#and his hyena shrieks

[sentfromwolves]

hey writeblr I'm curious: what do you think is the most distinctive trait of your main character/s that your readers will pickup on?

[tedthetalk]

Antagonist exists as a lot of things, a shadow on the narrative, the rot in the foundation of the industry, someone to have done it first and give a path to follow — but the most visceral truth of him is the living bleeding proof of what mecha do to a person, and what happens when the iron control it forces on pilots on pain of death either snaps or is willingly tossed aside

[hedgehog-moss]

Look, friends.

Do you think this is a post about my adorable baby succulents? No. Look harder.

It's about the GIANT HOLE IN MY FENCE that I had to patch up with cardboard.

I can't blame Pampérigouste for this one; the brutish nature of the damage is not consistent with her usual modus operandi. Pampe outsmarts locks like Arsène Lupin; she doesn't charge at fences like a bull who saw a red cloth. This is Pampe Pondering A Fence Problem:

No, the damage to my fence looked a lot more mindless this time. Boorish. Boar-ish. I'm blaming a boar. A deer would have destroyed the whole thing rather than just the lower half. Note that there is not a single tuft of llama wool on the damaged wire mesh.

(Note no.2: the boar's smile was originally meant to be a tusk but it really just looks like a sardonic smile)

I brought some chicken wire to patch up the hole—but there wasn't enough of it. Then it started raining and I felt persecuted and decided to just cover the hole with cardboard and go have my morning coffee and get back to this later.

This is not an Innocent Pampe post; there is no such thing. My temporary cardboard solution lasted 8 to 10 minutes. I'm not sure exactly when she got out, but by the time I went back outside to repair the fence there was a Pampe-shaped hole in the cardboard.

(Not really; she just kind of lifted or ate a corner then wormed her way through the very small opening. I think.) (See, this is how you recognise a Pampe escape: you're not entirely clear on what went down, you just know there was a llama inside and now there is a llama outside.)

It was still raining and I didn't feel like going after her, plus it felt pointless to bring her back in her pasture before the fence was repaired, so I went in the barn to look for my tools and rummage through leftover pieces of previously-destroyed fences, hoping to find something the right size.

Then I heard Pampelune's hyena shriek, aka the llama alarm call. It was followed by:

horrified chicken screams and frantic feather noises; the soundtrack of a violent fox attack

infuriated barking from Pandolf

very loud panicked braying from Pirlouit

basically, chaos.

I ran outside just in time to see Pampe emerging from the woods at a full gallop, pursued by a bear. I didn't immediately identify the animal that was chasing her as the giant dog that he was, because he was running with a weird gait, with his legs going everywhere like he was frolicking at top speed (I now know that this dog is a puppy that has learnt to run just a few months ago, but that didn't occur to me at the time because this puppy is the size of a calf.)

Pampe was running towards the cardboard through which she had escaped and she managed to squeeze through her small corner hole again (I assume—there were trees blocking my line of sight and I only saw her again once she was in the pasture, running for her life along with the other 2 llamas + donkey.) Meanwhile, the dog didn't see the corner hole and tried to power through the cardboard much like a boar, or was carried away by his momentum and didn't brake in time; I don't know. In any case, when I reached him, he was stuck.

My large piece of cardboard was tied to the fence posts and still holding strong, but the middle was a bit soggy with rain and not too solid, so the dog's head went right through it. The rest of his body didn't.

He could have probably finished breaking the cardboard quite easily, but for some reason he instantly gave up. On life. By the time I got there the dog was half-in and half-out of the pasture and he looked defeated. Which made my piece of cardboard look like a mediaeval beheading apparatus with just a hole for the head.

I went to lock an angry Pandolf in the barn and checked on the chickens along the way (ruffled & offended but fine); I was hoping the dog would figure out how to extricate his head from the cardboard in the meantime. He did not. I tried to call him in a friendly tone (from behind) to encourage him to free his head by stepping back, but the concept of taking a couple of steps backwards in order to extract his head from the hole might as well have been advanced engineering. He clearly had no idea where his head was, where his body was, how to make the two a coherent whole again, and he started whining pitifully.

I untied the rope I had used to attach the cardboard to the fence posts, then wriggled the piece of cardboard a bit to try and free the dog's head. The dog was alarmed by the wriggling and took several steps back—but I didn't manage to hold on to the cardboard so it just moved with the dog. He clumsily ran away, taking the cardboard with him, wearing it around his neck like the world's largest cone of shame.

He immediately got stuck between two trees.

I was starting to find the situation hilarious, but the poor dog did not—he lay down and started making sad broken noises like a malfunctioning dog-robot. He didn't look very threatening but he was still a very big (and stressed) dog so I felt a bit wary of touching his head to help him, and decided to run home to get a box cutter. I figured I could easily rid him of most of the cardboard and leave him with just a soggy cardboard collar that would soon fall apart. I heard my landline phone ringing from afar and ran faster, and it was one of my nearest neighbours, the retired lady who lives on the plateau.

"I've been trying to reach you!! I saw your llama in my garden earlier, I was going to give her a little treat—" (she loves Pampe, for some reason) "—but then my dog saw her too."

I know this woman's dog—he's a tiny thing with fragile nerves who thinks the whole world is out to get him, so I asked anxiously, "Did Pampe scare your dog?" and she said "Oh no! Domino is here with me; but I have a new dog. His name is Texas."

I thought of the gigantic puppy currently sobbing in my woods, held prisoner by two trees, a self-inflicted cone of shame and his total lack of reasoning skills.

"Yes", I said. "I've met Texas."

The old lady asked worriedly if he'd scared Pampe ("Il est un peu zinzin" she said—he's a bit crazy. "I wanted to call him Rex, but then I met him and thought—Texas!!") I told her I was pleased with her dog for scaring Pampe, because she needs to learn that her pasture is her only hope for safety in this cold uncaring world and as soon as she steps out of it she returns to her lowly status as a prey animal. Then I ended the phone call because I was worried both about Texas and about the large hole in my fence. Thankfully all my animals were still terrified and hiding far, far away from Texas.

Texas actually managed to free himself before I attempted to cut the cardboard, but he still thought of me as his saviour and was very happy to follow me through the woods back to his owner's place. Before we left I propped up the cardboard against the damaged fence, and despite the hole in the middle no llamas escaped in my absence; I think the whole area still smelled like Texas and fear.

I'll admit I was initially tempted to leave Texas with his head stuck in the cardboard in a more permanent capacity in order to patch the hole in my fence with this amazing anti-Pampe Cerberus. Like this

(I know this artistic rendering makes my llamas look like frightened carrots and my donkey like a bunny but I will not be taking constructive criticism at this time)

[sunkendreams]

kickstart my heart.

REQUEST SUBMITTED BY @darklylucid

“Paul’s always been flirty, and you’ve never really taken it seriously. After a minor incident on the boardwalk, Paul decides that he’ll make you take him seriously, one way or another.”

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆. | paul (the lost boys) x fem!reader.

𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓. | one-shot — requested.

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓. | 6.8K.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒. | SMUT (mdni), friends to lovers, jealous!paul, paul is really flirty/touchy, oral sex (f!receiving), spit as lube, choking (m!receiving), hair-pulling, paul is definitely a mess, dirty talk, pet names (baby, girl, sweet girl), cowgirl, vaginal sex, scratching, biting, bloodplay (he’s a vampire), breastplay (paul loves your tits), fingering, clothes ripping, groping, nasty sex, manhandling, paul isn’t gentle

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑’𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄. | i’m back and literally going insane for the lost boys ,,, thank you to @darklylucid for requesting this !!! first time writing Paul and it was so, so much fun! dwayne is up next, so prepare yourselves for that! also working on a poly!lost boys x reader series ,,, so yeah!

A cloudless dusk fell over Santa Carla, sky littered with millions of stars that hung above, providing a rather attractive backdrop to a less-than-savory town. The boardwalk was more alive than ever — it transformed with nightfall, becoming a den of depravity and mystique, coupled with the liveliness of families and the carnival atmosphere.

You were situated atop a blanket, feet partially buried within the cool sand as you sat on the beach. A concert took place many feet away as you watched people clamor from the staircase to the growing crowd. The rancor of music reverberated throughout the air, accompanied by the cheering and applause from onlookers.

Saltwater lapped at the gray shoreline, moon hanging overhead to light the way. You always came to the boardwalk at night — you made plenty of friends, but you happened to have a peculiar bond with a pack of vampires. It wasn’t intentional — you never meant to befriend them like you had, but you didn’t regret a thing.

The familiar roar of motorbikes resonated in the near-distance, splitting past swarms of carnival-goers as they descended the steps. It never took very long for them to find you, bearing down upon you like a pack of hyenas.

Marko’s laughter filled the air as he and Dwayne pulled up along the terrace above you, parking their bikes next to the length of black grating. David and Paul followed suit, hauling Star and Laddie in-tow. You were more focused on the gleam of the moonlight hitting the water and the seashell you’d been turning over within your palm.

A thump resonated from your left side, and you nearly shrieked, jumping from your own flesh as Paul landed atop the blanket. He scooped a finger against your chin, plump lips pulled back to reveal his pearlescent smirk. A faint aroma of stale cologne and hints of marijuana clung to him, but that was commonplace.

“Hey baby,” Paul crooned, kicking one leg up against his chest as the rest of the boys lingered around the balcony, save for Marko. He descended from above like a cat leaping toward perch, landing in the sand with grace. His presence was intentional, solely to agitate Paul. “Where’ve you been?”

Paul’s constant flirtation was something that you were used to — painfully so. You always wrote it off as something casual, a facet deeply ingrained into his wild and spontaneous personality. Paul often flirted with anyone that had a pulse and smelled appeasing, and that included you. It was fun to watch, but sometimes you wished that he meant it.

With a huff, you attempted to swat his hand away, but he was swift, arm resting atop his propped knee as he idly bounced his head to the music. “I’ve been here,” You mused, offering a kind greeting to Marko. “Where else am I supposed to be?” You inquired, tracing the pad of your thumb over the seashell’s ridges.

Paul’s nose wrinkled slightly. “I can think of a few places,” He mused, plucking at the top of your blouse. “You gonna come down tonight?” He asked, referring to you joining them in the cave. You normally went there with the group if they were satiated and fed. You were still human, after all — being in a nest full of vampires probably wasn’t the safest or smartest idea.

“Maybe,” You shrugged, feeling Paul perch his chin atop your shoulder. The physical aspect of his flirting always made your heart race, thrumming just underneath your collarbone. Your gaze flickered toward him, brows furrowing together. “What?”

“Please?” Paul insisted, lips twitching into a Cheshire smirk, teeth and all. “Wanna hang out with you.” Of all the pack, you were closest to Paul, but sometimes, you didn’t want to be. His constant touching and lascivious nature often left you wistful and confused, aching for something that he couldn’t give you.

“Don’t listen to him,” Marko interjected, busy ogling a wandering group of beachgoers — a gaggle of younger women hanging off of the arms of burly men. It smelled like potential dinner for him. “He found a guitar.” That was all you needed to know.

A giggle escaped you as Paul threw a handful of sand toward Marko, which happened to land against his patchwork jacket and golden curls. His visage contorted into a sour expression, glaring daggers at Paul before he stood up, shaking all of it out in the process.

“You found a guitar?” You asked, watching as Paul pushed your legs flat against the blanket, allowing him to rest his head within your lap. Admittedly, your heartbeat betrayed you — you wanted to be annoyed by the gesture, but instead, you let it go.

To Paul, you smelled outrageously wonderful — better than anything he’d had before. It was an amalgamation of softer, floral perfumes coupled with whatever wash you used. He detected peach and vanilla, sweeter aromas that clung to you like a pleasant haze.

His hair was akin to that of a lion’s mane, viciously unruly as it flew around him like a halo. “Yeah,” Paul replied, somewhat distracted by your scent. “Y’know, I didn’t find it. I stole it from these amateurs up by the empty lot.” Yoo assumed that these ‘amateurs’ were no longer alive, either.

“Aren’t you considered an amateur too, Paul?” You mused, reclining back upon your hands, letting yourself sink into the soft, white sand. As you glanced down toward your lap, Paul was staring at you for what felt like an eternity, and you couldn’t discern if it was out of offense or something else.

“You’re gorgeous,” Paul mumbled, tracing one of his ring-adorned digits over the expanse of your clothed stomach. “Lookin’ good enough to eat.” He mused, and while you would’ve initially brushed off that comment, he said it with a peculiar warmth.

Goosebumps erupted along the column of your spine, causing you to shift slightly. His finger didn’t stop moving, flicking around the ruffled cotton. He wished that it was your flesh — warm and soft, waiting to invite him in. You never took any of his flirtation to heart — in truth, it might’ve been his fault, but he wanted to make you see.

You belonged to him.

With a soft exhale, you attempted to mask your shudder of delight, absentmindedly nibbling along your lower lip. “Very original,” You uttered, twisting away from his touch as if it would incinerate you. It was all meaningless — mindless sweet nothings spoken from a very precocious individual. “You’re a genius.” You teased, voice becoming slightly sardonic.

“You are,” He insisted, comfortable within your plush lap. Your scent did little to ease his feelings, overwhelming him like a thick haze. “Baby, you’re the prettiest thing I’ve seen in ages. Where’ve you been all my life?” Paul sighed, and he didn’t attempt to touch you again out of respect.

“Right,” You uttered, masking your growing agitation. Paul could have anyone he wanted — and he always did. Girls at the boardwalk swooned over him, they were always easy prey, and he indulged himself plenty of times. You were nothing more than a friend, you weren’t desirable, nor would he ever want you. “You’ve told me that before.”

Paul visibly deflated, withering away like a shriveling flower — you really weren’t convinced.

Unfortunately for Paul, you were blissfully oblivious to any of his advances, but then again, he could understand why you were skeptical. Flirtation was a natural instinct for him. While he kept his head in your lap, he shamelessly opted to rove through your thoughts. It was cheating, sure, but he was itching to know.

“Paul,” Dwayne’s voice cut through his state of contemplation, rousing the sandy-haired blonde from his stupor. Paul’s head lifted off of your lap, hastily sitting upright as he glanced up at the terrace. “We’re going for a ride.” He briefly nodded towards you as a form of greeting, swinging Laddie up onto his bike.

“You’re coming, right?” Paul asked, voice invigorated with a sense of giddiness and excitement. He got a little wild around you sometimes, but it wasn’t anything that you weren’t accustomed to by now. “Do I have to beg you or something?” He groaned, trapping you between his arms.

“You’re pathetic!” Marko snickered, jumping down to snatch you up. Even though he was the smallest of the pack, his strength was often unrivaled, save for Dwayne. You let out a startled gasp as Marko hoisted you up over his shoulder, heckling Paul in the process.

Paul bristled with anger — typically, he could excuse Marko’s antics, but not this time. A white-hot rage blistered through him, crawling across his flesh as he attempted to shake that gold away from his eyes. A snarl escaped him, and he made sure to grab your stuff as a courtesy, leaping up over the bannister.

By the time Paul had landed on the rickety wood of the boardwalk, Marko had placed you on solid ground, unable to bite back the impish smirk on his features. He was deliberately getting under Paul’s skin, and he knew it — knew all about his feelings for you, too. Perhaps that’s what made it all the more enjoyable.

Like a bat out of hell, Paul swarmed the curly-headed blonde with a vengeance, countenance contorted into a look of sheer irritation and borderline rage. “You’re dead, Marko!” He growled, lip curled in disdain.

