#or homoromantic asexual

[beawritingbooks]

Here is how I explained asexuality to my mother:

*

My Mom: What exactly is asexual?

Me: It means that I experience little to no sexual attraction.

My Mom: I just don’t understand that. You thought [name redacted] was cute.

Me: I still think [name redacted] is cute. I just don’t experience any sexual attraction towards them.

My Mom: That doesn’t make any sense to me.

Me: Well, I can recognize when someone is ugly, cute, uniquely hot, and when they are considered sexy, but I still don’t experience sexual attraction to any of them.

My Mom: I’m not saying that you don’t feel this way, or that I don’t believe you, but how could that be possible?

Me: Okay, so, let’s say that I have 4 pairs of shoes in front of me. The first pair are crocs, the second pair are ballet flats, the third pair are those chunky spice girls platform sandals, and the fourth pair are red stilettos.

My Mom: Okay…

Me: Now, I would classify the crocs as an ugly shoe. Do you agree?

My Mom: Yes.

Me: I would classify the ballet flats as cute.

My Mom: So would I.

Me: I would classify the platform sandals as ugly-hot. I know you hate them, but they call to me, and I still love them to this day. Does that make sense?

My Mom: *laughing* Yes.

Me: Lastly, I would classify the red stilettos as hot and/or sexy. Like, that’s a sexy shoe.

My Mom: Absolutely!

Me: Okay, now, even though I can recognize that these shoes have varying degrees of attractiveness, I do NOT want to fuck the shoes…and that is also how I feel about people.

My Mom: Ooohhhh, that makes way more sense to me. I get it now. Well, I don’t “get it,” because I’m straight, but I understand what you mean.

*

Basically, this is how I felt trying to explain things:

[thatdamn-honeybadger]

Squeenix gave us a Sephiroth wallpaper with a goddamn rainbow in the background for the month of June.

June is pride month.

Coincidence? I think not.

[joespookyregardinghappenenings]

”oh i don’t know if i’m [thing] or [other thing]!”

TAKE BOTH.

do it.

BE BOTH

“but i can’t do that!”

who said you can’t?

if anyone did, fuck them, and be both.

[leikeliscomet]

It's okay to talk about how your romantic attraction overlaps with your asexuality. It's not greedy to want representation of both your romanticism and your asexuality together in 1 character. It's not a lesser form of asexual representation if the character has romantic attraction. It's not a lesser form of queer romantic representation if the character is asexual. You are not a lesser form of anything. You don't have to 'choose' whether your asexuality or your romanticism matters more. It's not amatornativity to want an asexual relationship for yourself or express your romantic attraction. It's not allonormative or gross to express your interest in the same gender if you have it. It's okay if sexual/romantic/platonic look and feel completely different to you. It's not automatically 'just sexual attraction then' if it involves anything physical. It's not a privilege to have romantic attraction if it's illegal, moralised or stigmatised despite being asexual. In case anyone needs to hear it.

[snowcapmt]

ITS GAY MONTH

[asexualenjolras]

Listen, I'm not saying that Edwin Payne is an asexual icon for the way he reacted in the Lust room of Hell, but I am saying that he was extremely real for screeching for Charles at the top of his lungs because he was surrounded by sex and lust.

And I am aware that context is important, and I know that he was in Hell and famously doesn't like people touching him because he's autistic but he's one of the most asexual coded characters I've ever seen and I will continue to project. Thank you.

[tiredangrydyke]

I’ll pay for your nails if you promise me they’ll be running through my hair later, preferably with you lying over my chest watching some random tv show I’m only watching because you like it:

[caelan-withadashofstress]

Hey, to anyone else in the LGBTQIA+ community:

I'm making an info-sheet for my therapist explaining different gender identities, sexual orientations, and romantic orientations, because she wants to be prepared whenever she has LGBT+ clients. (Also including some common slang terms, words and language not to use, info on polyamorous relationships/people, and some specific types of challenges that different orientations and gender identities face.)

If you're part of the community, can you please reblog or reply to this with info you think should be included? Even if I've already got whatever you mention written, it's still helpful to know! If you're not in the community or have nothing to say, please reblog anyway.

I also may make a separate sheet going over LGBTQ+ history and LGBTQ+ people in cultures throughout time and space, as well as mythology and folklore with queer elements. So I'd also like any of that that you can think of!

Oh, and I have a few specific questions (if any of these are offensive in any way, it is absolutely unintentional; please explain why it's offensive and ask me to correct it. I am autistic and do not always recognize when what I say is offensive):

1: To any omnisexuals, how would you describe the difference between omnisexual and bisexual? I have heard omnisexuals explain that the difference between omni and pan is that a partner's gender is still a factor for an omni person, even though they're attracted to all genders. If this is true, then how do you differentiate between bi and omni? Personally, why did you decide to identify as omnisexual vs bisexual or pansexual?

