#proof systems

[pv1isalsoimportant]

Hilber-style proof systems will be the bane of my existence. In this house we stan sequent calculus.

[crypto28ro]

Zero-Knowledge Proofs în Bitcoin: Securitate și Confidențialitate Avansate

Introducere Bitcoin a revoluționat sistemele financiare prin introducerea unui mod descentralizat de a efectua tranzacții, bazat pe o tehnologie blockchain transparentă și securizată. Totuși, această transparență, deși esențială pentru integritatea rețelei, ridică probleme privind confidențialitatea tranzacțiilor și a datelor financiare. În acest context, dovezile cu cunoștințe zero…

[saint-ambrosef]

we need a shorthand term to explain to others that you believe in a healthy skepticism of established medical practice and don't blindly believe whatever Big Pharma™ says to be gospel truth on health, but also dont think the answer is to reject all mainstream medical advice and put trust in christine from facebook who has a 1-week online course "degree" in functional medicine and thinks every health issue is because you dont eat enough beef fat

[emacrow]

Jolly stringbean.

Babs was sitting at her desk in the library, glaring holes into the obviously hiding in disguised Tim.

Her friendly smile could hide the twitching lip as she checked out books for the few people in line. Ignoring the constant buzzing coming from the BatChat.

Bruce and the Robins had let this lie down after 3 weeks, which was a clear point that she knew they feared her, but it seemed Tim didn't get the memo.

Reminder note to replace his yearly concentrated espresso coffee supplies with decaf, and uploads his embarrassing toddler videos in him in a ducky outfit singing the duck song on the media.

Thankfully, Danny kept her wedding ring translucent, considering she was pretty sure Isabelle would try to chew on it again after she left it on her nightstand last time.

A different chime buzz on her phone as she flick her gaze at it, the message comes from Jolly StringBean💚 with a gif pfp of a tall elderitch sleeping, very inhumane impossible position on the kid's wardrobe after Isabella got sick that one time, only for his long ears to ping upwards startle with his glowing green eyes flashing the screen, white hair expanding to reveal camouflage fake hundreds of glowing green eyes like a peacock, tripping and falling off where he was standing as she had accidentally startled him awake in that moment.

She glances back at tim, who at the time was being distracted by a book before looking into the chat real quick.

Jolly StringBean💚: Dante and Isabella figured out the juice was on the top shelf of the fridge and tried to get it out, only to fail again.

Danny sent a few pics of 3 year old Dante and Isabella trying to sneak into the fridge. Isabella determined face while Dante looked around, obviously searching for danny, scratching his split white and black curly hair a bit.

The second one is Isabella standing on Dante crouching as she tries to pull the tropical punch out of the fridge after they open it.

The third Pic was Isabella falling backward due to the weight of the juice container being very heavy, her face completely surprised and gobsmacked.

Fourth pic was Dante sobbing on the floor, his tiny hands rubbing his eyes with tropical punch spilled all over the floor and Isabella sucking onto her hand, both of them soaked in fruit juice with the broken fruit punch container between them on the floor, in front of the fridge.

Along with the last Pic of Isabella taking a bath, Dante's puffy red eyes as he nibble on a blob ghost marshmallow already in a fluffy bunny towel, Isabella smacking the tiny green glowing ship on duplicated danny's obviously screaming as she didn't want to leave the bubble bath.

Babs's eyes soften in amusement before immediately blanking her phone to off upon seeing Tim at the front of her desk.

"Are you checking out these books, Tim?" Babs said with a polite smile planted on her face as she scanned the books.

"Who was that guy's voice on your com? Are you dating again? What if he is a-

"Tim, I have your ducky video on speed dial to be sent to the media. Do you really want to test me in public?" Babs comeback with a bright smiling that sent shiver down Tim's spine.

"...."

"My thoughts exactly, now your book is due next Saturday, don't be late again." Babs said, putting in the due date in the book's folder. Tim's eyes narrowed as she knew this wasn't over by far.

Babs watched and waited until Tim left the building completely before wheeling over to where he was spying on her, checking every shelf and book using her extender stick to find 5 mini batspy bots cameras planted.

This noisy litt-.. Babs took a deep breath as Frostbite told her not to get too angry in her state as she disabled the batspy bots.

She can't wait to get home and be a potato on the couch watching Danny cook. It is spaghetti and fudge brownie night.

Part 1 here <-

[kami-fubuki]

hey so watch out if this person ever joins your proship server they just joined mine and spammed this fuckass message 100+ times in every single channel

[crimsonspring]

"my star, that's not what i had meant." xavier's voice, as always, is as gentle as can be. she's over-consumed with anger, grasping at straws in attempts to validate her desperate want to scream at him, so she tries to think of a time when he'd raised his voice at her, and she can't. not even by a singular decibel.

xavier, a man so fitting of his angel-like features, was the kindest and gentlest soul she's ever known. even during their biggest fights, (she wonders if he'd even consider them fights, because he never fights back) he'd only ever gently explains his thoughts as she snaps and throws her arms up in frustration. this time, it's no different.