“Sorry, Paul. You made it too easy,” Marko mused, narrowly missing a rather unsavory blow from Paul, who yanked at his jacket instead. “Jesus! Easy, I was only messing around!” He snapped, with the two bickering and locked in what was supposedly a heated argument.

“Paul,” You gently tugged on his coat, attempting to steer him away from potential violence. “It’s okay, he was just playing around.” A soft sigh escaped you as you played mediator for two vampires, brows knitting together as Paul stepped back with a huff of irritation.

“Enough.” David barked, glaring daggers as he glanced between Paul and Marko. The last thing that he wanted was for them to expose themselves on the boardwalk — it was bound to happen if they didn’t stop the horseplay. With a visible frown, he revved his motorbike, signaling for the others to fall in line.

Jealousy was an ugly thing — unpleasant, often festering inside of oneself until it rotted away at their very core. It didn’t suit Paul whatsoever. He suffered from a bout of such a potent disease, despising the way Marko had touched you, held you over his shoulder. He was usually open about sharing with his brothers, but not you — you were completely off-limits.

Wordlessly, Paul sulked towards his motorbike, sitting down with a begrudging huff. You felt inclined to follow, standing beside him with an empathetic expression. “Are you going to let me on? We’re still hanging out, remember?” You asked, voice softening an octave.

Paul felt a little better — but not completely. His ego was momentarily maimed by Marko’s antics, but it was a wound that would dissipate with time. Fortunately, you were a worthy cure as he moved forward, letting you on the back of his bike. “Saved your stuff, too.” He mused, feeling you squeeze your arms around his midsection.

“You’re my hero,” You chuckled, trying to make him feel less agitated. “Thanks.” With Paul recovering from the scuffle, David motioned for the rest of the conclave to follow, whipping his bike around onto the stretch of the boardwalk that led out onto the shoreline.

You remembered the first time Paul took you for a ride — and you very nearly had a heart attack. He drove as if it’d be his last day on earth, but you’d gotten so used to it that you stopped being a backseat driver and let him do whatever he wanted.

He was talkative and boisterous by-nature, which is why you became so concerned when he didn’t talk to you very much on the ride to the cave. Paul was normally extremely egregious and outgoing, something that you loved about him, but his bout of silence was making you nervous. You wondered if Marko had wounded his pride that badly.

As you pulled up to the cave, the boys hopped off of their motorbikes, and even Paul didn’t really wait up for you this time — something was wrong. Marko noticed, lingering at the fringes of the cavern as he glanced at you, promptly disappearing down the rocky incline. You were left to make your way inside alone, no Paul at your side or helping you down.

Once inside, you felt awkward, more than usual. Being the lone human in a nest full of vampires would always bring a little tension, but without Paul around, you felt hollow and unnerved. David regarded you with his typical stare — cynical and somewhat indifferent, and Dwayne was always solemn, much warmer than the other.

“Where did Paul go?” You asked, and it was Laddie who pointed you in the right direction, pointing toward one of the rocky tunnels that led off into their ‘rooms’, of sorts. You often referred to them as the metaphorical coffins, but Star found it to be in poor taste.

With a shaky exhale, you nodded. “Thanks.” You’d been in Paul’s ‘room’ plenty of times before, but he rarely disappeared and left you to fend for yourself. With the coordination of a baby deer who’d just learned how to take their first steps, you clamored up the uneven terrain, holding onto the rope to guide yourself up.

When you found Paul, he was lazily strumming on a guitar — the one he’d ‘found’. He had one leg kicked up, propped against the rock, the other tucked towards his chest as he played a few chords. The lack of acknowledgement sent off several red flags as you swept aside the makeshift ‘door’ — an old, velvet curtain repurposed from the hotel wreckage.

“Thanks for waiting on me,” You uttered, tone dripping with sarcasm, which captured his attention. He smelled you long before you’d entered, prompting him to turn his head, lion’s mane of hair disheveled and tousled from being pressed against a pillow. “You know, if I knew you were going to sulk around this whole time, I would’ve gone to the comic store instead.”

Paul scoffed, countenance twisting into a look of agitation, which was so unlike him. It shocked you to see him behave with such indifference, something that went against the grain of his character. “Maybe Marko can go with you.” He uttered, playing another melancholy chord on the guitar.

That’s what this was about?

“You’re not serious,” You quipped, folding your arms across your chest. “Is this about what happened at the beach? Paul, I’m not a mind-reader — I didn’t know Marko was going to do that.” He was beginning to really piss you off, which hadn’t happened yet.

For all of the meaningless flirting he’d done, the constant teasing and toying, you were vigilant. You’d tried to keep your chin up through it all. You couldn’t fathom why he was so upset about Marko’s harmless stunt — it was all playful. It was something Paul would’ve done, truth be told. Paul kept quiet, reading your mind as he surveyed your rageful inner monologue.

Instead, you were met with a wall of silence, and that made you frustrated. If Paul was going to behave like a child, you’d treat him like one. With a huff of annoyance, you waved your hand in dismissal. Your night was mostly ruined, but you figured you’d go home and try to get some sleep.

You gave him another chance to talk — it was quiet. “Fine. I’m going home, Paul.” You sighed, turning around as you prepared to make the climb back down. With a shrug of your shoulders, you barely passed through the curtain before something rustled behind you.

Just as you grabbed the rope, Paul was in front of you with inhuman speed, and he immediately snatched at your hips, dragging you away. You were protesting, interrogating him about what exactly was going on, but he persisted, locking you in his arms as he pushed you up against the wall.

“I don’t want Marko touching you,” He murmured, brows knitting together. “I want you all to myself.” You couldn’t tell if this was playful Paul trying to flirt with you again — his tone sounded so different. “You’re mine, baby.” Paul clicked his tongue, brazenly groping at your waist.

“Wh— What?” Disbelief seeped into your voice as you shook your head back and forth. “Are you fucking with me again?” Before you could get in another word, his mouth was devouring yours, vigorous and completely needy. Jesus, he tasted good — without pause, your hands flew to grab his hair in fistfuls.

A desperate whimper erupted from your mouth, buried and lost within his ravenous kiss. You needed to know what had gotten into him — why now? You began to yank on his hair in an attempt to get him to cease, and when he did, you appeared more agitated than happy. Paul normally didn’t get this reaction when he kissed someone.

“You have to tell me what’s going on,” You huffed, gaze practically pleading with him as he held you close, inhaling another gust of your saccharine scent. “First you’re flirting, then you’re mad, and now this. What’s gotten into you?” With a pointed stare, Paul relented, but he didn’t move away from you.

“You don’t take my flirting seriously,” He countered, brows furrowing together. “You don’t want to? Fine, but I’m gonna make you see how bad I want you.” Paul murmured, voice husky and alluring enough to make your knees wobble. He licked his lower lip, one hand beginning to drift underneath your blouse.

This didn’t feel real — whenever you desperately tried to search for even an ounce of playfulness, there wasn’t any. Paul was completely serious about this, and it made you weak, warmth beginning to pool between your thighs as you nodded several times over. “Okay,” You breathed, itching for more. “Then don’t stop.”

“M’gonna fuck you,” Paul smirked, eyes unnaturally bright as they glistened in the dimly-lit alcove. “You mind if I eat you out, too?” He asked, matter-of-factly. His unruly tangle of dusty-blonde tresses were stiff with age-old product, making it somewhat coarse whenever you went to grab and pull on it.

Did you mind? Laughter bubbled within your chest as your lips parted, expression incredulous as you nodded several times over. “Whatever you want,” He was gorgeous — in that crazed and unhinged sort of way. Paul stared at you as if you were both a delicious slab of meat and the most beautiful thing he’d seen. “I want you.” You exhaled.

That was all it took for Paul to claw at your clothing as if it were nothing, fingers excitedly ruffling your blouse as he yanked it up, causing you to squeak. He wasn’t gentle, but you didn’t care whatsoever. Those veined, dexterous hands ripped your blouse off of you, tongue darting out to wet his lower lip.

He was pushing you towards his bed, which was only really used for salacious activities, and nothing more. It was a colossal mess, the scent stale and reminded you of damp rock as he got you on your back, crawling on top of you with a devilish grin.

“Fuck, baby,” Paul sighed, slicing your brassiere off with a simple stroke of his fingers, flinging the tattered remains elsewhere. “You’ve got such a gorgeous body.” He murmured, lips sloppily trailing over your neck and collarbone as he rucked your skirt up towards your hips. Your mewls and whimpers were like music to his ears.

“Paul,” You groaned, hips rocking forward as you ground yourself against him, meeting his groin. His jean-clad erection pressed into your thigh, completely and utterly shameless. He kissed wherever he pleased, stopping to admire your breasts as they rose and fell with your excitable gasps.

Trapping a nipple within his mouth, he greedily sucked and nibbled at your swollen mound, intermingling such ministrations with eager strokes of his tongue. “Pretty tits, too.” He guffawed, playfully biting at your breast as you clutched onto his hair. “S’all mine.” Paul huffed, kneading into your pliant chest with his other hand.

A pang of arousal coursed throughout your body, striking right between your thighs. Warmth coalesced between your legs, manifesting as a stickiness that oozed from your cunt. Paul nearly growled at the smell, which was calling to him like a siren’s song. He was tempted to rip away and go right to the source, but he loved your chest just as much.

Suckling on your breast, Paul promptly provided such attention to the other, greedily biting at the soft, pliant flesh. The way you bucked and squirmed underneath him was all the more enticing, cerulean hues fluttering toward your blissed-out countenance. You tugged on his hair, causing him to let out a satisfied hiss.

“Could stay here forever,” Paul mused, pressing messy kisses atop your perky tits, and he seemed to get a little ahead of himself in the moment. Kisses soon devolved into love-bites and sucking as he found a patch of skin between your breasts. He left a string of hickeys there, beyond content with his handiwork. “Perfect.”

“Jesus,” You groaned, a mess of moans and desperate, pathetic whimpers as you wrangled with his lion-like mane of hair. “You’re bad.” With a soft hiccup, you felt his hands knead into your hips, prepared to go elsewhere if you let him.

“I can be worse, baby.” Paul prompted, eyes swarming with that familiar golden glow, ringed with a red halo around the edge of his irises. He growled, capturing your mouth with his as he kissed you, ravenous and swift as he began to make out with you. He was between your legs, arms locked on either side of you.

With a wanton moan, your hands clamored from his tresses toward his coat, wanting him to shed a few layers, too. It was only fair. Paul complied, whipping his dark coat off with an excitable haste, peeling away the mesh shirt he wore underneath. Your palms splayed out across his broad shoulders, warm flesh melding with his icy temperature.

He was well-muscled, poised — he reminded you of a coiled jungle cat, prepared to pounce. You reveled in the smattering of hair peppered across his chiseled chest, leading toward the sandy-hued happy trail that slipped underneath his tattered white jeans. His teeth brazenly bit at your lower lip, blood oozing onto his tongue.

Between the clash of lips, tongue, and teeth, Paul shuddered, lapping up any pearl of crimson that he could, hands tearing your skirt asunder. The unfortunate remains of fabric were yanked away as he let it fall to the floor, groping and kneading into you, wherever his hands took him.

You’d never been kissed like this — as if he threatened to steal every wisp of air from your lungs, hungering for you in every imaginable way. Your heart hammered against your collarbone, thrumming erratically as you hitched a leg around his hips, drawing him closer as he kept you locked in a barrage of kisses.

“Fuck,” Paul groaned, licking at your lower lip. “You smell so good, baby. I wanna taste,” He insisted, ring-adorned digits curling into the waistband of your panties. He wrestled them down until they were hitched around your knees, but he simply tore at them like the rest of your clothes. “Spread your legs for me.”

It was your turn to go sheepish on him, deliberately parting your legs at a sluggish pace. You weren’t sure as to why you’d become shy, but Paul didn’t seem to care, swiping at a tendril of drool that pooled at the corner of his mouth. Without missing a beat, his hand slipped between your legs, two digits swiping up along your wet cunt.

He gathered your slick, placing his fingers into his mouth with a satisfactory groan. The sight of him sucking your arousal away nearly made you melt. “Almost as good as your blood, sweet girl.” Paul chuckled, absentmindedly licking his lower lip as he settled onto the mattress, pressed flat atop the surface as he gathered your legs into each of his hands.

Paul slathered several kisses against your inner thighs, but he kept it short and sweet — he was here for one thing. You expected him to give you some sort of warning beforehand. “Paul, are you — O-Oh. Jesus Christ!” You squeaked, a strangled gasp escaping you as your back arched off of the mattress.

There was no pause or waiting — Paul’s impulsivity got the best of him. He was on you like a starving animal, desperate for anything he could get. His tongue pushed past your slick folds, silkily lapping over the length of your slit, savoring your taste. It was hot — you felt as if everything were set ablaze as a pleasant heat crawled across you, from head to toe.

His tongue raked hot embers across your aching cunt, body electrified by his touch. Paul’s fingers greedily dug into your pliant thighs, tossing either of your legs over his freckled shoulders as he lapped at your sweet core. His actions were swift and fueled by lust, driven by instinct as he jerked you forward.

Your stomach churned with anticipation, bleeding heat from between your legs as your thighs squeezed at his head. You felt that immense mane of hair tickle your soft flesh, goosebumps erupting along your body. Paul grunted, face buried deep within your cunt as he ate you out, messy and sloppy as could be.

“M’not Jesus,” Paul slurred, grinning like a shark as he nipped at your leg. “You taste so good, baby.” He huffed, the words spoken through the husked voice of a ravenous vampire as he returned to lapping at your poor, needy slit. Each drop of nectar that you provided to him served to momentarily dull the ache within his throat.

You kept writhing and squirming, shamelessly bucking your hips forward. He pinned you down with one hand, head spinning as your scent wafted around him like an inescapable haze. “Paul!” You mewled, practically quivering like a leaf as your cunt pathetically clenched around nothing at all.

Paul was a good sport, able to flow with the constant jolting of your hips into his mouth. Though, it only served to fuel the fire as he continued to hastily drag his tongue along your cunt, slavering for your taste. You moaned, tapering off into a myriad of sweet whimpers as your hands relocated, reaching for his hair.

The cool metal of his rings left imprints behind atop your thighs, various patterns pressed into your flesh. You were aching, body feeling feverishly hot as you bucked into his face again, feeling him clamp down on you as he held you still. His mouth was divine — it was sloppy and full of an unrestrained need.

As your digits twined into his hair, you began to pull and tug, using his unruly tresses as an anchor. Paul didn’t care in the slightest — he found it unbelievably hot as you jerked and tugged, back arched into his ministrations. He only stopped to spit a wad of saliva onto your swollen slit, body shaking with sly laughter when you gasped.

“Makin’ sure you’re ready for me.” Paul teased, but it was under false pretenses — he just wanted to spit on your cunt. He didn’t hesitate, diving back in for more, assaulting your clit with a barrage of kitten-licks and gentle suckling, enough for you to sputter.

With every movement you made, Paul would simply coax you back onto his tongue with inhuman strength, lips pursing around your clit as he began to suck and toy with the sensitive bud. Your hand grappled with his coarse tresses, the other digging into his shoulder. Your nails sank into his flesh, and Paul didn’t care whatsoever.

Arousal pooled between your legs, leaving behind a sticky mess that he was all too eager to clean up. It was only when he began to use that tiny edge of teeth that you were soaring, choking on a whimper as it bubbled within the back of your throat.

