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#corporate background check
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Tips To Employers Follow Prior Hiring Background Check Australia
When recruiting new employees, the background check process plays the most crucial role. It lets HR professionals take informed decisions regarding the safety of your organisation. But yes, carrying out background check Australia requires careful observation, patience, wittiness and compliance with the ethical codes. Thus, without wasting time, let’s look at the guidelines that HR experts need to follow.
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Having The Idea Regarding The Legal Necessities
Before consulting with background check Australia experts, know the local, federal and state laws. Knowing the hiring requirements will help you avoid legal obligations and liabilities.
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Having An Established Clear Set Of Policies And Rules
It would help if you established inclusive investigation rules and policies outlining the critical requisites of conducting background checks. It includes ideas regarding various consent forms, positions, and procedures needed for managing adverse situations. It would help if you put forward these policies, particularly to the stakeholders involved.
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Having Full Consent To The Disclosure And Consent Forms
You need to get the written consent form from the job applicants before conducting the background check Australia process. It would help if you handed over the applications with a disclosure form describing all the information that the company will acquire, the reasons for which it’s needed, and how you are going to use the information. In the meantime, clearly mention the content and timing of the disclosure forms.
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Accredited Background Check Providers Are Preferred 
the HR departments of respective companies should team up with accredited background check Australia partners. They need to validate that the providers should offer all the information with full reliability and accuracy. It would help if you said yes to the providers who will stick to the industry codes and practices. Also, offer complete security in terms of privacy and data.
Final Say
Thus, these are the guidelines that any HR department of a company should follow before hiring a criminal background check services provider.
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kittykatinabag · 2 months
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Bruh the "return-to-career-path-program" position I've been getting stringed along for like 2 months now through interviews and multi-week ghostings finally admitted that they can't find a good match for me in their program.
This is readily apparent to me by the second interview with the actual guy who would have been my boss when I asked him about what would happen if there hypothetically wouldn't be enough billable work and he did not have an answer for me.
And the recruiter lady had the gall to lie and say the interview I had went "very well" and that the guy I was talking to "very much enjoyed meeting me"
lol. lmao even.
Yeah, never applying for consulting jobs again.
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maraschinotopped · 1 year
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tried my hand at drawing some of the other managers as well :)
bonus fucked up looking chip when i attempted to draw him for the first time without realizing how his face actually worked
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youtube
How to Detective work? What should if do before assign a case for detective.
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techsagacorporation · 9 months
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In an era where information is at our fingertips, businesses and organizations are rapidly changing their hiring process. Conducting the proper background verification of every employee is a significant part of the hiring process. There are numerous ways of doing this, however, background check software is making the process more easier and effective.
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truskillsforce · 1 year
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the-witchhunter · 1 year
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You know, if Spider Punk gets people interested in punk, good. We all have to start somewhere and Hobie is a damn good representation. If he is what makes a person go “hey, this seems cool, I should check it out.” good. That’s one more person interested in punk and wanting to get into it. 
That being said, if you are new to punk(hi baby punks!) some things to keep in mind
1. Punk philosophy is largely anti-authoritarian. Individual and even punk communities differ on specifics, and some are more political than others, but the core themes tend to be resisting those who would control and oppress us, and supporting and including people in your community
2. Punk fashion SHOULD NOT BE EXPENSIVE. A lot of fashion companies will try and sell you jackets for a couple hundred bucks, but that’s just corporations trying to cash in on a subculture. A big part of Punk and its history is DIY because Punk should be open to everyone and putting that behind a fashion paywall is just not punk. You don’t even need to be dressing punk to BE punk, but thrift your clothes. Make stencils and use spray paint or bleach to give it a pattern. Use old jeans to make patches. Buy your spikes and studs in bulk and go wild. Turn your old t shirt that doesn't fit anymore into a back patch. Go crazy with some safety pins. You can make more with $30 than you can buy from a designer for $300. And skill is not needed, frankly if it looks a little wonky it makes it look more punk
3. Dental floss makes for good thread for sewing on patches. It’s good for thick, stylistic stitches and is both cheap and durable. Don’t know why I made this its own point but it’s one of the most common tricks for punk DIY besides taking paint to scraps of fabric to make a patch. Honestly, if you want to know how to do more, just ask other punks how they made their vests and jackets, they’ll probably be happy enough to tell you
4. Punk philosophy and music is closely related. The communities evolved around the music scene so it is closely linked. Give some punk bands a try if you haven't already. There’s a bunch of subgenres so you’ll probably find something you like. From OG “proto punk” where the sound was still developing into what we call punk, to pop punk, anarco punk, and folk punk. There are people who say you can’t be punk if you don’t listen to the music, and there’s a whole conversation to be had about all that, but it’s just a good idea to try listening to some punk music
5, Nazis fuck off
6. Seriously, nazis fuck off. There’s a whole history behind it and why we associate skinhead punks with neo nazis. Largely we’ve made it clear we don’t want nazis in our community and the street punk music scene that nazi punks became associated with has made strides to separate themselves from that.
7. Be cool and respectful of people regardless of religion, ethnicity, race, sexuality, gender, background, etc. Solidarity with our community is important and all sorts are welcome. Gatekeeping isn’t cool and frankly women and minorities have done a lot for punk as a whole. Respect for everyone
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incorrectbatfam · 7 months
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Damian being a gen alpha implies in gen alpha Jon too ...
