♡︎

Reader's insights : My alarm started ringing as I was shuffling your cards. I was hesitating on keeping the Reflect card and that's when the alarm chimed in so I took that as a confimation that yes this person is a reflection of you. The signs of Taurus, Scorpio, Leo and Aquarius could be significant. I get strong Twin flame vibes from this group. For some of you I pick up on cultural differences. A part of the reasons why this person is scared to come forward is because they're afraid of their family's opinion regarding your connection. They think that they wouldn't be too keen on having you in the family because you are from a different background. But your person doesn't care about your differences, in fact it's what drew them in and it's why they love you. They also were amazed at how similar you could be dispite your differences. I'm definitely picking up on long distance relationships. You aren't in contact with them at the moment or the contact is minimal. This person is going through some existential crisis. Meeting you put everything into perspective. You rocked their world.

♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎

Group 2

Cards - Reflect, Ascension, Withdraw, Play, Power (horizontal), get creative, Wheel of fortune, 7 of wands, 10 of pentacles, ace of swords, 2 of pentacles, 2 of swords

I feel like I constantly have to fight for your attention. You're always busy, always on the go. You always have something to do, something to say to someone that can't wait another day. So many excuses. Do I even matter? Like, do you even care about us? I know you're my soulmate and honestly it frustrates me because I feel like I have to go through so many struggles to just have one happy moment with you, without other people getting their nose in our business. It's always my friend said this, my family did that. What about me? What about what I said or did? What about my feelings? Honestly, do you even want me in your life? Because if you don't I have no problem with that. However I have a problem with you wasting my time and hurting me. I can be pretty open minded I just need people to be honest and mature enough to voice out what's wrong for them. You feel so distant and I don't know what to do anymore with this. To tell you the truth, I'm considering leaving and entertaining other connections because at this point why even bother? When I'm in the mood for more and ready to keep things going you just retreat to your shell and put up a wall between us. At least tell me what's wrong. If I've done something that hurt you I want to own up to it and apologize properly. I can't read your mind.

Reader's insights : I kept being distracted as I shuffled your cards. People might be interfering in this connection to deter you from being with that person if this is a romantic connection. This person thinks that you're seeing someone else and/or playing with them. Before even reading for you and writing what this person wanted to say, I felt a lot of frustration bubbling up in my chest. The cards feel quickly so this person has a lot on their plate. I'm sorry if this reading is triggering to some of you. You can't seem to see eye to eye with this person. There are serious communication issues in this group because I feel like you may be in the same energy as this person. You don't know what they want either, you feel like they keep running away from you. There's a lot of confusion between the two of you as to where this is going and what each other's intentions are. You don't trust one another, it's a battle of egos that seems like it's never ending.

♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎

Group 3

Cards - 9 of pentacles, The Magician, The Star, Page of cups, Temperance, 8 of pentacles, Speak Truth, Movement, Play, The Magi, The Creator, Versatility

Ever since we parted ways, I feel like my life is finally making sense. I feel better in my shoes, better in my skin. And I honestly think it's better this way. My career took a positive turn. I am more abundant. I feel like I'm in alignment with my destiny. I feel like life is finally smiling to me and I can finally work toward what I always wanted. I think going our separate ways was the best thing that could happen to us. Because I know deep down I would have choked being next to you. Being away from you allows me to express my true self. To explore and figure out who I am. To indulge in pleasures I didn't know existed, to give life to dreams I didn't know I had. I feel like I'm rebirthing. I'm finally in control of my life and my destiny. It took meeting you to realize I was not happy and for that I am grateful. I know this isn't what you would like to hear. But for once in my life I want to stop pleasing people and start pleasing myself. I will now give myself the love I deserve and needed. And I hope you can respect that. I am now moving on and flying on my own. Thank you for the memories.

Reader's insights : I felt quite nervous doing this reading, my body was tense. There were remanent energies from group 2 because I kept thinking of their last song The Negative. You might want to check group 2 if you hesitated between group 3 and group 2. It was like this person hesitated saying the things they said because they thought you'd take it personally and they're aware of the wrongs it would cause. But they had to get it off their chest. The signs of Gemini, Aquarius, Sagittarius may be significant.

[mimorugk]

Inquisitor's Question of the Day - part 1

Reuploading my IQOTD from Bluesky to Tumblr. There're 43 questions in here, that I've been answering since January 2025. It's such a fun activity to build my Inquisitor and introduce him to people. All question belong to Bambi (arhimharellan on Bsky). Warning for super long post and strong language.

What is your Inquisitor's name? Does it have a special meaning?

“Hoang” means “gold” in his mother side’s language, an dying tongue that his mother no longer speaks. Gold is also house Trevelyan’s color. As a name, Hoang also means bright as the sun and precious as gold.

2. What is your Inquisitor's class? Does it reflect their personality in any way?

Hoang was raised to be either a Templar or a Chantry brother. He didn’t ask to turned out a mage, nor the Herald. But Knight Enchanter is the something he chose for himself.

It's the family default that Hoang has to learn sword fighting when he was young. He likes it and actually not bad at it. I supposed mages aren’t allowed owning swords in Circles, so Hoang could only spar a bit as a work out. He’s been using a staff until learning about Knight enchanters.

3. How would you describe your Inquisitor’s personality?

Kind, caring, well-mannered, curious, and a people pleaser. He can be quite jealous and competitive, especially when someone has it easy while he has to work so hard. He’s also a perfectionist and wields magic with cautious, instead of pride and style like Vivienne and Dorian. Usually, he’s good with putting on a brave face, acting calm and sophisticate even though he’s nervous most of the time.

All of this because of his sheltered life, his abandonment issue and the way he was raised. Deep down Hoang’s just a vulnerable, insecure man, who’s trying to survive, who cares too much about people.

4. What is your Inquisitor's relationship like with their family?

Complicated. He was conceived before his father married his mom officially, who is a commoner, so Hoang never felt welcomed. It doesn’t help when he’s a mage in a devoted Andrastian/Templar family. At first, visits was frequent. Throughout the years, time between visits start to get longer, letters are no longer responded. Then he was left all by himself. Hoang believes Bann Trevelyan already found out about his son's preference for men. Still, Hoang can't hate his parents, and love his half siblings, sure they feel the same. It’s just the shame, the pain, the mistakes keep piling up and was never resolved. Family is such a complicated thing.

5. Did your Inquisitor have any lovers prior to the events of the game?

Hoang had little experience with romance. It's hard to believe a 30 year-old man like him never had a serious relationship. Sure he has eyes on some fellow mages, even templars when he was in the Circle, but never acted on it, as it is against the rules, and it’s wrong. The closest he could get to a romance is being the sparring partner of a male templar he liked.

Hoang has feelings he couldn’t tell. Desire, needs, and wants he couldn’t name. But Hoang pushed them all down and sometimes the result is a hand down his pants in the quiet of his dorm room.

6. Does your Inquisitor believe that what happened was destiny or a fluke?

Hoang’s been an Andrastian his whole life. He believed in Andraste, in the Maker. He believed than someone has to be chosen, but why *him*? There’s nothing about him that’s worthy. As the events of Inquisition happened, Hoang’s belief started to shake.

7. What drew your Inquisitor to their love interest?

It’s curiosity, turns admiration then attraction. The Iron Bull is everything Hoang isn’t, and that draws him in. Hoang's whole life has been living as how others expected of him, many not even see him as a person, but Bull never treated him as such.

Bull sees through the mage, hangs out with him like one of his friends, and for the first time, Hoang could be comfortable as himself without shame. He doesn't even care if it's just an act by the Ben-Hassrath agent. Then he learns about the vulnerable man behind that casual façade.

They provide each other comfort, keeping the other grounded. They can be who they really are, and complete each other.

8. Who does your Inquisitor struggle to get along with? Why?

A little bit of most people. Mostly, it was Leliana because she’s kinda scary. His first impression on Dorian was great but as soon as he commented about southern mages and slavery…eh. Fortunately, everyone ended up in good terms, except Solas, of course.

9. What religion/philosophy does your Inquisitor believe in?

Hoang was Andrastian for most of his life. He turned away from it after Trespasser and has been an atheist for years by the time of Veilguard. Atheist not in the sense of “I don’t believe Gods exist” but “You might be a god but I don’t worship you and you are not above any of us.”

10. Who is your Inquisitor closest to? Why?

Josie since they’re both nobles and feel related to each other. Hoang likes listening to her gossip and ramble (he’s also a rambler himself). Since he’s the youngest of the Trevelyans, hanging out with Josie feels like having a little sister he never had. They still write to each other years later.

Next must be Cassandra and Vivienne. Hoang admires Cass greatly. Vivienne to him is like a mentor and somewhat a mother figure.

10. Did your Inquisitor side with the mages or the templars? Why?

Templars is the easy answer. Some of the mages were his colleagues but he didn’t know the others. Considering when things happened, a mage is always behind it. However, he knows Templars, he knows what they can do, having being raised among them. Most importantly, he knows magic has is dangerous especially when in the wrong hands, in this case the Venatori. Hoang’s plan is to get to the Templars first, then come back to deal with the mages, a plan that would failed.

11. Does your Inquisitor believe they are the Herald of Andraste?

Hoang denies it all the time, but sometimes he really hopes he was chosen. That he deserves it. That he’s good enough. That everything he’s been through finally means something.

12. What is your Inquisitor's first impression of their advisers?

He warms up to Josephine right away, since they’ve met each other once or twice when they were children. He was cautious about Leliana, because, well, she’s Leliana. She scares him sometimes. Cullen, it’s the respect toward a Templar.

13. Why did your Inquisitor take on the title?

Hoang has no other choice. After Haven, he just wanted to help people, and hoped to redeem the mistake that caused countless mages to die. Plus, it was expected of him, and he always fulfills his duty despite how draining it is, been doing it his whole life.

There’s another reason Hoang won’t admit. He hoped this title could help him become someone else, someone matters, other than “the son Bann Trevelyan doesn’t talk about.”

14. Who did your Inquisitor side with during the events of Wicked Eyes, Wicked Hearts? Why?

Celene on the throne with Briala because Hoang doesn’t trust Gaspard to not invade the Ferelden when he has the power. Still, it was a tough decision and no one win. Hoang thought he was well prepared, that he had the skills to play the Game but shit he was wrong. I mean he was alright, but not that good.

He had to rely a lot on his companions and advisors. Earlier Hoang asked Bull for a dance but by the end of it the guy was too tired, so they just hang out on the balcony and ate the snacks Bull brought. Fuck Orlais and its politic, glad that he’s not from there.

15. What did your Inquisitor decide to do with the Grey Wardens at Adamant? Why?

Recruiting the Wardens. They were at war, there’s a split in the sky, they need every hand possible. Why would the Wardens be punished for their leader’s fault? The Warden were vulnerable, they needed to rebuild, not punishment.

16. Which events of the game affected your Inquisitor the most? Why?

What happened in Redcliffe. Mages, children included are dead, enslaved, corrupted. If he could be faster, choose better... His first big mission and he already fucked it up. What left in Hoang were regret and guilt, that's one of the reasons that made him took in the role Inquisitor.

Falling in love with Bull. When he learned how not to be ashamed of himself and embrace who he is, slowly.

Remember how Hoang wanted to believe that he was chosen? That he matters and everything was worth it? Well that went to the drain after Adamant. He doesn't know what he is anymore.

Losing his faith throughout the events. His family's devoted, he used to sing the Chant with his parents and siblings every night. When he was lonely in the Circle, when he didn't know what to do, he prayed to Andraste and the Maker. Now it's all a lie and none of it matters.

Trespasser, his breaking point. Everything that he's been bottled up, everything he suffered, everything came down and exploded. Hoang disbanded the Inquisition, released himself from duty and released people who served him. It's time for them to rest, and it's time for him to let go.

17. What is your Inquisitor's preferred mount? Why?

Horses is Hoang's thing. They are on Trevelyan's heraldry and everything. Little Hoang watched his father taking care of them, his older siblings sparred on them. He awed at them at the Grand Tourney. He has an Amaranthine Charger named Shae but unfortunately had to leave her behind after Trespasser.

He preferred to stay lowkey, and having a rare horse and a metal arm is huge giveaway. After trespasser, Hoang uses a Fereldan Forder for travelling.

18. Did your Inquisitor drink from the Well of Sorrows? Why or why not?

No. First, it's not something Hoang think he has the right to claim. Second, having the Anchor isn't enough already? Cole and Sera had made the most sense here.

19. Where does your Inquisitor spend most of their time in Haven? Why?

Just anywhere not his room. Early the game, Hoang was used to the dull Circle life, so he tried to find familiarity in Haven, like a routine. He usually goes in Josphine's office to borrow books. He would stop at the stable to pet horses, and the chantry sometimes for prayer.