Your body was screaming for release, orgasm beginning to mount and build as white-hot tension flew through you, consuming you like a tidal wave. Paul could sense it, burying himself in your pretty cunt as if it would be the last meal he’d ever have.

He switched between the eager, broad lapping of his tongue with sucking on your clit, making you claw at his shoulder blade. One hand repositioned itself, splayed out across your pelvis as his thumb slipped to the hood of your cunt, playing with your clit as the rest of his mouth lapped elsewhere.

“Paul, Paul,” Paul. It was the only word that rolled from your tongue, doing very little to mask the sound of your pleasure. With a wanton moan, you felt that hot coil of tension within your stomach begin to unfurl as you steadily reached your climax. You were suffocating him between your legs — conveniently, he didn’t need to breathe. “Fuck, Paul! M’close!”

“Cum for me,” His encouragement was all that you needed, that little push forward as he backed off, peppering kisses against your clit as you came. It was blinding, and you swore you saw stars. “That’s it,” Paul crooned, moving to clean you up. “Atta girl, baby.” He did very little to mask his eagerness in lapping up the remnants of your orgasm.

He wiped at his lips with the back of his hand, kissing his way up your body until his mouth connected with yours. You could taste yourself and the somewhat bitter twang of copper within his saliva as you let your tongue slip into his mouth. Paul groaned, grabbing at your haunches as he moved to lay beside you.

“Are you tired?” You mused, your own chest heaving with exhilarated sighs as Paul effortlessly wrangled you closer, eyes glittering with desire. You were wrong to ask that question as he raised his eyebrows.

“What kinda question is that, baby? You’re getting on top,” Paul smirked, gesturing toward his lap. His erection was practically itching for release, straining against the front of his white jeans. “You’re going for a ride.” He purred, snatching at your hips as he hoisted you on top of his lap, letting you get comfortable.

Paul lounged against the mountain of pillows beneath him, hands splayed out atop your waist. You savored the sensation of his rings biting into your flesh, and you immediately scrambled to unzip his pants, wrestling with his belt as you freed his cock. His hardened length fell against your stomach, tip oozing with a bead of precum.

You shivered, gazing down at your vampiric paramour, who stared at you with those vibrant, cerulean hues — as clear as a summer’s day. Paul tilted forward, lips reaching for yours as he planted a rather lazy, messy kiss against your mouth. “M’ready.” You murmured, feeling him lift you up as if you weighed nothing at all.

With bated breath, you felt your insides turn to mush, reigniting the spark of lust as Paul let you sink onto his cock. A fire burned bright within your belly, demanding to be extinguished as Paul’s head fell back slightly, letting out a series of groans and softer grunts. “Fuck,” He growled, feeling your palms rest against his abdomen. “You’re so fucking tight, babe.”

Liquid heat festered within the pit of your stomach as you gasped, cunt clenching around his cock as you adjusted yourself. “Paul!” You moaned, attempting to stifle the many noises you made with the back of your palm, but he quickly swatted your hand away. He was bigger than you thought he’d be — a pleasant surprise.

“Wanna hear you scream my name.” Paul huffed, rubbing circles into your hips as he began to move you. Superhuman strength and stamina certainly had roles to play in this as he guided you up and down in short, rhythmic movements. You liked that he manhandled you a little bit, one hand on your waist as the other grabbed at your chest.

A simpering moan left you as he guided you up his cock, stopping halfway before easing you back down again. Lewd noises reverberated throughout the alcove, accompanied by your sweet whimpers and his grunts and groans. You were barely given time to get used to his pattern before he was bucking up into you with the indomitable strength of a god.

There was no opportunity for you to catch your breath, watching as Paul snatched your wrists, redirecting them towards his pretty neck. That surprised you, but you didn’t protest, feeling the taut muscle tense underneath your palms, jugular bobbing as you began to squeeze.

He moaned.

Unable to bite back the smile that stretched across your features, you held onto his neck, digits flexing and tensing as you continued to apply pressure. Paul’s head fell backwards just a little bit, steadying you with one hand as he fucked into you at an erratic pace. Flesh clashed against flesh, causing you to whimper as you rolled up and down along his cock.

“You like that?” You whispered through a string of blissful whines, gaze bright with desire as he nodded several times over. “Your cock feels so good, Paul.” You huffed, teeth snagging across your lower lip as you began to let your thumbs trace along his perfect jawline. His weeks-old stubble scratched at your silken flesh.

“Little harder, girl,” Paul encouraged, wanting you to really wrangle his throat. He didn’t need to breathe anyway — that made it all the more enjoyable. He savored your hesitation — his sweet little human, afraid of harming the big, bad vampire. He smirked, lifting his eyebrows. “C’mon baby, squeeze.”

Fuck — he was going to be the death of you. Your cunt clenched and throbbed around his cock, with Paul continuing to jackhammer into you like a wild animal. Grunts and excitable groans left him in droves, rippling through his chest as you squeezed at his throat. The muscles were thick and tense underneath your small palms, slick with perspiration.

Your flesh felt dewy, especially within the oppressive heat of the cave. Paul was unstoppable, a force of nature as his hips continued to buck up, cock slamming into your poor, tight cunt. He wasn’t gentle, and he showed no signs of stopping. Delivering a sharp smack to your ass, he fillee you to the brim with his length, causing you to really grip his throat.

With a needy whimper, your eyes fluttered shut, lips parted in a state of ecstasy. “Paul,” You moaned, feeling his hand greedily knead into your chest, twisting your nipple between his thumb and forefinger. The stimulation was intensified tenfold, making your brain go fuzzy as he fucked you into a stupor. “Holy shit!”

The alcove smelled of sex — sloppy rutting that was steadily devolving into a complete mess. Paul’s precum was slathered across your inner thighs, coupled with the slick remnants of your first orgasm and current state of arousal. He stopped his erratic thrusting, sitting up a little more with one hand on your hips.

Without warning, his mouth went straight to your chest again, lips attaching themselves around one of your swollen nipples. He was sucking, grabbing a handful of your ass as he led you up and down along his cock. The warmth of your flesh intermingled with his cool, icy skin, only serving to make you sweat.

“Touch me,” You whimpered, palms still clinging to either side of his throat, nails digging in toward the nape of his neck. The sex was incredible — you’d never been fucked like this before, but he had you chasing after every sensation. “Paul, please.” Heat crawled across your flesh, leaving you drunk with desire.

Paul playfully scraped his teeth across your breast, teasing your nipple. “M’touching you already, baby.” He mumbled, propping himself up with his other hand. A simpering groan escaped you as you rocked forward, taking one hand off of his throat to play with your clit.

An impish snarl left his mouth as he snatched at your wrist, and in one erratic movement, had you pinned down on your back. His cock throbbed inside of you, desperate for a release just as much as you were. Paul cackled, lips twitching into a sneer as he began to fuck you, enough for the foundation of the mattress to rattle underneath.

“That was bad,” Paul purred, fucking you down into the plush surface, nearly pulling his cock out of your slick cunt before slamming right back in, repeating the movement over and over again. Fortunately, he was feeling generous, slipping one hand between your bodies as he found the cleft between your thighs. “Fuck, you’re soaked.” He groaned.

You clutched onto him for dear life, body responding vehemently to Paul’s erratic thrusts and uneven, primal tempo. With a loud, wanton cry, your mouth clamored to find his lips, meeting in a rather noisy clash of teeth and tongue. He circled your clit with his thumb, rutting into you with a fervor.

“Paul!” You whined, locking a leg around his hips as your nails sank into his shoulders, leaving behind angry-red impressions, embedded within his flesh. Paul encouraged your scratching, tongue lapping at the inside of your mouth. A white-hot ecstasy consumed you whole, causing you to shudder and spasm.

“Can’t hear you, baby.” Paul teased, biting at your lower lip as he peppered kisses wherever he could — greedy, wet kisses that ended up being vibrantly-colored hickeys. Your flesh was his canvas as he marked you up wherever he pleased, hyperfocused on your chest again. “You close?” He huffed, fingers tearing into the sheets.

It was exhilarating — you swore you saw stars, perhaps more as he fucked you within an inch of your life. You didn’t want him to be careful. You didn’t want him to treat you like glass — you wanted to belong to him. “M’close,” Another string of sweet, noisy moans escaped you as Paul brazenly bit at your left breast, leaving behind a crescent-shaped mark. “Close.”

Rivulets of crimson trickled across your skin, prompting Paul to lick it all away, irises shifting from cerulean to a burnished gold. It made the sex more intense as he pounded away at your poor cunt, which had certainly been pushed to the limit. He was becoming a little squirrelly, panting and growling into your ear.

Paul kissed you to distract himself from the temptation of feeding, lost within the saccharine bliss of your mouth as he felt you cum around his cock. “Yeah, baby. Go ‘head and cum for me, just like that.” He mumbled against your mouth, tongue lazily sweeping across your lower lip as he tensed and thrust forward.

He came right afterwards, reveling in the sight of you trembling and quivering, juices coating his length as he pulled out halfway through. It was messy and rather disgusting, but you didn’t care. Ropes of hot, white seed painted your stomach and breasts, which was some sort of fantasy for him.

You sighed, barely able to string a sentence together as you fell back against the mattress, coated in perspiration and his cum. “Jesus.” You uttered, pressing a palm over your face as Paul rolled over to lay next to you. Your legs twitched and spasmed as you came down from your climax, feeling something soft fall across your abdomen.

It was a rather unappealing-looking towel that seemed much too ancient, and you wondered how many times this had been used to clean up his mess. With a huff of laughter, you cleaned yourself up, feeling his arms tangle around you, urging you to come back to him.

“Makes you wish you’d taken me seriously sooner, huh?” Paul mumbled, nibbling along the shell of your ear. You couldn’t help but feel smitten afterwards, twisting over until you faced your vampiric paramour, who had the expression of the Cheshire Cat.

“You’re ridiculous,” You mused, holding his face between your palms. “You’re gorgeous, too.” A peculiar softness crept into your voice, prompting Paul to shower you in a cascade of needy kisses. He liked to be close, which you didn’t necessarily mind, despite the newfound scent of post-sex that permeated the alcove.

“I’m all yours, baby.” Paul smirked, shamelessly staring at your breasts without an ounce of subtlety. You couldn’t read his thoughts, but you suspected that he had something particular in-mind. “You’re in for a long night.” He purred, and before you could open your mouth to speak, he was crawling on top of you.

You would have to thank Marko later.

[lowkeyremi]

Haikyuu men as fathers pt 2.

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4

Ft. Kuroo, Tendou, Atsumu, and Tsukki.

Decided instead of babies I wanted to do slightly older kids! :)

CW: Indication of pregnancy, relationships, marriage and some angst for tsukki’s

Enjoy lovelies <33

…………….

Kuroo Tetsuro:

“Nap time! If my two munchkins don’t go to take a nap, the nap time monster will come out!” He hears little playful shrieks from his son and daughter.

“But Daddy, I don’t want to!” His daughter whines. A soft smile arose on his face as he bent down to his 6 year old daughter’s level. “Mommy will get mad at me if you little nuggets don’t go lay down.” Kuroo covers his eyes and pretends to cry. His son comes out of nowhere and starts trying to comfort him. “Don’t cry daddy! Umiko and me will go lay down! Come on sissy, we don’t want daddy to cry anymore.” 6 year old Shinji drags his twin sister to their room.

As soon as he’s sure they’ve turned the corner a lopsided grin appears on his face, “works every time.”

He is a dad boss no questions asked

You need a break from the kids? He’ll take them to the park and get all their energy out

For the first couple of months of their lives you would have to drag Kuroo out of their room because his 6’2” ass would get in the crib and sleep with his babies

He DEFINITELY took some time off of work to be there for you and the babies

He always makes corny dad jokes (most likely about science) “Why are chemists excellent for solving problems?” …. “They have all the solutions.”

omg he thinks his jokes are so fucking funny too (his kids learn the hyena laugh 🤦🏽‍♀️)

Whenever you’re away he always sends pictures of what he and the kids are up to.

idgaf abt what you say, that man can COOK

Tendou Satori:

“You can’t tell mom I let you have chocolate before dinner, ‘kay?” He looks into his 9 year old daughter’s eyes waiting for her response.

“It’s our little secret!” She giggles and man is laughing contagious because Tendou starts to laugh too. You were working a little later than usual so Tendou picked up Mayumi even though it wasn’t his day to do so. “What do you want for dinner, May?”

Her eyes widen at the statement. Which tells Tendou a WHOLE lot “Dad’s cooking?!” She asks not because she’s excited but because she’s scared for her life. Tendou may be a chocolatier but this man is not a very good cook unless it’s pasta.

“Nah, we’re gonna stop and get dinner before we go home. Dad’s gotta close shop though, so I thought I’d ask so we can order.”

She hops off the counter and does a cute little dance. I mean.. it’s in her genes. “You’re the best, Dad!”

He shakes his head with a smile, “oh I try!”

SO PROTECTIVE

The second he finds out someone was messing with his baby, he called the teacher and talked things out with her

He is a sucker for spoiling, you often scold him for it but he still does it anyway

He SINGS HIS DAUGHTER TO SLEEP>>>>>

He is the “ouchie” police, his daughter would always giggle but anytime she stubbed her toe on a chair or something he’d start talking to whatever caused his little girl pain and start scolding it (he knows it makes her feel better)

NOT a cook please he will burn the place by accident

Definitely ruined some intimate moments because instead of walking baby girl back to bed he gets dressed and offers to let her cuddle with you guys in the bed (after changing sheets ofc) (he wants his little girl to feel loved)

When she was a baby he’d call you every hour while he was at work to make sure you and the baby are okay

He almost passed out when the school called saying Mayumi broke her leg

He rushed her to the hospital so fast “dw baby, daddy’s here for you.” “I know it hurts princess.”

He went around interrogating the kids in her class thinking one of them pushed her, he was shocked to find out she climbed to the top of the playground and jumped off of it 😭

Definitely got his daughter obsessed with frogs

Miya Atsumu:

“Mama’s gonna kill us! What’s yer last words?” He says in slight shock. His sons start crying thinking that you were actually gonna kill them.

“Not literally boys! Just… this mess- oh jeez.” He looks around bubbles and soap all over the floor.

Atsumu told the twins to ‘be good and color ‘til papa’s done in the shower’ and he came back to this. Dawn dish soap all over the floor and bubbles galore.

The cherry on top had to be that the dog was soaking in mixed berry juice because five year old Kosuke tried to pour himself a cup of juice.

“Alright! C’mon boys, we gotta tidy up before mama gets home!” You would be home in 2 hours…

They cleaned up the bubble mess, after being distracted like 10 times and having a few bubble fights.

Next was giving the twins a bath. Which proved to be harder than it needed to be. Kosuke was mad at Kensuke because he kept showing him his butt. Honestly, Atsumu had to keep himself from laughing.

“That’s enough, Ken. Nobody want to see yer lil butt. Hurry up ‘n wash cuz papa still has to bathe Shoko.” Kensuke’s bad self is splashing water in the tub and it’s getting all over his twin. Kosuke doesn’t like it so he smacks his brother and the latter begins to cry.

“DADDY, K-KO KOSUKE HIT ME, AHHHHHHH.” Atsumu rubs his temple. He all but freezes when he feels a soft hand kneed into his shoulder.

“Seems like you guys had a great time, Shoko’s covered in juice.” He turns his head to look at you.

“it’s not what ya think, hon!” You shake your head at him.

“Ko, don’t hit your brother. When papa is being annoying you don’t see me hitting him, now do you?” He answers honestly, “sometimes you do… you’ll punch papa’s shoulder.”