"oh come on, xavier. you meant exactly what you said - you don't think i can do it!" she speaks accusingly, deep lines of upset drawn in between her brows as she frowns. "you said "i don't think it's a good idea to involve yourself in this mission," did you not?" xavier opens his mouth to speak, but shuts it soon after. because she was right, she had quoted him verbatim.

she scoffs, shaking her head as she glares at her lover. "and yet, your name was the first one i saw when they released the list of hunter confirmed for the mission! do you see me as less, xavier? i know i'm not as experienced as you are, but i'm still a good hunter!"

xavier has his head hung low, blonde strands covering his guilt ridden blue orbs. he feels guilty, there's no question about it. yet, the small selfish part of him, ruled by the memory of his dying lover's body turning cold in his own arms, makes no way for regret to reside in his body. till this day, though a long time since the memory was birthed, there isn't a day where the feeling of his legs growing numb from staying frozen in place, fearful of any minuscule movement that will reinforce the fact that she has died, doesn't haunt him.

it was not as though he isn't aware of her capabilities as a hunter. she was talented beyond words. the way she moved and danced with the swords and weapons against the wanderers like the battlefield was a stage for her very own recital - her skills captivates him every time he had the honour of sharing the battlefield with her.

but he won't lie, ever since doctor zayne himself had pulled him aside secretly after he had accompanied her to her monthly appointment to advise him to be cautious of her overexerting herself physically at work due to her heart condition (and though neither doctor zayne nor she has given him much clue about the true urgency of her condition, he cannot help but be haunted by the fear and frustration in the cardiac surgeon's eyes), the fear has kept him up on more nights than he thought possible.

he's still silent, unsure how he'd like to go about this. as worried as he is, he bets it's an even more difficult experience for her to go through. her condition was something they barely talked about, she often shrugs off the topic every time it was brought up. xavier understands that she fears it too - almost to the point that she overcompensates for it by being too fearless. xavier wishes they could just simply talk about their fears together, but he doesn't know how to.

"so? nothing else to say now?" she almost challenges him, scoffing yet again in disbelief as she finally pulls her glare away and crosses her arms. xavier actually has a million and one things that he wishes to say, the bulk of it being apologies and the truth that's been weighing so heavily in his heart.

xavier is soft spoken, his body often the pen that writes the words he wishes to speak. "i.." he begins, then shakes his head as he steps in front of her, and so naturally, gets on his knees. an arm wraps around the back of her knees, and his free hand captures one of her own. he finds strength in the warmth of her skin, a reminder and reassurance that she was still alive and well - and he shan't squander this chance.

"i apologise, my heart." he sighs, grateful when she doesn't pull away. there is still stiffness and hesitance in her body and he doesn't blame her for that, understands that she's upset. nervously, he looks up at her, a little desolate when he sees her purposefully looking away. he takes her hand to his lips, where they press a soft kisses on each of her fingers. he doesn't know the intent is to comfort her, or himself. though he enjoys the imprints of her skin against his own, would tattoo the art lines of her fingerprints onto every inch of his body if he could.

"without a doubt in my heart, i know you're the bravest woman alive. enthrals me to no end how you're so beautiful, so talented and so intelligent all at the same time. all the marvels in the world stored in you." his eyes never once strayed away from her face, and you could see the twinkling in his eyes as he continues to watch her like she was the embodiment of the flowers that bloom in spring - and this garden was a place he'd be the most devoted pilgrim for. and with the honour of being the one she loves, how could this soldier not want protect his beloved treasure?

"but in all honesty, i'd been a bit worried since your last appointment. you've never truly told me what happened, so i don't know how to gauge things." he continues his explanation, still on his knees as he continues to press his kisses against her skin. this part of the explanation though, sends a shiver down his own spine as he recollects the reality of the situation. his star might not be okay, and he doesn't know what to do to cure her, except to just protect her. pulling his eyes away from her, he whimpers and presses his forehead against her abdomen. "i'm just scared."

the prince of philos is on his knees. a man with enough power to rule a planet, but in his eyes, that will all go to shame - rendered useless - if he can't find a way to save her.

"i understand that you don't feel comfortable with telling me what's going on.. but i know that it's not good. i don't know how to make you feel better, so i figured at least, i could do my best to keep you from harms away." he feels her fingers comb through his blonde locks, and he impossibly nuzzles closer to her, his arms tightening around her torso. "if you tell me what i can do, my love, i'll do it."

"i swear to you. tell me what i can do. tell me what you need, and i'll travel a million times around the world for it."

[anachronismstellar]

I got something stuck in my head and idk man have this scene I guess

What if SQH were the one finding Liu Qingge in the caves?

