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sheikah-simp · 1 year

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Exile//Vilify, One Year Retrospective

Well folks, as of May 31st, 2023, it has officially been one whole year since the last update for Exile//Vilify was released, and it simultaneously feels like way longer than that and not very long at all. But, in celebration, I wanted to take some time to look back on my thoughts and ideas and processes that led up to the creation of this story, and share some appreciation for all that’s happened since then.

First of all, this book is massive, and it was way more massive than I thought it would be when I set off to write it. It is almost as long as Tolkein’s “Two Towers” and other similar novels—not what I was expecting when I went in to write an origin story about a character completely lacking in personality with no backstory. But if there is one thing I do, and do well, it is commit to the bit. And here, the bit was doing justice to a character I saw having so much potential but was, quite literally, doomed by the narrative, and built to be a throwaway character for a spinoff game consumed by his own hubris and never developed or mentioned again. And I thought to myself, “Man, that sucks! What would it be like to be him?” And the answer is: it would suck a lot, actually. But also in that vein, I still wanted to portray how his life was still a life worth living, and his story, one that was worth telling. Even if it is one that doesn’t “matter” to Nintendo or the LOZ franchise as a whole, even if it’s one I had to entirely make up grasping for straws, it is one that mattered to us. And that’s kind of the thesis of the entire book.

Many of you know I’m a Pokemon writer (hence username) and I never really intended to write in other fandoms, but I dont know what I expected. Something about this character just fucking gripped me, and I couldnt let myself stop until his story was out of me. But the thing is, I wasn’t super interactive within the Pokemon fandom. I had actually just ended a huge general life hiatus for mental health and had made a resolution to get back to what I love. The result of that was the completion of The Devil and the Dead Sea and the start of my hardenshipping series. But I just kind of dropped that book on AO3 when it was complete and then didnt interact with anyone. I wrote it and then uploaded it all at once, which didnt give me a lot of time or opportunity to develop a community and discuss updates. I had a few people who reached out, but nothing close to the type of community I’ve felt now.

I have been so full of love and blown away by the support I’ve received from this small but mighty niche in the community. So first of all, I just want to say thank you. I'm so glad that I could bring this story to life and so blessed to think of how many people it's touched. So now I just want to take a moment and look back on the book and how it started, what things changed, and where it's going and what's happening in the future.

Exile//Vilify's conception

youtube

Does it feel like a trial? Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?

The band, The National, has inspired I think all of my fics to this point. After playing Age of Calamity, Astor had been swimming around so much in my head, especially since so much of his mysteries were unanswered. And one day blorbo was on my brain in just the correct way at just the correct time when I happened to be listening to a completely unrelated song from Portal 2, Exile Vilify. The book, of course, has nothing to do with Portal, but on that particular day, the lyrics really spoke to me of Astor and his potential struggles, and I became fascinated with the idea of him and his ideological square-off against the king: a man who was so set on defying prophecy and the man who, well, prophesied it.

So Exile//Vilify was born, to me, actually in the concept of a butting of heads between King Rhoam and Astor. I saw the song lyrics as a dialogue between the two of them, mutual antagonistic (but also troubled) feelings shared between them. So King Rhoam was actually going to have a much bigger role in my original vision for Exile//Vilify. In fact there was a toss up in my mind between whether or not he'd have an odd homoerotic rivalry thing for the king, or his crush on the queen, but--

But the simple fact of the matter is I found Rhoam super unlikeable and sadly couldn't find a good way to get into his head in a way that would be sustainable for a novel. So while the concept is what initially gripped me, Exile//Vilify ended up going in a different direction, although the inception of that concept is definitely still there. The closest I've gotten to writing my desired dynamic between Astor and the King was in "Prophecies to Waterfowl," a one-shot in my short stories compilation Stories from Exile. ("Prophecies to Waterfowl," aside from "Voe and You," is my favorite of my stories in that compilation).

Other things that were cut/changed in the writing process

When I realized the fic was getting as massive as it was, I wanted to streamline its focus and decided to cut down on some plotlines. I could have just left it was it was, because fic writing is about being self-indulgent, but I want to challenge myself to be a better writer than that. (Not that there is anything wrong with just writing to be self-indulgent, but I use my fics as my place to practice and get better, so I need to.. actually practice).

One of the biggest things that was therefore cut was the relationship between Astor and Ganondorf, and the implications of Astor's past lives. How Astor became the one selected by Ganondorf. Because in the fic, it just ended up seeming random, which was intentional. Fate is merciless and random and does not pick and choose, while also picking and choosing.

There were going to be more Astor and Ganon dream scenes planned, and a plotline of Astor's "awakening" somewhere along the line where he unlocked visions of his past as a different kind of royal seer--the seer to Ganondorf. There are hints of this in the dreams, but nothing concrete.

Still, the idea of what "could be" still fascinates me, and I love the idea of exploring the idea of Astor as Ganondorf's reincarnated seer, and I have a one shot that I am currently working on that explores this very concept, and can be considered canon (or semi-canon) to Exile//Vilify. I hope to have that out... soon. Ish. Eventually. I have a lot cooking right now.

Other honorable mentions:

Astor was going to have more blatant romantic feelings for Rose.

Astor was going to have more blatant romantic (or complicated) feelings for Rhoam.

The contention between Ganondorf trying to push Astor into evil and Thelem agreeing to block Ganon from Astor in the meantime was also going to be explored more, but Ganondorf got his last laugh on that eventually.

Even more fucking Order of the Seers stuff (culture, rituals, etc)

Chapters of Astor stalking Link and Zelda leading up to the awakening of the Calamity

More Yiga scenes (my little teen Kohga gives me oxygen) and Astor building a cult following of people who worship Ganon

Astor having basically a weird prophetical drug addiction to the "high" of witnessing the Great Calamity in his visions (this is kind of implied in the book, but not expanded on)

All of these things, ultimately, were great ideas, and things I'd love to explore and maybe will some day if I'm ever inspired enough on any of them to write anything concrete. They were just things that slightly detracted from the story I wanted to tell. But that's why I keep Stories from Exile around.

So What's Next?

As I mentioned, I have a few things Exile//Vilify related still in the works. The first is that Astor/Ganondorf one shot I was talking about. (Likely going to be called "Prophet to a Gerudo King.") I also have a secret surprise fic commission that is also Astor/Ganondorf related and involves an AU and the Stories from Exile universe ;) (that one will hopefully be out soon).

I have a lot of things on my Stories from Exile list that were not out yet, and I may revisit them if I'm feeling or have the time. I'd love to keep updating that one every now and again, now that Exile//Vilify is complete, just to keep the world alive.

I also am planning on doing a limited, hard-cover release of Exile//Vilify to celebrate its publication. I have a great team of people who have been slowly helping me copyedit this massive beast so I can get it printed from a self-publishing company. It will not be publicly listed for sale, as it is illegal for me to sell or make money off of it. This hardcover will only be available to obtain for those who contact me on tumblr during a specific time frame. That time frame is not now. When I have a more clear set date for that, I will circulate posts. You will have to cover the cost of shipping and maybe some of the printing depending on what the cost is on my end, but the book will be free. It will likely be 500+ pages. It will likely happen by the end of the year.

That said, as the book nears being printed, if you would like to lend a hand proofreading, there is still time!! Please just DM me. You will have the option to be credited in the hardcover if you'd like.

And finally, you'll still be able to find me here, and updating in my other writing. I still really love receiving asks about this book, so please never be a stranger to my inbox. Sometimes I have more energy and power to reply than others, but every ask always makes my day.

I have planned "Trouble Will Find Me," which is a Thelem and Azelphir prequel that will detail some of the stuff that I didn't have time to develop about the Order of the Seers, and Thelem's origin story. This one I might just release all in one chunk - uncertain right now. At that point though... isn't that kind of just original fiction.... set in the BOTW world???? Unsure.

I'll also be returning to my Pokemon series, The Dead Sea Trilogy, if you have any interest in that fandom or my other writing.

That's all I have for you! Thank you all so much for an amazing year (really more than that, since I've been posting about this big honkin' thing since December 2020...) and thank you so much for being such a great community. I can't wait to see where else this journey leads.

#exile vilify #astor age of calamity #age of calamity #stories from exile #my writing #Youtube

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jacksgreysays · 2 years

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the bleak primadonna au brainrot is real

I have loved your posts on characters' thoughts so far, but I haven't really seen Kakashi mentioned? How does he feel about the whole ordeal? How is he reacting to the fallout? What would he do if there was a civil war over it?

AHHHHHH, anon, thank you for validating bleak primadonna AU brainrot is real. I’m patient zero and it is wild how much I keep thinking about it, lol.

To be fair I hadn’t really considered Kakashi much in this AU until you asked. Except for the canonical “had he still been Hokage this wouldn’t have happened” type thing. But as a person also affected by the Incident and, again, living with the knowledge that he could have prevented this, there’s all that good classic Kakashi Guilt™

BECAUSE I do still stand by the idea that he would have given Shikako her justified revenge. BUT ALSO, another part of the reason for the brewing civil war is that some people think Shikako is the better Hokage candidate so there must be a part of Kakashi that is wondering what if he had chosen Shikako as his successor.

And, like, we have to imagine that when it came time for Kakashi to pass down the hat he did know that objectively Shikako is the better leader, administrator, mentor/guide, general, etc. etc. Of course as of canon DoS, Naruto is still out on his time skip training trip, but Shikako has gone full jounin with SQ’s world building of peace time jounin requirements and even before then we see the difference between Shikako taking the lead on missions versus Naruto being mission leader.

Although, again, haven’t consumed Boruto, so I don’t know if they ever explained what happens between teen Naruto to Hokage Naruto. He could still be genin ranked for all I know, although I would think that whatever powers that be that decide the next Hokage would want him to prove himself as a jounin. And while, arguably, wartime promotions are a thing (obviously child Kakashi didn’t have a civic leadership project considering his almost literal lone wolf vibe and also being a child) the whole point of a Hokage Naruto is that he wants/brought about a world of peace. Which is to say that we don’t necessarily know what Naruto will end up doing for his jounin civic leadership project or even if one is required of him, but I can’t imagine it’s more impressive/significant than the, essentially, multiple jounin civic leadership projects that Shikako has done/contributed to, etc.

All of that to say, if Kakashi were to be logical about his successor he would definitely consider/ask Shikako first—privately so as not to rub it in Naruto and Sasuke’s faces--then ask for her opinion on who it should be after she says no. Because obviously he knows about being a reluctant Hokage forced into a position he doesn’t want (he probably tried to pass down the hat even earlier, but it’s not until a certain age when his students are a more acceptable option that it becomes reasonable) and he would never want to do the same thing to his students. And of course at this point in time—post war/all threats dealt with—Shikako just wants to relax and come up with cool seals and not worry about any oncoming tragedy so she certainly doesn’t want to be Hokage. And moreover of course she wouldn’t want to steal Naruto’s dream. So she turns Kakashi down.

(And this is maybe something she thinks about, too. After everything. The hubris she had that even if she didn’t become Hokage that she could still guide/influence her friends into doing what she wanted/thought was correct. And how galling it must have been when Naruto refused her. O_O)

But back to Kakashi.

He wonders, maybe, if he should have… not MADE her take the hat per se, but been a little more convincing. Encouraged her toward it in a way that said, “Hey, I was the best option Konoha had at the time and I stepped up. I think you’re the best option Konoha has now and I want you to step up, too.” Because it’s not always about who WANTS it the most but who is BEST for the role.

(And also, for all that Naruto is arguably not great in the bleak primadonna AU, I don’t think he’d be resentful towards Shikako had she become Hokage. He would have been a little heart broken for a little bit, maybe, and always think about it wistfully, but I think he would have eventually come to terms with it and, like, re-contextualize his desire to be Hokage for what it really was (to be publicly respected and liked which he achieved before becoming Hokage anyway))

But, let’s move beyond Kakashi’s Guilt and Regrets™

If Sasuke is conflicted to the point of being neutral and staying in the village, I would want to do something different with Kakashi. In classic Kakashi fashion, he does turn the blame inwards, but he also has to never show it because now—with the exception of Gai—the only people he can be vulnerable about these types of things are his students who are at the heart of the issue (and also Sasuke who is already SO conflicted)

It’s a very fine line he is walking and I’m not sure if I’m even articulating it right, but basically I think he is a big Kako Heijo fan but also never acknowledges who Kako Heijo really is. Like, whenever possible, he goes to the midnight premieres of her movies but never reaches out to use his obvious connections to get merch or autographs or special seating or anything like that. Why would he? He’s just a fan of Kako Heijo. He has no other connection to her. Of course he never taught her, you must be confused, Kako Heijo is a civilian actress not a shinobi. Why are you being so weird. Oh, you must be thinking of my student Shikako Nara. I suppose they have similar names, but I don’t see how you’d get them confused.

Extreme denial is the way he’d go.

I also think, in order to prevent… hm… there’s probably another faction in the village who want Kakashi to be Hokage again instead. Like, a neutral faction or a faction who is also trying to prevent a civil war by seeking a third option or, like, the older generation who see both Shikako and Naruto as overdramatic upstarts because Kakashi shouldn’t have even given up the hat anyway. You keep it until you die (or are unable to fight. Actually, DOES something happen to Kakashi that would make him unable to fight? I did not read much of Shippuden.) But even if Kakashi thought it would work (it wouldn’t) I don’t think he’d want to be Hokage again. And if anything that would just be kicking the problem further down the line because he’d have to retire again eventually and his successors would still be Naruto and Shikako… and maybe Sasuke, although I feel like he’d want it even less?

Anyways… in order to prevent that, I think Kakashi really is leaning into the whole… I’m just a silly old man. Yes I used to be Hokage and one of the deadliest S-rank shinobi on the planet, but now I like to watch movies and play with my dogs, nothing to see here.

And so as not to seem one-sided in his personal but not professional support, I do think Kakashi gets closer to the Uzumaki family as, like, a strange uncle figure (which adds to Boruto’s weird double prince privilege vibe) so its not just them and the Hyuuga clan. But understandably it gets fraught when Naruto neglects his fatherly duties to be Hokage—which both Boruto and Himawari are sad about and only adds to the guilt that Kakashi points inward—and Kakashi doesn’t help him with that because 1) that’s not his job anymore, 2) he’s just a silly old man, and 3) if Kakashi helps Naruto professionally then what was the point of even passing the hat down, if he’s going to advise Naruto then he should have just kept it and maybe the Incident wouldn’t have happened and he wou—

Things get cyclical with Kakashi and his Guilt/Regret Spiraling™

When I say civil war, I don’t actually think there will be outright war and fighting. Most of the movement would be led by the ANY clans and most of that would be a peaceful secession from Konoha, possibly citing the original clan laws of why they joined Konoha in the first place, and sort of implying that there were contracts in place about clan responsibilities to the village and vice versa when Konoha was founded.

Now whether or not the other side accepts the secession peacefully is up in the air, but the ANY clans have been PLANNING and PREPARING for this for a long time so i would think that if it did come to actual battle, the ANY clans would have the foresight to have already evacuated all their noncombatants which puts more risk for the other side. And, sure, Naruto would kick Chouji’s ass—especially since, without Shikamaru, he and Ino aren’t as effective in battle as they were before and no way is Ino going to be able to mind jump a jinchuuriki—but by that point it gets kinda dicey since like… Naruto’s whole stance is that he brought peace to the Elemental Nations and also that Shikako straight up murdered who she wanted… so obviously it’s not hypocrisy per se, but it doesn’t look great in either direction for Naruto if he lets a third of his village leave or if he forces(?) a third of his village to stay under threat of imprisonment(?)