He got you there lol. “Well that’s more out of love. Apologize to him and you,” you point to your little trouble maker, “don’t provoke your brother, got it?” He nods and goes to rub his eyes. Which is why he started crying for the second time because he got soap in his eyes…

Anyway after their bath and dinner the boys were sent to bed. Shoko was bathed and you and Atsumu were laying in bed.

“I shoulda been watching them..” he admits. You agree. “You live and you learn ‘Tsumu.”

He had no idea what he was doing at first tbh

he can be a bit lazy w the boys sometimes but in the end he pulls it together

The type of dad to make you sit there and say cheese for 500 years while he tries to get the perfect picture

He was mad cuz he thought the twins loved samu more than him

he was sad when they didn’t seem too interested in volleyball “Atsumu, they’re five.” … “Still!”

Impulsively bought a dog cuz his sons wouldn’t stop talking abt having one

In the end he loves his boys very much and would do anything for them

Tsukishima Kei:

“I hate you mom! I really wanted to go!” Your 13 year old daughter slammed her door. She was angry because you didn’t let her go to a dance some kid in her class was hosting. It’s not that she particularly wanted to go, she was just mad that her 17 year old brother got to go out to his friend’s party.

Your husband emerges from his office, he adjusts his glasses and looked at you with curiosity. You sigh hugging him, “Kei.. am I a bad mother?” He squeezes you in the hug, “not in the slightest. We’re doing what’s best for them. What’s got her so upset?”

“She wants to go to this party but I said no because I don’t know any of the parents there. Also, I’m just scared something will happen to her.”

He rubs your back in a comforting way. “I’ll let her go-” you interrupt, “Kei!” He gives you a quick peck to the lips.

“Wasn’t done…” you stayed quiet waiting for him to finish. He clears his throat. “As I was saying… I’ll allow her to go if I chaperone. If she doesn’t like that she won’t go.” He decided and you sigh in relief.

“I’ll go order pizza. Can you talk to her?” He nods, “Supreme.” You roll your eyes at him and smile. “I know what you like dummy.” He playfully flips you off and you laugh in shock at how childish he is even though he’s past his prime years.

He walks over to Hanae’s door and knocks softly. “Go away mom! I don’t like you!” Tsukishima shakes his head. He’s not going to tolerate her disrespecting you, the person who birthed her. He opens the door and she’s on her bed with her headphones on and dried tears on her face.

“Dad…” She already knew what was to come. She knows he doesn’t like when she disrespects you like that. “Don’t say you hate her. She’s your mother, Hanae. It hurts her to hear those words come from your mouth.” She lowers her head and takes her headphones off.

“I didn’t mean it..” her voice is small. Tsukishima handles the situation as he usually would, find the root of the problem (even though he already knew)

“What made you say it?” He sat on her bed and pat a spot next to him basically telling her to come closer. “Um.. I wanted to go to this dance a guy a know is hosting but she said no…” her eyes didn’t meet her father’s.

“Why’d you want to go so bad?” He says bringing her chin up so she looks right into his eyes. He knows she hates it but direct communication is key, even facial expressions can reveal the slightest things.

“W-well. Ugh, why am I crying this is so stupid.” She pauses to wipe her eyes.

“You guys let Akihiko go where ever he wants but I can’t go anywhere! I hate it!” She turns her head away, Tsukki can hear the little sniffles.

“Not true. A lot of stuff that he went to when he was younger, he was chaperoned. We just barely started letting him go out alone so he can get a taste of real life. You can ask him yourself. You’re only thirteen, don’t rush it. Also your mother and I just want to protect you from dangerous situations. Your mom doesn’t know any of the people there which is why she said no.” Tsukki is once again rubbing circles into someone’s back.

“There are so many bad people in the world and we just want to make you a little safer.” She turns back to face him, she scoots closer to her dad so she can hug him.

“I’m sorry.” She says through sniffles. “I’m not the one you need to apologize to.” She nods, “I need a minute.” He strokes her hair as she finishes letting it all out.

“I told your mother you can go if I chaperone you.” He explains after she’s calmed down.

“Dad, you’re gonna embarrass me.” She says with a giggle, tears now drying up.

“Damn right I will. I’ll tell all those hungry little boys that you eat your boogers and you don’t shower for weeks.” He says with a sly grin. She frowns, “dad no!”

He pats her back, “alright kid go apologize if you really mean it.” You and your daughter make up and eat pizza together :3

VERY logical

also super protective

100% the kind of dad who loves his kids but puts his wife first

He’s the bad cop parent while you’re the good cop parent

He loves family cooking night where you guys cook together

he will embarrass both his children in front of their crushes (and thinks it’s the funniest thing ever)

He just seems like the kind of dad to fall asleep and get colored on 😭 they give him a lil mustache and a uni-brow

I feel like he kinda always sides with Hanae for the most part bc he was a little sibling so he knows her pain lmao

he be bragging abt his kids “Akihiko is only six and he’s already reading flawlessly” “Oh, Hanae already did that when she was three”

you wanted to delay the sex talk but like Tsukki was so blunt and just told them 😭

He’s always teasing you “If you don’t be careful Akihiko you might end up with someone as annoying as your mom” you just glare and he snickers

Such a proud dad and has a video of every one of his kids’ firsts

[hisui-dreamer]

Okay so we've got headcanons with the twst vices tickling their S/O, now we need the reverse. How do these boys react to getting tickled?

pay attention!

Characters: Vice-dorm Leaders (Trey, Ruggie, Jade, Jamil, Ortho, Rook, Lilia)

Synopsis: When your lover isn't paying attention to you, what better way to get their attention than a tickle attack?

Tags: tickling, fluff, crack(?)

Word count: 2.1k

Notes: wooo the long awaited tickling headcanons!! sorry it took me so long to finish the series hehe, hope you enjoy it!!

Dorm Leader Vers ✧ Part 1 ✧ Masterlist

ticklish rating: 3/10

there's a new dessert Trey has been experimenting with lately, but it hasn't been easy

so recently, he's always got his nose stuck in a recipe book when you're with him

this means less cuddles and affection, which upset you a bit

as he hums in response to your questions and conversation attempts, you start to understand why he was upset the other day

but also, isn't this a perfect time for revenge?

you quietly approach him, trying to stifle your laughter, but really with how focused he was, he probably wouldn't have heard it

your fingers dance over his sides and under his arms, wriggling about to find his weak spots

but instead of laughing, he jumps and shrieks at your attack

"Huh? Woah there! What was that for, sweetcakes?"

you continue trying to find a ticklish spot but his face remains confused, smiling wryly at your antics

oh dear, it turns out he's not ticklish at all???

the recipe book is long forgotten at this point, but now you just want to get a reaction out of him

so begins you trying to tickle all spots that you can think of, while he sits still and watches as you experiment around

you try drawing gentle circles with your finger onto his palm

he lets out a laugh at your soft caresses

!!! HE HAS SENSITIVE HANDS!!!

Trey's eyes widen in surprise as your fingers flutter gently on his palm. His initial confusion is quickly replaced with a soft chuckle and a look of wonder. "Okay, wait, that felt slightly ticklish," he admits.

But he immediately regrets admitting that to you, because the next second you're doubling your efforts to make him laugh. He tries to fend off your tickles, but you're determined to gain his attention.

"Okay, okay, you win!" he gasps between laughs. "I guess I deserved that. You got my attention, all right." He sighs in relief when your fingers pull back, "Now then, will it be better if we study the book together?"

ticklish rating: 9/10

you can't really blame Ruggie for always being busy and not having enough time for you

he's consistently on the move, managing errands and making the most out of every opportunity

but on some days he's just so busy that you can only see glimpses of him or he's just that focused that he can't even see you

unfortunately, today is one of those days

ruggie has zipped past you no less than three times, each time running a different errand, buying Leona lunch, picking dandelions, among other tasks

so by the next time you see him, you've already formulated a plan to get his attention

he's in his PE uniform this time, and once you manage to grab onto his shirt to stop him, you reach out and start tickling him, just like he did to you the other day

Ruggie yelps in surprise and laughter "Wha- It's you- Wait- Shyahahaha! What the-?"

he tries to squirm away but can't help but laugh, especially as you start tickling his ears

his tough exterior melts away into the infectious hyena laughter that you love

thank goodness you attacked him in a secluded area, his pride would've been so hurt otherwise

Ruggie erupts in a burst of laughter, losing his grip on the stack of books he's lugging. His ears perk up, and his tail thrashes excitedly as he attempts to evade your tickling fingers.

He turns to face you with wide grey eyes, a mix of confusion, shock, and amusement on his face. "Hey, what's the big idea?" he grumbles, though there's a playful glint in his eyes that can't be denied.

"Oh jeez, I didn't realise I was that busy..." he mutters with a tinge of guilt. "Alright, meet me in Savanaclaw at 5! I promise I'll make it up to ya!" He says determined. He places a quick peck on your lips, before running off to another task once again.

ticklish rating: 2/10

it's another hectic day in octavinelle, azul has big plans to boost sales through some new marketing tactic

and this of course means that Jade has become incredibly busy with these plans

normally you would greatly enjoy watching your beloved in his business mode, with polite smiles as he greeted customers, effortless smooth gestures as he glided across the room which would melt into genuine, loving glances when he turned to you

but this time, you really did need to talk to him about your new terrarium and how it looked more and more dead by day

but each time, before the question could even escape your lips, another errand in need of the vice-housewarden's help magically appears

so you took the chance to tackle him when he went into the supply closet (knowing he would not appreciate being dishevelled in public), fingers wriggling around his sides to try to make the fearsome eel crumble in laughter

but instead, he's completely silent, just his pair of mismatched eyes wide open, curiously focused on you

a wry smile forms on his face as he says teasingly, "My, I regret to inform you my pearl, but moray eels are immune to tickling,"

you freeze at his words. uh oh

Before you can even react, he swiftly sweeps you off your feet and carries you toward the VIP room. "Oh dear, I've been a terrible lover, haven't I? It appears I'll have to neglect my responsibilities for a bit..." he sighs, his brows knitted with concern. He continues in a hushed tone, leaning in to whisper in your ear, "Though I admit I would prefer to remain by your side as well,"

"Hm...?" He hums, his lips curving into a mischievous smile as you nuzzle into his neck, concealing your face. "Are my kisses ticklish, perhaps?" He pauses, then continues with a teasing tone, "Well, I suppose it's only fair, considering my dearest pearl has initiated an attack as well."

"By all means, I'd like to see you find my ticklish spots. Though you must be prepared, love, there is no deed I would not return," he grins mischievously, thoroughly enjoying how flustered you are.

ticklish rating: 9/10

it's not surprising your lover doesn't always have time for you

ever the dutiful servant, Jamil works every second of his life to serve kalim in every sense of life

it's something you'd long accepted since being in a relationship with him, but you can't deny you find yourself feeling lonely when he prepares feast after feast for scarabia

plus you know he likes it when you're selfish and want to monopolise his attention

you find your beloved standing by a large pot of stew on the stove, unfazed by your presence

you try calling out to him, but he's completely unresponsive Jamil are you okay

you tickle his sides for a bit, trying to gauge a reaction, but he instantly jumps and squeals "AHHHH! WHA-"

whoops turns out he's really ticklish

he relaxes when he sees it's you, and automatically starts leaning onto you, the fatigue weighing his body down

maybe you shouldn't tickle him too much for now

"I'm sorry I've been so busy lately, I just want to make everything perfect for Scarabia," he murmurs, a faint smile gracing his lips as he nuzzles into your embrace. "But I'm so grateful you're here. I missed you too."

"Really? Are you sure you don't mind helping out?" He looks up at you with those warm, expressive eyes, his gratitude evident. "Thanks... I really appreciate it,"

His hands find yours, clasping them gently. He leans his forehead against yours as he whispers, "I promise. I'll make more time for us, I swear."

ticklish rating: ???

Rook can always find beauty in everything and anything, so it's not unusual for him to be distracted

though you sometimes do wish you were the only one he would have his eyes on

but you wouldn't change him for the world, because his delight in even simple details is so infectious you can't help but want to stay by his side and listen to him rant on and on

still, that doesn't stop you from getting jealous of the person at the centre of his attention, mainly from magazines about a certain actor in RSA

so you decided to get his attention by tickling him, because maybe it could surprise your ever-careful hunter?

your fingers lightly danced along his sides, staring as his watchful eyes directed their gaze towards you

"Trickster! Oh dear, I'm quite ticklish!"

...so he says, but he's hardly flinching away from your touch at all

you try shifting your hands to other sensitive areas, but his lips simply curl into an affectionate smile, and he gently clasps your hands

you're not sure if he's lying or not, but you definitely have his attention now

"Oh là là! How daring of you, Trickster! To sneak up on a hunter like myself... Beauté! Your boldness is very attractive!" Rook exclaims, his eyes twinkling teasingly.

"Mon cœur, you always find the most charming ways to capture my attention," Rook says, his voice filled with tenderness. "But if it's my attention you seek, you have it, my darling, always."

"Now, is there something you would like to do in the moment?" he asks, gently planting a soft kiss on the back of your hand. "Personally, I wouldn't mind losing myself in your eyes..."

ticklish rating: 0-7/10

it started off really simple, Ortho was just busy researching new strats for idia to try in a newly released game

but the game was open-world, so there was a lot of information to sift through

so in a light-hearted attempt to get his attention, you tried tickling him

only you forgot he's not ticklish at all

"Huh? What's wrong? Why are tickling me? I'm not ticklish at all," he asks, tilting his head in confusion

you laugh as you explain it's just a fun thing friends do, but you've only made him more interested

he goes back to idia that night, asking him about friends and tickling

sure, big bro's not the best person to ask when it's about friendships, but he tries his best with his anime knowledge

and so ortho now wants a tickle response system so he can simulate being like real friends! and who is idia to deny him

the next day, ortho runs up to you excitedly

"Prefect! Go ahead, tickle me!" Ortho's voice rings out with excitement, his eyes shimmering like a pair of bright stars in the night sky.

Confused, you hesitantly reach out to tickle his sides like you did the day before. He instantly erupts in laughter, "Ahahaha! I'm ticklish now! It's a success!"

"How is it? Doesn't this make me more like a real boy now? We can have tickle flights now!" he exclaims. "My brother is so amazing!"

ticklish rating: 2/10

as much as you loved Lilia, you physically could not love his cooking

though that sentiment could be shared by many, even silver and sebek

so it's not uncommon for you to be called in to distract Lilia from whatever dish he has set his mind on mutilating

whatever distraction you come up with, it must be surprising and fun, he's notorious for brushing aside feeble attempts, determined to perfect his culinary concoctions

so, why not try tickling him?

this time, he's trying to remake a lemon tart he had sampled many years ago in his travels

though you're not sure what's compelling him to add pepper to the lemon curd (to give it more flavour he says...)

but as usual, the recipes aren’t nearly nutritious enough!

as he's scavenging around for 'nutritious ingredients' to add to the mix, you sneak close to him and start your attack, wriggling your fingers at his neck

"Ahaha! My dear, what's the matter?" He laughs gently, turning around to face you

but before you can even react, he's got both you hands pinned above your head, a devilish grin on his face

"Playing such tricks on an old man like me? You youngsters always trying to keep me on my toes, I see." he hums thoughtfully. "Though I suppose this means it's only fair if I return the favour, khehehe..."