From the stable, he could watch soldiers, Cass and Cullen, but he doesn't have to talk to them, so it's less lonely from just having people around. Also, the stable is dangerously close to a certain person's tent.

20. Does Varric give your Inquisitor a nickname? Why or why not?

At first it’s only Herald and Inquisitor, later one when Hoang said he just wants Varric being his friend, he started calling him ‘Dimples’. Because, well, the dimples when he smiles. Hoang would take that over ‘Inquisitorialness’.

21. Does your Inquisitor side more often with Leliana, Josephine, or Cullen? Why?

Josie works overtime 😭. Because Hoang trusts her and she goes well with his people pleaser tendency. Leliana is when he needs to be tougher but discreet, to not risk their reputation. Cullen has the least use since his way isn’t align with Hoang’s. Overall it spreads quite even between them.

22. Where does your Inquisitor spend most of their time in Skyhold? Why?

Hoang doesn’t like tight, dark space. Unlike Haven, his Skyhold room is huge, which means he spends more time there doing paperwork. If not his room or the war table, Hoang’s on the move. He has a routine he likes to keep, but comparing to Haven, he’s been venturing out more from his comfort.

He goes from places to places, checking on people and offers help, keeping himself useful, basically just overworking. Hoang still pick up books from the library and stops by the stable. Also, he’s been going to the tavern for obvious reason, even though it’s always so chaotic and crowded.

The garden is nice to stay for few minutes, and the battlements is for brooding. I like to think Bull has to lay on top of him, using his body weight to keep Hoang from getting up, just so he can have 10 more minutes of sleep.

23. What would the Nightmare demon have said to your Inquisitor to rattle them the most?

"The family's shame and now a fraud. You never matter, never done anything right. Ah,that's why they abandoned you. Worthless of a man. Are you even a man? Soon, you'll bring them to destruction, then I’ll devour you. I'm sure your whore mother would be proud."

24. What’s your Inquisitor's favorite location to travel to? Why?

Val Royeaux. It lies on the coast of the Waking Sea, has warmer climate with ocean breeze just like Ostwick, so it feels like home. The people are horrible, but the goods are nice to look at. Plus, they have his favorite Antivan wine.

25. Does your Inquisitor take any specific companions with them? Why?

Blackwall, Bull and Sera my beloved 😭😭 Sometimes Cassandra or Vivienne would take Blackwall’s spot. Varric or Cole would take Sera’s. Bull is a permanent member for obvious reason.

26. What motivates your Inquisitor the most?

It’s been validation for a long time. Don't get him wrong, Hoang cares a lot about others, he thrives for people’s well being and justice. But validation and to be wanted is a part of it. It stays deep down inside him and been there the longest. Sadly living to uphold others’ expectation only gets you so far.

At some point he’s lost himself, he exists like an empty shell, doubting his purpose. When Hoang was dragged back into the role in Veilguard, it’s like a nightmare coming back, but he must face it. Now he wants freedom, he wants peace, and Solas the only thing in between. This time he’s prepared.

27. What animal do you associate with your Inquisitor?

This is cliché but I did some personality tests as Hoang, and most of the results are dog. Golden retriever. Loyal, needs close relationships, needs to please others, full of compassion and empathy, doesn’t like changes. I would just keep it until I can think of another animal.

28. What’s your Inquisitor's least favorite location to travel to? Why?

Emprise du Lion. Hoang's mom migrated from south Tevinter, he was born and raised in Ostwick, a city by the ocean. He’s not built for snow and ice. Haven and Skyhold weather is tolerable but EdL is just horrible. He's wrapped in layers of fur it's difficult to move while Bull has his tits out, it's unfair. Fallow Mire gets an honorable mention for obvious reason.

29. What did your Inquisitor choose to do during Iron Bull’s quest?

Something inside Hoang screamed for just sacrificing the Chargers. As Inquisitor, with that much power, you need to make decision nobody can, suffer things nobody can endure. But Hoang Trevelyan isn't a good Inquisitor.

Hoang and Bull share the similarity of being seen as a tool, a symbol. He understands how important it is to find people who's true to you. The Chargers are Bull's family, and Hoang's people. Besides, Hoang has lost too many lives, he couldn't bear to do that to Bull, a man who is so important to him.

He had fear this decision has consequences, but coming back to Herald's Rest, seeing the man he has a crush on drinking and laughing with his found family. Maybe he can endure this consequence. 30. What are some random facts about your Inquisitor?

Accidentally flirted with Cassandra, which led to an awkward convo. It was a misunderstanding.

Favorite desert is Antivan lemon cake, would share it with his horse. Mom's egg tart is also a fav but he hasn't had it in years.

Tried different hobbies but not really stick with one, ended up picking knitting somewhere end-game since he can do that while working, and it's functional.

Competitive when he was a teen. Hoang ruined a classmate’s potion so his can be the best in class. Little fucker got away with it, but did NOT get the highest score.

Clean freak. Hoang dusts the chair before sitting, even brings his own utensil to taverns. Got stared at by his companions the first time he pulled them out.

Loves romance novels, even smutty ones. There was a phrase where he took novels in his dorm room to read through the night, then started fantasizing. He won’t tell anyone, and he will not read them in the open like Cassandra. A noble Inquisitor needs to appear ‘sophisticated’. Then Cole knows, Josie knows, then Dorian. And once they know, everyone know. Cassandra just smirks.

31. What could someone say to your Inquisitor that would hurt them the most?

When he was a child it’s “Why can't you be more like your brother and sister?". Now he’s heard enough from strangers to be bother. It stings, but easily dismissed. However, if the people he cares about say things similar to what Nightmare said, it’s over. It’s not about what is said to him, but about who said it.

32. What is your Inquisitor most self-conscious about?

The good: His look. Doesn’t have the suave but definitely easy on the eyes.

The bad: How easy it is for him to be nervous. His cautiousness when he wields magic, which roots in lack of confidence. How privileged and sheltered he was before Inquisition, which took him awhile to be conscious about.

33. Does your Inquisitor have any special talents outside of fighting?

His ability to focus. As a noble Hoang is well educated, and he wants to be good at everything (fear of not being good enough), so he tried different hobbies. Not a lot of them stand out, but he realizes he can focus really well. That makes him reads faster and uses magic better, making up for the nervousness.

He also likes to pay attention to small details no one cares about. Back in the Circles, he would noticed the change in hairstyles, jewelries on women and compliments them. Niche but Hoang can recognizes the taste of different bottle of wine. If you swap his favorite wine with a similar one he will know.

34. What does your Inquisitor do for fun in their free time?

Free time sounds luxury. Plus, Hoang feels empty if he doesn't do anything. Even in the Circle he still find thing to do. So usually he'd make himself useful, pick up new skills, practice old ones.

He also likes to spend time with his inner circle (they make sure he don't die from overwork). But really, Hoang misses Ostwick. If he had time and can go home right now, Hoang would take Shae the horse for a ride from the hill to the beach and probably just try sitting there. And breathe.

I suppose Hoang is the type of person who has to keep themselves active. If he stops and lies down, he would never wants to wake up, because he doesn't realize how burned out he is.

35. How does your Inquisitor feel about the Tevinter Imperium?

Like most southerners, Hoang holds resentments against the Imperium, not just political, but also personal reason. His mother was still a babe when her parent fled Tevinter to the Marches. Stories about evil magisters destroyed her village and used people for blood magic sticks with Hoang. They also contributes to his fear of magic. Hoang turns out a mage is just ironic. He hates its culture and government, and he *tried* to be fair with people from Tevinter. Discussions with Dorian were awkward. Took him nerves to not be angry when slavery and blood mages were brought up.

Hoang warmed up to Dorian eventually, now that he knows they have the same family problem (homophobia 💕) and share a lot in common.

Bonus lore: There was no mages in Lady Trevelyan’s village nor her bloodline (maybe 1 or 2, but it's been so long since the last one). Therefore her hometown is at the bottom of social hierarchy (above elves since they’re human). Local noble family want their land, and they were considered disposable, hence the destroy of the village.

36. Does your Inquisitor take the time to hunt the dragons in Thedas?

Dragons scared the shit out of Hoang, but ever since Iron Bull told him about the dragon tooth necklace, well guess he has to hunt one now. People do dumb things when they’re in love, and Hoang was so pathetically in love.

He actually enjoyed the hunt, it’s the adrenaline rush. The celebration with Bull is a great bonus, especially when Bull slipped and called Hoang kadan, really made him want to get on his knees and...uh..pray. If Hoang can kill a dragon, he feels like he can do anything.

They hunt dragons when they’re a danger to the area, which is most of the time. His party switches up between Sera, Blackwall, Cole, Viviene and Cassandra with Bull as the permanent one. He loves seeing Bull happy. And, gazing at Hoang's ass and thighs as his coat tail flipped up, while dragon blood spilled everywhere, makes Bull happy.

37. Did your Inquisitor try to impress the court at the Winter Palace? Why or why not?

Hoang did. The Inquisition needs all support it can get, and as his responsibility, Hoang will get it. He even practiced ahead of time with Vivienne and Josie. Viv offered to help with the dancing since it’s been so long. Hoang actually isn't bad at dancing nor the Game especially after 2 wines for confidence boost.

Unfortunately despite how much he tried, Orlais still bite him in the ass 2 years later.

38. Who was your Inquisitor most excited to see again during the events of Trespasser? Why?

Thom. Hoang writes to the others once in awhile, and Bull sticks around between jobs, but he hasn't heard from Thom for so long. It hurts Hoang when discovering his lies, since he admired that man so much. It hurts him even more sending Thom to the Wardens, knowing he'll die eventually, but it must be done. It was a relief that Thom's doing well. Hoang picked up knitting during this time, a hobby he actually enjoys and can do during work, so he brought Thom a little griffon plush. Next is Cole, since the kid seem to struggle with being human.

39. Was your Inquisitor surprised by the reveal of Solas being the Dread Wolf?

Yes and no. Hoang has suspicion, now everything makes sense. Still, mostly anger and feeling betrayed that took over him at the moment. He has every right to, because someone who he spent the first moment of this journey with, someone who called Hoang A TRUE FRIEND, is also the one behind all this.

Solas’s plan angered him the most. He’s the final straw that broke all of Hoang’s patience and tolerance. Oh to think 10 years later when Rook asked about the Inquisitor, Solas still only sees him as “useful”, as if there wasn't anything between them.

40. If your Inquisitor could have one wish, what would it be?

To live like a normal person, no title, no politic. It might sounds selfish, but despite the world needs fixing, he won't be that person anymore. Guess wishes are just wishes.

41. How did your Inquisitor feel about Mother Giselle?

Hoang was honored to have her. He was raised Andrastian, so he respects someone like her. Giselle's been a real help. She made Hoang almost believe he was the Herald. Until he heard the rumors. It's the first time Hoang talked back to a Mother, defending Dorian and himself.

It was jarring and anxious for Hoang, since he's been keeping his preference secret (mostly). After that he remained professional, but tried to avoid her. Giselle isn't a bad person at the core, but he doesn't feel comfortable talking to her anymore.

42. From the beginning of Inquisition to the end of Veilguard, did your Inquisitor's view on Solas change?

Drastically. Hoang respects Solas and learns a lot about magic from him. His POV is fresh, nothing Hoang's ever heard in the Circle. He wouldn't consider Solas a close friend, but a friend nonetheless, and the elf's feeling seem to be mutual. Hoang was wrong. After Trespasser, all Hoang has left was anger.

10 years later, the anger is less intense, but the fire is still there. He deems Solas to be beyond saving and nothing can convince him otherwise. Varric was the proof of it.

43. If your Inquisitor could change one decision they made during the events of the game, what would it be?

He wouldn't bother kissing that many ass in Orlais, and if he can have one more, he would order Leliana to not kill that spy. Hoang was nervous, wondering if he even had the say, he didn't know how things work during those first days, so he stepped aside. When she brought that up later, it hurts. Now she seems fine, but he knows it's his fault that she's hardened.

[batbusiness-schooldropout]

Unfortunately, I'm low on inspiration for our Girl's Night adventure. I shall leave off with what Bruce thinks is happening and what is actually happening. Feel free to take the story and do whatever you want with it, just tag me or something.

Bruce's Idea:

Conner ran afoul of some magic and is now up the duff with Tim's kid. Tim, being a paranoid gremlin, has called in a favor with Barbara and she is having a facility built for the purpose of caring for mother and child (Yes, Bruce does get a new gray hair everytime he thinks about what Tim and Conner have done).