Kakashi knows this. And this is the one case where he is being proactive, competent Hound/former Hokage in that he is trying to reintegrate the ANY clans into the village without tipping anyone off about the plan to secede and also that he knows about the plan to secede. Or maybe he doesn’t really KNOW it per se, but I think he gets the vibe that something is happening to the ANY clans similar to what happened to the Uchiha clan and he’s trying to fix the problem the same way he would have fixed that without realizing that the ANY clans are isolating/diminishing their presence themselves rather than it being done to them by other people.

(Because if it comes to actual war, Kakashi knows what he’ll do. It’s what he’s always done. He’ll fight for Konoha. He’ll kill for Konoha. He doesn’t want to, but he will if it comes to that. But it won’t. Because the Hokage is Naruto and that’s what got them into this situation in the first place)

That being said, it really does depend on the Hyuuga Branch House on whether or not things turn to violence. Because if the ANY clans are able to recruit the Branch House they get that moral victory AND the majority of Konoha’s current most powerful bloodline which means that even if the other clans are willing to stay with Naruto’s village, much less fight for it, odds are not in their favor. But, if the ANY clans CAN’T recruit the Branch House, it then depends on whether they are willing to fight against their current best chance at removing the seal (because even if Shikako is currently off being Kako Heijo that doesn’t mean she won’t at some point go back to sealing. And she won’t look favorably on them if they mess with her clans) and even if they do fight, I can’t imagine they’re going to go all out. (And, also, I have to wonder if Akimichi physiology is at all a deterrent to the Hyuuga’s style? Like… does their bulk mean that more effort is required to hit the tenketsu?)

And, like, even if the ANY clans lose, at worst Naruto is going to imprison them (specifically Chouji and Ino and maybe Kinokawa as the leaders) because the whole situation even started because he doesn’t believe in capital punishment. And then, what, their clans are just supposed to fall back in line without being resentful? And then as if Kako Heijo won’t come out of retirement to prison break her childhood friends and her little brother. AND THEN! THAT JUST FURTHER PROVES THE FUTILITY OF NARUTO’S STANCE (but also does maybe now turn Shikako into an official S-rank nuke nin like the many Konoha S-rank nuke nin before her, but who’s going to go up against her, really, lol)

Oh Kakashi, so little of this is your fault, and yet I know he’s going to internalize all of it and just destroy himself emotionally while still being cool and casual externally.

Sorry for ranting, thank you for indulging me.

#jacksgreyson #anonymous #review response #asks #answers #primadonna girl (says no thank you)#kakashi hatake #shikako nara #naruto uzumaki #brainstorm

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mysticstarlightduck · 8 months

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Red Maple, gingko, and basswood from your tree ask game!

Thank you so much for the Ask, @lassiesandiego!

(The Ask Game)

Red Maple - Which character is the most showy?

Definitely either Ambrose Prosper or Augustus Grimmure, in very different ways.

Ambrose is all about his image as the legendary mysterious thief and literally "putting on a grand show", he's loud, playfully cocky, and adores grand entrances - he would be the kind of person to love having his own epic soundtrack and making a grand entrance à la "The Greatest Showman". He likes being praised, but deep down, this is just a show to hide his more real self, who is more insecure, shy, and afraid (as in, he creates a false "superiority complex" to compensate for his self-doubt).

Meanwhile, Augustus is the other side of the coin when it comes to being "showy" - which I'm not sure is the right adjective for him but it fits, because he's proud and assured of his power to the point rarely considers his enemies a threat (his hubris is his character flaw too, as it leads him to underestimate dangerous people). He's showy in the sense that he more often than not is the most dangerous/powerful person in the room, and takes full advantage of this knowledge by using it to fuel his reputation and create the persona his enemies know him to be. He's the silent, more effortless kind of showy/cocky.

Gingko - What part of your story is the oldest, has stuck around from that original idea?

Harriet's background and overall story for sure. Some of her character has remained unchanged, surprisingly, even as the world and plot around her story changed drastically from that first idea.

What remains the same - (Backstory) She is an orphan girl whose parents mysteriously disappeared, and who comes from a rich noble family. She was then raised by a previously unknown brother-figure of hers who is at first distant towards her and has more secrets than he lets on. Her House (family name) is considered disgraced or shameful for reasons she doesn't quite understand. She has a miserly estranged great aunt. (Main Plot) She discovers a conspiracy happening in her city involving powerful enemies of her family. Her brother-figure suffers a failed assassination attempt.

What changed - Harriet's name used to be Henrietta in earlier drafts, but it didn't seem perfect to me, so I changed it to her current one - her last name also changed. In earlier drafts, her guardian was her older brother, but as the story progressed, I figured it would make more sense (for plot reasons, plus it would make their dynamic make more sense) if she'd been an only child and after the deaths of her parents had been sent to live with an estranged cousin - (and while the two were distant at first they developed a sibling connection because they were the only true family each other's got). She originally fell in love with a rival from an enemy House, but her character had much more chemistry with Augustus Grimmure - who was a new character at the time - so I scrapped that rival idea and wrote an allies-to-friends-to-lovers romance between her and Augustus. Originally, she also had a twin.

Basswood - What's something calming in your story?

Ooh, I love this question (mainly because it gives me the opportunity to be as creative as I'd like)! Some calming things in this WIP include (imagine these atmospheric scenes, which will have happened in the story at one point):

Evangeline's "hiding space", a hidden room accessible through a secret door from the attic. There are lavender flowers by the window, which permeate the small room with their fragrance, mixing with the notable scent of new ink, and stacks of interchangeable books she brings up here from the mansion's library. On the corner, there's a pile of comfy pillows and cushions, where she usually sits down to draw something new on her sketchbook at the end of the day.

It's a snowy night as the train leaves Ansburke's main station, there's the soft chugging sound of the wheels on the track crunching up snow. Seated beside the window, Augustus absentmindedly hums a tune, reading a book. At one point during the trip, Harriet falls asleep and leans onto his shoulder - something Augustus finds endearing and can't bring himself to move away. He just smiles softly, covers her with a coat, and continues humming his song.

"Madam Olympia's Pastries and Baked Wonders" - this store, owned by - as the name clearly suggests - Madam Olympia, a kindly, clumsily loud, and motherly faerie, is a lovely spot in Ansburke's underbelly, introduced to us by Ambrose shortly after befriending Evangeline. This pastry shop is filled with the warm light of floating candles and the wondrous smells of various freshly baked goods - the scents of vanilla, jam boiling on the stove, and chocolate being the most prominent. While walking through the vast shop, Clarence - our beloved awkward vampire boi - buys a cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows, and after careful examination of this "human invention", decides to take a sip.

#wip: enchanted illusions #writer ask game #my wips #writers on tumblr #character writing #my characters #my writing #asked and answered #writerblr #writers #writeblr #writing

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whimsicaldragonette · 8 months

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ARC Review: The Summer Queen by Rochelle Hassan

Order:

Add to Goodreads:

Publication Date: January 23, 2024

Synopsis:

This captivating sequel to The Buried and the Bound draws readers into the twisted and irresistible world of the Fair Folk—perfect for fans of The Cruel Prince and The Hazel Wood . As a new coven, Aziza, Leo, and Tristan faced evil and triumphed. All that’s left is to put their lives back together, a process complicated by the fallout from painful secrets, the emotional and physical scars they now carry, and the mysteries that still haunt them. But with the approach of the solstice comes the arrival of strange new visitors to Blackthorn: the Summer Court, a nomadic community of Fair Folk from deep in Elphame. They’ve journeyed to the border between the human world and fairyland, far from their usual caravan route, to take back something that belongs to them—something Leo’s not willing to lose. Refusing to give up without a fight, he makes a risky deal with the Summer Court’s princess and regent. The challenge she proposes sends Coven Blackthorn into the farthest, wildest reaches of Elphame. But when you play games with the Fair Folk, even winning has a cost.

My Rating: ★★★★★

*My Review and Favorite Quotes Below the cut.

My Review:

If I were sorting this (and the previous book) based on vibes - which, honestly, is a large part how I sort books - then I would put it with the Cruel Prince trilogy. It's dark and creepy, but just exactly the right amount. It's also heartwarming and adventurous and full of brute force human magic borne of desperation and tricky, insidious, charming, treacherous fae magic.

It's a story of love lost and love found and hubris and naievety and political treachery. It's a story of bargains and tricks and alliances. I flew through it in a little over a day and absolutely hated every time I was forced to put it down. If I hadn't had to stop to make dinner for my kid, I would have finished it that first day, my own dinner be damned.

I was instantly transported back to the world and characters of the previous book as soon as I started, as if I'd never left. There was no struggling to get into it or remember what had happened - it was all fresh and immediate and vital. Now that I've finished, I want nothing more than to jump into the final book. Unfortunately, It's not out yet. Barring that, I want to jump back into this one and get caught up in the frenzied rush of it again. And I desperately, desperately want Leo and Tristan and Aziza to succeed and find happiness.

I want more of the characters and their bonds, more of the world and its traps, more of the tentative allies that were never clearly on one side or the other, more of the shifting sands of never clearly knowing what the sides even were because they kept changing.

An instant favorite and one I will definitely go back to. I instantly purchased the audio so I could experience it again in a new format.

*Thanks to NetGalley, Macmillan Children's Publishing Group, and Roaring Book Press for providing an early copy for review.

Favorite Quotes:

Of all the things that kept him up at night, Leo had always been his favorite

“You do get attached to your librarians.”

Tristan had his doubts that a crowdsourced spell would be sufficient defense against Beor, but he didn’t have any better ideas.

“Forget the pep talk. We need a game plan. Someone tried to kill you.” “And Beor. I don’t think it was personal,” he said brightly, as if being collateral damage to someone else’s assassination was somehow better than being personally murdered.

#rochelle hassan #the summer queen #queer books #ya fantasy #the buried and the bound #netgalley #arc review #shilo reads #lgbt+#the fae #elphame #best books of 2024 #book review

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musikat18 · 2 years

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DCEU 10 Year Anniversary: "I Have No Idea Where I Am Going To Be Tomorrow, But I Accept The Fact That Tomorrow Will Come" (Edit-- Tomorrow Is Not Coming I Guess)

The quote in the subtitle for this retrospective comes from Titans/Young Justice: Graduation Day. Donna is talking to a concerned Cassie Sandsmark-- old guard assuring the new guard, promising that though the future is inherently uncertain, the important thing is they rise to meet the challenge.

Donna, in Graduation Day, is killed by a Superman robot, and Cassie is ultimately disillusioned and leaves behind her group of inseparable Young Justice teammates.

For a while, it kind of seemed like the DCEU was going the same way.

For some context: I was 13 when Man of Steel, the first movie in the DCEU, released in theaters (and I DID see it in theaters when it came out, maybe a week or two after opening weekend because I was 13 and still in a town where the nearest new releases theater was about half an hour to forty-five minutes from home). As of now (a little over a week after I started writing this post), I'm officially 23 years old-- by the time I'm halfway to 24, the DCEU will officially be 10 years old.

I don't particularly know why this hit me now. Maybe it's because I'm another year older and haven't particularly liked myself for the last few years and wanted to focus my attention on something I did love, or maybe it's because the more I think about it, the less ten-years-old the DCEU feels, OR maybe it's because the DCEU just had a formal set of captains announced in James Gunn & Peter Safran which naturally kind of lends to looking back at what came before to try and figure out, well, where we're going to be tomorrow.

And because that fascinated me, and because we just had the 12th DCEU movie come out (yes I do count Josstice League and ZSJL as two different movies), I felt the need to kind of look back on everything and unpack my feelings on each project.

So that's what I'm going to do.

I did a similar kind of post a couple of weeks ago for Phase 4 of the MCU, but I'm not actually going to rate these movies because I feel like the DCEU movies themselves in comparison to Marvel, my feelings about them are a lot more...complex and not very easy to assign a ranked number to. And I kind of just want the freedom to talk about the movies and how they made me feel and how I feel about them today.

Pop your popcorn and feel free to leave your own thoughts in reblogs and replies.

EDITOR'S NOTE!

Hi, I thought I could just put this post aside for a week and nothing could happen. Anyway, my hubris has become my downfall again and now I guess I have no reason to put this off given that the DCEU as a concept is effectively dead.

I put an addendum in the title to kind of underscore the news out this week confirmed by James Gunn that both the Henry Cavill Clark Kent that kind of encapsulates this era and the larger DCEU in its current form are all but dead, but I think it's kind of...it doesn't REALLY capture the full effect of how I feel about the potential future of DC films, but I'll save that for the end. You're here for tea. It's below the keep reading. I promise.

Man of Steel (06/14/2013)-- dir. Zack Snyder

Now that Henry Cavill is back as Superman (Future Kat: and now that he's been once again cut out of future plans for the time being lolol oops), I feel like it's overdue for me to retrospect his whole run in the DCEU so far, and I feel like over time, I've become...a lot kinder about Henry Cavill's Superman? And I feel like a lot of that is because of my own learning about how the filmmaking process works and what's in the actor's control vs. the directors and writers and producers, as well as kind of just watching other parts of his filmography, especially The Witcher.

I don't mean that in a way of like "wow his Geralt shows how great he'd be as a true modern day Superman" because Geralt and Clark Kent are EONS apart as far as character types and mannerisms. I mean I think it kind of opened me up to what Henry Cavill can do as an actor and even though the Witcher scripts aren't STELLAR, he's an excellent performer.

I kind of remember my very first impression of this movie being a mixture of awe and confusion-- I think the movie was a couple of weeks old, but I'm a DC stan first and a human being second and I was really excited to have a Superman for MY generation. And then I just???? Didn't really like him????? I think Zack Snyder is really good at painting striking imagery and moments, but the script just didn't really hit, now that I'm old enough to look back on it and rewatch it and articulate what I don't like about it. I know the idea is that Snyder's Clark feels kind of detached and is struggling with wanting to be connected to humanity but being inherently stronger and more powerful than them, but that's the SAME thing they tried with New 52 Superman, and it didn't work then, and it doesn't work now. It's not even a concept that doesn't work for Superman in general. DC Comics is very much the company of Gods Trying To Be Human. I just don't think MoS got it across in an effective way that makes US feel invested in Clark.

Also this is an ice cold take but Amy Adams was robbed. I don't know who she was playing in this movie but it was not fucking Lois Lane. Amy Adams was ROBBED.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (03/25/2016)-- dir. Zack Snyder

They Sure Made This Movie Huh.

This is one I actually waited until it came out on DVD to watch, and I do have to say not only is it a slog to sit through-- no matter how many times I try to rewatch it, I can only make it through while streaming it with friends-- but the HARDEST part of this movie comes down to the fact that I just do not buy that Batman and Superman should be fighting.

A good Batman & Superman conflict stems from the difference in ideology of the characters: Batman, while he can be hopeful, ultimately upholds the flawed justice system while claiming to work outside of it, while Superman is generally associated with rehabilitation, compassion, hope, and honesty.

In this movie, though, Clark doesn't get to DO much of anything to differentiate him from Batman because Lex is pulling so many of the strings, and Bruce is just so.......................................The Dark Knight Returns of it all was a mistake and I don't think it did anything to make the conflict between the two engaging. It's not like Superman doesn't want to kill people and Batman (again because of the Dark Knight Returns of it all) is getting Rougher, it's one of those conflicts that could be resolved by like. Having ONE conversation.

I also feel like this movie, as I've said ad infinitum, was just trying to be TOO many things. It was Man of Steel 2. It was Batman 1. It was Wonder Woman 0.5. It was Death of Superman. It was Dark Knight Returns. And because of it, it didn't succeed at ANY of it. There's a lot of WB Fingerprints on the blueprint of this movie, and a lot of Snyder Fingerprints, and also a lot of Man of Steel just...not being a franchise vehicle. It doesn't come off that way when you watch it. It doesn't have the environmental richness needed and works a lot better as a character study rather than a franchise springboard.