His hands dance around your sensitive areas, his eyes keen on your reactions. With a wry, knowing grin, he asks, "Oh? It seems you're quite ticklish here?" A mischievous twinkle dances in his eyes. "Don't complain now, you're the one who tried to attack this poor defenseless fae."

By the time he pulls back, you're gasping for breath. "Now then," he inquired with a soft voice, "what prompted this sudden onslaught, dearest?" His fingers, tender as they grazed your hair, emitted a comforting warmth. "If you wanted my attention, I would have gladly given it to you."

Dorm Leader Vers ✧ Part 1 ✧ Masterlist

if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!

[spinderella-umbrella]

@wolfstarmicrofic | Rictusempra | 450 words

Sirius is an idiot, who forgot his collar bones were covered in hickies that he had refused to let Remus heal. An idiot who couldn’t apparently wait to get to the private bathroom to get changed. Now James wouldn’t let up on finding out who gave them to him.

“So what’ll it be, Pads? Tell us of your own volition or suffer the consequences,” James smirks devilishly, waggling his fingers in front of him in a tickling motion from across the room.

But even the threat of James making him laugh like a hyena with a well cast rictusempra won’t make him tell. Sirius shakes his head, lips pressed tightly together.

“You asked for it—“ James says, twirling his wand. “Rictusempra!” He casts, and Sirius closes his eyes, bracing himself for impact. But it doesn’t come— instead, a small crack in front of him indicates that a shield had been cast to block the spell.

His eyes fly open just as James shouts, “Hey what gives Moony!”

Sirius’ eyes follow James’ line of sight to Remus, who hasn’t even looked up from his book.

“He doesn’t like being tickled.” Remus says flatly. Sirius sees his wand still in his hand as he turns the page.

“Which makes it the perfect way to get information out of him!” James argues.

Remus raises a brow, and looks up, amber eyes glittering in the low light. “By torturing him?”

James gawks, mouth opening and closing, unable to think of what to say. Sirius is glad no one’s looking at him, because he’s red as a tomato. After moments of fumbling, he says quietly, “I just wanted to know. We tell each other everything.” James turns to Sirius then, his expression crestfallen. “Who is so important that you can’t tell me?”

Sirius deflates, hanging his head. “I’m sorry Prongs. They’re not—“

“It was me.” Remus interrupts, Sirius’ head snapping up to gape at him.

“What?!” James shrieks, and Sirius winces, but he’s focused on Remus, his boyfriend, who has set down his book and opened his arms to Sirius.

He doesn’t hesitate, dashing across the room and sliding onto the bed, slotting into Remus’ side. The place he has made his home. His eyes are still on Remus, and finally, Remus’ challenging glare leaves James and turns to Sirius.

“Hi,” Sirius says dumbly.

“Hi,” Remus smiles at him, tucking his hair behind his ear.

“Are you seeing this wormtail?” James shouts gleefully. “Moony and Padfoot! Look at them! Oh this is the best day.”

Remus snorts, and Sirius buries his head into his shoulder, Remus leaning down to rest his cheek on his head. “Love you.” He whispers, feeling Remus’ smile against his hair.

[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

Request: Short or Long if you want; but the Great 7 reaction to Overblot in this world and their counterparts Overblot?

The Blots vs The Seven

Only did the one available in the en version

Riddle Rosehearts/The Queen of Hearts

Horrific ink-stained roses formed from the strange blot that surrounded Riddle. As he floats up, ink overtakes him, giving him a new form. An ink covered dress went over his usual clothes, a black simmering crown rested on his head, and even more disturbing was the creature that seemed to lurk behind him.

[What is that?] The Queen of Hearts asks, horrified within your head. The ink monster took form, its inky figure taking on the likeness of the queen within your head. Its inky dress was patchy and its head was replaced with a glass heart, filled with a black substance. You swallowed and held your ground, getting into position to dodge an attack Riddle and that strange monster would throw at you.

You could feel the Queen of Hearts rage build within you, before disgust overtook. [What a horrific mockery of me!] The queen yells within your mind. [Rose, destroy it at once!] She commands, and then with a softer voice she whispers under her breath. [But be careful]

Leona Kingscholar/Scar

[Be prepared, cub] Scar snarled in your head as he glared at the sight in front of you, ink encompassing Leona and engulfing him whole before he emerged. With him a four-legged inky monster hovered around him before standing to the side of him.

It’s tail flickered side to side as the lionesque screature let out a shriek. [And strike him down.] Scars voice was eerily calm, his face showed pure focus and nothing more. You couldn’t help but obey as the cackle of hyenas in your head laughed maniacally as they emerged, ready to fight with you.

Azul Ashengrotto/Ursula and the Eels

Ursula's face dropped at the sight. [Careful Angelfish, a cornered octomer can become quite dangerous…] You know she must be speaking from experience by the tone of her voice. [Boss! He’s transforming!] The eels whispered

Before your eyes, the man emerged from ink, tendrils swaying in a deadly rhythm. Behind him, another Octomer emerged, warped, and twisted into the image of your mother. The seven whispered amongst themselves as the creature lifted its trident. [That's it, get ready boys, were taking this thing down.]

Jamil Viper/Jafar

“I WILL BE FREE!” You pitied Jamil as he blotted. He was absolutely right for it too. He did deserve to be free, to no longer serve Kalim. What was terrifying is how absolutely right he was. Even more terrifying is how similar his story was to your fathers. Should you… Should you let him win? [No, child.] Jafar speaks in your mind. [He will die in this state.]

You could only stare as he transformed into a form eerily similar to you father, along with a new monster emerging from behind dressed exactly like him, the only difference being the inky bottle that makes up its head. [Defeat him, diamond. And free him.]

Vil Shoenheit/Queen Grimhilde.

[Is that supposed to be… me?] The feminine voice sneered with disdain. The beautiful man before you floated amongst the ink that surrounded him, the monster behind him holding him up as it snarled at you.

[What a mockery!] The Evil Queen spoke coldly as she stared down the beast that was nearly an exact clone of her body, with a terribly warped face. [Child, I demand you destroy them at once for their insolence!] She tutted, [And because they dare to threaten you as well…]

[thedvilsinthedetails]

wrote a quick, just fluff, slice of life microfic w rosekiller (679 words)

wrote it pretty quickly so the description is #entirelynonexistant

Oh for the record ‘grunkle ford’ is a gravity falls character bahaha

also ten things I hate about you I LOVE THAT MOVIE thats the literal only reason I have them watching it is just bc I love it lmao

CW: reference to background sexual stuff but nothing depicted (its Barty btw bc Evan is ace in this)

Evan got back home at around seven, rain soaked and shivering from shitty London weather. He leaned against the door with a sigh, throwing an angry glance at the umbrella he’d decided he wouldn’t need today and left in the doorway this morning. Then he heard it. 

Barty softly groaning from the bathroom, then a gasp and then…

“E-Evan!”

Then silence. 

Evan just chuckled, sitting himself down on the sofa, smirking bemusedly when Barty emerged a minute later from the bathroom. 

“Having fun?”

Evan joked. Barty stuck his tongue out his boyfriend. 

“I tried to do it before you got home.”

“Don’t worry it’s fine, I don’t mind hearing it. I mean I kind of like the fact that you think of me when you…I just don’t want to do it.”

Barty’s smile softened and he reached his hands out to cup Evan’s face. Evan hesitated, moving his head back for a second.

“Sorry just…you’ve washed your hands like a lot right?”

“Course baby. Hands cleaned thoroughly with scented soap.”

Evan relaxed and let Barty’s hands slip around his face. Barty leaned down and pressed a kiss gently on the top of his head, nestling his face in Evan’s hair for a moment.

“Just so you know though.”

Barty whispered softly in Evan’s hair.

“I may have said your name but I was actually thinking of Grunkle Ford. Ultimate DILF.”

Barty chuckled before dropping his hands and running to the kitchen, giggling at Evan’s indignant expression.

“First of all. RUDE. second of all, he’s a literal old man.”

Evan chased Barty quickly with a laugh.

Barty just shrugged, turning and pulling Evan into his arms. They swayed there for a moment, holding each other in the soft glow of the kitchen light. Barty curled his head against Evan’s chest, looking up at him with soft eyes. 

“DILFS only improve with age.”

“Barty!”

Barty laughed again. He had a strange laugh, one that alternated between complete gaping silence and something that resembled a hyena’s shriek. It warmed Evan up from inside out to hear. 

“How was your day?”

Evan pressed their foreheads together gently as he asked.

“It was good, boring. You?”

“Same. Wanna watch a movie?”

“Ten things I hate about you, ten things I hate about you, ten things I hate about you…”

Barty began to chant it, dancing around the kitchen excitedly as Evan got snacks for the movie ready. Evan threw a handful of pretzels at him at one point which Barty tried and failed to catch in his mouth. In the end he just picked them up off the floor, blew on them (like that would even do anything) and shoved them in his mouth. 

•••

They were curled up on their sofa, Barty had his back pressed against Evan’s chest, one hand resting on Evan’s knee. Evan had an arm slung over Barty’s shoulder, other one wrapped around his waist. Evan tried to focus on the movie but it was sort of difficult when Barty kept throwing Evan not so subtle glances. 

“What is it baby?”

Evan murmured. Barty’s eyes widened and he dropped his gaze quickly. He took his hand off Evan’s knee and began to rub his knuckles against one another nervously.

“Bee?”

Evan asked again, hugging him just slightly tighter. 

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Hey.”

Evan whispered.

“You don’t have to tell me but I won’t judge you or anything.”

Barty glanced up at him again. He drew in a shaky breath before speaking.

“I’ve been thinking recently, you know about us. And I didn’t know what it was but I just figured it out and well…look I think I love you. I know I love you.”

He blurted it out quickly, tripping over words as he spoke. Evan just froze slightly.

“Oh.”

Barty shifted awkwardly, eyes fixed down in his hands.

“I love you t-“

“Ev you don’t have to…”

“Bee.”

Evan pressed a soft kiss against Barty’s cheek.

“I love you too.”

Barty looked at him for a moment, then hummed happily, snuggling even closer to Evan. 

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I've been dreaming of the Savanna Cleaner.

Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat well for a day. Teach a man how to fish, and he’ll never go hungry.

He'll clean up his plate, and the town along the way.

How does a moment last forever? How can a story never die?

He's up before the first crack of light hits the horizon. When the sun makes itself known, Ruggie is already halfway across town.

Sneaking is a specialty of his, learned from a young age. He darts along the savanna, quick as a whip, even when he's balancing several large containers. Their contents are as precious as gold.

His shadow ducks into alleyways and behind homes, hugging the darkness as the sun seeks him out. It was here where he would hide, waiting for easy pickings: gullible people to relieve of their wallets, rotten or meager scraps of food no one but the truly desperate desired.

Those days are long behind him now.

He passes a schoolhouse, a library, a park and a playground. All shiny and new, bearing shiny plaques. They had sprouted up years back, paid off by some generous benefactor. To liven up this place, they had said.

His destination appears along the road ahead. It's a building, simple and squat, with a similar plaque hanging by the entrance.

[The Sunbeam Community Center]

{Donated by Ruggie Bucchi}

He sneaks around, producing a hairpin from the breast pocket of his vest. A tool of his trade. Setting his containers down, Ruggie kneels and jiggles the pin around in the lock of the back door.

A minute later, and the door swings open without a problem. He enters, containers and all, placing them on the first free counter he spots. The instant his hands are freed up, a band of shrieks erupts from somewhere in the sun-streaked room.

“Get’im!!”

Small bodies rush at him from every direction, bursting out of cabinets and from behind furniture. They cling to his limbs, grip at his clothes, squealing for attention. Ruggie careens this way and that, body swaying from the extra weight thrown on top of him.

"Alright, alright," he groans, "I get it, you little brats! Get offa me already! How's a hyena supposed to get anything done like this?!"

"Awww, do we HAVE to?" one boy whines.

"But we haven't seen you in forever, Ruggie-nii!" a girl complains. "You're so busy with your fancy big-bucks job that you can't hang out as much as you used to."

"Yes, now off or no treats! We gotta fill our stomachs first before playing, right?"

At the promise of food, the children scrambled off of him. They collect in a sizable pack, all staring up at Ruggie with wide eyes.

Heh, always does the trick. He knows--at one point, he had been in their shoes.

"That's better." Ruggie adjusts his crooked shirt, then eyes the slum kids and street rats. Grimy, thin, sickly--that is how he remembers them. Now they've filled out a little more, their outfits well-fitting and clean. Some of them have a restored ruddiness to their cheeks, or a sheen to their tails.

Receiving the basic necessities tended to do that.

"Anyway, how'd you guys get in before the staff did? They must all still be snoozin' in their cots."

"Picked the lock," the kids chant.

"Then we hid and waited to ambush our prey!"

"... Great Seven, guess I'm a bad influence after all," Ruggie confesses. Tsk. They beat me to the punch. I was gonna be the one to surprise them. He doesn't linger for too long on it. "Eh, whatever. My conscience is light. Since you're all here, you might as well help me prep for tonight’s soup kitchen services."

"Whaaat? You said we'd eat first!"

"Yeah, eating and then playing!"

A slow, mischievous smile spreads on his face. "Huh, did I say that?"

"You diiiiid!"

He laughs. "Yeah, yeah. Don't worry, I didn't forget." Ruggie slapped a hand on one of the main containers he had bought in. "Here's your surprise--had Granny help me whip'm up."

"Thanks for the grub!"

The children clamor, greedy hands sticking out to snatch up rings of fried dough--perfectly golden, crisp exterior and fluffy interior. Some were dipped in chocolate, others iced in sugar glaze or coated in a fine powder. The toppings varied greatly, from crushed nuts to rainbow sprinkles and freeze-dried fruits.

One donut after another is wolfed down, fingers growing increasingly sticky from the indulgence.

"Oi, oi, eat that fast and you'll get bellyaches!" Ruggie warns. "And save some for me, I'm hungry too!!"

He makes a dive for one, capturing it before a child's nipping teeth do. The hyena sighs before popping it into his mouth and breaking off a piece. He's still chewing when one of the kids pipes up.

"I'm jealous, Ruggie-nii! You get to eat yummy stuff like this every day and swim in a pool full of gold and jewels and thaumarks."

Swim in a pool full of gold, jewels, and thaumarks? Is that what they think the mega-rich do for fun...?

"Nishishishishi, I wouldn't say that--but it's definitely a way cushier life than what I had before." He absentmindedly licks off granules of sugar from his thumb and goes in for another bite.

Ruggie thinks of his grandmother--sweet Granny Bucchi, who speaks with a stutter and needs assistance shuffling from her bed to the front door. She's getting up there in age, but never lost her fierce spark.

At least she can live comfortably in retirement now.

"... Yeah, definitely a cushier life than before," he remarks.

"You have buildings with your name on it too!" another child says. "They only do that when you give a lotta lotta LOTTA money! I want a building named after me too."

"’N you still visit us," a third adds, "to give us gifts 'n stuffs."

Ruggie finishes off his donut and shrugs. “What else am I gonna do with my cash, burn it?”

I wouldn’t turn my back on this place and take off into the sunset.

He had been poor, but he had also been happy here in spite of that. Long days watching Granny work her magic in their decrepit kitchen, sharing scraps and tricks to the local troublemakers, making up games that didn’t need tools or money. Those were precious memories, forever immortalized in amber.

He crams a second donut into his mouth.

Man, when’d I get so sentimental?

“I wanna be just like you when I grow up, Ruggie-nii. How can I be like you?”

“I wanna know too!”

“Me too, me too!”

“C’mon! Pretty please tell us?”

