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haplogamingchef · 16 days ago
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Dune Awakening Class Guide: Swordmaster to Smuggler
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Introduction: Picking the Right Class in Dune Awakening
Starting your journey in Dune Awakening means choosing a class that matches your style of play. Unlike other MMOs, the class you select here shapes more than just combat—it defines how you survive, fight, and grow in the harsh desert of Arrakis. This guide covers all five classes, their strengths, signature skills, and the type of players they suit best. And yes, while you can switch classes later on, your first choice will still define your early-game experience.
Swordmaster: Melee Expert and Frontline Leader
If close-range combat and fast-paced action sound like your thing, the Swordmaster might be your best bet. Trained in precision and agility, Swordmasters rely on skillful timing and quick reflexes instead of brute force or tech.
Starting Ability: Deflection – lets you block incoming projectiles and counter with a swift strike.
Playstyle: Great for aggressive players who love diving into battles and outmaneuvering enemies with fast dodges.
Strengths: High damage, fast mobility, excellent for solo and frontline play.
Advanced Skills: Unlock stamina-based combos, movement boosts, and elemental melee techniques later in the game.
Recommended for: Players who want fast, fluid combat and don’t mind a bit of a learning curve.
Bene Gesserit: Tactical Manipulator with Mind-Control Skills
The Bene Gesserit class is all about psychological warfare and subtle influence. These aren’t brawlers, but they can absolutely control the flow of a fight.
Starting Ability: Voice Compel – forces enemies to follow your verbal commands, like walking out of cover or into danger.
Playstyle: Ideal for those who prefer tactics and control over brute strength.
Strengths: Unique mind-control mechanics, great dodging, and excellent in duels or missions involving deception.
Advanced Skills: Unlock enhanced recognition, advanced dodges, and environmental resistances.
Recommended for: Players who enjoy manipulation, stealthy gameplay, and outsmarting their opponents.
Mentat: The Strategic Genius and Battlefield Support
Mentats are the brains of the battlefield. They process info faster than most computers and play more of a support or tactical role.
Starting Ability: Mark Weakness – highlights enemy vulnerabilities so they take more damage from all sources.
Playstyle: Support-focused but not helpless. These are the players who always know what’s coming next.
Strengths: Battlefield scanning, drone deployment, enemy tracking, and environmental prediction.
Advanced Skills: Tech-based support, hacking, surveillance, and even weather forecasting.
Recommended for: Strategic players who love planning ahead, analyzing combat, and giving their team the edge.
Fremen Survivalist: The Master of the Desert
For players who love exploration and survival, the Fremen Survivalist is unmatched. These desert dwellers are tuned into the terrain and thrive where others struggle.
Starting Ability: Sand Walk – lets you move quietly across the desert without drawing sandworms.
Playstyle: Balanced between survival, mobility, and long-range ambush tactics.
Strengths: Heat resistance, environmental adaptation, and terrain-based combat tricks.
Advanced Skills: Trap setting, desert creature summoning, terrain camouflage.
Recommended for: Players focused on open-world exploration, gathering, and living off the land.
Smuggler: The Independent All-Rounder
If freedom is what you’re after, the Smuggler lets you play your own way. They’re not tied to factions and offer a mix of stealth, ranged combat, and economic advantage.
Starting Ability: Smoke Screen – deploys cover that breaks line-of-sight for sneaky escapes or ambushes.
Playstyle: Flexible. Smugglers are ideal for solo play, trade, stealth, or sabotage.
Strengths: Trade routes, rare blueprints, black market access, and trap-based skills.
Advanced Skills: Black market dealings, vehicle mods, contraband runs, and infiltration.
Recommended for: Players who like sandbox freedom, want to profit from gameplay, or enjoy operating outside the rules.
Quick Comparison of All Dune Awakening Classes
ClassFocusIdeal ForStarting SkillSwordmasterMelee, AgilityHigh-damage combatDeflectionBene GesseritControl, ManipulationTactical and stealthy gameplayVoice CompelMentatStrategy, Team SupportPlayers who like planningMark WeaknessFremen SurvivalistExploration, SurvivalDesert navigation & resource useSand WalkSmugglerVersatility, TradeSolo or stealth-based playersSmoke Screen
Which Class Should You Choose First?
While you can eventually switch classes in Dune Awakening, your first pick really matters during early gameplay. Here's a cheat sheet to help:
Pick Swordmaster if you want to jump into the action and lead fights.
Choose Bene Gesserit if you prefer clever play and manipulating outcomes.
Go Mentat for support and battlefield control roles.
Try Fremen Survivalist if exploring and surviving in harsh zones appeals to you.
Select Smuggler for freedom, trade, and stealth-based versatility.
And yes—hybrid builds are possible later on. Mix and match skills from different paths to create your own playstyle. For example, a Swordmaster with desert movement from the Fremen path, or a Bene Gesserit who dabbles in smuggling tech.
Conclusion: Shape Your Destiny in Dune Awakening
The class system in Dune Awakening offers flexibility and depth. Whether you want to brawl on the frontlines, outwit your enemies, dominate the economy, or simply survive the sands, there’s a class that fits. Don’t stress too much—your starting class is just the beginning. The world of Arrakis rewards creativity and exploration, so dive in and start experimenting.
FAQs
Q1: Can you change your class in Dune Awakening? Yes, while your initial class affects early gameplay, you can switch classes later in the game by learning from mentors.
Q2: What is the best solo class in Dune Awakening? The Smuggler is ideal for solo players due to its stealth abilities, economic perks, and independent playstyle.
Q3: Which class is best for beginners? The Swordmaster is beginner-friendly if you enjoy direct combat. Its simple but rewarding melee mechanics are easy to pick up.
Q4: Are hybrid class builds possible? Yes, Dune Awakening allows players to mix abilities from multiple classes as they progress, creating flexible hybrid builds.
Q5: Do classes affect exploration in Dune Awakening? Yes. For example, the Fremen Survivalist excels in exploration due to terrain skills and resistance to desert hazards.
Q6: What class is best for PvP? Swordmasters and Bene Gesserits both shine in PvP—Swordmasters for raw power, Bene Gesserits for manipulation and control.
Q7: Are there crafting-focused classes? Yes. Smugglers and Mentats offer access to advanced crafting, trade routes, and tech-based tools that enhance economic gameplay.
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solxamber · 3 months ago
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Guide Rank: Overwhelmed || Malleus Draconia
Being a high-ranked guide is tough—you’re basically a glorified babysitter for overpowered, emotionally constipated espers. But it gets harder when Malleus Draconia, the strongest esper in existence, asks you to guide him. And somehow, despite it all, you’re pretty sure Malleus is the best thing that’s ever happened to you. Or: Guideverse au!
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The world is a nightmare. It used to be bad enough with things like taxes, slow WiFi, and that one sock disappearing in the wash. But now? Now you have random cosmic hellmouths opening up and vomiting out monsters that think humans are snack-sized protein bars.
They call them Gates. They pop up out of nowhere like your intrusive thoughts at 3 AM, and if no one deals with them, entire cities get turned into discount horror movie scenes.
The only reason people aren't living in a monster apocalypse is because of Espers—overpowered individuals who fight these creatures with sheer force, wild abilities, and a complete disregard for their own safety.
But there’s a tiny problem. Espers have the durability of a wet paper bag. They burn through their energy, go berserk, or outright implode if left alone for too long.
And that’s where Guides come in. Guides stabilize Espers, keep them from disintegrating mid-fight, and prevent them from making headlines as "Local Hero Explodes on Live TV."
And you? Congratulations! You are an SS-Class Guide, one of the absolute best. This should mean power, prestige, and maybe even free drinks. Instead, it means you are a walking, talking, highly sought-after life support machine, and every Esper on the planet wants a piece of you.
And not in a fun way.
You’ve spent your entire career dodging unhinged, desperate, overpowered individuals who think "force-bonding" is a reasonable dating strategy.
Some try to flirt their way into your schedule (bad idea). Some try to bribe you with things like gold, private yachts, and one guy who straight-up offered you a castle. And then there are the truly feral ones, who don’t understand the word “no” and think "What if I just grabbed them?" is a valid problem-solving technique.
One time, an S-Class Esper sent you 72 marriage proposals in a single day. Another time, a different one broke into your apartment and left a PowerPoint presentation on why you should bond with them. With transitions.
If you had a nickel for every time you had to physically dodge an Esper trying to latch onto you like a clingy octopus, you wouldn’t need this job anymore. You could retire to a nice, peaceful life in the mountains, away from all of this nonsense.
But no. You’re still here. Still dodging Espers who treat you like a Black Friday deal at 90% off.
Something has to change.
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It’s another day at work. Another day of wading through a swamp of increasingly deranged requests for guiding, because apparently, every high-ranking Esper on the planet thinks you’re the Holy Grail of Stability™.
You take a deep breath, open your inbox, and immediately regret your life choices.
Request #1:
"O Supreme and Benevolent Guide, I have compiled a PowerPoint titled ‘Why You Should Guide Me and Not Those Other Losers.’ Please see attached. I am very persuasive. Also, I have snacks. Just saying."
Attached: A 657-slide PowerPoint presentation with bullet points like “I Only Go Almost Berserk Like Every Other Tuesday” and “Look At This Dog I Found, Do You Like Him?”
Request #2:
"Greatest and Most Esteemed Guide, I humbly request your guidance. I will literally pay you in gold. Actual, real gold. Or cash. Or—listen, name your price. My mental stability is at stake here. I am ONE bad day away from levitating into the stratosphere and exploding like a firework. PLEASE. I am BEGGING you. Sincerely, your most devoted, desperate, and slightly deranged fan."
Attached: A poorly photoshopped picture of you both standing in front of a sunset. You’ve never met this person in your life.
Request #3:
"GOD-TIER GUIDE, PLEASE, I WILL DO ANYTHING. I WILL FETCH YOUR GROCERIES. I WILL WALK YOUR PET. YOU DON’T HAVE A PET? I WILL GET YOU A PET. I WILL BECOME YOUR PET. PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, JUST GIVE ME 10 MINUTES OF YOUR TIME. MY LAST GUIDE QUIT ON ME AND MOVED TO AN UNDISCLOSED LOCATION. I AM VERY STABLE. PLEASE."
Attached: A video of the sender crushing a monster’s skull with their bare hands while sobbing.
You pinch the bridge of your nose.
This is your life now.
And then—you see it.
A request.
A normal request.
No groveling. No bribery. No half-deranged monologue about why their existence is crumbling without you.
Just a plain, simple request for a guiding session. No attachments. No drama.
You do not even look at the name or the rank.
You just slam the approve button so hard your screen nearly cracks.
And you schedule them for today.
Whatever poor, normal, well-adjusted Esper just sent that request? You’re about to meet your new favorite person.
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You hear a knock on your office door and, without looking up from your third coffee of the afternoon, you say, "Come in." You assume it's just another esper with an unhinged request or a government official trying to bribe you into a permanent bond arrangement (as if free coffee is enough to make up for dealing with an unstable murder machine forever).
But when you finally glance up, you’re met with Malleus fucking Draconia.
SSS-class esper. Only because the measuring device physically cannot display values above SSS. If it could, it would probably just scream in binary before shutting itself down out of fear.
And Malleus, the walking cataclysm, smiles at you. A polite, almost sweet smile that absolutely does not match the soul-crushing amount of raw, unstable power radiating off of him.
He thanks you, so genuinely, for agreeing to guide him, and suddenly, you feel like maybe—just maybe—the guy who sent you a PowerPoint presentation about why he’d be the perfect esper for you would’ve been a safer choice. Because in what world were you qualified to guide Malleus Draconia?
But you’re a professional. A highly trained SS-class Guide. You’ve dealt with terrifying espers before. (You survived guiding Leona Kingscholar, and that man once threatened to bite someone’s hand off for waking him up.) So you take a deep breath, paste on a practiced, reassuring smile, and gesture toward the couch. “Please, take a seat.”
Malleus does, settling in like a well-mannered prince, and when you take his hands, his power hits you like a truck.
No, scratch that. A truck would be merciful. This is like getting yeeted into the sun.
Because for all his outward composure, for all his eerie, elegant calm, his body is ripping itself apart from the sheer force of his own abilities. His energy is so volatile, so uncontained, that even just touching him feels like holding onto a live wire dipped in liquid magic.
You open your mouth, fully prepared to yell WHAT THE HELL, but instead, what comes out is a weak, strangled, “So… how long has it been since your last guiding?”
Malleus blinks, tilting his head slightly, as if the question is odd. “Ah,” he hums. “A rather long time, I suppose.”
You squint at him. "Define 'long.'"
There’s a pause. And then, with the same pleasant smile, he says, “Over a decade.”
…A decade.
You stare at him. Your soul leaves your body. Your hands are on him right now, guiding him, and no other guide has touched him for ten whole years??? You’ve guided espers who've almost lost their minds after three months without stabilization, and this man—no, this monster, this eldritch entity in the shape of a handsome Esper—has been raw-dogging reality for a full decade???
And the worst part is, you get it.
You’ve heard the stories. No guide is willing to risk their life guiding him. He’s too powerful, too unstable, too dangerous. But also??? He’s the reason those cowardly soy-latte-drinking guides even get to enjoy their caramel cream monstrosities without getting eaten by a Gate Beast. The least they could do is try.
So you do.
You take all that power, all that impossible, barely-contained force, and you stabilize it. As much as you can, at least, because Malleus is like an ocean, vast and endless, and you are one person desperately trying to keep the tide from sweeping away an entire city. But you manage. And when the strain starts to weigh on you, when exhaustion creeps in, Malleus—ever the gentleman—gently removes his hands from yours before you overextend yourself.
He looks at you like you’ve done something extraordinary. And in that soft, almost reverent voice, he murmurs, “Thank you.”
And when he asks if you’d accept his request again, how could you possibly say no?
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You’ve seen Gates before. Too many, in fact. You’ve spent years standing at the edges of battlefields, waiting for Espers to stumble out after pushing themselves to their limits, ready to catch them before they crumbled into a pile of unstable, overpowered problems.
Usually, you’re waiting outside, stationed alongside other Guides, ready to stabilize the Espers who come stumbling out looking like they just did twelve rounds in a blender.
And today? No different.
The Gate suppressors finish their job, and as the shimmering tear in reality finally vanishes, a wave of exhausted Espers begins to stagger out.
Your fellow Guides immediately spring into action, swarming their assigned Espers like the world’s most exhausted yet underpaid nurses. You hear the usual litany of groaning, the occasional complaint about “why does guiding feel like drinking a warm glass of sadness,” and at least one voice yelling, “DON’T THROW UP ON ME, BRO.”
All in all, a standard post-Gate event.
But then—then.
Malleus Draconia walks out.
And the reaction is palpable.
Every Guide freezes. The air itself seems to shift, a held breath, a quiet hesitation, a collective someone else handle it.
Which, yeah. Fair. SSS-class esper. Walking apocalypse. If the world were a video game, he’d be the final boss, the secret bonus boss, and the eldritch horror you accidentally summon if you input the wrong cheat code.
But unlike every other high-class Esper, who would immediately demand a Guide’s attention like a toddler throwing a tantrum in a supermarket, Malleus just… looks around. Sees the other Espers getting help. And without a word, he simply starts walking away.
And something in you breaks.
It’s not just that your fellow Guides are scared of him. It’s the fact that he expects it. That he doesn’t even try. He just accepts that no one will come for him, and he leaves.
It’s one thing for a terrifying Esper to demand your attention, to expect you to fix them as if you’re a mechanic and they’re a car with the check engine light permanently on. But this? This quiet resignation? This acceptance of the fact that no one will help him?
Oh, absolutely not.
You push past the usual crowd of unstable, desperate, feral Espers who are trying to grab at your hands (“PLEASE, I WILL PAY YOU IN GOLD—OR FAVORS—WHICHEVER YOU PREFER”), and you march after him.
“Malleus,” you say, grabbing his arm before he can vanish into the night like a dramatic antihero.
He turns, blinking down at you in quiet surprise. “You’re here.”
“Of course I’m here,” you say, like he just told you the sky is blue. “I’m a Guide. This is my job.”
His expression flickers, the barest crack in his usual calm. “You would guide me?”
“Yes,” you say. “Now sit down.”
He actually listens. Thank the stars. You’re not sure what you would’ve done if he refused. Probably wrestled him to the ground, which would have been a terrible life choice, but whatever.
You sit across from him, take his hands, and—oh.
Oh.
Oh wow.
It's as bad, if not slightly better than the first time.
If guiding most Espers is like sifting through a river, guiding Malleus Draconia is like being pulled into the center of a supermassive black hole. It’s overwhelming, his power a heavy, crushing thing that hums under his skin like an unrelenting storm, pressing at the edges of your mind.
“How long has it been since your last session?” you ask, voice a little strained as you work to stabilize him.
Malleus tilts his head, thoughtful. “My last session was with you.”
Your grip tightens around his hands. “It's been 5 months.”
He hums. “No other Guide has been willing to take me on.”
That—that makes you want to throw something. Because sure, Malleus is terrifying. Sure, he’s a walking natural disaster. But he’s also the reason those Guides get to breathe.
You exhale sharply. “Well. That’s stupid.”
Malleus blinks. “Stupid?”
“Yes. Stupid.” You focus, pouring everything you have into stabilizing him, because you might not be able to guide him fully, but you sure as hell can make things better.
Malleus says nothing. He just… watches you.
And when you’re finally done—when you pull back, exhausted but satisfied—he tilts his head, voice soft.
“Allow me to escort you to your car.”
There’s a weight to the way he says it. A quiet intent.
You glance at the still-lingering crowd of Espers who have been waiting for their chance to pounce, and—ah.
That’s why.
Because Malleus walking with you means no one is about to harass you for an impromptu guiding session.
You glance back at him.
Malleus Draconia. The most powerful Esper alive. Unstable. Dangerous. Literally a walking storm.
“…Okay,” you say.
He walks you to your car, a steady presence at your side, and for the first time in years, you are not approached, begged, or proposed to on the way.
It’s peaceful.
Nice, even.
And as you slide into the driver’s seat, Malleus thanks you again, voice warm, quiet.
And impulsively—because your brain has fully given up on thinking before speaking—you blurt out, “Repay me by taking me out for coffee.”
There’s a pause.
A long one.
And then—Malleus smiles.
Not his usual polite, diplomatic smile. A real one.
And you realize, with sudden clarity, that you may have just changed the course of your entire life.
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The next day, you step out of the Guidance Center, utterly exhausted.
You’ve spent all morning dealing with overworked Espers who don’t believe they need guiding until they start twitching like a broken lightbulb. One guy genuinely tried to convince you that he was “built different” and then proceeded to collapse mid-sentence.
So yeah. You’re tired. You just want to go home, take a nap, and not think about the absolute disaster that is your job.
And then you see him.
Malleus.
Waiting just outside the building, standing with the kind of stillness that makes him look more like a painting than a person.
But it’s not just him.
It’s the flowers.
A full bouquet, wrapped neatly, cradled in his hands like something precious.
And when he sees you, he smiles.
Your brain immediately blue-screens.
You walk up to him in a daze, already bracing yourself for the inevitable attention this is going to bring because, let’s be honest—Malleus Draconia standing outside your workplace holding flowers is about to start rumors.
(And by rumors, you mean your coworkers are never going to let you live this down.)
But when you reach him, he doesn’t do anything dramatic. Doesn’t say anything insane like “these flowers pale in comparison to your radiance” or “I will obliterate anyone who disrespects you.”
(You have, unfortunately, received both of those lines from unstable Espers before.)
Instead, he simply hands you the bouquet, his voice warm. “For you.”
And just like yesterday, you realize—this is different.
It’s not some desperate attempt to tie you to him, not an unstable Esper trying to own their Guide before anyone else can get to them.
He’s just… appreciative.
Grateful.
Your heart does something very annoying and fluttery at that realization.
You glance at the bouquet, then back up at him, and—oh.
He looks so pleased.
Like giving you flowers is the highlight of his week.
“…Are you free for that coffee now?” he asks, tilting his head slightly, expectant but unassuming.
And despite your exhaustion—despite knowing that this is probably the beginning of something huge and irreversible—you find yourself smiling.
“…Yeah,” you say, holding the flowers a little closer. “Yeah, I am.”
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So far, this coffee date has been perfect.
You’re sitting across from Malleus, ranting about the absolute clowns you have to deal with daily.
“…And then this Esper looked me in the eyes and said, I will literally perish if you do not guide me this instant. Like. Sir.” You slap a hand on the table. “Sir. Please. This is a Starbucks.”
Malleus chuckles, eyes alight with amusement. “And what did you say to that?”
You sigh dramatically, tilting your head back. “I said, ‘Sounds fake, but okay.’”
He actually laughs at that—low and warm, and oh no, it’s really nice.
Before you can spiral about that, your drinks are ready. Malleus, being the gentleman he is, gets up to retrieve them.
And that’s when you feel it.
That unmistakable feeling of being watched.
Your instincts immediately go on high alert. Slowly, casually, you glance at the table next to you, expecting to see some shady esper trying to worm their way into your life.
What you actually see is so much better.
Sitting at the table next to you are three of the most suspicious individuals you have ever seen in your entire life.
The first one is a tiny man drowning in a trench coat three sizes too big, like a detective in a noir film gone wrong. He has an obviously fake mustache that is slightly peeling off his face, and he is watching you intensely.
Next to him, there is a guy wearing a tragically ugly pink wig.
He is asleep on the table.
Just. Fully unconscious. Like someone just unplugged him.
And finally—
A tall guy in fake glasses with an even faker nose, aggressively shoveling cake into his mouth while glaring at you like you just stole his firstborn child.
It’s silent.
You blink.
They blink.
And you immediately have to slap a hand over your mouth to keep from bursting out laughing.
Malleus returns, setting your drink in front of you, and you immediately point at the disaster trio sitting next to you.
“…Do you know them?” you ask, barely holding it together.
Malleus follows your gaze.
Sees the absolute circus happening at the next table.
And sighs.
A long, suffering sigh. The sigh of a man who has seen some things and has just realized he is doomed to see them for the rest of his life.
“Yes,” he says, like the words physically pain him. “Unfortunately.”
And that’s all you need to hear.
You immediately wave them over.
Because honestly?
Why not.
They look hilarious.
And you were right—Lilia (who introduces himself with a flourish and an actual theatrical bow) is an absolute riot. Silver, despite the crime against fashion sitting on his head, is actually very nice. And Sebek—who is still burning holes into you with his eyes—is begrudgingly polite, only because you’ve been guiding Malleus.
It turns into a full-blown sitcom.
At one point, Lilia pulls out a picture of an egg and tries to convince you that it's a baby picture of Malleus. You're not sure if he was serious. Sebek is still glaring at you, but it’s now 30% hostility, 70% begrudging respect. Silver almost faceplants into his drink.
Malleus, across from you, looks like he’s actively questioning all of his life choices.
It’s beautiful.
Eventually, when it’s time to leave, Malleus insists on walking you to your car.
And that’s when you notice it.
He’s pouting.
Not a dramatic pout. But his lips are slightly pressed together, his brows furrowed, like a cat that just got denied a seat on the kitchen counter.
You immediately find it endearing.
“What’s up?” you ask, amused.
Malleus exhales, glancing away. “…I was hoping for this to be a time where we could get to know each other.”
Oh.
Oh, that’s adorable.
You grin.
And before you can second-guess yourself, you lean in and press a quick kiss to his cheek.
Malleus freezes.
His eyes go wide. His breath catches. He looks like you’ve just blue-screened his brain.
You step back, grinning. “I'll see you around.”
And before he can respond, you slip into your car.
But as you drive away, you catch a glimpse of him in your mirror—
Standing there, hand pressed to his cheek, smiling like you just gave him the greatest gift in the world.
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You hate Gates.
You hate that they can just open whenever they want, completely ignoring normal human schedules like some kind of otherworldly chaos entities (which, to be fair, they are).
But mostly, you hate that they always seem to open in the middle of the night.
Like, is there some kind of Gate Union that collectively decided on this? Do they hold meetings where they specifically vote to screw over guides by opening at the most inconvenient times?
And in the dead of winter, no less.
Truly, suffering knows no bounds.
Still, you drag yourself out of bed, slap on as many layers as physically possible (to the point where you briefly resemble a sentient pile of laundry), and head to the Gate’s location. On the way, you stop by an all-night café, because if you’re going to be miserable, you might as well be miserable with hot chocolate.
You even get two cups.
Not because you always do this for espers (you don’t—they can suffer like the rest of you), but because he is different.
Malleus.
The most powerful esper on the field tonight. The one who singlehandedly keeps half the Gates from turning into full-scale disasters. The one who always acts like he’s completely fine no matter what comes out of them.
And, most importantly—
The one esper you have a ridiculous, stupid, undeniably massive soft spot for.
So, you wait.
And wait.
And wait.
You’re perched on a bench, holding your hot chocolates, trying not to think about how this is starting to feel like some kind of romantic drama scene, when you finally see him step out of the swirling remnants of the Gate.
Even exhausted, he still looks ridiculously elegant. His coat is dusted with frost, his dark horns curved like the wings of a dragon at rest. His presence—so big, so vast—immediately settles over the field, even as other espers struggle to regain their balance.
His expression is neutral, as always. Composed. Untouchable.
Until—
He spots you.
He blinks, as if surprised to see you.
And his face softens.
He doesn’t react right away, like he’s making sure he’s seeing correctly. But then, when it clicks, his lips part just slightly—an unspoken question, a faintly surprised blink—before they curve into the warmest, most gentle smile.
And wow. Wow.
Maybe the cold is getting to you, because you suddenly feel a little too warm.
You lift a hand and wave.
Malleus immediately starts walking toward you, his movements slow but steady. His eyes stay locked on yours, like he’s drawn to you without realizing it.
“You’re here,” he says, voice carrying that soft rumble that’s way too nice to listen to at this ungodly hour.
You roll your eyes. “Yeah, well, Gates don’t believe in work-life balance, apparently.” You hold up the second cup of hot chocolate. “Here. Thought you could use something warm.”
“For me?” he asks, sounding so genuinely touched that your heart does something stupid.
“No, for the other giant dragon esper who just walked out of that Gate,” you deadpan.
Malleus huffs out a soft laugh, the kind that makes you think he doesn’t do it nearly enough. He takes the cup from your hands, fingers brushing against yours, and you don’t miss the way he lingers there for just a second too long.
“You should let me guide you,” you say, reaching for his free hand.
Malleus makes a vague sound of protest. “That isn’t necessary.”
You stare at him.
He stares back.
And then, before he can argue further, you unleash your most powerful technique.
“Please?”
Malleus Draconia—the Apex Esper, the one who holds dominion over storms and shadows, the one who can level an entire battlefield with one command—
Folds like a house of cards.
“…Very well,” he murmurs, looking a little defeated, a little amused.
You beam and take his hand, immediately pressing your energy into his.
And wow, yeah, he definitely needed this.
His presence, which is usually so steady, flickers faintly at the edges. He must have been holding himself together through sheer force of will, because the second you start guiding him, his shoulders finally relax.
Not that he’d ever admit it, of course.
You feel his weight lean into you ever so slightly, just enough that you know he’s letting you support him. His energy curls around yours, vast and dark but gentle, like the hush of a midnight storm.
For a while, neither of you speak.
The night is quiet, save for the distant sounds of other guides working, of espers coming down from battle-highs.
You steal a glance at Malleus. His eyes are half-lidded, his breath even, his fingers curled loosely around yours.
“…You do this often?” he asks suddenly.
“What, guide tired espers?” you shrug. “Yeah. Someone’s gotta be here to catch them before they crash.”
Malleus hums, a thoughtful sound.
“…No,” he says. “I meant… this.”
You blink. “This?”
“Wait for me.”
Oh.
Oh.
Your grip tightens slightly, a flicker of warmth creeping up your neck.
“I—” You hesitate, then exhale through your nose. “No. Not really.”
Malleus watches you closely. You can feel his gaze on you even as you pointedly avoid meeting it.
“…Then why?” he asks, and his voice is so quiet, so genuine, that you feel yourself falter.
You take a deep breath.
And then, before you can overthink it, you grin.
“Well, you always push yourself too hard,” you say, squeezing his hand once for emphasis. “Someone’s gotta make sure you don’t keel over from exhaustion.”
Malleus huffs, clearly amused. “I assure you, I would not—”
“Uh-huh. Sure.”
He laughs, quiet but real, and your heart skips a very concerning beat.
“…You are quite peculiar,” he muses, gazing at you like you’re some kind of strange, fascinating mystery.
“Yeah, yeah, I get that a lot,” you say, waving a hand. “Now, if you really wanna thank me, take me out for coffee again later.”
Malleus pauses.
You watch, in real-time, as your words settle.
And then—
Slowly, slowly, he smiles.
“…I would like that,” he says, his voice quiet, but so very certain.
And suddenly, the cold doesn’t feel quite so biting anymore.
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It was late. Too late. So late that if anyone dared to bother you right now, you would simply keel over and die on the spot out of sheer spite. You had finished your work, logged everything, and were seconds away from clocking out and going home to live as a blanket cryptid when someone grabbed your wrist.
That was already mistake number one.
You turned around, tired and mildly homicidal, to see one of your fellow high-ranking guides standing there. You recognized them—someone competent, someone respected, someone you had never spoken to outside of required work matters.
And yet, here they were, gripping your wrist like you were about to reveal the secrets of the universe to them.
"You got a second?" they asked, eyes shining with something too intense for this ungodly hour.
No. You did not have a second. You barely had the energy to stand upright, let alone entertain whatever nonsense this was about to be. But before you could tell them that, they were already pulling you off to the side, lowering their voice like they were about to ask you for classified information.
"How’d you do it?"
Your brain, already running on fumes, barely processed the question. "Do what?"
"Don't play dumb," they said, looking equal parts exasperated and impressed. "How'd you bewitch Malleus Draconia?"
Your mind, previously sluggish and exhausted, full stopped.
The sheer audacity of the question short-circuited your ability to respond. You just blinked at them, waiting for them to explain whatever the fuck they were talking about.
They misinterpreted your silence as playing coy because they leaned in conspiratorially and hissed, "Don't gatekeep. We want a bite too."
It was at that moment you considered committing actual murder.
"I'm sorry. A bite?" you echoed, voice dangerously calm.
"You got Malleus Draconia—Malleus Draconia—to let you guide him, regularly," they stressed, looking half in awe and half like they wanted to shake you for answers. "No one else has ever gotten close enough to work with him like that. If we knew he was harmless, we would’ve stepped in ages ago. But we weren’t going to take the risk."
You could physically feel something in your brain snap.
So that was it. That was why. It wasn’t that they hadn’t had the opportunity to guide him—it was that they had actively chosen not to. They had taken one look at Malleus, decided it wasn’t worth the effort to risk handling someone as powerful as him, and just left him alone.
And now, because you had proven he wasn’t some terrifying force of destruction, they suddenly wanted in? They suddenly thought they deserved him?
Like he was some exclusive club they wanted membership to?
Your hand twitched. You ripped yourself free from their grip, scowling. "Screw this."
Their eyes widened slightly, clearly not expecting that reaction. "Wait—"
But you were already storming off, anger burning through your exhaustion. You didn’t even realize where you were going until you stepped outside—
And saw Malleus standing there.
Waiting.
For you.
His sharp eyes flickered with concern the second they landed on your face.
"Are you alright?"
Your rage didn't cool, but it twisted into something tighter, something that made your throat close up for an entirely different reason.
You didn’t answer. Instead, you reached out, grabbed his hand, and started dragging him down the street.
Malleus didn’t resist. He simply followed, letting you pull him along like this was perfectly normal behavior.
The café door chimed as you shoved it open with more force than necessary, still stewing over the conversation from earlier. Malleus, utterly unbothered, stepped around you to order both of your usual drinks without hesitation.
The fact that he had memorized your order without ever asking, without making a big deal of it, without using it as some kind of flex, made something in your chest ache.
You sat down at the table, staring blankly at the surface as you tried to untangle your emotions.
Why were you this angry?
Was it because they had ignored him? Because they treated him like some kind of trophy instead of a person? Because they had assumed the worst of him and only changed their minds when it was convenient?
Yes. Absolutely.
But then—why did you also feel like crying?
Your fingers curled into fists on the table.
And that’s when it hit you.
Oh. Oh, fuck.
You liked him.
Like like liked him.
Like the kind of like that made you want to scream into your hands and never recover. The kind of like that made you want to turn back time and stop this from happening before it was too late. The kind of like that meant your life was now ruined beyond repair.
Your whole body tensed, brain going into full meltdown mode.
And then—just to make everything infinitely worse—
A cup slid into view.
You looked up, and there he was.
Malleus.
Standing in front of you, holding out your drink.
His eyes were gentle, studying you carefully, like he could see every single thought racing through your head. "Are you alright?" he asked again, voice quiet, sincere.
And in that moment, you realized you had two options:
• Stay here, drink your drink like a normal person, and accept the horrifying truth of your newfound feelings.
• Launch yourself out of the nearest window and never be seen again.
Option two was looking real tempting right now.
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Another night, another gate opening at the worst possible time.
You were so tired. Bone-deep, soul-weary, existentially exhausted. The universe seemed determined to ensure that you never got a full night’s sleep, and you were starting to take it personally.
Still, you were here, bundled up against the cold, sipping a hot drink as you waited for Malleus.
The gate was a high-level one tonight. You knew it had to have been difficult—he was strong, but no one walked out of those things completely unscathed. So you were already standing up, ready to meet him halfway, when—
That guide.
The one who had all but interrogated you last time.
They stepped in before you could move, approaching Malleus with their best professional smile, like they hadn’t spent years pretending he didn’t exist.
"Do you need guidance?" they asked smoothly, their voice dripping with the absolute audacity.
Malleus blinked at them, clearly surprised. Because why wouldn’t he be? No one else but you had ever offered before.
And your chest burned.
Of course he’d pick them.