[at a sleepover]
Damian, whispering: Jon?
Jon: Yeah?
Damian: Our planet is doomed.
Jon: Yeah, it is.
Jon: Wanna sneak downstairs for snacks?
Damian: Sure.
———————
Steph, as a Batburger cashier: Sorry ma'am, that product was discontinued months ago.
Jon: *secretly starts recording*
Margie: You didn't even bother to check! What kind of lazy service is this? No wonder the world is the way it is with your generation. I should call the corporate hotline right now and report you for refusing to serve a paying customer. See how you like it when you lose your job.
Damian: Hey Karen, she said they don't have it anymore. Either get something else or leave. Some of us have places to be.
Margie: And who do you think you are?
Damian, pointing to Jon's camera: The best friend of someone with 150,000 followers.
Jon: Say hi to the internet!
———————
Damian and Jon: *putting up hand-drawn posters around town*
Comm. Gordon: What are you kids doing?
Damian: Advertising our joint channel.
Jon: We're gonna have an epic Cheese Viking and Fortnite mashup tournament.
Damian: Proceeds go to the Wayne Foundation.
Comm. Gordon: *scribbles a note and hands it to them*
Comm. Gordon: If anyone asks you for a permit, it's on me.
———————
Damian and Jon: *huddled around the Batcomputer*
Jon: I think we should sort it by distance instead.
Damian, typing code: Good idea.
Barbara: What's that?
Jon: Our new website.
Damian: It allows people to report stray animals they see without the risk that comes with physical contact.
Barbara: Oh, cool. Carry on.
———————
Kara: What do you want to drink?
Jon: Mountain Dew. Dami, you want one?
Damian: Depends. Is it vegan?
Kara: *starts typing into Google*
Jon: Hey Alexa, is Mountain Dew vegan?
———————
[texting]
Jon: Dami, get on Discord.
Damian: Why?
Jon: Live-action One Piece streaming in the Gay Minecraft server.
———————
Jon: Ms. Kyle, check it out!
Selina: What is it?
Damian: TikTok added a set of Catwoman stickers.
Selina: Show me.
———————
Kate: I still think you are far too young for things like Instagram.
Damian and Jon: *snicker*
Kate: What?
Jon: Well, Ms. Kane, how should we put it...
Damian: No one uses Instagram anymore.
———————
Jon: *takes a 0.5 of him and Damian with Dick in the background*
Damian: You're in our BeReal now. Deal with it.
Dick: What's a BeReal?
———————
Damian, handing Jon a rock: I would like to buy this playhouse.
Jon: Too bad, the economy just disappeared.
Lois: What are you doing?
Jon: We're playing Society.
———————
Damian: Alfred, we're hungry.
Alfred, on the phone: *makes the thumb and pinky gesture and mouths "I'm busy"*
Jon: Huh?
Alfred: I'm on the phone, boys.
Damian: I think he meant this.
Damian: *puts his palm to his ear*
———————
Jon: Parkour!
Jon: *hops over a log*
Jon: Parkour!
Jon: *climbs a tree*
Damian: *recording*
Clark, to Bruce: That's one way to play.
Bruce: Mhm.
Clark: Do you ever get worried about, you know, how these kids are turning out?
Jon: Parkou—
Damian: Wait, stop, there's a bird's egg here. I wonder what species it is.
Jon: I have an app that can scan it.
Bruce, to Clark: I think they're gonna be alright.
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eilidh-eternal · 9 months
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You have a secret
Part of the Metanoia series | Part 1 | Masterlist |
| SingleDad!Johnny x f!reader | 18+ MDNI | CW death of a loved one, grief, attempted SA, Johnny and reader are going through it |
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Glasgow is cold in January.
Hogmanay came and went with the typical rambunctious celebrations, every bar and pub in the city overflowing with patrons that spill out onto the pavement and the streets, properly drunk and stumbling over one another as they make their way to the next bar. Some of your coworkers invited you out for a bar crawl, just as they did last year, but you’d decided going out in the freezing weather and nursing a hangover at work in the morning isn’t worth the trouble. So home you stay, curled up with cheap Tesco sparkling wine and the last book on your reading list for the year, the tv playing a montage of celebrations across the city quietly in the background, and you slink off to bed just as the fireworks settle and the night falls quiet.
The days that follow are quiet too, the first week of the new year creeping along in the hazy in between, that little reset that comes between the holiday season and the yawning winter that looms before you, corporate deadlines and end of fiscal year reports that will start to pile up soon. You enjoy the quiet calm of that in between, try to remember what it feels like to be able to step away from your desk and take a lap around the office to stretch your legs before you’re inundated with so many reports you hardly have time to break away to use the restroom. 
Johnny frequents your thoughts more than you'd like to admit as you stroll around the office floor, wondering if he's operating in the same lull as you are, biding his time until his next assignment with dull busywork and monotonous routine. Wondering if he and Isobel had celebrated Hogmanay at home like you had or if maybe he’d taken her to a friends flat with him, one of his team members. Wondered if he let her stay up late with him and counted down the fireworks display together, or if he tucked her into a spare bedroom some hours before, waking her up just in time to see them and take her home to her own bed for the night. 