Phantom is mostly likely hired muscle and a go-fer for the group. After the information about the pregnancy gets out, Tim receives a phone call, most likely about a health concern given his behavior and leaves. Probably to resolve whatever issues arose before returning and bold faced denying anything to do with the plot outside of threatening to explain in great detail how Conner's condition came to be

What is actually happening:

Someone was able to get a message to Oracle asking for help for 2 metas, one being very sick and the other injured. They said that they were being hunted by the government and that they needed to keep a low profile. (Ellie could also be heard shouting that if they were bringing a pity party, to not come at all) Oracle calls up her most trusted enforcers, Steph and Cass, who decide to disguise the mission as a Girl's Night that just took too long. Dick was invited because the "cruiser but secretly a bruiser" is a stick shift and only hipsters and old people know how to drive those.

After picking up Selina and the Fentons, they split into 2 teams with members coming and going to keep any one person from having a clear idea of what's going on.

One team is working on turning an abandoned building of some kind into a one room hospital. (Not important but they had to go out of their way to get old equipment because no one wants to risk any ectoplasm or magic mixing with new technology in unexpected ways. You wouldn't want the bed to start raising itself after all)

The other team is working on gathering intel on the GIW and sneaking any ghosts out that they can. The goal is to have everything ready to execute a raid within hours, if not minutes of the Anti-Ecto Acts being repealed.

Out of fear that the Justice League and its members might be traced back to the operation and jeopardize everyone's safety (if Vlad finds out what's happening, there's no telling if he'll possess a hero or not) Oracle tasks Tim with the civilian side of things. Some concerned reporters happen upon the Acts and write about them, and some equally concerned billionaires throw their opinions (and money) into the conversation, and public concern grows, and you know how this song and dance goes.

For better or worse, she also tasks Tim with ensuring that everyone, including the man himself, is too distracted to notice Bruce's finances. Since he's bank rolling the whole operation, even if he doesn't know yet. Tim decides to call Conner to unleash their greatest distraction plan. The old-fashioned "Teen Pregnancy Scare" tactic. The fact that they are both male barely slows them down or convinces anyone that they're lying.

Everyone looking at them is like, "I'm pretty sure you're lying, but with all the shit you all get into, I can't rule out honesty"

(Also maybe Ellie has to revert to a core and she needs someone to "carry" her. Before anyone else can process the information, Conner sees an opportunity for more chaos and volunteers. The absolute flabbergasted look on Clark's face when he sees a medical record detailing his progress was priceless)

[songmingisthighs]

Lonely Breeze

group : ateez

pairing : poly!yungi × reader

genre : angst, hurt/comfort

wc : 3.1 k

tw : angst, poly relationship, heavy stuff maybe; relationship issues, psychological issues, mentions of blood (injury), mentions of anxiety, ngl I'm just rambling at this point so if this is not your thing, pls skip lol.

a/n : this is why i don't listen to anything produced by mingi. I'm textbook kubler-ross every single time and idk how to feel about it. and yea i wrote this in 2 hours

buy me coffee ?

It had been three days since you ran away.

Can it be counted as running away? You're a full-grown adult with intact mental faculties and 'running away' sounds rather juvenile.

Life had gotten too hard and you were overwhelmed. Despite having wonderful boyfriends like Yunho and Mingi, this time you truly didn't know what to do but you knew that you had to get out of there before you completely exploded.

To be honest, Yunho and Mingi were one of the reasons you had to run away.

It was nothing against them per se but you felt bad for having to always rely on them all the time.

The three of you met on the cusp of adulthood, at a dance academy workshop. The three of you didn't mean to join that joint workshop because each of you was from different area branches of the academy but you all just clicked. From then, you and they planned your lives together even down to which university you three will attend. But it wasn't until nearing the senior year that you three decided to pursue a romantic relationship. You still remembered it like it was yesterday. How you, Mingi, and Yunho join your other friends on a countryside trip to celebrate the end of the 6th semester only to find out that the cabin was at maxed capacity so you three had to rent a small, dusty place on your own. Little did you know, you, Yunho and Mingi had each planned separately to come clean about your feelings. You were the first to confess after having a particularly tiring clean-up session (just so you won't inhale the dust that had accumulated in the cabin), accidentally telling them how you could see the three of you in your 30s cleaning the apartment you will share together. You remembered the dread that washed down on you when Mingi asked what you meant. Like the reliable pillar he is, Yunho was the one who helped you calm yourself down and told you that he could see the same thing, how he felt the same way about you and Mingi. Then Mingi confessed his own feelings and from then on, you three were even more inseparable than you had ever been before.

While it surprised people that the three of you decided to commit to a relationship that was far from orthodox, no one was really fazed. Everyone who knew the three of you had at least assumed you three were sleeping together which was why no one approached either one of you romantically all through university.

Some called it fate, some called it dedication.

You believed in the former more than the latter.

But recently?

You feared that you had trapped them.

Maybe it was a quarter-life crisis but you suddenly felt nauseous at the thought of your life. It wasn't like things were falling apart. On the contrary, the pieces of your life were finally falling into place; you were starting to really shine at work, and you were finally able to start saving whilst resolving some of your financial issues. Your relationship with your boyfriends was even at its peak, there was more love than the three of you ever needed and you three were beyond happy.

Then one day, one day a week ago, things crashed down on you.

You didn't know what it was, you didn't know what caused it, but you suddenly couldn't breathe. You remembered holding onto the bathroom sink while your body trembled, tears streaming down your face like a busted faucet and you couldn't move. The cool bathroom suddenly felt suffocating and the sound of your boyfriends laughing just on the other side of the door felt deafening. It took you a long while to break free from that state and you only managed to do so because Mingi had knocked on the bathroom door asking for you to let him in because he needed to use the bathroom. That night, you found yourself unable to sleep and even finding their presence too much for you to handle even after switching position with Mingi so you could be at the edge. You had slipped away and cried yourself to sleep on the couch, sobbing silently until fatigue took over.

That whole week you were distant until three days ago when you came home from work to see a note on the table from Yunho who let you know that they were out for a bit to get something special for you.

One second you were pouring yourself a glass of water to calm your trembling hands and the next, you were in a train with a duffle bag heading to the countryside, cradling your hand that had a gash and fresh dried blood.

When you arrived at the dark and lonely cabin, you finally broke down, wailing into the emptiness as you hugged yourself in the middle of the room.

Neither of them was aware of what happened.

Or so you thought.

The first person who noticed how distant you became was Yunho. He had sensed that something was wrong since that day in the bathroom. He could never forget the look on your face as you stepped out. Your usually lively eyes were empty and you didn't even react when Mingi pressed a kiss on your forehead. At first, he thought that you might have had a bad day and that you were just not in the mood but as the days passed, you seemed more silent and distant. Yunho wanted to ask what was wrong but he didn't want to make it seem like he was prying so he tried to let you know that he was there for you in different ways; soft touches, words of affirmation, little presents in the form of your favourite drink or plans of going on a trip. He wanted you to have all the space you needed.

Mingi on the other hand immediately jumped into worrying about you. Suddenly he kept texting about your whereabouts and your feelings. He had even asked if he should pick you up early from work and even showed that he was already in front of your building. Mingi knew what it felt like to be all alone stuck in a headspace and it had taken him so long and finally relent, letting you and Yunho pull him out and believing you two that you were there for him. So he wanted to repay all that especially since you were the one who gently washed his tear-stained face and slowly fed him until he regained his own strength. He remembered the pit and he didn't like the idea of you being there.

So when they were met with an empty apartment the day you left, they went into panic mode. The sight of a couple droplets of blood near the broken glass and your work bag thrown carelessly on the couch was enough to send them into a frenzy and sadly, they even turned on each other.

Yunho wanted to calm himself and Mingi down first because neither of them even knew what happened and where you had gone to while Mingi, pointing that out, stated that they both needed to catch you before you could even go far. Then they fought over the fact that they were fighting when they should be looking for you and it ended with Mingi leaving the apartment when Yunho ran into your shared room, trying to charge his phone to see if you had contacted either of them.

Essentially, the three of you were alone at that moment in time. Nothing made sense and none of you had any ways of getting an answer.

You were alone in the cabin, crying your eyes out about... Nothing. You felt stupid for feeling bad over your life that was going rather well and you felt bad for leaving your boyfriends without an explanation. It was simple, you could've simply grabbed the phone and texted either one of them to let them know... Something. You could tell them that you needed time alone. But do you really? You could tell them that you were sorry. But were you really? You could tell them that you were overwhelmed and that they were not making your situation any better by being so supportive. But were they really? You felt like you were not worthy to even send them a text because who the fuck were you to be acting like that and then asking for understanding?

Mingi was running around aimlessly with worry sitting deep in the pit of his stomach. He had gone to several of your friends' places, friends you trusted who wouldn't blab about your disappearance. He hated being in a state of not knowing because he felt helpless. He hated being helpless. Mingi was not a helpless person so he didn't want to be associated with the feeling. First things first, he had to find you. But where could you be? Why had he never taken the time to ask you places you wanted to go to, thinking that you had gone alone because he was too busy with himself. Seeds of doubt planted by the negativity of the situation started sprouting its ugliness. Was your leaving his fault? Was he too self-involved to not have taken the time to dedicate his attention to you once in a while? Was he taking too much of Yunho and your attention? His head hurts.

Yunho, in defeat, slumped against the bed you three shared. Your pillar, your rock finally broke down and with each sob, his mind found it even harder to make sense of things. All the decision in his life was made on a strong foundation, Yunho was a sure man, and he didn't regret the choices he made and the path he took. But was he too sure of himself this time? Out of the three of you, Yunho was always the tie-breaker because he makes his decisions carefully and with logic. He never found any reason to resent that part of him until you left. Did he miss something? Were there signs that you had needed a different kind of treatment? Had he gotten too overconfident this time? Had his so-called level-headedness cost him something important?

Whatever it was you hoped could happen or appear by running away alone never came. Each hour you spent trying to make sense of things or finding a way to calm yourself only made it clear that you were all alone.

Dark thoughts started plaguing your brain, skewing your happy memories into something that was far from reality. The memories you had of banding together into a trio with Yunho and Mingi turned into fear that maybe you had inserted yourself into their friendship. After all, they found themselves together first before you bumped into Yunho and told him how you were alone, effectively guilt-tripping him. The thought of how they have always had your back turned into anxiety that maybe you had leaned on them too much. You relied on them more than you should and now you were a burden to them. The things you told them, should you have told them? Especially the dark ones, the ones that stemmed from your bad mental state. Were you manipulating them without realizing it? Were your promises of the future even really promises? How could you be sure that it wasn't you pressuring your expectations to them?

It had been three days. Were you still alone because they thought you were better off alone? That they too, needed time away from you? Maybe you never needed your own space, maybe it was your subconscious telling you that you needed to give them space from you.

Loud bangs broke the train of thought and the more you came back to reality, the more you recognized the voices.

"Mingi?" you inhaled sharply, seeing the face of one of your lovers on the window as he banged the wall.

Thinking that you were hallucinating, you turned your head away and stood up. There was no way he could be there.

More bangs were heard and when you turned around again, you saw both Mingi who was now with Yunho staring at you from the window.

"(y/n), open up!" Yunho called out.

Normally, you would register his voice as is but your brain, in its unstable state, thought that he was demanding you to let him in. Mingi too, though he was only standing there looking at you, sending knocks on the window as he wanted to hold you once again, your brain took that as him glaring at you and being in fury.

Anxiety shot up and your head shook violently. "N-no..." you whimpered, bottom lip trembling as you took a step back only to trip on a carpet and fall.

The sight of you on the floor caused Mingi and Yunho to abandon all reasons and logic and all they wanted to do was to help you. They started banging and trying to pry the door open, needing to get inside to be there for you but all it did was send you into a deeper spiral without them realizing. Your body curled into a ball while they were yelling for you to open the door. The more you heard them, the worse you felt and before you knew it, you were yelling for them to leave you be, leave you alone, you didn't deserve them.

It wasn't until you started yelling at how you should have never burdened yourself on them that they stopped banging on the door. Their eyes welled with tears hearing the things, untrue things, you hurled at yourself. It hurt them to hear you think so low of yourself like that. You were everything to them, you were something so precious and special and to think that you believe they would be better without you, it was like a serrated knife had been plunged into their hearts multiple times.

"That's not true (y/n), please..." Mingi rested his forehead on the door as his eyes closed slowly, letting tears wet his cheeks, "Please let me in, I... We... (y/n), please," he whimpered.

Looking around, Yunho remembered that the owner of the cabin had told him about a spare key a long time ago. Thinking that it was worth a shot, Yunho was glad to see that there was still a key hidden under the cushion of the porch lounger.

You were too busy bawling to realize that Yunho had opened the door successfully which was a good thing because had you realized, you would have done something stupid like run out into the field in the cold January breeze.

Mingi tried to rush inside only for Yunho to stop him, holding onto his arm as he watched you cry with a broken heart.

"Yunho, wha-"

Wordlessly, Yunho pulled Mingi down to sit in the doorway while maintaining his gaze on you.

