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#missing red
jetglider · 10 months
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stupid4stupid
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tiger-grace · 28 days
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headcanon that after Dick Grayson being Robin all of the batkids interchangeably use “holy ____ batman” even at the worst possible moments
Steph, staring down at Tim in the medbay cot: holy common cold, batman
Tim: please stop
Steph: holy spleenless sillybilly batman
Tim: steph please
Jason Todd on the floor, bruised and bloodied: dad?
(The timer ticks down to three seconds)
Jason: well holy shitballs batman I’m going to fucking di-
KABOOM
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ditzybat · 3 months
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tim: ugh, i can’t go into the sewers to follow croc, can’t risk an infection
jason: what, are the sewers not good enough for your bristol bred sensibilities?
tim: i have no fucking spleen jason, of course i’m not gonna go into the fucking sewers - i’ll literally die
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thealexanderfiles · 5 months
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Jason, to himself: If I can catch Tim off guard when he comes back from patrol he'll confess about breaking my favourite Wonder Woman's mug
Jason, as Tim wanders in: Got anything to confess??
Tim, very very high off Gotham Harbor fumes: Ra's pickled my spleen.
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ato-dato · 1 year
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One mans barber can be another mans nemesis.
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kit04kat · 2 months
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I like to think that all the bat siblings just randomly drop insane lore about themselves. Like- they all have so much going on that there's no way to update everyone on everything so whenever one person mentions something crazy that happened in passing, the rest of the bats that didn't know are super chill about it. Except Bruce. When he finds out something he doesn't know, he always freaks out a little bit (control freak).
(Tim taking his daily antibiotic)
Bruce (trying to remember if something happened on patrol): Are you injured?
Tim (casually): No I'm alright. I've just had to take these ever since I lost my spleen.
Jason: Word. Good to be careful I guess.
Bruce (internally panicking): You lost your spleen?
Tim: well, maybe lost is the wrong word. I'm pretty sure Ra's Al Ghul still has it in a jar somewhere.
Jason: Not even surprised. He's creepy like that.
Bruce: ??!??!?!?!!
(Dick, Cass, Tim, and Bruce after patrol one night)
Tim: Hey Dick that was a cool move you pulled back there
Dick: Oh that? Yeah I learned that when I was apprenticing for Deathstroke.
Cass (nodding): Skilled fighter.
Dick: Yeah, situation kinda sucked but oh well.
Bruce: (Trying to piece together when the fuck that happened)
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oniomn · 2 months
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Alan, or Allan if you will
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solid-white · 22 days
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Tf2 details that a lot of people get wrong:
Demoman is most likely under 30, making him either the third or second youngest out of the cast. I GET IT. YOU CAN ALL STOP TELLING ME HE'S "not actually under 30" IM TALKING ABOUT THIS COMIC ISSUE AND THE GRAVEL WARS. NOT THE ACTUAL FULL COMIC SERIES WHERE IT TAKES PLACE 5 YEARS AFTER.
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Scout can drive. He even has that taunt where he drives that little scooter.
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Snipers glasses were likely given to him by his dad.
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Engineer is NOT the most """sane""" of the mercs, that actually goes to Heavy. He has a severe God complex (line: "I am a GOD!") And cut off his arm cuz why not. He also has green eyes, not blue.
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Medic is terrible at naming things. I just think this has a lot of potential for jokes.
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Pyro is completely aware they're setting stuff on fire, they just like wearing their mask. They also aren't a kid despite how Miss Pauling talks to them.
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Spy isn't as professional as people think. He takes 7 seconds to piss on a wall, and Miss Pauling tells him to wash his mask since he never takes it off.
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Soldier WAS "racist" (I really don't know how to describe the term here) until he met Zhanna.
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Finally, Heavy. I don't even need to explain anything. His entire CHARACTER is always mischaracterized to be Medic's alpha boyfriend. He's arguably the most caring one out of the mercs.
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majunju · 8 months
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yeah
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thedreadvampy · 2 years
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people seriously pretending EEAAO is overrated suddenly bc it swept awards? it swept awards largely because it is very very very good. I cried like someone who's just had a religious revelation BOTH times I watched it bc it touched something raw and real and beautiful but it was also just very, very funny. everyone's performance kills and the concept is creative and interesting and doesn't distract from the emotional core. you guys are just contrarian.