The growing tinge of disappointment hung like storm clouds over your mood when you hadn’t seen much of them in the days leading up to the new year, and you began to think maybe all the smiles, all the double entendres, were just a friendly personality and polite kindness on his part; just a neighbor being neighborly. There was an exchange of phone numbers with the offer to call or text one another if the other ever needed anything after dinner several weeks ago. Hardly an invitation for conversation. Another polite exchange and thanks for your mutual goodwill. 
Pretending not to care, to resist the urge to check your phone whenever it vibrates on your desk or in your back pocket, takes more effort than you had expected. It’s not him. Why would it be him? It’s not like he said he would call.
But Johnny has a habit of surprising you.
Snow and lights and festive wreaths don’t hold the same wonderment they used to. They all remind him of her. Remind him how she always insisted on a big family dinner. How she was always the one who invited everyone to their home and always had his favorite scotch on hand to toast with at midnight. The lights remind him of flashing red and blue, screaming sirens that cut through the air like the mournful wail of a banshee. The snow covered roads look too much like the roads did that day, tires slipping and sliding, the tail end of his car nearly spinning him out on the highway in his desperation to get to her. 
And the quiet.
The quiet of the world when snow falls and blankets the earth in layers of glittering sorrow makes the silence deafening. Her laughter doesn’t echo Isobels, there are no footsteps mirrored in the snow beside hers, and the tiny angel in the front yard stares up at the clouds where its missing guardian watches over them. It’s hard, for both of them. Isobel doesn't remember the accident, doesn’t remember riding in the ambulance with her mother or the way the security guard and several nurses had to hold Johnny back when she coded. She doesn't remember the tears, the anger, the denial of everything unfolding in front of him, crumbling around him and knocking the air from his lungs, leaving him crumpled on the floor outside her room. 
Isobel didn’t see how he sat slumped against the wall with his head between his knees, arms folded over his legs and fingers digging into his skin until the blunt edges of his nails drew blood. She never saw the procession of doctors and nurses that slowly filed out of the room, the only sound in the somber silence the soft tapping of rubber soles on tile. No beeping from monitors, no clicks and whooshes of the ventilator. Heavy, suffocating silence.
The social worker sat with him, let him fall apart right there on the hospital floor, a sympathetic hand resting on his trembling shoulder as he poured his heart out onto the cold, sterile white tile beneath him. When the silence became unbearable, when it started clawing at his skull and slicing into his skin like razor wire, he let her fill it. He listened to her tell him that Isobel is okay–scared, in shock–but alive and breathing. Lets her lead him through more sterile hallways to an office where another social worker does their best to occupy the tiny girl, but the minute Johnny walks through that door she’s all trembling hands and watery eyes, wobbly chin and confused tears.
He does his best not to let her see it, not when the snow is still full of magic and the lights still make her eyes bright with joy, pure and unbridled. But it's hard to hide the grief that dulls his own, the wintery haze that hardens them into icy pools that long for the warmth of summer skies. It’s hard to step outside and breathe the crisp winter air and not feel his throat constrict, feel the warmth seep from his body, replaced with the empty cold of a world without her in it.
Sometimes he can hear little bits of her in the way Isobel laughs, can see the same stubborn crease of her brow when she can’t quite figure something out and refuses to ask for his help. He sees the same light and spark in her eyes, the same mischief that they once shared through the years, and he can't bear to dim that light, to extinguish the joy and happiness that lives there.
It was a quiet holiday for the two of them. No big parties, no dinner and drinks, despite John's invitation. Just Johnny and Isobel, cuddled up together on the couch watching movies and sharing bites of whatever snack or dessert the other brought with them. He thought about texting you, asking if you had plans to go out, or maybe stay in. Isobel came trotting back from the kitchen, one of the cookies the two of you had made together in-hand, and clambered onto his lap, peering at the unsent message to you on his phone screen.
“What’s it say?” She squints her little eyes at the letters, still not quite able to put the words together.
“Nothin’, leannan.” The words disappear from the text field and he tosses his phone aside to settle his arms around her. “Did ye bring one for me?” She shakes her head no but breaks off a chunk and offers it up to him. “Thank ye.” He leans forward to take it from her, takes the bite straight from her hand, and her delighted giggles fill the gaping hole in his chest with comforting warmth.
Cinnamon and pine still lingers in the air, mingled with the scent of paper and ink, with the warm coffee several customers clutch between cold fingers. With boxing day and the holidays behind them, the shops are much less overwhelming at this time of year, most of the aisles in the book store blessedly empty and the silence only occasionally interrupted by the fluttering of pages or soft footsteps on carpeted floors. The perfect atmosphere for strolling between shelves and taking the time to read more than the blurb on the inside cover of a book before adding it to the small collection already cradled in your arms. It’s the perfect, quiet afternoon until it’s not. Until the silence is broken and every hair on the back of your neck is standing at attention.
“Well, lookit you. Pretty little thing, aren’t ya?” The words are clumsily spoken, slurred and hot against your cheek where his breath fans across clammy skin, sour and putrid, reeking of alcohol and god knows what else. He plucks the book from your hands, works hard to focus his eyes as he surveys the cover art and skims through a passage from the middle of the book. You stumble back a step, heels catching on the shelf behind you and nearly sending a few of the more precariously shelved titles tumbling to the ground. He follows, the only space between him and you created by the book in his hands, and you clutch your little stack tighter to your chest, willing hardbacks and delicate pages to become armor. “This isn’t the kinda stuff a little lady should be readin’.” He waves the book in your face, braces a hand on the shelf beside your head when he teeters off balance, and leans far too close, crowds you back against the shelf until the wood digs into your shoulder blades.