2: To the polysexual people out there, if it's not rude to ask, which genders / gender presentations are you NOT attracted to? I know that polysexual/polyromantic describes being attracted to multiple, but not all, genders. You don't have to explain why you're not attracted to that gender or genders - I know that there's usually no specific reason why people are or aren't attracted to certain genders. (As a quick aside, I'm also writing a novel with a polysexual main character, so this info would be helpful for multiple things I'm working on!)

3: For anyone else who experiences a third gender (or fourth, fifth, etc) which isn't necessarily "man" or "woman", what does that gender feel like for you? What pronouns do you prefer? Do you have a specific name for that gender? (As a genderfluid person, I experience a third gender, but I'm not great at describing it. So... y'know.)

4: For other genderfluid people: how do you know which gender you are from day to day? I'm not great at describing this for myself, despite being genderfluid. I mean, I just kinda know. Does anyone out there have a better way of describing it?

5: Heteroflexible and homoflexible peeps, what are the specific situations in which you feel attraction for the gender you aren't normally attracted to (assuming you feel comfortable answering)? Also, would you consider yourself to be under the monosexual or multisexual umbrella? Or do you consider yourself to be under neither? (I am generally grouping orientations by whether they fit into the asexual, monosexual, or multisexual umbrellas.)

6: Abrosexual people: do you consider yourself to be under the monosexual or multisexual umbrella, or do you think that you fit into a grey area in-between?

[spontaneousglitterbees]

happy pride to whatever these two have going on specifically

[anewgayeveryday]

Today's LGBT+ Character is;

Abbi Singh from The Imperfects-Asexual Lesbian

Requested by Anon

Status; Alive

[beawritingbooks]

Hi!

My name is Bea, and I am asexual/homoromantic.

Recently, I realized that I don't have many friends that are ace or aspec. That being said, I'd really like to cultivate a community of fellow aspec people.

So, I was wondering if any aspec people out there wanted to chat or be friends?

I am an adult, so this is MDNI. My rule is that I will only chat/be friends with other adults. Also, I mean no hate to allosexuals. You guys are great, and I truly appreciate and value my friendships with the allosexuals that I know! I just think it'd be nice to also talk to aspec people, as well.

If you interact with this post (like, reblog, and/or comment), I'll send you a message!

That is, unless I see in your bio that you are a minor. In which case, while I appreciate the engagement with this post, I will not send you a message.

Thanks for reading 💜

[dear-angel-lacy]

just an asexual lesbian waiting for the day someone asks for my romantic orientation alongside my sexuality 😔

[vampire-meta-knight]

Aces are queer BECAUSE they’re ace

It never ceases to piss me off that some ace exclusionists will claim you aren’t queer because you’re ace, but you are queer because you’re also homoromantic/biromantic/[insert any non-hetero and non-aro romantic attraction here].

I’m a sapphic ace. I am grayromantic, but the part of me that does feel romantic attraction feels it towards women, so I do identify with being a lesbian. However, I am far more of an asexual than a lesbian. I have more in common with asexuals, I am more impacted by my asexuality, and overall, it’s just a larger part of my identity and always has been. I knew I was ace long before I knew I liked girls.

I don’t fit in with allo lesbians--not all the way. There’s still that barrier there. I like women romantically and aesthetically, but not sexually. I can’t relate to a lot of lesbian experiences because of my lack of attraction and my sex-aversity, so although I still feel comfortable calling myself a lesbian, it doesn’t always feel like home in the same way “asexual” does.

Because I can relate to ace experiences. I do feel what aces feel. I feel the frustration of not being able to understand what allosexuals and alloromantics feel. I feel the anger at being the only one in a room who’s grossed out by sex and gets made fun of and infantilized for it. I feel the irritation at not being understood by those around you, how they just don’t understand that you aren’t interested in dating, don’t want to have sex, don’t find people attractive. I feel the internal pain of questioning yourself over and over, of feelings changing and wondering if you’ve been wrong about yourself all along, or feeling like you can’t change because you fear it would just prove everyone else right--that it was a “phase” and you did just need to “grow up” or “meet the right person” or “try it once to see if you like it” and denying your own complexity and fluidity to fit in the narrow box of what society thinks asexual is, all so they can’t invalidate you. I feel the despair at feeling broken, at fearing you’re missing out on something wonderful, at wishing you were something you weren’t just so you could fit in with everyone else and finally know what’s so great about being allo.

I am queer because I am ace. I am queer because I am grayromantic. I am queer because I’m sapphic. I am queer because I don’t belong with the alloromantic straights. I am queer because they way I view romance and sexuality is different from the mainstream.

My identity is shaped by many parts. I am queer because of all of them together, not by only one on its own.

[kitkatcatmeow]

ford is so aspec literally no one on planet earth will convince me he's not . that man is one of us

[hydor-soa]

Writing a fic about (source) me discovering my/his sexuality (gay) and actually discovering my orientation through the process (asexual and cupiogreyromantic) is quite the experience 😅. /lh /pos

[literaryspinster]

Category: Characters a lot of people think are gay that I personally think are ace.