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fcthots · 4 months
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Jason is absolutely obsessed with skin to skin contact when he fucks you. He needs to be fully pressed against you with his hands touching anything they can reach. And 99% of the time it manifests in the sweetest and nicest ways you can imagine.
But sometimes he’s so mean about it. Sometimes he just wants to feel you jolt as he twists your nipples. Sometimes he just wants to feel you writhe against him as he overstimulates you. Sometimes he just wants to feel your moans and sobs in his chest. Sometimes he just wants to feel the way you press into his touch even when you know that touch will be a pinch or a grab or a bite.
Of course after, his touches will be feather light and he’ll press the most gentle kisses on every part of you that might sting come tomorrow. He will hold his hand over year heart and feel it beat. He will hold you to his chest for the sake of protecting you.
But for now, he likes the way you squeal when your back is against his chest and his hand presses against your stomach so he can feel his dick in you.
There is of course something to be said about the way you trust him like this, and the way it drives him insane, but that will be a thought for tomorrow in the lazy morning light. Right now, his goal is fucking all the thoughts out of your head for the night.
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kathaynesart · 7 months
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The @tmntaucompetition is no place for a tiny tot to be left alone, especially with all these rowdy teens running amok. My heart just broke when I saw little Kid Leo crying, @angelpuns and @red-rover-au, and I knew Replica Leo's would too. Problem is they're probably going to be searching for a while cuz Replica Leo is looking for other unsupervised children. Oops.
This is in response to these couple of threads I've seen going around: COMIC 1 - COMIC 2 - COMIC 3 - COMIC 4 - COMIC 5
You kids need to all calm down!
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teamblck · 9 days
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it’s just a silly little cowboy game right? RIGHT?
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ditzybat · 15 days
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Fanon Tim, a mysterious super smart hacker bro on the same level of Oracle, who’s also unhinged, caffeine dependent, morally grey, negative rizz, lowkey has the highest body count of all the bats, and is a badass: and I will watch the crimson blood, leak from you neck
Canon Tim, loser skater boy who plays DnD in his spare time, nap addicted, pulls hella bitches, strict moral code with the bad habit of seeing only black and white, and is also a major badass: woah, that kid is hardcore goth
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mylifeingotham · 6 months
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hihomeghere · 7 months
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Fakin' it | Arthur Morgan/Reader
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Word Count : 3k Summary : After a botched robbery, Arthur and you take refuge in a hotel, hiding from the O'Driscolls outside your door. When they do decide to search for you two, how will you throw them off your track? Warnings/Tags : Enemies to lovers <3, unprotected piv sex, guns, cursing, reader has female gentailia, fingering, one bed, fake marriage
Of course the job that went bad had to be with Arthur. Why Dutch had put you two together was beyond you. Everyone around the gang knew that it was volatile anytime you two were together. But, you were cunning, quick minded in a pinch. Arthur was strong, easily able to take down a man twice his size, not that someone of that caliber came along often. To put it simply, you were the brains, he was the brawn. As much as you hated to admit, you made a good team on jobs. This time however, a simple robbery had turned into dozens of O’driscolls around every corner. You two had barely made it into a hotel unscathed. 
“One room.” Arthur said, setting down some coins on the table top as you watched the door. Your hand resting against your gun in your dress pocket.
“Name?” The man asked with a smile.
“Callahan.” Arthur said looking back at you. “Mr. and Mrs. Callahan.” He said, turning back to the clerk. You heard footsteps outside of the hotel, you turned quickly grabbing Arthur’s arm.
“Sweetheart.” You cooed, internally cringing as you called him by that name. You looked at him with wide eyes, “Come on.” You said with a nervous smile.
“We’re newlyweds, a bit excited if you can’t tell.” He chuckled, turning back to the clerk, his arm wrapping around your waist.
“Of course.” The clerk said with a knowing smile, you wanted to barf as Arthur squeezed your waist. “Up the stairs to the left.” He said, handing Arthur a key.
“Much appreciated.” Arthur said his hand on the small of your back as you two climbed the stairs. As soon as you turned the corner you nearly ran to the door, Arthur slid the key in the lock and turned it, ushering you inside. As soon as the door was closed behind you, he was locking it just as fast. 