A glance at either end of the aisle reveals nothing but empty rows of shelves and not a soul in sight, no one to come to your rescue.
“I-I can read what I want. Please leave me alone, sir.”
“This is pure filth,” he sneers, shoving the book back at you. It lands on the floor at your feet with a fluttering ‘thump’ and the shelving behind you creaks as you try to maintain some distance from him. You wish that the novels at your back would open their covers and draw you in, hide you between the inked words within their pages. “Worse than porn, this is. ‘S not even any good. Why read this shite when you can have the real thing?” His hand dips down to fumble with something beneath his coat and you hear the metal teeth of a zipper unfurling.
You know what’s happening, know what you’ll see if you look down. You know that you should push and shove and yell and scream, but you can’t. Fear and realization settle heavy against your body, fog your mind with a haze so thick your vision turns blurry at the edges, and when you open your mouth to speak the only thing that comes out is a strangled, muted gasp as he presses his full body weight against you, searing heat pressed firm against your stomach and pinning you in place. 
Everything feels slow and blurry. Like you're underwater, trying to run across the bottom of the ocean, salt water stinging your eyes. The dread that weighs so heavily on your chest keeps you there, refusing to let you surface, refusing to let you draw more than shallow breaths that feel like lungfuls of water instead.
Something cuts through the depths. A noise. Someone's shouting. Angry. And then that weight on your chest, the weight that pins your body to the shelf, is gone. You still can’t breathe, salt water still blurs your vision, distorts the movement in front of you and leaves you disoriented, unsteady on your own feet. There’s more noise, softer this time.
An employee. She’s asking you something. Asking if you’re ok. You let her guide you, away from the aisle to a back room to sit in a chair and drink water from a paper cup while she calls the police. She stays with you until they get there and while they ask you questions, sits in silent support beside you and refills your water when you need it. The police leave, tell you that if they see the man he’ll be picked up, and the younger woman asks if you want to call someone to get you, to drive you home.
The thought of anyone else seeing you, talking to you, trying to touch you, makes your stomach twist with nausea. So you drive yourself home, empty book bag tossed in the seat beside you, no music to fill the silence. You don’t quite know how you got there, sitting in your car outside your house. Can’t remember making the turn down your street or how long ago you killed the engine.
Long enough for Johnny to take notice, it seems. He’s knocking on the window, calling your name, and it startles you. Drags you up from the quiet depths of your mind and sets your heart racing. Too fast. Too much. The car is too small, the seat belt too tight across your chest, and you need out. He nearly gets hit with the door, dodges heavy metal as it swings open suddenly, and his brows slope together in concern when he sees your shaking hands, sees the way you won’t look at his face.
“Wa’s wrong, bonnie? Wha’ hap-” You shove the door closed behind you, brush him off and skitter around him, won’t come within more than a few meters of him, and he calls after you as you climb the stairs to your door, hurriedly fitting the key in the lock. “Have I done-” 
You don't hear the rest of his sentence, and Johnny is left dumbstruck at the bottom of the steps, the slam of your front door and the sound of the deadbolt clicking into place ringing in his ears like he’s stood too close to a grenade.
Next>>>
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©️Eilidh-Eternal.2024 ~ The intellectual property of Eilidh-Eternal is not permitted for reposting, transcription, translation or use with AI technologies.
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afloweroutofstone · 2 months
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Would love to hear more about your personal take on Walz, if you feel like it.
He's the most progressive of the Boring White Guys who were on Harris' shortlist for VP. To be fair, he's not actually that progressive himself— his record in congress was quite moderate, and he's generally seen as being more moderate than the Democrats in the Minnesota state legislature. But this image as a Normie Democrat can actually pair quite well with his record of progressive accomplishments in office. The stuff he's signed into law while governor has been absolutely incredible, arguably enough to make him the best governor in the country right now (even if the hard work behind most of these reforms came from state legislators to his left).
This is the gubernatorial record that Walz can run on: protecting abortion rights, universal school meals, guaranteed paid leave, legalizing weed, a plan for 100% renewable energy, banning LGBTQ conversion therapy, free college for families earning less than $80,000, automatic voter registration, increasing spending for public schools, universal gun background checks, expanding public transit, strengthening workers' rights, improving infrastructure, new public housing, (underwhelming) police reform, banning non-compete agreements, a strong child tax credit, and more. To compare, Harris' other top choice was a guy who compared pro-Palestine protesters to the KKK, likes charter schools, and wants to cut his state's corporate tax rates. You can see why progressives are happy with Walz as the outcome.
Also Walz does seem to have an electable personality IMO, what little I've seen of him makes him look like a good messenger. VP picks don't really matter that much, but he seems like a good choice if they're looking for someone to wipe the floor with Vance in the debate.