Feat Sleep Token - The Summoning

As always no beta we die like Liu Qingge man hidhidf

----

He had no idea when everything had gone wrong, all he could feel was the burning of his meridians and the taste of copper on his lips. Like a fog, screams reached his ears, and in a blink of sanity he understood that it was him, his throat completely ruined as blood dripped down his chin and neck.

It had been days, it had been weeks, it had been-

He didn't know.

He felt his arm swing against monsters that weren't there, whispers crawling up his spine, their biting voices making it impossible for him to identify friend or foe. His vision swam again, darkness dancing at the corner of his eyes as if he were stuck in an endless shadow puppet theater, grasping smokes as he fought to get back to reality, to the caves.

Then the light came.

He wasn't conscious enough to recognize that he had been hallucinating for quite sometime now, but if the past month had taught anything is that he had no allies, he could trust no one. So when glittering white and yellow dashed past him, he did the only thing he could have possible do, rushing with his sword at ready, the light prickling his eyes after spending so long in the dark.

At the back of his mind he heard something that sounded like his name. Didn't feel right, however, as if it were coming from underwater, the burning in his chest unbearable as he did his best to slice his opponent, his strikes being met one by one. Another voice, one that sounded too much like what he would say if he were sane, kept screaming at him, reckless, useless, pitiful, disgraceful-

A hand slapped him with full force against his chest, the searing heat of his core freezing too fast for him to understand what had happened. He gasped, chocking blood as he tried to breathe, his wet heaving sending a wave of despair to his bones.

Another slap and this time his lungs filled with more air than blood, snapping him from his overwhelming fear, tears trickling down his cheeks as he finally saw the person in front of him for the first time.

Liu Qingge wasn't a pious man.

He believed in the Heavens as one believes that the moon and starts could influence destiny and fate, to say not at all.

Still, the first thing his mind could think of was that a High Spirit or a Godly creature was in front of him, their hair disheveled a halo, hands gentle as the morning dew helping him to lay down as his legs failed to hold him up.

But the most striking thing were his eyes, glowing gold like embers in the dark, guiding him as he slowly came back to his surroundings.

Liu Qingge squinted his eyes at the man, his foggy brain struggling to process who was in front of him. It was as if trying to put two images over each other and having them mismatch- the man in front of him shouldn't, couldn't be there, and most of it all the man in front of him wouldn't be capable to go toe to toe with him, qi deviation or not.

"-with me?" Shang Qinghua's voice sounded like rocks gritting against each other, as if the man had been screaming for a long time.

Liu Qingge blinked a couple of times, head tilting to the side as he tried to nod. Shang Qinghua hand went to the back of his neck, holding it in place as he pressed something against Liu Qingge's lips, the liquid so cold it felt as if he were drinking snow. He thought it was water, but the more it washed away the taste of blood, the more he could feel the sweetness of it, the coldness soothing his throat.

"There you go, Shidi, just a bit more," Shang Qinghua tilted the leather canteen slowly, giving time for him to swallow before pouring a bit more on his mouth until he turned his face away.

Heaviness took over his limbs, a different type of fogginess started to cling to his senses, sleep making everything soft around the edges, including his sore bones and muscles. He tried to speak, to ask what was happening, but Shang Qinghua just scratched his scalp with a soft "Shh", not helping him at all to stay awake.

"Let go, Liu Qingge," and he wanted to stand up, to pay attention because Shang Qinghua had never called him by name like this before, so it must be important, right? He needed to be alert, he- "Shh, I won't let your story to be untold this time."

And that made no sense, no sense at all. What did he mean by this time? Was this man even the real Shang Qinghua? Was he surrendering himself to an impostor? But why save him, why?

"Why..." he mumbled right before sleep dragged him to a kinder darkness, the molten gold eyes guiding him to a dreamless sleep.

---------

Don't ask, I have no idea either, but I have been listening to Sleep Token non stop since Wednesday and I was feeling a darker vibe than the 12/12 fics.

Look at me, building the Warplane ship one insane fic at a time husdihfuisdf

Anyway, hope you enjoyed the fic! See you around!

[slurmdog]

is it hard to wait? / drawn by your mongrel heart again

Mongrel Heart, Broken Bells

[ID: Scum Villain fanart. Luo Binghe has an intense expression and stares at the viewer. A wolf holds a large human heart in its jaws, positioned so the heart is right under Binghe's face. It's dripping blood. The image is cast in blue shadow, but Binghe's eyes, the heart, and other highlights are red. /end ID]

[starry-bi-sky]

yall ever think Shen Yuan went through like, internet withdrawal after being transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu? Like, he's canonically a NEET shut-in who did nothing but spend his time online, you can't tell me that for the first week or first few weeks of being SQQ he wasn't twitchy.

Like, reaching instinctively to his pockets for a phone that wasn't there, having an obsessive itch in the back of his mind that he should check and see if X or Y novel or webcomic has updated -- only to realize he can't anymore and being irritated by it. Wanting to go and see if there's new posts about this or that, but again realizing that he can't.