Though confused, Mingi followed along, sitting down and looking between Yunho and you.

"We should go in there. She needs us," Mingi said, voice cracking as he shook Yunho slightly, trying to convince him to go inside. He knew he could definitely go inside himself, but for some reason, he felt like he shouldn't.

For once, Yunho didn't give any explanation and just shook his head one more time. Soon, however, his hand took one of Mingi's and they sat there with you with hands linked, waiting for you to... Well, they weren't sure what they were waiting for but they were sure they would understand soon.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You must have passed out from crying because you remembered feeling cold and alone but the moment you came to again, you realized that this time, you were... Warm.

Sitting up, you noticed that the skies outside were dark and when you turned your body around, you saw Yunho and Mingi attending to the fireplace. The cabin was dark save for the illumination provided by the warm fire.

It took a bit of time for your eyes to adjust but when your eyes really focused, you noticed that Mingi was holding onto your favourite blanket that you forgot to bring. How did they even got inside?

For a moment, you only watched them do their thing, comfortably sitting in silence as if enjoying conversation done by the soft crackles of the fireplace.

Mingi felt something on the back of his neck and when he turned his body slightly, he saw that you were staring at him with puffy eyes. His instinct told him to run to you and envelop you in a hug and tell you how worried he was and how much he regretted things that he thought he did. But his better judgement stopped him from making a move forward. Instead, he cracked a gentle smile and ducked his head down, carefully opening your folded blanket as a silent invitation.

Your body moved automatically towards him and before you knew it, you were suddenly sat in between Mingi and Yunho.

While Mingi draped you with your blanket, Yunho made final adjustments on the firewood before he sat down close to you and even moved so that you and he were shoulder-to-shoulder.

You were sure that they were going to ask what happened, what was wrong with you, why you ran away. But minutes passed and all there was was... Silence. You were sure that when you saw them again you'd be anxious because you had to explain yourself but all you felt was a sense of calm. It was rather ridiculous but you could feel the anxiety melting off of your body.

"I'm tired," finally you opened up even though your voice cracked due to how hoarse your throat felt. "I'm so tired," you exhaled as you closed your eyes, your bottom lip trembling once again.

This time, Yunho moved to sidle even closer to you so he could guide your head gently to rest on his chest. "You... Can you find it in your heart... To rest in mine?" Yunho spoke up finally, voice cracking as well. Mingi then moved closer until he was able to wrap his hands around your waist whilst leaning his head on Yunho's strong shoulder, effectively caging you securely between them. "You can rest in our hearts, love," he added, ducking to press a gentle kiss on your shoulder.

Nothing else needed to be said because nothing else should. The three of you had been through so much together in your youth that it felt like you were all alone. But, with the stars as your witness and the fire as your companion, you realized something that was always true. Even lonely, you were always together and your inadequacies made you whole. While pain exists and will always find its way back to remind you of your faults, it allows you to remember who and what you are, but most importantly, what you now have from that.

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet @pirateeznet

taglist :

@kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @surveilenceysystem @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17 @kpoplover718 @haatohwa @x-bluee @erinaimeexx @blackb3ll @mingiholic @angelicyeo @vampcharxter @meowmeowminnie @marvelous-llama @kawennote09 @hongjoong-lovebot @stopeatread

[star-dust-no-name]

°☆I come from the stars☆°

Part 2: A friend or foe?

•PREVIOUS• □NEXT□ ☆MASTERLIST☆

ᯓ✦

Murder drones x child reader (platonic)

Gender neutral reader

Hypothesis: What if child reader came in the landing pod with J,V and N?

ᯓ✦

J was going to be honest

It was incredible hell to take care of a child

Much less a human one as well

The infinite data that she downloaded just to take care of a child was nothing compared to what she had to deal with

Her current predicament?

You wanted food

It wasn’t a matter of where to get the food as they have long since resolved the issue when landing pods of similar shape to that of your landing pod would fly over Copper-9 every 2-3 months and drop crates of food alongside toys for you that would last a while longer before needing more

It was indeed stressing for J having to figure out what to give you, after all she had no one else to help her alongside herself (it’s not like she would ask for help anyways) since V was out hunting worker drones to bring back tonight’s dinner which would probably consist of worker drone limbs and oil and N was out patrolling and raiding any nearby worker drone camps to keep you safe

J snapped out of her thoughts as her vision snapped right back to you

You were currently playing with your teddy bear and a bunny plush that was included in the crates of toys as to distract yourself of food and your everlasting hunger

J sighed in relief but quickly regained her composure again just as quickly, as she started to bring out pans and other ingredients to a makeshift small kitchen in the corner of the landing pod since none of her fellow coworkers were responding to her messages she took it upon herself to at least make you a simple meal which was just some warm alphabet soup a perfect meal for a kid and it beats out the snowy winter climate that was just starting to present itself in Copper-9 a simple meal that killed two birds with one stone as the humans would say

J smirked to herself, proud of her accomplishment as she turned to look at you

Only to find

That there was no child there

…

Don’t panic J…

Just as quickly as J told herself that she bolted outside and began searching everywhere but it proved to be difficult as a rapid snow storm had just begun

“Sh-t…”

She knew it was too dangerous to fly in this weather even with her metal wings of the wonderful technology of JcJenson could not even withstand 1 minute in a Copper-9 snowstorm

With nothing else to do she quickly tried using her own technology any footprint scanners or anything but there was no sign of you as the snow continued pilling itself covering any footprints you might have made

Maybe she didn’t double check inside the pod?

She ran inside again double checking everywhere even tearing down the door to the “bathroom” to look for you

She knew before she teared it down that you weren’t there

After all her built in sensors never failed

Now when it was JC Jenson technology

J was desperate

Maybe that’s why she took a gamble and even with her knowledge of knowing what would happen

She was still going to try

For you

F̷͙̜͍̽̐o̷̙̠͍͚͙̐r̸̘̺͑͆̓̌̎̒ ̶̢̏̃̾͘ť̸̜͉̥̺̫̖̒̆̌͠h̸̥̻̗̰̥́̉́̈́e̵̗̟̜̠̓̐́̑ ̸̨̪̺͂̅͆͑̌c̶̻̫̬̺͚͑̓̇ͅo̵̡̱̣͖͕̖͒̀m̴̹̞̭̍̂̈́ͅp̷̯̮̳͔͑̍̄a̶̧̢̞͇̭̜̓ň̴̢̝̑̍y̸͖̖͐̉̈́̔̀̈́

F̴͖͋́î̴̙͇̩͓̫̒͐̉n̶̗̩̆ͅḓ̶͇̞̎̄̅̀͜ͅ ̴̨̧̣̲̖́͒͝͝t̷͆̽̈́̔͊ͅh̴̛̬̟̲̤̤́̈́̈́e̸͙̥̘̙͍̤͛̂̂̉͝m̶̧̛͉͍̩̜͌̆̋ͅ ̵͓̮̀̈͝J̷̢̜̽̀͜

Y̶̧͖̞͇̜̓̄̑o̴̡̥̖̞͌͒̏͒͗̚ṳ̷̙̪̖͚̘̾ ̶̬̜͖̯̼̿̈́̑̃̓k̵̫͈̦̍̔̍̕n̷̲̹͚̼̩̅̓̕ͅõ̴̬̎̌̅w̵̺̘͔͑́̀ ̵̣͈̀̒͑̇w̶̢̼̖̩̿̅̉͑ͅh̶̢̟̖̎͛͑́̌͝a̶͖̺̱͎͇̋ţ̴͍̟̩͛̈̄ ̸̟̱̑̈̍̓̆͘h̶͖̲̞̗̗͕͝a̵͕̰͈͠p̵̬̼̘̉̇̋͘͜p̶̡̡̺͉͒͂͗͠e̴̹̍̚n̴̬͉͈͒̂̅s̶̝̙͛ ̴͎͉͔͑̈ỉ̷̛͇̹̲̏͠f̵̣͔̹̮̘͎̈́ ̴̥͐͜y̶̧̝̜̍̄o̶̯͉͌͑̽ǘ̵̫̀ ̷̝͇̳͋͐͋f̴̧̱̂̄ä̸́͆̚͜į̷͋̈́́͜l̷͉̱̘̻̩̜͐̕̚

Ý̴̖͇͔͂̚͠͝O̸͚͔̍͑̏ͅU̷̞̣͚͎͕͓̅͂̀̃̕̕ ̵̨̠̜̱͈̱̒͆̚Ċ̴͚̱A̷̬͈̗̙͕̜͊̇̽̓̀͘N̵̼̫̝̳͌͑͑̀͝T̴̝͍̼̯̣͆̃̕ ̴̘̻̝͒͛̃͝F̴̤̈͂̒̿̄͘Ã̶̳̳̠͇͔̳̿̄͑Ḯ̴̺̖̖͙͎͉L̵͇̾̂̽̈́ ̷̢̥̱̹̟̀̄͛͋T̷̛̳̦̪͙̑H̴͓̫̠̻̀́̿̚E̴̛͔͙̲̖̟̘͐̏͠ ̵̢̨͕̺̏̿͘͘ͅC̸͙̘͉͎̲̞̿̄O̷̜̓M̶̠̲͍͆́̍̍́P̸̜̰̖̤̅ͅȦ̶͕͎͍̇͋Ņ̸̡͉̹̊ͅY̵̩͔͉̤̌́̃̿̇ ̵̻̭͚̝̠̒͑̃̍́

O̵̡̖͕̱̳̙͂̒̓̒͝B̶͚̲͋̏Ę̴͊̕͝͝Ȳ̶͍̈́̀͗̌͊ ̷̭̮̻̩͉̑̈́̑̏͛͆M̶̛̱̮̭̖̄̽Ě̵̝͖̣͊̒̃̕

She HAD to find you

So she flew up into the storm

ᯓ✦

Ó̵̖̌v̴̓��e̸̝̙̩̎ř̶͍͎͛͜ ̸̙͒̉h̴̭̼̬̒̑e̸̝͆͑r̵̳̊ė̶͜ ̷̤͙́k̶̢͔̯͑ḯ̵̤̹̚͜͠d̶͉̥̳͋̚

J̶̢͛̐̿ű̷̝͕͚s̴͕̘͛̆t̴̺͕͐̃ ̵̩̟̔f̷͚̼͑͝ọ̶̜̏̕l̷̥̉̚l̸͍͎̗͆̈́̅o̶͖͜͝ẃ̴̗̟ ̷̨̔m̶̼͓̺̎̌y̴̫̒͆ ̴̜͉͍̓̚͘v̷̱̾̽o̸͔͝ǐ̶̧c̷̢͎̖̋́ę̵̭̂̔̍ ̶̨̜̹͐̎

I̵̱̎͋̆ ̷͖́̈́̑ẇ̵̙͎̜̏̋á̴̐ͅn̴͕͔̑͝t̷̞̀̀͛ ̵̱͒y̶̭͆̒ó̸̤͖̻̔̾u̸̗̩͋̿ͅ ̵͇̚ͅt̶͖̋͆ö̸̖̠ ̵̱̺͝m̸��͎̮ḛ̶̗̯͝ĕ̵̝́ṯ̷̃ ̸̩̜͕̈̓͊s̴͍̐̔o̴̮̼̅m̸̹͓͆͆͠ë̶̛̠́ó̶̧̈́ņ̸͕̯̄͝e̸̗͘ ̸̰̗̿s̴̺̑̐̌p̶͔͉̱͂͑͘ȩ̶̯̈́̓͝c̵̞͔̫̽͛i̸̳̺̒ä̵̬̼́͒l̶̟̟̮͆

Š̶̛̼ò̶͍̓́m̵̘̐̚è̷̞͑ǒ̴̐̚͜n̸̡̄̿͝ẻ̴͎͈̲ ̴͖̈w̷̹͓͒ͅḩ̸̽̇̈o̸̘͕̹͂̿̈́ ̷͈̬̯̽͌͒w̶͖̥͔͗̉̏ḯ̵̞l̴̪͐̔̀l̵̹̯͖̀͊ ̸̢̨̳͊͗̚h̵̢͔̃ẽ̶̥͎͓ļ̵̀̑͠p̷̪̬̓̏̓ ̸̩͈̺̽͌̈́m̵̰̅͘e̶̱̻̻̋͌ ̵̜̓͂͆ḭ̶̅̾̅n̶͎͝ ̴̯̱̿̌ț̵̄ḧ̸̥̫e̸̝̿ ̷̳̈́̅͑f̶̳̿̑u̷̪̞͑̆t̸̺̙̏̔u̸͍̥̖̓r̶̦̭̓e̴̞͛̈́͋ ̷̦̉̓

