#highly complex DID

[lefluoritesys]

"What's your favorite type of music?"

*sweats in DID* "U-uhm... I- I listen to everything, depending on my mood :D"

The moods sitting in the back of my head watching me: "No, no, they've got a point"

[thefruitybasket]

“You can’t be a system!! You and ___ both do this!!!”

We still share a brain.

“You and ____ LOVEEE this!!”

We still share a brain.

“You and ____ talk very similarly!!!”

We still share a brain.

[electricbloodflow]

DID is simultaneously the most subtle, ambiguous disorder while also being the most intense, all-encompassing, extremely-personal-because-it-affects-fundamental-perceptions-like-memory-and-identity-at-all-hours-of-the-day disorder of all time.

[theresidentfullmoon]

POV: You're a system.

[imilliehawks]

Being a caregiver, I realized that one of the best ways to help somebody without freaking them out even more is by rephrasing your questions and offerings in a way that would give them the choice to choose. It should he obvious that when you ask, for example, "Can I give you a hug?" you are offering a choice, but that's not the case for people who are freaking out or blacking out. It's way better to ask, "Would you like me to give you a hug?" or "Do you want a hug?" instead.

Same with:

⛔️ Can I hold your hand? | ✅️ Do you want to hold my hand?/Do you want me to hold your hand?

⛔️ How can I help? | ✅️ What would you like me to do to help?

⛔️ Can I do X? | ✅️ Do you want me to do X?/Would you be okay if I did X?

⛔️ Can I see? | ✅️ Am I allowed to see?

The more you state it in the sentence that it's in the person's abilities to turn you down, the better. First sentence matters. People who are actively freaking out or blacked out would not care for a long and complicated explanation as to why you said what you said. They most likely can barely hear anything at the moment. And can barely understand anything that's happening around them.

[aetherial-boy]

unpopular opinion - the tiktok system community has changed people’s perceptions of DID so much and it’s kind of irritating for those of us who don’t fit the stereotype it’s created.

- a system who dosent exactly fit the tiktok stereotype and is fakeclaimed because of it.

[museofdeity]

being a system is going through years and years of abuse and torment. being a system is sitting in the shower sobbing because you don’t know who or where you are. being a system is losing year-long friends because they refuse to believe you. being a system is looking the worst parts of you in the face and going “i think we can change”. being a system is holding a child version of yourself and repeating “i love you” over and over again.

being a system is hugging yourself and saying, “hey, we’re gonna be okay.”

[borderlinedolly]

Things I Rarely See Talked About

Level 2/Medium Support Need Autistics

Level 3/High Support Need Autistics

Deaf and/or Blind Autistics

BIPOC Autistics

Nonverbal Autistics

Semiverbal Autistics

The Downsides of Getting a Diagnosis

Older People (30+) With Disorders Like DID, ASPD, BPD, Autism, Etc

[rez-urrection]

are you a system ?

are you a survivor of RAMCOA, ITBC, TBMC, OEA, or anything else of the likes (whether it created your system or not) ?

consider joining the conservatory !

the conservatory is a 16+ discord community for systems who have survived complex intentional trauma, which for the sake of my thumbs typing this, ill be using "CIT" for (as far as I know, this isn't an "official" term, but it covers all bases without leaving anyone, out in my books).

other spaces for CIT survivors can be uncomfortable, unsafe, and focus too much on the trauma that created these systems or alters, while regular system spaces can be downright hostile towards survivors of CIT.

this inspired me, a childhood cult and sex trafficking survivor, to create my own space. a space for survivors like myself to be comfortable, safe, and not have to be censored for concern of being "too much."

disclaimer under cut !