I do have to say one GOOD thing about this movie, though, and that is the fact that it contains the FUNNIEST accidental canon contradiction in the world by having Patrick Wilson do a voice cameo as The President Of The United States. Yes I DO have my own personal headcanon for how this works with his OTHER DCEU character. No I will NOT elaborate unless asked.

Suicide Squad (08/05/2016)-- dir. David Ayer

Margot Robbie and Viola Davis deserve awards for carrying this entire movie on their backs-- anyway, now that that's out of the way...

This is another one I waited for DVD for, but that was mainly because I was coming off the heels of a long NYC vacation and school was about to start up again (I think this was the start of my junior year? *does some math* Yeah, I was a junior in high school at this time) and I was a busy busy teen but we don't have time to get into my perfectionism issues and completely-ignored anxiety issues at the time.

This movie is not really...a movie, I think, but more a series of short music videos/needle-drop sequences put together in a way that kind of creates a story? It has a LOT of needle-drop sequences in it. Like, a LOT. So many that when I think of this movie, I don't really think of individual scenes or lines or even characters, even if this movie gave us Viola Davis' STELLAR Amanda Waller. I think of all the musical moments. House of the Rising Sun. You Don't Own Me. Fortunate Son. I don't really think it's very effective to rely on the music to explain (sometimes poorly) to the audience the tone of the scene or inform about the character. That's kind of what you have actors there for.

And I guess we should probably discuss the elephant in the room that is Jared Leto's Joker, even though I really don't want to, but I'll at least give it a mention. I'll keep it brief, though, because a lot of what I have to say has been said to death before-- I don't MIND them trying a different angle with the Joker, I just don't think it landed. And I'll openly say I'm not married to Heath Ledger's preceding Dark Knight Joker (yes his work as an actor was stellar. No I don't think it offers anything particularly innovative and it doesn't always feel like a Joker to me), that was never my problem with Jared Leto. It was a valiant effort, but Leto's Joker really does feel designed to cater to the Edgy Teen crowd and that's not really Joker to me, either.

Again, I think studio fingerprints are all over this film, but I don't think I would have been in love with Ayer's version either, and I don't need to see an "Ayer Cut."

Wonder Woman (06/02/2017)-- dir. Patty Jenkins

I remember seeing this one. I REMEMBER it. And I remember CRYING in the theater. Mainly because 17-year-old me NEEDED this movie. Like, needed it, desperately, but because it just has a lot of heart behind it, and I don't think that's an accident.

You can tell that Patty Jenkins and Gal Gadot and the cast and crew have a lot of love for Wonder Woman, both as a character and as a concept. Wonder Woman is historically an arbiter of truth and justice and compassion and all that good stuff, and it really shines through in the movie. So much so that even a lot of its weaknesses I'm willing to forgive.

I do wish Diana had more women to interact with in the film. I get what they were going for here, but it felt so odd to have a film so definitively trying NOT to be "women good men bad" (even if it does kind of feel like it sometimes, I'll get into it in another post maybe if people have interest) where it was so focused on isolating Diana from other women and how much Diana didn't fit into Man's World.

But like, even with the things I didn't like and don't like when I look back on it, this film had a HUGE impact on me. I still have a quote from Diana's climactic "deserve vs. believe" speech at the end in my blog bio. The idea that people should do good and work to make things better no matter how hurtful the rest of the world seems is a HUGE part of my ethos personally, and this movie is almost exclusively what affirmed that for me and set it in stone.

Josstice League (11/17/2017) --dir. J*ss Wh*don

(Yes I know this gif is from the Snyder Cut but if there was ever a movie that exuded I'll Make Tea energy for me it's this one)

I...............................................................................................................

*sighs*

I know the exact moment I knew I was going to hate this movie.

Picture this. You are me. You are at the movies. You are watching Josstice League for the first time. You are having a good time in the first half, because you are really liking the supporting case of the JLA and you loved Wonder Woman and are so happy to see Gal Gadot back and Jason Momoa is so fun as Aquaman and you really like Ray Fisher a lot and are so intrigued by his Cyborg and Ezra Miller's Flash is pretty fun too and yeah Ben Affleck is there and you don't care about Batman but you are having a GREAT TIME WITH YOUR NEW JLA!

And then they lose ONE fight and Batman says "fuck it. We gotta resurrect Superman. We can't do this without Superman. Let's bring him back from the dead."

And you slowly, horrifically realize that this is not, in the end, going to be a Justice League movie. This is going to be a movie where all the fun new friends you just met, most for the first time, try their best but ultimately just sit back and let Superman do all the hard stuff.

I have a lot of problems with Josstice League, and now you're all going to hear about it.

I'm not here to talk about the boob fall scene, or the quippiness of the humor, or the fact that no one here seems to really like each other, or that this is almost basically just Avengers but with the serial numbers filed away and given new ones over it. I'm here to talk about the fact that, at the end of the day, the movie is not about the Justice League.

There is no teamwork in this film. There is no bonding in this film. There are no friendly co-workers in this film. This is not an ensemble movie or even a team movie. This is a Batman movie with some side characters who SHOULD be more important than they are written that is later turned into a Batman/Superman movie with some side characters who should be more important than they are written.

I don't know why WB Studios thought the best move would be to bring Joss Whedon in to essentially remake Avengers and hope it would work, because at the end of the day, the Avengers and the Justice League have two very different dynamics going for them.

The Avengers are a found family, but a very dysfunctional one. They argue a lot. They split into factions a lot. They constantly switch out members because people are always dealing with too many personal complexities to maintain the teamwork. But they are, for all their faults, a family.

The Justice League are a found family, but in a very different way. Yes, they have disagreements. Yes, there are ideological conflicts among members. But at the core, the team is a group of individuals who come from all walks of life and yet all share the same loneliness. Whether it be Clark's alien status on a human planet, or Diana's deliberate separation from all she's ever known, or Bruce's self-imposed isolation out of grief for his parents, everyone on the Justice League has felt loneliness, and they stick together because they realize they are no longer alone and they do not have to be.

You can have them argue and have pet peeves with each other, but they can't not like each other at all on some level. And I did not see anyone on that team who liked each other, not even Diana and Bruce, my poor little WonderBat heart from the JLU cartoon days weeps.

Also, Ray Fisher was robbed. We all knew that, but it bears repeating. He was robbed.

Aquaman (12/21/2018)-- dir. James Wan

I've already talked this one to death so I won't keep you here too long lmaooooooooooooo

No but like for real, I love Aquaman. I love this movie. It's comfort food for me. I have a lot of love and respect for James Wan as a filmmaker, and I do think the smartest thing WB ever did was start hiring horror directors to do their superhero films because horror has SO much creativity in it, historically.

I know when the cast was announced, I was definitely confused because it just seemed like a very eclectic group of actors (Khal Drogo, Ed Warren, Boba Fett, Satine from Moulin Rouge, Ivan Drago, and Norman Osborn?????), but the end result was just so, so good. It explores deep themes if you're willing to read them, but it's also just a lot of explosive (literally) dumb fun.

Also, my blorbo. My special boy. My little war criminal. Mwah.

Shazam (04/05/2019)-- dir. David F. Sandberg

*presses mouth directly to microphone*

Shazam Fucking Slaps.

I think this is probably one of the strongest DCEU films and that's probably because it just lets itself be as bananas and fun as it wants. It really plays with the concept of "Big but it's Superheroes" to the fullest and has the feel of an 80s movie like The Goonies or The Sandlot, which isn't a bad thing at all. It's hard not to love seeing Billy and Freddy run around and geek out over how cool it is to have superpowers, especially because I remember being a kid like Freddy once and it absolutely warmed my heart to see Billy develop his relationships with all of his new siblings and his new family.

I also really love that this movie wasn't afraid to get kind of Dark at times despite having the Shazamily all over it. Again, WB having horror directors like Sandberg do their superhero films was a GREAT choice because of the inventiveness they have and the way it allows for Billy to really have a chance to grow both as Billy Batson and as the Champion and face really ultimately uncomfortable and scary things.

Also I related to Mary a little too hard here. I was like "wow she's just like me" and then I was like "hmmmm i think i have Unresolved Personal Issues."

Birds of Prey (02/07/2020) --dir. Cathy Yan

I-- okay. Okay. Okay. First let me share a fun fact: this movie, I actually saw at an exclusive early screening event WB hosted for my university about two days before the movie released, and also this was the last movie I saw before the Global Panini happened.

Okay, so I think this is a GREAT Harley Quinn movie, especially for the Harley of the current era. I like that it's fun and vibrant and colorful and just lets itself be about women who want to beat people up and do so in the most over-the-top explosive sometimes gross way possible, and I also like that it doesn't shy away from Harley being a bad person in certain moments. Like, sure, she's very much the protagonist of this movie, but she's still kind of an ass to everyone around her, even to the people she likes like Cassandra. Also, again, Margot Robbie is just fun to watch in this role. She's probably one of my favorite actors of the 21st century so far (with I, Tonya being one of my favorite movies ever), and it's clear that she loves being Harley Quinn and has a ton of fun with the role.

As a Birds of Prey movie.....................................................that kind of just isn't what it is at all. I get Margot Robbie's logic from what I understand from the behind-the-scenes development of the movie-- the Birds of Prey from the comics are a group of badass women and they go kind of unsung for the wider audience and she wanted to highlight them, and that's cool and I agree with her-- I just don't think this movie accomplished that with Harley at the center of it.

I think there IS a version of this movie that accomplishes both things, and also lets Cassandra Cain ACTUALLY be Cassandra Cain and not just Pre-Transition Jason Todd, but I don't think that's the movie we got. The movie we got is a lot of fun! I loved it! I think it's fun to watch, it's fun to talk about, I always have a good time with it. But I don't know if I'd call it a Birds of Prey movie.

Wonder Woman 1984 (12/25/2020)-- dir. Patty Jenkins

*blows out a long breath of air*

I have a lot of..................complicated feelings about this movie.

I don't really have a problem with the cheesiness of it all-- like I said above, I think that's been a strong point for a DCEU that has been way more willing to lean into the cheesiness of comics in general compared to the MCU (especially EARLY MCU). It really does seek to emulate an 80s action movie with magic and action and big set pieces, and that's fine.

I also definitely GET what they were going for here. I can see all the moving pieces and the themes and everything, and I don't even necessarily think it's a bad thing or a bad story for Diana's character.

I just-- listen, as much as I love Chris Pine and as much as I loved WonderTrev in the first movie, I...think the BIGGEST mistake of this movie was framing it around WonderTrev.

Steve was a really important part of Diana's life, and I can see her struggling with her grief, but I just do NOT think it works to have Diana feeling isolated and lonely in Man's World SPECIFICALLY because Steve isn't there with her. Double especially because I think framing this movie around a tragic friendship to enemyhood between Diana and Barbara is so much more effective! A lot of the parts of Diana's character and mythos that make her unique and compelling like the Amazons end up lost in the Steve of it all, and that's SO sad to me because the idea of Diana having to contend with the greed and envy and gluttony for power among humanity is a GREAT story! I just wish it had been framed on a different idea.

Also it was lovely to see Lynda Carter in this movie. Fuck, don't show this post to her. I forgot she's here now. Fuck. Oh god the nerd embarrassment is hitting I'm sorry Lynda

Zack Snyder's Justice League (03/10/2021) --dir. Zack Snyder

Okay, so I WAS a Snyder Cut truther from the beginning. Partly for the meme, and partly because I hated Josstice League so much that I needed to believe there was something better out there, and to my credit (and everyone else's), I was right.

Just because the movie is better AS FAR AS THE STORY GOES though doesn't mean it's not full of the ZS stuff that I'm not a fan of, like a lot of the slomo and tacking on the Knightmare future ending at the end-- I always kind of hated the Knightmare concept and I'm glad we'll never get to see it actually. But DUDE this was SO GOOD.

I especially ADORE all the added content with Cyborg. Ray Fisher is a PHENOMENAL actor and Victor's storyline is absolutely the best part of the movie that makes even the slower parts worth it. Actually, let me tell you WHERE you can watch more stuff he's been in because he absolutely deserves a career boost after all the shit WB put him through:

He was in the HBO series True Detective's third season as a main character, which is obviously on HBO Max along with ZSJL.

He had a role in the ABC series Women of the Movement, which is about Mamie Till-Mobley and the murder of Emmett Till centered on her activism right after his murder. This one you can watch on Hulu or the ABC website itself.

He's also GOING to be in Rebel Moon, which is another Zack Snyder film that is (in theory?) going to be on Netflix in 2023, though I know Charlie Hunnam was just injured on set (yikes hate it not a fan) so it might end up pushed back.

Anyway, my point is this was ABSOLUTELY worth coming back and finishing it, and I'm SO glad it got to see the light of day even if it's kind of almost impossible to rewatch.

The Suicide Squad (08/05/2021)-- dir. James Gunn

Okay, okay, not even going to lie, I LOVED this one, and it's what made me so excited to see James Gunn named co-executive of the DC division at WB. I know James Gunn has a very specific style and approach to writing and directing that you either love or hate, so I can understand why this one isn't going to be everyone's favorite, but I for one had a BLAST with it.

First of all, I'm so glad Rick Flag was able to get a little glow-up before his death. I actually almost didn't think he was the same character, and in a lot of ways he really isn't, but a lot of this movie pulls from the older Ostrander run comics, and I can see a lot of that Rick in this Rick.

I also LOVE all the new characters and think they really demonstrate the power of a great ensemble movie. There's someone for everyone to root for and the healthy mix of newer faces and established names makes for a great cast.

Also I think the fact that this movie is SO strong in its writing is what makes Peacemaker work, but I'll talk more about him specifically in a minute. But like Wonder Woman (weirdly), there's an earnestness and heart at the core of the movie that makes the irreverence and more ridiculous elements work-- it has a larger-than-life conflict and villain and sense of style, but at its core it is really about people just trying to not die, both in the middle of battle and in a world that has REALLY shown them no sympathy.

Peacemaker (01/13/2022-present)-- written by James Gunn

James Gunn is really the guy you get to do your show if your first instinct about the main character is "who the fuck wants a show about THAT guy?"

I came into this show really, really, REALLY not sold on the concept, and then in the last episode, I was in TEARS by the end. I think that this show was, in the end, not just a fun little quarantine project James Gunn put together, but it really does provide a commentary and study on how to empathize with people who are NOT like you and who you DO NOT like, especially when they're willing to open that door to understanding and compassion.

Like, everybody on this team is a little bit of an asshole, yes even Leota, and that's why it WORKS. For a very silly show with a very silly premise and a REFUSAL to take itself too seriously, it does feel very grounded and realistic and like you could get a drink with just about everyone it sets you up to root for. We KNOW the Eleventh Street Kids. We ARE, to some degree, the Eleventh Street Kids. It's very cliche but it's also very true.

The core of this show, like many other James Gunn projects of late, is really about empathy over apathy, and that's what I think struck a chord with me. If you haven't given it a shot yet, I really strongly suggest you do.

Black Adam (10/21/2022)-- dir. Jaume Collet-Sera

Oh, FUCK yeah.

This movie reminded me of Aquaman in a lot of ways, in that there's a lot of deeper themes about colonization and the idea of hero idolatry that you CAN read for the film if you want, but it's also a great movie to just turn your brain off to and watch Mr. The Rock fly around and punch people.

Much like Birds of Prey, I don't know if I'd QUITE call this a Black Adam movie because they do a LOT of make him more front-end heroic-- in wrestling terms, the JSA is largely there to play jobber for Adam until things start heating up with Intergang and Sabbac for the main event-- but it is certainly a fun one.

And I do ADORE the JSA in this movie. Pierce Brosnan is a great Kent Nelson, Aldis Hodge is my FAVORITE Hawkman I've ever seen so far (sorry Falk Hentschel I'm sorry I'm so sorry sir but your writing was CW-standard), and I wanted to see a LOT more out of Cyclone. Atom Smasher was there too I guess idk for some reason he didn't really stick out for me but he was a good kid.