Ruggie swallows. "Okay, squirts. You wanna know the real secret to success? Clean the gunk outta your ears and listen up.”

The kids leaned in, ears perked and bobbing their heads eagerly.

Ruggie pretends to look both ways, then leans in as well, making a show of dramatizing his announcement. "… You eat well, play hard, and work and study even harder! That way, you can make your own bright futures and keep spreading the wealth~”

“Aw, we have to study?”

“That’s what the school and the library’s for. Can’t live off of money taken from the pockets of rich folks—you gotta sustain yourself, cuz I might not always be here.”

“Really?”

“Really, really.” Ruggie points out of the window, and to a sky brightening with sunshine. “One day, I’ll be a star too. Then it’s all up to you guys to send the same message to the next litter that comes along. One story from this generation to the next, and then to the one after…”

It’s how they tell stories in the slums, when they were too poor for paper and pencils. They had only words and the voices that spin them.

“… Oh, right. Speaking of that, how are you guys doing with your homework? I know you just started recently and it’s kinda tough getting into it.”

“Errr…” The kids worriedly glance at one another. Ruggie’s suspicions sharpen—this experience, so reminiscent of hunting down his dorm leader for missing assignments.

“You have been doing it, right?”

No one is brave enough to offer an answer. One girl at the head of the group blurts out, “Run!!” and sends the children into a frenzied panic.

They race for the exit, but Ruggie is quicker. He blocks the door and playfully snaps his teeth.

“Think you can escape?” A flash his teeth. “Try me.”

He’s having too much fun to let it be over this soon.

[blackcherryvelvet0909]

Waking Prince (Silver x GN!Reader)

There were many things to see, to find, along the golden beach. Your eyes took in every sight laid out before you across the sandy landscape. Little figures clamored around Sam’s snow cone stand to purchase one of those cold, delicious treats. Grim, Ace, and Deuce were right where you left them, sprawled out on separate towels, taking in the sun as they took a break from swimming. In that great blue sea were various fellow students - from first to third years - going about their own funny business; you watched two in particular, one with the ears of a hyena and the other with fair lavender hair, jumping into the cool water from a large rock. You released a small giggle as the latter let out a small shriek from the cold as his head rose above the waves. As your gaze wandered to the left, you took in the sight of a head resting upon the sand…wait, what?! 

You had to do a double take to realize just what you saw. Below you was Silver - at least what you could see of him. From the neck down the second year was covered in sand, a pair of round lumps formed where his chest would be. Silver slept peacefully where he lay, blissfully unaware of how the rest of him had been buried alive. There was no sense in leaving him like that; if you didn’t wake him, someone not as kind might come along and make the situation worse. So, you took a few steps over and knelt beside the young man’s head. You gently tapped his cheek with the pad of your finger as you tried to coax him out of dreamland. 

“Silver? Silver, wake up.” 

In an instant, those aurora colored orbs shot wide open. Though you kept the volume of your voice to a minimum, you still somehow startled him. Silver turned his head to look at you, expression scrunched in confusion. “...[Y/n]? Is there something you need?” 

“No, not really.” You pointed down at his torso. “It’s just that someone decided to play a prank on you while you slept.” 

Silver’s eyebrows furrowed as he looked down at the rest of him. What met his vision was not his pale skin, but grains of sand - part of them which were formed into two large lumps just below his neck. Well, he certainly knew what those were meant to represent. Silver slowly sat up from his place on the ground, both of you watching as the feminine facade slowly slid off his body. The man let out a sigh as he shook his head, mild frustration lining his tone. “Father, why must you do this?” Silver mumbled to himself in a hush. It was obvious he had not meant for you to hear, but you were close enough to make out the words. 

“Lilia did this?” you asked. 

“I do not believe Sebek, nor Lord Malleus, would partake in such tricks.” 

He had a point. That, and who knew Lilia better than his own son? Well, probably Malleus - you wondered if he witnessed this. If he did, he certainly didn’t stop Lilia from blanketing his son in sand. Though it was a little immature, especially with the touch of breasts, you’re sure Sebek would have gotten enjoyment out of it, too. You doubted anyone else would try and wake Silver (except Kalim, but he was out in town at the moment), so there he lay for however long he’d been sleeping. You were glad you came along when you did. 

“How long have you been asleep?” 

“I’m…not sure.” Silver’s lips downturned as he tried to think. “I…It couldn’t have been more than an hour. I’m glad I put sunscreen on when I did,” Silver breathed a sigh, “I doubt I’d hear the end of it if my face caught a sunburn.” 

Silver described it like it was an illness…fair enough, you thought. Might as well be for how annoying a sunburn was, let alone painful. Silver stood from his place on the sand as he tried to wipe any remaining grains from his skin and trunks. As he shook his head this way and that, little specks of sand falling to the ground, you couldn’t help but stare. You knew Silver had a pretty face - those gorgeous aurora eyes were just the icing on the cake. His handsome physique, however, was nothing to gawk at. You’d never paid much attention to his figure, his visage, in the past, but now…

Silver brushed some stray strands of hair away from his face as he opened those eyes again. Wrapped around his wrist was a bracelet made of braided brown leather; a small, metallic pendant dangled down by a thick black string, catching the sun’s rays just right for it to shine. When Silver’s gaze met yours, you couldn’t help your curiosity. “Is the bracelet new?” 

Silver glanced down at the jewelry on his wrist. “Ah, yes, it is. When fa- Lilia and-”

“I don’t mind you calling him ‘father’ around me,” you said with a smile. “I mean, I know you don’t like to around others, but since I know, and there’s no one else around, you…could, if you want to.” You shrunk in on yourself when you uttered those final words. Were you being too forward - rude, even? Silver could call his father whatever he wanted, it wasn’t your choice to-

The little smile that twitched at Silver’s lips was breathtaking. The chuckle that laid just under his words was just as lovely. “Yes, I suppose it is a bit unnecessary, since we are alone.” Those beautiful orbs locked gazes with yours. “Forgive me?” 

“For what?” You couldn’t help but let out a little laugh of your own. “You can call your dad whatever you want! It isn’t up to me…but I am happy you’re comfortable enough with me to talk about him in such a way.” 

Silver gave you a small, grateful nod. He then wiped some sweat that had developed on his brow - yet another handsome display, you thought. He spared you a glance as he said, “It’s hotter than it was before I fell asleep. I believe it’s because the sun is at its peak in the sky.” Silver gestured at a towel, shadowed by a large umbrella and laden with personal objects. “If you would allow me to grab my wallet, shirt, and sandals, I could get you a drink.” 

“You don’t have to do that for me,” you assured with a small shake of your head, now knelt on your knees, about to stand. “I can get some water from the cooler I left with Ace and Deuce.” If there’s any left, you grumbled in your head. 

“No, please, let me treat you.” That smile was back, a little brighter this time around. Silver was so effortlessly handsome, it was almost unfair! “You came to wake me out of concern for my previous state; there is no telling who else might have come if not you.” There was a slight waver in his expression when he said that. You could only imagine who he might be referring to - you had a few ideas. Silver quickly shooed that thought from his mind as he turned his attention back to you. 

“I would like to repay you for your kindness…and, if it’s not too bold of me, I’ve been wanting to spend time with you.” His smile seemed almost shy now. “Would you be interested?” 

You could take me anywhere and I’d follow with a ‘thank you.’ That’s what you wanted to say, but you held yourself back. Instead, you smiled as you hopped to your feet and said, with a bit more enthusiasm than you intended, “I’d love to! I’ve been wanting to spend time with you, too.”

The sigh that whispered under Silver’s amused chuckle sounded like one of relief. “Thank you.” He turned to walk to the little setup under the umbrella (no doubt the one he shared with Lilia, Sebek, and Malleus), but not without parting from you with a, “I’ll only be a moment.” 

“No rush,” you mumbled as he went to get his things. You caught yourself staring at his back as he walked away; how broad his shoulders were, how those built biceps led to gentle, yet just as strong hands. It seemed every single part of Silver, son of Lilia Vanrouge, was sculpted by gods. As handsome as a fairytale prince, you thought. “Man, just one chance…” 

“Hm?” Silver looked over his shoulder at you, just as he pulled his shirt over his head. “Did you say something?” 

Well, apparently that thought slipped out of your mouth without your notice. “N-Nope, nothing!” You internally cursed yourself for the stutter. 

Thankfully, Silver seemed to buy it. You watched as he slipped on his sandals and pocketed his wallet, then came back over to you. “Ready?” he asked.

“Mhm!” Before you could step in line beside Silver, you watched as he bent his arm at the elbow. You couldn’t help but be confused as he nodded down at it. “What?” 

“I am offering you my arm,” Silver stated simply, as though it were something one did without thinking. “Father has taught me to offer mine since I was young.” He tilted his head to the side. “Is it not custom for a man to offer his arm to the one he’s escorting in these lands?” 

Good Seven, the strong urge to kiss this natural born Prince Charming on the mouth. You thought to thank Lilia later. Before Silver could get the wrong idea, you grinned and wrapped your arm around his bicep. “I think so - I just don’t get it often. Thank you, Silver.” You giggled as you added, “You make me feel special~” 

“You are to me.” The way Silver looked at you as he breathed those words…you might have fainted if he didn’t catch himself a second later. His cheeks burst into a pink color, clearly embarrassed. This time, you decided to spare him the trouble of an explanation. 

“Did you say something?” you asked, feigning innocence, like you hadn’t heard those little words that currently sent your heart into a fluttering fit. 

Silver shook his head as he avoided your eye. “N-No.” He began to walk forward, and you stepped in line with him. “Where would you like to go?” 

Though the two of you began to chat like normal, there was this newfound tension in the air. It wasn’t bad…it was fuzzy, warm, sweet. The weight of words currently left unsaid. You hoped you might be able to coax them out of your friend soon - hopefully. You don’t know how much more your heart can take before you take the reins and sweep this prince off his feet first. 

Either way, you were sure a certain fae would be delighted with the news.

[minnielvrr]

New Discovery

Lee: Minho Ler: Chan, Han Word Count: 2k

A/N: This is from this poll. Okay so I got a liiittle carried away with this🤭sorry if there are any spelling mistakes😅 Hope you enjoy~~🤗💖💞🩷

It had been a couple of days since Skz discovered that Minho didn’t know what tickling was. Being an only child meant that some of the experiences that might seem like second nature to people with siblings, were a whole new territory for him.

Chan stalked his prey from afar, spying on an oblivious Lino who was busy washing some dishes in the sink. He managed to sneak into the kitchen, somehow not getting found out by his target. The leader waited until Lino set down the glass he was washing, reaching to the side to grab a large metal saucepan, to set his plan in motion. Stealthily, he crept up on the kitten and quickly shoved his hands into the boy’s armpits.

Multiple things happened in the moment that followed. Minho choked on a gasp before screaming bloody murder, jerking away from Chan and dropping the saucepan onto the floor with a loud thud. Then, almost simultaneously, his knees buckled, the unfamiliar sensation sending shockwaves through his body that weakened him significantly. “Oh, you suhuhrprised meheheHEHE! CHAN HYUHUHUNG!!”

Ah, so Minho was sensitive sensitive. Chan had half expected the younger to swat him away. This was going to be so much fun! The leader eased the struggling kitten onto the kitchen floor, his legs framing the younger’s body and fingers still wiggling into soft skin. Minho was giggling crazily when the younger members rushed to the scene of the commotion.

Everyone was concerned and scared… up until Han giggled and pointed a finger at where the leader’s hands disappeared under Lino’s sweater. The second oldest was kicking his feet now, arms clamped tightly to his sides as he borrowed deeper into Chan’s embrace, hoping the strange sensations would go away.

Chan changed spots fast, looking for a satisfying reaction. He knew he would find one, given Minho’s initial response. It was just a matter of time. From Minho’s tummy, to his neck, ribs, while blowing into his ears the whole time. The poor kitten was going insane, twisting away from one hand only to be met with another on a worse spot. There was no reprieve.

“Hyung! Whahahat are youhu dohohoHOHOING?!” His whines turned to shrieks when the oldest moved his hands downwards, now kneading his lower ribs between nimble fingers that had Minho screaming out frantic laughter.

“Plehehease STAHAHAHAHAAHAAP!!” He begged, writhing against the kangaroo’s strong body and finding no escape. “You really don’t know what’s happening right now do you hyung?” Jeongin asked in wonder, eyes wide as he took in his hyung’s giggly form. “I’m tickling you Linoyaaa~. Does it feel good?~” Chan paused, noticing how the kitten’s responses were simmering down.

Something about hearing the word said out loud made him suddenly feel so vulnerable and seeing no other way to hide his reddening face, Lino shoved it his hands. But the red tips of his ears gave away everything he tried to hide from them and showed everyone how much just hearing the word affected him.

And the teasing…the teasing just made everything so much worse.

The break he got was almost as bad as the thing Chan was doing to him. So that was what tickling was. Minho couldn’t lie, it felt nice being able to laugh so much from a few wiggling fingers. But looking up at the smirks on everyone’s faces…. something told him he should keep that fact to himself, at least for now.

“You’re having fun too aren’t you Irino?” Han cooed, smooshing Lino’s face between his hands. Minho averted his eyes shyly. The ace always saw through him so easily.

“Do you want to continue baby?” Channie whispered in his ear, giggling like a hyena when Minho cringed away as even that tickled him. He nodded bashfully, flushing when everyone awwed at him. “Shut up!” He pouted, the spark of defiance returning to his eyes.

But when Chan's hands roamed over his torso, Han now scratching under his chin and all over bis neck, Lino squeaked, a soft sound of surprise. “Tickle tickle tiiickle~~ linoyaa~” Sweet giggles followed the two’s actions, stars glittering in Lino’s eyes as he squirmed around, holding onto Channie’s and Hannie’s hands. “Hehehe, nohohoho~” He squeaked out, utterly insincerely.

Eventually he couldn’t take anymore, sliding down to lay with his head on Chan’s thigh. The two let him go, Hannie tousling his hair and kissing his forehead in cuteness aggression. “Hyung you’re making it impossible for us to ever stop tickling you. Oh my god you are SO adorable!!”

Minho’s face was going to explode, his whole body felt warm from the praise and affection.

And he wanted a liiiittle more~~

“You’re too weak to ti-tickle me jelly arms,” he baited, hoping it would earn him the punishment he wanted. “You think I need to be strong to tickle you? Hyung, you melt when we were only tickling you so softly. I bet even Seungmin can hold you down right now and wreck you like this.” Han replied smugly with a glint in his eyes, Seungmin protesting indignantly in the background.

The poor lee opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water, unable to come up with a proper reply to that. Luckily, he didn’t have to as Han did indeed rise to his bait. Minho’s arms were soon pinned above his head by Chan, Hannie straddling his hips and smirking down at him.

“I’m gonna tickle you everywhere and I’m not gonna stop until I hear you begging.”

It was all very gentle in the beginning. Light tracing and soft pokes that had Minho gasping and squirming, all the while keeping an eye for any sign of distress from their cute kitten. They wanted to make sure that Minho would enjoy his first time and have as much fun as the kids were having.

Knowing he wouldn’t be able to survive that, Minho taunted Jisung with a cocky, “Ihihis that the best youhu can do?” Han glared playfully down at him, now determined to make the older regret his words. He was not one to back down from a challenge. One look was exchanged and Chan was pulling Lino’s arms even higher, stretching him so much, his back remained arched up, ribs sticking out invitingly.