this does not apply to "pro-para" stances. this server is strictly anti-para, so it is not a safe space for pro/com/dark shipping. this server is not an NSFW server, nor is it a shipping server. it's simply a social server. not that I should have to explain, but as a victim of the types of abuse fetishized and romanticized in these types of communities, its extremely triggering and I'm not going to set asside my triggers and safety to accommodate people I don't even agree with nor want to associate with in a space I created specifically because I wanted a space that did not include proshippers, because I couldn't find one. if you want to join a server that allows pro-para stances and proshippers, looking up "RAMCOA discord" on Tumblr will show them to you ! I know this, because I've had to leave 3 of them for allowing proshippers because it personally makes me uncomfortable. there are other spaces to accomodate you, please utilize those spaces, and stop forcing your beliefs onto me. no is no, respect that. my triggers will not change, just like how my triggers will not change your coping mechanisms.

respect my decisions, just as I respect yours. I dont want to share my safe space with triggering content, and you dont want to share your safe space with people who dont agree with your coping mechanisms ! so let's all be adults and move on ! why are you harassing me in my comments ?

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

Npd & hc-did culture is having a hierarchy, ranking people who are above you (your group), and people who are equal to you (your fp) then everyone else is under you because they can't fathom what it's like to be you and only your fp understands even a little bit and your group is above you because they control you

-🫀🦷

.

[planesofdelusion]

people on fdc: you gotta trust therapists, they know more than you

DID therapists who know more than them: *engage with their clients as people, assume they're telling the truth when they disclose trauma, try to understand how their experiences shaped their systems, study neurological and psychological responses to get a picture of how certain abuser groups operate, generally practice psychological medicine well the way therapists should*

people on fdc: no, not like that. those therapists are conspiracy theorists and should never have been licensed

[lefluoritesys]

Yet another thing I don't see talked about in the DID community: the host anxiety of letting go of front.

Obviously it doesn't happen to every system, as some systems don't even have a host; but can we talk about the fear and anxiety about potentially never coming back to front if you fully let go, as a host? I dealt with it for a year and a half until I was able to actually start letting go and sitting off front for long periods of time. But there were times when 5 minutes off front fully caused me panic attacks.

This fear especially comes when you are a baby (newly discovered) system. This feeling that you built a life for yourself, and suddenly, you feel like you'll lose it to other people. And it's not that you want it all for yourself, but losing it entirely is what's scary. And there is usually a whole inner world behind you... who knows what happens inside of it, what it can do, who lives there? As well as, it's scary to let go of control of events IRL. Who knows how others would handle it, even if you know them well already?

And that's just our reasons.

Moral of the story: y'all are not alone, and it gets better.

-host

[thefruitybasket]

Calling people a “sysmed” when being a system is a MEDICAL thing is crazy..

This blog is NOT endo safe!

* Post made by Davis !

[pink-devolve]

As someone who is a programmed PF-DID system, we need to stop using the term HC-DID. Here’s why ⬇️

1. The system that coined the term is a groomer and is anti-semitic. There is evidence(some screenshots included below) of the MayMay system(The 20y/o coiner of the term) being sexual towards minors up to 5 years younger than them. In MayMay’s discord server, 15 year olds are allowed in NSFW channels that have sexting in them. MayMay has joked about sexually assaulting a 16 y/o. There is a 15 year old that seems to always be with MayMay, and constantly talks about interacting with MayMay in a NSFW context. Etc etc etc. There have also been screenshots of MayMay using the term “Jew” as a derogatory insult.

2. The term excludes programmed systems that do not have a highly complex case of DID Many programmed systems can not use the term “HC-DID” due to having OSDD, not having PF-DID, etc. All programmed systems have distinct differences from non-programmed systems, but programmed systems without a highly complex case of DID don’t have a straightforward term to describe their experience. I’ve seen a lot of people use the term HC-DID and programmed interchangeably, and imo that’s not fair to other survivors trying to find community.