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frankierohugejorts · 2 years
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i finally managed to talk to the manager and he said he was very interested in hiring me but there's some weird IT thing happening and basically my application has disappeared so now he's waiting for corporate to email him back abt fixing it, and since he's off tmrw he can't follow up with them until friday, so i probably won't hear anything until the beginning of next week
anyway it's still a maybe and he said maybe pretty specifically, but it sounds like a firm maybe and it's definitely not an immediate rejection!!
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Mistakes that you stay away from while finalising any private investigation service company
You hire Private investigation services to gather information and resolve personal, legal or corporate matters. But yes, you need to too cautious enough because, like in any other industry, there are common mistakes that clients can make when engaging private investigators. This blog will outline the most common mistakes to avoid when hiring personal investigation services.
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● Not thoroughly researching the private investigation firm: This is one of the biggest mistakes clients can make. Not researching the private investigation firm and its background can lead to severe consequences, such as an inexperienced investigator who cannot deliver the desired results or even a fraudulent company. Before hiring any private investigation services, do a thorough background check on the company, read online reviews and check if they have a valid license.
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● Not being clear with the objective of the investigation: Clients should always have a clear understanding of what they want to achieve from the investigation and communicate this clearly to the investigator. This will help the Surveillance investigator understand the client's expectations and work towards achieving the desired results.
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● Interfering with the investigation: Let the investigator do their job without any interference is essential. Clients may want to stay involved in the investigation process, but it is crucial to understand that private investigators have the training and experience to gather information effectively and efficiently. Interfering with the investigation can lead to inaccurate results and even legal consequences.
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● Not having a budget: Hiring a private investigator can be expensive. It is essential to have a budget in mind and communicate this to the investigator before the start of the investigation. This will help the investigator understand the client's financial constraints and work towards a solution within their budget.
Final Thought
Go through the above outlined pointers and find out the mistakes you should never ever repeat while recruiting the private investigation companies. Besides that, never forget to quickly go through the tips and decide the best one.
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knightoflightandprisms · 11 months
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What each kid would be if they hadn't ended the world
John: Never has a single job for more than a year. Has done everything at least once.
Rose: English major that then ended up at a bland desk job. She has a few published works.
Dave: You know those kids that became teachers because one teacher saved their life growing up by just being the only adult who would listen? Dave's a teacher.
Jade: Physicist. She can't vent about her work because none of her friends would pass a security background check. She shouldn't be able to pass one either but the Feds never found that out.
Jane: Corporate if you want her to be miserable. Owning a Cafe if you want her to be happy.
Dirk: Engineer. Have you ever met an Engineer? Dirk is just the right kind of autistic to be an Engineer.
Jake: Ecologist. He spends his days hiking through swamps to find and catalogue fungus and he is the happiest he could possibly be. He somehow manages to get bit by something on every outing.
Roxy: Have you ever met those cyber security people who have done every single drug known to man and are actual wizards? Like John McAfee if he was a very different kind of nuts.
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indigovigilance · 11 months
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Continuity Errors
Crowley can stop time. We’ve noticed buggy things about time. Let’s talk about it.
I’m going to start with an overview of every time he has definitely frozen time in order to establish the mechanics of Crowley’s time-stopping power in the GO universe. Then, I’m going to talk about other events where Crowley may have stopped time, and it wasn’t (directly) shown to the audience.
or read this 3,500 word beast of a meta on Ao3
edit: if you're deciding whether or not to read this, check out the reblog notes!
Opening obligatory "do not put anything about this in Neil Gaiman's askbox"
Crowley freezes time locally, selectively exempting individuals
S1E2
In S1E2, Crowley freezes time at the corporate training ground to interrogate Mary Hodges, formerly Sister Mary Loquacious (played by Nina Sosanya, actor for Nina in S2). It may seem like she’s just hypnotized and time is progressing normally around all of them, but that isn’t the case. Immediately before Crowley hypnotizes Hodges, we can hear gunfire in the background; a few seconds before Hodges is released from the trance, we hear shouting and sirens. But during the time that Hodges is entranced, all we hear is three things: the dialogue, music, and what sounds like the ticking of a kitchen timer. 
We could do a little bit of extrapolation from the fact that the beginnings of gunshots and siren sounds are temporally very close together, especially depending on how we measure time. Crowley turns the paintball guns into deadly weapons at 36:59. Crowley freezes Mary Hodges at 38:47. A ticking sound starts the same moment. We also hear what we will come to recognize as the “pause time” sound, a sort of wobbly sound. The ticking sound seems to stop around… 40:07? Right before the line about lovely little toesy woesies? It’s unclear with the overlapping tracks. At 40:11 Crowley says “let’s go” and we can hear sirens in the background start now. Aziraphale then snaps his fingers and unfreezes Hodges at 40:17.
So during 191 seconds of screentime, 84 seconds of it was spent with time frozen, if I accept the ticking sound to be the indicator. If time was only frozen locally, meaning just the paintball grounds and not the nearest police station and roads leading to it, then emergency services had just over three minutes from the time the first live round was fired to arrival. If time was actually frozen globally except for Crowley, Azirarphale, and Hodges, then emergency services got there in 85 seconds, or less than a minute and a half. Maybe Britain is doing something wildly different than here idk but I think the more likely explanation for the event timing is that Crowley is only freezing time in a local bubble. The shooters stop shooting but the police are still driving towards them while Crowley and Aziraphale are interrogating an entranced Mary Hodges.