They were higher-ranked than you. More experienced. More respected. Malleus, despite everything, was still an outsider to most of the guide network, and it would make perfect sense to accept help from someone with more prestige.
You braced yourself, swallowing the bitter feeling threatening to rise—
But then—
He looked past them.
His eyes landed on you.
And then he smiled.
"I must decline," he said simply, voice polite but final.
And then—much to their visible horror—he walked right past them and straight to you.
The sheer triumph that surged through you was immeasurable.
You barely stopped yourself from cackling, but as you took his hand, guiding him like always, the urge to turn back and stick your tongue out at that seething guide was so strong.
Malleus, oblivious to your inner gloating, watched you with a softness that made your heart ache.
And then, suddenly, it all just—
Hit you.
The sheer depth of your feelings, the way your chest tightened at the sight of him, the way everything in you just settled when he was near—
You broke.
You grabbed him, yanking him forward, and before he could even react—
You kissed him.
Malleus let out a surprised sound against your lips, but after only a second of hesitation—
He kissed you back.
It was warm, steady, and when you finally pulled away, he was glowing, his expression soft in a way that made your breath catch.
"I like you, Malleus," you confessed, your voice quieter than you expected.
And his smile—
It was like you had given him the world.
He cupped your face so gently, kissed your forehead like he was sealing the moment into reality.
"I have feelings for you too," he murmured.
You melted.
You leaned against his chest, warmth seeping into you despite the cold night air.
And as his arms wrapped around you, as you felt the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, you couldn’t help but be so glad you had accepted his guidance request all that time ago.
(And okay, maybe you were also smug as hell about it. Because when you glanced back at that other guide—
They looked ready to throw hands.)
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You had been waiting.
Patiently. Lovingly. For months.
Malleus loved you. You loved him. You were in a relationship, you slept in the same bed, you guided him, he refused to let anyone else even offer—so what the hell was taking him so long?
Why wouldn’t he just ask?
It was infuriating. It was agonizing. It was the most painfully obvious conclusion to your relationship, and yet—
Malleus refused to bond with you.
And frankly? You were at your limit.
So tonight, as you lay wrapped around each other in bed, his arms comfortably encircling your waist, you finally decided to just ask him.
"Malleus," you said, looking up at him, voice soft but firm. "Why haven’t you asked me to bond yet?"
He stiffened. Just slightly. His fingers twitched where they rested on your back.
And then—
He gave you that look. The sad, gentle smile. The one that made your heart clench because it meant he was about to say something infuriatingly self-sacrificial.
"If you ever regret me," he murmured, "you won’t be able to guide anyone else." His thumb traced circles on your back, soothing even as his words infuriated you. "I don’t want that for you."
You froze.
You stared at him.
And in that moment, you were torn between laughing at his stupidity or crying because how could someone so powerful be so utterly dumb?
So you did neither.
Instead—
You kissed him.
You kissed him until he was breathless, until his arms tightened around you, until his body melted into yours and he let out the softest, neediest little sound against your lips.
When you pulled away, his pupils were blown wide, his expression dazed, and you felt the way his heartbeat had turned erratic beneath your palm.
"You," you whispered, pressing your forehead to his, "are the only thing I've ever been sure of in my life."
Malleus let out a shaky breath.
And then you kissed him again.
You pressed him into the bed, slotting yourself against him, feeling his hands grasp at you like he was afraid you might disappear.
But you wouldn’t.
Because you were here. You chose him.
And that night, you finally bonded—just as you always should have.
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Malleus had always been powerful. From the moment he was born, strength had been woven into his very being.
His draconic lineage alone made him stronger than most, but when his Esper abilities awakened, it had set him apart even further. Too far apart.
The strongest being in the world.
And because of that, people had feared him.
It had been that way for as long as he could remember. Even other Espers, who should have understood, kept their distance. Some whispered about him behind closed doors, about how a being as powerful as him didn't need guidance in the first place.
It had been Lilia who had guided him for most of his life, a steady presence who never flinched, never wavered, never treated him as if he were something to be afraid of. But when Lilia lost his guiding abilities, that stability was suddenly gone, leaving Malleus untethered.
For years, he had gone without. And then, one day, he heard about you.
You were a Guide who accepted nearly every request. You had guided Espers with overwhelming abilities, those who were labeled as difficult or too much to handle. You had never turned anyone away. And so, despite knowing the likelihood of rejection, Malleus sent a request.
He had expected nothing to come of it. But instead, he got you.
You had seemed nervous when you first met him, but it wasn’t the type of nervousness he was used to. There was no fear in your eyes, only cautious curiosity—an instinctive wariness, perhaps, but not rejection. And despite whatever initial hesitation you had, your hand had reached for his without trembling. You had guided him.
For the first time in over a decade, Malleus had felt light.
And then, the first time you guided him outside a Gate—
That had been a key moment in his life.
He had stepped out, battle-worn, expecting emptiness. And instead—you had waved at him.
You had smiled at him.
He had thought, at first, that perhaps you had simply been assigned to check on him. That maybe it was some unspoken duty, a requirement of your role. But then, as if that warmth weren’t enough, you had asked him to coffee.
He had expected a quiet outing, a moment to rest and speak with you in a more peaceful setting. Instead, Lilia, Sebek, and Silver had shown up, disguises both laughable and obvious, as if the flimsy mustaches and oversized trench coats could fool anyone. He had braced himself for your irritation, for exasperation or a resigned sigh.
But instead—you had laughed.
And then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, you had welcomed them to join you.
That had been the moment he first thought, perhaps, he liked you.
The first time you had brought him hot chocolate would forever be etched into Malleus’ memory.
It had been a bitterly cold night, the kind where the air cut through even the thickest of coats, where breath curled in the air like mist, and the sky was so crisp and clear that it felt endless.
The battle had left him drained, his energy worn thin in a way he had long since grown accustomed to. He hadn’t expected you to be there. There had been no reason for you to wait for him—you could have guided someone else, finished your duties quickly, and gone home to rest.
But instead, there you were.
Sitting on a bench, bundled in layers, your arms crossed to hold in whatever warmth you could, with two cups of hot chocolate in your hands. You had waved at him like it was the most normal thing in the world, like of course you were waiting for him. Like of course you had brought him something warm to drink.
He had been so startled by the sight that for a moment, he simply stood there, staring, trying to commit every detail to memory. The way the streetlights cast a soft glow against your skin, the way your breath curled in the cold, the way your fingers tapped against the side of the cup as you held it out to him.
He had taken it without a word, still dazed, still trying to process why you had done this. And then, as if you hadn’t just shaken the very foundation of his existence, you had grinned and asked him to take you out for coffee again.
Malleus had never known such warmth, even in the frigid winter.
Then there was the day he had waited for you.
He had been standing outside the guidance center, patiently waiting for you to finish your duties. It had been something of a habit by then—he always waited for you when he could, just as you waited for him. He enjoyed the way your eyes lit up when you spotted him, the way you always greeted him like you had been expecting to see him there.
But that day, when you finally stepped outside, there was no warm smile, no familiar greeting. Instead, you stormed out, eyes blazing, frustration radiating off you in waves. Malleus had barely opened his mouth to ask what was wrong before you grabbed his wrist and started dragging him down the street.
He followed without hesitation, allowing you to pull him along, his mind still catching up to what was happening. You had led him straight to your usual café, barely stopping to take a breath as you shoved the door open and beelined for your favorite spot. Malleus sat across from you, watching with quiet curiosity as you fumed, hands clenched around your menu, your foot tapping aggressively against the floor.
And then, as the tension in your shoulders refused to ease, as you let out a frustrated huff and glared at your drink like it had personally offended you, you had finally told him what had made you so upset.
They had questioned you. They had asked how you had bewitched him, of all people. Like he was some trophy, some untouchable relic that no one had dared lay claim to until you had somehow managed to crack the code. They had assumed that if he were harmless enough to guide, then they would have taken him for themselves. They had spoken about him like he was something to be owned.
Malleus had expected you to be upset. What he hadn’t expected was for you to be so furious on his behalf.
And he shouldn’t have liked it—shouldn’t have felt anything beyond quiet gratitude for your defense of him. But there was something ugly in his chest, something selfish and dark that thrived off the way your anger was so fiercely his.
For so long, people had feared him, had rejected him, had kept him at a distance out of self-preservation. And yet, here you were, not just standing by his side, but fighting for him, defending him, choosing him.
And he wanted that.
He wanted the way you almost stormed into battle for him. He wanted the way your voice shook with anger because you cared about how he was treated. He wanted the way you grabbed his wrist without hesitation, the way you dragged him to this café because he was the person you sought out in your frustration.
He wanted you.
And as you finally sighed, your anger fading just enough for you to take a sip of your drink, Malleus came to a quiet realization.
He had liked you before. But now?
Now, he was falling.
Malleus had never expected to be offered guidance by anyone else.
It had never once crossed his mind as a possibility—he had long since grown used to being avoided, used to the way others hesitated to even meet his eyes, let alone reach out to him. The moment he stepped out of the Gate, still feeling the lingering exhaustion of battle, he had been prepared to find you, as he always did.
And yet, instead of you, there was someone else.
A guide—one he recognized, one who had been among those who had always turned away from him before. And now, suddenly, they were standing before him, offering their assistance as if it were something he needed, as if he should be grateful.
Malleus didn’t even consider it.
How could he? How could anyone else fill the space that was meant for you? How could he even entertain the thought of accepting someone else’s hand when your hand was the only one he ever wanted to hold?
So he simply stepped past them, not bothering to spare them a second glance, not wasting a single breath on an answer. Because they were irrelevant.
Because you were there.
And the moment he spotted you, standing just a few steps away with that bright, warm expression that was meant only for him, he felt something in his chest ease. Like everything had shifted back into place, like the air had cleared, like he was where he was supposed to be.
And when you laughed, really laughed, like this was all some great joke only the two of you were in on, he thought it might be his favorite sound in the world.
And then you took his hand, and the moment your fingers intertwined with his, he knew with absolute certainty—there was no one else for him. There never could be.
And then you kissed him.
For all his years, for all his strength, for all his wisdom, Malleus Draconia had never once been prepared for this.
You had grabbed him, pulled him in, and pressed your lips to his, and Malleus had let out an embarrassingly surprised sound before his instincts took over, before his hands found their way to your waist, before he was kissing you back like he had been waiting for this moment for centuries.
And maybe he had been.
Because when you pulled back, just far enough to whisper, “I like you, Malleus,” he felt like the world had stopped spinning, like time itself had come to a halt just to give him this moment, just to let him have this.
And when he smiled, it was because it felt like you had just handed him the world.
So he kissed your forehead, let his lips linger against your skin, and whispered against you, “I have feelings for you too.”
And when you leaned against him, when you let yourself rest against his chest, Malleus felt something settle in his soul.
He was home.
Then you asked him to bond.
And Malleus hesitated.
Not because he didn’t love you—he did. He had never loved anything the way he loved you.
But because he was afraid.
Because bonding with him meant forever. It meant you would be tied to him, it meant you would never be able to guide anyone else, it meant that if one day you woke up and realized you regretted him—realized you wanted something else, something more, something that wasn’t him—then you would be trapped.
And he could not, would not, allow that to happen to you.
So he had told you no. Not because he didn’t want you, not because he didn’t ache for you in ways he could never put into words, but because he would die before he let you shackle yourself to him forever.
And then you had kissed him.
Hard.
You had pressed him into the bed, breathless and unyielding, your lips against his like you were trying to prove something.
And maybe you were.
Because when you finally pulled back, when your fingers threaded through his hair and your forehead rested against his, you whispered, “You’re the best decision I’ve ever made.”
And Malleus—Malleus, who had spent his entire life waiting to be chosen, waiting to be wanted—felt his walls crumble.
So he let himself believe you.
He let himself hope.
And when he kissed you again, when he let his hands roam over your skin and let himself take you, it wasn’t just an acceptance of your love.
It was a promise.
A promise that no matter what, no matter where life took you, no matter how much time passed—he would always be yours.
And as the bond settled between you, as he felt the pull of your soul entwining with his, Malleus let himself hope for more.
He hoped you would be with him forever.
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You woke up feeling warm.
Not just from the blankets wrapped around you, or the way the room was still dim from the early morning light, but from the way Malleus was wrapped around you.
His arms held you firm but gentle, his breath soft against your forehead, his body curled protectively around yours. It was comfort in its purest form.
You smiled, still basking in the afterglow of your bond, and tilted your head up to kiss him.
Malleus stirred, letting out a sleepy hum as his lips curved into a small, contented smile against yours. His eyes fluttered open, still hazy with sleep, and you both just… looked at each other.
The love in his gaze was overwhelming.
So, naturally, you asked the most important question of your life.
"Was the egg picture that Lilia showed me actually you?"
Malleus blinked.
Then blinked again.
And then, to your absolute delight, he looked flabbergasted.
"You—" He stopped, as if trying to process the sheer absurdity of your first words after bonding. "That is the first thing you wish to ask me?"
You nodded, completely serious. "I've been meaning to ask for a while."
And then—
Malleus laughed.
Laughed and laughed.
Deep and rich, his chest vibrating against yours as his entire body shook with amusement.
You pouted and waited for him to get it together, only for him to kiss your forehead, still grinning.
"Yes," he admitted, eyes twinkling. "That was me."
You gasped. Vindication.
Finally.
The mystery that had plagued you for months was solved.
With a triumphant little noise, you snuggled back into him, pressing your face against his chest as sleep threatened to claim you again.
Malleus chuckled, tucking you closer, and as he rested his chin atop your head, he couldn’t help but think—
Despite your eccentricities, he had never been happier than being yours.
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Masterlist
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wlwcatalogue · 5 months ago
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A Gay Girl's Guide to Takarazuka
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L to R: Sagiri Seina, Ouki Kaname, Amami Yuuki, Asumi Rio, Wao Youka, Asaji Saki, Shiraki Ayaka
If you’re queer and into theatre or Japanese media, chances are that you will have heard of all-female theatre company Takarazuka Revue… but it’s also equally likely that you won’t have checked out anything of theirs. For those who are curious but were intimidated by its over 100 years of history, or who just want a quick primer to ease in, click below!
1. Why get into Takarazuka?
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L to R: Rei Makoto in Tiara Azul (2024), Yuzuka Rei
For those into androgynous women
As you probably already know, Takarazuka's big selling point is that it's an all-female theatre company where the male characters are played by women. The actresses are expected to continue presenting that way off-stage, which in practice means a lot of handsome women with short hair in binders and men's clothing... Why that might appeal to people who are into androgynous women (or GNC/enby folks) is pretty obvious.
Reality Check:
Sadly, after "graduation" (i.e. leaving Takarazuka), nearly all such actresses will transition into feminine presentation and take on female roles. It's similar to the "lesbian glasshouse" idea in Class S yuri, but for gender non-conformity. That said, there are some notable counter-examples: Shion Yuu and Nanami Hiroki have basically refused to change their presentation after graduating (the latter still frequently plays male characters in both anime and stage productions), and things are more relaxed lower down the rungs too.
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L to R: Wao Youka & Hanafusa Mari, Sagiri Seina & Sakihi Miyu
For those into butch/femme pairs
Just as roughly half of Takarazuka's actresses specialise in male roles (otokoyaku/男役), there is another half specialising in female roles (musumeyaku/娘役). On top of that, Takarazuka is split into five different troupes, and for any given production, the male lead and female lead are automatically assigned to that troupe's "top star" (leading otokoyaku) and "top musumeyaku" (leading musumeyaku) - the "top combi".
Unlike leading pairs in other theatrical traditions, the "top combi" concept extends to them being marketed as a pair in interviews, magazine features, TV programmes, etc. Just watch the mini TV special where Sagiri Seina and Sakihi Miyu visit Tokyo Skytree and Sumida Aquarium-- it's basically a date, and is described as such by the commentating TV announcer. Likewise, Wao Youka and Hanafusa Mari were interviewed about being a "golden combi" by women's magazine Fujin Kouron (though to be fair this was after they had, improbably, managed to win a Kikuta Kazuo Theatre Award - an award for individuals - jointly, for their "splendid performance as a combi" in 2004's Boxman).
Taken to its extreme, there have been cases where the Japanese public have been convinced that a top combi was dating, as with the immensely popular 1980's pair Daichi Mao and Kuroki Hitomi... It's no wonder that the actresses themselves frequently describe it as being like an arranged marriage.
Separately, due to certain reasons, it's practically part of the job description for top musumeyaku to adore their top star partners. This, in theory, inadvertently creates a safe space for any top musumeyaku who could be gay for their stage partners... Just to illustrate, during her graduation speech, Hinami Fuu repeatedly referred to her feelings for her top star partner Hokushou Kairi as koi (恋), a word specifically denoting romantic love, and nobody blinked an eye.
Reality Check:
Due to conservative attitudes in both Japan and Takarazuka itself, most actresses go on to marry men, including many of those named above. Vanishingly few are publically out, though former otokoyaku Higashi Koyuki (stage name Aura Maki) is a queer activist and was one half of the first same-sex couple to be married in Japan, and another former otokoyaku, Misuzu Aki, has been living with her female partner in Europe for years. Just, well, don't forget that being married to a man isn't necessarily evidence of heterosexuality.
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L to R: Asumi Rio in The Poe Clan (2018), Sagiri Seina in Rurouni Kenshin (2016)
For lovers of anime and manga
Takarazuka is probably best-known as the inspiration behind Revolutionary Girl Utena, Revue Starlight, Kageki Shoujo, and Sailor Moon’s Haruka and Michiru, but did you know that it also inspired seminal works featuring androgynous female leads such as Princess Knight? If you enjoy “prince-type” characters in yuri, you’ve got them to thank
Apart from inspiring anime and manga, Takarazuka also does quite a few animanga adaptations itself! Most famous are their Rose of Versailles musicals, but other popular adaptations include Ace Attorney, Rurouni Kenshin, Lupin III, Boys Over Flowers, and Hagio Moto’s bishounen vampire vehicle The Poe Clan. They’re also doing a Castlevania musical this year!
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Wao Youka & Hanafusa Mari in Phantom (2004)
For the theatre nerds
Female Phantom of the Opera, duh
Jokes aside, Takarazuka’s unique position in the theatre world can't be overstated. As a rule, all-female productions are either smaller-scale, one-offs dependent on the work, or part of a theatrical tradition completely separate to Western-style plays or musicals (hello, Chinese Yue opera). Takarazuka is the exception: it offers productions comparable in size and scale (and budget) to the largest West End and Broadway musicals - it just so happens that it's all-female.
If the all-female aspect doesn’t excite you then why are you here, then let me emphasise again: Takarazuka is totally worth checking out as a production company in its own right. It is very much a part of the broader Japanese musical industry, and one of its powerhouses at that. Just take a look at some of these clips from past productions (all around 5 mins or less):
(a) Maeda Keiji - a musical loosely inspired by real-life samurai Maeda Keiji; features an uncannily convincing horse performed by two people in costume which needs to be seen to be believed (b) Ephemeral Love - a period piece about the doomed love between Prince Rudolph of the Hapsburgs and his lover Marie Vetsera (c) The Man Who Never Sleeps - a biographical musical about Napoleon Bonaparte (d) Casino Royale - an adaptation of the 2006 James Bond movie of the same name (e) BADDY - an off-the-wall sci-fi comedy featuring loads of velvet suits, silly shellfish outfits, and queerness.
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Wao Youka and Hanafusa Mari in Dracula (2011)
2. Random Queer-ish Trivia
It's pretty common for former otokoyaku to be cast in WLW roles: Sena Jun headlined the 2018 Japanese production of Fun Home, Otozuki Kei cameoed as a lesbian escort in 2022 LGBTQ-themed J-drama Kojinsa Arimasu, and Seto Kazuya played the owner of a lesbian bar in 2024 yuri J-drama Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko. (Incidentally, Sal Jiang, the original creator of Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko, has mentioned being a fan of Sena Jun when she was younger)
Otokoyaku are sometimes mistaken for men, with amusing results: Yuzuka Rei was thought to be a “host” by a passer-by while talking to her fans, and Houshou Dai has mentioned being hit on by a woman before. But the prize goes to Todoroki Yuu, who like many women once had to rebuff unwanted advances from a man—except in her case, he thought that she was a guy
Before entering Takarazuka, Sou Kazuho – eventual Snow Troupe top star – went to a co-ed school and had long hair. To her confusion, this didn’t stop her classmates from asking her to play a male character (possibly the male lead, IIRC) in the school play. They saw her as an otokoyaku even before she did!
Continuing with the high school theme, former Cosmos Troupe top star Wao Youka has boasted about how in her high school days, she received more Valentine’s chocolates than her brother, and in fact second-most out of her year. Important note: she went to a girls’ school
Speaking of Wao Youka, her 2011 Dracula (see photo above) - from @cryoverkiltmilk's “Cunt Dykecula” post - wasn't actually a Takarazuka production! Since Wao was acquainted with and later married its composer Frank Wildhorn, some assume he was the one to cast her, and that Hanafusa Mari was brought in due to being her old stage partner. But Wildhorn had wanted Wao to play the female lead. It was she who insisted on Dracula. And Hanafusa wasn't just a third party... she had been Wao's manager since 2007, having retired from the stage after graduating and only just returned with 2010's Dietrich. (She played Edith Piaf, legendary chanson singer and “very good friend” of bisexual icon Marlene Dietrich, played by Wao.) Dracula was the swan song for their partnership, with Hanafusa going on to conquer the Japanese musical industry as she had Takarazuka-- but it marked the first, and so far only, time a top combi performed as romantic partners after graduating.
On a separate note, renowned queer photographer Leslie Kee has been responsible for taking the cover portraits for Takarazuka's offical monthly publication Kageki (歌劇) since 2010. You should definitely check out his ongoing "Out in Asia" project – he's taken literally thousands of photos of out queer people in Japan, Singapore, and Taiwan in a bid to raise visibility
Lastly, in November 2015, Takarazuka City became the first Japanese city outside of Tokyo to announce its support for same-sex partnerships… though this may of course be a total coincidence.
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Flower Troupe in Takarazuka Fantasia (2015 Taiwan tour)
3. Where to Start?
Nearly all Takarazuka shows since the 1990's are available on DVD (earlier ones are on VHS), and these recordings are very well done - they have great video and audio quality, are well-edited, and use a large number of camera angles
They do livestreams and live broadcasts of performances as well! You can watch a livestream from your mobile or PC by spoofing your location. For a more communal experience, if you're in Japan, Taiwan, or Hong Kong, you can catch live broadcasts of Grand Theatre performances at a local cinema
VODs of selected productions are available on various platforms, including Amazon Japan, though this still requires location spoofing. If you're actually living in Japan, you can also consider subscribing to Takarazuka's official TV channel (yes, that's a thing) Sky Stage - they do a lot of reruns of past performances
With that done, here are several recommendations if none of the productions mentioned throughout the post caught your eye!
(a) Elisabeth - Michael Kunze and Sylvester Levay's musical about Empress Elisabeth ("Sisi") of Austria and the fall of the Hapsburg Empire, featuring an (inevitably very sexy) personification of Death and fantastic music. Takarazuka has done many, many productions of this, so just search them and pick whichever looks most appealing - but you won't go wrong with the 2014 Flower Troupe production, which has a very strong cast and a more refined version of the staging
(b) Phantom - Arthur Kopit and Maury Yeston's adaptation of Phantom of the Opera. Though obviously not the ALW version, the music is actually pretty great and Takarazuka goes all-out on the costumes and stage magic. All the productions are wonderful, but my favourite is the original 2004 version (which is also the one which went viral on Tumblr before - thanks, @wheel-of-fish!)
(c) Rose of Versailles - no list would be complete without Takarazuka's representative work, buuut I wouldn't necessarily recommend starting here if you're looking for a typical musical experience. There are loads of productions to choose from - note that these are split between a version focused on protagonist Oscar, and another focused on Marie Antoinette and her lover Fersen - but the 1991 Moon Troupe production is my personal pick
(d) Casanova - a light-hearted romp in which Casanova is reimagined as a charming playboy who falls for the feminist-minded daughter of Venice's mayor... only, she doesn't know his real identity. The very catchy music was commissioned from Dove Attia, the producer behind French musicals Mozart, l'opera Rock and 1789: Les Amants de la Bastille. Check out the performance digest here!
(e) Shinjuu: Koi no Yamatoji - Takarazuka puts Chikamatsu Monzaemon's tale of the doomed love between a commoner and a courtesan to a classic rock score (see this clip!). An Edo-era work that doesn't just focus on samurai and nobility, this romantic tragedy offers a grounded look at the social pressures of the time. (Though if you do want to watch something focusing on Japanese nobility, I highly recommend Takarazuka original and guaranteed tearjerker Hoshiai Hitoyo.) There are quite a few productions of this, but I've only watched the 2014 Snow Troupe one, which was very good.
Thanks so much for reading! Please feel free to DM me or send an ask if you have any questions~ I definitely want to do a follow-up post on musumeyaku, and maybe delve into Wao and Hanafusa's history (it's messy, but fascinating)... but we'll see!
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enjakey · 3 months ago
Text
Beneath the Blue
Pairing: marine engineer!Jake x marine biologist!Fem!Reader
Hey guys, I realise this fic is like really long (24k). I’m so sorry but it’s just something I’ve been holding out on. Life’s been stressful and writing was the only thing that kept me afloat and I kinda belted this out during my sleepless nights. This is definitly not proof read.
So I guess I wanted to give you guys like a guide on how to read the fic. Each section or chapter is marked by bolded words in the beginning of a paragraph (you’ll understand when you read it). If you’re only here for the cutesy stuff, you can go ahead and skip to the fourth chapter but you’ll loose all context of the story and how everyone is related to each other. The first two chapters is just a lot of world and character building. The third chapter is where things actually start.
If you’re interested in marine biology and sea creatures, this is a perfect read. I talk a lot about sharks and whales and sea creatures. There’s a lot of insight on what marine biologists do in general. There’s suggestive stuff in the end of the seventh chapter and smut in the tenth chapter if you want to skip to that. Jay, Heeseung and Jay are a huge part of the fic (but not the plot?). There is mentions of PTSD and a storm.
I want to mention that this story is not just about Jake and Y/N’s romance but about a group of people’s love for the ocean. The other characters are important for me too and the world I’ve built is dear to me. Hope you guys enjoy! I Put a lot of time effort into this! Please like and reblog and comment.
Summary: taken under the wing of the great marine biologist Henry Sim, Y/N finds herself getting close to him and his family. She’s friends with his first son, Jason, but is apprehensive of his second son, Jake. Jake, who is notorious for his bad behaviour and disappointing decisions, finds himself being drawn to Y/N and her undeniable love towards the ocean. When the two are put together in a group of researchers for an expedition for three months on the ocean, she doesn’t expect herself to fall for him- let alone, fight storms for him.
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Y/N was one of those unfortunate kids who had to be in a hospital during her birthday. She was eleven at the time, the age where she was learning to read and write on her own and didn't fuss with her mother to help her bathe or dress up. She considered it her golden age where she was just starting to learn about her interests by surfing the internet through her father's phone and transitioning from cartoon shows to movies. At school, she would talk about action films, starring Tom Cruise or Angelica Jolie, rather than the deemed childish Disney movies where the Jonas Brothers were thrown into a music camp or in which a girl hides her identity by switching wigs.
An unwanted growth, widely mistaken as a malignant tumour by many doctors, was manifesting on the bone just above her eyebrow and she had reached the age where surgeons could successfully remove it without life-threatening complications. Y/N was initially scared, refusing to get out of bed in the morning and crying while she was taken to the Operating Room. In that moment of panic and fear, she didn't feel like the brave and mature girl she thought herself to be but somewhat similar to the girls on the playground who still talked about Barbie dolls and played around with make-up sets as though they could ravishingly decorate their faces with cheap lip gloss and colourless eyeshadow.
When she woke up from an anaesthetic daze, she took a moment of silence to compare herself with the other children in her class. If any kid was in her situation, being taken into surgery by a group of a dozen strangers who were only trusted because of a piece of paper- their certificate- that was meant to credit their skill, they would flail the way she had. The girls she avoided, the mean and blonde-haired ones who snickered at anyone who didn't wear skirts and pink bows in their hair and bragged about their powerful daddy's luxurious car, would probably react the way she did, perhaps even a little more dramatically. The boys she arbitrated, the cocky and lanky ones that talk about Fortnight and whatever online games they played, would probably wail like babies. But Y/N was different, whatever that meant for a girl her age, withholding herself from succumbing to middle school's criteria for popularity and burrowing herself into a circle of comfort. She was the girl that wore glasses and carried around a thick book about animals to read during lunch and she was the girl that only had one friend because they were both weird and quiet. She was the girl that cried before the surgery because she didn't trust the surgeons and not because she was convinced her parents were selling her to an organ-harvesting cult.
While she assumed most children her age would be amused by artistic renditions of unicorns and rainbows painted on the wall, she found them rather tacky. Their eyes were too shiny and their smiles were too wide and the only thing she found realistic were the tiny chips of paint in the bright colours. There was a painting of Jake the Dog from Adventure Times sitting right above her hospital bed, staring down at her with lifeless and beady eyes while she tried sleeping during the night because the hospital wanted to keep her for observation for a day or two after the surgery, increasing the service bill at the same time. Then, there was the poorly mimicked roar of a lion stained to the wall on the right side of her bed, making her wonder if these paintings were done by previously admitted children. To the wall on the right side of her bed, right below the window, was the painting of a grinning shark and a randomly doodled jellyfish.
"That looks like the Black Sea Nettle," she pointed at the jellyfish with her nimble finger.
It was early in the morning and her mother had willed her awake from her slumber so one of the doctors could check on her vitals and change her bandaid. Y/N chewed on a green apple slice her mother handed her because she refused to eat the red apples, and patiently waited until the doctor, or Doctor Karev, as he called himself, could finish writing on a piece of paper they called a chart and changing the cotton wedged between her eyebrow and white gauze. She glanced at the painting from the corner of her eye, finding it eerily similar to a picture she saw in the book her father gifted her on her ninth birthday- The Encyclopedia of Animals.
"And that looks like a Bull Shark," she said and shifted her finger slightly so it was pointed at the cartoonish shark with a bulging stomach.
"Oh, yeah?" Doctor Karev scoffed and grinned similarly to the painted shark. His gaze didn't lift from the writing pad he held towards his face, a pen scribbling information that probably wasn't important. Her mother stood beside her, a proud smile on her face as she brushed Y/N's hair with her palm. "What can you tell me about it?"
"I know that their bite is much stronger than the Great White," she offered, shrugging and looking at her lap.
"Really?" Doctor Karev almost sounded sceptical. "Where'd you learn that?"
"A book," Y/N mumbled and pursed her lips.
Doctor Karev bent his knees enough to reach her level, tilting his head affectionately to grasp her attention. His pen was now hanging in his pocket, his writing pad pressed between his hand and thigh. "You're a smart girl, aren't you?" He praised her, impressed by her skill of comprehension. "You wanna become a marine biologist?"
"Marine biologist?"
The pair of words put together were foreign to Y/N but somehow, they sounded like they were meant to be beside each other, creating the word for the profession she had been dreaming of since she saw the picture of starfish lounging on a sea bed. Her eyes were filled with somewhat of a fascination, a sparkle reflected by what she considered a discovery and fate of luck and her smile grew ten folds, stretching her cheeks until the corners of her lips reached her ears. She looked like she was watching the stars while she looked at him, blinking and burning from a close distance as she marvelled at the masses.
"Yeah," Doctor Karev enthused. "You know, study the ocean and sea creatures and all that jazz."
"I'm gonna become a marine biologist!" She nodded, giggling like a baby that had been handed a lollipop bigger than its face. Except Y/N's lollipop was a profession, a dream to chase until it was fulfilled. Her mother laughed with her, shaking her head at her antics. "Mom, I wanna be a marine biologist!"
Doctor Karev chuckled and stood straight, making his way to the door of her hospital room and looking over his shoulder to steal one last glance at the girl he might have just paved a future for. "By the way," he said. "Happy birthday kid."
It was a crystal blue sight Jake could never get used to, and it was the fact that his family owned it that he could never wrap his head around. The aquariums ranged from floor-to-ceiling tanks holding hundreds of litres of water and aquatic species to small fish bowls holding the tiniest, most common breeds of fish. Any type of fish he could think of- sharks, whales, stingrays, eels, jellyfish and cephalopods- it was probably all there, confined between glass walls, concrete and artificially plated corals. And it could all be placed in the palm of his hand, the happiness of customers and livelihood of every creature in the building he stood in, under his control.
In all of Jake's life, he had only ever seen his father angry four times- three of those incidents pertaining to tragedies faced in The Marine Foundation of Korea, his most prized possession.
The first was when he was forced to step into court for the first time in his life. During the first week that it opened, a kid tripped and fell into an eel tank and was almost choked by a Black Spotted Eel. The kid was lucky they weren't electric but Henry Sim was still faced with a million-dollar lawsuit which they won after giving security camera footage that showed the boy clearly wandering off into prohibited territory and climbing ladders into the opening of the tanks. It wouldn't be the first lawsuit they faced as a similar one followed two years later when a little girl started crying because her necklace fell into the dolphin pool and one of them devoured it.
Two years later, one of three Whale Sharks had passed away in front of a live audience causing the building to rumble as the carcass made contact with the forged ocean bed and children to wail in confusion as one of their favourite shark buddies was sinking to the floor. Hundreds of people took videos and the news went viral online, causing critics to criticise the maintenance and care for the captive creatures. As this information circled to tourists, they didn't have customers and a proper flow of income for the following six months until they announced the new exhibit for the endangered Vaquita Dolphin. Jake remembered the terrible nights of those six months when his father would come home drunk or would shatter glasses onto the walls. He wondered how his mother coped with him. He wondered how he and his brother didn't perceive him as a monster yet.