When he's bored or uncomfortable or just feels like wanting to escape he tries to go for his phone to distract himself, but oops! Not there anymore, and now he has to find a new and different way to distract himself from his feelings. And going through system notifications, quests, etc only does so much.

And there's that Tetris Effect too. SQQ makes a mistake while writing and instinctively goes to backspace on it except hey-ho that's not a keyboard and now he just dipped his pinkie into a bottle of ink or on a still-drying letter.

With him scrambling to fix his reputation and learn how to be a peak lord, I think his abrupt cold-turkey from all things internet would just be another straw on the camel's back that he promptly Ignores until it goes away on its own after he acclimates to his new surroundings.

[aevris]

revamped a character from 2016 :]

[superbat-lmao]

Bruce Wayne dies, and like a prayer, Jason Todd returns to Gotham. Always too late.

He never followed his plans or became Red Hood, instead finishing his schooling and traveling for a while with Talia to stay in shape. He and Damian on and off text or call, but they both know the other is living the way they need to. They’ll always be there, but sometimes you need your own space to figure out what you really want.

When Dick takes up the mantle and Damian becomes Robin, Jason takes a posting at Gotham University and rents an apartment in the alley. Damian comes to visit and Jason tells him stories, as many as he can remember. The kid wanted to know his Dad, after all.

They don’t tell the others. Instead, grieving the loss of their Father together. When Jason came back to Gotham he expected anger. Now he just feels lost.

It’s completely on accident that Dick learns his identity. He gets a call one night from Damian, not panicked but alert. He’s calling for backup because Batman was shot.

Jason has the two of them in the back of a stolen car and makes it all the way past the security of the Batcave before he really comes to his senses. It’s a bit of a clusterfuck after that, between Alfred and Leslie trying to prioritize Dick while interrogating the imposter until they’re satisfied he’s just Jason. Their Jason.

And maybe it gets a little better. Jason has to go out as Batman until Dick’s back on his feet, so he and Damian patrol together and come home to Alfred and Dick. He goes to see Babs at the Clocktower and she introduces him to his sister, Cass, one of the few people Damian speaks highly of.

It’s different, and weird, and he and Dick have a couple of fights. But it could be worse. Slowly but surely, they figure things out. Try to move on.

And then Tim comes home and like a prayer, Bruce Wayne is alive again. Always too late.

[mystic-wolfs]

Little reminder that you don't owe anyone any explanations about your system, how it functions, how big it is, why you have certain introject, why certain headmates have specific roles, explanations of said roles, sources of introjects, exomemories and in general anything!

You also don't owe anybody an apology for said things and to why you might not know any of it or know a whole lot.

We exist because we do and it should be in our hands what and when to say something not because we owe it or it's expected of us!

~? (Need a name, need a name ^^'')

[theredcuyo]

The demonic Bros au is mostly just fun stuff i come up with on the whim, but there is a lot of angsty material if i ever wanted to aim for an actual fanfic or something

Few examples here:

Luo Binghe, trapped in the abbys, heartbroken and worriedly wondering what is going to happen to his little brothers now, because if Shizun hates him, and they're found to be related to a heavenly demon then-

Wei Wuxian, carefully doing A-Yuan's hair, wondering if Hong-er finally got around doing his, looking at this little kid and seeing them here, hearing the words "gege" and for a moment expect to turn around and see someone else

Hua Cheng, having to fruitlessly search for 3 people at the same time and getting absolutely nothing out of it, to the point were he's not sure his brothers were real to begin with, he's sure his god is, but his brothers? Who he can't find literally any trace of?

A dying Wei Wuxian, who hallucinates the people who he loved, and painfully wonders if he could find all of them in the other side

Luo Binghe, who was told by Sqh that his sibblings had dissapeared years ago and no one was able to track them down, drowning in even more grief

Hua Cheng, who paints a portrait of his little, and maybe imaginary, family

Both Binghe and Hua Cheng built extra rooms near their owns, built to detail for people they think could never get to see it

Wei Wuxian who sees his Shijie and Jiang Cheng, and can't help but wish they got to meet his other family, his ge and Shijie would probably cook something together! Hong-er would get on Jiang Cheng's nerves on purpose, and then they'd laugh about it, but... Well, dwealing on what he's lost never helps-

[jinlin-at-the-moon]

Hi I'd LOVE to hear ur thoughts on transwoman shen qingqui

oh my god its actually happened. someone gave me an excuse to talk about this. holy shit lets go

the Thing with shen qingqiu is, as many of us know, that if anyone out there holds the crown of sheer denial, it is in fact the superior qing jing peak lord. shen qingqiu has a couple incredibly specific quirks to her internal monologue, and for the purposes of this mini essay (which will likely not go as in-depth as i'd like as i haven't had time to re-read the books recently and also don't have them physically with me right now so an actual essay-may-come this is not), i specifically note a few patterns with her thinking.