The case with Hodges is kind of confusing because the audience is presented with a false dichotomy between “frozen in time” and “hypnotized.” It’s actually both. Crowley has frozen time around the three of them, but Hodges, like Aziraphale, was exempt. It just so happens that she was also entranced at the same time, which explains as well why Aziraphale can release her from the trance, since our best evidence indicates that he can’t control time.
S1E3 & S2E3
In S1E3, Crowley freezes Jean Claude, the executioner at the Bastille. Immediately before, we can hear the guillotine, screaming and jeering outside the cell. As soon as Jean Claude is frozen, however (13:29, complete with wobble sound), there is complete background silence, except for the dialogue between our ineffable aristocrats. When Crowley restarts time, background noise restarts as well. This evidence indicates that Crowley froze time for the surrounding area as well as inside the cell.
In S2E3, Crowley freezes Mr. Dalrymple. We don’t have definitive information about how much of the rest of the world is affected since the scene takes place indoors on a quiet night and there are no external cues of time starting or stopping.
S1E6: Freezing Out Satan
In S1E6, not only are Crowley, Aziraphale, and Adam pulled out of the normal flow of time: it seems that they are also pulled out of normal space. They appear to be in an ethereal desert where we can see their wings, but we don’t actually know where they are. The way we enter, inhabit, and then exit this time-stop is completely different from any of the other three explicit timestop scenes: Crowley must use his whole body to summon the power to cast the miracle, they travel elsewhere, then he must use his crankshaft to exit the time-stop.
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I take this to indicate that freezing time when Satan is near takes a lot more power than freezing time around Mary Hodges, Jean Claude, or Mr. Dalrymple. Presumably, the power a being has, the more power it takes to lock them out of a bubble to stopped time.
Time Stop Mechanics
Here are my key takeaways from analyzing these four scenes:
Crowley isn’t so much freezing all of time as pulling himself and Aziraphale (and sometimes Adam) out of the flow of time. The effort this takes is dependent on the entities that they are “pulling away” from. It is easy to pull away from humans, so much so that they don’t have to pull away very far and can occupy the same space in a bubble of paused time. When he is “pulling away” from Satan, however, he must pull away much further, all the way to another plane.
Crowley’s ability is so powerful that he can use it to escape Satan. He could use it to lock out other powerful beings, if he wanted to, but it would take a lot of effort.
Aziraphale, a being with power somewhere on the spectrum between human and Satan, could be frozen by Crowley’s powers. The fact that Aziraphale is still present and active during all of these scenes, unaffected by the time stop is only indicative of Crowley’s choice to exempt him, just as he does with a hypnotized Mary Hodges and Adam.
Crowley has stopped time on Aziraphale
In a previous post I have addressed the possible symbolic meaning behind the Honolulu Roast sign that suddenly appears behind Crowley in the S2E1 coffee shop scene. This addresses the symbolic meaning of Honolulu with respect to Aziraphale, but fails to address the “roast” part, which I have the opportunity to do now. I begin by establishing two premises:
Crowley loves Aziraphale and after 6,000 years knows him very well.
Crowley is a dick.
Crowley sits down at the table across from Aziraphale and asks him what the problem is. At this point, there is no “Honolulu Roast” sign behind him. The camera flips to Aziraphale as he (badly) tries to deny that there is any problem. When the camera flips back to Crowley, a “today’s special: Honolulu Roast” sign has appeared behind him.
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What does Crowley do next?
Crowley roasts Aziraphale.
Crowley proceeds to read Aziraphale to filth, rattling off all his tells and putting him in his place for even daring to think that he could mislead Crowley about his internal emotional state.
While we’ve seen a lot more of his soft side this season, we cannot forget that the demon Crowley, at the end of the day, is a prick. He really did pause time just so that he could go get a chalkboard, write a pun on it, and hang it on the wall behind him like a display card for open mic night. He’s still going to help Aziraphale, of course. But he’s going to make fun of him first.
Let me reiterate: Crowley literally paused time, got up from the table, put up this sign, then sat back down in (as close to) exactly the same position (as possible) to fool Aziraphale into not noticing the pause, because this joke is entirely for Crowley’s own amusement. We have some cinematographic evidence of this besides just the sign itself: the lamp behind him has moved slightly, and the camera angle focusing on Crowley has changed. Literally, the left hand side of the frame gets cut off due to the repositioning. From a production perspective, this scene would have been shot all at the same time, so should not have changed angles. That said, they did a by-hand follow-in of Crowley walking in and sitting down, then switched to a dolly, but… I have faith that they could have matched the shot line-up practically pixel for pixel if they wanted to. All to say: changing the camera position before and after, alongside the other conspicuous changes, seems like it was a deliberate framing choice used to indicate that Crowley tried his best to get back into exactly the same position, but was just a little off.
But Crowley’s prank is troubling from a perspective of honesty and agency. Based on the way the dialogue progresses, it seems pretty clear that Aziraphale doesn’t know that he was frozen. Whether or not Crowley could freeze Aziraphale was beside the point until this scene where we learn that Crowley would, even for a really dumb reason like making a joke at Aziraphale’s expense.