A year later, The Marine Foundation of Korea would face another tragedy. One of the shark tanks exploded in the middle of the night, causing Hammerheads and Tiger Sharks to swim through the halls of the first floor in shallow waters. Guards were panicking and emergency services took hours to reach the aquarium before they could assess and plan a rescue. The aquarium was shut down for two months and they spent time reinstating the shattered shark tank and brewing up safety measures for when similar situations would occur again. That night, they lost two Hammerhead Sharks and one Tiger Shark and had to pay thousands of dollars as compensation. Though his father didn't violently drink, he had become dangerously silent in those two months, scaring the living daylights out of his wife and children.
Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea and the most remarkable marine biologist known to all generations, had faced lawsuits that almost made him go bankrupt and was hated by the internet for months until he publicly apologised yet he would say his biggest disappointment wouldn't lie in the way his aquarium was run. Rather, he would say his biggest disappointment lay in his son, Jake Sim, who refused to take in his footsteps and fulfil his dreams of creating an empire of nepotism to take over the world of marine biology someday.
"You never listen to me," Henry seethed with a balled fist resting on his ebony table. His voice was entirely stark for the disappointment he felt towards his son.
If Jake concentrated enough, he could hear the movement of each aquatic species in the tanks he was surrounded by. The bubbly and almost ear-blocking white noise engulfed him sometimes and he would be transported to an unnamed beach where the sand was white and the waters were so clear, he could see the corals growing underneath. He liked to imagine himself floating in the waters in shorts and an oversized white t-shirt, eyes closed as the sun beat down on his porcelain skin. That was all the ocean was to him; someplace to enjoy and someplace to destress. But to his father, it was a career he made billions in and it was a career he wanted both his sons to endeavour in.
"I've been telling you since I was a kid, appa," Jake sighed, standing on the other side of the ebony table. "I want to study engineering. Marine biology, researching new species, the ocean… All of that has always been a hobby for me. Besides, you have Jason to take over your legacy anyway. I don't get why you're so hung up on me studying it, too."
In the corner of his father's office stood a small, well-kept fish tank with a lone seahorse in it. It was the Knysna Seahorse, to be exact, the rarest seahorse in the world which Jason, his brother, gifted their father as a gift. He had paid quite an amount of money to get a hold of it and the reason for the gift? It was because he had finally graduated with a marine biology degree a few months ago and Jake was to finally attend the same university.
But he didn't want to and his entire family was very well aware of the fact.
"Don't you understand what I want for you two, though?" Henry slammed his fist against the table but Jake offered no reaction. "Don't you see the future I see for you two? Brothers taking over marine biology's legacy? It’s not too late for you to change your major."
"No," Jake stomped a foot to the ground, eyes squinting to slits. "That's your dream. Not mine. I get that you and your brother never got along and that you want your sons to get along and run a business. But I don't want that. Jason and I are fine as it is and you coming in between my dreams is just gonna drive me away from you further."
"Jake-"
"If eomma were here, she would understand," Jake took long strides towards the door, a hand digging into the pocket of his slacks as the other twisted the doorknob. "I just wish you'd understand," and his voice muffled under the slam of the door, leaving Henry dumbfounded in his seat, mouth agape and glasses sliding off his nose.
With his son leaving so disrespectfully, using his wife's death as emotional manipulation, he wanted to shun Jake right then and there. He wanted no relation to him whatsoever but he knew it was his anger speaking. And he knew that if he hastily cut him off his earnings and stopped paying for his education, he would regret it and Jason would condemn him as a worse father than he already was.
So, Henry let him walk away and he went back to work, fixing his glasses and clearing his throat as if nothing happened. Jake was still young, he'd tell himself. If he wanted to follow his dreams, he should let him. Henry was selfish, he accepted it and his ego clashed with his conscience but he brushed it off and walked out of his office with more errands to complete. The moment he entered the hall with tanks of jellyfish surrounding him, the sounds of their bodies pushing through water syncing with his racing, angry heart, his assistant joined his side with a clipboard and pen, her heels overpowering the serenity of his silence.
“What’s next on today’s itinerary?” Henry asked with his hands clasped behind his back, strides becoming slower with every step.
“You need to meet with the university students today, sir,” Hae, his assistant, stated as though she expected him to remember the important occasion.
“Don’t speak to me in that tone,” he grumbled. “Of course I remember.”
“I’m assuming the talk with your son went badly?”
“I don’t know what to do with him, Hae.”
With this sigh echoing the moment, the pair made their way through the shark exhibit that costed him millions of dollars to fix all those years ago and sauntered past the stingray tanks, wondering how he was going to be an inspiration to a group of marine biology students while he felt like a failure of a father. He wondered what else he had to contribute to the field of marine biology when he had prioritised it for his entire life. It was the reason why his son hated him and it was the reason why he lost his wife- it was his lack of presence and immense ignorance that put him in a place where he truly had nothing else to lose. He had the money, the cars, the friends to brag with and an eldest son who was succeeding in life without his help- but then there was his youngest, defying him in all manners and reminding him of the mistakes that haunted his life.
However, a beacon of hope, a ray of sanguine had entered his life that day and he wouldn’t realise it until he was laying on his deathbed. In the group of future marine biologists he met that day was Y/N, standing amongst the crowd meekly with a notebook and a pen to jot down everything that she thought would help her education and career. She was the one answering questions in a whisper when no one else knew the answer, her hand barely raised in the air. When Henry saw her, her hair tied in a ponytail and clothes put together in a hurry that made her look pathetic, he could only smile. Because as he looked at her, he saw himself- the version of him that was left in the gates of his college, the version of him that had to be left back in order to become the tycoon that he was now.
So before the group of university students left, he found himself asking Y/N for a conversation and pulled her towards the gift shop while the rest of her classmates waited at the gate, murmuring and whispering about what they could be talking about. Henry placed a heavy hand on her shoulder and smiled at her the way a mentor would smile at his mentee. He had a proud smile on his face as he said, “I think you’d make an amazing marine biologist one day.”
“What?” Y/N, the poor girl, having been put down by her classmates her whole life, was gaping at his statement. Her eyes reflect a sense of hope and surprise under the golden lights of the gift shop.
“Yes,” Henry nodded enthusiastically. “I would like it if you worked with me, I could easily offer you a job,” he said. He shuffled his hand around in the pocket of his blazer and pulled out his business card and handed it to her, certain that it would come in handy for her future. “When you’re ready for a job or an internship- anything, just call me and I’ll help you out.”
Henry walked away from her, leaving his future student dumbfounded. Her eyes fixated on the business card in her hands, her thumbs and forefingers outlining the corners of the rectangle. It was a navy blue colour, his name, number and The Marine Foundation of Korea carved in golden ink. It looked like her ticket to a new life, the life she had chased since she was a little kid carrying around an encyclopaedia of animals. It was the golden ticket in her Charlie and The Chocolate Factory.
It was a good analogy in her head. Henry Sim, the man with greying hair and diminishing eyesight, was Willy Wonka and she was Charlie, the lost boy that simply wanted a taste of something better, something great. So when it was time for her to get an internship, Henry had taken her under his wing.
“You must be Y/N.”
When Y/N started off as an intern, she started questioning whether she had made the right choice. Some of her friends were off travelling the seven seas to research unknown species of the depths and others were working in labs established on beach sides. They were living in tropical islands like the Caribbean or Hawaii and their instagrams were filled with them in diving gear and sea creatures in their natural habitats. Y/N had always dreamt of a life as such, to swim with sharks and study their behaviours or to explore the depths of the ocean floor within the safety of a yellow submarine. She imagined she would travel the world by the time she graduated college and she imagined spending most of her days on a boat, whale watching or spotting dolphins.
There was that one semester in college where she got an experience as close to what she imagined. She, along with a few other promising students, were selected to spend a semester on sea where they spent learning how to dive and sail ships. It was a memorable four months, really, to spend it with a group of people she later called friends and bonding with people on sea over half cooked fish. In that time, though the most astonishing creature they spotted was a Red Octopus, she assumed she was being trained for the future she had always dreamed of, only to end up within the confines of an aquarium- Asia’s largest aquarium, granted. Her job description as an intern included watching other employees take care of the confined species or listening to Henry, the founder, teach her more about the marine species while she took notes. There were the occasional times she was asked to write a research paper, which she did with Jason but she would much rather prefer doing the same in a lab on the beach or on a boat sailing across the Pacific Ocean.
During this time, she pondered if she should have just followed her father’s footsteps in becoming an astronomer. She would look back at her childhood when her father would teach her about constellations and planets while she looked through the giant telescope that was perched on their roof and she would wonder if such a job would make her happier. She recalled the stories her mother would tell her as a Greek historian and wondered if she should have majored in History instead. She even wondered if she should have followed her friends into their jobs instead of taking the internship in the first place. Her uncertainties came to a halt a year ago, though, when Henry promoted her as manager.
In the five years that Y/N started working in The Marine Foundation of Korea, she learnt the names and voices of everyone working there. As the manager, it wasn’t only her job but also her duty to do so, to know who she was working with and grow a personal relationship with the people around her. She knew that one of the janitor’s kid had a heart condition and she would visit him in the hospital once in a while. She knew that one of the divers working for the aquarium was in a long term relationship and was planning on proposing to his girlfriend soon- she could recognise his voice even while he struggled to speak underwater. She also knew that her boss and legal guardian, Henry Sim, had ambitions he could never fulfil because of his youngest son.
One could call her the all-knowing within the walls of the aquarium. Not only was she intelligent, she was the keeper of all the employees’ worries and burdens.
In those five years that she spent reaching her level of success, to be able to buy her own apartment in an expensive neighbourhood and to be able to afford to buy a new phone without double-checking her bank account, she had learned a lot of tricks to perfect the skills of managing the establishment that she ran when the owner wasn’t present. A once shy and timid girl became the hard-headed, thick skinned superior that demanded precision in completed work and pristine publications of whatever research papers they release. But when she wasn’t acting that way, she was calm and walked down the crystalline hallways of Korea’s beloved and prestigious aquarium with a welcoming smile.
Of all the people she knew that worked amongst the aquarium, of the few people she found herself acquainted with, the voice that was breathing into her ear from behind her did not belong to anyone she was familiar with. She could feel his chest ghosting against her back, his smirk louder than his voice could ever be. His hair brushed against her cheek and Y/N found herself spinning around with a scowl on her face.
“Jake,” she stated with discern, her obvious distaste towards him sitting heavily on her brows. His smirk only grew wider, his hand clasping behind his back as he leaned closer to her than before.
In the years that she’d known Henry and Jason Sim, she had grown rather close to them. They accepted her into their family by some sort and she was invited to every dinner they hosted in one of those fancy Chinese or Sushi restaurants- whether she attended or not was up to her. If she did attend though, she would be introduced to guests like she was Henry’s own daughter and Jason had always treated her like a sister by the way he kept her company throughout her years as an intern. Her parents, too, had grown quite fond of the father and son.
Jason and Y/N’s friendship, Henry always used to say, was unexpected. He expected them to work together and get along with each other for the sake of their jobs and business, but he was never expecting the siblingly bond they had created. Oftentimes, the pair would find themselves going out for lunch together during breaks or driving to the beach just for the sake of having some entertainment. They would regularly find themselves at each other's houses in the middle of the night with beers and soju in hopes of having movie marathons. Somewhere in that friendship, Y/N learnt a lot about the missing Sim brother.
He was studying Engineering somewhere in Australia, she learned, and he had only visited his family only a couple of times in all his years of education. There was the one time he flew back to Seoul to spend the New Year with Henry and Jason where she heard he got embarrassingly drunk and broke a glass table. Then there was the other time he visited for Christmas but disappeared within an hour without a word. Speaking of Jake meant hearing stories as such, where he was disrespectful, unexpectable and had no sense of respect. She heard that he once cussed at a shareholder because he was being too nosey.
Y/N had only ever met Jake once. Well, they didn’t exactly meet, she had just seen him passing by in a crowd. It was at another one of Henry’s lavish dinner parties where round tables were cloaked with gold cloth and napkins folded into cranes. Golden chandeliers lit above groups of conversations and amongst one of those stood Jake with overly styled hair and a suit too expensive to be bought with his own money. He was talking to some investors- or business men, she didn’t know- with one hand in his pocket and the other holding a wine glass he languidly sipped on. She was told by Jason that it was one of those rare times Jake didn’t make a scene during a party but she also heard he took a random girl to a hotel room for a one-night-stand, never to call her again.
“You say my name with such loathing,” Jake pointed out, his eyes narrowing as his teeth peeked behind his smirk. “I’d get if my dad and brother talked to me that way, but what did I ever do to you?”
Y/N took a step back, crossing her arms across her chest and tapping her heel lightly against the carpeted floor. She looked at him vexed, her mouth pursing into disinterest. Jake stood back straight, moving his hands into the pockets of his jeans and tilting his head in curiosity. If Y/N didn’t know any better, she would call him a pervert and get him thrown out of the premises by one of the guards just because she wanted to.
“I’ve heard enough stories to make a judgement,” she stated firmly.
“Is that any way to talk to your boss’ son?” He taunted.
“I frankly don’t think he’d care.”
Jake chuckled, lowering his gaze to his feet and shaking his head. His smile was bright, the crystalline waters that surrounded them reflecting on his face. A HammerHead shark from the tank behind him swam across him, followed by a Sting Ray and those animals held more of her attention than he did. “Sorry we got off on the wrong foot, Y/N,” he said and sauntered away from her, assuming he was making his way towards his father’s office. Her eyes followed him but she looked away when he glanced at her from over his shoulder. Clearing her throat, she found herself walking towards another floor of the aquarium.
Jason was right, she thought, his accent really is annoying.
Instead of the tunnel she was observing before, she was now in a fairly confined room with rectangular fish tanks one over the other, covering the span of all four walls, apart from the door. In the tanks were miniscule jellyfish that were soon to be moved to one of the larger tanks for the public to gush at. Of all the places in the aquarium, this room was probably the one she visited the most. Not because it was her favourite or anything but rather because these creatures needed most inspection. If the temperature was changed even a little bit or if the water was getting too dirty, there was a chance that a whole batch of these jellyfish would simply disintegrate.
It had happened once before, not under her watch but some other intern, who failed to notice the decrease in temperature in the room. It was a waste of a lot of Henry's money and it was also one of his favourite species that had met their demise. Because of the intern’s mistake, he yelled at him in front of the majority of the other staff and fired him. Since then, Y/N had always been cautious around her work. Perhaps it was why he was always so fond of her- she never knew why.
“Y/N?”
She flinched when she heard Jason’s voice, his head peeking into the room from the small crack of the door.
“What is it with you and your brother scaring me today?” She breathed, her hand placed over her chest.
“You met him?”
“Yeah he was walking down the tunnel, made nice.”
“He annoyed you, didn’t he?”
“Yup.”
“His first impressions are always bad.”
Jason was leading her out of the room, bringing her to the ground floor where she saw tourists and customers flocking towards the ticket booth. If there was one thing about Henry she never understood, it was the fact that he refused to digitalise the ticketing system. In fact, he refused to digitalise many things in the aquarium. He had the physical copy of every research paper published by the The Marine Foundation of Korea and his logs were still done by hand. Technology hates me and I hate technology, he would always say and this mostly stemmed from the incident where he accidentally deleted all his pictures from Google Photos.
“Isn’t an excuse to breathe down my neck,” she argued as he led her to his office.
“Damn.”
“Yeah,” she pressed. “He talked to me like he’d heard of me.”
“Obviously he’s heard of you.”
“No, I mean,” she paused, looking to her side to make eye contact with him. She wasn’t sure how to explain it, so she stuttered and used animated hand gestures to make her point. “Like he knows me.”
“Yeah, well, dad and I talk about you to him all the time.”
“What the hell?”
“In like, a business way,” Jason defended. “He asks how work goes and you sometimes come up in the conversation.”
“And what do you tell him?”
“That you’re good at your job?” He raised his brow, a confused smile meeting her look of disbelief. “Don’t take it the wrong way, he’s honestly probably just jealous.”
“Jealous?”
“Dad trusts you more than him, you know?”
Before Y/N had the chance to respond with a confused remark, perhaps even a puzzled expression, Jason was pushing open the door to Henry’s office and they were met with the sight of Henry sitting on his desk and Jake standing beside him with a grin, leaning towards whatever he was being shown on the monitor screen. Jason and Y/N settled in the chairs on the other side of the desk, the former confidently crossing one ankle over the other knee and the former confused as to why she was there in the first place. Jason had to tug her sleeve to keep her from squirming and looking around confused. There was a moment of silence that passed, Y/N’s gaze zipping between Henry and the tanks his office was surrounded by. Henry murmured to Jake while pointing at his monitor, analysing something Y/N and Jason weren’t aware of. Jake nodded along, pinching at his bottom lip in thought.
“Y/N?” Henry called. She answered with a curious hum, her brows raising. “You’re free next week? Thursday?”
“Yes, why?”
“Well, you know,” Henry brought his attention away from the monitor and towards her, pushing his glasses farther up his nose with his pinky. “I told you about it. An old friend of mine is opening a restaurant with a huge tank. He wants us there on opening night.”
“Oh, right. I remember,” she nodded.
“What, Mr. Bahng didn’t invite me?” Jake stood back straight with his arms crossed, his grin refusing to leave his expression. He looked between his father and brother, only glancing at Y/N once before continuing to tease them.
They, of course, did not find him amusing. “All of us, Jake,” Jason replied with a roll of his eyes.
“Yes, and it’s going to be a rather quiet gathering,” Henry continued. “So I expect you to be on your best behaviour.”
“When have I ever let you down, father?” Jake chuckled; Henry rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Y/N,” Henry looks at her with tired eyes. “He’s got all sorts of fish in his tank, he’s even got a Whale Shark in there-”
“Woah, what?”
“Yeah, I know, it cost a fortune but anyways,” Henry waved off. “He wants to know fun facts- his words, not mine- about all the species he’d got in there so could you be a dear and…?”
“Yeah, no problem,” Y/N grinned and patted Henry's hand that rested on his desk. “Anything but having to socialise with strangers.”
“Can I join her?” Jason chimed, pointing his thumb towards her.
In that moment, Henry glanced between his son and favourite-slash-best employee and they resembled children asking whether they could take a break from studying to watch cartoons. His eyes twitched, thinking that he didn’t want to deal with annoyance other than his younger son. “No,” Henry said. “You’re socialising with strangers. So are you, Jake.”
Jake, who was about to open his mouth to protest with a finger raised in the air, gulped and dropped his hands down to his sides and nodded with pursed lips.
The opening night to Mr. Bahng’s restaurant was a spectacle. What was planned as an intimate gathering turned into a media spectacle. Paparazzi flocked the entrance of the restaurant and bodyguards had to hold back the public as the handsome sons of Henry Sim, the founder of The Marine Foundation of Korea, walked the red carpet. Minor celebrities, a few actors and foreign entertainers attended the evening- some spotted the Jenner Sisters and others hollered at Jason Momoa and Leo DiCaprio. DiCaprio was an old friend of Henry’s- they met through ocean conservation funds and over the years, he had earned a permanent place on Henry’s invite list and vice-versa. Y/N had the pleasure of meeting him once, barely for a few minutes, for a hand shake and to be introduced as the aquarium’s manager and top researcher.
Y/N walked the red carpet with her arm looped with Jason’s, her free hand holding the hem of her sparkly dress in order not to trip in the ruckus. Her hand would occasionally come up to shield her eyes from the camera flashes and Jason had to repeatedly catch her frame because she was tripping on her heels. They were both dreading to see how the paparazzi pictures would turn out the next morning. Jake, on the other hand, walked confidently with a hand in his pocket and the other waving and blowing kisses at everyone. Photographers and netizens were gawking at the Australian engineer graduate, asking for pictures and photographs but ultimately being turned down. He was famously known on the internet for his looks, Prince Charming-like looks and mannerisms. His personality? It was a mystery to all those on the internet, further feeding into delusions of young fan-girls. It was only Jason and Henry that filmed for interviews for the world of marine-biology, often showing up on the news to promote The Marine Foundation of Korea or to talk about their next big break-through in marine sciences.
Henry and Mr. Bahng were the last to walk the carpet- they were the highlight of the event, after all. When they finally entered the restaurant, the glass doors were shut and bolted behind them, bodyguards taking their place in front of the premises like they were protecting The Sphinx. What was inside the restaurant might as well be as valuable as The Sphinx- there were barely any lights to illuminate the subtle interiors of the restaurant. Circular tables spanned the floor, glass windows towering the walls for the public to see inside if it weren’t for the black curtains. Everything else was painted black, too- the walls, the tables, the black marbled floors. The tank however… The tank glowed blue, just like the tanks in the aquarium. It spanned the entirety of one of the four walls in the restaurant. Schools of fish swam by, accompanied by Stingrays, Hammerhead and Leopard sharks. A lone Mola Mola swam by, its eye holding a vacant stare as it scanned the spans of the restaurant on the other side of the glass.
The showstopper, however, would only make its presence when Y/N finally made her way towards the exhibit. Her heels clicked against the black marble, one hand holding the hem of her dress and the other clutching her purse. The loose strands that fell from her hair up-do fanned her shoulders and just as her bangs bristled her eyes, the Whale Shark swam past the tank. It glided effortlessly across the water, its massive and speckled body moving with a hypnotic grace, throwing Y/N into a trance. She stood in awe, eyes scanning for when she could see it again, acting like she didn’t see Whale Sharks everyday in the aquarium. It was the ambiance of the restaurant that made the tank more mesmerising, if she had to be honest. She’d never seen anything like it.
Jake didn’t get a chance to admire the premises yet, sucked into meeting the guests and investors with his father and brother. When he found a chance to slip away, he made his way to the bar and ordered himself a double shot of whiskey. He promised himself that it would be his first and last drink, remembering his promise of behaving for the night. The last time his father brought him to a public gathering, which was almost two years ago, he almost set the venue on fire and broke a glass table. Scowling at the memories he dug up, he took a seat on a black stool at the bar, wandering his eyes around the guests and seeing men and women of power mingle in unexpected cliques. Finally, his gaze landed on the tank, the main attraction of the night, its hue misting the ambience and painting his skin in a sparkling blue. He admired it, watching the Whale Shark languidly make its way back and forth across the tank, sucker fish clinging onto its skin and a lone Leatherback Turtle following it.
Eventually, his eyes dragged towards the far corner of the restaurant where he found the back of Y/N’s silhouette. She, too, was admiring the tank. Gripping his glass of whiskey, he made his way towards her, a sly smile gracing his lips and the whites of his eyes twinkling brighter with the blue hue. As he walked closer, he could make out the familiar color of her dress that he spent the whole limo-ride staring at. It was a sparkly blue and silver dress, thin straps that barely held the dress up her bust. Her hair was put up in a messy bun, two hair pins with silver sea turtles holding it in place. Her earrings matched her hair pins and her heels matched the silver of her dress. The blue hue colored her skin and he swore he was looking at a still-life painting.
“Where’d you get the dress from?”
Y/N looked over her shoulder to catch Jake’s smirk that she learned to despise through Jason’s anecdotes. The smirk that led to his many one-night-stands, his smirk that led to all the decisions that made his father angry at him, the smirk that led to disasters was the same smirk that was walking towards her. Her serenity pulled into annoyance and Jake could see it in her eyes, her brows wrinkling and her lips sneered.
“Hey, I’m just playing nice,” he offered, trying his best to shrug and surrender his motivations. He took another sip of his whiskey, keeping his gaze fixed on her expression.
Y/N turned her body to face him and now, his eyes were wandering down her frame, staring at all the curves of her body that her dress showed off, just as he did in the limo. “It’s an old dress, I wear it a lot,” she admitted. Then, she knocked a nod towards the glass in his hand. “Let me guess, fifth drink of the night?”
“Come on, the night just started,” he rolled his eyes, the gnarly smirk refusing to leave his expression. “It’s my only drink of the night. Promised dad I’d behave, remember?”
“Right,” she swallowed. The hand that was holding the hem of her dress moved to clutch her purse, both her hands pressing into stomach. A water came around with a tray of appetizers, ironic that it was all seafood. Jake finished his drink and handed the empty glass to the waiter, taking two pieces of appetizers- one for him and one for Y/N.
Silence engulfed them as they stood side by side, both now facing the tank and staring at the creatures and coral spanning across her, the only sound being the loud swishes of the water and their chewing. Y/N was not staring to admire anymore; she was staring to distract herself from the awkward presence, to pass time in any way that she could.
“Aren’t you supposed to be socialising?” Y/N asked, hoping he’d realise and leave.
“I’d rather stare at this than socialise,” Jake said, both his hands digging into his trousers.
He wasn’t sure what stories his father and Jason fed Y/N about him for her to hold onto her negative impression of her. She probably thought he hated his family’s line of work, to read about water and the ocean beds and fish all day. In reality, he loved marine biology, he truly did. But he wasn’t going to apologize for not seeing it as his career. Jake still went to the aquarium of every city he would visit, spent time reading the articles and journals his father published and watched marine documentaries in his free time. He even had a small fish tank in his apartment back in Australia- he had two Firefish Goby and two Cardinalfish. He loved marine biology so much, he specialised in marine engineering. He wasn’t sure if Y/N knew that.
“Can I ask you a question?” Jake turned to her. She raised her brows in curiosity, coaxing him to continue. “Why this?”
“What?”
“I mean, why this?” He pointed at the fish tank just as the Whale Shark swam past them again. “Fish tanks, standing in one place, staring, the aquarium. Why, when you could have gone to bigger research centers like in Hawaii, or something?”
Jake almost regretted asking the question when he saw the expression on Y/N’s face turn solemn. She brought her bottom lip between her teeth, chewing as though she was chewing her brain to find him the answer to his question. Not so she could give it to him but because she wanted to give it to herself. Why? She asked herself that, too.
“I don’t know, Jake,” she sighed. “It seemed right at the time and… I guess, I just didn’t know? Who would pass up an opportunity to work with Henry Sim, you know? He chose me. And I’m not saying I regret it, I’ve found family in him and Jason but I ask myself why, too. I miss being out on the waters.”
Ignoring all that she said about his father and brother, knowing it would trigger him, he smirked at her again. He knew how she felt, it was the same thing Jason used to tell him a few years ago. As mesmerising as aquariums were, being out in the sea and seeing marine creatures in the wilderness is like cutting to a surgery intern. Jake had only gone on an ocean expedition once his whole life. His father took him during high school while he was applying for universities in hopes of changing his mind about his major. Jake remembered loving it, being enamored and lost in what the ocean had to offer, to witness its mystery with his own eyes. But unfortunately for his father, it still wasn’t enough to replace his love for engineering.
“I get it,” he assured her. “Don’t worry though. It won’t be this way for long.”
Before Y/N could ask what he meant, to make him elaborate, they heard Henry hollering their names from across the restaurant. He was waving their hand at them, Jason standing beside him sulking in boredom. Jake and Y/N speed-walked towards him, joining him at the table along with a scholar of jellyfish biology.
“Bahng is going to give his speech soon. Sit,” Henry told the pair.
Mr.Bahng’s speech went on for longer than most would like. He stood in the middle of the room with a drink raised in the air, thanking his family, friends and colleagues for making his dreams come true. His daughter stood beside him, trying to calm his influenced-state but it had all only turned into a comical predicament. Y/N caught Jake eyeing the daughter, knowing she must have been one of his old conquests. Most women she knew of her age who ran in the same circles were all probably one of Jake’s old conquests. She wasn’t going to shame these women, she understood the appeal- the wide smile, the sparkling eyes, the smooth hair and dashing facial features. However, she wouldn’t miss a chance to shame Jake, especially around Jason.
Sick and bored of it all, Jason signaled to Jake to grab a drink with him at the bar. As the pair stood up, leaving Y/N alone with Henry and the jellyfish scholar, Henry questioned the pair.
“No more drinks for Jake,” he warned.
“One more can’t hurt. I’m fine,” Jake defended himself, only to be met by an eye roll and a wave of his hand, telling them to go away and come back soon.
The brothers ordered whiskey for themselves. They’ve been told all the men in their family were whiskey enthusiasts. So is their father- apart from the phase he had when he was an angry drunkard, hammered with cheap beer and vodka most of the nights. Now that it had subsided, he was back to whiskey and that too, only rarely.
“Have you not told Y/N yet?” Jake asked his brother as they settled down onto the tall stools. By then, Mr. Bahng’s speech had ended and the room erupted in small talk again. Y/N’s ears were probably being ripped off by the jellyfish scholar but knowing her, she was definitely enjoying the conversation.
“Told her what?” Jason looked at him with utter confusion.
“The research team? Summer expedition?” Jake tried jogging his memory.
“Oh, right!” Jason nodded, sipping on his drink and hissing when an ice cube touched his teeth- it was a pet peeve he’s had since he was young, but he loved the taste of cold beverages. “We wanted to surprise her. Dad knows how much she’s been waiting for this so we’re gonna tell her on a better day.”
“Oh, God. I was on the verge of telling her,” Jake frowned.
“But she doesn’t suspect anything, right?”
“Nope, not a thing.”
“Crisis averted, then!” Jason assured him. “Dad and I are still figuring out how to tell her. Got any ideas?”
“She hates me, I’m sure she doesn’t want to hear any good news from me,” Jake chuckled.
“Y/N doesn’t hate you,” Jason Looked at him baffled and confused, mouth pulled upwards in surprise.
Jake scoffed. “Yes,” he said. “She does. And it’s because of the crap you and dad feed her.”
“Jake, she doesn’t hate you. I know when Y/N hates someone and she doesn’t hate you,” Jason chuckled. “She’s just a bit apprehensive of you and I don’t blame her. You’re a character-”
“Thanks, man-”
“And she takes time with certain people. To be fair, people like you aren’t her scene.”
“I’m not her scene? The fuck does that mean?” Jake laughed, finishing the last of his drink.
“Jake, you’re the drink and let’s party kinda person. She’s not. She likes peace and quiet and books and fancy sofas to sit on. She’s just quiet, dude. Give her time.”
“Yeah, fair enough,” Jake rolled his eyes.
Just then, Y/N found her way to Jason’s side, the click of her heels stopping at the stool beside him. She had an annoyed expression on her face, her eyes tired and almost lifeless. “Your dad’s calling. We’re going home,” she deadpanned and turned to walk away, the hem of her dress in one hand as her hips swayed with more vigour. She was sleepy and tired and if the limo didn’t drop her off at home, she was going to crash in Jason’s bed.
Sunlight danced across the crests, water stretching endlessly into a mosaic of light and motion. Gentle swells rolled beneath the research vessel while occasional whitecaps broke against the hull of the boat. Y/N lay stretched on the warmed deck, salty breeze tickling her stomach and bringing frizzy curls to her hair. Clad in a striped bikini, she left little to the imagination. It was an early morning for her, seagulls mulling over the Indian Ocean and skies still painted with a pink hue. Everyone on the team was still asleep and she took the opportunity to seize the morning.
The first person to wake up was Sunghoon, one of Jake’s friends, who happened to be an oceanographer and drone operator. He studied ocean currents and temperature changes and learned how to pilot drones in order to collect data on plankton blooms. Without him, the entire whale research expedition would be impossible. Sunghoon greeted Y/N with a drowsy smile, clad in only a pair of shorts himself, taking in the morning sunlight.
Following him was Jay, one of Jason’s friends, who was a cetologist and acoustic analyst. He was rubbing a towel against his wet hair, waving at Y/N who started to put on her shirt out of a slight insecurity that crept onto her cheeks. Behind him, Jason and Heeseung joined with plates of toasted bread and a carton of orange juice. Jason threw a piece of bread towards Y/N and she swiftly caught it, thanking him for breakfast.
Heeseung was known as a young prodigy in the field, perfecting his skills in steering and working as the boat captain and field technician. Jake, too, came aboard as a field technician- a marine engineer himself. In fact, If it weren’t for Jake, Henry Sim would probably have never agreed to this whale research expedition in the first place. Jake wanted to test out new equipment that was hitting the market and who better to test the equipment than The Marine Foundation of Korea? It took a lot of convincing and buttering up his father to convince, yet here he was, heading an entire project by himself with some of his closest friends. If Y/N had squinted hard enough at the predicament, this was basically a vacation for a bunch of fish nerds.
She sat on the deck with her legs brought to her chest, chewing on the soggy piece of bread and watching as Jake finally made his way towards the group of boys with a bowl of scrambled eggs in his hand. Vaguely, she could hear Sunghoon say, “your father must finally be proud of you,” and Jason circling back with a sarcastic comment. It made the group rumble with laughter and Y/N felt herself cracking a smile too.
It was probably around three months ago when Jason and Henry broke the news to her. She was coming back from having a measly lunch at a convenience store nearby and had entered Henry’s office to collect a few files. When she opened the door, Jason and Henry had been waiting for her with a cake in their hands and beaming smiles on their faces. “If you’d walked in any later, I would have started eating this thing without you,” Jason chuckled at her, pulling out a plastic knife from his pocket.
Y/N looked at the pair with confusion, eyes darting between the greeting brows of Henry and the grinning mouth of Jason. Then, her eyes fell towards the chocolate cheesecake they were holding, the word “Congratulations!” pipped on with melted chocolate. She recognised this cake. It was the same one they’d buy for every one of her birthdays she spent with them over the past five years. However, the absence of “Happy Birthday!” threw her off- also, the fact that it wasn’t her birthday.
“What is this for?” She asked, feeling as though this was almost a mistake. This cake was expensive and she almost felt guilty. “Guys, nothing’s happened,” she widened her eyes, shook her head and waved her hands in front of her to demonstrate no.
“What do you mean, Kkomaya?” Henry chuckled. “You’re gonna be part of a research team. That’s a huge thing to celebrate.”
“What?”
“Yeah.”
Jason handed her a piece of folded paper that was tucked away in his blazer. It read the details of a whale research expedition that would take place during the summer and span into autumn season. Y/N could barely skim through the details when her eyes landed on the plethora of signatures that filled the end of the paper. She recognised Henry, Jake and Jason’s signatures and some of a few government officials that signed off on the research expedition and agreed to fund for it. Right beside Jake’s signature was an empty dotted line, waiting for Y/N’s signature.