Once you got in the room you moved away from Arthur’s side, letting out a sigh as you looked around the room. One bed, of course, you two were acting as a couple.
“Mr. and Mrs. Callahan, really?” You asked, raising an eyebrow as you turned to look at Arthur. 
“Less eyes on us if we’re a couple, not cause I wanna play house with you.” He said with a grunt, barely raising his head to look at you. He walked over to the bed, moving to take his boots off.
“Less eyes.” You scoffed, looking around the room, walking over to the window. You pulled the blinds back, peeking out to the streets below. 
“The hell you think you're doing?” Arthur hissed, his hand wrapping around your wrist.
“Looking.” You said glaring up at him. “Is that a crime?”
“Do you want to give away our position?” He growled, his eyes dark.
“I think it’s pretty damn clear we’re in one of these shops, now we have to wait it out until they’re gone.” You said pulling away your arm from his grasp. He let out a deep breath, his jaw clenched as he looked away from you.
“How many are out there?” He asked, holding his hat as he ran a hand through his hair.
“I don’t know, maybe a dozen?” You said crossing your arms.
“Dutch said to keep a low profile,” He muttered to himself, “We can’t go out there guns blazing.” He said, setting his hat down on the bedside table. 
“That’s obvious.” You said, shaking your head. He scoffed, looking up at you.
“Are you trying to piss me off, or is that just one of your special talents?” Arthur said glaring at you.
“Oh I have lots of talents.” You say, stepping closer a scowl on your face. 
“If only one of them was keeping your mouth shut.” He growled. 
“God, what is your problem?” You huff looking away from him.
“My problem?” He scoffs getting up from the bed. “You’re my problem." He said, his chest almost touching yours as you looked up at him.
“Feelings mutual.” You huff, glaring up at him. He clenched his jaw, shaking his head as you walked away from him. 
“We’re gonna have to wait it out.” He said, crossing his arms over his chest.
“The hell are we gonna do?” You asked throwing your hands up. 
“I don’t know about you, but I’m gonna take advantage of this bed.” He said laying back down on the bed, placing his hat over his face. You bit your cheek looking at him as he crossed his legs. He did have a point, the bed looked a whole lot softer than your cot back at camp. You mulled it over for a second before sitting down on the edge of the bed. You unlaced your boots, laying back on the bed. Your eyes quickly drew heavy, the adrenaline of the chase finally wearing off. 
The sun was setting when you woke up, the light slowly disappearing behind the horizon. The room was quiet except for Arthur’s breathing. You sat up in bed, looking over at him. His hat had fallen off his face when he rolled over sometime during his sleep. He looked so peaceful when he slept, it was like seeing a completely different side of him. It’s at this moment you really appreciate how beautiful Arthur truly is. The bridge of his nose is high, broken one too many times. His plump lips parted slightly, like two petals. His sandy brown hair falling over his forehead. 
You wanted to reach out and move it out of his face, but thought better of it. You didn’t want to disturb him and it wasn’t often that you saw him without a furrowed brow. 
Just as you were laying back down you heard heavy footsteps up the stairs. By your guess, four, maybe five men. You sit up quietly, feeling your heart pound against your rib cage. Arthur sprang up in bed as soon as they kicked open the first door. They must have turned right when they went up the stairs. The yell of shock sounded farther down the hall. He turned to you, his eyes wide. He reached for his gun belt on the floor but you stopped him. Your brain was running through all the situations. Four or five men, sure you and Arthur could take them, but that’s not exactly a low profile. 
Against your better judgment you picked the solution with the least amount of bloodshed. You swung your leg over Arthur’s waist.
“The hell are you doing-“ Arthur hissed before you covered his mouth with your hand. Your fingers started working on the buttons of your blouse as you rolled your hips forward. Arthur looked up at you with a wide eyed expression, his bright eyes frantically moving between his gun belt on the floor and the door. His stubble lightly scratched your palm as you held your hand over his mouth, his plump lips almost kissing your palm.
You forced a high pitched moan as you moved your hips faster on the bed, the bedframe hitting the wall. Creating the illusion you two were having sex.