Also ADRIANNA TOMAZ IS THE STRONGEST BITCH IN THIS HOUSE. I felt kind of bad watching the movie because I miss Legends so much that I kept calling her Zari in my head, but in her closer-to-source form, she's FABULOUS. I want to be her when I grow up. She is 100% the real star of this movie and Sarah Shahi did an EXCELLENT job.

I think, now that I'm writing this in a post-Henry Cavill Again Superman world, the post-credits scene is unintentionally really really funny, but in the end, I had a good time with it and I'll look back on it fondly.

Conclusion, Literally

There are exactly four movies left to be released in the DCEU: Shazam 2, Blue Beetle, The Flash, and Aquaman 2.

After that, we really don't know what we're going to get. At least until James Gunn makes his early-next-year announcement (I know I will be waiting on the edge of my seat to find out if I am still getting my Black Canary movie).

When I went to finish this post, I added on Tomorrow Is Not Coming I Guess to the main title, but I also said that didn't really capture how I felt about the future of DC films. I don't really see this as the DCEU dying-- frankly, it never really got off the ground to begin with. After Josstice League flopped, the focus was way more on strong solo films than trying to build a connected universe, which I think actually made it stronger.

At the end of the day, this is the chance to put the characters and storytelling at the forefront, and that's why I have so much faith in the Gunn-Safran team for whatever is coming next. Safran has produced some really strong, character- heavy movies with James Wan and WB. James Gunn is a strong writer with a good head on his shoulders for how to best balance creative freedom for directors with not letting their voice overpower every part of the process.

For whatever comes next to work, it HAS to be a collaborative effort on all parts with no one voice overpowering the other. Tomorrow IS still coming. I have no idea what it will look like. But I know that when it comes, I will rise to meet it, and so will whoever is involved in what comes next.

Also James Gunn, if you're reading this, I will write and direct Booster Gold myself. This is not a joke. I am dead serious. I will do it. I have thoughts already and my DMs are open.

Anyway, share your thoughts freely. You know, without being an ass.

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messmersflame · 1 year

Note

Tell us about your Tav! Name, class and subclass, race, pronouns. Do you have a headcanon for where they're from? Their family? Are they a Dark Urge? Or did you choose an Origin Character? Was it an easy decision? (1)

I HAVE A FEW but i will talk abt my main blorbo, Zeal.

Zeal (they/them) is a Mephistopheles tiefling, Blue Draconic Ancestor Sorcerer/Paladin of Vengeance.

originally i did go for durge, but when uh... yknow the first straight up MURDER happened i realised it was a bit too intense for me on a first run, and remade them with a custom origin with the Criminal background.

now for the long info dump. buckle up.

they were from Baldur's Gate, the city itself!! their parents were actually nobles, from families that were like. very big on their draconic lineage and would plan out marriages and bloodlines based on dragon type and magical strength.

ofc this means they were huge snobs with massive egos. aspirations of hubris. LOVED gortash. they wanted MORE power through and got involved with the diabolists in the city, eventually leading to mummy and daddy making a pact with Mr Mephy for more power. and in return? why, the soul of their first born, naturally!

and then Zeal was born as a full blown tiefling, and the snobby human parents were like :/ well we didn't expect THAT to happen :/

and abandoned their newborn baby on the street somewhere. Zeal was lucky enough to be heard crying by a passer by, who took them to the local temple of Tyr. and that's where they spent most of their childhood.

considering what they were wrapped up in the temple KNEW who their parents were, but kept it a secret, including from Zeal themself. they belived they were protecting the child by doing so. in their early teens, Zeal found out, got VERY upset at it being a secret and left the temple to go see their parents, deludedly thinking they'd welcome them back. they did NOT.

their parents actually attacked them and decided 'ok well to hide this we're just going to sacrifice you to mephistopheles right quick ok?'

they ended up killing their parents in self defense during the attempted sacrifice. this is also how they got their facial scars!! traumatised and disallusioned they just kind of. wandered the streets until they fell in with the Guild and became a criminal lol.

and Zeal, not really knowing why they were alive or what any purpose they had could be, just kind of let the Guild use their powers as a sorcerer for whatever. a lot of nasty stuff got done with thanks to their magic. they have a lot of guilt and regret around this part of their life.

as they were first coming of age, Zeal REALLY fell into a pit of identity and existential crisis. it was at this time when they were wandering the alleyways that they happened across a small secret shrine to Talos, God of destruction. it was there that they actually had a small chat with him which basically summed up as 'let me give you purpose and make you an instrument of my will. bring destruction in my name.' since they were desperate for some kind of direction, they accepted and made an oath to Talos without really thinking about it.

cue MORE regret. Talos is not a kind god, and enjoys destruction, killing, and war just for the sake of conflict. again, Zeal begun to realise that they were being used. again. they had been taken advantage of in a vulnerable and confused state and made to do more bad things.

so they broke their oath. mechanically obvs they can't have started the game as an oath breaker, but canonically they already were one by the time they got kidnapped and tadpoled. when they got nabbed, they were essentially working as a glaive-for-hire and attempting to find their own way by their own rules and morals. they also named themself before the start of the game, Zeal wasn't always their name, but it is now. it's the one they chose.

later in the actual game, they eventually find their connection and faith in Bahamut, and swear a new oath, this time of their own true choice, and become a Paladin of Vengeance for Bahamut.

#bg3 #YAY THANK U #zeal

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shadowmaat · 2 years

Text

That's not how it works

I read Backpacking Through Bedlam recently and there was a scene involving another character that had me going ???. Clearly something big had happened in Calculated Risks, which I hadn't read yet, so I decided to remedy that immediately.

I am... bemused? Bothered? Disconcerted by events at the end of Risks and I feel the need to vent about it a bit, so there will be spoilers beyond this point. If the author is reading this: I don't think I'm saying anything you shouldn't read (like plot ideas) and I'm not requesting any answers or explanations, I'm just trying to sort it out for myself.

OK. So. Near the end of Risks Sarah is doing Complicated Math to try and get everyone back to their home dimension but is running out of space to do it. There's a very good chance she'll have to delete most of herself to make it happen and that still might not work since she needs to be herself to complete the equation.

While she's locked in this struggle and unaware of her surroundings, Artie comes up and, for reasons unknown, touches her arm. This has the effect of blasting the leftover bits of the equation into his head so Sarah can finish what she's doing and get them all home.

When she wakes up she finds out that Artie is comatose and basically brain dead. Her own analogy compares it to a reformatted hard drive: it's blank and awaiting input.

I can see how this is horrifically traumatic and that she'd feel responsible for it even if it wasn't her intent and she didn't actively do anything. I can also understand how heartbreaking it'd be to realize the love of your life is gone and that the rest of your/his family is going to suffer for it as well. What she chooses to do next is morally ambiguous at best and leaning more towards an obscene act of selfishness and hubris.

Early in the book we learn that Sarah accidentally erased herself from the memories of the people she brought with her. It wasn't intentional and the logic was a bit dubious, but it was still understandable from a self-sacrificing idiot POV.

Deciding to rewrite Artie from scratch was none of those things.

For a character who does a lot of hand-wringing over "consent" and making sure she doesn't hurt anyone she sure was willing to do what she wanted without telling any of the gathered family what Artie's condition was or what she planned to do about it.

Look, I can accept a whole lot of weirdness from the Cryptidverse. The author does a fantastic job of weaving the incredulous into the ordinary and making it all work. I love the series. I have no problem accepting wild leaps the plot sometimes takes. But this? It goes too far for me.

Taking a "blank" brain and filling it full of a chaos of memories from a wide variety of other people (and the mice) is nowhere near the same thing as recreating a person on their own. The resulting personality would be a mess as everyone has their own interpretation of who someone is and none of that is a match to who the person actually is. Even with psychics in the mix that isn't going to help.

The fact that Artie woke up and was remotely coherent is a testament to the Power of Narrative, I guess. The book ended there so we didn't get to see the immediate aftermath (though that could come in a later book). We do get some hints from Bedlam that things may not be perfectly meshed as Artie apparently has increasing episodes of going blank and distant, but even that doesn't have a lot of context since the protag of the book doesn't know what happened.

I can't see any of this turning out well. I can't see a hasty patchwork of memories resulting in a fully-functioning person, let alone a pre-existing personality. Artie 2.0 is going to be vastly different from the Original Recipe and only time will tell how different.

My personal feeling is that things with Artie are going to get very, very bad. I don't see how they couldn't, but if the author chooses to make it all work (more or less) I'll just have to start skipping the books he's in. Which is fine. Author's world, author's choice and all that. I'm just not sure I can tread that path forward.

I'm very sad for all the characters involved, including Artie 2.0. What Sarah did was unforgivable, IMO, and while I had high hopes for them as a pairing that's over now. Maybe Artie 2.0 will emerge as his own fully-realized and interesting character (somehow), but he isn't going to be Artie and I can't in good conscience picture him getting together with Sarah. Even leaving aside that he's a different person now there's still what she did to him. That kind of love isn't really love and it's very dangerous. We may yet get to see just how dangerous it is.

#Calculated Risks spoilers #just mapping my feelings on it #NOT A CRITICISM #or criticism of a character but not the writing

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give-soup-please · 2 years

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Do you think you'll ever return here soupman? I don't mean like returning to writing stuff like this, just, returning to this blog? Maybe reclaiming it as a soup-based blog? Or will you leave it forever? As much as I love archival stuff (I have a bad memory so preserving things as they are helps me remember), I think I'll miss you. Not your writings, you. So yeah, will you ever come back?

Longer post below the cut (very, very, long. you've been warned), but here's the TLDR: Right now, I can't say whether or not i'm going to do anything more with this blog or leave it as is.

This blog has too many attachments for me to abandon it entirely, but I don't really know what people would like to see me do next, and I am very, very confused by people's responses to me leaving. If you want more detail and context, keep reading.

I really wish I had a solid answer for you, anon. I find myself a little confused, to be honest. I've always tried to pull myself off of rambling and ranting in posts and tags, because I assumed people were 100% here for my TSP content and nothing else. I often try not to do commentary in the posts, and put it in brackets so people recognize it and skip over it if they'd like. But more and more people are showing that they care about the person behind the posts? and I????

In the grand scheme of things, I always assumed I was just some guy who liked TSP a little too much. Good lord, I ramble about the narrator so much sometimes. For goodness sake, I commissioned the VA for some work, which even though it's been a few months, still gets me giggly and blushy when I think about it. Who does that? Who am I, in all of this?

But you didn't come here for my confusion, you came for an answer to a fair question. Truth is, I don't know yet. On one hand, it seems a bit silly to say, "never will i ever return to this blog or TSP, good day." because- life changes. circumstances change. The narrator has changed due to the events of ultra deluxe, and writing for him has changed me as well. On the other, I genuinely don't know what content people would want to see. There's another anon in my inbox who's message I've been staring at all day, where they also asked what will happen to me and whether or not I'd give occasional updates, because they often wonder if the people are alright when their blogs go silent. This is very sweet! I don't want the person who asked that to be embarrassed. But I'm honestly very confused that I'm cared about, outside the context of what I do. I don't understand it at all, to be honest.

I'll let you in on a little secret, for those of you who have read this far. If it weren't for college, I'd keep going. Forever, if I could. If things went my way, the narrator and I would spend all day together, drafting and redrafting, laughing and enjoying each other's company. Because I recognize he's a fictional character, but- at the same time, he also lives in my head. Not as part of a system, I don't have DID, but I carry a lot of fictional characters with me because that's how I coped with growing up the way I did. It was bad business. Those who read the tags carefully might know that I ran away from home a few years ago. My characters helped me stay afloat in what would have otherwise been an impossible situation. I am very, very attached to them.

But I need this degree. Things are complicated on my end. The only guarantee I have for housing involves a deal I made with certain people to pursue a higher education. I can't take my time with it any longer, I have to push forward as a full time student in order to receive what I need. If I don't do what I'm told, I'm at risk for homelessness. Before this, I had been going to community college for four years, taking my time and making excuses. My hubris has caught up with me, and now I've got to go at full speed.

I am not letting these characters go, they're being pried from my fingers along with my free time. I am working on accepting this, on saying goodbye. It's difficult. The grief is overwhelming, but, and here's a funny thing:

A game about free will and the lack thereof, about stanley who is a puppet of the player, and the narrator, who doesn't have much choice either.

Me, a writer, a lover of this game, living a life that's out of my control, and not having options. A predetermined path stretches out ahead, and I walk it.

Familiar story, huh?

I will not be able to handle both this blog and a full course load. A few people have asked me to keep going, to do both. They do not know me as well as I know myself.

On top of that, writing for other people is kind of... stressful. I've always been a 'ride or die' style artist, pushing and straining myself. The way in which I work is not healthy for me. To have that attitude towards school and my hobbies would probably destroy me. I love the prompts people send in, I don't want them to feel bad about it. However, my attitude and approach needs some work. Which is why the blog has an end date, just under a week before classes start.

It sucks. I have no desire to give up what I'm doing, but it's responsible and it makes sense. I think of the narrator near the end of the 'not stanley' ending, and my heart breaks a little.

"I don't know... What's the answer? What do I do? What do I do? What do I- No I have to. I have to shut the game down. I have to. I have to."

Doing the right thing is always hard. I have a few regrets. I regret not starting this blog sooner. I regret what I'll be leaving behind. I regret the choices I've made that have made other choices unavoidable.

But I do not regret my time here. I do not regret the 60k+ (and counting!) words that I've written. I do not regret filling my time with joy. I do not regret the friends I've made thanks to this community.

And thanks to this community, it's been the best summer of my life.

#personal #not tsp related

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wutheringmights · 3 years

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Can I be greedy and ask for all of the boys ? And any characters you have strong opinions on? Pretty please? With lots of cherries and chocolate on top? ( for the ask meme ofc)

Anon, I'll finish up all of the boys in the Chain just for you. And trust me, I have an Infinite Amount of Strong Opinions. You have no idea how Opinionated I Am.

If anyone is coming in late to this, here are the boys I have done already and a short summary of my thoughts (click the hyperlinks to get the full Opinion):

Warriors: he's best when he's the trashy anti-Link, and I like him so much

Twilight: kind of boring, but I have a soft spot for him anyway because you never forget your first

Wind: should have been aged up a little so that he can have that identity crisis I'm craving

This... gets long. Really long. 3-hours-of-work-long. Before you read, please note that even when I speak negatively about something, it’s not to diss anyone who does like the thing. I’m not vague posting or being passive aggressive. This is all written in good humor and good faith.

That being said, let’s a-go!

-Sky-

What I love about them: He has one of the best character arcs of all the Links. I love that he starts off being lazy and kind of a jerk, but grows as a person because he wants to save his friend. And I love that he's truly the most courageous Link. He has no other successful hero of past or legacy to lean back upon to reassure him. He walked into that fight with Demise with no assurance from anyone that he would succeed. Yet, he does it anyway. Because he's a true hero and someone had to be one. And he's rewarded with a curse that he does not initially take seriously. He thinks he's saved everyone, yet he's cursed his spirit, possibly his bloodline, and his entire legacy of the kingdom of Hyrule into a doomed cycle of destruction. All because he dared to face evil incarnate. I love him.

What I hate about them: You know how I called Twilight boring? I should have saved that critique for Sky. LU Sky is actually the most boring interpretation of his character. All of his negative traits? Gone. All of his positives? Also gone. He's the blandest version of himself, and like Twilight, I now feel like I gotta add some spice to him to make him more interesting while still keeping him recognizable. Even so, he's still one of my favorite Links.

Favorite Moment/Quote: When he kicks Twilight's ass at sword fighting. That's stuff is *chef's kiss*

What I would like to see more focus on: You would think that there would be more angst out there about him realizing that he's actually been cursed, but it's still kind of hard to find. He's the Cursed Knight! The beginning of a terrible legacy! Imagine meeting a bunch of heroes for the first time, and instead of being relieved at having someone who understands your experiences, you're filled with horror at realizing that your victory was a false one. You didn't win. Your spirit will never be at rest. Imagine dealing with that realization for the rest of your life. You could never be at peace.