“You’re joking,” she gasped.
“Sign it so we can cut this cake and celebrate, Y/N. My hand’s getting sore,” Jason chuckled again.
“Oh, right. Sorry!”
What followed next was a string of excited screams, giggles and jumping around until Y/N finally signed the paper and threw herself into Henry and Jason to hug. Then, they cut the cake and each enjoyed a piece, the rest to be distributed amongst the employees of the aquarium in light of good news. A few moments later, Jake entered the room, coyly making his way towards Y/N to give her a handshake. Since the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening, the pair had developed a healthy rapport. He would visit the aquarium sometimes, bumping into Y/N in the process and making polite conversation. He made efforts to be a little more respectful towards her, packing away his cocky personality only in front of her. She once asked him why he was spending so much time in Korea, leaving his job in Australia and he responded aloofly. She got her answer now.
Now, it was the end of May and Y/N was on a research vessel with an unfamiliar group. Though she spent a week getting to know them before leaving for the expedition, seeing them interact on the deck, throwing around jokes like they’d known each other their whole lives… she wasn’t sure how to act that way. She felt like the odd one out, the loose end. Jake and Sunghoon were childhood friends; Jason and Jay were college friends and Heeseung was Mr. Bahng’s oldest son so Jake and Jason had known of him since they were kids. She’s met him a handful of times before, including the night of Mr. Bahng’s restaurant opening. But she didn’t know him like everyone else did.
“Y/N!” Jason waved for her to come over and she did, lifting herself off the lounging chair and walking towards them. It was their third day together on this vessel and she still wasn’t sure how to approach anyone when they were grouped together. She hated saying it, but she relied on Jason to include her when it came to the socialising side of her work. The practicality, however? She was splendid.
“Today’s the day we need to actually start working,” Heeseung said to her as she approached them. Jason made space between himself and Heeseung so she could stand in the circle with them. “It’s mostly Jay and Sunghoon that’s gotta do the work today, figuring out the equipment and all. Jake and I will help. You and Jason stay in stand by, for now. You can go on dives, get your practice on. Just be careful, make sure one of us is scouting…”
And Heeseung rambled on, eventually moving on to telling Jay and Sunghoon what their itinerary consisted of. Y/N’s eyes wandered off to the ocean, water spanning for miles on end, no land near site. They were in the middle of nowhere- well, not literally. They knew their coordinates. But if their equipment were to damage or if one fell overboard, they were as good as dead. It’s moments and opportunities like these marine biologists spend their lives working towards- what Y/N spent her days waiting for.
“So, that’s final?” Sunghoon started. “Jay and I will get the hydrophones, then?”
“Yep,” Heeseung clasped his hands together and everyone started dispersing, mumbling words of encouragement and affirmations, pumping their fists in the air or clapping to get their spirits up.
Before everyone had the chance to disappear and get their gear prepared, Jason stopped everyone and said, “should we make, like, a group chant sort of thing?”
“Yeah, that’s not happening, mate,” Jake pursed his lips and patted his brother on his chest. Y/N chuckled and the rest of them laughed while walking away to continue their work.
It took Jay and Sunghoon a total of four hours to deploy the five units of hydrophones, both floating and anchored. While diving, they would constantly resurface for air and call for Jake, yelling, “What kind of new technology is this, you twat, I prefer the old ones!” Their anger bubbled, frustrated at the fact that a two hour process was taking them double the time only because of the unfamiliarity. After their fourth complaint, Jake ended up diving with them to help.
Heeseung stayed with Jason and Y/N to help test and calibrate the hydrophones. While they sent test signals, Y/N cursed under her breath, too, telling Jason, “we could have just used the old equipment. This new shit Jake brought us is not user friendly.”
“People thought that about the iPhone but they love it now, don’t they?” Jason offered, hoping to reduce Y/N’s distaste. She could only respond by rolling her eyes.
By the time they were done, the sun had started setting and the divers barely ate food. The trio that stayed on the vessel cooked a heavy dinner with whatever ingredients they had, feeding the divers the second they freshened up. The group assembled on the deck, the same place they were huddling in the morning, with blankets wrapped around their shoulders to shield from the chilly breeze.
“Where’s Jason?” Jake looked around.
“He’s finishing with the final sample recordings. He’ll be up in a bit,” Y/N assured.
Jason came back with six chairs, one for everyone to sit on as they debriefed for the night. Warm water was passed around as conversation fluidly changed from work to personal history. The stars were shining unfamiliarly, a sight Y/N couldn’t get in the city anymore. She was reminded of her father who used to point to the constellations and tell her their names. As a kid, she knew most of them by heart. Now, she was unable to recognise most of the constellations, only being able to pick out a few.
“Add in a bonfire and the night would be perfect,” Jay sighed, shivering as he hugged his blanket tighter.
“Oh, we used to go camping a lot in college,” Jason mused. “Those were the times, man. Young and alive.”
“I’d say you’re living it up right now as well, bro,” Heeseung laughed, referring to their boat that was in the middle of the ocean, whale watching and diving as a part of their job description and getting paid above average.
“True,” Jason scratched the nape of his neck in embarrassment. Jake further made fun of Jason and Sunghoon joined in, throwing pieces of crumpled paper from their notebooks at him.
“Look at the stars, guys,” Heeseung directed everyone’s gaze towards the sky. “You don't have nights like these in the city anymore.”
“I was thinking the same thing,” Y/N nodded. “Gotta take it all in before we leave.”
“We’ve got three months for that, don’t worry,” Sunghoon assured.
“Hey, Y/N, wasn’t your dad an astronomer?” Jason clocked his head. “He used to teach you when you were a kid, where each constellation was?”
“Yeah, how’d you know?”
“You told me, like, a really long time ago.”
“Your dad did physics in college? That’s so cool,” Jake pipped, sitting at the edge of his chair and directing his excited smile at her. He’s always had a habit of becoming excited at the mention of physics and math- the entire reason he went into engineering.
“Do you still remember some of the constellations?” When Heeseung asked, Y/N nodded. “Do tell us,” he encouraged.
Bringing her bottom lip between her teeth, she looked up and squinted her eyes to see if anything looked familiar. “Do you guys see the diamond shape?” She heard everyone confirm with a hum. “That’s The Corvus or The Crow. Dad used to say that the crow was a messenger from the sea.”
”Wah,” she heard Jason and Jay exclaiming as she continued searching.
“Do you see a teapot, perchance? Right there,” Y/N attempted to show them its correct location by pointing and once again, she was met with a group of hums. “That’s The Sagittarius. It contains the center of the Milky Way.”
”Wait, I’ve heard about this,” Jake snapped his fingers, trying to jog his memory. “Didn’t sailors use it to locate the galactic core or something?”
”You’re right, I’m surprised you knew that,” Y/N smirked and tried finding another constellation.
In the background, Sunghoon pondered aloud on what it would be like if he could name a constellation after himself and it brought the group into a laughing fit. Jake, though he laughed with them, kept his gaze on Y/N, admiring the way her nose tilted upwards and gaze reflected the starry sky. Jake, who once picked up a book on astronomy out of sheer curiosity and gave up on reading it due to its lack of logic and mechanics, found himself leering as she explained the stars to everyone.
“Do you guys see the red star? That’s Antares, the heart of The Scorpion,” she explained.
”Wow,” Sunghoon started and snapped towards Jake as though he had a revelation. “Wait, isn’t that your constellation? You’re a Scorpio, right?”
”Yeah, how’d you know?”
”I’ve known you your whole life, asshole. Don’t tell me you don’t know my zodiac.”
”I do, I do!”
”What is it?”
”Sagittarius! I thought about it when Y/N pointed it out, I swear!”
Then started the narration of Jake and Sunghoon becoming friends. Jake’s mother, Vivian, moved into the street that Sunghoon’s parents, Daniel and Emily Park, lived in. Both couples were newly weds, just getting back from their honeymoon. Vivian had already been pregnant with Jason at the time and because her and Emily grew close, she was there the day Jason was born. When their husbands were off to work, Emily would often spend her time with Vivian, taking care of her and Jason. Around a year later, Vivian fell pregnant again and Emily announced her pregnancy exactly a month later.
The two mothers spent all their time together thereafter, going to the hospital for check ups together and supporting each other through pregnancy yoga exercises. With each other's support, they didn’t worry about their husbands working overtime. They even hired a nanny together, shifting between houses to help with household work and with Jason, who was still too young to understand his surroundings at the time.
Jake and Sunghoon were born a month apart, Jake being the older one. Emily was in the hospital while Vivian gave birth and vice versa. Henry and Daniel were in wonder of their friendship- it was like it was out of the movies, utopian for the society they lived in today. It was a good thing the two families found each other in this dog-eat-dog world.
Jake and Sunghoon went to the same schools, same clubs and festered the same hobbies so they could do everything together. Their mothers used to joke that they’d end up falling for the same girl one day. “And what would you do if that ever happened?” Emily used to ask Sunghoon and he would respond with, “boy code- I’ll stay away from her if he likes her and I know he’d do the same for me.” In fact, he did and when a similar situation arose in middle school, neither of them got the girl because they valued their friendship more.
Around the time Jake and Sunghoon were old enough to perceive and build on their imaginations, they started pulling pranks on Jason. It was the nasty ones- like, putting saran wrap on the toilet seat or sticking gnarly notes on his bag before he left for school. Once, they rolled a skateboard into him while he was walking into his bedroom and he fell face first into the floor, breaking his nose and costing his parents an emergency trip to the hospital. Jason and Jake didn’t speak for a full month after that incident.
When Jake and Sunghoon turned sixteen, the Park family started talking about relocating to China. Daniel had better job prospects and he was convinced that his children, Sunghoon and Yeji who were four years apart, would receive better education. “And international exposure is always good for a child,” he’d tell Emily. Sunghoon would argue that he wouldn’t leave the country until college and Yeji would cry about not wanting to leave her friends.
It was around this time that Henry opened The Marine Foundation of Korea and started earning more. Their family moved to a more expensive neighbourhood but that didn’t stop Jake and Sunghoon from spending most of their time together. In fact, when Henry had gone on his drinking spree due to the lawsuits and backlash, Jake would run off to Sunghoon’s house, leaving his poor mother and brother to deal with his scary father. When it came time to decide upon college and careers, Sunghoon sat through arguments with Henry to allow Jake to pursue his passions in engineering.
When Jake and Sunghoon started senior year in high school, Vivian was diagnosed with uterine cancer- stage four. That year was filled with tragedy and character change from Henry. Though they spent a fortune on hospital bills, Vivian’s health rapidly declined. The two families started accepting the fate that was to come and Vivian came to an honorable death. What made the children’s period of grief insufferable was that the tabloids had picked up the event and started bombarding the Sim family with unrelated questions. It made Jake want to run away.
Around that time, Sunghoon’s family did end up relocating to Taiwan where Sunghoon pursued marine biology (being truly inspired by Henry’s work) and Yeji continued her high school education. Jake flew off to Australia to pursue engineering, despite his father’s wishes, and estranged himself from his family. For over a year, Henry and Jason only got updates about Jake from Sunghoon. Eventually, though, the three made peace.
It had been almost a decade since Vivian passed away and over three years since Jake and Sunghoon completed post graduation from living across the world from each other, yet their friendship still ran strong. They called and texted each other religiously, making sure their friendship lived on through whatever they were doing in life. Being on this research expedition was like a dream for the pair- everything had somehow worked out perfectly.
“Do you miss your mom?” Heeseung found himself asking the Sim brothers.
“Yeah, of course,” Jake shrugged and slumped further into his chair. Sunghoon reached over to comfortingly pat his knee and he cracked him a smile.
“I miss her all the time,” Jason said. “I’d like to think she’s in a better place.”
A long time ago, when Jason first told Y/N about how his mother passed away, she noticed that there was never an air of solemness or pity when he spoke about her. It was tragic and unfortunate, but Jason never let that reflect in himself. He always spoke about his mother with confidence or a smile on his face, celebrating her existence as a smart woman and amazing mother. He never let anyone show him pity about the fact that he lost his mother too young. He simply chose to idolise her, keep her alive through his happiness and through his achievements. She realised, after narrating basically his whole childhood, that Jake was the same. When he spoke about his mother, he didn’t let his voice cloud with pity and he described her with love and adoration.
“Isn’t it lucky that you ended up doing marine engineering?” Sunghoon said to Jake.
“I love engineering but I do love the ocean, too. Shit’s in my blood- dad shat on me for no reason,” Jake rolled his eyes and Jason threw back a piece of crumpled paper at him. Annoyed, Jake bounced his leg up and down. “You know what we forgot to mention?”
“What?” Sunghoon asked.
“Do you remember when Yeji had the biggest crush on Jason?”
With that, Sunghoon let out the biggest groan and threw his head back, hiding his face under his hands. Jason leaped at the memory while Heeseung, Jay and Y/N begged Sunghoon to show them a picture of his sister. Jake started scrolling through his phone to see if he could find any.
“What do you say, Jason?” Jake wiggled his eyebrows at his brother.
“Dude, grow up,” Jason rolled his eyes. “She was a kid.”
“Not anymore! Isn’t she, like, working right now, Sunghoon?” Jake teased.
“I’ll actually kill you,” Sunghoon deadpanned.
“I think they’d make a great couple, though!”
“Dear lord, not this again,” Jason groaned. “The four of us talk all the time, we literally have a group chat. Stop making it weird.”
From what Y/N could gather, this seemed like a conversation the three had frequently. Jake would mention the pairing of Jason and Yeji and Jason and Sunghoon would get riled up and throw a fit. Jake would then continue to list down the reasons as to why should start dating for the millionth time and the other two would turn him down for the millionth time. After seeing a picture of Yeji, she understood why Jake said they would make a great pair.
The first time Y/N saw Jason and Jake side by side, she told them that they looked nothing alike. And they truly didn’t- everyone would always be surprised when they told them they were siblings, only one year apart. Jake had stronger features, a sharper nose, defined jawline, almond eyes, thick lips and curtain-like hair. Jason, however, had lighter features with a button nose, round eyes, fluffy hair and puppy-like lips. They were both handsome, there was nothing to deny, just in polar different ways.
“I think this is a sign for us to sleep guys, It’s gonna be early morning for all of us from here on,” Jason announced and was the first to get up.
Everyone followed him to the sleeping pods, six beds fitted to the walls like bunk beds. If they stared hard enough, the room almost looked like a jail-cell but none of them really took it to heart. They wouldn’t be spending much time there anyway. Y/N slept in the bed above Jason’s and Jake slept opposite to her. That night, she found herself drifting off to sleep while desperately trying to focus on his features, the softness of his expression as he slept.
“This is our first drone test,” Heeseung announced and Sunghoon planted himself beside him with the drone and controller in hand. It had almost been a week since they deployed the hydrophones and it took them a week to perfect how to use them. Improvements were going slower than expected but a majority of the reason for this expedition was to test the new equipment so they learned to not complain as much. Finally, they decided to move on to the next piece of equipment, the drone, that Sunghoon was going to manoeuvre.
“Are we ready?” Sunghoon called. Everyone answered with a hum, dressed in scuba gear in case they needed to dive at the spotting of any whale, they told themselves. In the few days that they were at sea, they found it concerning that they spotted everything but a whale. “Alright, let’s go, then!”
Everyone watched with curiosity, intent and awe as the drone lifted higher into the sky, becoming a speckle of dust to their eyes as Sunghoon controlled it with grace. Jason monitored its camera through his laptop, paying close attention to anything that it could capture. They all stood around watching the screen for around ten minutes, Sunghoon still standing at the edge of the doc as he controlled the drone.
When the fifteenth minute came around, everyone started to lose hope, dispersing to do their respective work with grumbles and sighs. The twentieth minute came around and Jake asked Sunghoon if the new version of the drone was better than the hydrophones. He confirmed with a nod, his lips slightly parted as he concentrated his fingers on the controller and his eyes towards the sky where he could still see the drone. Bored, Jason and Y/N started playing thumb wars and Heeseung and Jay started discussing what the next day’s itinerary would be- Sunghoon let out a gasp.
“Guys, look!”
Everyone ran towards the laptop screen and vaguely, they could see the outline of a large fish, slowly gliding through the ocean currents, around twenty feet away from them. It wasn’t blue- a deep brown and grey, rather. It could have easily been a Bryde’s Whale. At this realisation, everyone elated and Jason ran to check if the hydrophones were picking up any sounds or echoes.
“I’ve got nothing,” Jason shook his head.
”What do you mean? Let me check,” Jay took over and after a few seconds of listening, he too concluded the same thing. “Are you sure the hydrophones aren’t glitching again?” He asked Jake.
“No, I’m sure,” Jake assured.
”Guys, it’s not too far from us. You can go check it out,” Sunghoon hollered to everyone, noticing that the silhouette was moving closer and closer towards the vessel.
Within the next ten minutes, Jay, Jason, Jake and Y/N were diving headfirst into the water. The rush of the ocean engulfed Y/N, the cold making her realise that this was her first time diving in the ocean since her semester on sea during college. The past few years, she’d kept in touch by diving in swimming pools and facilities but this… the real thing was always better.
Bubbles streamed past their bodies as they tried cutting through the water, their goggles making everything hazy as they got used to the pressure. At a distance, they could see the silhouette of what they hoped to be a Bryde’s Whale. Sunghoon and Heeseung kept an eye on them through the video the drone was transmissioning.
For a breathless moment, a moment where they all hoped that it was a whale they were finally seeing, they truly believed that they were in luck. However, as they swam closer to the giant body, theyr recognised its gaping mouth, unhurried movements and pointy fins as something else. For a moment, another breathless moment, they were disappointed, weight filling their chest in a way the ocean’s pressure couldn’t crush them. But seconds later, they decided to enjoy their discovery- Y/N, especially. It was fleeting, barely a few seconds, but it felt like something unspoken passed between them in that shared moment.
“Guys, it’s a Basking Shark,” Y/N said. “Heeseung? Sunghoon? Can you hear me?”
“It’s a Basking Shark, alright,” Jay said, his voice crackling through the earphones before Y/N could receive his words.
“You know the rules, guys. No touching, only looking,” Jason reminded them.
The group of four stopped swimming, floating in the blue abyss and watching the Basking Shark’s movements. It opened its mouth to inhale water- its way of catching food. It stayed open that way, allowing them to get a full view of its insides. White and dark stripes disappearing into its stomach. Slowly, slowly, second by second, the shark swam their direction, as calm as the wind and ocean before a storm. The divers moved to stand out of its way as it swam past them.
“How many feet do you think it is?” Jake asked.
“This is a big one,” Jay said. “I think 30, maybe 33 feet.”
Y/N knew the answer to this question. Normally, she would be the first person leap at answering. But she was too enamoured by the creature as it swam between them, momentarily making her lose sight of Jay and Jason who were on the other side. She could still see the bubbles floating upwards from their breathing. In a moment of poor judgement, she let her fingers raise to inch closer to the fit on the shark, eyes sparkling with eagerness and anticipation. What would it feel like? What would she feel?
As her fingers reached out, inches away from the shark’s rough skin, she felt a hand wrap around her wrist. Startled, she swung her head around to find Jake’s eyes staring daggers at her. Through his mask, she saw him shaking his head. They hovered that way, his hand on her wrist, eyes moving away from each other and towards the shark, watching it drift away from them and the vessel.
The group made their way back to surface, hearts beating with exhilaration. Sunghoon and Heeseung stretched out their arms to help everyone up, fighting the heaviness of the water. “That was amazing,” Jay enthralled as he ripped his mask off.
The other three settled on the deck, backs slumping onto the railings of the vessel as they heaved to catch their breaths. Their masks were thrown beside them and their wetsuits slipped down their torsos. Jake ran his hands through his hair, trying to restyle its shape; Jason forced himself to stand up so he could make his way to the shower; Y/N sat there, unmoving, staring at her bare hands like she’d just woken up from an unbelievable dream. Then, she lifted her head to look at her surroundings, meeting her gaze with Jake as her head turned. He cracked a smile at her and she turned away, embarrassed.
Nine days. It had been nine days since the Basking Shark incident and they were nowhere close to seeing a whale- Blue Whale, Humpback Whale, Sperm Whale… nothing. There was a moment where Jay was convinced he’d picked up the sounds of whales singing but the noise ended up being interference from debris. However, it wasn’t to say that nothing good came out of the past empty days.
The equipment they were testing had come around wonderfully. Everyone, with due time and patience from Jake, started learning how to use the technology and were on their way to perfecting the techniques. One day, a curious Green Sea Turtle surfaced next to the vessel and stared at them for a full minute before diving away. While hauling one of their retrieval baskets, they realised they'd caught an Isopod and it made Heeseung recoil in horror due to its eerie similarity to cockroaches- that day, they found out Heeseung had a huge phobia of insects. Y/N caught a glimpse of a pod of flying fish through her binoculars. Jake caught a glimpse of a Thresher Shark while everyone else was in the lab and he had headed up for some fresh air.
Sunghoon seemed to be some sort of octopus whisperer. A few days ago, he’d spotted a tiny translucent octopus stuck to the side of the vessel and he stretched himself to reach it. It was small enough to fit on his pinky and wrap its tentacles to cover his fingerprint. It was almost transparent, apart from specks of pigment that floated in its body like dust. Its body pulsed softly in his hand, delicate tentacles fanning out onto his palm to test the surface. Then, he slowly lowered it back to the water. On one of their dives, Sunghoon spotted a Blanket Octopus, a rare sighting that would get the media riled up when the footage was released, and he swam after it until he was too far from the vessel.
That morning, Jay woke up to the sight of a pod of dolphins swimming past the vessel, jumping into the air to create dark outlines onto the orange and pink sky. The rhythmic splash of their bodies against the water seemed to stir the rest of the crew from their sluggish morning routines. One by one, they emerged onto the deck—first Jason, then Heeseung and Sunghoon, followed by Y/N and Jake. The usual grumbles of early wake-ups were quickly replaced by soft gasps and murmured excitement as they took in the sight before them.
“That’s what I call a wake-up call,” Y/N gasped.
“Maybe that’s a sign of luck, guys,” Jay offered. “We should do something tonight.”
“Like what?” Sunghoon asks.
Jay perked up. “Like a night dive?”
Sunghoon, who had been taking a sip of water, nearly choked. “Diving?” He coughed. “At night?”
“Why not? We’ve been out here for weeks, and we haven’t done one yet,” Jay reasoned. “The bioluminescence, the different marine life—it’d be an entirely new experience.”
Jason nodded in agreement. “Plus, it’ll be a good change of pace. We’ve been so focused on the whales that we haven’t really taken in everything else around us.”
Heeseung, ever the cautious one, sighed. “You do realize diving at night is way riskier, right? Low visibility, stronger currents—”
“We’ll take precautions,” Jay cut in. “We’ve got the lights, safety lines, and we won’t go too far from the vessel. It’s a controlled dive, not some reckless plunge.”
A moment of silence passed as Heeseung weighed the risks, scanning the eager faces around him. Finally, he exhaled through his nose and shook his head. “Fine. But if anything even remotely goes wrong, we call it and get out. No heroics.”
A round of nods and murmured agreements followed.
“Then it’s settled,” Jay grinned. “Tonight, we dive.”
Excitement buzzed like static as the sun dipped below the horizon. The group prepared for their night dive with thick dive suits and dive computers strapped to their wrists. Jason, ever meticulous, went through each regulator one by one, testing for air flow. "If your regulator sputters, switch to your alternate immediately and signal me," he reminded the group.
Sunghoon handed out waterproof dive torches while Jay and Heeseung secured backup glow sticks to their vests, just in case their primary lights failed. “If it gets too dark, stick close and don’t panic,” Jay advised. “This is a controlled dive, no one goes deeper than 30 meters. Stay within sight of your buddy at all times. If anyone gets separated, stop where you are, shine your light upwards, and wait for us to find you. Do not ascend alone unless it’s an emergency.”
Jay paired with Jason, Sunghoon paired with Heeseung and, like fate had it, Y/N paired with Jake.
Slowly, they approached the edge of the deck, staring down at the ink-black water, the reflection of the stars rippled into infinite nothingness and for a moment, just for a moment, they felt themselves regretting their decision, letting fear conquer their senses. Sunghoon looked at Heeseung, panic and fear glistening against his eyes. Jake, catching his expression from the other end, assured him with a thumb raised in the air and adjusted his mask.
“We got this, guys,” Jake announced, trying to lift everyone’s spirits. “It’s gonna be an experience of a lifetime.”
As the words left his lips, Y/N’s gaze lifted to meet his through the hazy plastic of her mask, her lashes fluttering as hesitation creased her brow. Even through the dim glow of their dive lights, she could see the warmth in his eyes, the way his expression softened—like he was seeing only her in the vastness of the ocean. Then, as if drawn by an unspoken pull, his fingers brushed against her wrist before slipping lower, finding her hand with effortless ease. Slowly, deliberately, he wove his fingers through hers, his grip gentle yet certain. Her breath hitched as she glanced down at their hands—at the way they fit, tethered in the silent depths—before letting her gaze drift back up to him. He wasn’t looking away. He held her there, in the weightless moment suspended between them.
“Just stick with me, yeah?” He whispered to her. “I promise it’ll be the best time of your life.”
“Alright, everyone,” Jay hollered. “Everyone dive in three… two… one.”
What followed were a sequence of splashes and bubbles rising to the surface of the water due to the impact. The first thing they saw was blackness, their eyes still adjusting to the minimal light of their flashlights. As they splashed around, disturbing the calmness of the water, they saw specks of blue- little emeralds glistening at their friction.
“It’s plankton,” Y/N squealed. “It’s bioluminescence!”
“Can’t get better than this, huh?” Jake squeezed her hand, tuning out the excitement everyone else was emulating.
“This is unreal,” Heeseung moved his hand to trigger another spark of bioluminescence, mesmerized by the living light show.
As they descended further, with patience and caution, they saw the silver body of a Barracuda flash by. Startled, Y/N moved closer to Jake, wrapping her wrist around his bicep. Jason, Jay, Heeseung and Sunghoon had moved deeper and the pair followed, eyes spotting clusters of coral reefs with their blooming polyps. From the reef emerged a biofluorescent Hawksbill Sea Turtle, snapping its mouth open and closed in hopes of finding prey. It moved languidly through the water, ignorant of the divers coming closer to it.
“Didn’t think we’d see this today,” Jason said. “Biofluorescence is common in corals and sharks but it’s only been seen in turtles around 2015. Take it in, everyone.”
As everyone tried keeping their eyes on the turtle, already on the verge of leaving their sight, Jay signals everyone to look towards a rocky outcrop. A flash of pale white flickering into deep brown and they hover in place, watching as a cuttlefish pulsated with shifting hues, blending seamlessly into the seafloor before striking at an unsuspecting shrimp. Just a few feet away, a small octopus stretched its arms along the coral, its skin rippling from sand-colored to a deep maroon as it crept toward its prey.
Y/N, captivated, gestured excitedly at the display, her bubbles rising in bursts. Jake caught her expression and grinned behind his mask, watching as she pressed closer to the scene, eyes wide with childlike wonder. Sunghoon, playing the photographer, raised the underwater camera to capture the display of nature’s most skilled shapeshifters. When the creatures finally retreated into the shadows, the group exchanged excited looks before continuing their dive.
As they moved deeper, the ocean’s silence felt heavier, interrupted only by the sound of their own breathing. It felt like they were in a sharksploitation film, the Jaws background music being the only thing missing. As though Y/N’s thoughts were being read, Jason, who had been slightly ahead, froze and pointed his light downward in a startled haze.
Whatever it was that caught Jason’s attention, it was huge and left a trail of bioluminescence in its wake. They could feel it looming just beyond the reach of their lights. A ripple of tension passed between the group as an immense shadow suspended in the water. No one moved- they were sure not one of them was breathing.
Jay’s fingers curled around his dive knife out of instinct, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. Heeseung, usually calm, hovered frozen in place, his eyes darting between the dark shape and Sunghoon, who was holding onto his camera for dear life. Jake exhaled slowly, bubbles escaping in a steady stream as he tried to make sense of what they were seeing, Y/N clinging to his arm to comfort herself. Steadily, Jason tightened his grip on his flashlight and angled the beam forward. The light cut through the darkness, catching the edge of something vast and smooth. The shape shifted, its outline rippling like a ghost emerging from the abyss.
It was a Manta Ray.
At the realisation, their muscles loosened and Jay kept his dive knife away. They watched it swarm past them, its wings stretching impossibly wide. Just like a ghost, it glided through the water like it owned the place, its pale underbelly flashing in the light. It moved like a specter, unbothered by their presence, its cephalic fins unfurling like delicate ribbons as it turned. With the added effects of the blue bioluminescence, it felt like they were watching a dream. Y/N say them all the time in the aquarium but to see them alive, gliding in their natural habitat, was a different kind of sight.
“How big do you think that is?” Jay murmured.
“Five meters?” Y/N answered. “Easily six… she’s huge.”
Jake felt Y/N’s grip on his arm loosen and like instinct, he turned towards her in. He was met with the sight of her in awe, watching the Manta Ray disappear into the void. As they hovered in awe, Heeseung was the first to react. He gestured frantically, his flashlight beam cutting through the water and landing on something just below them. His wide eyes and rapid pointing sent a jolt of confusion through the group. Jay followed the direction of Heeseung’s light, angling his own beam downward.
A Vampire Squid.
It wasn’t supposed to be here. These creatures lived far deeper, in oxygen-minimum zones, not a mere 20 meters below the surface. Yet there it was, its deep crimson body illuminated in their lights, its webbed arms curling inward as it drifted.
Jason exhaled a string of bubbles, exchanging a stunned glance with Jay. Y/N's mind raced—was it sick? Disoriented? Had something forced it to the surface?
Before they could react, the squid suddenly pulsed its body, releasing a shimmering cloud of bioluminescent mucus—a defense mechanism against predators. Tiny blue specks scattered around it like an underwater firework before the creature vanished into the blackness.
The team remained frozen, the eerie afterglow of the squid's defense lingering in the water.
“What the hell was that doing up here?” Jason finally asked through their comms. No one had an answer.
“I’m not getting a good feeling from this,” Heeseung announced. “We’ve seen plenty. I think it’s time to go.”
With steady nods and eager movements, they swam back toward the vessel, an unspoken unease settled between them. A buzz of confusion filled their dialogue when they broke the water and fatigue settled into their bodies. Some looked back at the Manta Ray and awed, others still concerned about why they saw a Vampire Squid so far up the surface, questioning if they should be worried. Jason theorised that it was probably nearing its life-cycle; from what he could see in the passing moments, it looked quite old.
In practiced silence, they stripped off their gear. Masks clattered onto the deck. Wetsuits peeled away with sluggish motions. Someone yawned. One by one, they disappeared below deck—some for a quick shower, others just to sit and breathe.
Y/N, clad in her bikini and a flimsy shirt, found herself sitting on the edge of the deck, her bare feet skimming the water. Each ripple sent a flicker of blue light swirling around her toes—the bioluminescence responding to her every movement. She could hear the guys deep in a conversation on the other side of the deck, discussing the next morning’s regime. She didn't listen in. She just watched the reflection of the stars, absentmindedly swirling her foot through the water, watching the glow chase her movements.
Then, footsteps. She didn’t have to look to know who it was. The air around them shifted as Jake settled beside her, resting his forearms on his knees. For a moment, neither of them spoke, just watching the light dance beneath them. She could see him pouting from the corner of her eyes, a habit she noticed in him before they even started the research expedition.
“Dinner?” She asked, not breaking her gaze away from whatever was in front of her.
He turned to look at her, damp hair falling in front of his forehead. “Yeah, yeah,” he nodded.
“Hey, I have a question,” Y/N found herself chuckling before she could ask him. Slowly, she turned to look at her, shifting her position so that she could lean back on the palms of her hands. “Heeseung doesn’t know you hooked up with his little sister, does he?”
At the question, Jake found himself cackling, too. “What?” He laughed. “No way,” he shook his head. “I think he’d murder me.”
“Yeah, he definitely would,” Y/N agreed. Then, she let a moment of silence pass between them, mustering up the courage to ask him her next question. “What is it about hookups with you, anyway? Just… why so many?”
“Is that who you think of me as?” Jake’s chuckle never left, his eyes widening as he continued. “We just came back from that… interesting dive and you wanna talk about this?”
“It was a bit scary,” she admitted. “I loved it, but I don’t wanna think about it until tomorrow.”
“Fair, fair. Alright, I’ll indulge you,” Jake bit his lip- another one of his many habits- and allowed his gaze to meet hers.
In that moment, in a fleeting split second, the wall that Jake built to keep caution around her had crumbled. All these months, Jake spent trying to be respectful around her, walking on eggshells to try and gain her respect. And somewhere along the way, she started looking at him like he was his own person- not the annoying little brother Jason complained about and not the disappointing son Henry seethed about. She could see the effort he put in, not only for his work or his family, but also for her. She wasn’t sure why. She almost missed his cocky demeanour.
“I don’t know why you’re so against it-”
“I’m not against it,” Y/N defended. “I’m just not that kind of person.”
“Right,” he breathed. “But I guess… well, I suppose I should begin from where it all started,” at that, Y/N chuckled and nodded to coax him to continue. “So, it was the second semester at college and as usual, I was at some house party. By this time, I’d lost my virginity in high school and everything, right? But I hadn’t really slept with anyone in college. So that night, I met this girl- really pretty, really flirty-”
“And you slept together.”
“And we slept together,” he said. “And me, being the fool I was,” Y/N continued laughing, finding his narrative style quite comical. “Thought that maybe she wanted me to call her the next morning. But apparently she didn’t want that. And nineteen year old Jake was heart broken-”
“And he started going to the gym, came out a cocky ass and started sleeping with everyone because some random girl broke his heart-”
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t make fun of me,” Jake nudged her side, leading her to continue laughing. Her eyes struggled to stay open and her smile refused to die. Jake bathed in her joy. “And to be fair, I started going to the gym in high school,” he pointed a finger at her.