T̶͇̎͆̒h̶̟̰͐e̶̮̣͌y̷̫̆̇’̵̼̙̤͆̆͘r̵̬̚e̴̗͆͆ ̷̪͕̤̎ā̷͉̬ ̶̧̯̿͜f̸̤̕r̸̢͇͗ï̷͔͓̔é̶̹ṇ̷̢̳̔͋d̸͚͙̭̓͝ ̴̻̾͛ö̴̫́̈́̚f̸̡̤̪͛̄̄ ̷̩̪̄̆̐m̷̫̋̓̽i̶̯̠̔̏̀ṋ̸̪͚̀̔ȩ̸͑

W̷͖̲͌̆̀ḥ̷͆̾͠í̶̼̆c̵͚͚̈́̋ẖ̴̺̈́́̚ ̶͉̺̈́̈m̷̧̰̰̚e̷̜͒́ä̶̟̝̝̎͝ǹ̷͍̝̥s̶͎̹͔̆̊́ ̷̝͛̏t̷͚̽h̵̯̍e̶̺̞̾̓ͅy̵̨͘’̴̮͖͆͑͠r̶̮̅e̸̢̩͊̈́ ̵͖̺̈́̄͂a̶͕̎̾͊ ̶̝̜̈f̴̡̱̂̈̐r̴̬̹͎̈́i̶̛̹ę̵̮̇n̸̠̈́͊̏ḑ̷̓̾̆ ̸̮̄̚͠o̸̲̝͐̈́͘f̷͓͑̂ ̷̲̕͝ỵ̵̛̗́ͅö̴̟́͠ų̷̥͋̈́͆r̵͙̘̿s̸̄ͅ

Y̴̘͉̿͋͗ơ̵̡̩̭̿͐ṷ̸͚͚͒ ̵̯̔̔̈D̷̗̚͠O̴̼͐ ̸͔̣̏͜w̵̳̒a̷̹͌̍n̸͈͔͒͐͘t̶̥̙̚ ̴̖̑͂̎t̴̮̗̬͆ö̶̟̦͎̾ ̶̘͆h̴̰͕͗ḕ̵̲l̷̲̉ṕ̸͚̣̳̅͑ ̵̭͘ͅm̴͓͆͊̈e̸̟̓̓͗,̴͚͊͜ ̶͕̅̽r̴̨̳͕̿̐̂i̴̫̔̍ͅg̵̬̅h̶̙̟̀͠͝t̸̳̞̊̎͊?

You nodded even though the voice in your head probably couldn’t see it

You weren’t sure why that voice was talking to you

It started a few days ago when that voice would talk to you

Eventually you called them a friend since they would always appear when you were bored with no “family” to play with

Eventually when J was making you food your friend had a brilliant idea

Į̴̕ ̸̡̍k̷̳̉n̵̡͝ö̵̤́ẉ̶͒ ̸̤̒ȏ̴̪f̸̼́ ̵͎̔ș̷͊o̵͖̎m̴̱̉ė̶͉o̸͙̾n̷̗̊e̵̢͐ ̶̯̔w̸͇̃ḧ̶̼o̶̬̚ ̶̱͠c̷͚̈́ỏ̶̰ů̶̜l̷̤̓d̷̢̈́ ̶̼̑ả̵͍c̸͎̀t̵̮͂u̴̬͝ạ̶̓l̵̫͂l̵͈̐y̷̭͝ ̴̭͐p̴̙͠l̸̖̚à̴̝y̴̻̎ ̷͉̈́w̶͕͘ȉ̴̼t̷̳̔h̵̯̕ ̸̼̌y̶̡̎ỏ̸̤u̸͓̔ ̶̳͆a̵̫̓l̷̘̀l̷̫̈́ ̶͕̊ỳ̴͓o̵͚̔ủ̶͉ ̷̢͂h̸͚̎à̶̞v̴̹͛ḛ̸͂ ̴̜͋t̷̘̀ŏ̴̺ ̵̖͗ḑ̸͗o̴̻̍ ̴͒ͅi̶̖̚š̵̖ ̷̜́f̷̖͋ò̸̩l̸̤̈l̵̮̆ỏ̶̟w̷̘͘ ̵̖̇m̷̦̀y̶͍͗ ̸̝̉v̷̟̔o̸͈̊ḯ̸͉c̴̠̈́e̷̟̊ ̷̳͋ạ̴͒n̶̼̅d̵̖̓ ̶͙͒d̷͖̕i̴͋ͅr̸̮̽e̷̱̕c̷̃͜t̵̳́i̸͕̓ò̷͎n̴̙̄ṣ̸͗

T̸͐͜h̴͖̏ẹ̸̐y̶͔̒’̵͍̓ṟ̵̾e̸͙̔ ̵̥̓f̸͚̿ủ̷̯n̶͖͒,̸̩̏ ̵̡̾I̶͈͝ ̵̺̌p̷̣̑r̷̲̾o̵̬̚m̶̤͘i̷͔̿s̴̡̿e̵̖͆

T̶̻̾h̶̦͗e̶͍͒y̶͇̋’̶̰̑v̴̙͌ȅ̶̜ ̶͚̇b̸̮͗e̶̡̚e̴͑ͅṉ̴̓ ̶̜̅å̸̘ ̶̘̔f̵͖̄r̸̘͘i̸͍̾è̴̲n̶̦̔d̵͚̈́ ̸̞̓o̵̡̍f̸̩̍ ̴͔̋m̷̢̍i̶̧̎n̷̠̓e̴̞̎ ̸̭͊f̶̓ͅo̵͔͒r̷͗ͅ ̵̢̽Ỷ̵̩Ȩ̸̇A̸̳͝R̸̲̅S̸̨̄

You aren’t sure why you obeyed the voice

But

It was like something was edging you ṫ̴͙o̸͇̊ ̶͕͒f̸̕ͅo̶̥͂l̸̺̿l̵̺͘o̷̖̚w̶͇̓ ̶͇͆i̸̗̾t̴̪̀

To l̷͇̉i̸̩͠s̸͇͊t̶̝͒ë̶̟́ṋ̴́ ̸̨͒t̴̞̏ỏ̴̳ ̵̰͐î̶̗t̷͉̓

To o̵̯͑b̸͔̕e̸̡̛y̸̛̰

Ŏ̵̳B̷̟̊E̶͔̎Y̵͍̿ ̵̝̓Ḿ̵͈Y̷̰͆ ̴̘͗V̷̳́O̷̩̔I̵̱͒C̵͇͋Ë̸̘́

…

W̴̤̋Ë̶͚́ ̵̲͑A̵̫͋R̸̤̕Ë̷̬́ ̶̱́Ḩ̸̀E̴̤͂R̷̞̎E̶͍͊ ̵͉̓F̸̲̈R̶͖͋Í̸̙Ẽ̶̫N̶̩͠D̷͇̑:̴̤̅)̴͇͝

Your friend said as you looked up

You ended up outside a weird wall

Huh

Maybe your friend got the wrong directions?

It was getting cold…

Silly you

You forgot to bring a sweater

Why didn’t you remember to bring one?

Maybe it was because of your friend after all you were so focused on their voice

It was like their voice was mesmerizing you

Making you forget the most obvious things

Are they really your fri-

Ǐ̵̲G̴̨̉Ņ̶̊O̸͔͝R̵̥̍Ẻ̴̙ ̵̭̇T̷̟͑Ḫ̶̽O̷̪͝S̴̞͋E̷̺̾ ̵̪͑T̷̗͋H̷̦̚O̴̥̽U̷̙̇Ǵ̵̗Ḧ̵͇́T̸͍͗S̷̟͐

F̷̞͑Ȯ̶̻L̷̢̛L̷̘͝O̶̝͘W̷̛̰ ̸̗̈́Ṁ̷͕Y̷̙̊ ̷̲͊V̶̞̍Ǒ̴͎I̴̗͆C̸̻̐Ę̴̓

T̵͈̕Ȑ̴͚Ǔ̸̺S̵̼̾T̵̘̄ ̴̡͋M̷̼̂E̸͍͊

I̸̛̯M̶̧͛ ̴͉̀Y̷̳͆Ơ̵̩Û̴͎Ṟ̸̄ ̴̦̒F̸̺͐R̴̳̕I̵̭̊E̴̺͝N̷̢͝D̶̥͌

Ḟ̶̥R̴͖̓Ȋ̸̖E̷̙͐N̷̘̿D̵͍͘Ś̶͇ ̸͍̌H̷͔̽Ë̸͎́L̸͖̐P̵̣͗ ̴̳͘E̷͚͊Ä̴͇C̵̤̈H̴̪̆O̵̦͗T̷̜͛H̷̙̀Ē̵̢R̶͍̔

I̴̓ͅ ̵͎̑O̸̥͝N̷͖͗L̸̻̀Y̷̳͐ ̶̦̂Ẅ̸̩́A̵̬͘Ṋ̷̓T̵̯̐ ̶̲̌Ṱ̸̋O̴̗͛ ̶̂ͅH̴̻͠E̷̬̋L̸̖̿P̵͚͐ ̸̞̉Ỹ̶̙O̵͇͝Ủ̴͙

Y̵̛ͅO̶̯̕U̸͉̓ ̵̢̄W̸͔͠Ą̸͠N̵̒ͅT̸̺̂ ̵̘̇M̶͍̀O̸̫͑R̶̯͘Ẽ̵̟ ̸̤̕F̸̲̒R̸̳͊I̸̳͝Ê̴̘N̷̫͘D̶͈̎S̵̹̊,̴̻͑ ̵̱̈R̶̟̅I̷̬͊G̷͖͘H̶̱̑T̸͖̈́?̵̹̄

I̸̳͑M̴͔̓ ̴̟̕Ō̴̱N̴̰͒Ĺ̷̳Y̷̦̒ ̷̖̀T̸̞̂R̷͓̿Y̴̘͌Ȋ̷̖Ṅ̸̝G̵͔̈ ̶̦̈́Ṫ̷̜Ȏ̶̬ ̶̞͒H̷̘̽Ě̵͖L̵͔̆P̵̰̌ ̵̭̊Y̷̺̏-̸̧͝

*CRACK*

The weird door opened

And closed

Your friend stopped talking

And there you were

Face to face with a drone that had similar features to that of your “family”

Instead they were a lot shorter

And had purple eyes and hair?

Huh

You never knew that disassembly drones could have different color other than yellow

You smiled happily

This must be the friend that your friend was talking about!!

Oh how you looked up and smiled

Only to be met with a look of shocked mixed with a little bit of disgust

Huh?

Why were they looking at you like that?

Weird feeling

You don’t like this feeling

…

They had a gun behind their back

You just noticed that

It was then that they pointed it at you

“WHO ARE YOU?”

“MATTER OF FACT WHAT ARE YOU?”

You blinked nervously

Wow

Your friend friend was weird

Maybe you should rephrase that

The strange voice in your head’s friend is weird

You smiled at them as you reached your hand out in a handshake (N had told you that manners are important)

“My name is [name] you must be the friend that my voice friend has been talking about nice to meet you!”

“I uhm…hi?”

She nervously took your hand in a handshake

“I suppose you aren’t dangerous which is weird especially for your kind”

She lowered the gun

“So…what’s your name?”

“Oh well my name is U-”

*CRASH*

“[NAME] GET AWAY FROM THEM THEYRE DANGEROUS”

J said not very calmly her wings had been cut and broken slightly with very noticeable damage done to it

Oh yeah there was a storm

You forgot about that

Maybe it was because you were standing under a roof

Hey and come to think about it you don’t feel cold anymore!

Why are your hands blue?

You still smiled at J

“Don’t worry J they’re a friend they even pointed a gun at me!”

You sounded so excited

The drone behind you snapped back to reality at the realization of the situation

You aren’t an ordinary human

You were with them

The very kind that terrorized her kind

How are you so oblivious to everything going on around you?

That was her thought

Her second was to run away

So she ran

Your smiled faltered as your friend ran away with your mother running after her

*CLANK*

You turned to your side and there was N

“Hey come over here kiddo J called me and told me to come get you”

He smiled at you as he walked over to you wrapping a warm blanket over you

“Where have you’ve been? Kiddo you got hyperthermia you forgot your sweater, come let’s go back home you even forgot your alphabet soup at home and you love that stuff”

He said it all with a warm smile as you slept in his chest as he took you home gliding against the storm

All to distract you from the situation you made

ᯓ✦

V was tapping her food anxiously and impatiently against the cold hard metal floor of the landing pod

She had fixed the door and reheated your soup after she received a emergency text from J

She was now awaiting N

N crashed against the floor on his back you were wrapped in a blanket against his chest protected

“F-cking finally, I want this all to be over and this stupid storm to end soon, do you know how close I was to setting fire to the nearby camp? WE COULD GAVE GOTTEN GOOD FOOD”

“V pls shh they’re sleeping” N said with a shushing motion to his mouth as he stood up and layed you down on the couch nearby

*CRASH*

“F-UCK” J said as she crashed down her screen had been shattered with what seemed like an electric bullet

“What’s wrong with you?”