THE DENIAL, AS AFOREMENTIONED - we all know about this one. sqq, is, dear god, really good at being absolutely balls deep in denial about both her own feelings and also the feelings of others (especially when it comes to luo binghe, who i will also get into at some point in this).

RELATED, THE MENTAL GYMNASTICS - at surface level, it seems like the denial and the mental gymnastics are one and the same - however, i generally pose that they're not, exactly, but the mental gymnastics are still derivative of the denial; and by that i'm specifically counting 'mental gymnastics' to mean all those instances of thinking one thing that is actually true with her actually really good deduction skills not enough people give her credit for, then IMMEDIATELY following it up with a "haha but surely that cannot be true because i read pidw and i know better than my initial assumptions" (which is, in fact, precisely why people don't give her enough credit for those initial deduction skills. i love this woman's bullshit so much)

THE PROJECTION (wife edition) - in svsss, there are multiple, multiple instances of this one; it's specifically all those moments where sqq thinks about Luo Binghe's Many Wives™ when if you read past the 5 layers of self-bullshitting you immediately realise that she's just straight up talking about herself. she's awful, really.

THE PROJECTION (binghe edition). see i told you i'd get to him. this one is harder to explain without concrete examples actually, which is why i'd love for this to be a comprehensive essay after re-reading the books, but alas it is not. basically, shen qingqiu does this Thing (primarily after the kiss in book 2 happens and onwards, but it does show up earlier in smaller doses iirc) where she projects all of her wants onto binghe - particularly when it comes to sexual/romantic endeavours, but this happens just… in general? again really hard to tell you what exactly i mean without examples, so i gotta source: trust me bro on this even though i don't like doing that, but. trust me bro.

so, that's the foundation, right? where all of these patterns are used in the book is quite obvious - and that is, well… all over the place, really, but what immediately does come to mind is The Queerness - and specifically, its repression by shen qingqiu herself. in the story, The Queerness of it all is primarily taken to mean specifically homosexuality, and the values superimposed on sqq's psyche clashing with her own repressed sexuality and current situation, and also that she very undeniably loves binghe both like a child and a lover. (this is NOT about to turn into one of my freudian musings, but that's mostly because someone has already done that way better than me. shoutout to tshirt's svsss freud essay it's deeply important to all of my svsss beliefs btw it does also touch on the trans woman sqq thing which is fun. anyways.) …actually, no, the milf thing is relevant. we'll get to the milf thing. but back to talking about gay shit, shen qingqiu makes…. a lot. of references. to being a woman. and all of her thought patterns become Relevant while doing it- y'know, those same patterns she already uses for homosexuality, quite famously a queer thing to be, so it's like. The Queerness:

while the denial doesn't quite come into play directly, for obvious this-is-not-canon-and-i'm-just-insane-but-will-nonetheless-make-my-point reasons, it's present all throughout this reading - she's already really, really good at being in denial. it's not just a river in egypt to her, wait does egypt exist in svsss's specific setting actually? like this is a different can of worms but while mdzs does directly take place in china and tgcf is slightly less so but also implied to be in a very fantasy time period but still china i legit can't remember if any of those kinds of geographical references exist in svsss or if pidw was just straight up in the same sphere as The General Fantasy Setting is to western medieval fantasy? i'm getting way off topic here, it's a lifestyle. the mental gymnastics are relevant in that sqq is generally very prone to adjusting reality to her own mindset wherein she's self-assured that the reality she imagines is the true one, as well as her own dissociation from her own wants and needs covered up by But I Cannot Be Thinking That (most relevant example i can think of being her real grief over binghe she refused to acknowledge for fear of acknowledging her own feelings as a whole, while SPECIFICALLY also referring to herself as 'alike to a grieving widow', which is just further fuel for me) and her later projections of her own issues on binghe. that being said, i do think being post-canon will do her a lot of good. babygirl please get your brain out of survival mode and do some introspection. anyway, the projection (both kinds) is where Shen Qingqiu Is A Trans Woman is the most prevalent in its theory, because the projection allows for…. a lot of woman comparison that sqq may make. ESPECIALLY the wife thing. i've never counted how many times sqq either directly or indirectly compares herself to one of Luo Binghe's Many Wives™, and right now the only time that happens that comes to mind is during the dream demon arc - which, by the way, is absolutely full of sqq comparing herself to a woman, and it's also (iirc) the first 'maiden luo' comparison appearance, so it's just, like. the first scene i ask anyone who asks me about this headcanon to read while keeping "but what if she's trans" in mind, really.

speaking of the 'maiden luo' comparisons, that's the only concrete number in this essay i can give you, because i counted it a while ago. shen qingqiu refers to luo binghe as a 'maiden' 11-12 times across the four books. and while you'd THINK most of those would happen pre-abyss, a vast majority actually appear after the kiss in book 2, which is the moment where sqq imo honestly starts (admittedly still through 50 layers of self-bullshitting still) begrudgingly making the shift from the m to the f in milf. this is hilarious for a number of reasons, even transgenderism theory aside, but this post is not about putting transgenderism theory aside, so let's just. look at that. and think about it. really think about it. because maybe, deep down, what shen qingqiu might just really want, is a dedicated lesbian relationship with luo binghe. god bless. jokes (?) aside, the fact that sqq starts doing all the comparison of either herself or binghe to women way more often specifically after she is made to realise the true extent of binghe's feelings for her feels really important here. it's almost like, the second she begins letting up on her queer repression even a little bit, some other feelings escape. curious, isn't it. it's great.