“Yeah, okay, whatever,” she grinned and rolled her eyes.
“But, yeah, anyways,” he continued. “I was hurt by it, obviously. And then I told my friends about it and they were all assholes, by the way. Not the kind you want to have long term relationships with. But, yeah, I told them and they kinda brainwashed me into thinking that I got lucky that this was a no strings attached thing. And to be honest, a few days later, I kinda liked the whole idea, too, I guess? And the party I went to after that- hooked up with another girl. And I guess, the cycle just continued.”
Y/N blinked at him for a second, bringing her bottom lip between her teeth. “No one gets hurt?”
“No one gets hurt,” he assured with a shake of his head.
“How would you know, though?” She asked. “The girl in the context- what if-”
“You just kind of know,” he breathed. “You always kinda know. It’s like a sixth sense… only hook up with people you’re sure who want the same things as you. But don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I don’t ever want to settle down. I mean- I’m pushing thirty. It’s just that… I don’t think I’ve found anyone yet.”
Y/N hummed. “The sex is that good?”
Jake’s grin returned, this time a little mischievous, dangerous. His eyes had a sparkle in them, his pointy teeth peeking behind his smile. “Y/N, the sex…” he rumbled, voice low and breath fanning against her ear. He leaned closer to her. “You wouldn’t believe it.”
Y/N gulped.
Assuming his previous position, his grin still plastered on him, he looked her up and down, taking in the tips of her toes that were still touching the water and running his gaze back to her eyes. Perhaps he was being delusional, clouded by the conversation they were having, but he was sure he saw the spark in her- the spark that manifested through her hooded eyes and flushed cheeks. He could see her squeeze her legs together, nails digging into her palms as she chewed her bottom lip. Her gaze stayed on his hands- his hands that were pulsating with his veins, fingers long enough to wrap her around him.
“Don’t tell me you’ve never-”
“No, I have- Jake, I’m pushing thirty, too,” she rolled her eyes, shaking herself out of her daze. A cool wind breezed past them and she could feel her nippled perking through her shirt- she was sure Jake had noticed. “Dated this guy a couple years ago. I met him as a customer in the aquarium, actually. We dated for, like, a year. The sex was good. Jason hated him, though. Said he acted like a frat boy and looking back, I guess he kinda did.”
Watching her shrug and look away, he licked his lips. His breath was near her neck now, his presence ghosting against hers. “Y/N, you deserve better than good sex- whatever that was.”
“And you’re some expert on sex?” She teased.
They didn’t know when the air between them had changed.
Maybe it had started in that moment- when the world was nothing but rolling waves and flickering bioluminescence. Maybe it had started long before that, slipping in between stolen glances across the vessel, lingering eye contact that lasted just a second too long, and quiet moments between chaos that neither of them dared to name.
They’d be lying if they said there was absolutely no tension building between them over the past few weeks. It had been there, simmering just beneath the surface, waiting.
It was in the way he always seemed to be nearby—not in an obvious way, but in a way that made it impossible for Y/N to ignore. If she was adjusting equipment, Jake was there, his arm brushing against hers as he reached for something. If she was rinsing off after a dive, he’d pass by, running a towel through his hair, his skin damp and glistening with seawater. It was the way she felt his presence before she even saw him.
It was the way their bodies gravitated toward each other—shoulders bumping when they worked side by side, fingers grazing when they passed tools back and forth. The way she’d instinctively reached for him during dives, her hand wrapping around his forearm in the darkness, trusting his steadiness as they maneuvered through the water. It was the way he never pulled away.
Maybe it was the way his eyes lingered on her lips when she spoke, or the way she caught herself staring at his hands—the way they moved, the way they curled into fists when he was frustrated, the way they rested so naturally on his neck when he was deep in thought.
It was everything.
Slowly, silently, inevitably, it had been building up to this moment.
Jake found himself hoisting himself back on his feet, rubbing his hands against his thighs to brush off any dust. “I’m gonna try sleeping,” he said, ignoring the laughter that the rest of the boys started filling in the air. Yet, he didn’t move, eyes fixated on her and the way she seemed to curl further into herself. He waited for her to say something- anything that gave him a hint on what was to come next.
“Okay,” she said, finding herself getting back on her feet as well. “I’m gonna sleep, too.”
“Okay.”
The pair stared at each other for a brief second, his eyes darting between her features and hers fixated on his eyes. The air between them was charged with something neither of them dared to put into words. It was a quiet understanding, an unspoken decision made in the space of a breath. Then, with a nod, Jake led her back to the sleeping pods. They moved quickly, their strides quick and deliberate, as if slowing down would give them time to second-guess. Jake barely spared a glance at the others—Heeseung and Sunghoon talking near the railings, Jason and Jay checking something on the equipment—he breezed past them like they didn’t exist.
By the time they reached the sleeping pods, her heart was hammering against her ribs. She watched as Jake stripped off his shirt, catching her widened eyes of shock and explaining to her that he always slept this way. And she watched as he climbed onto his bed, running his hands through his hair and clenching his jaw from what she assumed was frustration. Then finally, finally, after pretending like they weren’t there for a purpose, he looked at her. He looked at her with conviction, slender eyes coaxing her and lips begging for her.
“Y/N…” his exhale spelt out her name.
His rand reached out for her to hold and she looked at his palm- his empty hand that was waiting to be filled with hers, his empty fingers waiting to wrap around her. So, she complied and took his hand, climbing into his bed and adjusting her straddle on his lap. There was silence, mostly just their heavy breaths filling the air, wondering if this was the moment they’d been waiting for- if this is what Jake was hoping for.
She felt his hands creep up her thighs, slowly and surely attaching themselves to her hips, dipping under her shirt to find her waist. His fingers danced on her skin, almost like he was playing a piano, waiting for her to do something other than to hold onto the hem of her shirt.
“Jake?”
“Yeah?”
He could feel her pulsating through her bikini and his dick twitched in his shorts. He gulped as he watched her hands move towards his chest, the cold of her fingertips sending a jolt down his spine. He let her stay that way, her hands exploring the crevices of his chest. Lifting his head that was resting on the wall, he found his neck moving towards her, and she did the same. Their heads tilted, lips parted and eyes hooded- they knew what was to come. They couldn’t wait for it to come.
“I promise you won’t get hurt,” he whispered, just as his lips brushed against hers, their noses touching. His hands moved higher up her torso, touching her ribs just as she let out a ragged breath-
And just as fast as their moment came, it left when they jolted away from each other. They heard footsteps and grumbled murmurs of the rest of the group mumbling it was a good day and goodnight to each other. Panicked, they scrambled off of each other and Y/N was rushing out of his pod and back into her own- anything to make the predicament seem normal, unusual. Before Jay had burst the door open and everyone piled in, Y/N’s head was already on her pillow, pretending to be asleep.
She could hear Jake greeting everyone and wishing everyone a goodnight- she paid no mind. That night, she couldn't sleep.
The group of six had spent almost two months out on the ocean, in the middle of nowhere, on a metal vessel that they’d been calling home, and they’d still hadn’t spotted a whale. However, they felt no sense of discouragement, focusing on testing the new equipment and going on more dives and collecting more samples for research. They collected samples of plankton blooms, recorded the eerie songs of distant marine life, and encountered creatures they never expected—an elusive blanket octopus, a deep-sea jelly drifting near the surface, even a rare oarfish shimmering like a silver ribbon in the depths. The once-crisp excitement of the expedition had softened into something quieter—a steady rhythm of work, patience, and anticipation.
That day was like no other. The air felt no different and the ocean, as usual, stretched infinitely around them. The sky was a perfect, cloudless blue. Jason was at the research station, analyzing the latest data from their dives, his brows furrowed in concentration as he scrolled through results. Sunghoon and Heeseung were near the stern, arguing about whether or not a gull that had landed on their railing was the same one they’d seen three days ago. Annie sat cross-legged on the deck, flipping through her notebook, jotting down observations while absentmindedly twirling a loose thread on her sleeve. Jake was beside her, leaning back on his elbows, quietly watching the sun reflect off the water.
The late afternoon had been slow, peaceful, the kind of moment where time stretched lazily—until Jay stiffened, his head snapping toward the hydrophone. His heart kicked against his ribs as the sound hummed through his headphones, low and distant but unmistakable. Impatient, he holler for Jason who came running to him, questioning what was so important.
“Do you hear that?” He sucked in a breath as he handed the headphones to Jason.
Jason, eyes widened with hope and shock, nodded. “No way,” he breathed. “No way!” He yelled which caught the attention of the rest of the group.
“What is it?” Y/N craned her head to examine the ruckus, watching as everyone had gathered around the deck. Jay came over with binoculars, waving it around in the air. Somehow, without needing any explanation, everyone understood what the excitement was about. It was happening. It was finally happening.
Keeping her notebook aside, she made her way towards the rest of the group, leaning against the railing in anticipation.
“I think they’re a few kilometers away, we should be able to see them soon,” Jay concentrated on his sight through the binoculars, face squirming with concentration.
Everyone simply watched the horizon, waiting for a disturbance to break the surface of the ocean. For a few moments, they saw nothing and Y/N went back and forth from listening to the sound on the headphones, a melody so ancient and otherworldly that it sent shivers down her spine, and looking back at the horizon. She was on the brink of losing hope, watching as Jake and Sunghoon broke apart from the group with their heads hung low, looking at everyone like they were fools for thinking they were lucky until-
It finally happened.
Gasps of awe filled the air as the others scrambled to grab their binoculars and cameras. Sunghoon nearly tripped over a crate in his rush, and even Jake—usually calm and composed—had an unrestrained grin on his face as he followed Y/N to the railing.
A towering column of mist rose into the air, catching the evening light like a shimmering ghost. The sound of the exhale followed a second later, a forceful blast from beneath the waves. The water churned violently as the massive shape surged upward. For a split second, the ocean seemed to hold its breath—then, a whale erupted from the surface. A colossal Humpback Whale launched skyward, water cascading off its slick skin in torrents. The sheer size of it was staggering. Its massive pectoral fins spread wide, and for a breathtaking moment, it seemed suspended in midair—a creature far too large to belong anywhere but the sea, defying gravity itself.
Everyone froze. No one breathed.
Then, in a heartbeat, everyone burst into a rumble of excitement as the whale slammed back into the water, sending an explosion of white foam and waves rippling toward the vessel. The force of it sent their stomachs lurching, but no one cared. Y/N’s hands flew to her mouth, her eyes blown wide.
“Oh, my God,”she said, unable to get her feet to move as Jay had scrambled back to the computer to see what the hydrophones had managed to record. “It’s singing!” Heeseung had screamed repeatedly as Jay fought to not let excitement shake his posture.
Sunghoon bolted for the camera rig, yanking the telephoto lens into place. “Holy shit, that was a full breach! I need a better angle—someone hold this steady!” Heeseung grabbed the tripod as Sunghoon adjusted the settings.
Jason scrambled toward the data log, frantically typing timestamps and environmental conditions into the system. “We need to record the water temp, salinity, GPS coordinates—someone grab the readings!”
As the crew erupted into action around them—rushing for cameras, hydrophones, and data logs—Jake didn’t move. He barely even breathed.
He was watching her.
Y/N stood frozen at the rail, her hands gripping the metal so tightly that her knuckles had gone white. Her eyes, wide and shining under the soft glow of the afternoon sun, stayed locked on the spot where the whale had breached. She looked completely lost in the moment—like the world had narrowed to just her and the ocean. The excitement, the rush, the frantic calls of the others—it all faded into white noise for Jake. He saw her throat move as she swallowed hard, lips slightly parted like she wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. She didn’t even reach for the binoculars or her notebook. She just stood there and let everything happen.
Jake had seen her fall in love with the ocean over and over again these past few weeks. On the night dive, when she saw bioluminescent creatures flicker to life for the first time. In the quiet hours before dawn, when she let her fingers trail through glowing waters. Each moment had stripped away something guarded in her—had pulled her deeper into the thing she loved most.
And now, as she stood there, wholly consumed by the sight before her, Jake felt something in his chest tighten. She was beautiful like this—untethered, weightless, alive. In a moment of fleeting adoration, Jake wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into his chest without hesitation, mouth still agape, eyes still locked on the sea. Jake felt her exhale, felt the way her body melted into his. Slowly, confidently, he pressed a kiss to her forehead. His lips lingered, his eyes closing like he wanted to keep this moment exactly as it was. The weight of unacknowledged moments, flickering electricity had shifted into something else over the past few weeks- something, softer, lighter, deeper.
Y/N had stopped second-guessing the way she naturally gravitated toward him, the way her body angled toward him whenever they stood together, the way she reached for him without thinking. And Jake? Jake had stopped holding back.
He still teased her, still challenged her, still made her roll her eyes—but now, his affection was deliberate. When she handed him something, his fingers would brush hers and linger. When she got caught up in her work, he’d bring her water without a word. When she sat alone at night, tracing patterns in the bioluminescence, he’d sit beside her in silence, just to exist in the same space.
Finally, Y/N tilted her head up to look at him, her expression open in a way it hadn’t been before. No teasing smirk, no quick remark—just something warmer, something unspoken but completely understood.
Jake’s lips quirked into a quiet smile. “A lot of firsts for you these days.”
Y/N exhaled a small laugh, nodding.
“Think we should get to work now,” he offered and she meekly nodded.
Jake let her go and moved with quick precision, checked the equipment on deck, making sure the hydrophone was secured and that no water had splashed onto their more sensitive instruments. “Sunghoon, tell me you got that on camera,” he muttered.
“Barely!” Sunghoon yelled.
Y/N stayed close to the railings, keeping her eye out on the huge mass of shadow moving past the surface of the waters, just in case a whale surfaced again.
After spending days with whale songs filling the air, making their mornings, Sunghoon sent out his drone again and detected an entangled whale. After debating whether they were allowed to intervene, something about rules and regulations, they agreed to help the creature. Fear that it would die without sooner intervention and the excitement of being inches away from a whale, possibly being able to touch it, the group devised a plan of action.
Heeseung and Sunghoon stayed on the vessel as look-out through binoculars as the rest manoeuvred a small boat towards the hurting whale. It was only a few feet meters away from them but reaching it through the rough waters seemed like a task, all of a sudden. The waters were usually never this rough- first time in all the weeks they’d been on the ocean.
The water was colder than expected as Jake, Jay and Y/N descended, the massive form of the whale looming beneath them. Up close, the entanglement was worse than they’d thought—thick netting dug deep into the whale’s pectoral fin, restricting its movement. Y/N and Jay worked swiftly, slicing through the strands while Jake positioned himself to keep them steady. The whale remained eerily still, its eye just barely visible through the shifting blue.
Then, without warning, it thrashed, perhaps because of the sudden attention it was getting from foreign presence or perhaps from the pain of entanglement. The sudden burst of movement sent a powerful current surging around them. Y/N was thrown backward, Jay barely managing to steady himself. Jake instinctively reached for her, pulling her close before she could drift further. For a tense moment, they remained suspended in the water, waiting to see if the whale would calm. Slowly, its movements settled, and they resumed cutting. One final slice, and the last of the netting unraveled, drifting away into the depths. The whale hovered for a moment before, with a flick of its tail, it surged forward- free at last- and the three watched as it swam away from them.
“I can’t believe that just happened,” Y/N said. “I can’t believe I just did that- we just did that.”
Upon arriving back on the vessel, the team moved on autopilot—securing equipment, hauling themselves aboard, and stripping off their dive gear. A string of celebratory huzzas were passed around as Y/N slumped against a chair. The air was thick with exhilaration and exhaustion, breaths still uneven from the dive. Sunghoon handed Y/N a towel as she squeezed the seawater from her hair, her mind still in the depths, replaying the whale’s final surge to freedom.
Jason was already hunched over the laptop, fingers flying across the keyboard as he analyzed the recordings. "The change in vocalizations—it's real," he muttered, half to himself, half to Jay, who leaned over his shoulder. Jay's grin was unstoppable. "We’re really hearing this in real-time. That’s insane."
The others busied themselves cleaning up, but the adrenaline was still too fresh to settle. Heeseung cracked open a bottle of water, while Sunghoon replayed drone footage on his tablet, scrutinizing every frame. "We actually did it," he murmured, half in disbelief.
Y/N, however, found herself drifting away from the commotion. She was exhausted and desperately needed rest for her eyes. Her arms went slump and legs felt heavy and when Jake spotted her heaving breath, he made his way towards her, offering himself as a pillow. The pair slumped on each other, Jake running a hand up and down her arm as she drowned out the commotion around her.
“Just a few minutes,” she mumbled and nuzzled deeper into his chest, hugging his torso. Jake chuckled.
Their peace didn’t last long, though. Jake felt it before he saw it, the subtle shift in the air, the way the horizon darkened like spilled ink bleeding into the sky. A low rumble rolled across the sky, so distant at first that no one paid it much mind. But then came the wind—sharp, biting, and sudden. The gentle lull of the ocean turned erratic, the once-glassy surface growing restless beneath them.
A storm was coming. Fast.
“Storm’s rolling in,” Heeseung called from the helm, voice edged with urgency. “We need to secure everything—now.”
Y/N’s eyes shot open as her mind registered what was going on and everyone started moving in sync, doing what their training had taught them to do. Like it came out of nowhere, sheets of rain lashed against the deck, making it nearly impossible to see more than a few feet ahead. The ocean had turned violent, monstrous waves slamming into the vessel with enough force to send them stumbling. Sunghoon and Jay held onto the railings, Jake and Y/N barely finding a way to make it to safety as Heeseung and Jason controlled the steering. They could see them, their faces contorting with strain as they helped each other manoeuvred the wheel.
A rogue wave—towering, relentless—rose like a wall before crashing down onto the deck. The impact sent equipment flying, knocking everyone off balance. A sickening crack sounded through the storm, followed by a sharp, agonized cry.
“Jay!”
As Sunghoon hollered, he ran towards Jay on the unsteady vessel, fully equipped with the knowledge that they could be thrown overboard by the waves and the wind any second. Jay was crumbling against the rain, body twisted in pain as he held onto his forearm. “I think I broke it,” he repeated over and over again as Sunghoon carried him towards Jake and Y/N.
Jake and Sunghoon exchanged a look that Y/N couldn't decipher, a sort of language the two friends had accumulated through their years of friendship. When the vessel rocked again, Sunghoon grabbed Y/N’s arm and tried his best to get them inside- to safety, hopefully. Jake dashed the opposite direction, towards the wheelhouse.
“Where is he going?” Y/N yelled over the winds and the thunder that started to crack, crouching out of instinct though she knew it wouldn’t be much protection. Another wave crashed against the vessel, water flooding the deck. The rain fell harder above them, leaving them no mercy. They were being tossed around like a
“Distress signal,” Sunghoon shouted back, holding Jay in place amongst the imbalance.
The storm swallowed the horizon whole, a monstrous force of wind and water that turned the sky into an endless void of grey. The waves surged like biblical monsters, heaving and crashing against the vessel with relentless fury, each impact rattling through steel and bone alike. The world had shrunk to chaos—water seeping into every crevice, bodies thrown against railings, desperate hands gripping whatever they could to keep from being flung into the abyss.
“Sunghoon, we’re not gonna make it,” Y/N could feel her tears, tears of fear and defeat, mixing with the rain, eyes squinting as she searched for him amongst the fog.
“No, Y/N,” Sunghoon yelled. “We’re gonna make it.”
Somewhere, through the deafening roar of the storm, a voice crackled through the radio—a lifeline lost in static—before the darkness was split apart by a piercing beam of light.
The helicopter had arrived.
The harsh fluorescent lights buzzed overhead, a stark contrast to the wild, untamed darkness of the storm they had just survived. The six of them sat scattered around the hospital room, their bodies aching, their minds still reeling from the chaos that had led them here. The sterile scent of antiseptic filled the air, but beneath it lingered the salt of the ocean, a reminder that no matter how far they were from that vessel, the sea was still etched into their skin.
Jay sat in the center of it all, his arm immobilized in a sling, bruises painting his skin in deep purples and sickly yellows. He looked exhausted, but there was a ghost of his usual grin on his face as he tried to downplay the pain. “I guess this means I get out of heavy lifting for a while,” he joked, but no one laughed.
Because they all remembered.
They remembered the way the waves had swallowed the vessel, tossing them like rag dolls. The helplessness of gripping onto whatever they could, praying they wouldn’t be swept away. The panic when Jay had been thrown across the deck, a sickening crack cutting through the chaos. The way he had screamed. The frantic, trembling hands trying to keep pressure on his injury, the desperate voices yelling into the radio for help, the sheer terror that, for a moment, they might not all make it out.
Sunghoon sat at the edge of his hospital bed, staring at the floor with his elbows on his knees, fingers interlocked so tightly his knuckles were white. Jason and Heeseung murmured in hushed tones with a doctor at the doorway, nodding stiffly at whatever instructions were being given.
And then there was Y/N.
She sat beside Jake, her head resting against his shoulder, eyes open but unfocused. Her hands were clasped together in her lap, like she was grounding herself, trying to convince herself that they were safe now. That it was over.
Jake hadn’t let go of her since they had been pulled out of the storm. His grip on her hand was firm, like if he let go, she might disappear. The adrenaline had long worn off, leaving behind only exhaustion and the silent, heavy weight of everything they had endured.
For the first time in months, there was no vessel beneath them, no swaying of the ocean, no distant songs of whales humming through the water. Just the quiet hum of the hospital and the echo of a storm that still raged inside them. For the first time, Y/N wondered, had they all gone crazy without knowing it? She’d seen documentaries about this- how people stranded in a single environment could descend into a state of psychosis. Did that happen to them, sickness right under their noses?
When the doctor made her way towards the group, everyone lifted their heads and sat straight, reacting as though a professor had just walked into the classroom. Dr Ryu looked at them sternly, an absence of sympathy and solemness in her demeanour. Perhaps that is exactly what they needed. “You guys got lucky,” she said. “It could have been worse.”
Everyone responded with a sequence of nods, Jay wincing as he moved the wrong muscle. Jason shifted to his side, resting his hand on his back as support and comfort.
“Physically, you all should be fine. A quick recovery- Jay included,” Dr Ryu continued. “However, I highly recommend visiting a therapist. By the looks of it, this wasn’t something easy that you all had to go through and you now show increased vulnerability to PTSD or any related disorders. Please do take my advice seriously.”
Again, she was met with a sequence of nods and mumbles, assuring her that they would do their best in taking care of themselves and each other.
“We will keep Jay in for the night for observation,” Dr Ryu said. “Any of you can stay with him. The rest of you- go home. Go home to your families and just be in a more familiar space. Try to sleep- staying awake all night and mulling over it will not help. Your bodies are exhausted. Give it a rest and come back tomorrow.”
As she walked away from the group, a moment of silence fell over them as they went over what the doctor had said. PTSD? Who knew this was the turn their lives would take? To be fair, she only advised a therapist- there was no guarantee for anything at the moment.
“I’ll stay,” Jason said. The decision was made without much debate. Friends since a trip went wrong during university, it made sense that he stayed back. While working on a coastal biodiversity project, their boat engine failed during a data collection run, leaving them stranded at sea for hours. They were rescued by helicopters that day, too and looking back, their situation now looked eerily similar- just without the injury and the trauma.
Jason had already straightened in his seat, his expression leaving no room for argument. Jay rolled his eyes but didn’t protest. “You guys should go get some actual sleep. My apartment’s closer to the hospital anyway- you should spend the night there, give each other company.”
No one had the energy to argue.
Sunghoon sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. “I’m gonna pass out the second I hit a bed.”
“Same,” Heeseung muttered, already gathering what little belongings they had brought with them.
Y/N glanced at Jake, who had been uncharacteristically quiet. He still hadn’t let go of her hand, his thumb absentmindedly running over her knuckles. His eyes flickered toward Jason, something unreadable crossing his expression.
Jason caught it. “Don’t even think about staying, Jake,” he said, voice softer now but still firm. “You look worse than Jay.”
Jake huffed a quiet laugh, but Y/N felt the tension in his grip. He didn’t want to leave. None of them really did, but Jason was right- they needed rest, and Jay was in good hands.
Y/N squeezed his hand, a silent reassurance, before standing up. “We’ll be back first thing in the morning.”
Jason gave a small nod. “I’ll text you if anything happens.”
With that, they filed out of the room, exhaustion making their movements sluggish. The police drove them to Jason’s apartment and the second they opened the doors, Heeseung and Sunghoon occupied the guest bedroom and Jake dragged himself into Jason’s bedroom. Y/N found herself frozen in the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. She felt like a fool for feeling the way she did, for being naive enough to think that she could get past this like it was a bad birthday party.
Upon entering the room Jake was in, she found him sitting cross legged on the bed, back hunched over as he toyed with something on his phone. When he felt her presence, he kept his phone away and shifted his gaze to her. He patted the empty space beside him, coaxing her to sit with him and she did. She let her head hit the pillow and Jake leaned against the headboard, eyes falling on the ceiling. It was weird not catching sight of a night sky filled with stars- almost unfamiliar.
“I can’t stop thinking about it,” he whispered, almost as if saying it quieter would make their predicament lighter.
“I know,” she responded. “It doesn’t feel real,” she rested her hand against his shoulder, softly rubbing his back in hopes of comforting him. He leaned his cheek against her hand, raising his own to hold hers and closing his eyes to find solace in the moment.
“Everything’s gonna be alright,” he mumbled.
“Everything is alright,” she tried. “We’re all here, alive and safe. Jay is fine.”
“Jay is fine,” he repeated.
“And we are fine.”
“You almost died.”
Y/N leaned up and rested against the headboard with him, deliberately keeping her face close to his, breaths syncing. Jake’s eyes stayed close, his cheek still on her hand. “But I didn’t,” she said, with conviction.
“You were slipping away.”
Y/N didn’t know how to respond. The weight of it sat between them, heavy and unspoken. She knew that feeling. The terror of helplessness. The way it lingered in your bones, no matter how many times you tell yourself you survived.
She shifted, sliding closer, until their knees brushed. “But I’m here,” she murmured.
Jake lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her palm, and something inside her stirred. “I need to feel it,” he said, almost to himself. “That you’re here. That this is real.”
His hands found her waist, tentative and fragile at first like that night in the sleeping pods, testing the waters, walking on eggshells. When she moved closer to him, finding herself straddling his waist again, Jake found no motive to stop. He leaned upwards to find her lips, mouths colliding without hesitation- there was no adultery, no ploy of teasing or hurting, no uncertainty. They were two people, finding an anchor within each other, desperately holding on.
When he finally kissed her, Y/N wondered why it took so long for them to be in this position in the first place. And he kissed her with caution, slow movements memorising her crevices and making sure she remembered him. As their mouths opened and closed in sync, his hands roamed underneath her shirt, tracing her skin and counting her ribs before lifting her shirt over her head. In that moment, while he held her, she didn’t feel lusted over or sexualised- she felt as though she was being protected, cherished… loved.
“Y/N… I don’t just want you,” he breathed against her, lips moving down her throat and hands roaming her legs. “I need you.”
Slowly, wrapping his arms around her back, he flipped her over so she lay on the bed and he hovered over her. For a brief moment, he stopped to look at her face- her eyes that were filled with curiosity and anticipation, lips parted in waiting for him, hair strewn across the pillow. Then he kissed her again, one hand roaming towards her nippled and the other swiftly unzipping her jeans. In this moment, though he usually wouldn’t prefer to, Jake wasted no time- he didn’t want to tease her or waste his time with foreplay. He just wanted to feel her, know that she was living in his arms, breathing and letting her heart beat against him.
His hand shifted to move her jeans off her legs and Y/N shimmied out of them, chuckling in the process. “This isn’t that attractive,” she murmured.
“Shut up,” he said with a grin and kissed her again.
He let his fingers hook under her underwear and touch her clit. Y/N moaned into his and he moaned back, feeling the wetness of her folds and letting her back arch into him. Her hips grinded against his hand and he complied by exploring her folds, slowly and desperately getting her to whine and moan more under him.
“Heeseung and Sunghoon are sleeping,” Jake mumbled against her skin, lips exploring the nape of her neck and moving to the curve of your breasts. “You’ve gotta try to be quiet, yeah?”
“Okay,” she heaved and Jake could feel her nod, her chin touching his hair.
He slipped a finger into her hole and she squirmed, biting her lip to adjust to the length. Her hands flew towards his hair, tugging and pulling at the silky tufts. He moved his finger in and out, languidly and deliberately, eyeing your reactions and expressions as he did so. His thumb flew to her clip, rubbing steady circles only for more wetness to ooze out of her.
“Higher, Jake,” he heard her moan and he increased his pace. The sound of squelching filled the room, mixed with their moans. He kissed her again, his other hand continuing to toy with her nipples while he fingered her- now, fast and dirty, aiming towards a goal. He could feel her clenching on his fingers, clamping down everytime he pulled out too much, whimpering every time he curled at the right spot.
Jake moved so he could kneel between her legs, his fingers now moving slower as he brought his face closer to her heat. She could feel his breath on her, only making her ache for him more. She whined for him to hurry up and was only shut up when she felt his mouth on her. He sucked on her clit as his finger picked up pacing, adding a second one as her breath got heavier. He could see her chest heaving, her hands flying upwards to grip the headboard.
When her knees started closing instinctively, his shoulders kept them apart, one hand gripping her hip so tight she was sure she’d have bruises the next morning. And he kept going, sucking and flicking at her clit with his tongue, fingers moving in and out of her so fast that she’d forgotten how she ended up here in the first place.
“I’m so close,” she moaned. “So close.”
And just as she felt her high crashing down on her, he’d withdrawn himself completely and she let out a gasp. Her brows furrowed, she tilted her head to find Jake stripping his own clothes and she stared at the way his chest glistened under the moonlight, his dick springing out of his boxers as he moved to hover over her again. His hair fell onto his forehead and her hands moved to tuck it under his ear. She placed an innocent peck on nose, cheeks, forehead and chin before moving to his lips again, waiting for him to do something before getting annoyed at her lack of orgasm.
“Brace yourself, alright?” He whispered into her mouth and she felt his tip aligning to her entrance. He looked at her before going any further, waiting for a confirmation. When she nodded, he pushed himself into her and the pair moaned in unison.
“Is this the great sex you were referring to?”
“You can’t deny it.”
As he thrusted into her, sharp and with purpose, she regretted wanting to tease him or get a laugh out of him. She let out a gasp, followed by an incoherent string of moans as he thrusted in and out of her, his hand caressing the back of her head and her nails scratching his back. She wrapped her legs around his waist, a desperate way to feel him deeper inside her. He buried himself in the nape of her neck, peppering kisses behind her ear while she did the same to his shoulder.
“Faster,” she moaned and he complied, forgetting the slow and romantic pace he wanted to go with and pounding into her faster, harder- anything and everything to get her to cum with him. He let a hand slip in between their bodies, fingers finding her clit and rubbing briskly and whispering sweet lulls into her ears.
“You gotta cum with me, yeah?” He said and she could only nod, throat too preoccupied with the moans she couldn’t hold back.
She felt the knot in her stomach building again, back arching further and pussy clenching harder onto is dick- he could feel it too, that she was close. She threw her head back, waiting for the moment to fall upon her, waiting for him to say something. He only went faster, letting the hinges of the bed creek.
“Y/N?” She responded with a frustrated hum. “Cum with me- cum for me.”
And she did, letting her orgasm spill over her body and she could feel him inside her, filling her up to the brim. Jake moaned, feeling her body shudder at the way he fucked her, her eyes meeting his with desperation and ache.
“Jake…” she whined as he placed her body comfortably on the mattress again, falling on the empty space beside her and wrapping his arms around her torso. “So good,” she breathed, unable to unclutter her thoughts.
“I know that was supposed to be depression sex, but wow,” he said into her neck.
Y/N raised a lazy hand to hit him on the head. “Stop being funny,” she groaned and he laughed.
Jake, Y/N, Jason, Heeseung, Jay and Sunghoon stood in a line in front of Henry Sim. Over the past few weeks, they’d met with him a plethora of times- just to talk, not even about technical things, just talk. It was his way of looking out for them, taking care of them in whatever way he could. He offered to buy them meals, pay their therapy and hospital bills and even offered them a stipend if they needed it- all out of guilt and desperation to help them heal better, not knowing what else to do.
He was never critical, even praising their work to a large extent. And in all honesty, he was proud- it was great work. “This information that you all have gathered is valuable, I hope you know that,” he said to them, holding their report in hand.
“Yes, sir,” they answered in unison.
“It still feels unreal. Like we’re supposed to wake up tomorrow and check the equipment again,” Sunghoon said.
Jay chuckled, adjusting the sling on his arm. "Speak for yourself. I’d rather not get thrown around another boat for a while."
Heeseung smirked. "You’re just mad the whale was stronger than you."
Sunghoon, who had been absentmindedly fidgeting with the strap of his camera bag, let out a small laugh, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. The energy in the room had shifted, nostalgia seeping in through the cracks.
Henry exhaled through his nose. "The ocean doesn’t let anyone walk away the same. You six will carry this experience with you—whether you realize it now or not."
Jake, who had been quiet until then, glanced at Y/N. She met his gaze, and for a moment, the past months condensed into something unspoken but understood. The storm. The breach. The long nights and quiet moments. The feeling of something beginning even as something else ended.
Noticing their interaction, Henry cleared his throat. “The least I was expecting was the pairing of these two,” he pointed between Jake and Y/N. The rest of the group cackled.
“They thought they were being so slick,” Heeseung laughed. “We noticed everything.”
Rolling their eyes, Jake and Y/N continued to grin at everyone's smiling faces. The aquarium lights flickered slightly as a school of fish glided past the large tank beside them. It was a strange, almost poetic parallel—them, sitting still in this room, while life outside moved on without waiting.