And Han took full advantage of that, pulling his hyung’s sweater all the way up to his neck. Minho giggled nervously. He was about to find out just how ruthless Sungie could be. He wasn’t known around the dorm as the resident tickle monster for nothing. Han’s fingers kneaded at the older’s waist and he started blowing harsh raspberries on Minho’s ribs.

Then Hannie was going deceptively easier on Minho than he had promised, blunt nails dragged over his ribs, tummy and sides, gently scratching at spots that made him flinch and writhe. Minho shivered, giggling quietly. The featherlight touches weren’t really tickling him anymore as much as it was teasing and he slowly realized that the longer Hannie kept it up, the more hypersensitive he felt.

“Wow, ahahall that brahahagging for this?” Minho taunted, smirking briefly at Hannie’s annoyed expression before it melted into a toothy smile as the tickling continued. “Oh you’re so asking for it hyung.” There was a hint of anger in the ace’s voice. Fingers plunged into his sides quickly and roughly, squeezing and pinching at the sensitive skin.

“Nonononoo! dohOHOHOHON’T dohohoo thAHAHAHAHAHA! IHIHIHIM SOHAHAHA- SOHOHOHORRY!!” The sudden intensity had the kitten bucking up, throwing his head back as he screamed out laughs. Han was really good at this. Loud squeals of mirth drowned out any teasing the younger ones threw his way as they watched from the sidelines. “What’s wrong hyung? Isn’t this what you wanted?”

This went on for a while, Han changing spots every so often to keep the lee on his toes. And Minho was helpless to stop it. Engulfed in boisterous cackles, he squeezed his eyes shut, head shaking side to side as if he didn’t know what to do with himself. “No nohohohahaha not there, ohohoho my GAHAHAHAAD. Ihihit’s sO BAD, AHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAA.”

Eventually they stopped for a break, Chan letting go of the kitten’s arms in favor of pulling him into his lap and feeding him some water. The second oldest was panting hard, heart still racing. “You okay hyung?” Hannie asked, brushing away the damp hair from Lino’s forehead. He nodded, smiling shyly at the ace.

“Good, cause I’m not done with you yet.” Minho’s eyes widened at that and he tried to crawl away in a futile attempt at escape but the two lers pulled him right back. “Oh no, you’re not getting away that easily. You asked for this, remember?” Chan mused into his ear, fingers pinching mischievously at his waist.

Minho yelped, kicking out at Han who was trying to get closer. “Do you want me to get your feet too?” Hannie asked threateningly, grabbing onto one of Minho’s ankles.

The kitten immediately went pliant, head shaking vigorously. The two lers exchanged looks at his reaction, deciding to file that info for later. They would have plenty of time to put their knowledge and skills to use. Especially now that they knew for certain that not only was Lino super ticklish, but he seemed to love it even more than Han himself did.

This time, Chan sat back with the younger kids, allowing Jisung to handle his bratty hyung. And Han went straight to business, laying Minho down on his back and straddling his thighs.

Experimentally, he placed his hands on Lino’s lower sides, fingers drumming into the bare skin. Minho giggled nervously, watching every motion of Hannie’s fingers with rapt attention. But nothing could’ve prepared him for what he felt when the ace pressed his thumbs right into his hip bone, skillfully massaging ticklish circles into the hard surface.

Lino squealed, fists clenching the fabric of his sweater to keep his hands away. Han noted with surprise. He hadn’t asked his hyung to do that and the fact that he was doing so of his own accord was just too cute.

Hannie projected that cuteness aggression into the tickling, thumbs digging in juuust right to have Minho laughing hysterically. “Tickle, tickle, tickle hyungie~~” He teased, watching amusedly as the kitten turned impossibly redder, his struggles getting more frantic at the use of the dreaded word.

“FAHAHAHAHAHACK, HAHA-HAHAHANIEHIHI IHIHIT TIHIHICKLES!!” Lino bucked up and squirmed violently, all the while trying his utmost to keep his hands away. It was plain how much their cute little kitten was enjoying his new activity.

Lino didn't understand why he felt such a strong urge to twist away from Hannie's hands. He liked this, loved it even. And yet his body reflexively tried to move away.

“NAHAHAHAAHAA WA-WAHAHAHAIT HAHANNIE PLEASE!” He screeched, laughter going silent before coming back full force. “Aww begging already hyungie? I was sure you’d last a little longer.” Han smiled sadistically, drilling his fingers into Lino’s upper ribs, the kitten arching up only to come crashing back down, hands grabbing at Sungie’s ones in an attempt to ground himself.

He twisted his torso left and right but Minho found that no matter what he did, he was helpless to the ticklish sensations taking over.

“PLHEHEHEASE IHIHI CAHAHAN’T, IHI CAHAHAN’T ANYHYHYMORHOHORE,” he pleaded with teary eyes, and feeling a little sympathetic, Hannie eased up, moving his hands up to scribble lightly at Lino’s neck. Sweet giggles escaped his throat, Minho holding on to Hannie’s hands as if his life depended on it.

“Who’s your favorite dongsaeng hyung~~?” Hannie teased, fondly, cooing when Minho immediately answered in a hoarse voice, ”Youhuhu, Hanniehihie ihihis my favorite. Plehehehehease.”

And with that, Sung let up, carefully wiping the tears from his cheeks and cradling his hyung. He rocked the giggly kitten side to side, rubbing his belly to ease the tingles.

“You did so well hyung, I’m so proud of you,” he whispered quietly, kissing the top of his hyung’s head. Minho quickly fell asleep like that, a wide smile and soft blush still coloring his perfect face.

[hedgehog-moss]

The story of my 3-year-long quest to identify a very rare bird

So I've been trying almost since I moved here to figure out what bird made this strange call that I sometimes heard near my house:

I tried to google "european bird that sounds like a laughing hyena?" and also to imitate the noise over the phone for a friend who once took an online bird course, but she had no idea. (Well, she said "that's a hyena." I said, "but I hear it all the time! Near my house!! Wait I'll do it better." She said, please stop making a hyena noise :(( and I stopped because the cats thought I was losing my mind)

Eventually I managed to record the actual bird call on my phone, and used a Shazam app for birds—but once again, no luck. The first app I tried just assumed it was being trolled and was like "it's you, isn't it? That's not a bird that's your stupid human laugh, you're making fun of me. I'm not an idiot"

The second birdsong app was more insecure and apologised a lot for failing to identify my bird. I thought it must be a rare bird! (The only uncommon bird I know of in this region is the vulture but it sounds less like a hyena and more like if elephants were birds.) Every time I heard the call (usually during the day) I opened the window trying to a) get a better recording so my app would finally have an epiphany, and b) see something flying off a tree.

At one point I was cutting brooms in the pasture and heard the call very loudly, as if the bird was just a few metres away, and it wasn't coming from the sky. I googled every possible version of "flightless (?) bird that nests in thorny bushes?" and found nothing, and started wondering if it was actually a mammal. But I couldn't think of any plausible local mammal that would make this sound—definitely not a fox or badger, who say WAOOHHH, and nothing like the polite whistle of marmots. We've got pine martens in the woods and I found a video called "mating pine marten scream bark" and thought oh!! that must be it! ... but then I listened to it and it sounded like yiiiaaaaaeeeeee, like if you stepped on a baby banshee's toe, nothing at all like the heheeheuruurhh of a hyena who just heard a good joke.

Anyway, this morning I was in the pasture and I once again heard the hyena laugh! I was standing by the moose butler tying up the hay net, away from any trees or shrubs and the call came from just behind me. I turned around thinking there was absolutely no way for the mystery bird to hide, it had landed on the ground behind me and this time I was going to see it!

And

it was HER:

Absolutely no doubt. I saw Pampy's throat vibrating along with the last echoes of the hyena laugh. All these years I've been saying that llamas are very quiet animals who just make cute little "hum-hum" sounds (I rarely hear adult llamas humming to one another, it's mostly for mother llamas to communicate with their baby and with me) and I had no idea that the shrieking hyena-bird I occasionally heard outside my house was Pampelune! I googled "llama alarm cry" and immediately found youtube videos featuring llamas making this exact sound. There was a stray dog nearby this morning that Pandolf eventually chased away, so maybe Pampy was the first to hear him and sounded the alarm. Maybe she uses this cry to tell Pan to go do his guard dog job, because he left the pasture and ran into the woods when she made the sound (while I was turning round like "aha! you can't run, hyena-bird!")

I wanted to share this discovery! I've had llamas for nearly 4 years and I'm only now finding out that they can laugh like hyenas when the situation calls for it. I feel bad for the poor birdsong app that I've repeatedly gaslighted feeding it a llama call and insisting that it identify this bird for me while it hung its head in shame like "I swear I don't have your bird in my database. I'm so sorry. I'm a bad app."

Llamas are fascinating creatures. Please experience their majestic alarm call again, and be alarmed:

[itzsana-kiddingmenow]

hc where minho gets his head stuck in one of those tight stage shirts, and instead of helping chan just tickles him, claiming he's "trying to help" LMAO

𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙘𝙠:

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨: 788

𝙖/𝙣: it has been one year since i posted my first fic, hoodie, which was also a minchan fic, so to celebrate, here's another! happy hoodie day, everyone <3

𝙩/𝙬: rough and soft tickles, minho gets stuck

𝒍𝒆𝒆: minho

𝙡𝙚𝙧: channie

𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕: @someone-who-loves-kpop-saranghae @jeonginsdiary @leeknowstan33 @v--143 @wereallgonnadieonedaybutnottoday @inkytornpagess @lajanaa @a-wild-seungberry @channieissocute125 @soap143 @seungsluvv @skznccmlee @moony-9 @sunny-117

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠! 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞? 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐛s🖤

“Whooo…” Minho sighed. “What a performance.” He groaned at the way the tight, stiff material of his shirt hugged his curves, not allowing for an ounce of breathing room. 

Chan shut the door to their hotel room behind him, fondly smiling as the dancer practically teleported to the suitcases to find something more comfortable to wear. 

“Ahhh…” Minho finally found his hoodie and sweats, immediately grabbed the hem of his shirt while Chan was searching for his sweatpants. 

Minho, desperate to get out of the stiff shirt that made his chest hurt, pulled it sharply over his head. 

Then it happened. 

“…Hyung?”

Chan turned to see what happened, just to let out a strangled laugh and hyena like cackles when Minho tugged at his arms, pinned high above his head by the shirt. 

The leader could hear a small grunt and Minho’s head popped up, hair disheveled and face slightly pink from embarrassment. "I might have been a teensy bit hasty..."

“Oh, Min…” Chan sighed, clearly amused. He walked over to the struggling dancer and traced along the shape of his pecs, causing poor Minho to squeak and stumble a little. 

Chan hissed in sympathy at the red marks along Minho’s torso, the shirt’s friction causing scarring to appear. 

He got the lotion, laying Lino down on the bed. Maybe he could kill two birds with one stone. 

“Aah—HAHA Hyung p-please just get the freaking shirt ohofff!!” Minho giggled cutely, squirming as Chan massaged the lotion into his upper torso. 

“Stay still or I’ll get your armpits too.” Chan deadpanned, fondness surging in his chest as Minho turned scarlet, suddenly letting out a boisterous squeal when Chan massaged the lotion into his belly button. 

“Does it tickle, Minnie?~” Chan teased, spidering around the area as Minho thrashed and cackled his heart out. 

“HYUHUHUNG HYUNG I CAHAHAN’T MOHOHOVE!!” Minho was teary eyed already, cute smile spread wide across his red, flushed face. 

“Oh, I know. Shouldn’t have gotten yourself stuck, huh?” Chan moved his fingers, gently spidering up the bare torso in front of him, earning shrieks and high-pitched giggles from the poor dancer. 

Hands massaged the lotion gently into his armpits, and Minho screamed, legs drumming frantically behind Channie. 

“NOHOHONONO IHIT TIHIHICKLES PLEASE STAHAHAHAHAP!!” Minho threw his head in every direction, letting out a plethora of happy little noises that had Chan’s heart almost exploding in cute aggression. 

“You’re too cute, I really can’t take it.” Chan mused, leaning down to kiss his little kitten on the cheek. 

He decided to give the younger a break, moving to his neck instead. Tracing along the area, he relished in Minho’s whimpery, cute giggles. 

“It’s so nice isn’t it? You act so tough in front of the fans and the others, but here, I have you giggling and squealing like this…all for me…” Chan sighed contentedly. Min squeaked at the leader’s words, teary eyes looking up at Channie with almost all the love in the world. 

“But of course, there are times where I need to get you back for all the mischief you’ve caused.”

Minho’s eyes widened before all hell unleashed. 

Chan ducked his head down, blowing raspberry after raspberry onto the warm skin of the kitten’s waist and belly button, hands reaching to knead torturously into the boy’s ribs, outstretched from all the thrashing he had done. 

Minho howled, stilling to let out a deafening scream before descending into the loudest laughter Chan had ever heard from him. 

“STAHAHAHAAHAP OHO MY GOHOHOHOSHH—PLEHEHEHEHEASE!!”

His arms trembled in the shirt, tears dripping into the collar as he cackled and laughed and squealed until his throat went hoarse. 

It was torture, but it felt so nice to laugh and laugh and not think of anything but how much happiness Min felt. He could feel his mind practically melting under Channie’s fingers. 

“IHIHIT TIHIHICKLES TOO MUHUHUCHH!! HYUHUHUNG I CAHAHAHANT I CANT STAHAHAP STOP STAHAP PLEHEHEHEASE AGHH!!” Minho babbled, laughter interrupting again. He was sure this was the worst wrecking of his life, he was unable to even think straight anymore. 

Before he could even comprehend it, his shirt came loose; Channie had stopped and had pulled it properly off of him. Minho felt unrelenting sleepiness overwhelm him, giggling hysterically and panting for air. 

“You okay, kitten?” Chan asked, slipping the dancer’s once-abandoned clothes onto his boneless frame. 

“Mhm…yeheheah…” Min mumbled, an unfamiliar need for the older next to him leading to the kitten grabbing Chan’s waist and pulling him into an open hug. 

Channie smiled as Minho shyly buried his head into his chest, arms slipping under the dancer to hold his sides, warmth seeping into his body. 

“…I’ll ask them to give you looser shirts.”

“That would be for the best.”

[johnnycakesswitch]

soda’s tummy is so ticklish-it’s off limits because if anyone touches him there he’s laughing so hard he’s borderline pissing himself. one time darry was in the middle of ping and soda and he stretched out and his hand brushed soda’s stomach and his eyes just snapped open and he’s laughing like a hyena and darry is just like “…dude cmon”

Pls he’s so sensitive when it comes to tickles 😭😭 everyone else is evil and will poke him in the stomach and he’ll just shriek, every single one of them will do it to him. Two-Bit is especially evil and will come up behind Soda and squeeze his sides and Soda about jumps a foot in the air. If Soda ever wanted to be the little spoon during cuddles with anyone it just would not work out because you’d put your arms around his waist and after a few seconds he’s trembling and his eyes are watering and he’s biting his lip to try and keep from hysterically laughing. The only way is to wrap your arms around his chest 😭

[watchmegetobsessed]

❄️LEFT ON READ❄️

A/N: fanficmas has come to its end! i hope you uys enjoyed these little festive fics, thank you for reading and thank you to those who also participated in it!!

WORD COUNT: 3.4k

SUMMARY: Following a drunk night you realize you sent some voice messages to your childhood best friend about having feelings for him. Panic sets in when he leaves you on read with no reply.

This fic is part of ❄️ FANFICmas 2022 ❄️ Read more about fanficmas here!