now, am i going to address the perhaps-elephant in the room? as in, you know. the 'as long as she's a real woman' line? actually i am, but specifically because that line made me laugh and then immediately start considering this theory in the first place. i'm not kidding, that's where it started, and then i slowly went insane over time. it really does fit sqq's particular brand of repression, though. like damn girl, they gave you internalised homophobia AND internalised transphobia? how much shit do you have internalised? many shits, probably. god knows what else is there.

oh, and speaking of iconic lines. well. this whole essay, had i the ability to add in direct quotes, absolutely would include Every Single Time Shen Qingqiu Compares Herself To Su Xiyan, You Know, Famously Luo Binghe's Mother. THIS is where i talk about the milf thing, actually, because it's still absolutely INSANE to me that that shit is just, In The Text. like. wow. i both question my own sanity and keep being like it's mind boggling how much the text itself wants to prove me right. anyways, sqq and sxy have extremely deliberate set up parallels between them - in particular with the tlj/lbh parallel added in as well, but also with bingqiu themselves, which. hilarious. and freudian, again. go read the freud essay. sqq is compared to sxy a LOT, she both does it herself and other people do it - which does lead to the infamous 'i wouldn't have aborted you' line, which is just…. the quintessence. of why i love this book so fucking much. and also the milf thing is evidence for my crazed mumblings so whatever. i think you get my point here

(…and since we're talking about other people comparing sqq to a woman, because it's somewhat relevant. this happens. quite significantly. with one other character in particular. like most sqq woman references are mostly either from her own weird twisted mind with the "The Wives™" thing or with the su xiyan thing or the forlorn widow after binghe's nightmare road trip started thing. but there's. one person. who. weirdly consistently does this? and i truly don't know what to think about it but. hey airplane why do you forcefem cucumber-bro in your head so much. there is generally a lot of things wrong with airplane, but the '[peerless cucumber] is alike to a wife married to a disappointing husband' in regards to pidw readership line literally lives in my head rent free all the time forever and everything that's around it is just…. it's bad even with context. what. this isn't an airplane essay but with the knowledge that luo binghe was to some degree airplane's self-insert does make me feel some kind of way in addition. airplane. please. like airplane was trans(masc) in his past life in my head which is also an interpretation essay i wish to write one day but that doesn't make anything better. this whole paragraph is just an unrelated tangent. i'm sorry airplane-bro is my second favourite character and his sqq woman references are Numerous i can't do anything about it)

--anyways, so. this last point i'm going to make is one that is honestly less about the trans thing in general, and moreso a general take i have, so. here goes,

putting the trans in transmigration: i think there is a lot of merit to observing transmigration/isekai-type stories as a sort of allegory for queerness in general. while svsss is, on its level, already an exploration of this, i do wish to on my own terms also give a thought or two i've had about my reading. shen qingqiu is, in my honest opinion, sort of misrepresented in the fandom quite often. it's not even a case of blatant mischaracterisation (even if that also happens sometimes), but rather a case of 'what's in a name'; or rather, what's in an identity. i opened this post by calling shen qingqiu, as we know her, the main character of svsss, "the superior qing jing peak lord" -and while some would see it as a comedic jab to lighten the mood, it's really not such in the long run of this specific meta. becoming the peak lord of qing jing, becoming shen qingqiu, is the best thing that could have happened to peerless cucumber, internet critic, 'pretty-boy wasting his life away', IRL ID 'shen yuan'. see those air quotes thats right bitch this is going to be my hottest take in this essay: shen yuan is her deadname. i am both dead serious AND alive silly.