Jason grimaced at the idea of his brother and best friend dating. Attempting to change the conversation, he cleared his throat. “So what now?”
The question hung heavy in the air as the group of six looked at each other. They knew what was to come- a set of interviews, press releases of what they experienced and perhaps even a short YouTube documentary. But what was to happen to their lives? What were they to expect?
No one wanted to answer that question. All they knew was that outside, the ocean awaited their return.
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jakedaydreaming · 4 months ago
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ᯓ★ dance practice . 西村力! ୧
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⋆˙ ⟡ pairing: childhoodfriend!riki x reader
⋆˙ ⟡ genre: FLUFF; kissing, skinship, playful banter.
⋆˙ ⟡ synopsis: childhood friends, you and riki, find their late-night dance practice turning into something more. years of unspoken feelings rise to the surface as playful banter evolves into flirtation, and the line between friendship and romance blurs in the quiet intimacy of the studio.
૮₍´˶• . • ⑅ ₎ა click here!
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the late-night studio air was thick with the familiar scent of sweat and polished floors. you were battling a particularly stubborn choreography, the beat pulsing through you, but your frustration was growing. you'd been at it for hours, and the tricky transition just wouldn't click.
"still fighting with that move, huh?" a familiar voice drawled, and you turned to see riki leaning against the mirrored wall, a playful smirk on his face. "i thought you'd have mastered it by now, childhood bestie."
you rolled your eyes, a smile tugging at your lips. "oh, shut up, riki. you know i hate this part."
"well, maybe i can help," he said, pushing himself off the wall and walking towards you, his movements smooth and confident. "after all, i've known you since we were tripping over our own feet in ballet class."
"yeah, and you were always the one who landed gracefully," you retorted, but you couldn't deny the warmth spreading through you.
"exactly," he said, his eyes sparkling. "so, let's see what's going on." he stepped closer, his presence filling the space, and you suddenly felt a little flustered. "show me."
you ran through the move, stumbling slightly on the transition. riki watched intently, his eyes following your every move. "you're too tense," he said, his voice low. "you need to relax, let the music guide you."
he stepped behind you, his hands lightly resting on your shoulders. "like this," he whispered, his breath warm against your neck, sending shivers down your spine. he guided your body through the movement, his touch feather-light but firm. "feel the rhythm? let it flow."
you followed his lead, and suddenly, the move clicked. the transition felt effortless, smooth. you turned to him, a triumphant grin on your face. "i got it!"
"of course you did," he said, his eyes twinkling. "you just needed a little… persuasion."
the playful banter continued as you practiced together, the atmosphere charged with a familiar intimacy. riki's teasing was laced with a flirty undertone, and you found yourself blushing more than you'd like to admit.
"you know," he said, leaning closer, his voice a low murmur, "i always thought you looked beautiful when you dance. even back when you were wearing those ridiculous tutus."
you blushed, pushing him playfully. "oh my god, riki, stop."
"i'm just saying," he said, his eyes sparkling. "you have a way of moving that's… captivating. like you're telling a story with every step."
"you're just saying that because we've known each other forever," you said, but your heart was pounding.
"maybe," he said, his eyes meeting yours, his gaze intense. "or maybe it's because i've always been a little bit… captivated by you."
the air crackled with unspoken tension. he reached out, his fingers tracing the line of your jaw, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. "you know," he whispered, "we've been friends for so long… maybe it's time we tried something different."
he stepped closer, his eyes searching yours, and you knew that the line between friendship and something more was about to blur. "what do you mean?" you breathed, your voice barely a whisper.
"i mean," he said, his voice low and husky, "i've always liked you. more than a friend. and i think you feel the same way."
he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours, and you closed your eyes, the anticipation building. "riki…"
"shhh," he whispered, his lips finding yours in a soft, tender kiss. "just… let it happen."
the kiss deepened, a silent acknowledgment of the feelings that had been simmering beneath the surface for years. the late-night dance practice had become something more, a moment of realization, a turning point in your lifelong friendship. and you realized, he had always been flirty, you had just been too blind to see it.
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arilevenatz · 4 months ago
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Outscored 𝟏┃C.JH
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Pairing: jock!Jongho x Reader
Genre/trope: enemies to lovers au
Word Count: 25.7k (💀) [it's gonna be a 2 parter]
Warnings: biker jongho (need I say more?), he is also a bit annoying, but he becomes a MAN at the end
AN: Ok I'm a sucker for jongho, u guys know it. And after he posted his picture I had a seizure. And I kinda slipped and wrote this whole thing. And yeah this is for all the jongho girlies out there like me. Please please please love this as I spent a lot of time writing this!
Masterlist
This is part one. Read part two here-
one | two
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The brisk winter air nipped at YN’s cheeks as she stood at the entrance of her new college. The towering brick building seemed almost menacing in the gray morning light, but she pushed the uneasiness aside. This was her fresh start—a chance to prove herself in a new environment. With her books clutched tightly to her chest, she took a deep breath and walked inside.
The first few days were a whirlwind of introductions, lectures, and navigating unfamiliar hallways. YN quickly found herself bonding with Hanni, a bright and cheerful girl who seemed to know everyone. Hanni made the transition easier, guiding YN through the social intricacies of the campus.
By the end of the week, YN noticed something odd. Every time a certain group walked down the hall, conversations died, students avoided eye contact, and some even went as far as turning around to take another route. She spotted them from a distance—eight guys, each exuding an air of dominance that seemed to make the air thicker. They moved like a pack, and the energy around them was impossible to ignore.
"Who are they?" YN finally asked Hanni during lunch, her curiosity outweighing her hesitance.
Hanni’s face turned serious as she glanced around to make sure no one else was listening. “That’s Ateez,” she whispered. “They’re…well, the jocks of the college. Everyone fears them.”
YN frowned. “Why?”
“They’re not just athletes. They’re...intense. If someone so much as looks at them the wrong way, things don’t end well.” Hanni hesitated, lowering her voice further. “I heard someone got sent to the hospital last year because of an argument with one of them.”
YN’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”
“Yeah. Hongjoong is their leader. He’s smart but scary. Seonghwa, his second-in-command, always has this calm but intimidating vibe. Yunho and Mingi are the muscle—you don’t want to get on their bad side. San and Wooyoung? Absolute chaos, always ready to start something. Yeosang is quiet, but people say he’s the sharpest one of them all. And Jongho…he’s the enforcer. If Hongjoong gives the word, Jongho makes sure it’s done.”
YN’s stomach twisted uneasily. “They sound like villains in a movie.”
Hanni shrugged. “It’s best to steer clear of them. Just focus on your studies and don’t give them a reason to notice you.”
YN didn’t respond to Hanni’s warning, opting instead to stay quiet and let the conversation drift to safer topics. Deep down, she wasn’t sure how she felt about this so-called fearsome group. They sounded like trouble, but she didn’t see how avoiding them would be difficult—she wasn’t the type to get involved with people like that anyway.
Later that afternoon, YN walked into her next lecture, the chill of the earlier conversation still lingering. She found her usual spot near the back of the classroom, quietly unpacking her notebook and pen. The room slowly filled with students, but the air shifted when a group entered.
She didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. Whispers and nervous glances rippled through the class, and her pulse quickened.
For the first time, YN let herself take a cautious look. There he was—Jongho. He was hard to miss, even without the murmurs. Tall and broad-shouldered, he carried an aura of icy indifference, his sharp jawline and piercing gaze giving him an almost unapproachable air. He wore a simple hoodie, but somehow, it only emphasized his muscular frame.
YN quickly looked away, her heart pounding. So this is what Hanni meant. She had shared a class with him all week but hadn’t even realized it. She must have been too absorbed in adjusting to the new college life to notice.
Jongho took a seat a few rows ahead of her, close enough that she could see the subtle tension in his posture. He didn’t speak to anyone, his focus completely on the empty whiteboard at the front of the room. He radiated a coldness that seemed to push everyone away, yet she noticed how other students carefully avoided sitting near him.
Deciding to stick to her original plan, YN ignored his presence, keeping her eyes firmly on her notes throughout the lecture. But as the weeks passed, it became harder to pretend he wasn’t there. He was in more of her classes than she’d realized, and his presence was impossible to miss.
Jongho never caused a scene—he was silent, focused, and distant. Yet there was something about him that made her uneasy. He wasn’t just another student. There was a weight to him, a quiet strength that made the air feel heavier when he walked into a room.
And whether she wanted to admit it or not, YN was beginning to notice him more and more.
Jongho had never paid much attention to his classmates. He came to class, did what was required, and left—never lingering or engaging unless absolutely necessary. To him, school was simply a task to complete, something to cross off his list.
But one day, during a particularly grueling economics lecture, something caught his attention. The professor had asked a question—a tricky one that made most of the class go silent, their heads sinking lower to avoid eye contact.
And then, she spoke.
"Isn’t the answer related to the supply-demand equilibrium in a perfectly competitive market?"
Her voice was calm and self-assured, and when Jongho glanced up from his notebook, he saw her. She sat near the back, her expression thoughtful as she explained her reasoning. The professor nodded, impressed, and praised her for her detailed response.
Jongho’s brow furrowed. He hadn’t even considered answering that question—it had seemed too abstract to bother with. Yet, there she was, providing answers with ease.
At first, he shrugged it off. Maybe she just got lucky. But over the next few classes, he noticed it happening again. The professor would pose a difficult question, and before anyone else could muster the courage to speak, she’d answer it. Every time.
It started to bother him.
Jongho prided himself on being one of the smartest students in his classes, even if he didn’t flaunt it. He hated drawing attention to himself, but deep down, he knew he was sharp—more than capable of holding his own against anyone. Yet this transfer student, who barely even seemed to acknowledge anyone in the room, was constantly one step ahead.
“Who does she think she is?” he muttered under his breath after one particularly frustrating class.
From then on, Jongho found himself paying closer attention to her. He wasn’t sure if it was out of curiosity or sheer annoyance, but he started to notice little things about her. The way her hand shot up the moment a question was asked. The quiet determination in her eyes as she scribbled down notes. The slight smile she gave when the professor praised her responses.
It wasn’t just that she was smart—she was confident in her knowledge, and it was infuriating.
For the first time in a long time, Jongho felt like someone was challenging him. And he didn’t like it.
The buzz around campus was electric when the exam results were finally posted on the bulletin board. Students crowded around, eagerly scanning the list of names and scores. YN was among the last to approach, her usual calm demeanor giving way to quiet excitement.
When she finally found her name at the very top of the list, her heart soared. She had done it—topped her first major exam at the new college. Her efforts, countless late nights of studying, and meticulous note-taking had paid off.
Hanni squealed in delight when she saw the results. “YN! You’re at the top! I told you you’re a genius!”
YN laughed, the joy bubbling up inside her. “It’s just one exam, Hanni.”
“Doesn’t matter! You crushed it!” Hanni grinned and tugged her arm. “We’re celebrating. There’s this cute cafe nearby—my treat!”
They walked to the cafe, the chill of the winter day melting into the warmth of good company and coffee. YN felt proud, her confidence growing as Hanni hyped her up about her success.
But across campus, in a quieter corner of the library, Jongho wasn’t in such a celebratory mood.
He stared at the results list on his phone, his jaw clenched. Second place. He’d never been second. Not once. For as long as he could remember, his name had always been at the top. It was his thing—the one thing no one could take from him.
But now, there it was. YN. A name he hadn’t even bothered to remember until recently. The transfer student had dethroned him, and it stung.
Jongho closed his phone and leaned back in his chair, his arms crossed over his broad chest. His mind replayed the last few weeks: her quick answers in class, the way she always seemed to know everything, her calm confidence. He had brushed it off at first, but now it was clear—she wasn’t just smart. She was better than him, at least academically.
And Jongho hated losing.
“She’s just a transfer,” he muttered to himself, trying to shake off the irritation. “It’s probably beginner’s luck.”
But the more he thought about it, the more it bothered him. It wasn’t just the results—it was the way she seemed so unaffected by everything. While he was stewing in his frustration, she was probably out there celebrating, not even thinking twice about the fact that she had knocked him down.
For the first time in a long time, Jongho felt something unfamiliar—a mix of annoyance and determination. He wasn’t about to let this stand.
“Fine,” he thought, his jaw tightening. “Let’s see how long she can keep this up.”
Jongho's frustration only grew as the weeks turned into months. Every test, every quiz, every exam—YN was always at the top. It didn’t matter how much he studied or how hard he tried to reclaim his spot. Her name remained above his, and it gnawed at him.
His friends noticed the change in him.
During one of their usual hangouts, Wooyoung nudged Jongho with his elbow. “You’ve been acting weird lately. What’s up with you?”
“Nothing,” Jongho muttered, not bothering to look up from his phone.
San leaned back in his chair, smirking. “Don’t tell me it’s about those scores again. You’re still stuck on that, aren’t you?”
“I said it’s nothing,” Jongho snapped, his voice sharper than he intended.
Wooyoung raised an eyebrow. “Oh, it’s definitely something. You’ve been sulking since those results came out. What’s the deal with her? Did she do something to you?”
Jongho sighed, running a hand through his hair. “No, she didn’t do anything. She just—she keeps beating me. It’s annoying.”
Yeosang, who had been quietly observing, finally spoke up. “So what? You’re not used to competition?”
“It’s not just competition,” Jongho muttered. “It’s like…no matter what I do, she’s always one step ahead.”
The room fell silent for a moment before San shrugged. “Then maybe talk to her. Figure out what she’s doing that you’re not.”
Jongho scoffed, leaning back in his chair. “Yeah, like I’m going to go up to her and ask for advice. She’s the reason I’m in this mess.”
But even as the words left his mouth, he knew San had a point. He couldn’t keep letting this get to him. If he wanted to understand why she was always on top, he’d have to confront her eventually.
Two months had passed since the first exam results, and YN’s streak hadn’t faltered. Every high score, every bit of praise from the professors only added to Jongho’s growing frustration. He’d tried ignoring it, tried telling himself it didn’t matter, but the truth was, it did.
He finally decided he couldn’t take it anymore. After class one afternoon, as the students began to trickle out of the lecture hall, Jongho stayed behind, his eyes fixed on YN as she packed her things.
She was just about to leave when he stood up, his tall frame casting a shadow over her desk.
“Hey,” he said, his voice low and steady.
YN looked up, surprised to see him standing there. “Oh, hi.”
For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. He had spent so long stewing in his own thoughts that now, face-to-face with her, he felt unprepared.
“You’re YN, right?” he finally asked, even though he already knew the answer.
She nodded, her expression curious. “Yeah. And you’re Jongho.”
He was slightly taken aback that she knew his name, but he didn’t let it show. “We need to talk,” he said, his tone firm.
YN blinked, clearly confused. “About what?”
“About how you keep getting the highest scores,” he said bluntly. “And why you’re always ahead of me.”
Jongho froze as YN’s words echoed in his mind.
"Maybe it’s because you’re not studying enough."
She had said it so casually, so effortlessly, before slinging her bag over her shoulder and walking out of the room, leaving him standing there like a statue.
For a moment, all he could do was stare at the empty doorway. Then, something inside him snapped. A laugh escaped his lips, low and disbelieving at first, before growing louder.
When he walked out of the lecture hall and joined his friends, they immediately noticed something was off.
“Uh…why are you laughing like a maniac?” Wooyoung asked, leaning away from him as if Jongho had finally lost it.
“Did you finally crack under the pressure?” San teased, though there was genuine concern in his voice.
Jongho shook his head, the grin still lingering on his face. “She told me I don’t study enough,” he said, almost in disbelief, as if saying it out loud would make it sound less ridiculous.
Wooyoung blinked. “Wait. She said that?”
“The nerve,” San muttered, shaking his head.
Mingi, who had been quietly listening, tilted his head thoughtfully. “So…do you want us to talk to her? You know, scare her a bit? Make her think twice before pulling that again?”
Jongho’s laughter stopped abruptly. His expression hardened, and he gave Mingi a sharp look. “No.”
“No?” Wooyoung echoed, raising an eyebrow.
“No,” Jongho repeated firmly, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m not stooping to that level. I don’t need to threaten her to get what I want.”
“But she insulted you!” Wooyoung said, throwing his hands in the air.
“She didn’t insult me. She just…” Jongho paused, his jaw clenching as he searched for the right words. “She got under my skin.”
Yeosang, who had been leaning against the wall silently, finally spoke. “So what are you going to do about it?”
Jongho exhaled deeply, running a hand through his hair. “I’m going to beat her.”
“Hold up man what-” San frowned.
“In the next exam,” Jongho clarified, his eyes narrowing with determination. “I’m going to study harder than I ever have, and I’m going to take that top spot back. She thinks I’m not studying enough? Fine. I’ll show her exactly what I’m capable of.”
His friends exchanged glances, a mix of curiosity and concern on their faces.
Wooyoung leaned closer to San and whispered, “I give him three days before he snaps again.”
But Jongho ignored them, his mind already racing with plans. This wasn’t just about pride anymore. It was about proving to himself—and to her—that he was the best.
When Hanni heard what YN had said to Jongho, she nearly dropped her phone in shock.
“You told Jongho—the cold, terrifying Jongho—that he doesn’t study enough?” Hanni exclaimed, pacing back and forth in YN’s dorm room. Her voice was a mix of disbelief and panic, her hands flailing in the air.
YN, sitting calmly on her bed, shrugged as she sipped her coffee. “Yeah, I did. It’s the truth, isn’t it?”
Hanni stopped pacing and stared at her friend like she had grown a second head. “YN, you don’t just say that to someone like him! Do you have any idea who you’re dealing with? This is Jongho! The guy who could probably crush someone’s desk in half with his bare hands!”
YN smiled slightly, setting her cup down. “You’re exaggerating. He’s just another student, Hanni. Besides, it’s not like I insulted him. I gave him constructive criticism.”
“Constructive—YN, are you listening to yourself?!” Hanni groaned, clutching her head as if she could physically hold in her frustration. “I’m scared for you! What if he gets mad? What if his friends get involved? They’re not exactly known for handling things peacefully.”
“It’s fine,” YN said, her tone steady. “I don’t think he’s the type to do anything rash over something like this. He seems too...proud for that.”
“Proud?” Hanni snorted. “That’s putting it mildly.”
YN chuckled softly, leaning back against her pillows. “Look, Hanni, I appreciate you worrying about me, but it’s not a big deal. He’ll get over it. If anything, maybe it’ll motivate him to work harder.”
Hanni sat down heavily on the edge of YN’s bed, her arms crossed. “I hope you’re right. But if he so much as looks at you funny, I’m grabbing your hand and running for the hills. Got it?”
YN laughed, nudging her friend’s shoulder. “Got it. But trust me, I can handle myself.”
Hanni gave her a wary look but eventually sighed in defeat. “You’re way too calm about this. I don’t know whether to admire you or scream at you.”
YN just smiled, her confidence unwavering. Little did she know, Jongho wasn’t the type to let something like this go unnoticed—and he had no intention of backing down.
Jongho's determination was like a fire, burning through his focus as he buried himself in his books for weeks leading up to the next exam. He studied longer, harder—pushing his limits. He felt the tension, the pressure building in his chest every day. The thought of losing to YN again fueled his resolve. This time, he would prove he was the best.
But when the results came in, his stomach sank.
There it was again—YN's name at the top. Not his.
He clenched his jaw, staring at the paper with frustration boiling inside him. He had done everything right. He had pushed himself to the breaking point. And yet, once again, she had beaten him.
This time, it was different. This time, it wasn’t just about pride. Jongho could feel something snapping inside him, the pressure and disappointment manifesting as a tight ball of anger in his chest.
That day in class, he couldn’t focus. The words the professor spoke seemed distant and irrelevant, his mind consumed by the crushing weight of defeat. As he stared at the floor, barely registering the lecture, one of his classmates—someone who had clearly noticed his mood—decided to test him.
The guy leaned over and smirked, a sharp edge to his tone. "So, Jongho, how does it feel to be second to a girl? Maybe you should quit studying and leave it to the real people, huh?"
The words hit Jongho like a punch to the gut.
Before he could even think, he stood up, his chair scraping violently against the floor. His hands balled into fists. He didn’t say a word—he didn’t need to. The guy barely had time to react before Jongho stood up, took the guy's phone, slammed it to the ground, and crushed it under his boot.
The silence in the classroom was deafening.
But it wasn’t over.
Once class was dismissed, Jongho stormed out of the building, his anger blinding him. He found the guy outside, lurking near the campus gates, laughing to his friends about how "easy" it was to get under Jongho’s skin.
Jongho didn’t hesitate. He charged at the guy, grabbing him by the throat and pushing him against the nearest wall. The punches came fast and brutal, each one landing with a sickening thud.
The guy didn’t stand a chance.
It wasn’t until he was gasping for breath, barely conscious, that Jongho stopped. His knuckles were bloody, his anger slowly subsiding as the reality of what he had done set in.
When word of the fight spread through campus, it didn’t take long for YN to hear about it.
She had been in the library when a group of students started whispering, talking about how Jongho had beaten up some guy for talking trash about him. Her stomach twisted, and an unease settled in her chest.
The image of the cold, calculating Jongho she had always seen in class—silent, intense, and distant—was nothing compared to the picture that now formed in her mind. The guy had provoked him, sure, but it didn’t make the violence any less jarring.
That night, as she walked back to her dorm, her mind was racing. Jongho had never struck her as the violent type, but now she wasn’t so sure. The thought of him losing control scared her in a way she hadn’t anticipated.
YN leaned against the door of her room, her hand lingering on the knob. She wanted to shake the unease off, tell herself it was just a one-off thing. But a part of her couldn’t stop wondering what else lay beneath the surface of his cold exterior.
For the first time, she was genuinely afraid.
And as she lay in bed that night, trying to push the thoughts away, one question lingered in her mind: What would happen if he ever lost control around her?
The tension between YN and Jongho had been building for weeks, and it finally reached a boiling point. The news of the fight still fresh in YN's mind, she couldn't shake the unease every time she saw Jongho. His cold, imposing presence was something she'd learned to ignore—until now.
It was an ordinary afternoon when she walked through the halls, lost in thought, heading to her next class. The campus was quieter than usual, most students already in their lecture halls. As she turned down a less-traveled corridor, she froze. Jongho stood at the far end, his broad frame blocking the only way out.
He didn’t say anything at first, just watched her with that unreadable expression. YN’s heart rate quickened, her pulse pounding in her ears. She could feel the familiar tension rising in her chest, the uneasy flutter of anxiety that crept in whenever she had to face him. But this time, it felt different. She could sense that something had shifted.
She instinctively took a step back, her back pressing against the cold wall. Jongho’s eyes flickered for a moment, his lips curling into something between a smirk and a scowl. He started walking toward her, each step deliberate, the weight of his presence sending a chill down her spine.
"You really think you're better than me, huh?" Jongho's voice was low, almost menacing. His height loomed over her as he stopped just inches away, trapping her between his muscular frame and the wall.
YN’s breath caught in her throat, but she held her ground. Her legs were tense, her mind racing for a way to escape this moment. "I didn’t say that," she replied, her voice shaky but firm. "I just did my best. It’s not my fault you can’t handle it."
Jongho’s eyes darkened, his arms leaning on the wall beside her, the air between them thick with a charged tension. "You think it’s just about scores?" he growled. "You think I care about that little competition? You’re making me look weak, YN. And I don’t like that."
YN's hands clenched into fists at her sides, her fear and anger mixing into a potent cocktail. I have to stand my ground, she thought. I can't let him intimidate me like this.
"You don't scare me, Jongho," she said, lifting her chin to meet his gaze. Her words were quieter than she wanted, but there was strength behind them. "If you have a problem with me, then deal with it without resorting to violence."
The moment she said it, Jongho’s smirk widened, a flash of something darker crossing his features. "Oh, but I do have a problem with you. You think you can just waltz in here and take what’s mine, huh? You think you're better than me because you’re smarter? You think you can just walk around untouched?"
YN’s breath quickened as she realized how cornered she truly was. She had thought she could handle him, but now, with him standing so close, all she could feel was the overwhelming presence of his body. The intimidating way he leaned into her personal space, his arms just above her shoulders, blocking any escape.
"I’m not afraid of you," she said again, though she could feel the doubt creeping in. She was scared—terrified, even—but she refused to let him see that.
Jongho leaned in closer, his face hovering just inches from hers. "You should be," he whispered. "You’ve made me look like a fool twice now. You’ve gone and crossed a line, YN."
For a split second, she could feel her heart pounding in her throat. Was he going to hurt her? Was he finally going to break the calm facade he always wore? But before she could react, something in him shifted, and his grip loosened just slightly.
“Don’t make me do this again,” he murmured, pulling back just enough to leave her with a sliver of space. The tension didn’t fully dissolve, but it was a temporary reprieve.
The silence between them was thick, each of them locked in their own thoughts. YN’s mind was racing. What just happened? She had stood up to him, but had it been enough? Would he let this go, or would this feud only escalate?
Jongho finally straightened up, casting one last look at her. "You’re not getting away with this, you know," he muttered before turning and walking away.
YN let out a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding. Her legs were trembling, but she stood tall, refusing to let herself appear weak in front of him.
This was only the beginning. She knew that now. The rivalry between them had officially begun, and it would take everything she had to survive it.
The tension between YN and Jongho simmered beneath the surface, manifesting in small, irritating ways at first. It started with the little things—her pens went missing, her notes rearranged in ways that made no sense, and every now and then, she’d find her books out of order. At first, she thought it was just her imagination, or maybe even her own forgetfulness. But the longer it went on, the more she began to suspect that it wasn’t just random.
Then, one day, she was walking between classes when one of Jongho’s friends—Mingi, she recognized him from class—deliberately bumped into her, causing her to drop her bag and its contents. Papers scattered across the hallway, and YN scrambled to collect them, frustration bubbling beneath the surface.
“Oops, sorry,” Mingi said, his tone dripping with false sweetness, though his grin said otherwise.
YN said nothing, biting her lip and standing up straight, trying to keep her composure. She quickly gathered her things, but as she bent down to pick up the last few papers, she saw the same smirk on his face, as if he were enjoying the scene.
It was deliberate, she thought, clenching her jaw as she stood up.
She could feel his gaze still on her as she gathered the rest of her things in silence. But she didn’t let it show—she would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her flustered. When she walked away, she could sense his eyes lingering, but she kept her head high.
The following week, she arrived in class to find her desk had been vandalized. Not in a big, obvious way, but enough to leave a bad taste in her mouth. There were scribbles in the margins of her textbooks—crude drawings, insults, and even a few threatening words that made her skin crawl.
Jongho.
She didn’t have proof, but there was no mistaking it. She could feel his influence, like a shadow following her at every turn. And the worst part? It wasn’t just him. It was his friends, too. They were all in on it—targeting her, testing her patience, pushing her to the edge. They’d figured out how to get to her without crossing the line too far.
The final straw came one afternoon when she sat down at her desk and found her pencil case had been emptied out. It wasn’t just the pens this time; it was everything—everything scattered across the floor. When she picked up the pieces, her hands trembling, she saw a note hidden inside.
"Better luck next time, genius."
Her blood ran cold.
This time, it wasn’t just annoying. It was personal.
She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, her fists clenching. She could take a lot of things—insults, small pranks—but this was pushing it. This was harassment.
YN’s mind raced with determination as she walked through the campus, every step firm and resolute. The pencil case incident had been the last straw. Jongho and his friends had pushed her to her limits, and she wasn’t going to let them get away with it any longer.
She had been debating it for days, but now she was certain—she had to confront him, face to face. She knew it wouldn’t be easy. Hanni had tried to stop her, pleading with her to let things go. But YN couldn’t back down. She couldn’t let herself be intimidated. Not anymore.
She entered the cafeteria with a clear purpose, scanning the room until her eyes landed on him. Jongho sat at the head of a table, surrounded by his friends, laughing and joking as if everything were normal. The sight of him made her blood boil, but she didn’t hesitate. She walked straight up to the table, her steps loud and deliberate.
When she reached the center, she slammed her hands down on the table, the sound of it echoing through the cafeteria, drawing the attention of everyone around. The chatter died down, all eyes on her. Jongho’s friends froze, surprised by the sudden boldness. YN stood there, staring at Jongho with unwavering defiance.
"Stop these pathetic games and face me like a man!" she declared, her voice strong and clear.
The room fell silent, everyone waiting for Jongho’s reaction. His friends exchanged nervous glances, unsure of what to expect, while Jongho himself leaned back in his seat, his expression unreadable.
For a moment, everything felt frozen. Then, slowly, Jongho stood up, his chair scraping against the floor. His height towered over hers, and for a second, the sheer difference in their sizes was almost comical. He was a giant compared to her, and yet, there she was, standing tall and not backing down.
He studied her for a moment, a hint of amusement flickering in his eyes. His lips curled into that familiar, confident smirk. "So, you want me to face you, huh?" he said, his voice low but full of challenge. "Well, I guess I can give you what you want."
His friends were stunned, clearly not expecting YN to show such boldness. Some of them exchanged worried looks, while others couldn’t help but chuckle nervously.
Jongho didn’t look worried, though. He stepped closer to her, his towering presence making her feel even smaller. Yet, YN stood her ground, refusing to let her fear show.
“You’re brave,” Jongho said, his voice rough, but there was something almost impressed in it. "I’ll give you that." He tilted his head, eyes narrowing slightly. “But be careful what you wish for. You really want me to face you, YN? You sure about that?”
YN didn’t flinch. She locked eyes with him, her heart pounding in her chest. "I’m sure.”
For a long moment, they just stood there, locked in a silent battle of wills. The tension between them was thick, palpable. It wasn’t about the score anymore, not about the pranks or the harassment—it was about proving who had the upper hand.
Finally, Jongho broke the silence. He stepped back, crossing his arms. "Alright, YN. You’ve got my attention," he said, his voice cold but not dismissive. "You wanted me to face you. So I will."
The weight of his words hung in the air, and YN’s pulse quickened. This wasn’t over. It was only just beginning. She could feel the shift in their dynamic now, the lines of the feud being drawn more clearly than ever.
His friends remained silent, watching the exchange with bated breath. Jongho didn’t seem like he was going to back down either, and YN knew this wouldn’t end easily. But for the first time in a long while, she felt empowered. She had stood up to him, and he hadn’t crushed her. That meant something.
With a final glance at Jongho, YN turned away but not before she threw one last remark over her shoulder.
"I’m not afraid of you.”
The moment YN turned to leave, feeling the adrenaline of her bold confrontation, she felt a sudden, strong grip on her wrist. Before she could react, Jongho yanked her back with ease, his hand tightening around her wrist as he dragged her out of the cafeteria.
"Hey!" YN protested, trying to pull away, but his grip was unyielding, his strength overwhelming. She tugged harder, her steps stumbling as she struggled to break free, but it was no use—Jongho was far stronger than she could have imagined.
The cafeteria had fallen silent, all eyes still on them, but Jongho’s friends were the only ones who seemed unfazed. They continued their conversation as though nothing unusual was happening. It was clear to YN now—their group operated on a different set of rules, and no one dared challenge them.
Jongho didn’t look back, his focus entirely on pulling her out of the building. "Stop resisting," he muttered, his voice low and commanding. "If you wanted to talk, you should've done it differently."
YN’s heart raced in her chest. She had expected a confrontation, but not like this. Being dragged out of the cafeteria, humiliated in front of everyone—it was more than just a challenge now. It felt like an outright power play, a move to remind her of who really held the control.
“Let go of me!” she shouted again, trying to wrench her arm from his grip, but he didn’t even flinch. Instead, he pulled her toward the exit, his jaw set in a hard line.
Once they were outside, the cool air hit her face, but the storm in her chest only grew stronger. She was angry, more than she had been in weeks. She had finally stood up to him, and now he was treating it like some twisted game.
Jongho stopped in the middle of the empty courtyard, releasing her wrist abruptly. YN stumbled slightly, but caught herself before she could fall. Her hand instinctively rubbed where his grip had been, the sting of it still fresh.
"That’s the problem with you," Jongho said, his voice cold, but there was an edge to it now. "You think you can just challenge me like that, without consequences? You think you can walk in here and take everything, without anyone pushing back?"
YN glared at him, her pulse still racing. "I didn’t want to take anything. I just wanted you to stop being a coward. To face me without all your games."
Jongho’s expression didn’t soften. If anything, it grew more intense. "You don’t get it, do you? This isn’t just about you and me. This is about who owns this place. Who holds the power."
He took a step closer to her, towering over her as usual. The same sense of intimidation that had always been there was present now, but something in his eyes—a flicker of something deeper—made her pause for a second.
"What happens next, YN? You think you can win this? Because right now, you’re just poking the bear, and trust me, you don’t want to go any further." His voice was dangerously calm, like he was warning her—threatening her.
For a moment, YN’s breath caught. She had been so focused on proving herself, on standing up to him, that she hadn’t considered what would come next. She had no idea what kind of person Jongho really was, and now, facing him in this quiet courtyard, she realized just how deep the game went.
But despite the fear clawing at her chest, she wasn’t ready to back down. Not now. Not after everything she had endured.
"I’m not scared of you, Jongho," she said, her voice unwavering. "You want to play? Then let’s play. But I’m not going to let you intimidate me anymore."
Jongho stood there for a long moment, studying her as if trying to figure her out. Then, without another word, he turned and began to walk away, his back to her.
But as he reached the entrance to the building, he paused and looked over his shoulder.
"You’ll regret this," he said quietly, his voice carrying an almost unrecognizable note of warning. "You have no idea who you're dealing with.”
YN stood there, watching him go, the weight of his words sinking in. But even with that warning hanging in the air, she wasn’t going to back down. Not now.
She had made her choice. And from here on out, she would face the consequences.
The days following their confrontation marked the beginning of something far more sinister than YN had ever anticipated. What started as small pranks—missing books, random notes, pens vanishing from her desk—soon escalated into something far more calculated. Jongho wasn’t just trying to annoy her anymore. Now, it was as if he were playing a psychological game with her, testing her limits, breaking her down bit by bit.