3. You can have a highly complex case of DID and not be programmed. You can have trauma that is just as extreme as the trauma experienced by programmed systems, end up with a highly complex case of PF-DID, and not be programmed. I’ve met some non-programmed PF-DID systems with insane system structures. One system I knew was not programmed, but had hundreds of different alters, all with very specific roles, hierarchy, and layers, that all fronted to do very specific tasks. They told me they had a specific alter who fronted to wash their hands, and another specific alter who fronted to sleep on wednesdays. Their case could absolutely be considered highly complex, but again, they weren’t programmed.

4. We have terms used/created by professionals, that don’t have any of these issues. The terms mind-controlled DID (MC-DID) and Torture based mind control DID (TBMC-DID) have both been coined by professionals, can be used with other plural disorders(MC-OSDD), or to describe all plural disorders at once(MC-system), can’t be used to describe non-programmed systems, etc.

Overall, I don’t have an issue with individuals that use the term HC-DID, I just think it’s annoying that it’s the default way to say “programmed system”. I honestly think the term is a fine way to describe systems with a highly complex structure, and should still be used in that context. But if we do that, the term should be open to non-programming survivors as well. There is absolutely no reason to fight over this term. It’s really not that deep. But if you’d like to debate respectfully I am happy to.

[electricbloodflow]

dissociative experiences scale 2

The DES is such a fun diagnostic tool. I've had a couple of therapists and psychiatrists administer it to me. It's an empirically tested scale that gets a feel for tbe magnitude of a person's dissociation.

I score differently depending on alter (they reason what each question means and how frequently it occurs differently) but usually score in the 45 to 65 range. When I was younger my scores were generally in the 60 to 80 range. Progress!?

I used to score high on questions like dissociating so hard you literally see yourself in the third person and you are approached by people you don't recognize who know you, but I very rarely experience that anymore. I keep forgetting about the experience of seeing myself in the third person during dissociative episodes - that was such a severe symptom that I used to occasionally experience.

For anyone interested in taking it, you can take it here. Today, I obtained a 66. I have been unusually stressed lately.

The website has some interesting information on here. In studies, certain mental illnesses were associated with certain scores.

>!Dissociative Experiences Scale Scores

Explained High and Low DES Scores

High levels of dissociation are indicated by scores of 30 or more, scores under 30 indicate low levels. Successful treatment of a dissociative disorder should reduce the DES score when compared to the result before treatment began. Very high scores do not necessarily mean a more severe dissociative disorder is present, this is because the scale measures both normal and pathological dissociation.

Dissociative Identity Disorder and the DES

Only 1% of people with Dissociative Identity Disorder have been found to have a DES score below 30. A very high number of people who score above 30 have been shown to have Posttraumatic Stress Disorder or a dissociative disorder other than Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Clinical Uses of the Dissociative Experiences Scale

If a person scores in the high range (above 30) then the DES questions can be used as the basis for a clinical interview, with the clinician asking the client to describe examples of the experiences they have had for any questions about experiences which occur 20% of the time or more. Alternatively, the Dissociative Disorders Interview Schedule (DDIS) or Structured Clinical Interview for Dissociative Disorders (SCID-D) can be used to reach a diagnosis.

Average DES Scores in research:

General Adult Population 5.4

Anxiety Disorders 7.0

Affective Disorders 9.35

Eating Disorders 15.8

Late Adolescence 16.6

Schizophrenia 15.4

Borderline Personality Disorder 19.2

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder 31

Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified 36

Dissociative Identity Disorder (MPD) 48!<

[aetherial-boy]

being chronically dissociated isn’t the most talked about DID symptom but it’s a complete nightmare to live with and i hate it so much.

i’m rarely fully grounded, i always feel like the smallest trigger is gonna send me back to not knowing who i am again. i’m on autopilot a lot, just going through the motions of life, not truly living it. i spend most of my time feeling at least partially out of it and people make a lot of assumptions based on that. it’s also exhausting, and it puts me in… situations. these range from ‘i wasn’t focused on being grounded and didn’t notice the queue moved’ to ‘my younger sibling stopped me walking into traffic because i wasn’t able to ground myself enough to be aware of my surroundings outside’