V said as she looked at J a look of worry was quickly turned into a look of annoyance

“J they’re sleeping, seriously you guys need to be more quiet”

N said with more urgency

J looked at V with a look that spoke it all

V blinked in a look of shock as she quickly turned to N

“N…you remember how we told you recently about the mansion?”

“Here? Right now? The kid might hear”

“They won’t hear anything not when they’re sleeping”

You opened you eyes drooping with sleep

“J did it_____installed____”

“Really? To who?”

“No__s kid”

“I thought she _________”

“Apparently she had enough time after she escaped the ____________ to make a kid”

“Contact them”

“You mean?”

“___”

Your eyes drifted to sleep once again

Maybe next time your family can meet your friend U next time

ᯓ✦

A/N: Guess who’s back? It’s your favorite procrastinator author!!!! Chaos is coming

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Backstage Story Translation - Chikage Utsuki SR: Hide the REVERSE - Part 2

this is a request by taruchikas, who also provided a video of the story! tysm!

Chikage: —— Ah.

Izumi: Hm?

Chikage: Found it.

Kamekichi: Really!?

Sakuya: Thank goodness… You found it pretty easily.

Izumi: Oh, there’s a dog on this side.

Chikage: Yeah, this is a space dog named Laika…

Sakuya: …

Sakuya: Um… Is this really the coin you were using before?

Chikage: ——

Sakuya: I remember the coin you usually use having a scratch on it…

Chikage: … Nice memory.

Chikage: You’re right. This is just a spare.

Chikage: The other coin will be hard to find in the dark, and should the worst come to pass, I’ve got this one.

Chikage: There’s no point in dwelling on it now, so let’s call it a day.

Kamekichi: You sure…?

Sakuya: …

Chikage: You don’t need to worry about it. Really.

Chikage: Sakuya, Director, thank you both for helping me look for it. Kamekichi, reflect on your actions. Let’s break it up now.

Izumi: (Is he really okay with this…?)

-

Sakuya: I’ll look in the flower beds again. Kamekichi, you should go look on top of that tree.

Kamekichi: Roger! Leave it to me!

Chikage: …

Izumi: Good morning, Chikage-san.

Chikage: … Director-san, good morning.

Izumi: Sakuya-kun and Kamekichi have already started searching again.

Sakuya: Oh, Chikage-san, Director, good morning!

Chikage: There you are, even though I said you don’t need to worry about it.

Sakuya: You did, but you carry this coin with you all the time…

Sakuya: It may not be anything of importance, but I figured you might be attached to it.

Sakuya: And I’m attached to it too, because I’ve seen this coin almost every day ever since I met you.

Sakuya: Even if you’re not attached to it, it’s a special coin to me.

Chikage: Attached… That might be it.

Chikage: Then, can I ask you to help me look for it again?

Sakuya: Of course!

-

Izumi: It’s nowhere to be found…

Sakuya: Ah–

Sakuya: Or not…! Searching is easier now than it was last night, but it’s still hard to find it…

Kamekichi: — Ah! Something’s glittering over there!

Sakuya: Huh? Where?

Kamekichi: Over there! In the corner of the garden!

Sakuya: You mean there…?

Sakuya: …! There it is!

Izumi: Ah, you’re right, it has a scratch!

Chikage: Thanks. I didn’t think we’d find it.

Kamekichi: I’m so glad we found it! I had almost prepared myself to get grilled on a skewer!

Chikage: Now you’re just exaggerating.

Sakuya: Um… How did it get this scratch?

Chikage: … Do you want to know?

Sakuya: Yes!

Chikage: … When I was a kid, I wanted a commemorative medal from the museum so badly that I waited in line for hours to get one.

Chikage: But I was worried I’d drop it, so I asked the museum’s security guard at the entrance to hold on to it until the tour was over.

Chikage: Looking back, that was a pretty selfish request. But the security guard was happy to oblige.

Chikage: When I returned some time later, after the tour was over, there was a commotion at the entrance.

Chikage: The security guard I had spoken to was involved, and I jumped in to help without thinking.

Chikage: And that’s when I realized… he was confronting a robber.

Sakuya: A robber!?

Kamekichi: That’s not good!

Chikage: Before I could tell what was happening, the robber was in front of me. He started mercilessly coming at me with a knife.

Chikage: The security guard immediately got in front of me, and the robber stabbed him in the chest—!

Sakuya: Oh no…

Kamekichi: Dear god!

Chikage: … But he ended up alright, somehow.

Chikage: Why do you think?

Sakuya: Huh? Why did he…?

Kamekichi: Don’t tell me, he was actually immortal…!?

Chikage: He had the coin I entrusted to him in his uniform’s breast pocket.

Chikage: The knife’s tip hit the coin and got stuck there.

Chikage: The robber was then arrested by the police, who rushed to the scene, and the issue was resolved.

Chikage: Then, the security guard handed me the coin, smiled, and said…

Chikage: “I charged it with good luck for you.”

Sakuya: How cool…! Almost like it’s right out of a movie…!!

Kamekichi: I’m so moved!!

Izumi: (... I’m pretty sure only half of that story is real.)

-

Izumi: Ah, Chikage-san. Are you off to work?

Chikage: Yeah. I’ve been busy all morning.

Izumi: Fufu, we did have a pretty hectic morning.

Chikage: You can say that again.

Option 1: Still, I’m glad we could find it.

Izumi: Still, I’m glad we could find it.

Chikage: Yeah… Me too.

Chikage: I’ll take care not to misplace it again.

Izumi: You should. Or else Kamekichi will take it again.

Chikage: … I’ll grill him for real if he does it again.

Izumi: It doesn’t sound like a joke when you say it, Chikage-san, so please cut it out…

Option 2: By the way, was that story true?

Izumi: … By the way, was that story true?

Chikage: The story about the museum, you mean?

Izumi: Yes. I kind of doubt something so movie-like could happen…

Chikage: Sakuya and Kamekichi’s reactions were so interesting that I might have exaggerated a little.

Chikage: But well, it really is a meaningful coin… We can leave it at that.

Izumi: (Why does it feel like he’s trying to dodge the question…)

Izumi: (Well, I’m just glad he found the coin.)

Izumi: Oh. Can we have a coin battle?

Chikage: Now?

Izumi: Yes. Except this time, instead of guessing left and right, I’d like to try guessing whether it’s head or tails.

Chikage: … Alright.

[Chikage flips the coin]

Chikage: Here. Heads or tails?

Izumi: Hmm…

Izumi: (I tried to change the type of battle, but… I still have no idea…!)

Izumi: (... Uh, I don’t even know which is heads and which is tails for that coin…)

Izumi: (I suggested this, but I don’t even know that part…)

Chikage: —Sorry, It’s heads.

Izumi: (F-For now, I’ll—)

Izumi: … Tails!

Izumi: … I thought that was tails, though.

Izumi: Wouldn’t I be the winner then?

Izumi: (I-I’m sounding a little too desperate here…)

Chikage: … Pffft, hahaha.

Chikage: … Alright, you win.

part 1 | part 2

[writingmyheartsout]

Nobody's Soldier - a Bucky Barnes story.

(bonus chapter )

_____________

Another apology is needed I guess, as I made a promise but I didn't kept it, kinda. In my defence, I had to take care of a few things in real life (my dog wasn't feeling well) and online as I manage an edit account on TikTok as well .

But anyway, like I said before, this is a bonus chapter, something I wanted to write that adds some depth to the story (I rewatched the series as well to take some inspiration for this). It's not really necessary to read it, since it's Bucky and Doctor Raynor talking, but it's worthy :)

_____________

This fic is cross-posted on wattpad and Ao3

Nobody's Soldier playlist on Spotify

CW: talking about trauma, PTSD, Bucky being insecure and emotional, trauma, light mention of past trauma, therapy session, denial, just Bucky and his therapist talking, limerence, resolving past issues, acceptance, worthy of love and affection, guilt, winter soldier mentioned.

(chapter is roughly 2k long, so it's a short one)

chapter 1 is here

chapter 2 is here

_____________

Bonus - a therapy session with Doctor Raynor

As each day passed, Bucky grew increasingly frustrated by the lack of response from you. He had been doing better when he was able to talk to you, but now? Now it was bad all over again, worse even.

He even started sleeping on the floor again, just like he used to, instead of the bed. His mind was once again filled with memories and images that he certainly didn’t wish to remember. At least not now.

However, he kept his promise and began to work even harder in therapy, both with Doctor Raynor and in the support group he attended.

He longed to reach out to you, to hear your voice or read your words, but he had promised you that he would wait.

And after long, dreadful months of waiting, he finally had one of his last therapy sessions about what happened.

He sat in the chair across from her, frustration and impatience evident on his face. Doctor Raynor observed him silently for a few moments before finally speaking up.

“You look… irritated, James,” she commented, her tone deadpan as always.

Bucky just scowled at her observation.

“You could say that…” he muttered, his voice low and laced with a hint of annoyance.

The doctor raised an eyebrow at his response.

“Any particular reason for that irritation?” she asked, her tone calm, with a touch of curiosity.

Bucky let out an exasperated sigh at that.

“I just… I haven’t heard from her in over a month..” he admitted, his voice betraying his true feelings.

Doctor Raynor tilted her head slightly, studying his expression.

“Ah, I see…the limerence” she replied, leaning back in her seat and crossing her arms on her chest as she regarded him with a calmness that he found rather frustrating.

Bucky’s scowl deepened as he acknowledged the truth again.

“Yeah… that’s what you called it, right…?” he said, the word still leaving a bitter taste in his mouth.

The doctor nodded, her expression still impassive.

“Yes, as I told you it’s a term used to describe an intense, obsessive attraction to someone that isn’t based on reality” She paused for a moment, studying his expression to gauge his reaction.

Bucky gave another resigned sigh, running a hand through his hair nervously.

“I know, I know, …it’s not real. It’s just, I can’t help it…” he clenched his jaw, silently cursing himself again for his lack of self-control.

“Alright, give me a break, I’m trying ok?” he added almost too quickly. ”... I didn’t have a moment to deal with what happened, y’know? A moment to breathe…”

Doctor Raynor let out a soft hum, tapping her pen against her notebook.

“It’s understandable that you’re experiencing these feelings. It’s normal for someone in your situation to crave contact with people who can understand you…” she paused for a moment, clearly considering her next words.

Bucky leaned forward in his seat, listening intently.

He desperately wanted her to give him some kind of advice, something that could help ease the ache in his chest. It felt like he was missing a part of himself, and it hurt.

Then the doctor continued, her voice gentle yet firm.

“However, it’s important for you to remember that addictions aren’t healthy. It’s no good for you to believe you need something or someone to be okay” she added, as she looked at him, studying his expressions changing as she waited for him to reply.

Bucky knew she was right, but that didn’t make it any easier to accept how he felt.

“I know that...” he muttered through clenched teeth. "I know it’s not good but I… I can’t just turn off these feelings like flipping a damn switch.”

Doctor Raynor nodded, a hint of sympathy in her expression.

“I understand it’s not something you can control easily, but that’s why you’re here.” she paused, allowing her words to sink in. ”...To learn how to handle them in a healthy way. The first step is to understand what’s real and what’s not.”

Bucky exhaled slowly, trying to compose himself after the doctor’s words. 

“I know I’m just obsessed, or at least part of me is, but it feels so real, it feels like it’s the only thing that matters.” He raked his hand through his hair once again, frustration evident in his every movement.

The doctor leaned forward slightly, her voice gentle as she addressed his confession.

“What I’m trying to say is that it’s okay to have these feelings, but it’s not ok to act on them in a way that could hurt yourself or others.” 

Bucky gritted his teeth, both his hands clenched into fists in his lap.

He understood she was right, at least rationally, but the knowledge alone did nothing to soothe the emotional turmoil within him.

“I know, I promised not to act on those… until…” he whispered, looking down for a moment.”…until I get better.”

Doctor Raynor observed him in silence, noticing the effort he was making to keep his emotions in check.

“That’s good…” she said quietly. ”...but it’s also important to remember you’re not alone in this. Others have faced what you’re going through and have overcome it.”

Bucky let out a bitter scoff, disbelief evident on his face as he looked up again.

“And how exactly am I supposed to do that? Just stop thinking and magically get over her?” he leaned back in his seat then, crossing his arms over his chest in a defensive manner.

The doctor smiled patiently at his reaction, undeterred by his defensive attitude.

“No, it’s not that simple, It’s a process that takes time and effort, and you’re only halfway there.” She said, pausing for just a moment ”…but to get to the root of the problem, have you asked yourself why you feel this strongly about this person?” she asked.

Bucky’s expression darkened at her question, his jaw clenching again.