What I would like to see less focus on: I love that he loves his wife, but he's more just the fact that he's married, y'know? I would like to see a little less blind devotion to Hylia and Zelda, and more complicated feelings about being manipulated into being the hero.

Favorite pairing with: Sun/Link/Groose OT3! I have no reasoning behind this other than I like Groose and Groose definitely had a crush on SkSw Link.

Favorite friendship: I won't answer Groose again even if I want to, so I'll say Warriors. I cannot begin to describe how elite this friendship would be if you gave it a chance. They're just two boys dealing with unique positions of leadership and responsibility. They would probably even bond over being shitheads at different ends of the shithead spectrum. It's so good, okay?

NOTP: Ghirahim. I'm not too adverse to this one, but the ship hinges on whether you can redeem Ghirahim or not. In my opinion, Ghirahim is awesome because he's such a fun villain. Redeeming him ruins the fun.

Favorite headcanon: I have a whole life story planned out for Sky. Basically, he lives to be close to 500 years old by the power of the Triforce. He is the Link throughout the Era of Chaos who banishes the Dark Interlopers to the Twilight Realm and seals the Triforce in the Sacred Realm. He actually seals himself in the Sacred Realm as well to keep the Triforce safe, and he fought Ganondorf in when he broke in. Sky, like Time and Wind, does not get a happy ending.

-Four-

What I love about them: Four is origin of the heroes of Hyrule being known for being children. What a legacy to leave behind. He's such an interesting case of an incarnation of the Hero's Spirit, too. He fought Vaati, and he did his job so well that Demise's next incarnation had to be Ganondorf. Four did his job the best out of everyone, and it came at the cost of creating a magic sword that changed him permanently. I like to think that the Four Sword was not meant to split him, that it was a mistake he made with the design. And it's sad, isn't it? You made a defective sword, and like any good sword, it has a symbolic double edge. It gifted you with so much, and yet he can never be the same again. And his story is never well-remembered because it is overshadowed by the Links who fought the King of Evil. He's does so much, yet his legacy is underappreciated.

What I hate about them: I want to prepare you for this Opinion, because I know it's unpopular. Are you ready? Okay. I don't like the Colors. I'm sorry. I want to like them, but they don't interest me at all. Because they are parts of Four’s personality, they have to be one-note archetypes which does not make for exciting storytelling. I also haven't found a fic yet that has been from Four's POV that did the internal monologue of the Colors in a way that wasn't a pain in the ass to read. Maybe if someone can figure out how to do the Colors in a way that doesn't feel like a drag, I would like them more. But in the end, I think Four himself is more interesting than the Colors.

Favorite Moment/Quote: The fact that he didn't want to touch the Master Sword because he doesn't trust magic swords. That is every I need to know about his opinion on his own adventures.

What I would like to see more focus on: I want more of Four as Four. It's getting harder to find content of Four being his own person first and the Colors second.

What I would like to see less focus on: Four being the Colors first and his own person second. There is something about viewing Four as this cover identity for the Colors that doesn't feel right. There's a balance that needs to be strike between his ability to split, how that affects his every day life, and his own identity of being Four. I think I may have read one fic that hit that sweet spot for me, but still.

Favorite pairing with: Shadow. I'm such a sucker for befriending and falling for the enemy. That is all.

Favorite friendship: Dot! Their friendship is super cute. I like the idea of them being super close when they were younger and struggling to keep the friendship going as they age due to how much their paths in life diverge.

NOTP: This isn't necessarily a Four or an LU problem, but people who ship the Colors together? Bro. C'mon.

Favorite headcanon: I'm torn between two different Four and the Master Sword headcanons. On one hand, Four thinking that the Master Sword is just legend until he meets Sky and everyone else is just a fun idea. He sees the legendary sword for the first time and his mind is blown. On the other hand, I also like my Four with a side of hubris. What if he had the option on his quest to draw the Master Sword himself? What if he could tell that if he did that, the consequences would be terrible. He's not sure what would happen, but he knows it would be terrible. So he decided to make his own sword instead to disastrous results. Wouldn't that be tragic or what?

-Time-

What I love about them: Last winter, I did a two hour powerpoint for my friends about the Legend of Zelda timeline. During that powerpoint, I was rating every iteration of Link. What I said about the Hero of Time then holds true to my thoughts of LU Time now. Time is the original Link, more so than Sky in the lore and Legend/Hyrule in real life. Every other hero is a reflection of him. So the fact that his story is about the loss of childhood and the tragedy of that is incredible, and you can see those themes reflected in every other game. Moreso, he’s the only Link with a confirmed tragic ending. Not only does he end his life unsatisfied, but his adventure is failure on every timeline. In the adult timeline, Hyrule is swallowed by the sea. In the child one, Ganondorf returns again. In the fallen timeline, Hyrule fell. I like the idea since that the games themselves are the legends that are past down about each hero, Hylians have also remembered Time as a tragic figure. Yet, they also remember that the happy moments for his life come from small acts of kindness. Even someone as sad as him finds joy in helping others, even if it’s just to small deeds that will not be heralded as grand heroic quests. It’s beautiful.

What I hate about them: This is more about Mask than Time, but Mask is not an adult in a child’s body. He did not rewind time in Termina enough to be considered mentally an adult. He’s a young teenager at best, and that’s me being generous. He is a child who was forced to be an adult and despite the gods being done with him, he cannot conceive of ever having a childhood again. So he can say all he wants that he’s an adult, but he is not. That’s just what he thinks he is.

Favorite Moment/Quote: Anytime we get a flashback to him being a younger adult is great. I want to see more of his in this his early adulthood.

What I would like to see more focus on: I think I just want more of Time being... not a bad leader, but being an imperfect one. I honestly think he’s only the leader because he’s the oldest and enough of the heroes recognize the title of Hero of Time. But he is not the leader type, and he is struggling to keep it together and has to defer to Twilight and Warriors for help a lot.

What I would like to see less focus on: I’m not the biggest fan of Dad!Time for any of the Links. He’s not emotionally ready for it. And I think he defaults to treating the boys like adults because that’s how he wanted to be treated when he was their age.

Favorite pairing with: Malon. He has this great partnership of equal respect with her and it’s just. So good.

Favorite friendship: Linebeck. I know. This exists only in my head. But if these two ever meet, you cannot convince me that they would not get along swimmingly. It would be so good (once Linebeck gets over his crush on Time and stops hitting on him, of course).

NOTP: Child Timeline Zelda. Let me explain: I fully believe in Bi Time supremacy, and when in OoT, he definitely had a crush on Sheik. However, one of the worst parts of rewinding time and being in the child timeline is that Zelda is a completely different person now. They may have been friends in the other timeline, but her life experiences are completely different now. She is not the same person as he once knew. And it’s tragic to know someone as who they could have been, not as they are.

Favorite headcanon: After Termina, Time spent a lot of time with the Nabooru because out of everyone he knew, she’s the only who took him seriously even as a child. She has big older sister energy, and he considers her a part of his family. However, being treated as such made it easier for him to ignore his issues and put off his healing process by a few years.

-Legend-

What I love about them: Veteran of Heroes! What a freaking title. I love that he keeps on finding adventures, and that he keeps hustling. Even if he complains about never getting a break, you can tell that he loves helping others. He loves being on the road, never settling down, and finding adventure after adventure. Honestly, if any of the Links had a calling to be a hero, it’s him. Is he tired? Sure. Is he a little jaded after having saved Hyrule and a bunch of other kingdoms multiple times? Yes. But at the end of the day, he likes being a hero. This is who he is. His complaining is not genuine; he just plays the martyr because, at this point, he’s earned the right to.

What I hate about them: If you can’t tell by now, I have a, uh, different interpretation of Legend from popular canon. Fandom Legend is not right to me. He is unrecognizable. It is hard to write him because I feel like I have to balance what other people think Legend should be versus how I think he is. The people who are big Legend enjoyers probably feel the same way about my version of Warriors, and that’s fine. I’m not going to gel with every character and I don’t expect everyone to gel with how I see characters either. It’s goes both ways, y’know.

Favorite Moment/Quote: I like how subtly he tried to approach the Wolfie problem at first, trying to ask questions and get more proof before confronting Twilight. It’s a good touch.

What I would like to see more focus on: If I had to choose one thing, it’s this one throw away line about him never wanting to settle down. I’m telling you, folks! He likes his lifestyle! And did you see him when he does presenting the origins of the hero? He’s not bitter about being a hero! Legend is moody, but he is not angsty about the whole hero thing. Have fun with him please!

What I would like to see less focus on: If you can’t tell by now, Legend is my least favorite Link. There is a lot I want to see less of, but just to name one thing, it’s the headcanon that Fable is his sister. I live and die by common born Link, and whether he’s a legitimate heir or the royal bastard, I am more than bored with the persistent Prince!Legend content.

Favorite pairing with: Marin. It’s a good tragic story and I like it well enough. She’s cute, and he’s cute with her.

Favorite friendship: Warriors. I’m with everyone else on these two have peak sibling energy. They tease and pick on each other, but only they are allowed to mess with each other. They’re each other’s bully, and it’s always good to see.

NOTP: I do not have enough energy to have a lot of strong opinions about Legend’s romantic relationships, but I will mentioned that I have lost a lot of love for Ravio recently and am liking seeing him with Legend less and less. I have no better reason for this than the fact that I finally played ALBW and hate how many of my hard earned rupees he’s taken from me by withholding important, lifesaving items. Rat bastard.

Favorite headcanon: Remember my headcanon about him being the coolest bad boy folk hero on the block because everyone thinks he kidnapped Zelda? Yeah, I still stand by that one. I did good there.

-Hyrule-

What I love about them: If there is any Link that I would call a gutter rat, it is this one. I struggle a bit to talk about Hyrule since his games gives us so little, but in the end, I always fall back on him being a hero of the people. He is the one who has nothing and relates the best to people who are at their lowest. Yet, he is still a hero. He earns the right to be a hero because he helped Impa in her time of need. He’s selfless and competent. Even if he never got a traditional education, I bet he’s wicked smart too. He is the Link that symbolizes all of the parts of the Triforce the most. And, god. I cannot talk about him without mentioning the blood sacrifice part of LA. It’s such a cool concept, and I cannot imagine what it must be like to go from being the rough and tumble, win-at-all-costs fighting to protecting yourself first because if you don’t, the consequences are disastrous. It’s paradoxical, and it must be such a different mindset to fall into. But it must also be a blessing in disguise since now he has a reason to finally care about himself.

What I hate about them: Who started the Hyrule is innocent headcanon? Come over here because we need to exchange some words. If there is anyone who would be a realist and know how the world works, it’s this guy. And while we’re here, who came up with the Hryule is always lost headcanon? I also have some words for you. And you know what? WHILE WE’RE HERE, who let him be named Hyrule? I’m have more than choice words for you. His name scheme is the bane of my existence and the express reason why I don’t write him more. God.

Favorite Moment/Quote: That one panel where he takes utter delight in Warriors hiding from his scorned lovers? That is a central pillar in my understanding of Hyrule.

What I would like to see more focus on: Again, his relationship with other people. Even if his games are lacking in NPCs, we know from lore that he’s a good guy who will jump in to help others. He must know plenty of people, and I want to see who exists in his world with him.

What I would like to see less focus on: I have an on-going joke with my brother that certain characters are Catholic, even if Catholicism does not exist in the world of the thing we’re watching or playing. Of course, we’re not being serious. we’re just joshing around. So imagine the gut punch I feel whenever I see people say Hyrule is Christian and realize that they’re being serious. I just can’t take it seriously.

Favorite pairing with: Aurora. It’s cute and I’m a sucker for that hero and royalty dynamic, especially when the hero is a peasant. It’s so cheesy, but I love it.

Favorite friendship: Legend. But not the way everyone else pairs them up as the grumpy one and the sunshine one. I think of it more as them being the pinnacle of boys being boys. They’re shitheads. They do stupid shit together. They both have a dark sense of humor. They joke that they’re practically the same person sometimes.

NOTP: uhhhhhhhhh.... Is he paired with anyone else?

Favorite headcanon: I love the idea that he just likes his way of life and refuses to accept anyone saying otherwise. Legend wants to teach him to read? Sorry, but he’s never had to read before in his life so he’s pretty sure he’ll never need it anyway. Want to participate in the treasured Hylian tradition of piercing your ears when you come of age? Why would he ever do that when a monster could rip those earrings off? He’s stuck in his ways and it frustrates everyone else to no end, but he has no interest in ever changing.

-Wild-

What I love about them: When I was 9, I spent my time online on Legend of Zelda forums. I remember one of my forum friends saying that they wanted a Legend of Zelda game where Link lost. And I think of that friend whenever I think about Wild. BOTW Link is the best Link that has ever been. He is the epitome of every trait we associate with any Link. He’s smart and sassy. He’s hard working and kind. But underlining all of that is the fact that he’s still the one who failed. If Demise’s Curse in SkSw is the set-up, the Great Calamity is the payoff. And I haven’t even talked about how confirming him as being non-verbal before the Calamity does so much for his characterization. I don’t even know where to start or how to articulate it. By game storyline alone, Wild is one of my favorites.

What I hate about them: You guys knew this one was coming, but I’m going to have to say it anyway. Fandom Wild.... not good. I’ve said it for half of these boys so far, but god is it true. I have a way I see Wild that is rarely done in the fandom. Fandom Wild has a lot of the traits I also see in Wild, but to all of the extremes. I will mention one thing in particular as being a pet peeve, and it’s how some people headcanon him as always being nonverbal. I know what they’re trying to do, and I think they’re on to something, but they’re also missing the point of what BOTW Link’s character arc is. I just wish more people would forget fandom and work more off of the games for how to characterize him.

Favorite Moment/Quote: Weirdly enough, my favorite moment is when he got mad at everyone for making fun of his Gerudo outfit, so he dumped Goron Spice in his cooking. It’s encapsulates a part of his character I think a lot of people forget about.

What I would like to see more focus on: I think he has a really complicated relationship with his past. He said himself that his old self felt like a different person, and I think that should be explored a lot more. That idea actually fascinates me so much that instead of CTB, I almost wrote a character study fic about Wild. His emotions are not as simple as feeling guilty about letting his friends die and not preventing the Calamity. His emotions would be so complicated and because I don’t have the time to explore it, someone else needs to do it for me.

What I would like to see less focus on: There is a weird fascination with Wild having memory loss and essentially being like a kid again. And this feels infantilizing to me. It honestly bugs me a lot every time I see it.

Favorite pairing with: I can’t decide between Zelda, Mipha, and Revali. They’re all different dynamics and they’re all good.

Favorite friendship: Paya. I firmly believe that Paya is Wild’s best friend. I am the only one in the world who believes this. But I am also the only one in the world who is correct.

NOTP: Wild is good with everyone. Good for him!

Favorite headcanon: An essential scene of my Wild character study I will never write is one where his horse dies. He goes into shock and walks back to Kakariko to talk to Impa. But once he goes to her, he breaks down in tears and has an absolute melt down over the horse. And Impa sagely says, “It’s not about the horse, is it?” She’s implying that he’s actually mourning the loss of his friends, Hyrule, his life, everything-- but through his tears, he keeps tell her that she’s wrong. He barely remembers them. He doesn’t know them. He doesn’t have any feelings about them. He just really loved that horse. But Impa refuses to listen to him, just repeating over and over again: “it’s not really about the horse.”

And that’s it! That’s all of my opinions! I know a lot of my opinions are polarizing, but everything I said is in good faith, and I am not trying to diss anyone for how they approach these characters.