i actually wrote a post about this on my old account here, and to be quite honest i still stand by that my thoughts there - if you look closely, shen qingqiu never refers to herself as 'shen yuan' post-transmigration. she's fully locked in. she has accepted that courtesy name with grace and immediate acceptance, and in general doesn't… think much? about her old life and name? in fact the only other reference i can think of to the name 'shen yuan' is with the mushroom arc, where the mushroom body's appearance is based on her old body in part - and it's also particularly interesting to note that she doesn't feel one way or another about either of her appearances, which is food for thought no matter which way you take that! point is - shen qingqiu is shen qingqiu. she fucking LOVES being shen qingqiu. she goes from 'wasting away' in her old life to being a good teacher and finding joy in her work, having actual friends besides one weird guy online she had a parasocial hatred for, having a partner who cares for her, and a life she actually likes, and while i do think that angst may come from coming off survival mode and properly processing all those deaths she had, that angst is not going to be about 'impersonation' of any kind - because, well, shen qingqiu is shen qingqiu, and she's happy to be shen qingqiu and stay Shen Qingqiu Specifically forever. am i annoying with the emphasis on purpose, maybe? this goes beyond transgender interpretation thoughts this is just my hot take post right now - people love to give sqq name drama or transmigrator angst that just, in my take, doesn't actually work for her - she is no longer shen yuan, and she is not shen jiu (who, nota bene, she doesn't refer to as "the real sqq" ever), and while she feels momentary regret for getting all in sj's business, it's ultimately but a part of her experience in the world she lives in now; the world she's building a life in, the world which in spite of all of its contrivances she likes living in far more than her old one, the world she's been able to craft her own identity in. and that's really the core of it all, honestly- the point of this meta, i mean, though we got quite far away from it for a second there for the sake of my own grievance, so. sorry. this is a transgenderism essay, i promise. because shifting into a new name and identity without hesitation and finding yourself in a whole new reality you come to love far more than the depressing life you've left behind is, in my opinion, an EXTREMELY trans narrative, and in the end, that's the true point i wish to make-

(-well, that, and ALSO that people should stop a-yuaning her ass because thats her deadname that she hasn't thought about in years, but that's another one of my personal old man yells at mountain type fanon grievance-)

-so, in conclusion. my fun guy trait is dragging people in with memes then making it profound - and that's, hugely, why i adore svsss so much; because it really does the same thing. thank you for enabling my bullshit. if anyone wishes to argue with me about any of this you are Welcome To btw i love debating on the internet. cya around when i actually write a proper essay with quotations on this <3

("by the way, koi," you may ask, "by making shen qingqiu a trans woman, aren't you making bingqiu straight, and doesn't that impact/undermine the whole sexuality realisation sqq already canonically has?" to that i answer, no. sqq is right with all those maiden luo instances. because to me, too, luo binghe is a he/him lesbian*. thank you for coming to my ted talk)

[talk-danmei-to-me]

Interior illustrations ranked according to tumblr:

1) Svsss

2) Mdzs

3) 2ha

4) Qjj/Tgcf

5) Yuwu/Thousand Autumns

6) Guardian/BaB

[anachronismstellar]

SQH x Original Goods SQQ ;>

ooooooh wait, WAIT I have to think this one

Let's all pretend is not 4 am shhhh

I feel like OG SQQ would be attracted by SQH competence, like a game of cat and mouse or or OH WAIT I KNOW

------

The black and white pieces were carefully organized over the wooden board, the game paused as both peak lords took their time to consider the possible strategies. Shen Qingqiu had been the last one to make a move, capturing one of Shang Qinghua's stones, turning it between his fingers as he took the opportunity to observe the An Ding Peak Lord.

He didn't know how they ended up in this situation. If someone asked Shen Qingqiu when he had started observing Shang Qinghua, he had no exact answer. He knew it hadn’t been during their Head Disciple days, then Shang Qinghua had blended so completely against the wall of yellow robes that Shen Qingqiu could barely remember him during his missions. His best bet would be one of the first meetings as peak lords, Yue Qingyuan still trying to organize twelve egotistical cultivators as each of them tried to grab more missions and more resources for their own peak.

Hah, he would have more luck shoving twelve cats in a bag.

But then, the An Ding Peak Lord stood up, slamming a pile of papers so high it had been a miracle it didn’t fall all over their table.

"May I speak, Zhangmen-Shixiong?" Shang Qinghua had asked after a short but respectful bow, flipping his sleeves in a circular motion to wrap them around his arms in a graceful movement. The he proceeded to metaphorically and literally grab all of them by the scruff of their necks, organizing their speaking order, cutting their speeches short with a no nonsense "Thank you" every time they spoke beyond their scheduled time.

"We can stop here for today," Yue Qingyuan said with his brows slightly up, not able to hide his surprise when they finished things before dinner time. "Thank you, Shang-Shidi, for your help."

"Of course, Zhangmen-Shixiong," Shang Qinghua answered, but Shen Qingqiu could see his mind was already somewhere else, rushing to get to the door before anyone else.

Since then he couldn't help but keep an eye on yellow robes passing by, eager to hold the other for a conversation, to pick on his brain.

He blinked, coming back to his bamboo house by the soft sound of rustling silk and jade against wood as Shang Qinghua made his move, holding back a frown.

"Either play properly or leave," Shen Qingqiu said as he took another white stone from the board, putting it a bit too forcefully on his little pile on the table.

"Ah sorry, sorry, Shen-Shixiong, I'm having issues with a special ink shipment, and then Mu-shidi asked for a flower that I know he knows it only grows during winter and it's summer-"

"Stop blabling," he sighed as he looked up, glaring at his ceiling to pray to Heavens for patience. Last time he had lost his temper with Shang-shidi the man had vanished for weeks, leaving Shen Qingqiu without a decent Go player and a bad taste on his mouth. "I have no patience for your mental games today."