“I… I don’t know…I mean, maybe...” he grumbled, avoiding her gaze once again. "She’s just not afraid of me, she doesn’t see me as some kind of monster. She makes me feel like I matter...”

At that, the doctor nodded, a hint of a smile appearing on her lips..

“So in a way, this person gives you a sense of normalcy? Something you lack in other aspects of your life,” she stated, more as a clarification than a question.”...and because of that, you can’t stop thinking about her?“

Bucky nodded, his voice low and rough as he spoke again.

“Yeah… yeah I think so. She doesn’t see me like everyone else does. And when I think about her… it feels like I can breathe again” he let out a humourless chuckle at his own words, his expression a bitter mix of frustration and longing.

“I know it’s stupid but I… it’s like a drug I can’t quit.”

The smile on the doctor’s face was now gentler, her eyes filled with both sympathy and understanding.

“It’s not stupid, James. Your feelings are valid, however, it doesn’t have to consume your entire life.” she paused, leaning back in her seat again and observing him thoughtfully before speaking again. ”...but allow me to ask you something, will you?”

Bucky let out a sigh at that, visibly tensing once again.

“Sure” he muttered, his voice sounding a bit more defensive. He was listening, but he couldn’t help the overwhelming need he felt deep in his chest.

Doctor Raynor nodded in response.

“Have you ever thought about why she doesn’t see you the same way everyone else does? Why she sees the real you and not the monster, as you said?” she asked, allowing him to fully understand her question. ”...What do you think the answer to that is?”

“I… I don’t know,” he answered after a moment, frustration lacing his voice. ”...maybe she’s just that different?” he paused, his expression darkening as a thought crossed his mind.

“Or maybe she’s just a goddamn stubborn idiot...” he grumbled, mostly to himself.

The doctor only smiled slightly at his muttered insult.

“Maybe she’s all of those things,” she replied calmly. ”...but what if there’s something else?”

She leaned forward, her eyes fixed on his.

“What if you’re the one seeing yourself as a monster, and not her? What if you’re the one putting a label on yourself first, and she’s just seeing through it?”

Bucky’s expression darkened at her words, his jaw clenching again.

“I am the Winter Soldier” he stated firmly, his voice laced with anger. ”...that’s who I was for decades. I killed people, I destroyed families, I ruined lives. How can someone see me as anything else?”

At that, Doctor Raynor sighed gently, her eyes never leaving his.

“That’s who you were, not who you are, we discussed that long ago...” she pointed out quietly.”...you’re not that person anymore, you’re James Buchanan Barnes..”

She paused, letting her words sink in before continuing.

“But you’re holding onto that part, letting it define you. Maybe she sees beyond that, beyond the label. Maybe she sees a person who’s trying to change, maybe she sees the real you.”

“I want to believe that..” he muttered, his voice low and filled with something between doubt and hope. ”...but how can I? How can I believe I'm worthy of that kind of… acceptance?”

Doctor Raynor smiled at that question, her expression conveying both understanding and empathy.

“It’s never about worthiness, James,” she responded gently but firmly. ”...you’re worthy just as you are. You don’t have to make up for your past deeds or actions”

She looked at him squarely in the eyes as she said that.

“The real question is, are you ready to accept that? To let her see the real you? The person behind the mask and the guilt?”

Bucky felt a lump rise in his throat as he listened to her words, his heart clenching in his chest.

“I want to..” he mumbled, his voice betraying his uncertainty.”...but if I screw up? What if I hurt her?”

Doctor Raynor nodded in understanding, her expression still patient and kind.

“That’s actually a good thing..” she admitted gently. ”... that means you care, that you’re willing to take a risk for this person.”

As Bucky almost scoffed, she continued.

“You’re not the same as you were before, you’ve grown, you’ve changed. You know yourself better now. That’s what you need to show her.”

He closed his eyes and let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding.

“I don’t even know if she wants to see me or hear from me..” he said, his voice tinged with pain at the memory. ”...last time, well… I don’t think I left her with a good impression.”

He let out another humourless chuckle as he opened his eyes, his expression hardening.

“She probably thinks I’m a lunatic.”

The doctor chuckled gently, fully expecting a self-deprecating comment from him.

“I highly doubt that..” she reassured him, a hint of amusement in her tone. ”…and if she does, then she’s not the right person for you.”

She paused before adding,

“But you won’t know that until you talk to her.”

Bucky exhaled deeply, rubbing his hands over his face in frustration.

“I know, you’re right..” he said, his voice still bitter. ”...but it’s not that simple, I promised I’d wait…and..”

At that point, Dr. Raynor interrupted him, her gaze firm.

“You’re a man of honour, James, I respect that…but..” she stated, her voice still understanding. ”...sometimes you have to think of yourself too. Holding onto this promise while it’s eats you up inside isn’t healthy either.”

She paused for a moment before continuing.

“Maybe it’s time to have an open and honest conversation with her about how you’re feeling.”

At that suggestion, Bucky let out a bitter scoff, shaking his head in disbelief.

“You don’t have to keep living in the shadows. You deserve a chance at happiness, and if she’s the one who can give you that, then why not try?” the doctor added when she saw his reaction.

He exhaled shakily, closing his eyes for a moment, before looking up at the doctor again.

“What if I can’t be the person she deserves? Why the hell would she want a broken shell of a man like me?”

Doctor Raynor’s expression softened at that, her voice gentle now.

“Since when do people choose who to love based on logic?” she asked, a bemused smile on her face. ”...sometimes people fall for someone despite their flaws, just because they see something beyond them.”

Her expression turned serious once more.

“And you’re far from a broken shell of a man. You’ve been through hell and back. You’re a survivor, a fighter.”  

Her words, along with the explanations she was giving him, echoed in his mind the more she talked.

Should he really try to call you again? Text you first, maybe? He didn’t know.

What if you didn’t even remember him?

He guessed he only had to try.

_____________

[daddy-ul]

let me second that anon and say I too would very much appreciate any and all analysis of their friendship and James POV specifically. that 95 interview where he talks about Lars being the keeper of the secrets lives in my mind rent-free

i take this as a free rant card fhkdfhkdsdf not my fault.

let's talk about mr james trust issue hetfield, starting from 90s tallica (which. 👀👀👀 every time i talk abt it to my non tallica friends they are like "wh what the fuck?" and that's the only sane response)

when I think abt the codependency twins and secrets I usually think about this James interview from Rolling Stones 93

"There's little whispers and little games and little crap that goes on. But when it comes down to a problem, something serious going on, we go to each other, and there's no bullshit. When there's something serious being talked about, it's not talked about with the other guys or with anybody else. It's like an unwritten law. And I definitely like that."

I remember reading it and going "it was... almost normal, until you specified that 1) it was a silent law 2) you liked it that way"

I dont think saying that James has trust issue is something controversial or new, so im taking that for granted to focus on WHEN he gives his trust and how with Lars he constantly gave it and took it away for DECADES.

A part from the fucked up part where you relish in having a secret deep bond that separates you from the rest of your bandmates + the fact that you dont even needed to state the rule for the rule to be born... what james is saying here is "when there is something important, i can trust him" and more specifically "i choose to go to him and no one else" (and the sentiment goes both ways but lars' side is not the point here) "because i trust him and not the other guys with what i consider important".

Now, imagine knowing this, having read this interview and many more, where EVEN IN THE 90S --even at the peak of rock 'n roll lifestyles, dysfunctions, white jackets, "little games, little whispers", aesthetic debates and so on-- you remember that EVEN THEN Lars talked about how the two of them had a lot of fights but couldn't bear to let pass more than 3 minutes before going to the other and apologize. And, uno mas: you have lars going around being happy that they both had children in the same year and talking about them growing older together!

THEN, be me in 2020, finally getting the This monster lives! book (the book abt the making of SKOM) and you read this:

JAMES: [...] I want to feel some trust. (to Lars) I just feel static all the time from you. PHIL: (to James) What would it take for you to trust him? JAMES: I have no idea. PHIL: No, what would it look like? JAMES: With him? I don't know. I don't know if I've ever seen it.

apart from me being gutted (bc believe me that if my 15+ year friend said that to me i would have had trouble breathing) i was.... disoriented? perplexed? like, yeah, it was a tough period and I can imagine that James would have some difficulty trusting Lars in that moment but... the last line? talking like trusting lars or lars being trust worthy was something that never could happen?? it. it doesn't make any sense.

He is not trying to be mean or hurt lars, he is being sincere and he is honestly trying to resolve their issues. He is saying what he is feeling in the moment.

and that goes even more sideways when Lars confesses his needs and vulnerabilities regarding James and--

JAMES: It doesn't hit me right... I don't know... PHIL: Doesn't hit you right, meaning you think he's bullshitting you? JAMES: Sure.

He doesn't even trust what Lars is saying IN THIS MOMENT. Not a word from his mouth. how could it be? How you can go from being weirdly proud of having a secret cult with only two members to *move hands* this.

He says, and i quote, "because there's been twenty years of mistrust", so basically every single year of their friendship (look at me jumping out of a bridge at this part because jesus FUCK it would hurt less). And look, I dont know them, and you can lie to the press, you can lie to the fans, you can act and pretend all you want bc it's the show business -- so it could be that all the times before james lied.

But if i believed in those lies,, so had Lars bc not long after that he fucked right off the room to take a breather.

But let's put to the side this, because Phil was a good therapist and took James through his reasonings about trust and especially why he feels this distrusting towards Lars in particular:

JAMES: [...] Like, when I walked in, I wanted to hug everyone in the room, but I didn't want to hug you. There's how I felt. It's not a lack of love. I didn't feel like touching you that way. I was carrying some of that ugliness, and it's not good for me. PHIL: And when he reached out for you, did you feel it was genuine? Or would you prefer to believe it wasn't, so you could feel safe? JAMES: Sure, that's the safest way to go, for sure. PHIL: So mistrust is a defence against being hurt. I mean, the more we find a reason not to trust somebody, the safer we feel. The closest relationships have the most difficulty with trust. JAMES: Uh-huh. KIRK: That's. Uh. Pretty amazing. JAMES: Because there is so much more to get hurt with, or so much to lose.

Basically, Lars was special.

That's it. That's the deal.

What James feels towards Lars is so big, it could go so wrong, it could hurt so much- that is better not opening to it, not trusting it --him.

Knowing this, all the parentheses click shut behind.

This is a big turning point in their approach to one another, imho. On Lars' end too, but you asked abt James so I'm gonna contain myself.

But I gotta say that, in MY OPINION, ABSOLUTELY OPINIONATED VIEW BASED ON WHAT I'VE SEEN AND NOTHING ELSE SO TAKE IT FOR WAT IT IS-- Lars after this learned not to need James so much, or he tried to. He confessed that he had a special need for him, to have a special connection, on a deeper level. And, like, it happens, when it happens in friendships is BRUTAL (have you ever considered someone your absolute bff to then discover they just thought you a casual friend? IMAGINE AFTER 20 YEARS).

So, to me, it felt like... He started to ask less, to ask of James what he would ask of his other friends and no more.

What did James do?

Started to point out how Lars was instrumental in the earlier days

Gave a lot more compliments and started to consistently underline in a positive way the length of their relationship

Saying OUT LOUD that he is special to him

Doing the weird thing that he does 85% of the time when the interviewer ask about Metallica in general and he just brings up Lars, only Lars. DUDE YOU HAVE OTHER 2 BAND MEMBERS (I don't think he does it consciously sjsjsjsjs and he loves rob and kirk! BUT DUDE)

>>>>>> he lets Lars do whatever the fuck he wants with him.

I'm gonna expand the last one BC it was the first that I noticed back then. Mind you, Lars had always had Lars Privileges™️, I'm not even listing things bc it's everywhere, but now? like, 2005/6 going forward???? James consciously and openly let him and djjeksksksksk Lars noticed and basically did what he always does (the little shit): run with it to see how far he could push. Famously from that era: he wore NAKED AND SWEATY James embroidered bathrobe, saying that if someone could, that would be him, sitting on James' special stool, because he could. and then he started saying embarrassing shit about them in front of him, with James just ignoring him or looking in the middle distance, like "why the fuck he is like that" BUT LETTING HIM.

Where is the gifset abt the XXX anniversary where James said "I know that Lars is doing stuff behind me" --and Lars immediately starting doing that-- "but it's okay because only Lars can do that".

HE STARTED TO SPELLING IT OUT, HE IS NOT AFRAID ANYMORE.

All of this to say: they always have been like this to a degree, now James just lets himself (and Lars) live it as it is.

Look at them being sixty and living their best weirdo life.

[ultimateissuessimp]

Hate to be that guy but a male x cat king soulmate au. Where you can’t see colour till u meet your soulmate. Pretty please with a cherry on top. Ty 🥺

"Hate to be that guy" and then proceeds to request one of my favourite tropes. My sweet, darling anon - THANK YOU! Writing this was a joy and a pleasure!