I welcome you to send me your Opinions on the Links, even if it’s just to disagree with me. I’m cool with it, and I like knowing what everyone else thinks!

#so there are my polarizing opinions #heed my note at the beginning and end about acting in good faith #anyway if you read all of this you are obligated to tell me some of your headcanons and opinions #sorry i don't make the rules except i actually do #linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu #lu sky #lu four #lu time #lu legend #lu hyrule #lu wild #lu twilight #lu wind #lu warriors #me rambling #ask #anonymous

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vyeoh · 3 years

Note

this is your chance: wax poetic about an Empires or DSMP character of your choice to a fan who is new to both. Explain why I should love them. I need guidance in this new and meme-populated land.

okok this is a lot of pressure haha. Spoilers for EmpiresSMP and DreamSMP below, obviously. I wrote a lot so prepare yourself, anon

I watch a lot of empires POVs but the ones I most anticipate every week are Scott and Sausage.

c!Scott (I'll call him Smajor for the sake of simplicity) starts off the series chilling, not really getting involved with the rest of the server, and staying aggressively neutral. After all, he's an elf. He has lived far longer than most of the other rulers already, and will most likely outlive them for many years. So, the best thing is to stick to his mountains and not get invested in the dealings of mortal affairs, maybe sometimes causing problems on purpose and dipping because what's life without a little spice right.

But then, this demon comes to the server, Xornoth. He's going around causing havoc and wants to send the world into an eternal winter, but he doesn't bother the kingdom of Rivendell much so Smajor stays tentatively cautious but ultimately unbothered. But then, the puzzle pieces start falling together. The first thing that the audience noticed was was Xornoth sounded like Smajor, but we mostly thought that this was just due to cc!Scott voicing both of them and there was nothing more to it. However, then, the people the demon starts possessing start chanting in elvish. The demon hates mortals, and the elves are conveniently one of the two confirmed not fully mortal races in Empires.

This culminates when Smajor stumbles across a cave that contains the backstory of the patron god of Rivendell, Aeor. Basically, there's two opposing forces, Aeor and Exor, and both have a champion. In a previous life, those champions were two brothers, where Aeor eventually prevailed and banished Exor. In this life though, the champions are - you guessed it - Smajor, and the demon Xornoth.

So now Smajor is like. Well fuck. It's my literal god-given destiny to be responsible for defeating this demon who is technically my brother, and if I fail the server gets plunged into an eternal winter. And I have no fucking clue what is happening because I've just been here on this mountain actively trying to stay out of the issues outside my kingdom. We watch him panic and teeter on the verge of spiraling for an entire episode, and when the followers of Xornoth go to the End to kill the dragon, releasing Xornoth's full powers, he fails to stop him. Smajor is a character who was used to being the smart one, the prepared one, the one who has the least deaths on the server. But he's also a character who runs away from his problems and ignores them. Before and during the dragon fight, we hear the desperation in his voice, as he's thrown into a situation he is wholly unprepared for, and it's bigger than him going to the Cod Empire to kill their king, or assisting in other people's plans to kill the codfather. He can't run from this. cc!Scott plays this scene so well as well, as I've said before, one of the best parts of Scott's acting is how he's never super dramatic, but he's so effective in the little things like inflection to make you feel, viscerally, the panic and dread.

So after the dragon fight, Smajor realizes, I can't do this on my own. I've tried and failed. So he gets allies. We watch him, someone who has so strongly been an isolationist, learn the benefits of allies and watch him learn to trust others and watch him learn how to get that trust in return.

My favorite thing about Smajor's characterization is that he's an incompetent protagonist, but not in the way of the "plucky young adventurer". He's capable skill-wise, and fairly jaded and very pessimistic. However, his issue is that up until recently, he did not care about the rest of the server at all, and by the time he learned to, it was way too late.

Also, in 3rd Life, cc!Scott and cc!Jimmy were canonically married and they reference it sometimes in Empires. Like, Scott goes over to the Cod Empire every so often both in and out of character to kill and/or flirt with Jimmy, the ruler of the Cod Empire, which may develop as a secondary plot into the future who knows. So ty Scott for giving the gays what they want o7

Now onto Sausage: his is a story of Icarus, his hubris and ambition being his downfall. He's one of the two followers of Xornoth, who promised him endless power in exchange for his servitude. He started the series being eccentric, but not outright unhinged, but slowly gets more and more extreme as the series progresses, as he gets brought more and more to Xornoth's side.

One of the best parts of Sausage's character, in my opinion, is how his gradual corruption affects the people around him. Initially, he got into a conflict with the Cod Empire and was allied with two other people in the Witherrose alliance. They were allies, but also close friends. The fandom liked to joke that the three had sibling energy, and I'm pretty sure the ccs played to that even more lol.

It was painful to watch the other two members, Gem and fWhip, watch Sausage get corrupted right in front of them, and see them desperately clinging on to this old idea of Sausage in their head because if they faced the truth, it would mean that their friend was gone. Eventually, they do finally cut him out of the alliance, leading him to fully commit to the side of the demon. Sausage felt very clearly betrayed by this, and declared the remaining two Witherrose alliance members to be enemies.

He gets more and more possessed, and we even see the other Empires, his enemies even, slowly realize that something is very wrong with the ruler of Mythland. He starts doing more and more evil things, like killing people more, making sacrifices to the demon, and eventually helping to kill the dragon to free Xornoth. So things are good for Sausage, for a bit. He won, and is more powerful than ever. Then he finds out: he's going to die. Xornoth's possession is slowly killing his soul, and eventually, his body going to be fully taken over and he himself is going to be trapped in the spirit realm. So how do you react to this? Over the next few episodes, we watch Sausage struggle between "the demon is literally killing me" and "the demon has given me so much, and I love it", all while Xornoth takes over more and more of him. We hear him exclaim that "don't worry!! I'm still about 15% there!" while trying to downplay every time Xornoth completely takes over his body. We watch him willingly oppose anyone who is trying to end the thing that is killing him.

My favorite thing about Sausage is that he is undoubtedly evil and proud of it, but he's also undoubtedly human. If you like to watch evil characters go absolutely feral, he's the guy for you. He makes the deal with Xornoth in the beginning, knowing and fully embracing the evilness of the demon, but at the same time he knows what he's doing is detrimental to both himself and everyone around him, but he's gotten in way too deep at this point, and to be fair the demon has held up its end fo the bargain, right?

Also, I would be damned if I don't talk about cc!Sausage's editing. Every one of his videos is like a movie. The way he does camera angles and uses music is so skillful- every lore scene feels like something out of a high fantasy action saga (think: LotR). Every big lore event I always wait in anticipation for Sausage's ep because his editing truly takes lore to another level.

I'm just generally very excited to see where this series goes. Empires is such a good mix of talented builders and good lore. Part of the reason why the series is so immersive for me, beyond any other lore smp, is that they have the settings to back it up. There is a certain charm to the DreamSMP's objectively terrible builds (with a few exceptions) but in Empires, the settings help sell the plot so much.

Another part of why I love EmpiresSMP is how much the ccs are involved with the fan community. I'm sure you've seen the memes about Scott being on tumblr, and Sausage regularly goes through the EmpiresSMP fanart tag on Twitter and likes art, even ones not related to Mythland. Most of the ccs, in fact, have brought up tumblr content on stream at some point or another. Like, several ccs have said that they read tumblr lore theories and hcs and stuff and sometimes take inspiration from them. Fun fact: Rivendell's church was inspired by my pinned drawing; confirmed by Scott Smajor himself. It's just such a good cycle of ccs and fans being excited about each other.

As for DreamSMP, I'm gonna be honest here, the only person I really am invested in in Technoblade. I started watching when he joined the server, and he's the only person whose lore I keep up to date with.

Techno's fun to watch because he's like the Deadpool of DreamSMP. Virtually unkillable, very skilled and scary, but consistently cracks jokes and breaks the 4th wall during plot. His POV is just fun. Like, he does wild plans and gives speeches and some of the stuff that happens to him should be called deus ex machine if it wasn't for the fact that Technoblade is the one who's doing it, and all the stuff is grounded in the fact that cc!Techno is just that good at the game.

However, the fact that he rarely takes anything seriously makes the few times Techno is 100% serious so much more impactful. His whole character has a basis in being perceived as inhuman and being treated as such, and therefore in return trying to hide his humanity. So, when he shows that humanity, whether that's fear, anger, or genuine love for his friends, it really makes you go "oh shit."

Techno's often said not to have character development, but I'd argue that while he remains steadfast in his moral code, he develops leaps and bounds as a person. Like, at the beginning, he's brought onto the server to help Wilbur and Tommy overthrow a government; them knowing he's 1) an anarchist and 2) very very powerful. His character was more of a plot device at that point and was treated as such in the canon. Wilbur and Tommy straight-up lie to him about their plans to establish another government after they overthrow the current one, while he was led on to believe that they were abolishing all governments in the area. But he isn't a plot device. He's a person, as much as he only shows the terrifying, blood god side of himself.

After the establishment of New Lmanburg (the new government its a long story), his friend Phil joins. And for the first time, we see him be fully human with someone and we see someone treat him like a human. Like, we saw glimpses before, with Wilbur and Tommy in Pogtopia, but Phil is the first person we noticeably see he trusts 100%. Then Doomsday happens, and Techno essentially retires to the tundra. During this time, we see Techno learn to be more human, first with Ranboo, then Niki when he establishes the Syndicate. In fact, the two of them, along with Phil, canonically throw him a birthday party, which is a far cry from his treatment in Pogtopia.

Techno's development is one of a god learning to be human, and I just think he <3

#vio.ask #empiressmp #empires smp #dreamsmp #scott smajor #smajor #smajor1995 #mythicalsausage #mythical sausage #technoblade #to be clear i am not an apologist for any character #i fully realize that they are doing wrong and I like to watch it happen #minecraft roleplay got be in full character analysis mode #long post

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warsofasoiaf · 3 years

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Writing Characters With Believable Military PTSD

I typically write these writing and worldbuilding essays from a dispassionate perspective, offering advice and context to prospective writers from as neutral a point of view as I can manage, with the goal being to present specific pieces of information and broader concepts that can hopefully improve writing and build creators’ confidence to bring their projects to fruition, whether that be writing, tabletop gaming, video game programming, or anything that suits their fancy. While writing this essay though, I struggled to maintain that perspective. Certainly, the importance of the topic to me was a factor, but ultimately, I saw impersonality just as a suboptimal presentation method for something so intensely personal. I do maintain some impartiality particularly in places where historical or academic context is called for, but in other respects I’ve opted for a different approach. Ultimately, this essay is a labor of love for me, love for those who suffer from military PTSD, love for those who love those who suffer from it, and love for writers who want to, in the way that they so choose, help those two other groups out. Thus, this is a different type of essay in certain segments than my usual fare; I hope the essay isn’t an unreadable chimera because of it.

This essay focuses on military-related PTSD. While there are some concepts that translate well into PTSD in the civilian sphere, there are unique elements that do not necessarily fit the mold in both directions, so for someone hoping to write a different form of PTSD, I would recommend finding other resources that could better suit your purposes. I also recommend using more than one source just in general, trauma is personal and so multiple sources can help provide a wide range of experiences to draw upon, which should hopefully improve any creative work.

And as a final introductory note, traumatic experiences are deeply personal. If you are using someone you know as a model for your writing, you owe it to that person to communicate exactly what you are doing and to ask their permission every step of the way. I consider it a request out of politeness to implore any author who uses someone else’s experiences to inform their writing in any capacity, but when it comes to the truly negative experiences in someone’s life, this rises higher from request to demand. You will ask someone before taking a negative experience from their own life and placing it into your creative works, and you will not hide anything about it from them. Receiving it is a great sign of trust. The opposite is a travesty, robbing someone of a piece of themselves and placing it upon display as a grotesque exhibit. And if that sounds ghoulish and macabre, it’s because it is, without hyperbole. Don’t do it.

Why Write PTSD?

What is the purpose of including PTSD in a creative work? There have been plenty of art therapy actions taken by those who suffer PTSD to create something from their condition, which can be as profound for those who do not have it as it is therapeutic for those that do, but why would someone include it in their creative works, and why is some no-name guy on the internet writing an essay offering tips as to how to do it better?

Certainly, one key element is that it’s real, and it happens. If art is to reflect upon reality, PTSD suffered by soldiers is one element of that, so art can reflect it, but what specifically about PTSD, as opposed to any other facet of existence? Author preference certainly plays a factor, but why would someone try to include something that is difficult to understand and difficult to portray? While everyone comes to their own reason, I think that a significant number of people are curious about what exactly goes on in the minds of someone suffering through PTSD, and creative works allow them a way to explore it, much the way fiction can explore scenarios and emotions that are either unlikely or unsafe to explore in reality. If that’s the case, then the purpose of this essay is rather simple, to make the PTSD examination more grounded in reality and thus a better reflection of it. But experiences are unique even if discernable patterns emerge, so in that sense, no essay created by an amateur writer with no psychological experience could be an authoritative take on reality, the nature of which would is far beyond the scope of this essay.

For my own part, I think that well-done creative works involving PTSD is meant to break down the isolation that it can cause in its wake. Veterans suffering may feel that they are alone, that their loved ones cannot understand them and the burden of trying to create that would simply push them away; better instead to have the imperfect bonds that they currently have than risk losing them entirely. For those who are on the outside looking in, isolation lurks there as well, a gulf that seems impossible to breach and possibly intrusive to even try. Creative works that depict PTSD can help create a sense that victims aren’t alone, that there are people that understand and can help without demeaning the sense of self-worth. Of course, another element would be to reduce the amount of poorly-done depictions of PTSD. Some creative works use PTSD as a backstory element, relegating a defining and important element of an individual’s life as an aside, or a minor problem that can be resolved with a good hug and a cry or a few nights with the right person. If a well-done creative work can help create a bridge and break down isolation, a poorly-done one can turn victims off, reinforcing the idea that no one understands and worse, no one cares. For others, it gives a completely altered sense of what PTSD is and what they could do to help, keeping them out, confusing them, or other counter-productive actions. In that sense, all the essay is to help build up those who are doing the heavy lifting. I’m not full of so much hubris as to think this is a profound piece of writing that will help others, but if creators are willing to try and do the hard work of building a bridge, I could at least try to help out and provide a wheelbarrow.

An Abbreviated Look At The Many Faces and Names of PTSD Throughout History

PTSD has been observed repeatedly throughout human history, even when it was poorly understood. This means that explorations of PTSD can be written in settings even if they did not have a distinctly modern understanding of neurology, trauma, or related matters. These historical contexts are also useful for worldbuilding a believable response in fictional settings and scenarios that don’t necessarily have a strict analogue in our own history. By providing this historical context, hopefully I can craft a broad-based sense of believable responses to characters with PTSD at a larger level.

In the time of Rome, it was understood by legionnaires that combat was a difficult endeavor, and so troops were typically on the front lines engaged in combat for short periods of time, to be rotated back for rest while others took their place. It was considered ideal, in these situations, to rotate troops that fought together back so that they could rest together. The immediate lesson is obvious, the Romans believed that it was vital for troops to take time to process what they had done and that was best served with quiet periods of rest not just to allow the adrenaline to dissipate (the "combat high"), but a chance for the mind to wrap itself around what the legionnaire had done. The Romans also recognized that camaraderie between fellow soldiers helped soldiers to cope, and this would be a running theme throughout history (and remains as such today). Soldiers were able to empathize with each other, and help each other through times of difficulty. This was not all sanguine, however, Roman legions depended on their strong formations, and a soldier that did not perform their duty could endanger the unit, and so shame in not fulfilling their duty was another means to keep soldiers in line. The idea of not letting down your fellow soldiers is a persistent refrain in coping with the traumas of war, and throughout history this idea has been used for both pleasant and unpleasant means of keeping soldiers in the fight.

