Bats and Birds are making a plan to arrest Sionis
Dick : We know he's always taking one of the strippers with him at the end the night. With a significant preference for blondes and gingers. So we need someone inside.
*Thinking silence takes place*
Steph : I'm not going. Ever. He killed me !
Dick : Of course ! Ehm...Kate ?
Kate : Is ripping off his dick with my bare hands a traditional dance move ?
Dick : I think not ?
Kate : You have your anwser.
Dick : Jaybird, i'm sorry to ask this but...You're the only one...You know...Ginger...Dance ?
Jason : Oh, yeah, yeah. Got it. Smashing bones authorized ?
Dick : ...Till he's breathing and not braindead.
*Laeter in the Iceberg Lounge*
Dick : Someone sees Artemis ?
Tim : No but you should see this.
On the central pole a ginger 6'4 240 pounds peak male performance with a tiger mask is dancing with all his scars covered in a bright green lotion ( S/O @strange-birb ) on flawless by Beyoncé. A captivated Roman Sionis is watching closely throwing Benjamin by dozens.
Sionis tells him to come with a finger sign.
*After the rightful beating up*
Tim : How did you know Sionis was into guy ?
Jason : I didn't. I let the charm speaks.
Steph : For real ?
Jason : We've known the Sirens for years and you have never been curious how they keep seducing dudes when everybody knows you won't have nuts anymore at the end ?
Dick : Did you take poledance lessons with Selina and Harley ?
Jason : It's a great exercice, Richard.
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Time of the Month
AN: I'm suffering, so here's some of my faves reacting to their so having a rough time of the month.
He really doesn’t “get it”. 100% thinks you’re probably over reacting, however, you’re his sweetheart and he would do anything for you, so he’ll “play along” so long as he doesn’t need you for something else.
Won’t take time out of his busy schedule for you but he will:
Text you constantly through out the day.
Thinking of you doll x
Are you sleeping? x
You better be sleeping cause theres no other reason not to text back.
HELLO???
????
Sorry for loosing my temper baby, I love you. Just ordered those shoes you liked x
Will bring home/order dinner. He knows what you want, don’t worry babe, you don’t have to ask.
Still try to seduce you any way possible, he doesn’t care how messy it is.
Selina does not let her period slow her down, and so she’s hopeful that she can rub some of that off on you.
Has a yoga routine specifically catered to that time of the month that she’s happy to teach you. Has a diet plan that’s full of iron heavy and unsaturated fatty foods - leafy greens, dark chocolate, the good stuff.
Of course she understands her lifestyle isn’t for everyone, and what kind of cat themed thief would she be if she didn’t have a giant heated blanket she’s happy for you to stretch out on and spend your time lounging in true luxury.
Move over, she’s getting into bed with you. She’s stolen all of Brucie Wayne’s streaming service log ins, and she’s brought 50 different snacks that will make your bloating worse, but will feel and taste good in the moment.
Get ready for a week of binge watching whatever films make you feel good, eating way too much sugar, and sleeping whenever feels right.
Did you know orgasms can help relieve period pains, migraines, and generally relieve stress?
Did you know if you ask Waylon, he will eat you out until you can’t take anymore and/or are feeling any amount of respite?
If that’s really not your thing, be willing to also do basically anything you ask of him. Bring you snacks? Rub your back? Just hold you? Anything you want.
Will find the time look after you. Any excuse for some lazy time with his favourite birdie.
He runs hot, so it’s like having your own personal heat pad. Will find it endearing if you lay stomach down of his stomach, legs, whatever part so you can press his heat directly to the area that needs it.
Foodie and a snacker, so if you’re craving something, he’s got you covered, and he’ll eat it with you, no questions asked.
Knows a lot of ecologically friendly herbal remedies that are almost certain to work. Just sit back, chill out, and drink this tea.
In the very unlikely chance that those don’t work, and you’re down for it; Ivy is happy to fuck the cramps away, whatever your preferred method of orgasm may be.
The Riddler: Understands how periods work, but doesn’t care. You can’t let your body control you, or interfere with the mind. (yes he IS the worst kind of person when he’s sick.)
He does however have bunch of tips and tricks for helping overcome/cope with cramps and other symptoms.
Has a bucket load of ibuprofen handy at all times.
“Did you take the pills I gave you? Good. You know, coffee will help get that into your bloodstream faster, and might give you more energy. Since you’re making coffee, I’ll have one too, thanks, you’re the best. Well, I’m the best, but you’re good too.”
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