At first, it was subtle. During class, Jongho would sit behind her and drop her textbooks just enough to cause a distraction, so she’d lose her focus. When she turned around, he’d act like it was an accident, offering a lazy apology that barely sounded sincere. The worst part was, he didn’t stop when she asked him to. Instead, the “accidents” seemed to happen more frequently, each one wearing her down, bit by bit.
Then came the whispers. At lunch, when YN walked into the cafeteria, she’d overhear Jongho’s friends whispering just loud enough for her to catch snippets of conversation. They’d talk about her in the most degrading way, not even bothering to hide it, knowing she could hear. She’d try to ignore them, but every word they said lingered in her mind. They called her a nerd, mocked her for thinking she could take on Jongho. But what stung the most was when they started to question her sanity, insinuating that she was unstable, that maybe she was imagining things.
The insults didn’t end there. As days passed, YN would arrive at her locker to find it had been vandalized again—her carefully written notes defaced with sarcastic messages, her books covered in nonsensical drawings, and sometimes, there would be personal remarks, comments that hit too close to home.
She was starting to feel it—the isolation. The feeling that she was being targeted by something darker than just school pranks. Every time she walked into class, she could feel eyes on her. Jongho’s eyes. He had made it clear that he enjoyed the game, that he enjoyed seeing her squirm.
But what was worse was how it started to affect her. She’d find herself unable to concentrate in class, the constant weight of his presence in the background. She started second-guessing her every move, wondering if her classmates could see the cracks forming in her façade. Her hands trembled when she reached for her books, and she found herself waking up in the middle of the night, heart racing, thinking she’d heard footsteps outside her door, as if he was watching her even when she wasn’t at school.
One afternoon, after a particularly brutal round of pranks in class, YN was heading to the library to get some quiet time. But as she turned the corner, she froze. Jongho was leaning against the wall, blocking her way. His usual smirk was replaced with something darker, a glint in his eyes that sent a chill down her spine.
"Thought you could escape?" he said softly, the words hanging in the air like a threat. "You’re mine now, YN. You’re not going to get away from me that easily." His tone was low, but there was a certainty to it, a finality that made her stomach twist.
She took a step back, trying to ignore the panic rising in her chest. "What do you want from me?" she asked, her voice shaky despite her best efforts to remain calm.
Jongho pushed off the wall and walked toward her slowly, his steps measured. "I want you to understand who’s in control," he said, his voice quiet but full of malice. "You don’t get to come in here, challenge me, and expect it to end like a fairy tale. You want to keep playing? Fine. But you better be prepared to lose. And when you do, I’ll be here to remind you."
Her heart raced as he took another step forward, his presence looming over her. There was no escape, no way to fight back. He had already won in ways she couldn’t even begin to comprehend. She stood frozen, a mix of fear and anger coursing through her veins.
She didn’t say anything more as Jongho turned and walked away, leaving her standing there with her heart pounding in her chest. The quiet moments after he left felt more oppressive than any of the pranks or insults he’d thrown her way. She could feel the weight of his words settling on her, knowing that he had marked her as his target, and there would be no way to avoid his wrath.
Jongho was playing a game, but this time, it wasn’t just about winning or losing. It was about control—and he was determined to make YN realize just how powerless she truly was.
The day had come. YN could feel herself on the edge, the constant psychological torment, the pranks, the whispers, the humiliation—it had all built up to this moment. Her hands shook slightly as she sat in class, trying to focus on the lecture, but her mind was clouded with frustration. She had been walking around with a constant knot in her stomach for weeks, dreading every moment she stepped into class, every glance that was thrown her way.
Jongho had been especially persistent that day. The moment she sat down, he was there, taking his usual seat behind her. His presence felt like a weight pressing down on her, and she could almost feel his eyes on her back, waiting for the perfect moment to start.
Then, it happened. Just like every other time, he shook her desk, hard enough to make her papers tremble and her drink teeter dangerously on the edge. But this time, something inside her snapped.
Her hand gripped the cup tighter than she realized, the warmth of the coffee almost burning her palm, but it didn’t matter. In one swift motion, she turned around and dumped the entire contents of her coffee on Jongho’s desk. The liquid splashed across his notes, seeping into the wood and staining everything in its path. The room went completely silent.
Jongho froze, his expression blank for a moment, as the coffee soaked into his things. The other students in the class watched in shock, unsure of how to react. YN's breath was coming fast and ragged, her heart racing in her chest. She had done it. She had finally snapped.
Jongho’s face twisted in anger, but there was something else in his eyes—surprise, maybe even a flicker of respect. He looked up at her, his jaw clenched.
“You think this is funny?” he growled, his voice low, dark with frustration.
But YN didn’t flinch. She didn’t back down. The tension in the room was palpable, but for the first time in weeks, she felt a sense of control. Her voice came out calm, but her eyes were fiery.
“Do you think this is funny, Jongho?” she shot back, her words sharp like daggers. “Do you think it’s funny what you’ve been doing to me all this time? The pranks, the insults, the mind games? You think I’m just going to sit here and take it? Well, I’m done.”
The class was dead silent, no one daring to speak. Jongho didn’t respond immediately. Instead, he slowly stood up, towering over her. His friends, who had been silent spectators until now, shifted uneasily in their seats, glancing at each other.
"You’re really testing me now, YN," Jongho said, his voice controlled but filled with an edge that made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. "You think this is the end of it? You think dumping coffee on my desk will make me back off?"
YN stood her ground, her posture strong, though inside she could feel a storm brewing. “Maybe it won’t make you back off, but it’ll make you think twice. You’re not invincible, Jongho. And I’m not afraid of you anymore.”
He stared at her for a long moment, the anger and frustration in his gaze palpable, before he finally spoke again, his voice low but cold.
"Don’t think this is over," he said, his eyes never leaving hers. "You just made it worse for yourself."
But YN didn’t care anymore. She had finally spoken up, finally taken a stand. For the first time, she wasn’t the quiet, submissive girl she had been before. She had fought back, and even though she knew things were far from over, a small part of her felt empowered.
As Jongho turned and walked away, his footsteps heavy and deliberate, YN stayed seated for a moment, her heart still racing. She didn’t know what was coming next, but she knew one thing for sure: she wouldn’t let him control her anymore. She had drawn a line in the sand, and this time, she wasn’t going to let him cross it.
As YN and Jongho stood there, the tension between them thickening with every word exchanged, neither of them willing to back down, the professor’s voice cut through the silence like a sharp knife.
"Enough," the professor said, standing up from behind the desk. "Both of you, stay after class. You're clearly not focused on the lesson, so you're going to stay behind and finish your homework together. You’ll leave once you both complete it. Understood?"
The class seemed to hold its collective breath, eyes darting between the two of them. The professor’s order caught both YN and Jongho off guard, but neither could afford to challenge it. Both were still seething from their confrontation, their tempers flaring, but the professor had made it clear that there would be consequences if they didn’t comply.
Jongho shot YN one last, heated look, his jaw clenched tightly, before muttering under his breath, "This isn’t over."
YN didn't bother to respond. She was too exhausted, emotionally and mentally, to keep fighting. Instead, she gathered her things quickly and retook her seat, ignoring the whispers that started circulating through the room. Jongho, reluctantly, sat down beside her, though the air between them was still thick with animosity.
The professor, seemingly unfazed by the tension between the two students, resumed the lesson, but the entire class was distracted by the palpable conflict unfolding before them. Time dragged on as YN tried to focus on her work, her hands shaking slightly from the adrenaline that still buzzed in her veins. Her eyes kept darting toward Jongho, who was scribbling furiously in his notebook, as though the homework could somehow take his mind off the encounter.
Finally, the bell rang, signaling the end of the class, but the professor gestured for them both to stay. The students filed out of the room, leaving just the two of them alone, and the silence between YN and Jongho grew even more awkward. Neither of them spoke as they began working on the homework, the atmosphere charged with tension.
For the first few minutes, it was clear that neither was ready to engage in any form of conversation. YN focused on her paper, trying to ignore the weight of Jongho's presence beside her. But every now and then, she felt the heat of his gaze, the intensity of it making her skin prickle. She couldn’t quite shake the feeling that he was still watching her, trying to figure out what she would do next.
Eventually, the silence became unbearable. Jongho broke it, his voice low but dripping with frustration.
"This is your fault, you know," he muttered, his pen tapping against the desk in agitation. "If you hadn’t made a scene, none of this would’ve happened."
YN didn’t look up from her paper, her focus unwavering. She had long stopped caring about his blame. "I didn’t make a scene. You pushed me to it. I didn’t ask for this," she shot back, her voice steady but edged with annoyance.
Jongho let out a low, frustrated growl. "You think I care about your excuses?" he snapped. "You think I won’t make you regret this?"
YN met his gaze, her own expression hardening. "I’m done with you trying to make me regret everything I do. You don’t scare me, Jongho."
For a moment, they just stared at each other, the tension crackling between them like electricity. It was clear that neither of them had the intention of backing down, but there was something else, too—something unspoken, a shift that neither could quite understand.
Jongho let out a deep breath, finally turning back to his homework. The air between them wasn’t any less tense, but at least it was quiet now, with both of them trying to get through the task at hand.
Time dragged on, and the silence remained. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, YN finished her homework. She stood up, her chair scraping loudly against the floor, and started to gather her things.
"Done," she said curtly, not bothering to look at him as she slung her bag over her shoulder.
Jongho followed suit, packing up his things, but his movements were stiff, like he was still holding something back. He didn’t say anything as YN turned to leave, but she could feel his gaze burning into her back.
"See you around, YN," he said, his tone low, a challenge lingering in his words.
YN paused at the door, her hand on the handle. She turned to face him, her expression cold but firm. "You’ll never get me to back down, Jongho," she said, her voice steady. "And one day, you’ll realize that."
Without another word, she stepped out into the hallway, leaving Jongho standing there, his fists clenched at his sides, trying to understand the weight of her words. The conflict between them was far from over, but somehow, YN felt like she had taken a small step toward taking back control. She didn’t know what would happen next, but for the first time, she felt like she could face whatever came her way.
After that tense punishment session, YN made a firm decision—she was done engaging with Jongho. She’d had enough of his games, his constant attempts to rattle her, and the exhausting back-and-forth that seemed to follow them everywhere. From that day forward, she resolved to ignore him completely.
She wouldn’t look at him during class. If she felt his gaze on her, she’d keep her head down and focus on her notes. If his friends tried to whisper snide remarks as she passed by, she’d pretend not to hear. She even started taking different routes to her classes to avoid crossing paths with him altogether.
At first, it seemed to work. Jongho didn’t immediately escalate things, and YN began to feel a small sense of relief. Hanni noticed the change too and encouraged her to keep at it.
“It’s the best way to deal with guys like him,” Hanni said one afternoon as they studied together in the library. “They thrive on attention. If you don’t give him any, he’ll eventually get bored and move on.”
YN nodded, determined to stick to her plan. She was finally starting to feel like she could breathe again, even if the occasional encounter with Jongho still made her stomach twist.
But, of course, Jongho noticed.
At first, he thought her silence was just a phase, a temporary retreat before she would come back swinging. But as days turned into weeks, he realized she was serious. She wasn’t reacting to him at all. No glares, no comebacks, no confrontations. It was like he didn’t exist to her anymore.
And it infuriated him.
In class, he’d purposely drop his pen near her desk, just to see if she’d flinch. She didn’t. He’d make loud remarks to his friends, knowing she could hear, but she never looked his way. Even during group projects, when they were forced to interact, she kept her responses curt and professional, refusing to engage in any unnecessary conversation.
The more she ignored him, the more it ate at him. Jongho wasn’t used to being dismissed like this. People either feared him, admired him, or tried to stay on his good side. But YN? She acted like he didn’t even matter.
One day, during a particularly dull lecture, Jongho found himself staring at her from across the room. She was diligently taking notes, her brow furrowed in concentration. Something about her calm, focused demeanor made his irritation bubble to the surface. How could she be so unaffected?
After class, as YN packed up her things, Jongho lingered by the door, waiting for her to leave. When she finally stepped into the hallway, he fell into step beside her, his presence impossible to ignore.
“You think ignoring me is going to make me stop?” he asked, his tone low and almost teasing.
YN didn’t even glance at him. “I don’t care what you do, Jongho. Do whatever you want. It doesn’t concern me anymore.”
As YN took a step to walk away, Jongho’s hand shot out, grabbing her wrist—not harshly, but firm enough to stop her in her tracks. She froze, her eyes darting to where his fingers wrapped around her wrist before snapping up to meet his gaze.
“What is it now?” she asked sharply, her voice tinged with exasperation. “I talk to you, you make my life miserable. I ignore you, and now you’re bothering me again. What do you want from me, Jongho?”
Her words hung in the air, cutting through the bustling noise of students in the hallway. Jongho didn’t respond immediately, his jaw tightening as he stared at her. For a moment, it seemed like he was struggling to find the right words, his usual confidence faltering.
“I…” he started, but then stopped, his frustration evident. He released her wrist, running a hand through his hair as if trying to compose himself.
“You’re so irritating,” he finally said, his tone low but not as sharp as usual.
YN blinked, caught off guard by the unexpected response. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me,” he said, his voice growing more frustrated. “You’re irritating. You come in here, acting like you’re better than everyone—"
“I never acted like that!” YN cut him off, her voice rising. “All I’ve done is mind my own business and try to survive in this place. You’re the one who decided to make me your target. And for what? Because I’m smarter than you? Because I beat you on a few exams? Get over it, Jongho!”
Her words hit him like a slap, and for a moment, Jongho just stared at her, his lips pressed into a thin line. She didn’t back down, her chest rising and falling with anger, her gaze steady and unwavering.
“You don’t get it,” he muttered, more to himself than to her.
“Then explain it to me,” YN snapped, crossing her arms. “Because I’ve had enough of your nonsense. If you’ve got something to say, just say it already.”
Jongho looked at her, his expression unreadable. His usual arrogance seemed to waver, replaced by something more vulnerable, though he masked it quickly.
“You’re the first person who’s ever beaten me,” he said finally, his voice quieter than she expected. “I’ve always been at the top, always been the one everyone looked up to. And then you show up, and suddenly… I’m not.”
YN blinked, her anger softening just slightly. She hadn’t expected him to admit that, least of all to her.
“That’s what this is about?” she asked, her tone incredulous. “Your ego?”
Jongho’s jaw clenched, and he looked away. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“No, I do understand,” YN said, her voice firm but calmer now. “You’re used to being the best, and when you’re not, you don’t know how to handle it. But that doesn’t give you the right to make my life hell. I’ve worked hard to get where I am, just like you. If you have a problem with me, deal with it in a healthy way. Compete with me in class, not by… whatever this is.”
Her words seemed to strike a chord, and for the first time, Jongho didn’t have a retort. He just stood there, staring at her, his expression unreadable.
“Are we done here?” YN asked after a moment, her voice steady but tinged with exhaustion.
Jongho hesitated, then gave a small, almost imperceptible nod.
“Fine,” she said, turning on her heel and walking away.
Jongho watched her go, his mind a whirlwind of thoughts. For the first time, he felt… uncertain. He couldn’t explain it, but something about her words lingered, gnawing at him in a way that nothing ever had before.
Jongho sat with his friends at their usual spot in the cafeteria, poking at his food absentmindedly. The others were chatting and laughing, but his brooding silence didn’t go unnoticed.
Wooyoung was the first to comment, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. “Alright, spill it. What’s got you looking like someone stole your protein powder, Jongho?”
“Yeah,” Mingi chimed in, stuffing a handful of chips into his mouth. “You’ve been weird lately. Is it because of that girl again?”
At the mention of YN, Jongho’s jaw tightened. He didn’t look up, but his grip on his fork visibly tensed.
San raised an eyebrow. “Oh, it’s definitely about her. The way you keep glaring at her during class could set fire to her notebook.”
“Shut up,” Jongho muttered, shoving a piece of food into his mouth to avoid saying anything more.
But his friends weren’t about to let it go.
“It’s not healthy, man,” Yunho said, leaning forward with a concerned look. “You’re obsessed. Every time she walks into a room, you lose your mind. What’s the deal?”
Jongho finally looked up, his frustration bubbling to the surface. “Everything about her bothers me,” he said sharply. “The way she talks, the way she’s always so perfect in class, the way she acts like she doesn’t care about anything—”
“Or the way she beat you?” Seonghwa interjected calmly, raising an eyebrow.
Jongho shot him a glare but didn’t respond.
“Sounds personal,” Wooyoung teased, grinning mischievously. “Are you sure this isn’t just… you know, a crush?”
The table fell silent for a moment, and Jongho froze, his expression caught somewhere between shock and denial. “What?” he said, his tone sharp.
“You heard him,” Hongjoong said, smirking slightly. “All this energy you’re putting into her… are you sure it’s not something else?”
“No,” Jongho said immediately, his voice firm. “It’s not like that.”
“Are you sure?” San asked, leaning his chin on his hand. “I mean, it’s classic, isn’t it? The whole ‘I can’t stand her, but I can’t stop thinking about her’ thing. Sounds like a crush to me.”
“I don’t like her,” Jongho snapped, his ears tinging red. “She’s annoying, and she thinks she’s better than everyone else. That’s all.”
His friends exchanged knowing looks, clearly unconvinced.
“Whatever you say,” Wooyoung said with a shrug, his grin widening. “But I’ve seen this before. Denial is step one.”
“Step two is overcompensating,” Mingi added with a laugh.
“And step three,” Yeosang said smoothly, “is realizing you’ve been an idiot the whole time.”
Jongho scowled, shoving his chair back and standing up. “You’re all delusional. There’s nothing going on.”
He grabbed his tray and stormed off, leaving his friends laughing behind him.
But as he walked away, his thoughts betrayed him. Their words replayed in his mind, and for the first time, he wondered if there was a kernel of truth in what they said. No, he told himself firmly. It’s not that. It can’t be.
Still, the idea lingered, unsettling him in a way he couldn’t quite shake.
The next day, Jongho walked into college with a heavy sense of unease. His friends’ words from the day before replayed in his mind like an annoying song he couldn’t shake. A crush? On her? The idea was absurd—laughable even. There was no way that was true.
Yet, as he walked into the classroom and his eyes instinctively searched for her, he felt a strange tightness in his chest when he saw her sitting at her desk, completely focused on her notes. She was chewing on the end of her pen, her brows slightly furrowed, clearly deep in thought.
Jongho shook his head and looked away. No. Absolutely not.
But throughout the lecture, he found his gaze drifting back to her, no matter how hard he tried to stop himself. He told himself he was just observing her—nothing more. But every time she raised her hand to answer a question or leaned over to highlight something in her book, he found himself questioning his own thoughts.
Why am I looking at her? Why does it bother me that she doesn’t even glance in my direction anymore?
He denied it over and over. It’s not that. I’m just annoyed with her. That’s all. She’s competition, and I don’t like losing. That’s it.
But then, during a group discussion, she laughed at something one of her friends said, and Jongho froze. It wasn’t loud or attention-grabbing, but something about the way her face lit up made him stop and stare for just a second too long. His chest felt… weird.
He immediately snapped his head down to his notebook, gripping his pen tightly. No. No way.
The rest of the day passed in a blur, but the thought refused to leave his mind. Every time he saw her—whether in class, in the hallway, or even at lunch—his brain kept returning to the same annoying question: Why do I care so much?
By the time the final bell rang, Jongho was more frustrated with himself than he’d ever been. He stormed out of the building, ignoring his friends’ calls, and headed straight to the gym. He needed to work off this confusion, to get his head back in the game.
But even as he threw punches at the bag, the image of her wouldn’t leave his mind. Her voice, her laugh, her determination—it all haunted him.
And as much as he tried to deny it, a small, nagging voice in the back of his head whispered the truth he didn’t want to hear.
Maybe his friends were right.
The evening was calm as YN sat across from Hanni in their favorite cafe, sipping on iced coffee and chatting about everything and nothing. The warm ambiance of the cafe felt like a comforting bubble where YN could momentarily forget about the chaos that had become her college life.
As they wrapped up their time together, Hanni gave her a playful warning. "Don’t overthink things, okay? And if that Jongho guy gives you trouble again, call me. I’ll—well, I can’t fight, but I’ll be there for moral support."
YN laughed. “Thanks, Hanni. I think I’ll be fine.”
She hailed a cab outside the cafe and slid into the backseat, giving the driver her address. The night was cool, the faint hum of the city filling the silence as the cab moved through traffic. YN rested her head against the window, her thoughts wandering as the streetlights blurred into streaks of gold.
At a red light, the cab came to a halt. Absentmindedly, she glanced out the window, her eyes tracing the silhouettes of vehicles and pedestrians passing by. Then, her gaze locked on a sleek black motorcycle that pulled up beside her.
The bike was spotless, its polished surface gleaming under the streetlights. The rider wore an all-black outfit—leather jacket, gloves, and boots—and a black helmet that seemed to swallow the light. His presence was almost magnetic, drawing her attention without effort.
And then, as if he could feel her gaze, the rider tilted his head slightly in her direction. He reached up and flipped open the visor of his helmet.
Her breath hitched.
All she could see were his eyes, but that alone was enough to captivate her. They were sharp, intense, and utterly mesmerizing, framed by long lashes that made them look almost unreal. The dim glow of the streetlights reflected in his dark irises, giving them an almost smoldering effect. It was a gaze that carried an effortless power, like he didn’t need to say a word to command attention.
It took her a moment to realize she recognized those eyes.
Jongho.
Her heart skipped a beat. He didn’t move, didn’t say a word, but the weight of his stare was enough to send a shiver down her spine. It wasn’t hostile or challenging like she was used to; it was unreadable, calm, yet undeniably strong.
She couldn’t look away.
The light turned green, and the cab started moving again, breaking the spell. YN turned her head back toward the window, her mind racing. She could still feel his gaze lingering even as the cab sped away.
What was he doing out here? Why was he on that bike? And why, of all things, did the memory of his eyes make her cheeks burn?
She shook her head, trying to dismiss the thoughts. It’s just Jongho. Stop overthinking it, YN.
But deep down, she knew she wouldn’t be able to shake the image of him so easily.
The lecture hall buzzed with excitement as the professor announced the group assignment. "Alright, everyone! Pair up into groups of two for this project. You’ll be working together for the next two weeks, so choose wisely."
YN sat up straighter in her seat, mentally scanning the room for Hanni or anyone else she could team up with. She had barely turned her head to search when someone pulled the chair next to hers with an air of finality.
She glanced over, and her stomach flipped. Jongho.
Without so much as a greeting, he dropped his bag on the desk and leaned back in his chair. "I’m your partner," he said, his tone making it clear it wasn’t up for debate.
YN blinked at him, startled. "You didn’t even ask me. What if I already had a partner?"
He raised an eyebrow, his expression indifferent. "You don’t."
Her jaw dropped slightly. "And how do you know that?"
Jongho shrugged, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the desk. "Because I got here first. Problem?"
YN’s fingers tightened around her pen. His confidence was maddening, the way he acted as if he had every right to make decisions for her. "Actually, yes, I do have a problem," she shot back.
He tilted his head slightly, a faint smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. "Too bad. We’re already partners. Let’s just get this over with."
YN stared at him, torn between frustration and disbelief. Of all people, why did he have to be the one to claim her as his partner?
She leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. "Fine. But don’t think you can just boss me around, Jongho."
He chuckled softly, the sound low and almost teasing. "Wouldn’t dream of it," he said, though the glint in his eyes suggested otherwise.
As the professor continued explaining the assignment, YN couldn’t help but glance at him out of the corner of her eye. He sat there, completely relaxed, as if he hadn’t just bulldozed his way into her plans.
Two weeks with him, she thought, resisting the urge to groan. This was going to be a long project.
As the lecture ended and the other pairs started discussing their plans, Jongho turned to YN, his expression as composed and commanding as ever.
"We’ll get started this weekend," he said, packing up his things. "Meet me outside campus. I’ll take you to my place."
YN blinked at him, confused. "Your place?"
"Yeah," he said matter-of-factly. "You live in the dorms, right? Too cramped to work there. My place is better."
She hesitated, her instincts screaming that this was a bad idea. "Wait… how am I supposed to get there?"
Jongho slung his bag over his shoulder, looking at her like the answer was obvious. "I’ll take you on my bike."
Her eyes widened. "Your bike? No way."
He raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed by her protest. "What’s the problem?"
"The problem," she said, crossing her arms, "is that you’re probably going to crash it on purpose just to mess with me."
At that, Jongho actually laughed—a low, deep sound that sent an involuntary shiver down her spine. "Seriously? You think I’d risk my bike just to scare you?"
"Yes," she said flatly.
He smirked, leaning slightly closer. "I’m not crashing my bike, YN. Trust me, I take care of it better than I take care of myself."
She gave him a skeptical look. "Still, I don’t think it’s a good idea. I can just take a cab or something."
Jongho shook his head, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Cabs take too long. Besides, this way, I know you’ll actually show up."
YN frowned, feeling cornered. She hated how he always had a way of making her feel like she didn’t have a choice. "I don’t even like bikes," she mumbled.
"Then it’s about time you got used to them," he said with a smirk. "I’ll pick you up Saturday at noon. Don’t be late."
And with that, he walked away, leaving her standing there, staring after him in disbelief.
As much as she wanted to refuse, she knew Jongho wouldn’t take no for an answer. She sighed, already dreading the weekend. This is going to be a nightmare.
Saturday rolled around, and YN begrudgingly got ready for the day. She decided to keep it casual but cute, pairing a skirt with a cozy sweater and boots. She knew Jongho would probably make some snarky comment no matter what she wore, but she didn’t care.
When she walked out to the dorm entrance, there he was—leaning against his sleek black bike, arms crossed, looking effortlessly intimidating. His leather jacket fit perfectly, and the helmet tucked under his arm completed the look.
Jongho’s eyes scanned her from head to toe, and before she could say anything, he raised an eyebrow. "Are you really wearing that skirt?"
YN frowned, her hands going to her hips. "What’s that supposed to mean? Are you shitting on my fashion choices now?"
He let out a short laugh, shaking his head. "No, it’s not that. But if you want your skirt to ride up every time we hit a bump and your legs to freeze in the wind, then go ahead. Your choice."
She blinked, caught off guard by the bluntness. "Oh, how cute," she said sarcastically. "You’re looking out for me now?"
Jongho smirked, leaning slightly closer. "Don’t get the wrong idea. I just don’t want to deal with you whining the whole ride."
She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "Fine, fine. I’ll change. You’re so thoughtful," she added with a dramatic flair of sarcasm before turning to head back inside.
As she walked back to her room, she muttered to herself. He really has a way of ruining a perfectly good morning.
As YN walked back out in her new outfit, Jongho was already waiting, his fingers tapping idly against his helmet. When he saw her, he wordlessly handed her a second helmet.
"Put it on," he said curtly.
She took it with a slight glare and slid it over her head, fumbling with the straps under her chin. It wasn’t exactly her area of expertise, and she struggled to fasten it securely.
Jongho tsked, stepping closer. "You’re hopeless," he muttered, reaching out to fix it himself. His fingers worked deftly, fastening the hook with ease. YN stood frozen as he worked, her cheeks warming at the proximity.
"There," he said, stepping back and grabbing his own helmet. "Try not to mess it up."
She rolled her eyes. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."
Jongho climbed onto the bike, motioning for her to get on. Reluctantly, she swung her leg over and settled onto the seat behind him. The bike rumbled beneath them, the vibrations already making her nervous.
"Hold on," he said, glancing over his shoulder.
"No, thanks," she replied stiffly, gripping the edges of her seat instead.
Jongho chuckled darkly. "Suit yourself."
Before she could react, he revved the engine, and the bike lurched forward. YN yelped, her hands instinctively flying to his waist as the sudden acceleration caught her off guard.
"Thought so," Jongho said smugly, his voice barely audible over the roar of the engine.
"Shut up!" she yelled back, her grip tightening as they sped down the street.
The wind whipped past them, and YN had no choice but to hold onto him as they weaved through the city. Despite her earlier reluctance, she couldn’t deny that the ride was thrilling—though she’d never admit that to Jongho.
As they rode on, she felt a mix of frustration and something she couldn’t quite place. Whatever it was, she chalked it up to the adrenaline. For now, she just wanted the ride to end without incident.
The bike came to a smooth stop in front of an upscale apartment complex. YN’s eyes widened as she took in the towering building, its modern design complete with sleek glass panels and a luxurious entrance. It was easily one of the nicest places she’d ever seen.
"You live here?" she blurted out as she climbed off the bike, staring up at the building in disbelief.
Jongho removed his helmet, shaking out his hair as he turned to her. "Yeah. Why?"
"Why?" she repeated, still gawking. "How can you afford a place like this at your age? Are you secretly some kind of heir or something?"
He smirked, clearly enjoying her reaction. "Wouldn’t you like to know?"
YN rolled her eyes, though she couldn’t help but feel even more intrigued. She followed him as he led the way to the entrance, her curiosity growing with every step.
The lobby was just as impressive as the exterior—polished floors, tasteful decor, and a front desk manned by a professional-looking concierge. She couldn’t stop herself from glancing around, taking it all in.
"This is… insane," she muttered under her breath.
Jongho glanced over his shoulder, his smirk still firmly in place. "You coming, or are you just going to stand there gawking?"
She shot him a glare and hurried to catch up, determined not to let him get under her skin any more than he already had. But as they stepped into the elevator and ascended to his floor, she couldn’t help but wonder just how much she didn’t know about him.
As the door to Jongho’s apartment swung open, YN stepped inside and took a moment to take everything in. The interior was sleek and minimalistic, with a predominantly black and gray color scheme. There was gym equipment neatly set up in one corner, a large flat-screen TV mounted on the wall, and a couch that looked both comfortable and expensive. The only thing that stood out amidst the masculine decor was a small potted plant on the windowsill and a couple of oddly cute figurines on the shelf.
"This is so… you," YN said, her voice filled with curiosity as she walked further in, her fingers lightly brushing against the edge of the sleek black counter in the kitchen. "Gym equipment in the living room, all black interiors, and—wait, are those little figurines?"
Jongho leaned against the doorframe, watching her as she explored his space. "Don’t touch those," he said, his voice calm but firm.
"Relax," she said, giving him a playful glance. "I’m just looking."
Her curiosity and the way she looked at everything with awe made Jongho pause. His arms were crossed, but his gaze softened as he observed her. There was something about the way she moved—so full of energy, yet grounded—that made it hard for him to look away.
He caught himself staring and frowned slightly. What is wrong with me? he thought.
His mind wandered to his friends' teasing words from before. Did he actually like her, or was she just annoyingly cute today? The way she had stood up to him earlier, the way she looked at him with fire in her eyes, and now the way her curiosity lit up his apartment like she belonged there—everything about her was throwing him off.
YN turned around, catching him looking at her. "What?" she asked, tilting her head slightly.
"Nothing," Jongho muttered, shaking himself out of his thoughts. "Are you done looking around, or are we actually going to work on this project?"
She raised an eyebrow, smirking a little. "I don’t know… maybe I should take a closer look at those figurines."
"Don’t even think about it," he warned, though there was a hint of amusement in his voice.
As she laughed and turned back to the desk he had cleared for their work, Jongho found himself wondering just how long he could keep denying whatever it was he was feeling.
As they sat down at the desk to start their project, Jongho found himself unexpectedly captivated by YN. At first, he had been irritated by her sharp tongue and unrelenting determination to beat him at everything. But now, as she leaned over the papers, her brows furrowed in concentration, he noticed the small things—how her hair framed her face, the way her lips pursed as she thought, and how her intelligence shone through every word she spoke.
She was explaining something about their topic, her voice steady and confident. He nodded along, but his focus wasn’t on the words—it was on her.
She’s not just smart, he thought to himself. She’s… beautiful.
He didn’t even realize he was staring until YN looked up, catching his gaze.
"Jongho?" she asked, waving a hand in front of his face. "Are you even listening?"
He blinked, quickly snapping out of his thoughts. "Yeah, of course. You were saying… something about this part of the project?"
She raised an eyebrow, clearly skeptical, but let it slide. "Right… anyway, we’ll need to gather some more sources for this section."
As the hours went on, Jongho found himself getting more comfortable around her. The way she approached problems with a mix of logic and creativity impressed him, and he started to appreciate her little quirks—the way she tapped her pen against the table when she was thinking or the way she smiled triumphantly whenever she solved something tricky.
Unbeknownst to him, his initial irritation toward her was transforming into something else entirely. He liked having her around. Her presence, her energy, the way she challenged him—it all felt… right.
But he didn’t recognize it for what it was. Not yet.
He told himself it was just admiration, just a growing respect for her intelligence. But deep down, something was changing. Jongho was falling, and he didn’t even realize it.
Jongho leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms as he scrolled through food delivery apps on his phone. "I’m starving," he muttered. "I’m thinking of ordering something. What do you want? Pizza? Burgers?"
When he didn’t hear a response, he glanced up, only to find YN wasn’t in her seat anymore. Confused, he turned his head and saw her standing in his kitchen, opening cabinets and peeking into the fridge.
"What are you doing?" he asked, getting up and walking toward her.
YN glanced over her shoulder, tilting her head slightly as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Let me cook. Don’t waste your money."
He blinked, caught off guard. "You can cook?"
"Of course," she said, pulling out a few ingredients she had found—a carton of eggs, some vegetables, and a pack of noodles. "It’s not going to be anything fancy, but it’ll be better than spending money on overpriced takeout."
Jongho leaned against the counter, crossing his arms as he watched her move around his kitchen like she owned the place. "You don’t have to do that," he said, though there was no real protest in his tone.
"I want to," YN replied simply, giving him a quick glance. "Besides, it’s the least I can do since I’m using your space for this project."
Jongho didn’t argue further. Instead, he stood there, watching her as she chopped vegetables with practiced ease. There was something oddly comforting about the sight of her cooking in his kitchen, her focus entirely on the task at hand.