The gears slowly started to turn in Arthur’s mind, his hands gripping your hips as he propelled you faster. The bedframe was now rocking against the wall, as you pulled your arms out of your blouse, leaving your chest bare. Your nipples hardened from the cold air as goosebumps sprung up on your skin. Arthur’s eyes were closed as he turned his head, forcing a low groan. Although you knew his groans were fake, the way his body reacted to your touch was more than real. You kept up with your moans, trying to put on a good enough show.
The door was soon forced open, as two O’Driscolls entered  the room with their guns raised. You scream, Arthur is quick to pull your chest down to his. You were pressed tight against him, his warm hands keeping you flush against him, all of him. His work shirt rubs against your nipples in such a fucking delicious way, it doesn’t help tbe adrenaline coursing through your veins. You can’t see anything, your head buried into Arthur’s neck, his stubble now rubbing against your cheek.
“Get the hell out of here!” Arthur yells, hidden by your upper half.
One of them clears their throat before exiting the room, closing the door behind them. You hold your breath waiting for their footsteps to retreat down the hallway. You let out a sigh of relief as they meet back up with the other men, walking down the stairs.
Hesitantly Arthur moves his hands off your back, you sit up covering your breasts with your arms. Arthur, however, was staring up towards the ceiling. His jaw clenched as he avoided looking at you.
You moved off of his waist, grabbing your blouse before slipping your arms through the sleeves. You buttoned it up, swallowing thickly as Arthur cleared his throat. 
“Now uh-“ Arthur said letting out a sigh, “I want you to know that I didn’t see nothin’.” The bed whines slightly as he stands up. 
“I know you felt something.” You said, shaking your head as you blush from head to toe. 
“Now-“ Arthur sighed, running a hand through his hair as you turned to face him, his eyes flicking around the room before settling at your feet as he held up his hand. “We can just pretend this never happened, it was a matter of life and death.”
“I understand that.” You looked at him, fully looked at him. His gaze was low, his chest rising and falling quickly, his cheeks flushed. God, he looks wrecked.
Your eyes trailed over his body as he stood there, his hand on his hip as he popped his knee out. Your eyes moved down further, almost popping out of your head as you see how painfully hard he is pressed against his pants. 
“Are you-“ The words fall out of your mouth before you can think to stop them.
“Jesus.” Arthur sighed looking down, his hand rubbing his eyebrows.
“You are.” A nervous chuckle leaves your mouth as your eyes trailed up and down his body. You felt heat begin to spread between your thighs as he met your eyes. Your heart is still pounding against your rib cage from the encounter with the O’Driscolls. 
“I’m-“ He started throwing his hands up, “I’m sorry, alright but you can’t expect me- I’m only a man.” He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. 
“It’s nothing to be ashamed about.”
“Nothing to be ashamed-“ He cut you off, shaking his head, “There is plenty to be ashamed of, I shouldn’t be getting so… so worked up over you.” He said motioning to you. You couldn’t help that you were also getting worked up, you subtly rubbed your thighs together. Trying to get any friction where you needed it most. Heat bloomed in your stomach as the tension in the room only got worse. He furrowed his brows, studying you.
“Wait,” He chuckled, shaking his head, “You feel it too.” He said, crossing his arms.
You scoffed, looking off to the side. “You wish.” You said, hating the slight tremor in your voice. Arthur strode across the room, stopping in front of you. He reached towards you, tilting your chin so you would have to look at him. 
“Tell me you don’t want this.” He said softly, his other arm encircling your waist pulling you flush against him. You stayed silent, looking up into his blue eyes. Slowly a smirk worked its way onto his face, “That’s what I thought.” He chuckled, cupping your cheek. He leaned forward brushing his nose against yours. Giving you the option to pull away if you wanted, his eyes softening as he looked into yours. You took the plunge, capturing his lips against your own as you threaded your fingers through his hair.
A groan rumbled through his chest as his hand tightened around your waist. You felt dizzy as his lips moved against yours, his tongue swiping across your bottom lip. You opened your mouth allowing his access as he pressed into you deeper. He rubbed himself against you, his hips pressed against your lower belly. 