And as if by magic the man in front of him transformed, the suck up smile sliding from his face as Shang Qinghua straightened up his posture, the small man growing twice his size as broad shoulders filled his robes properly. "This one apologizes for testing Shen-Shixiong's patience," Then Shang Qinghua slowly twisted his head to the side, cracking his neck followed by a sigh. "I had to spend the morning dealing with Zhangmen-Shixiong, and you know how it is."

Shen Qingqiu let a bitter chuckle escape, sliding his fan open to hide half of his face, knowing full well how good his eyes looked over the painted paper.

"What? Sucking his dick isn't solving the problem?"

The effect was immediate. Shang Qinghua that had decided to take a sip of his tea almost chocked on it, gasping for air for a good minute, face so red one could think he had never written porn in his life.

Oh yes, Shen Qingqiu knew about his little stories too. Shang Qinghua wasn't the only one with spies all over the mountains.

"I- We- It's not-"

"Oh, spare me," Shen Qingqiu scoffed, lazily fanning himself, as he gave one last glance at the board, mourning their forgotten game. Shame, it was so difficult for them to meet up for a match. Of course Yue Qingyuan had to spoil even this for him. "You might be able to lie to those buffoons Wei Qingwei and Liu Qingge, but I have two perfectly functioning eyes. Also, there are so many late night meetings one must attend before it gets excessive."

It was good to see that red suited Shang Qinghua just as much as yellow. And Shen Qingqiu had to use all his will to not laugh as the other peak lord did his best to recompose himself, all in vain.

"My real question is... And I know I will regret the answer," Shen Qinggiu raised his hand to stop the new barrel of excuses so he could finish speaking. "How ih the all realms did that start. Did he offered you a holiday of some kind? Or maybe he wanted to thank you for dealing with Liu Qingge last stunt, Heavens knows you deserve a raise for that."

Again, Shen Qingqiu wasn't expecting a real answer. In fact, he wasn't expecting an answer at all, the way Shang Qinghua was blushing, the An Ding peak lord was about to faint or run away before Shen Qinggiu could snap his fan closed.

What he did get, however, was a muffled string of words, followed by a groan and a whine. Peharps he had hit the mark with one of his hypothesis? Now, things have gotten even more interesting.

"Speak plainly, Shidi, you know I can't stand mumbling."

"He complimented my hands!" Shang Qinghua squaked, his voice so high it had scared the poor birds on the garden.

There was a beat of silence as Shen Qingqiu waited for the rest of the explanation, barking a laugh when nothing came.

"That's it? Is it that easy to make you open your legs?"

"Oh shut up, Shixiong, you say that as if you wouldn't do it too!"

That, was crossing a line.

Shen Qingqiu never had to explain himself or his hatred for Yue Qingyuan to the other peak lord, it was if Shang Qinghua knew somehow that they shared a past. That was another thing that drove them together, the fact that Shang Qinghua was able to keep his mouth shut, even when he could use it for his own gain.

"Shixiong, I'm so sorry I-"

"Do tell," he interrupted what was for sure about to be an emotional moment for both of them, lips pressed thin in a frown, making sure to send his best murder glare to the man in front of him. "What compliment did our steemed Zhangmen-Shixiong could have used to conquer the slippery An Ding Peak Lord?"

He could see Shang Qinghua's brain working a way to escape the situation, his eyes darting left and right, checking all the exists of the small house. He could also see the moment Shang Qinghua had resigned himself to his fate, shrugging and waving his hands, buying himself time before answering:

"He said I had nimble fingers? And then I panicked and asked if he wanted to see how nimble they were or something, I don't remember and then, well, we, uh-"

"Well?"

"W-Well what?"

"How nimble they are?"

It finally clicked, Shang Qinghua's face going from embarassed to surprised, then interessed as he made a point of putting both hands on the table, slowly tapping his fingers on the top of it, the little tease.

"Would Shen-Shinxiong like to find out for himself?"

Shen Qingqiu felt his mouth drying as a shiver went up his spine. He wanted to scream at himself, to throw Shang Qinghua out of his house and hit him with the Go board on his way out, just out of spite.

On the other hand, he couldn't deny that Shang Qinghua was a handsome man when he put on some effort. Specially when he was commanding a room of peak lords, giving orders left and right, so sure of his information and knowledge that they had no other choice but follow.

How would that be...

"Follow me, Shidi," he got up in a measured movement, holding back his excitement as he guided them towards his room. Time to see if not only what those fingers could do, but also to put that smart mouth for better use than fumbling excuses.

And just as he had done many times before, Shang Qinghua surprised him once again, making Shen Qingqiu scare the birds with an entirely other type of screams.

------

This got,,,, Insanely long holy shit.

Also, it's kinda a continuation of the SQH/YQY ask?? dshiufhdsuifhui

I hope you liked!!! Thank you for the ask it was a blast to write it!!! :DDDD