Before moving on, I want to note that the sudden appearance of this sign could be characterized as a continuity error, even though it was the result of a deliberate action by an in-world character. Jettison your traditional understanding of “continuity error” as “production made a mistake.” In this universe, we can have continuity errors by virtue that Aziraphale is experiencing time as if it is continuous, not noticing that he functionally blacked out for a few minutes and that things have changed around him. This is not a show-level continuity error. This is an Aziraphale-level continuity error.
Crowley can reverse time
Credit where credit is due: it was this comment on the Ao3 version of my meta, The Erasure of Human!Metatron, that became an earworm that got me thinking specifically about Crowley's abilities:
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So thank you, LoveIsLove <3
Let’s go back to the Mary Hodges scene, or actually a few minutes before. Our ineffable idiots get shot by paintballs.
“Look at the state of this coat. I've kept this in tip-top condition for over 180 years now. I'll never get this stain out.”
“You could miracle it away.”
“Hmm… Yes, but… well, I would always know the stain was there. Underneath, I mean.”
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Aziraphale finagles himself a favor without ever actually asking for it. Full points, princess. But let’s examine the actual content of the dialogue. This cannot be a complete 100% bluff; Aziraphale is not going to tell a straight lie to Crowley that they both know is false about the respective nature of their powers. It must be the case that there is some truth to this statement. There is a fundamental difference between what Aziraphale can do about the paintball stain and what Crowley is actually going to do about it. Furthermore, what Crowley does is something different than a miracle.
Crowley then blows on the stain, it disappears, and Aziraphale looks quite pleased. Yes, yes, he cajoled Anthony J Acts of Service Crowley into doing his signature move, but also, he’s genuinely thankful that Crowley did something for him that he couldn’t do for himself, because miracles don’t work like that. Notably, Crowley doesn't snap his fingers or make any other gesture that we normally associate with miracles, and we don’t hear the miracle sound, which is further evidence that this is not a miracle, but something different.
If you haven’t already, please read my meta entitled Jimbriel, Satan, the Book of Life, and what it means for Crowley. It explains in depth and with evidentiary support my theory about how erasure works in the Good Omens universe. The Cliff’s notes version is that erasing something, whether it be a name from the Book of Life or a paintball from a coat, is akin to erasing a pencil mark on paper; it’s technically gone but you’ll always know it was there. Underneath.
What Crowley has done, then, is not erasing the paintball stain.
He’s reversed it.
When he blows on the paintball stain, he is reversing time in a microcosm of the universe, truly making it so that the paintball never hit the jacket. In a world full of rubber erasers, Crowley has the only Control-Z. When things are “erased” by the Book of Life, they are changed, but when Crowley reverses something, they never happened (making Beelzebub’s description of the Book of Life actually a more accurate description of Crowley’s power). It is something unique that Crowley can do that Aziraphale can’t, and we haven’t seen any evidence of any other celestial being pausing or reversing time. Please feel free to reblog with links to relevant meta if I’m wrong about that.
In true Neil Gaiman style, Crowley using this power to do something mundane like get rid of paintball paint was an incredibly benign and subtle way to indicate that Crowley has an immense, untapped power that we have not yet seen him use for any major purpose. 
I repeat: we didn’t see him use it. Because usually, like Aziraphale, we the audience are exempt from the time freeze, and we get to watch what happens. But this time, we were frozen out with Aziraphale.
Clock Theory revisited: a reinterpretation of “continuity error”
A summary of clock theory
Neil Gaiman’s ask and answer on clock theory
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Neil Gaiman responded to an ask about the clock jumping forward from 9:25 to 9:40 before and after the kiss with a single sentence: “It’s a continuity error, I’m afraid.”
In the usual manner, Neil is not lying, but he is relying on you making an incorrect interpretation of his seemingly straightforward and innocuous but actually ambiguous and incredibly meaningful statement. As I stated with regards to the Honolulu Roast chalkboard sign, do not interpret “continuity error” as “production made a mistake.” Interpret “continuity error” as “Aziraphale believes that his experience of time is in lockstep with the actual flow of time and doesn’t realize that 11 minutes passed while he was frozen.”
Let’s consider the evidence:
Image at timestamp 41:04 “[Hold that thought!]” the clock reads 9:25
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Image at 45:04 “If Gabriel and Beelzebub can go off together, then we can” the clock still reads 9:25
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Image at 47:56 the clock now reads 9:40. 
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Image at 48:14 the clock reads 9:40
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There are two four-minute gaps, from the perspective of the viewer, and we have views of the clock face at both ends of each gap.
Gap 1, from 41:04 to 45:04, the clock hands do not move at all, nor do they in any of the intervening shots.
Gap 2, from 45:04 to 47:56 (or 48:14, as you prefer), the clock hands move 15 minutes.
The Occam’s razor, Doylian explanation for why the clock hands don't move from 41:04 to 45:04 is that the clock is a prop. It does not have any timekeeping mechanism, the hands don’t move unless some human being opens up the glass, reaches in there, and manually adjusts it. They weren’t going to interrupt filming this moving scene to move the clock hands minute by minute, so it seems pretty plausible that the fact that it doesn’t move is just an artifact of production limitations.
The Watsonian explanation, which I do not favor, is that Crowley has frozen time for just the two of them. They are in a microcosm all their own. If true, this would have an abundance of implications, such that they are actually free to speak to each other freely, which they don’t. So I feel like with that alone, we can set this aside, but I’m open to being convinced otherwise.