In the Middle Ages, Geoffroi de Charny wrote extensively on the difficulties that knights could experience on the campaign trail in his Book of Chivalry. The book highlights the deprivation that knights suffered, from the bad food and poor sleep to the traumatic experience of combat to being away from family and friends to the loss of valued comrades to combat and infection; each of these is understood as a significant stressor that puts great strain on the mental health of soldiers up to today. De Charny recommended focusing on the knightly oaths of service, the needs of the mission of their liege, and the duty of the knight to serve as methods to help bolster the resolve of struggling knights. The book also mentions seeking counseling and guidance from priests or other confidants to help improve their mental health to see their mission through. This wasn’t universal, however. Some severely traumatized individuals were seen as simple cowards, and punished harshly for their perceived cowardice as antithetical to good virtue and to serve as an example.

World War I saw a sharp rise in the reported incidents of military-related PTSD and new understandings and misunderstandings. The rise in the number of soldiers caused a rise in cases of military PTSD, even though the term itself was not known at the time. Especially in the early phases of the war, many soldiers suffering from PTSD were thought to be malingering, pretending to have symptoms to avoid being sent to the front lines. The term “shell shock” was derived because it was believed that the concussive force of artillery bombardment caused brain damage as it rattled the skull or carbon monoxide fumes would damage the brain as they were inhaled, as a means to explain why soldiers could have physical responses such as slurred speech, lack of response to external stimuli, even nigh-on waking catatonia, despite not being hit by rifle rounds or shrapnel. This would later be replaced by the term “battle fatigue” when it became apparent that artillery bombardment was not a predicative indicator. Particularly as manpower shortages became more prevalent, PTSD-sufferers could be sent to firing squads as a means to cow other troops to not abandon their post. Other less fatal methods of shaming could occur, such as the designation “Lack of Moral Fibre,” an official brand of cowardice, as an attempt to shame the members into remembering their duty. As the war developed, and understanding grew, better methods of treatment were made, with rest and comfort provided to slight cases, strict troop rotations observed to rotate men to and from the front lines, and patients not being told that they were being evacuated for nervous breakdown to avoid cementing that idea in their mind. These lessons would continue into World War II, where the term “combat stress reaction” was adopted. While not always strenuously followed, regular rotations were adopted as standard policy. This was still not universal, plenty of units still relied upon bullying members into maintaining their post despite mental trauma.

The American military promotes a culture of competence and ability, particularly for the enlisted ranks, and that lends itself to the soldier viewing themselves in a starkly different fashion than a civilian. Often, a soldier sees the inability to cope with a traumatic experience as a personal failure stemming from the lack of mental fortitude. Owning up to such a lack of capability is tantamount to accepting that they are an inferior soldier, less capable than their fellows. This idea is commonly discussed, and should not be ignored, but it is far from the only reason. The military also possesses a strong culture of fraternity that obligates “Don’t be a fuckup,” is a powerful motivating force, and it leads plenty of members of the military to ignore traumatic experiences out of the perceived need not to put the burden on their squadmates. While most professional militaries stress that seeking mental health for trauma is not considered a sign of weakness, enlisted know that if they receive mental health counseling, it is entirely likely that someone will have to take their place in the meantime. That could potentially mean that another person, particularly in front-line units, are exposed to danger that they would otherwise not be exposed to, potentially exacerbating guilt if said person gets hurt or killed. This is even true in stateside units, plenty of soldiers don’t report for treatment because it would mean dumping work on their fellows, a negative aspect of unit fraternity. Plenty of veterans also simply never are screened for mental health treatment, and usually this lends to a mentality of “well, no one is asking, so I should be fine.” These taken together combine to a heartbreaking reality, oftentimes a modern veteran that seeks help for mental trauma has often coped silently for years, perhaps self-medicating with alcohol or off-label drug usage, and is typically very far along their own path comparatively. Others simply fall through the cracks, not being screened for mental disorders and so do not believe that anything is wrong; after all, if something was wrong, surely the doctors would notice it, right? The current schedule of deployments, which are duration-based and not mission-based, also make it hard for servicemembers to rationalize their experiences and equate them to the mission; there’s no sense of pairing suffering to objectives the way that de Charnay mentioned could help contextualize the deprivation and loss. These sorts of experiences make the soldier feel adrift, and their suffering pointless, which is discouraging on another level. It is one thing to suffer for a cause, it’s another not to know why, amplifying the feelings of powerlessness and furthering the isolation that they feel.

Pen to Page - The Characters and Their Responses

The presentation of PTSD within a character will depend largely on the point-of-view that the author creates. A character that suffers from PTSD depending on the presence of an internal or external point-of-view, will be vastly different experiences on page. Knowing this is essential, as this will determine how the story itself is presenting the disorder. Neither is necessarily more preferable than the other, and is largely a matter of the type of story being told and the personal preference of the author.

Internal perspectives will follow the character’s response from triggering event to immediate response. This allows the author to present a glimpse into what the character is experiencing. In these circumstances, remember that traumatic flashbacks are merely one of many experiences that an average sufferer of PTSD can endure. In a visual medium, flashbacks are time-effective methods to portray a character reliving portions of a traumatic experience, but other forms of media can have other tools. Traumatic flashbacks are not necessarily a direct reliving of an event from start to finish, individuals may instead feel sudden sharp pains of old injuries, be overwhelmed by still images of traumatic scenes or loud traumatic sounds. These can be linked to triggers that bring up the traumatic incident, such as a similar sight, sound, or smell. These moments of linkage are not necessarily experienced linearly or provide a clear sequence of events from start to finish (memory rarely is unless specifically prompted), and it may be to the author’s advantage to not portray them as such in order to communicate the difficulty in mental parsing that the character may be experiencing. Others might be more intrusive, such as violently deranged nightmares that prevent sleep. The author must try to strike a balance between portraying the experience realistically and portraying it logically that audience members can understand. The important thing about these memories is that they are intrusive, unwelcome, and quite stressful, so using techniques that jar the reader, such as the sudden intrusive image of a torn body, a burning vehicle, or another piece of the traumatic incident helps communicate the disorientation. Don't rely simply on shock therapy, it's not enough just to put viscera on the page. Once it is there, the next steps, how the character reacts, is crucial to a believable response.

When the character experiences something that triggers their PTSD, start to describe the stress response, begin rapidly shortening the sentences to simulate the synaptic activity, express the fight-flight-freeze response as the character reacts, using the tools of dramatic action to heighten tension and portraying the experience as something frightful and distinctly undesirable. The triggering incident brings back the fear, such as a pile of rubble on the side of the road being a potential IED location, or a loud firework recalling the initial moments of an enemy ambush. The trauma intrudes, and the character falls deep into the stress response, and now they react. How does this character react? By taking cover? By attacking the aggressor who so reminds them of the face of their enemy? Once the initial event starts, then the character continues to respond. Do they try to get to safety? Secure the area and eliminate the enemy? Eventually, the character likely recognizes their response is inappropriate. It wasn’t a gunshot, it was a car backfiring, the smell of copper isn’t the sight of a blown-apart comrade and the rank odor of blood, it’s just a jug of musty pennies. This fear will lead to control mechanisms where the victim realizes that their response is irrational. Frequently, the fear is still there, and it still struggles with control. This could heighten a feeling a powerlessness in the character as they try and fail to put the fear under control: "Yes, I know this isn’t real and there’s nothing to be afraid of, but I’m still shaking and I am still afraid!" It’s a horrifying logical track, a fear that the victim isn’t even in control of their thoughts - the one place that they should have control - and that they might always be this way. There’s no safety since even their thoughts aren’t safe. Despair might also follow, as the victim frantically asserts to regain control. Usually with time, the fear starts to lessen as the logical centers of the brain regain control, and the fear diminishes. Some times, the victim can't even really recall the exact crippling sense of fear when attempting to recall it, only that they were afraid and that it was deeply scary and awful, but the notion that it happened remains in their mind.

Control mechanisms are also important to developing a believable PTSD victim. Most sufferers dread the PTSD response and so actively avoid objects or situations that could potentially trigger. Someone who may have had to escape from a helicopter falling into the ocean may not like to be immersed in water. Someone who was hit by a hidden IED may swerve to avoid suspicious piles in the road. Someone buried under a collapsing ceiling may become claustrophobic. Thus, many characters with PTSD will be hypervigilant almost to the point of exhaustion, avoiding setting off the undesired response. This hypervigilance is mentally taxing; the character begins to become sluggish mentally as all their energy is squeezed out, leaving them struggling for even the simplest of rational thoughts. This mental fog can be translated onto the page in dramatic effect by adding paragraph length to even simple actions, bringing the reader along into the fog, laboriously seeing the character move to perform simple actions. Then, mix in a loss of a sense of purpose. They’re adrift, not exactly sure what they’re doing and barely aware of what’s happening, although they are thinking and functioning. In the character’s daily life, they are living their life using maximum effort to avoid triggering responses; this is another aspect of control that the character can use as an attempt to claw back some semblance of power in their own lives. Even control methods that aren’t necessarily healthy such as drinking themselves to pass out every night or abusing sleeping pills in an attempt to sleep due to their nightmares, are ways to attempt to regain a sense of normalcy and function. Don’t condescend to these characters and make them pathetic, that’s just another layer of cruelty, but showing the unhealthy coping mechanisms can demonstrate the difficulty that PTSD victims are feeling. Combined with an external perspective, the author can show the damage that these unhealthy actions are doing without casting the character as weak for not taking a different path.

External perspectives focus on the other characters and how they observe and react to the individual in question. Since the internal thought process of the character is not known, sudden reactions to an unknown trigger can be quite jarring for characters unaware, which can mirror real-life experiences that individuals can have with PTSD-sufferers. In these types of stories, the character’s reaction to the victim is paramount. PTSD in real life often evokes feelings of helplessness in loved ones when they simply cannot act to help, can evoke confusion, or anger and resentment. These reactions are powerful emotions with the ability to drive character work, and so external perspectives can be useful for telling a story about what it is like for loved ones who suffer in their own fashion. External perspectives can be used not just in describing triggering episodes, but in exploring how the character established coping mechanisms and how their loved ones react to them. Some mechanisms are distinctly unhealthy, such as alcohol or prescription drug abuse, complete withdrawal, or a refusal to drive vehicles, and these create stress and a feeling of helplessness in characters or can impel them to try and take action. Others can be healthy, and a moment of inspiration and joy for an external perspective could be sharing in that mechanism, demonstrating empathy and understanding which evokes strong pathos, and hopefully to friends of those who suffer from PTSD, a feeling that they too, are not alone.

As the character progresses, successes and failures can often be one of the most realistic and most important things to include within the work, since those consumers who have PTSD will see parts of themselves in the characters, which can build empathy and cut down on the feelings of isolation that many victims of PTSD feel. A character could, over the course of the story, begin weaning themselves off of their control mechanisms, have the feelings of panic subside as their logical sides more quickly assert control, replace unhealthy coping mechanisms with healthier ones, or other elements of character progression and growth. Contrarily, a character making progress could, after experiencing significant but unrelated stressors, backslide either into unhealthy coping mechanisms or be blindsided by another attack. This is a powerful fear for the victim, since it can cause them to think ‘all my progress, all my effort, and I am not free!’ This is often a great fear for PTSD users (people with depression often have the same feeling) that find methods of coping are no longer as effective, and the struggle is perceived as one that they’re ultimately doomed to failure. This feeling of inevitable failure can lead to self-harm and suicide as their avenue of success seems to burn to ash right as it was in their hands. More than one soldier suffering from PTSD has ended up concluding: “Fuck it, I can’t live like this,” as horrible as that is. Don’t be afraid to include setbacks and backsliding, those happen in reality, and can be one of the most isolating fears in their lives; if the goal of portraying PTSD accurately is to help remove that feeling of isolation, then content creators must not avoid these experiences. Success as well as failure are essential to PTSD in characters in stories, these elements moreso than any other, I believe, will transcend the medium and form a connection, fulfilling the objective we set out to include in the beginning paragraphs.

Coming Back to the Beginning

It might be counterintuitive at first glance to say “including military PTSD will probably mean it will be a long journey full of discouraging story beats that might make readers depressed,” because that’s definitely going to discourage some readers to do that. I don’t see it that way, though. The people that want to do it should go in knowing it’s going to be hard, and let that strengthen their resolve, and put the best creation they can forward. The opposite is also true. Not every prospective author has to want to include any number of difficult subjects in their works, and that’s perfectly fine. Content creators must be free to shape the craft that they so desire without the need to be obligated to tackle every difficult issue, and so no content creator should be thought of as lesser or inferior because they opt not to include it in their works. I think that’s honestly stronger than handling an important topic poorly, or even worse, frivolously. Neither should anyone think that a content creator not including PTSD in their works means that they don’t care about those who suffer from it or for those who care about them or who simply don’t care about the subject in general. That’s just a terrible way to treat someone, and in the end, this entire excursion was about the opposite

Ultimately, this essay is a chance not only to help improve creative works involving PTSD, but to reflect on the creative process. Those who still want to proceed, by all means, do so. Hopefully this essay will help you create something that can reach someone. If every piece of work that helps portray PTSD can reach someone somewhere and make things easier, even if ever so little, well then, that’s what it’s really all about.

Hoping everyone has a peaceful Memorial Day. Be good to each to other.

SLAL

#essays on writing and worldbuilding #ptsd

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interact-if · 3 years

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Day 5 of A/PI Heritage Month featured authors interview! The lovely Parker, everyone!

Parkerlyn, author of The Nameless

A/PI Heritage Month Featured Author

Legend goes when the world was formed, the mortal races, mortalis, were created with the gift of magic. But as time passed their hubris grew, and the sheevra were created to curb their pride.

When it comes to these chaotic and malevolent beings, the lands are full of cautionary tales. Though some would tell you that the stories are just that. To them, names have no power. There are no mysterious deals to fear, and the figure who seduces you into an alley at midnight is certainly no malicious spirit.

Which luckily for you means easy prey.

Author's Ko-fi | Discord

(INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT UNDER THE INTERVIEW!)

Q1: First of all, introduce us to your project! What is it about?

The Nameless is a mishmash of fey stories and a... teetering on apocalyptic setting? The world itself is almost completely covered by desert save for four regions and cities that have maintained life around them. The origins of that desert, the Arids, are said to have been from wars thousands of years ago where there was too much magic siphoned from the world, and the cost was desolation.

The reader enters the story as a sheevra (the fey-based race) who's been taught that all this was the mortal race’s doing in their desire for power. And that the sheevra were created to take that energy back from them via deals and names to slowly restore the world's more verdant state.

If you asked the mortalis though, they'd sing a different tune. To them, the sheevra are the remnants of the entity mainly responsible for the state of the Arids, and they're the reason why the world is stuck like it is.

Where does the truth actually fall? Well…

The game itself kicks off when one of the four sheevra clans in the world goes missing, and you're sent to investigate what happened. Though whether or not you really want to find out remains to be seen.

Q2: If it’s not too spoilery, what are you most excited about your project?

I'm definitely buzzing over some of the reveals behind the Arids and other features of the world, and how things are tied together. The puzzle will start getting filled in towards the end of Book 1 and will culminate in the final major choice of the entire story, and I'm really excited to see how people handle it.

I'm also looking forward to exploring more of the backstories of the romances and various characters, and also for more descriptions of magic-tech and how that's integrated into each of the cities (had a BLAST with this in upcoming content). Just in general, excited to continue bringing the world to life!

Q3: What inspired the current project you’re working on?

The Nameless was initially sparked by a D&D NPC, Oisein's predecessor who was far more bitter and not quite the sarcastic chaos gremlin they are today.

Specifically from Kobold Press' Courts of the Shadow Fey, this NPC was supposed to be just a one sentence rumor. But (of course) my players decided to pursue that route more in depth. Said character that I made up on the spot then ended up being a regular that I eventually made into a PC for another campaign. And...things sort of spiraled and transformed from there as I created their backstory and fell in love with the characters who would then become the four romances of the game.