Also, not to say anything, buuuut I would be more than happy to write a part 2 for this 🤭 But I didn't say anything, completely nothing 🤫

Oel ngati kameie, Nga Yawne Lu Oer (I see you, I love you)

The Cat King x Male Reader

Word count: 1,935

Warnings: None I think

One case. One little case can change someone's life like nothing else could. Y/N didn't know if for the better or for worse, because now he was standing in front of the Cat King alongside his friends. Edwin, of course as stubborn as ever, simply had to disregard everything that Y/N had said about staying as low as possible and used a magic on an animal. A cat to be precise if it wasn't obvious already. That's how they found themselves in the situation they were at the moment.

His eyes were nervously going all around seeing all those cats gathered behind them. All of them in scales of gray that he was so used to when he was seeing it for the -nth time throughout his life. So basically all of it. After the little showcase of what they were capable of with their previous victim, he was on edge. Edwin was trying to diplomatically resolve the issue yet the Cat King didn't seem to really be happy with any of his words. When he mentioned a talk in private, Y/N head whipped up and for just a moment looked into the Cat King's eyes who turned his gaze towards the young man, because of his sudden movement before they went back to Edwin.

Then, as if suddenly someone hit the pause button on him, he froze. Colours slowly started filling his vision and at the centre of it was him. Edwin. He was sure he had found his soulmate. So many centuries alone. On his own. Now he finally found him, his other half. Or so he thought at least. While Thomas was marveling at the thought of finding his soulmate though in the wrong person, the right one quietly gasped in shock as his vision slowly filled with colours too.

The Cat King teleported both Edwin and himself to his private room, away from prying eyes and nosy personalities. Somewhere where he could get to know his "soulmate" better. What he was like, what he liked, disliked, what was his favourite colour, why did he use magic on a cat. About the last one... Now that he knew, thought, that Edwin was his "soulmate" he was less angry about the incident the ghost caused. He was more inclined on letting the man go, not really, without a punishment.

-Well, I was supposed to punish you for your... Misdeed, but since you're my soulmate- - the Cat King started speaking, a huge grin on his face as he got slightly closer to Edwin, his hands outstretched a bit to the sides before the man himself interrupted him.

-I'm sorry? Soulmate? Surely not. I can't be your soulmate, I've been looking at you for quite some time now and I still can't see colours. Just boring, but classy, gray - he said, looking incredulously at Thomas, putting some distance between them.

-What do you mean by that? Literally the moment I properly looked into your eyes the colours... They started to just appe- - and before he could end a sentence again, he was stopped. This time by the subject he was talking about suddenly disappearing. His world was bleak and boring again. He didn't understand and so didn't Y/N when he blinked and instead of seeing colours he was so fascinated by, yet quite displeased with the choice of clothing he made the previous morning, since none of the colours matched, at all, he saw the familiar scales of gray.

Feeling defeated, the Cat King sighed. Yet an idea struck him. Since he saw colours, even if for a short period of time, that means that his soulmate has to be either of Edwin's friends that he made eye contact with. He just needed some time and after all find a punishment for Edwin. He wasn't keen anymore on letting him off the hook and, even so, had more motivation to keep him in town. If Edwin can't leave, none of his friends can leave either. Then he could find his soulmate he so longed for. That's why he "caged" the ghost in town with a bracelet that only he could take off after Edwin counts all the cats in Port Townsend. Two birds with one stone. Teaching Edwin a lesson to never again use a magic on a cat and also finally meeting his soulmate. Life couldn't get more perfect. Well, it could, but that will come with time.

When he sent Edwin back to his friends and his soulmate, the Cat King silently observed the group from the shadows, silently telling a few of his cats to follow the detectives so he could monitor what they were doing, were they were and if they were in any trouble. After all, he couldn't let anything happen to his little lover. Who ever it was. Y/N was having an internal fight over what to do with the newfound information about his soulmate. He was so curious, yet had to remain cautious and careful when it came to the person that trapped his friend and in a way threatened him. He felt conflicted.

Then the case of the lighthouse came up. Strange, a bit terrifying, especially after Y/N started hearing the voice of the Cat King, calling to him. It was so irresistible yet thanks to the boys, Crystal and Niko, he came back to his senses and took a few steps away from the ledge. When Edwin silently tried to sneak away into the woods, he followed him, sneaking away just as silently as him.

He saw the cat that they were following an immediately understood, his heart skipping a few beats and making him stomp on a tree branch which in a chain reaction made Edwin snap his head towards him and the cat stop in its track. He smiled awkwardly and waved explaining that he was simply going on a little walk, but obviously Edwin didn't believe him.

-What don't you understand I will come back in a few minutes?? That was NOT an invitation to follow me! - Edwin whisper yelled at Y/N, a mostly annoyed look gracing his face before he turned around to follow the cat once again, making the man behind him stumble slightly when he tried to catch up quickly.

-Oh come on, you're being secretive, you're sneaking away and you're expecting that I WON'T follow you? Really Edwin? You're my friend. I'm worried - Y/N said, slightly out of breath, because of the jog he had to perform after the man in front of him.

-While appreciated, very much not needed. I'm fine - Edwin replied, looking back only for a second with a serious expression. They got to a clearing and saw no one other than the Cat King. Well, the man himself only saw Edwin at first, Y/N staying a bit back in nervousness.

Still no colours while looking at the ghost. Disappointing. Then the cat that dragged Edwin, and accidentally Y/N too, over to its king hissed and pawed at the leg of Y/N's pants, making him slightly flinch and take a step to the side, revealing himself completely to Thomas' eyes.

-Well look at what the cat dragged in! Aren't you a jewel - he said with a cocky grin, going around Edwin to stand before Y/N and taking his chin into his hand to take a better look at him. That's when their eyes met and the magic happened.

Instant reaction, colours bursting all around as they stared, wide eyed, at each other. There they were. "The most gorgeous of eyes" was the first thought that came to both of their minds. They completely forgot Edwin who was now staring in confusion at the scene before him, yet unsure if to interrupt or not.

-I see you - the Cat King said quietly, almost unlike himself at all, mentally adding "and I love you". He thought that if he said that out loud at that moment, he would scare away the poor guy. His hands cupped the sides of Y/N's face, holding it gently like the dearest of treasures he owned and in a way it was true. Although he didn't own Y/N nor his heart, not yet at least, the man himself definitely already owned Thomas'. Maybe without even knowing it.

-And I see you - Y/N replied, his breath caught in his throat as his wide eyes frantically looked around the Cat King's face, noticing every detail, every discolouration and adoring each and every shade that appeared in his eyes.

-Surely not-... Are you seeing colours, Y/N? - Edwin suddenly piped in, completely ruining the moment, but he couldn't blame him or be mad at him. He would be confused as all hell too if he saw his friend have a quite intimate moment with someone who made his life slightly more impossible to get through.

They turned to the ghost detective, a massive grin, like never before, on Thomas' face while a shy smile graced Y/N's. Obviously the Cat King, the man that he was, immediately wrapped his arm around his soulmates' shoulder, keeping him close to himself as if he was afraid the man would suddenly disappear like the colours did before he realised Edwin wasn't his soulmate. He never wants to feel what he felt at that moment again.

-Why, my ghostly friend. This adorable specimen over here is my soulmate - he said proudly, keeping close to Y/N yet not in a possessive way as if he was afraid Edwin would suddenly try to take him away for some reason, but more in a protective way. Physical, psychological, emotional, it didn't matter.

-Soulmate?? Surely you must be having a laugh! Right Y/N? You still can't see colours right? - Edwin asked, hands on his hips as he stood there, expecting only one possible option in his mind: a positive answer to his question. Yet he couldn't help the way his eyes widened and his mouth opened a little when he saw Y/N smile sheepishly at him and quickly look away. - We will talk about this later. There are 142 cats in Port Townsend. Now take this off - Edwin added, this time speaking to the Cat King which only rewarded him with a condescending chuckle.

-There are absolutely not 142 cats. Keep counting the cats, Edwin - Thomas said with a smile before swiftly turning himself and Y/N around so they could walk away and talk about their newfound relationship, completely leaving the ghost behind.

-This is absurd! How can this make you happy?! - Edwin shouted after the pair, but mostly the Cat King, annoyed out of his mind at the behaviour the man was presenting him with.

-Well, it keeps you in town, with you sweet Y/N over here and thanks to that I can get to know my soulmate better! - he answered with a cheeky smirk and a wink sent Edwin's wave, adding a little wave with his fingers while both of the men left, in a way abandoning him behind. You'd think Y/N would notice his friend staying back, huffing and puffing about being left alone, but he was so absorbed in looking around and taking in his surroundings, the colours that he payed half mind to where he was even going. At that moment all that mattered to him was the fact that he could finally notice the beauty of the world around him and it was all thanks to just one person. Destiny works in the most mysterious of ways.

[drdtships]

I humbly ask for teruvid headcanons :3

i hasth humbly received thine request, and i shall humbly come forth with headcanons for you. hope they're to your enjoyment, and sorry you had to wait for so long!!

⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢⌢

˗ˏˋ ★ ― TERUVID HEADCANONS‼

꒰1 ୨୧◞ 。if teruko is sitting down whilst talking to somebody, david likes going behind her and simply resting his arms on teruko’s head while greeting the other person as if teruko doesn’t even exist. it annoyed teruko at first, but she just grew to get used to it⠀.ᐟ

꒰2 ୨୧◞ 。sometimes they’ll just have late night talks about the things that they’re bottling up. even if they can’t actually do anything much to help the other, it’s still nice to talk about these things seeing as the other is the one who understands them the most⠀.ᐟ

꒰3 ୨୧◞ 。teruko is obviously a mess in the kitchen, while david can cook a decent meal..the keyword being decent, because a lot of the time he can’t muster up the energy to do so. meaning they get take-out fairly often. due to teruko’s bad luck, however, the order seems to be messed up every time to the point where they make bets on what’ll be screwed up each time they order. ⠀.ᐟ

꒰4 ୨୧◞ 。teruko is the type to pull david by the collar to get him on her level if they’re having a disagreement. not that david doesn’t like this sort of treatment, that is⠀.ᐟ

꒰5 ୨୧◞ 。’i love you’ is a bit of a rare phrase for the two of them. they don’t have to say it a lot in order to express that feeling. it’s usually only used whilst comforting the other, or when they don’t think the other can hear (david more than teruko)⠀.ᐟ

꒰6 ୨୧◞ 。it took a while for them to be physically affectionate, more on teruko’s side than david’s. whenever they do take that step, it’s usually in the comforts of their own living space⠀.ᐟ

꒰7 ୨୧◞ 。sometimes when they’re talking to people and the person says something stupid or outrageous, the two will sort of just share a look that sort of expresses ‘really?’ or ‘did they seriously just say that’? they’re both die-hard judgers⠀.ᐟ

꒰8 ୨୧◞ 。while teruko isn’t exactly feminine with her outfits, she does wish to be a little more so. meaning whenever she does step out of her comfort zone and wear something that could be seen as more girlish than usual, david ends up making a flirty comment about it. teruko usually just brushes him off with an annoyed look, but teruko does enjoy it slightly the same way that david is genuine with it even with his theatrics⠀.ᐟ

꒰9 ୨୧◞ 。before they were dating, there was SO much tension. there was probably a bet within the class as to how they’d end up ⠀.ᐟ

꒰10 ୨୧◞ 。they do have a lot of small arguments, which would result in them blowing off the other for a day or two. for these, however, they don’t really need a verbal apology. somehow they’ll roll back around to the other and life goes on with the two of them still together⠀.ᐟ

꒰11 ୨୧◞ 。they’re both the type to attempt distracting themselves from their problems–especially david. so of course, they’re each other’s go-to for getting away from their problems⠀.ᐟ

꒰12 ୨୧◞ 。once when they were passing by a store together, teruko had seen a teddy bear on display. she hadn’t said anything, but her eyes lingered a little longer on that than most other things. a bit later, when she got home, teruko noticed a bear on her pillow. david didn’t mention it, but she knew that he had gotten it for her. ⠀.ᐟ

꒰13 ୨୧◞ 。their relationship was probably kind of rocky at the start, until they managed to lay down some basics that they wanted in the relationship. which admittedly was a very awkward conversation seeing as they’re not the most open about their feelings⠀.ᐟ

꒰14 ୨୧◞ 。a lot of the times when they’re tired, one will simply sit next to the other and be in their presence. it doesn’t resolve the issue, but it makes them feel slightly calmer being near somebody they know loves them⠀.ᐟ

꒰15 ୨୧◞ 。a lot of the time david will suggest something to teruko (usually stupid date ideas or conversation topics) and teruko will just stare at him blankly before completely changing the subject ⠀.ᐟ

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