If we accept the “clock is a prop” explanation for Gap 1, it doesn’t really hold for Gap 2 that they moved it a full fifteen minutes. So much care and attention to detail was given for all other parts of this show; I don’t realistically believe that a production staff member moved the hands a random amount. The music carries us from Crowley’s exit to Metatron’s entrance seamlessly, yet more time seems to have passed in-world than on-screen. There are two possible explanations:
There was more material that was supposed to be filmed to account for 15 minutes that got cut
We are supposed to figure out that there’s some “Greek play” style shenaniganery afoot
I will debunk explanation #1 with simply this: David’s contact lenses would sometimes rotate so that the slit pupils were not vertical. This error was fixed by VFX in post.
You might assume, when watching Good Omens, that Crowley’s serpent-like eyes are created using contact lenses. Or perhaps you’d presume they’re CGI. Actually, they’re a mix of both.
“The CGI versions were usually because the contact lenses had swiveled in David’s eyes … and we had to fix it,” says Mackinnon.
If they could fix Crowley’s eyes in post, there is absolutely no reason to expect that they couldn’t or wouldn’t have fixed the clock hand positions in post, especially if it was someone’s job to reach in there and change the positions to try to maintain set continuity in the first place. Additionally, there is deliberate use of clocks to symbolize various themes across both seasons. A Doylian error like this is not something that would have been overlooked and survived into publication.
So we are left with explanation #2. Time has passed that we, the viewers, don’t observe. What was happening during that time that we missed? More importantly, who knows that this time has passed? Aziraphale doesn’t seem to, and it’s unclear what the Metatron does or doesn’t know.
Some fans have posited that the Metatron is doing the time manipulations, but canonically, the only entity we have observed manipulate time is Crowley. We assume the Metatron is powerful because the angels are all afraid of him, but we’ve never actually seen him do anything, and so have no primary evidence for this. All over, he’s got some big “pay no attention to the man behind the curtain” Wizard of Oz vibes happening; I’m not convinced he could miracle his way out of a wet paper bag, and there’s a chance that in Season 3 we’ll find out that he’s all bluff. Not so with Crowley.
My hypothesis is that Crowley froze Aziraphale and everybody else for a one block radius, including the Metatron, and did something important in the bookshop before it lost its protection. Please see my meta on Sovereignty, Citizenship, and the Bookshop for an evidence-based argument on why the bookshop was the only place in the universe that Crowley could have safely hidden something. Since Aziraphale is no longer the head of an independent embassy, whatever Crowley was keeping safe in there isn’t safe anymore, and needs to be moved. Universe time continued to pass and the clock reflects that, but Aziraphale and the Metatron aren’t aware that they were paused.
Which also gives us a new interpretation for the kiss.
The Kiss, revisited
Crowley didn’t want to send Aziraphale a message.
Crowley needed a plausible cover for the immense effort it was going to take him to freeze time against Aziraphale and the Metatron that he knew was standing outside.
How do I know he knew?
No nightingales.
Juliet. Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:
It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
That pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear;
Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate-tree:
Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.
Romeo. It was the lark, the herald of the morn,
No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks
Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east:
Night's candles are burnt out, and jocund day
Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.
I must be gone and live, or stay and die.
No nightingales could be the end of a romance. I argued as much in my inaugural meta just six weeks ago (and what a six weeks it has been, people!) But “no nightingales” could also be a secret signal to two people who have a unique bond through Shakespeare that Crowley has realized he is not safe, and he needs to leave, and he’s trying to tell Aziraphale that without letting their spectator in on the message.
Now he has to stop time to secure whatever item he’d been keeping safe in the bookshop. But keeping Satan at bay required him to lunge upwards, using his whole body to freeze time. He can’t get away with anything like that here in the bookshop, that would give up the ruse.
But what if he lunged at the person everyone knows he’s in love with and violently kisses them on the mouth, his entire body tense with the effort of freezing time in the presence of two ethereal beings? No one would notice the difference, or think anything nefarious of it; a Class A surreptitious time-stop.
One last crackpot theory.
Aziraphale knows what Crowley did. Well, he knows that he froze time, and for the first time realizes that Crowley has locked him out, and that he used the kiss as a cover. The violation of agency, trust, and their romantic bond are all breaking across him in the instant that time restarts, after Crowley has gone away for 11 minutes and returned to almost, but not quite, the same position inside Aziraphale’s arms. It is an intimate act that Aziraphale is fully tuned into, and for the first time, he’s noticing the continuity errors.
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His horror-filled expression is one of broken trust. But his bond to Crowley is too strong for even this to break it. He knows that whatever reason Crowley had to pull this trick on him, it must have been a good one. It must have been to protect him.
“I forgive you.”
***
One more completely crackpot theory based on the Gavin Finney interview at The Ineffable Con last weekend.
The camera was supposed to circle them. Finney says that this was to show that they are the center of their universe, and their world is spinning.
Okay, okay. But could it not also have represented the spinning of clock hands? I’m just saying.
Closing obligatory "do not put anything about this in Neil Gaiman's askbox"
Find my entire collection of metas here
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Rajani Pandit is first female an Indian private investigator and entrepreneur from Maharashtra, India.
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