#incorrect Harry Potter

[goldandglittersblog]

Hermione: Good night,guys. I am going to bed.

Draco: Can I slither in?

Everyone:

The ghosts:

Owls:

Crookshanks:

Peacocks of Malfoy Manor:

Mauruders from the after life:

Draco:*visibly panicking* DID I SAY THAT OUT LOUD?

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Remus: So you lived in a closet?

Harry: Well, technically it's a cupbo-

Remus: I have some experience with that

[allaboutlov3]

I can’t stop thinking about the discussion James and Regulus must have had when Harry was sorted into Gryffindor. James would smirk at Regulus for a looooong time.

But oh how sweet Regulus comeback was when Harry was chosen as seeker for the quidditch team.

[iamnmbr3]

Diary Tom Riddle: We have so much in common! Both half-bloods-

Harry: Both my parents were magical so not really but ok.

Diary Tom Riddle: Both orphans.

Harry: My parents died because of Voldemort...

Diary Tom Riddle: Mine too! What are the chances?

Harry: ... (-_-)

Diary Tom Riddle: It's like we're soulmates.

Harry: Funny you should say that.

[betterpatroclus]

*screaming in the distance*

Sirius: Was that a peacock?

Remus: How do you know what a peacock sounds like?

Sirius: You don’t?!

[bruhseidon]

Y/N: Look at your dad. Such a dork, keeping snakes. I mean, it’s… at least it’s interesting, though. At least, like… I wish my dad kept snakes. I mean, it’s kind of cute. Like… your dad keeps snakes. How old is your dad? He’s obviously snake-keeping age. I don’t know, I think it’s kind of sweet. Mattheo, I wanna fuck your dad—

Mattheo, annoyed: Oh, really?

[that-bitch-kat3]

lily evans: can you imagine being mad at me lol? like how’d you let a 5’2” bitch piss you off? tf?

[cheridraco]

harry: I love you

harry: I said I love you

draco: you fucking better

harry: bitch

[skylarinfinity]

sirius : [try to warning harry and male reader about voldemort] voldemort is after something, something he didn't have last time.

harry : [concern] what is it-

male reader : [don't give a flying fuck about voldemort] is it a nose?

tags lists @sonicqaulan @graysonfriggason @thebettermaximofftwins @sloanalistair @acienthazard @starlinggoldeneyes @ortegaolsen @wednesdaywanda @sandwichmarvel @gardenofmarvel @wanda-cabin-natasha-jacket @panandinpain0 @badblondebisexualboy

[oxydiane]

harry: my old archenemy, draco malfoy

voldemort: i thought i was your archenemy?

harry: i have a life outside of you, tom

[goldandglittersblog]

Draco: Potter always sticks to weaselete like glue.

Hermione: Leave them alone.

Draco: Can you imagine being surrounded by people who are that clingy? It's so pathetic.

Hermione: I am gonna go to the library.

Draco: I would feel a lot better if crookshanks and I just went with you.

Crookshanks: meow

Draco: See, your little squish faced bugger wants to come too.

Hermione: This is exactly why I don't even have to imagine it.

[hxuse-xf-black]

[Deathly Hallows] Hermione: Harry- Harry, sighing despondently: Ginny used to call me Harry. Ron: Because it's your fucking name.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Sirius: did you get my assignment? Sorry it was late again

McGonagall: uh yeah, I looked it over nice work

Sirius: thanks mum

McGonagall:

Everyone in the class:

Sirius: why is everyone staring at me

James: you called Minnie mum

Remus: you said 'thanks mum'

Sirius: no I didn't. If anything I said thanks man

McGonagall: do you see me as a mother figure, Sirius?

Sirius: no! If anything I see you as a bother figure because you're always bothering me!

Marlene: hey! Show your mother some respect!

[incorrectbellamort]

Bellatrix: Can you keep a secret?

Voldemort: Do you know anything about my life?

Bellatrix: No, I do not. Good point.

[iamnmbr3]

Diary Tom Riddle: I shall now kill you with this giant snake that only I can control because only I speak-

Harry in Parseltongue: Guess what I can do?

Diary Tom Riddle: Even if you speak Parseltongue only I contain part of the soul of Lord Voldemort, the true Heir of Slytherin.

Harry: You're never going to believe this, but guess what?

[betterpatroclus]

Harry *texting*: bet your animagus form would be a snack

Harry: Snake! i meant snake.

Harry: autocorrect.

Voldemort:

Voldemort: how did you get my number?