“Oh my God, his car is on Anne’s driveway!”

You burst through the front door like the house is on fire, ripping your coat and scarf off of you while kicking your boots off. Your mom didn’t understand what you said, she just heard you act like there’s an emergency, so she runs out of the kitchen, her hands covered in flour, looking at you with wide eyes.

“What happened? Is the Christmas tree on fire?” she asks and you shake your head.

“Worse. Harry is home!” you groan before running upstairs, her laughter echoing behind you.

“I’m sure it will be alright, Honey!”

“Nothing will be alright mom!” you shout back before shutting the door of your childhood room behind you.

This is not how you imagined returning for the holidays, you ruined it all with one drunk night when you couldn’t control yourself and sent the absolute worst voice messages to your childhood best friend, Harry. The Harry Styles, the guy half the world is in love with.

And you’re part of that half, have been since you were about twelve.

ONE WEEK EARLIER

“Oh my God, I really shouldn’t drink another one,” you snort out a laugh, but take the tequila shot from Nara anyway.

“Come on, it’s our Friendmas, we all agreed to get smashed!” Cindy shrieks, clearly drunk, because her blonde hair has stray strands that escaped her always neat bun and she never allows her hair to be anything but perfect.

“Alright, alright, cheers!” you snort out a laugh as you clink your glasses together for the fifth time before chugging down the shots.

You can’t help but grimace as the liquid slips down your throat, burning your inside. Deep down you know you’ll regret all this alcohol in the morning when you’ll feel like dying, but tonight, you’re letting loose.

Your phone lights up on the table and you snatch it with a groan, trying to focus on the screen to see who just texted you.

HARRY: Alright, just text me when you get home so I know you didn’t die. Xx

You snort out a laugh, because you can actually hear him say it in your head.

“Oh, I’m guessing the rockstar has texted Y/N!” Nara laughs and you pull your shoulders up to your ears giggling.

“Stop!”

“When are you guys gonna have toe curling sex?” Cindy bluntly asks, grabbing her mojito from the table, trying to wrap her plump lips around the straw, but she misses several times before succeeding.

“Shut up, never!” you gasp, but warmth instantly crawls up your neck to your cheeks.

“Oh, come on!” Nara rolls her eyes. “You’re clearly in love with him and I’m sure he feels the same way. What’s stopping you?”

“It’s complicated, he doesn’t… He doesn’t love me that way,” you mumble, typing a reply to him that’s full of typos probably.

“You’re missing out, babe,” Cindy points at you, attempting to wink.

“You’ve definitely imagined what you’d say to him,” Nara grins at you. “Let us hear it!”

“No!” you protest.

“Yes! Let’s hear how you’d beg him to dick you down on the stage of Maddison Square Garden!” Cindy laughs like hyena and you gape at how unhinged she has become.

“Jesus,” you sigh, knowing they won’t leave you alone until you comply. “Okay, so I always imagined sending him voice messages, because he says he loves them, because he can listen to them anytime he wants.”

You look at your friends, pretending to hold your phone to your mouth, as if you were actually recording.

“Spicy,” Cindy giggles.

“What would you tell him?” Nara grins with glassy eyes.

“Something like… Hey, it’s Y/N.”

“Why would you say it’s you, he would literally be in his text messages with you,” Cindy cocks her head to the side.

“Shut up, Cindy!” Nara pokes her, making you laugh. “Go on!”

“Okay, so… There’s something I really want to tell you and I don’t think I can keep it a secret anymore. I’ve been madly in love with you since seventh grade, Harry. None of the guys I dated ever compared to you and I’m convinced I might die alone if we don’t get together.”

You let out a laugh, gesturing around with your phone in hand. You even almost drop it, Cindy shrieking and attempting to catch it, but you manage to keep it in your hand.

“Where’s the dirty part?” Nara asks.

“Yeah, you should tell him you want to suck his dick dry,” Cindy nods, taking another sip from her drink.

“I could never tell him about the things I’ve fantasized about in the past decade,” you laugh with your head falling back.

“But you can tell us!” Nara nods enthusiastically.

“No! I’m not… I want to keep that to myself, but let’s just say everything his fans thought of… I thought of those too.”

All three of you laugh before you venture to other topics and Harry gets forgotten. The night stretches long, it’s past three in the morning by the time you get back to your apartment. Even drunk, you remember Harry asked you to text him when you get home, so falling into bed you muster up some energy to open up his messages. Your fingers linger over the screen as you try to put together your thoughts, but all of them vanish when you see the last things you sent him.

Voice messages.

There are several of them after your last text to him. Blood rushes out of your head instantly as you sit up, suddenly wide awake. You tap on the first one and your voice flows out of your phone with the background noises of the bar.

“---and I don’t think I can keep it a secret anymore. I’ve been madly in love with you since seventh grade, Harry.”

“Oh no,” you gasp as you go to the next one.

“---convinced I might die alone if we don’t get together.”

Frantically you go over all of them, wishing the ground would open and it would swallow you forever.

“You should tell him you want to suck his dick dry.” Cindy’s voice is heard in the next one.

“---keep that to myself, but let’s just say everything his fans thought of… I thought of those too.”

The last message cuts off after your laughter. You’re staring at your phone in utter disbelief, part of you hoping the voice messages would just disappear from the thread and you’d realize you’re just too drunk and made up the whole thing.

But they remain there, and when your eyes wander lower you see the word that almost sends you into a coma.

Read 2:34 am

TODAY

Christmas was your favorite time, because both you and Harry returned to where you met when you were kids, but this year, your little trick ruined it all.

Harry hasn’t replied to your voice messages, not even to the text you sent him in the morning, trying your best to put out the fire you just lit.

Y/N: I can explain this, Harry. I got drunk, I didn’t know what I was talking, it was all just an accident! Can we pretend I didn’t send those messages? Please???

You guess his silence is a reply too, not the one you wanted though.

Now you’re locked up in your old room as you hear your mom greeting her friends for her usual Christmas party she holds every year. Normally you’d be down there, sipping on some wine, mingling, but this year, you might not even show your face.

Not when you know Harry could be already down there.

Maybe he is not coming. Maybe he was so traumatized by your voice messages that he will never ever want to see or talk to you. If that’s the case, you’ll probably die, because he is your best friend, but facing him right now also makes you want to vanish from this world.

You fucked yourself over. Big time.

“Y/N?” you hear a knock on the door from your mom as you’re anxiously pacing the floor. She opens the door and stands with her hands on her hips. “Stop acting like a baby and come down, will you?”

“Is he here?”

“No, Anne came alone,” she sighs.

At first you’re relieved. But then you realize that he might actually never want to talk to you again because of those stupid messages and that feels way worse.

Unwillingly, you join the party downstairs, but you try to avoid Anne. She is so close to Harry, there’s a chance he told her what happened and there’s no way you can look into her eyes after that.

It’s probably not the best idea, but you have some wine that makes you dizzy and you get into a spiral about Harry.

Why didn’t he reply to your messages? He could have at least reacted or told you it’s better if you never talk. You’ve known him for so long, it’s the least you deserve. Is he home alone now? He would rather stay back than to face you? Is this really the end of your friendship?

“Oh fuck,” you mumble under your breath as you decide it’s time to slow down on the alcohol, since it’s what got you in trouble in the first place, so put your glass into the dishwasher.

“Everything alright?”

Anne’s voice makes you jump and you’re met with her warm smile when you turn around.

“Yeah!” you squeak. “Everything is… perfect!”

She’s come to get a refill and you watch her as if she was a ticking bomb. But she is her usual self, there’s no sign of pity towards you, so there’s a chance she doesn’t know what happened between you and Harry.

“Where… Where’s Harry?” you ask, trying your best not to sound like an obsessed psycho.

“Oh, he had a meeting or whatever. He said he’ll come right over when he’s done, but maybe he got stuck in front of his laptop,” she chuckles. “I’m sure he’ll be here soon, don’t worry,” she pats your hand before walking out of the kitchen.

From that moment, your stomach drops every time you hear the front door opening, thinking it’s Harry, but as two hours pass by you start to think that he won’t come. You keep checking your phone, hoping for a message, but only seeing your pathetic last text every time you open the thread is like a slap across your face.

You really messed up because you were drunk and you outed yourself in such a ridiculous way. Now your best friend doesn’t even want to see you.

The party comes to its end, the house empties out and you get into a lethargic mood as you help your mom clean up.

“Why don’t you just go over and talk to him, hm?” she asks seeing your bitter face.

“It’s pretty obvious he doesn’t want to talk,” is all you say.

You lock yourself up in your room for the rest of the night, acting like a heartbroken teenager. You can’t believe this is how you lose Harry, your best friend, the boy you grew up with and the only man you ever truly loved.

It’s sometime past ten when you hear knocking. On your window.

“What the—“

As you sit up and walk over to the window you almost get a heart attack when you see Harry squatting in front of your window that’s right above the garage. Growing up it gave you the perfect opportunity to sneak out, because you could easily climb out without your mom noticing and Harry also used it as his entrance quite a few times. But now as you see the grown version of him there, your mind goes blank as you open the window.

“What… Harry, what are you doing?” you ask as he gestures at you to step back so he can climb in.

“God, this went easier when I was fifteen,” he chuckles when he is finally standing in your room.

“Harry, would you mind explaining why you didn’t use the front door?” you ask, folding your arms over your chest.

“Because your mum is probably asleep and I didn’t want to wake her.”

“Why didn’t you come in the morning then?”

“Because I wanted to talk,” he replies with a smug grin.

It’s odd to see grown Harry in your old room, you have tons of memories with him from when you were kids, but he is a man now, a tall, ridiculously good-looking man in your room that still has your old posters on the yellow walls.

“Talk?” you squeak, anxiety creeping up its way on your spine again.

“Mhm, about your messages. Remember them?” he asks and while you’re debating whether you should jump out the window or play dead, he is smirking at you as if it was all just a joke to him.

“I do,” you nod shortly.

“Anything to add to them?”

“Nope,” you say, but then change your mind. “Actually, I do have something to add.”

“Okay, go on, I’m listening,” he nods, still grinning as he leans against your dresser.

“Leaving me on read was rude. I might have sent you some unhinged, unexpected messages, but I apologized in the morning and you left me on read! And then you didn’t show up at the party, you made me think you never want to talk to me again. That was very rude.”

He stares back at you, his head tilted to the side and you feel the urge to hit him if he doesn’t wipe that smirk off of his face.

“I know. And I’m sorry for that,” he finally says. “But I felt like it’s not a conversation I want to have over text messages.

“Um, okay…”

Pushing himself away from the dresser he starts to approach you slowly while you’re backing at the same time, but the room is not too spacious, your back quickly hits the wall.

“The messages were unexpected,” he points out the obvious. “I have to say, when I listened to them in the middle of the night, I didn’t know what to think.”

“It was an accident, we got drunk and we were just messing around.”

“Clearly,” he chuckles. “So then… did you mean it?”

“What?”

“The things you said. That you’re madly in love with me and that you might end up dying alone if we don’t get together.”

Hearing the words from his mouth makes your head spin as you stare back at him on the verge of the biggest turning point of your friendship. For a moment you hesitate, consider saying it was just a joke, but you’re also too tired to keep it a secret any longer.

“Yes,” you finally say, your heart drumming in your ears.

He stares at you for what feels like forever, the corners of his mouth curling up and you see a little nod from him before he backs away from you so he’s not cornering you anymore.

“Good,” he then says and you wait for more, because that one word can’t be his reaction alone, he has to have more to say. But he remains silent, the smirk still plastered across his face and you finally lose your patience with him.

“Good? That’s really all you have to say? You know what? You’re an asshole! I might have sent you the most awkward and unhinged messages, but you left me on fuckin read and now all you say is good, but nothing is good! If this is just a joke to you, then maybe we—“

The words die on your tongue when his lips smash against yours, his hands locking your face in his palms as he kisses all your worries, fears and anxiety away. He pushes you against the wall again, his hips pressing against yours and you can’t hold a moan back when his tongue meets yours. Your head bumps against the light switch over and over again and it takes some time to realize that you keep turning the lights on and off in the room.

You grin against his lips and he keeps kissing them as you let out a laugh, your hands holding onto his slim waist.

“If you think…” he keeps kissing you, “That I’m done scolding you…” more kisses, “For leaving me on read… you’re wrong.”

“Scold me, punish me,” he chuckles, pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth. “Do whatever you want.”

“Naughty,” you giggle.

He kisses you some more before pulls back, a more serious look on his face.

“I’m sorry for leaving you on read, but I really wanted to see your pretty face when I tell you that I’ve been madly in love with you too.”

Your heart is about to burst out of your chest at his words, the pain you felt in the past week already long forgotten when you see how he is looking at you.

“You’re not just pulling my leg? It’s not just a Christmas prank, right?”

“No,” he chuckles. “I just can’t believe this is how it happened.”

“I’m never drinking again,” you groan, but he just kisses your cheek.

“It’s fine, you can always send me dirty voice messages,” he smirks playfully.

“You’ll never let me live it down, right?” you sigh and he shakes his head grinning.

“Nope.”

“Alright, then I will tease you about leaving me on read.”

“Tease me all you want, as long as I get to kiss you afterwards,” he mumbles as he leans closer, brushing his lips against yours teasingly before finally kissing you.

ONE YEAR LATER

There is not one finger Harry has free as he pushes his way into his home, dozens of shopping bags hanging from him everywhere. With a groan he kicks the front door closed behind him and drops everything to the floor, finally feeling his fingers again.

“Babe?” he calls you, a bit frustrated that you didn’t come out to the car to help him carry the bags in and he is way too proud to make two rounds, so he had to do it all at once, resulting in him becoming a Christmas tree himself.

He walks further into the home he’s been sharing with you this past six months, looking for your pretty face to ask what was so important that you couldn’t help him.

To be exact, you left him on read when he texted you that he’s arrived.

“Y/N?” he calls for you again and he finally hears your footsteps approaching from the bedroom. Moments later you appear in your silky robe, an oblivious smile on your face.

“Hey babe!” you greet him and he forces himself to ignore how deliciously cozy you look with your freshly washed hair, makeupless face and he can smell your lotion even from across the room.

“Why didn’t you come out to help me with the bags?” he huffs, pouting his lip as you approach him gracefully. “I texted you and you saw it!”

“Oh,” you breathe out furrowing your eyebrows. “You mean… I left you on read when I should have definitely replied? Hm, that sounds like something that happened before to us.” You tap on your chin, pretending to be thinking and he finally realizes what it’s about.

“Babe…” he groans, but a chuckle slips from his lips. “Am I still not forgiven for that?”

“Never,” you grin at him devilishly as you step closer, placing your hands to the base of his neck.

“This was rude, I had to carry all the stuff on my own!” he pouts his lips at you like a little kid, his hands finding your waist.

“Aw, I’m sorry. I was busy, actually, so I couldn’t help.”

“What was so important?” he asks, narrowing his eyes at you.

You step back, his hands slipping off your hips and you gift him with an angelic smile as you untie your robe and let it slide off your shoulders, revealing the sparkly red lingerie set you’re wearing underneath. Harry’s mouth hangs open instantly, his eyes roaming your body relentlessly.

“Is this a good enough excuse?” you ask, batting your eyes at him.

“Yeah, you’re forgiven!” he nods eagerly as he steps closer just to pick you up bridal style and he carries you back to the bedroom as you laugh, pressing kisses to his jawline, the grocery bags long forgotten in the hallway.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!