You pulled away, breathing hard as you looked up at him. His face was flushed, his mouth parted slightly as his chest rose and fell rapidly. You unbuttoned your blouse for the second time, just as feverishly as the first time, but now for a completely different reason. Arthur followed your lead, pushing his own suspenders down, his skillful fingers unbuttoning his own shirt. His eyes returned to your body as he ripped his shirt off of his shoulders, settling onto your breasts. He stared down at you, an almost predatory expression on his face. He closed the distance between you, his hand wrapping around your waist as the other kneaded your breast. You let out a soft gasp, which quickly turned to a moan as he ran his thumb over your perk nipple. 
“Arthur.” He stared down at you, his eyes darkening as he watched you shiver against him. He flipped you around, his hand pressing you down onto the bed. His other hand flipped your skirts up, before pulling down your underclothes. He let out a soft groan as his eyes connected with your almost dripping pussy.
“This all for me?” He cooed, swiping his finger through your folds. You gasped, nodding as your hands gripped the quilt. 
“Yes.” You breathed, “Yes all for you.”
“Good girl.” You could hear the smirk in his voice as he sunk a finger into your heat. You gasped as he slowly started pumping his finger inside of you. He leaned over you, his lips dangerously close to your ear. “Yeah you like that don’t you?” He said nibbling on your earlobe. Your breath hitched in your throat as he added another finger, scissoring them inside your walls.
“Fuck Arthur.” You melwed, pressing your forehead against the slightly scratchy quilt underneath you. “I need you.” You huffed, your walls clenching around his fingers.
“I’m gettin’ there.” He chuckled, pulling his finger out of you, you sighed at the loss. You could hear the rustling of clothing behind you, the distinctive metal on metal as you pulled off his belt. His warm calloused hands ran up your backside, gently spreading you before the head of his cock met your entrance. 
Jesus Christ he was big. 
He spit into his palm, pulling away as he spread his spit over the head of his cock. 
“What the hell is taking so long?” You asked impatiently, turning your head to look at him. His eyes met yours, a wicked grin on his face as he forcefully shoved his cock through your folds. It was like all the air had been knocked out of your lungs as you were propelled forward onto the bed. His hands pulled your hips back and speared you onto his dick. 
“Arthur!” You yelped, your fingers gripping the quilt as he thrust his pelvis flush to yours. 
“Christ woman.” He groaned, laying his forehead against your bare back. You moan as he pulls his hips back before thrusting back into you. “You sound even better when you ain’t faking it.” You can feel the chuckle rumble through his chest more than you can hear it as he speaks. 
“Arthur, Jesus." You pant, almost drooling over the way his cock hits that spot inside you over and over again. 
“Mmm.” He moans, tight lipped as he tilts his head back. You push back against him, meeting every one of his thrusts “Yeah, atta girl.” His praise only spurred you on, your thighs shaking as you pushed your ass against his pelvis. “You close?” He whispered, his warm hand moving down your thigh between your legs. His thumb circling your clit was enough to send you over the edge. You were grateful your upper half was supported by the plush bed as your legs gave out under you. A high pitched moan worked its way out of your chest as you all but collapsed on the bed. Your walls fluttered around him, milking his cock. 
“Shit.” He panted his breath fanning on your back as his forearms caged you in, his hips stuttering as he released his seed inside you. He groaned, resting his forehead against your back as he collapsed on you. His sweaty chest sticking against your back. He pulled out of you, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He whispered. 
“S’okay.” You said breathing hard, his cum seeping down your thighs. He kissed down your spine, his hand lovingly squeezing your hips. 
He grabbed a towel from the dresser, cleaning your thighs off. 
“Who would have thought you’d known about aftercare.” You chuckle softly, your heart rate slowly coming back to normal.
“There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me sweetheart.” He huffs, a small smirk on his face as he tucked himself back into his pants. He reached down, pulling your bloomers back up over your hips. 
“Oh yeah?” You chuckled, grabbing your blouse as he grabbed his shirt off the floor.
“Yeah, Mrs. Callahan.” He smirked walking towards you, buttoning his shirt as he stood in front of you. You rolled your eyes, buttoning your blouse. He wrapped his hand around your waist, pulling you flush against him.
“You can’t tell me you didn’t enjoy it.” He said, his hand trailing down your jaw. 
“Alright, fine. Mr. Callahan.” You huffed, a blush covering your cheeks as you rested your hands against his broad chest. 
“Next time,” He tightened his grip on your hips, his lips against your ear, “You’re riding me.”
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