There's also a theme I've been wanting to write about for a long time which might lend itself to spoilers, that I was finally able to find a home for in the world of The Nameless. So it's a dash of old and new ideas!

Q4: Do you pull from your own identity for inspiration? How has that been reflected in your work?

There's some indulgent, more obvious ones like the city of Han, which is directly named after the Han River in Korea and is, well, the City of Rivers. There's also small references to Korean folklore within the sheevra that will probably continue to show up, and you better believe Korean inspired food and clothing will make an appearance haha.

But below the surface level, I think a lot of the mannerisms and backstories of the characters may unconsciously be affected by my identity. Until someone asked me about modern ethnicities for the love interests, I didn't realize how much I had tied my mixed culture into these characters. But I'm happy to have that little piece intertwined in their personalities, their values, and their attitudes, as a small nod to my own Korean-American background.

This will probably become more evident in the settings too. There's a lot of mixed inspirations and sources in the architecture, environment, and culture of each city that I'm looking forward to expanding on.

So yeah, it's kind of funny to see that manifest in my writing, but hopefully it helps to build up an interesting and unique environment for readers to immerse themselves in!

Q5: What’s been your experience so far? With writing, with the if community...

For writing in general, this is by far the largest project I've ever taken on, and there was and is a learning curve when adjusting for interactive fiction. But I've enjoyed the freedom and variation I've been able to build into this story with this medium, and think it continues to take shape in ways I never initially planned but love to see!

For the IF community, it's definitely been positive! I kind of just chucked this story out there not expecting much from it and figured it would be hard for anyone else to get into. Honestly I thought that maybe just a few people would see it, but that it would mostly be self indulgent.

But the support from other writers and readers and the questions I've received has just been amazing, and I’m glad I dived deeper into the IF community. Especially when the self-doubt inevitably creeps in and you have those moments of "oof this is terrible". The positive words and encouragement mean so much, and I don't think I'll ever be able to express how much it helps. I'm also really happy to have found an overall inclusive community, and hope I can extend that space into this game!

Also the stories and games out there? Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping, spectac-

Q6: Do you have any future projects in the works?

None at the moment, my focus is mainly on writing The Nameless and continuing to develop features for the Twine version!

Q7: Finally, what piece of advice would you give to fellow authors?

Don't let yourself get down by comparisons. It's easy to slip into, and I'm definitely guilty of it too! But no one's going to tell your story like you can and the way you want it, so it's up to you to share that with the world!

#if: events #Happy Asian and Pacific Islander month!!#Asian/pacific islander month 2021 #a/pi month #a/pi month 2021 #aapiheritagemonth #aapi month #interactive fiction #authors of color

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bitch-for-a-rainbow · 3 years

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Lex Luthor: I actually really like him and Supergirl made me mad

So, Lex Luthor is a very interesting, sometimes thought provoking, but most of all very enjoyable character.

Lex is many things, a classic egomaniacal villain, an example of what lies can do to a relationship, a walking, talking red flag, a warning of how hubris and jealously can destroy you, and much, much more. He is not the typical strain of insane— if crazy at all, highly competent, and best of all knows every one of Superman’s buttons and exactly how to press them.

I love watching Lex in every media I’ve ever seen him in going back to the original Christopher Reeve Superman. Every media, that is, except Supergirl. Why?

Because she isn’t fucking Superman.

Obviously, I love Supergirl— I run a blog with her in my icon— but there are certain things she is not and was never meant to be. Nemesis to Lex Luthor is right up there with a mass-murdering nazi (which is why the multiverse exists-- so that you can make her the first super on earth, Lex Luthor’s ex-friend, and not completely ignore the foundation of who they are as characters)

Lex is fun because he’s so smart, but also because of the personal stake he has with Superman. Lex felt jealous. In many cases, he felt betrayed. He let that fester into mania and then he built an evil radioactive robo-suit and committed mass murder. You know, like reasonable people do.

Lex was Superman’s friend and that gives his hatred of Kryptonians not only purpose, but emotional weight. Their relationship has that itching tension of painful history. In addition, Lex is extremely prideful. To him, Supergirl would be second class, she’s backup. And there is a story there: a story when Lex has a breakdown when backup knocks him into the sun, or the (in my opinion, less entertaining) version where Superman shows up to save her, reaffirming Lex’s worldview that he’s everything and defeating Superman means that Lex is the greatest and smartest, and even more stories beyond those that still adhere to its core principles— Kara and Lex as characters.

But Supergirl chose neither. Instead they chose another recycle Superman plot. And then another. And another.

I should make time to say that I like Jon Cryer; I think he’s doing a great job with what he’s been given. He’s got the charisma. He’s got the smarmy self-congratulating swagger down perfectly. The scenes where the real Lex pokes its ugly head through his facade are just great. I think in anything else he would have made an excellent Lex Luthor, but not here.

I was… disappointed with season 4. I liked 4x20– Kara and Lena investigating was fun at worst and at best had some really good edge of my seat moments. I thought that 4x16 “The House of L” was one of the best episodes of supergirl in a very long time and it still holds its place at least in my top 10, probably my top 5. But you will notice Lex wasn’t even in 4x20 and his places in 4x16 I actually enjoyed could easily have been occupied by any other intelligent villainous character. From a very basic point of view Col. Haley would have fit the mold of the manipulator training the compassionate but confused alien to kill— Wouldn’t have been her first time.

The later usages of Lex in Supergirl are also attempting a common Superman plot. Lex “redeems” himself, tricks the public into trusting him again by framing Superman for something, and eventually is once again revealed to be evil. It sounds like a repetitive, boring plot that would lose the audience suspension if belief after a few tries— “Seriously, this again. How are they not expecting this by now?” And that complaint works for Supergirl. Because Supergirl isn’t Superman.

Clark Kent was Lex Luthor’s best friend. Clark Kent ignored every warning sign and red flag waved in his face because Lex Luthor was his best friend. Clark Kent harbors a deep, abiding hurt and resentment from Lex’s betrayal. He has no trust for Lex, just like any hero would, but he also has the built up anger from repeated clashes with Lex and the initial betrayal. So when Lex returns, once again proclaiming he’s changed his ways, Superman’s response is a very public, very obviously bitter “yeah, right.” When Lex lays one of his traps for Superman, Clark is a little too rash. Lex Luthor knows how to push all of Clark’s buttons, even if he doesn’t know that they’re Clark’s. Lex can play him like a fiddle, and as for the general populace— would you be so steadfast in your trust of the invulnerable alien that could laser you in half in the blink of an eye and seems to be getting a little too comfortable in his role as peacekeeper? Would you, when even the slightest chance could slaughter your entire planet and you would have nothing and no one would could stop him— except, of course, Lex Luthor?

We’ve been shown through many media that when Lex can’t manipulate his opponent, when villain comes that is simply too big for him to work on, he is at incredible risk. There are several stories I can think of of the top of my head where Lex becomes a temporary ally of the heroes simply because he realizes he can’t manipulate this new, powerful player and that therefore they are a risk to him (I actually really like those stories because the dynamics between him and the heroes are incredibly fun and interesting— you start to get an idea of who Lex is underneath all of the wit and ego).

This is Supergirl’s great failure with Lex. The show understands that he is a genius— makes a great fuss about it. They understand that he is a manipulator— it’s his entire plot line with Lena. But they fail to understand that Lex’s ploys don’t work because he’s just so smart like the smartest ever. They work because he knows Superman and he knows that people are afraid of him— even the ones who trust and love him live with the knowledge that if he gets mind controlled or goes crazy, he could kill them all with ease, and that it’s happened before.

Supergirl wasn’t around for Lex’s turn. This Supergirl wasn’t even in that steady of contact with Clark. She has no stinging betrayal, no anger and bitter history to make her rash and predictable. Certainly by now, two seasons into Lex’s placement in the show, she is angry— but by all the evidence we’ve been given, Kara’s anger just makes her more volatile, unpredictable and sometimes genuinely down for murder, which is definitely not something Lex needs. We have seen her both let Lex “fall to his death” (when she wasn’t all that angry— she just accepted his suicide without trying to force him into prison) and nearly shoot him with laser vision (this time she was angry and emotionally unstable after the death of Argo and the more Lex centered anger that he revealed her identity and destroyed her relationship with Lena. There is no question that she would have killed-- or at the very least maimed-- him if The Monitor hadn’t intervened). If Superman just murdered Lex when he got angry, he would have died a dozen times over.

Lex doesn’t even have a basic understanding of Kara’s mindset. He can’t. Superman was raised by American humans in Kansas— he has a worldview that Lex could easily pick up on because it is at least based on watching most of the same events unfold as they grew up— and that’s if they had never met before they started fighting. Sure, he could assume Superman had some quirks from being an alien, but the base Americanized cultural standpoint was already affecting Lex’s machinations because he was an American. He’s familiar with the culture and values Superman follows— not so with Kara. I don’t even know if it was possible for him to obtain information on her religion, let alone the cultural views on justice. His research on her past fights would have been choppy at best, given that there are so many things that only Kara or the other Superfriends were there for. He can’t have the information about that fight on Mars where Kara literally disintegrated at least 3 white martians. He can’t know what happened with Reign beyond “she’s not going to be a problem anymore”. He might have more information about the Daxamite invasion through government records and his mother but the information is still limited. As for Non and Myriad, we don’t even know what happened to Non, and did they report to the DEO that J’onn literally tore Indigo in half (very graphically I might add). Or did they just say “They won’t be a problem anymore.” Lex may have been spying on Kara since Season 2, but how much is watching her civilian life going to help him understand her, when Kara’s civilian life was constructed to hide? Kara Danvers doesn’t say a lot of what she thinks to avoid notice, and even Supergirl keeps her mouth shut a lot of the time to try and maintain human-alien relations. The episodes where she squabbles with the Col. Haley and President Baker are full of her smiling and gritting her teeth through statements that clearly make her very angry.

Lex “falling to his death” and then getting shot at the end of season 4 was a great moment— it fit with the characters motivations, but it also unfortunately illustrated the problem with Supergirl characters interacting with Lex. J’onn was a soldier who kills people. Kara has killed people. Alex has killed people. This scene was not the first time we watched Lena try to murder someone with that gun. They are not restricted by the moral code Superman uses, which makes it both more difficult and more dangerous for Lex to try manipulating them— so he doesn’t and instead they skip the intermediary and rely wholly on him being able to manipulate the public. This works to an extent with Red Daughter, but only because anti-alien sentiment was at an all time high with the Children of Liberty, and because Lex lucked into an amnesiac supergirl clone. So little of the heavy lifting was actually done by Lex it feels less like his accomplishment and more like he cheated off of 3 different people and then bragged about his math skills. I said it before and I’ll say it again. The season 4 villain could have been anyone with moderate intelligence and resources. After crisis, the excuses just get weaker and weaker. I mean come on, he confessed to trying to mind control the whole world in front of the jury while screaming vile things at his sister who’s sitting there visibly flinching at his words and they unanimously voted not-guilty? Are you kidding? (Also after watching all the courtroom scenes in Supergirl... do they know how courtrooms work? I mean, I laughed as hard as anyone at the “I plead the 5th” line, but seriously. Do they?)

And Crisis was… a choice. I personally hated that they brought Lex back to life— more so because the in-universe reasoning was so weak. Lex Luthor does not face a whole lot of consequences, it’s true, but that’s because he has the genius, guile, and money to avoid them. To give him such an unearned out— especially after all the damage he’d done by dying— really hurt the both the stakes and the character. Lex is a human, and he fights Superman by taking advantage of very human things: corruption, anger, and fear as well as ingenuity and resourcefulness. He loads the deck in his favor— he doesn’t win on luck. And Lex in the CW Supergirl, seems to only win on luck. First he finds Red Daughter right when anti-alien sentiment is blowing up, then he is resurrected, then he finds out the crisis world loves him. He has had exactly 1 major victory based on his own work— manipulating Brainy. A manipulation which was really hard to believe when Brainy was, in canon, much, much smarter than Lex, familiar with his tactics, lying to the superfriends for no reason, and had no emotional reaction to cloud his judgement.

And even so, this one plot line was one of the more interesting ones in season 5 and the most Lex Luthor-like plot line the show has had. Even when I felt my suspension of disbelief slipping, it wasn’t entirely in tatters. Lex’s win felt somewhat earned.

He has been in the show for 2 1/2 seasons and he has had 1 major victory that felt at all earned. 2 and 1/2 seasons. That’s currently around 45% of the show’s run time.

All in all, we have 4 deeply related problems that plague the CW Supergirl Lex Luthor:

Lex Luthor’s plans rely as much on effective manipulation of Superman as they do on his own genius. Without that manipulation, his victories rely much more on happenstance and luck, making them feel less earned.

Lex Luthor cannot effectively manipulate Supergirl— at the very least, not in the beginning of their relationship, which CW Supergirl focuses on— nor does he try to manipulate her or much of the cast beyond Lena and once with Brainy.

Supergirl kills people. Supergirl has killed Lex. Superman doesn’t kill people.

Lex fighting Supergirl does not have the kind of inherent emotional weight that Lex fighting Superman does.

There are some other issues I have with the CW supergirl version of Lex, but I think if it was a Superman show I wouldn’t have minded. The large amount of screen time dedicated to him would make sense there, and the fact that he’s a cockroach seemingly impervious to any plot consequences would also fit more in line with Superman’s increasing frustration and make his manipulations more effective.

The only problem I have that wouldn’t been solved purely by making it about Superman is the crowding problem. In season 1, Non and the DEO were highly connected and fed each other as villains. Season 2 also fit that same block of alien vs. anti alien. Both of those secondary villains (the army/DEO in s1 and Cadmus in s2) were very much not as big a villain as the main. Season 3 sort of had a secondary villain with Morgan Edge, but he was mostly just a Lena problem. All of these seasons had a good balance between the villains screen time and also between the villains and heroes. It got a little more complicated with the extra world killers in s3, but still functioned fairly smoothly with focus on Reign. This is one of the main reasons that seasons 1 and 3 are my favorites. S4, however, got more cluttered. A lot more cluttered. Manchester Black, the Children of Liberty, Lex Luthor, Red Daughter, and Eve Tessmacher were all villains with multi-episode arcs handled directly by Supergirl herself. There was too much to cover, not enough connection, and not enough time— plus 2 new main cast members (Look, I love Nia and Brainy but that season had way too much going on). Season 5 had Leviathan, Lena Luthor, Lex Luthor and 2 new mains. Each of those villain arcs had their own distinct plot from one another and screen time started to become more choppy and spread out. Season 6 now has so far Lex Luthor, the phantom zone, and Nyxly, as well as the Zor-El mini-arc, and while I’ll give them some leeway for Melissa Beniost’s maternity leave, there is again too much in too little time. Villains are underdeveloped or not given weighty closures, each main gets less and less personal screentime, and every shot that doesn’t serve a good or entertaining purpose feels like pouring out water from a canteen in the desert, especially now in the last season. Lex has greatly suffered for this both in the rage at how much screen time he gets compared to other characters, Kara in particular, and because of how his arcs are still hobbled by the lack of it.

I just find myself wishing they’d restricted Lex to a 3 or 4 episode mini-arc, or just season 4 and saved him for the Superman and Lois show. They could have played the crisis resurrection as just an unfortunate coincidence of fate and had it be Superman’s problem from there on.

To Jon Cryer, may you never see this. It’s so very not your fault.

If anyone actually reads this whole thing and I got something wrong let me know. I’d love to discuss it. Today, I’m just trying to isolate the main issues I have with Lex in Supergirl.

#i spent way too long on this #And I'm pretty sure I still have typos and fragmented sentences #but im not spending another minute editing #so here you go #Supergirl #Lex Luthor

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