He couldn’t help but smile to himself, a rare, genuine smile. This girl really knows how to surprise me, he thought.
As the aroma of the food filled the apartment, Jongho realized that for the first time in a long time, he didn’t mind sharing his space with someone else. And as much as he tried to deny it, he was starting to like the feeling.
As YN stirred the pot, she glanced over her shoulder to see Jongho still standing there, arms crossed, watching her like she was a show on TV. She raised an eyebrow.
"Why don’t you stop standing there like a statue and help me out, Jongho?" she said, a teasing lilt in her voice.
Jongho straightened up, clearly caught off guard. "Help? Me? You’re the one who insisted on cooking."
"And you’re the one with two perfectly working hands," she shot back, turning to point the spoon at him. "Come on, big guy. Chop some vegetables or something. Or do you only know how to lift weights?"
His jaw clenched slightly, more out of mock annoyance than anything else. "Fine," he muttered, stepping closer. He grabbed a knife and the vegetables she handed him.
"Careful," she said, watching him for a moment. "I don’t need you ruining my masterpiece."
Jongho gave her a sidelong glance, the corner of his mouth quirking up. "You really like bossing me around, don’t you?"
"Someone has to," she quipped, going back to her cooking.
He smirked but didn’t say anything, focusing instead on cutting the vegetables as precisely as possible. For a guy who spent most of his free time in the gym or with his friends, he was surprisingly good with a knife.
As they worked side by side in the kitchen, a strange sense of ease settled between them. The usual tension was still there, but it felt lighter somehow, almost playful.
"See?" YN said as she tossed the chopped vegetables into the pan. "Teamwork makes the dream work."
Jongho rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at his lips. "Yeah, yeah. Don’t let it go to your head."
But deep down, he couldn’t ignore how natural it felt to be here with her, working together like this. And no matter how much he tried to deny it, he liked it. Maybe a little too much.
As they sat down at the coffee table to eat, Jongho casually turned on the TV and scrolled through the streaming options. “Might as well put on something while we eat,” he said, settling on an action movie.
YN nodded, already digging into the meal she had prepared. She took a bite, and at first, everything was fine—until the spice hit her. Her face betrayed her struggle as her lips parted slightly, and her eyes darted toward her glass of water.
Jongho noticed immediately. He paused mid-bite, watching her subtle struggle. Without a word, he stood up and walked to the kitchen. YN blinked, confused for a moment, but didn’t say anything as she reached for her water.
When he returned, he was holding a small tub of ice cream and a spoon. He set it in front of her without meeting her eyes, sitting back down like it was no big deal.
She looked at the ice cream, then at him. “You… got this for me?”
“Don’t read too much into it,” he muttered, focusing on his food. “You looked like you were about to set your mouth on fire.”
Despite his dismissive tone, YN couldn’t help but smile. “Thanks,” she said softly, taking a spoonful of the ice cream. The cool sweetness instantly soothed her, and she let out a small sigh of relief.
Jongho glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, pretending to stay engrossed in the movie. But he noticed everything—the way her shoulders relaxed, the small smile playing on her lips, the way her eyes brightened as she ate.
It wasn’t the first time he had paid attention to her without realizing it, but it was the first time he felt… something. A warmth in his chest he couldn’t explain.
Why am I doing this? he thought, shoving another bite of food into his mouth as if that would quiet his mind.
Every little thing about her was starting to stick with him. The way she challenged him, the way she surprised him, the way she smiled. And now, the way she sat across from him, enjoying the ice cream he’d fetched without a second thought.
He shook his head slightly, trying to brush it off. It’s nothing, he told himself. It’s just… habit. Or pity. Or… something.
But deep down, he knew it wasn’t. Even if he wasn’t ready to admit it yet.
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Divider from @/cafekitsune
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puckingeccedentesiast · 8 months ago
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Cradle Me
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Father!Quinn x Son & Wife!Reader. Word Count: 1,1k Authorial Note: My next voted WIP! I hope you enjoy this fic as much as I did while writing it! Don’t know if it’s my best piece then. Warnings: Swearing, mentions of birth.
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Elliot Samuel Hughes came screaming into the world at 4:12 p.m., Quinn only knew his son for a matter of awed, breathless moments before the world sharpened—and chaos erupted.
Nurses swarmed you, dabbing and cleaning with sodden warm towels. A warm, slimy bundle of swaddle-blanket and baby reached your chest as the obstetrician stepped back from your glistening body. Quinn's reddened hand slipped from your grip, instinctively cradling the baby to your chest. His other hand, shaking slightly, gripped the bed's plastic rail. Leaning forward, he rested his right arm limply across your shoulder, his forehead gently touching yours as the two of you gazed down at your son.
"How’re you doing, Dad?" the obstetrician asked from the sink as he scrubbed his hands clean.
Quinn blinked, a goofy grin spreading across his face. "I feel sick... but in a good way." He laughed softly, joy plastered permanently on his face. "We created a human... that's fucking scary but awesome at the same time."
Even in your post-birth haze, a smile graced your lips. It was an awesome thing indeed. This was your person now, a culmination of Quinn and your love. Despite this baby being considered a gift, he clearly was sent to test you and Quinn’s love for each other. No parenting class could have prepared you for the unfolding chaos that was leaving the hospital and heading home. The first day at the hospital was incredible, the nurses gently guided you and Quinn in the ways of parenting. But once you left and arrived home, the learning curve turned into an aggressive crash course.
Emotions ran high for every family member. Every nap missed, messy feed, spit-up, or nappy mess that needed cleaning up frayed the string further. Quinn and you had been remarkably naïve to think that this journey would be easy, even though you’d been dreaming collectively of this moment for years.
Quinn, along with self-proclaimed uncles Elias, Brock, and JT, spent hours working on the perfect nursery for baby boy Hughes. From wall decorations to the crib and changing table—which you insisted had to be powder blue with clouds and a grassy field with cows in it—the boys poured their hearts into it. Once they had finished assembling the room and you'd let it air out due to your hatred of the smell of fresh paint, you added the final details: books, blankets, nappies, and wipes, along with baby clothes hanging neatly on tiny coat hangers.
The first night home from the hospital was powered purely by adrenaline. You and Quinn took shifts with baby boy—changing, feeding, and sometimes just comforting him to sleep. By the second and third nights, the exhaustion set in. Leaving the warmth of the bed became a Herculean effort, especially for you. The physical toll of birth weighed heavily on your body, and sustaining new life felt overwhelming.
Quinn tried his hardest to take the load off, seeing how hard you were working to make the transition smooth, though it felt futile. His patience held up remarkably well for the first four days, but by the fourth night, tension crept in. Snappish words replaced your usual playful banter, and the distance between you felt like a growing chasm. Quinn’s touch, once so comforting, now felt foreign. Exhaustion tangled both your nerves, and intimacy between the two of you became a distant memory.
That night, an abrupt “goodnight” was shared, accompanied by a peck on the cheek. You both lay there in the dark, separated by a wall of fatigue, each praying for sleep that never came, as baby boy woke again at distasteful hours of the night.
Night five was the killer. Some ungodly hour like 1:03 a.m. glared back at you from the microwave as you ambled around the kitchen for the second time that night. You’d fed him twice now, but much of the milk had come back up in spit-up. Quinn had changed baby once and had checked on him again 45 minutes earlier.
There was one distinct problem: the baby only slept when he was held. You could do as many laps around the kitchen as you wanted, Quinn could rock him for hours, but as soon as baby landed on the bassinet’s mattress, it was like laying him on lava.
"Still no luck, darlin’?" Quinn’s voice came quietly from the doorway, his tired form silhouetted by the dim light of the stairs. He met you halfway, his brow furrowed with concern.
You let out a soft, frustrated sigh. "Every time I put him down, he cries," you whispered, blinking back tears. "I’m so tired, Quinn."
He stepped closer, reaching for your hand and pressing a kiss to your knuckles. "C’mon, let’s go back to bed," he murmured, leading you gently up the stairs. Exhaustion had blurred the edges of your world, and you forced a tired smile as he kissed your hand again.
"He’s just going to cry when I put him down, Quinn," you stated tiredly as he threw back the covers for you. The softness of the bed felt like heaven against your aching body, and you settled in without a second thought.
Quinn, now shirtless, pulled baby from your arms and nestled him gently on his chest, holding him snugly as he propped himself up with pillows. He tucked you in under his arm, pulling the blankets over both of you.
"Sleep now, darlin’," he whispered, kissing the top of your head. Baby wriggled slightly in his swaddle but quickly relaxed against Quinn's warmth. "If this is how we have to do it from now on, fine."
Quinn sighed, his grip tightening around both of you. "At least we have good chiros at the rink."
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snowseasonmademe · 1 month ago
Text
Wow! Guardati!
word count: 6,003
warning ‼️: smut. kind of fulffy at the end.
pairing: lewis hamilton x black female reader
summary: an encounter with an extra flirty journalist results in the expansion of your family
tag list: @sucredreamer @irishmanwhore @dexastres @coffeevacation @goldenngt @btslover117 @kennaskorner
@leighjadeclimbedmtkilimanjaro
@jessnotwiththemess @thepointlessideas
@kjlovesbigwilo
note: let’s act like lewis has a documentary coming out okay? just for the storyline! anyway, here’s a cute little something for my lewis girls :) i really enjoyed the end of this and i hope you all like it! next is an aurélien fic, then a wilo fic and then an alejandro fic :) as always, enjoy and tell me what you think!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The atmosphere buzzed with elegance, anticipation, and a kind of glamour that could only be conjured under the Italian moonlight. Florence’s old-world beauty was the perfect backdrop for a night like this—timeless, opulent, and humming with flashbulbs. The red carpet shimmered under the weight of the moment. Lewis’ latest passion project, F1, was premiering tonight, and the turnout had been nothing short of cinematic. Everywhere you turned were tuxedos and gowns, laughter softened by champagne bubbles, camera lenses blinking like stars just inches from your face.
And through all the spectacle, Lewis hadn’t let go of you once.
You were still high on love—on the marriage, on the promise of forever. Five months into your union and it still felt like you were floating, like each morning you woke up next to him was the start of something new. He kept you close the entire night, fingers tracing soft, reassuring lines over the fabric at your waist, pulling you in like you were the anchor in the sea of lights and attention. His hand never strayed from you—always grounded, always present. There was a reverence to the way he held you, like you were both part of the show and entirely above it.
He looked stunning, of course. That effortless Lewis Hamilton kind of stunning—tailored black tux with crisp lapels, the soft glint of jewelry against his skin, and that signature calm that made the loudest rooms feel intimate. But tonight, it wasn’t just about the way he looked. It was about the pride in his eyes. His movie. His vision. His voice finally made cinematic.
And you… you were the dream incarnate beside him.
Your dress was bold—a strapless red that kissed your curves in all the right places, tailored within a breath of scandal but wrapped in pure class. It shimmered under the flash of every camera, the neckline a delicate frame to your collarbones and shoulders, the hem grazing just the right amount of leg when you walked. You were red wine in silk. Velvet flame. He hadn’t stopped staring at you since you stepped out of the car, his eyes lingering like a man deeply, wildly in love.
The photographers had eaten it up. Posing together, Lewis’ hand steady on your waist, your smiles in sync—it was art, really. The kind of love that makes even the most jaded paparazzi pause behind the lens. After the photos, it was time to make the rounds—answer questions, shake hands, show face. Lewis kept his hand locked with yours as he guided you from one cluster of journalists to the next, answering questions about the movie, the creative process, his transition into film.
And, of course, about marriage.
“She’s been incredible,” he said more than once, nodding toward you with the kind of smile that made your stomach flutter. “Honestly, I don’t know how I did any of this without her.”
You tried to stay quiet in the background, but Lewis made sure you were never just an accessory. His answers were laced with love, and his glances in your direction were nothing short of devout. The glimmer of your wedding rings caught the light more than once.
It had been smooth sailing—until you approached him.
The flirty journalist.
He was standing at the end of a velvet rope, credentials swinging from his neck, mic already raised before you even reached him. Tall, tan, and smug with confidence, he had sun-kissed skin and chestnut curls that framed a chiseled face. His hazel eyes sparkled with something cocky, like he was more interested in the fantasy than the facts. His suit was sharp, but his smile was sharper.
As soon as you and Lewis stepped up, he zeroed in on you.
“Wow, guardati!” (Wow! look at you!) he said with a flirtatious grin, eyes unapologetically raking over your silhouette. “Mrs. Hamilton, you look absolutely gorgeous tonight. Are you enjoying yourself?”
You felt the weight of the attention immediately, felt it coat your skin like heat. But your years beside Lewis—your years of practice with poise—had trained you well. You didn’t falter. You smiled, nodded, poised like a diamond. You were used to the attention, used to being watched, admired, and occasionally tested. But something about this man’s tone felt a little too eager, a little too personal for the setting.
Still, you knew the drill: smile, thank him, and redirect. It wasn’t the first time you’d had to politely deflect on red carpets.
But before you could respond, Lewis stepped in.
His voice was smooth, but the tension in his jaw was subtle and unmistakable. “She does look absolutely stunning tonight, doesn’t she?” he said, eyes fixed on the journalist like a man quietly staking a claim. His hand squeezed your waist, fingers a little firmer now, pulling you ever so slightly closer to him.
The message was clear. Crystal.
You smiled through it, gently brushing a loose curl away from your face, giving the camera a glimpse of your glistening wedding stack. “I’m honored to be here with my husband,” you said, deliberately drawing out the last word like honey on your tongue. “He’s worked so hard on this project. I’ve seen the hours, the passion. I’m just so proud he finally gets to share it with the world.”
Your voice was calm, collected, elegant. But you didn’t miss the way the journalist’s eyes flicked back to your neckline, or the way Lewis stiffened ever so slightly beside you.
“And Lewis,” the man continued, clearly unfazed by the shift in energy—or maybe just too bold to care, “you’re looking sharp as ever. Marriage suits you. Has Y/N been helping with the wardrobe lately?”
Lewis didn’t miss a beat. He smiled—tight, amused, challenging.
“She actually picked out all my jewelry tonight,” he said, holding up both hands to show off the glint of his watch and the rings that adorned his fingers. His wedding band sparkled the brightest.
“She makes great fashion choices,” the journalist added, casting another glance your way—lingering, greedy.
And that was it.
That was the moment Lewis’ patience ran out.
He tilted his head slightly, a sharp motion almost too subtle to catch. His eyes narrowed just enough to shift the air between them. The sweetness in his smile dissolved into something darker, more pointed.
“Did you wanna marry her too, or—?”
The question was tossed like a blade disguised as a joke. Your lips twitched, stifling a laugh as your gaze dropped to the carpet for a moment. You could feel the heat blooming at your cheeks—part embarrassment, part delight.
The journalist blinked. “No, no,” he stammered, taken off guard but trying to recover, “she just looks so beautiful, I can’t help—”
“You are not her type” Lewis cut in smoothly, voice low and final. “Enjoy the movie man.”
And just like that, he gently guided you away, a protective hand on the small of your back, shielding you with the strength of someone who knew exactly what he had—and refused to let anyone else forget it.
You kept a soft smile on your face as you walked off the red carpet, the sound of your heels echoing lightly on the stone steps beneath you. Lewis’ hand remained steady at the small of your back, guiding you with that same mix of intention and tenderness that always made you feel like the only woman in the world. The flashes were still going off, camera bulbs catching the sharp lines of his jaw, the glossy sheen of your lips, the way your bodies curved toward each other like you were made to fit—like he belonged nowhere else but beside you.
But even as you kept your composure, your mind was still spinning a little. That journalist. The way he looked at you, the audacity in his smile, the not-so-subtle flirtation that slipped between his words like smoke. It wasn’t your first time being flirted with in front of Lewis—but this had felt different. Bold. Purposeful.
Still, you didn’t let it show. You walked gracefully back into the venue, back through the velvet-lined corridor that smelled faintly of fresh paint and expensive perfume. His fingers twitched once at your waist but stayed respectful, possessive only in the way he tilted his body just enough to keep you between him and the wall.
Only once you were in the elevator did you allow yourself to break the silence. The doors glided shut with a soft chime, cutting you off from the chaos behind you. The moment felt suspended, like the city was holding its breath.
You giggled, the sound light, teasing, deliberately casual. “Was he actually okay?” you asked, tilting your face toward him, your cheek resting briefly against his arm. “That was kinda crazy babe.”
Lewis didn’t answer right away. He inhaled, jaw clenched just slightly before his shoulders dropped and his voice came out low and steady.
“He must’ve lost his mind,” he muttered. “That guy’s fuckin’ crazy. Who talks like that to someone’s wife? On camera?”
You smiled again, tracing little circles against the fabric of his sleeve with your thumb. “He was kind of cute though.”
He turned his head slowly to look at you, mouth parting as if to say something, but what came out was laughter. Deep, amused, slightly exasperated.
“Y/N, don’t joke like that,” he said with a playful warning in his voice. “Even if you did find him cute—which I know you didn’t—he can’t dress, and he smells like pepper. Like, full-on crushed black peppercorns. Who wears powder yellow to a movie premiere? In linen? Is it 1973?”
Your laughter burst out before you could stop it, sharp and bright in the small space of the elevator. “You’re so mean”
He smirked, rolling his eyes. “Nah. I just have taste. Can’t have my wife being hit on by a man dressed like a lost Easter egg.”
You leaned into his side and sighed, smiling to yourself. You could feel his arm shift as he brought his hand up to your waist again, this time resting his fingers just beneath your ribs. There was a comfort in it—protective, proud, and just the tiniest bit possessive. But not in the way that smothered. No, this was different. He was reminding you that he was here, that you were his, and that anyone with eyes could see how lucky he was.
~~~~~~
The rest of the night unfolded in golden, surreal fragments.
The lights in the screening room dimmed slowly, and the room fell into a silence that was reverent. The movie began without any grand title cards or booming score. Just the hum of an engine, the sound of breath through a helmet, the stillness before the chaos.
You saw the world through Lewis’ eyes—literally. The camera moved like a body. Like his body. You were pulled into the cockpit, thrown into corners, accelerating, braking, dodging raindrops and grit, hearing radio chatter and sudden silence. It was breathtaking. Terrifying. Intimate.
Every flick of the steering wheel was a decision. Every race was a war. And beneath it all, you could feel the unrelenting pressure—the constant negotiation between perfection and catastrophe.
And then came the personal parts.
The montages of his childhood. Footage of him karting. Shaky home videos with his father. Archive clips of headlines that vilified him, commentators dismissing him, critics dissecting his every move.
You held your breath during those moments.
Lewis didn’t move beside you. His posture stayed the same, but you saw the tension in the set of his jaw. The way his hand tightened slightly around yours as a clip played of a journalist calling him “too flashy,” “too emotional,” “too political.”
And then came the joy. His first win. His championships. The scenes of him working with his engineers, pushing his team to be better, standing at the front of protests, speaking up when everyone else stayed silent.
By the end of the film, you weren’t just emotional—you were transformed.
You turned to look at him as the credits rolled. There was a stillness in his face, but his eyes were soft. Brighter than they had been all night.
“I’m so proud of you,” you whispered, your fingers tracing the back of his hand.
He didn’t say anything right away. He just leaned over and kissed your temple, long and slow, breathing you in like you were the only safe place in the world.
~~~~~~
Later, you were home.
The bathroom light spilled out across the marble tile, casting a soft glow that made your skin look warm and golden. You were standing in front of the mirror, unclasping your earrings with a tired sort of grace. Your feet ached, your body was starting to slow, but you still looked stunning—red gown hugging your curves, lip gloss smudged just enough to be human.
You heard him before you felt him—his bare feet on the tile, the soft rustle of his jacket hitting the armchair. Then his arms wrapped around your waist, his hands spreading wide over your stomach as he pulled you back into him. His lips found the slope of your back, trailing kisses up your spine. Gentle. Thoughtful.
“I loved the movie baby,” you murmured, your eyes meeting his reflection in the mirror. “I know I already said it, but… it was so good. I think—” you yawned mid-sentence, covering your mouth—“I think I wanna watch it again tomorrow.”
He chuckled, the sound low in your ear. “We can watch it again. Maybe we’ll invite Mr. Wife Stealer too.”
You laughed, turning in his arms and walking slowly to the edge of the bathtub, sitting with a little sigh.
“Can you take my shoes off?” you asked, looking at him through tired lashes.
He raised a brow as he followed you over and knelt, one knee touching the cool tile. “Babe, I already said yes,” you said, teasing. “Now can you take off my shoes?”
You smiled and let your head fall back as he unstrapped your heels one by one, his touch reverent. When the first one came off, he cradled your foot in his palm and began to massage it slowly, pressing into the arch like he’d done it a thousand times before. Your mouth fell open in a quiet moan of relief.
“This color makes you look really sexy” he murmured. “If I’d known this was what Ferrari red did to me, I would’ve signed the contract years ago.”
You opened your eyes and looked down at him, his face bathed in the amber light, devotion etched into every line. He moved to the other foot, giving it the same care, same attention.
Your voice came softly. “Do you think he would’ve still flirted if I was pregnant?”
He paused, just briefly. Met your eyes.
“I mean… unless he’s secretly from a scouser, probably not,” he said finally. “But clearly we never know. I would think the big ass ring on your hand would be enough.”
You pulled your foot from his hand gently and shifted, rising up to straddle his knee. He leaned back slightly, one hand instinctively catching your waist.
“It’s not too soon for kids, right?” you asked, fingering the open collar of his shirt, feeling the warmth of his skin just beneath. “I know you said you wanted to wait until you retire, but…” you trailed off, eyes searching his face, voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t want another cute Italian journalist flirting with me.”
Lewis looked at you for a long moment. Then he smiled—slow, certain.
“I wouldn’t say it’s too soon,” he murmured, brushing your cheek with the back of his hand. “We’re gonna be married forever. Might as well get started now.”
You didn’t say anything. Just smiled, slow and private, like you’d just made up your mind about something important.
Then, wordlessly, you stood and reached for his hand.
He took it.
You led him to the bedroom.
The room was dim—near dark. Only one candle burned in the far corner of the room, a slim, flickering flame perched on the mantel above the fireplace. Its soft golden light cast long shadows across the walls, dancing over the sheets, painting you both in warm amber and deep, stretching shadows. It smelled faintly of bergamot and wax. Quiet. Private. Tranquil.
Lewis reached for you with both hands and pulled you into him like he couldn’t bear even a sliver of distance. The kiss was immediate—no teasing, no gentle buildup. Full-bodied. Deep. Tongue and breath and heat. His mouth moved over yours with a hunger that felt old and familiar, but new somehow too. Urgent and tender all at once.
As you kissed, his hands moved. Purposeful, but never rushed. He undressed you both right there—standing in the center of the room like no one had ever taught him patience but you. His shoes came off first. Then your gown, sliding down your body in one red whisper. His socks, his belt. His pants pooled around his ankles. Your bra, unhooked with a single snap of his fingers. His shirts—both layers—peeled away to reveal warm, waiting skin. His boxers. And finally, your panties. Every layer felt like it mattered. Like a ritual. A vow.
He walked backward toward the bed, never once breaking the kiss. He held your face, your jaw, your shoulders, like you might disappear if he didn’t touch enough of you. Your knees bumped into the mattress, and before you could lower yourself, he pulled you into his chest and let both your bodies fall together. The bed caught you, the sheets cool beneath your backs, and in one fluid motion, he flipped you over—settling himself above you, kneeling between your thighs.
He wasted no time. His lips descended to your throat, and his mouth opened against your skin. He kissed, then sucked—soft at first, then harder, then slow again—leaving deep bruises that bloomed like ink beneath your skin. He moved lower. Your collarbones, your chest. He took his time with your breasts, kissing them like they deserved worship, like they were speaking a language only he could understand. His mouth was soft and warm, and his toy—already thick and lengthening—rested against your thigh. It twitched when you gasped. Hardened when your hands found his hair and tangled, fingers tightening with every graze of his tongue.
You could feel how aroused he was. Not just in his body, but in his intention. Every breath, every pause, every pass of his thumb over your hip bones screamed one thing: I want to get you pregnant tonight. And not by accident. By design.
He looked at you like he was etching you into his memory. Not the kind that fades—but the kind you revisit every night before sleep. He wanted you to remember this too. So when your belly was swollen and your feet were sore and you felt like a stranger in your own body, you’d be able to close your eyes and remember this moment: the way he made you feel like a goddess while planting something inside you that would change your life forever.
You ground your hips against him, needy, aching, seeking relief. His mouth curved against your stomach as he kissed down your torso, slow and indulgent.
“Relax baby,” he whispered against your skin. “I’ll give you what you want.”
The way he said it—low, sure, almost reverent—made your toes curl.
He kept kissing lower. Over your navel, down the soft skin of your pelvis. Then, finally, he reached your center and didn’t hesitate. He spread your thighs wide, his hands anchoring your hips like he needed them open. Needed them generous. Needed you to be his in this way.
And then he devoured you.
His tongue moved in slow, languid strokes—no rush, no teasing. Just firm, unbroken pressure that melted your spine and made your mouth fall open. He licked you with full attention, full intention. And when he sucked—low, soft, rhythmic—you whimpered, hand flying to the back of his head. His braids slipped between your fingers like silk. He hummed against your clit, the vibration thrumming through you like music.
One hand left your hip and slipped down—he pressed a single finger into you, deep and unhurried. You gasped. It curled, then stroked, then curled again. Right against the spot that made your legs tremble.
He never broke his pattern. Mouth on your clit. Finger inside you. Controlled. Certain.
“Lewis,” you whispered, breath coming fast. “Oh—Lewis, you’re gonna make me cum.”
Still, he didn’t stop. He didn’t even pause. That same pace, same pull, same promise.
And when you came—when your body finally gave in and clenched around his hand—he groaned against you like he was the one being undone. You shook beneath him, voice catching, thighs closing around his head as if trying to keep him there. You didn’t mean to. It was instinct. Desire. Need.
He didn’t let up until you sagged into the sheets, boneless and dazed.
And all he could think, as he looked up at you—eyes heavy, lips glistening, chin wet with your release—was I can’t wait for her to cum on my dick like that.
He came back up to your face slowly, like a man drunk on something sacred. His lips were soft, parted and glistening. His chin slick with the mess he made of you, your sweetness still clinging to his skin. He smelled like you now—warm and musky, earthy and raw, the scent of sex thick between your bodies.
Your chest rose and fell, trying to catch the breath he’d already stolen. You let out a soft laugh, your fingers curling loosely around his shoulders. “This is why your beard’s ginger.”
He smiled, the corner of his mouth twitching upward before it spread across his face, wide and boyish. A little smug. But affectionate.
“I wouldn’t care if your pussy dyed my beard green,” he said, voice gravel-thick and low. “I’d still eat you.”
And then—before you could respond—his mouth was on yours again, like the words had only been a bridge back to your lips. He kissed you like he missed you. Like he’d been gone for days. Like tasting you wasn’t enough—he needed you under his tongue, around his dick, under his weight, everywhere.
He kissed you until your lips were sore. Until your thighs started to tremble again. Until your breath came in shallow gasps.
His mouth trailed down from your lips to your jaw, your throat, your collarbone. Then back up. He sucked at the edge of your bottom lip again before dragging it slowly between his teeth. His tongue flicked behind your earlobe, then his teeth grazed it—gently, then not. You whimpered, hips shifting on instinct as he ground his length against your clit. Slow. Deliberate. Unrelenting.
The weight of his dick pressing into your center was torture. Your body jolted, sensitive and swollen. And he knew what he was doing. He ground against you like he was memorizing your pulse, like he was setting it.
Your fingers curled into his back. “I can’t wait any longer,” you breathed. “Put it in, baby. Please. I need it.”
He lifted his head, eyes dark with desire. “You need it?” he asked, as if confirming. Then he smiled again—this time with hunger.
And he gave you what you wanted.
He reached down, letting your hand guide him. You both looked down between your bodies to where you held him—thick, hard, veined and leaking. He was already ready. More than ready. He pressed the flushed head of his dick against your entrance and slid inside with one, slow, devastating stroke.
He didn’t stop until he was all the way in. Until his hips were flush with yours and your pussy was wrapped around him like a vise.
A gasp tore from your throat. Your hands flew to his arms. You were full. Stretched in every direction. But it felt so good. So right.
He dropped his head into the crook of your neck, breathing hard, moaning low against your skin. “Fuuuck,” he groaned, like the heat of you melted something inside him. He stayed buried there for a moment, barely moving, like he wanted to memorize this exact feeling—of being surrounded, held, welcomed.
You were trembling already.
“Give it to me, Lewis,” you whispered, voice shaking. “Put a baby in me. Right now.”
That pulled a growl from his chest.
He started to move. Slow and smooth. His hips rolled forward and back with perfect control. Like a wave. Dragging the thick length of him along every sensitive inch inside you.
Your mouth fell open. Your hands slid up to cradle his face, making him look at you. You wanted to watch him fuck you. Wanted to see what he looked like inside you, lost in you.
His eyes were glassy and dark, and he didn’t look away.
Your body was making the most obscene wet sounds—loud and raw and needy. Every stroke of him was met with a squelch of your arousal, and it only turned you on more.
“I fuckin’ love that sound,” he said, never breaking eye contact. “Fuck.”
You whimpered when his fingers found your breast. He rolled your nipple between his thumb and forefinger, soft at first, then harder, pinching until your back arched. “Mmmm yes,” you moaned, voice high and stretched.
His forehead rested against yours, and for a second, it felt like you were floating. Drifting in the heat of each other’s breath.
Then he paused—only long enough to reach beneath you and slide a pillow under your hips.
The second he started again, you felt the difference.
The angle changed everything. He was right there now, hitting your spot again and again. Slow and steady, but deep and hard. Every thrust made you cry out, body jerking.
“Ohhhhhh my God, Lewis!” you shouted, nails digging into his arms.
The slap of his skin against yours echoed in the room—wet and urgent, a rhythm that stole your thoughts.
You were gone.
He was breathing hard now, muttering curses into your shoulder. “Can’t believe how wet you are for me…”
He shifted again, and suddenly your leg was higher on his shoulder, bent back nearly to your chest. He gripped your thigh with one hand, the other dropping to your throat.
He was hitting your g spot.
Dead on. Over and over.
Hard and slow. Just how you liked it.
His fingers wrapped around your neck—tight enough to hold, soft enough not to hurt.
“You want me to get you pregnant baby? Huh?” he asked, breath fanning over your face. “You have cum for me first. I can only get you pregnant if you cum for me.”
His voice was laced with heat and command.
He felt it.
And he fucked you harder.
The room blurred. You couldn’t hear your own screams. You only felt him. Felt how his dick dragged against every sensitive part of you. How his fingers squeezed just enough to keep you open, gasping, eyes locked on his.
Then it hit, your body obeyed.
Your orgasm rushed toward you like a freight train. Your eyes widened. Your thighs started to shake.
You came with a cry that scraped your throat raw, body convulsing as your walls clamped down around him. You couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t speak. You only felt the pleasure explode and ripple through you like fire.
“Fuck, that’s it—fuck!” he growled, fucking you through it, his own breath falling apart.
His pace stuttered. You felt his legs tense, his rhythm grow erratic.
With the last thread of strength, you grabbed his face, eyes wide and desperate. “Give it to me, Lewis pleaaassee” you begged. “Cum inside me. Please. Give me a baby.”
That pushed him over.
He moaned loud—raw and unrestrained—and slammed into you with a final, bone-deep thrust.
And he came.
You felt it. Hot. Deep. Endless.
You could feel how much more he gave you this time—thick ropes of him spilling into you, pulsing with every twitch of his dick. Your body opened up to him, holding every drop.
He stayed like that, buried inside, chest heaving against yours. Then he collapsed fully, his body resting on top of you. Heavy and solid. Safe.
You kissed his temple, his cheek, the corner of his mouth. Still grinding gently, still chasing the feeling.
He chuckled, eyes still closed. “Give me five minutes, baby,” he murmured. “We’ll go again in a minute.”
And he kept his word.
He fucked you everywhere.
On the carpet beside the bed, your legs over his shoulders again as he whispered filthy things into your ear.
In the closet, with one of your dresses still hanging behind you, his fingers dug into your hips while you bit down on his shoulder to keep from screaming.
In the hallway, where he took you standing up, pressed against the wall, his hand covering your mouth as you whimpered.
In the foyer, bent over the console table, your hands flat against the glass while he drove into you from behind.
In the kitchen, on the cold marble counter, where your back arched and your legs shook as he licked your nipples and fucked you slow.
In the living room, on the couch, on the floor, on top of the throw pillows.
And finally, against the living room window. His hands gripping your waist, your breath fogging the glass, the night pressing in around you like a curtain. No one could see. But it wouldn’t have mattered.
By the end of it, your mind was blank.
Your body wrecked.
Your legs barely working.
But you knew. You felt it deep in your core, heavy and full and certain.
This pregnancy only needed one try.
And tonight had been it.
You were pregnant.
~~~~~~
Six months later:
November. The São Paulo Grand Prix.
The sky above Interlagos was a wide, searing blue, streaked with the barest wisps of clouds. The sun was high and golden, baking the asphalt and flooding every corner of the paddock with a kind of electric heat. The Brazilian crowd was still roaring, their cheers echoing long after the checkered flag had waved. Flags flew, champagne glistened in the air, and camera flashes lit the pit lane like tiny bolts of lightning.
And there you were.
Plump. Glowing. Radiant in a way that stopped people mid-sentence.
Six months pregnant.
Your belly rounded out the silk of your dress, soft and prominent beneath the hand you kept cradled over it—like a natural extension of your body, like you were made to carry this baby. The swell of your breasts pushed against the neckline of your dress, full and sensitive. Your skin was dewy, warm, bronzed by the sun and made even more vibrant by the joy in your face. Your lips were painted a soft, glossy pink, your edges laid, curls pinned back with a silver clip that glittered when it caught the light.
You looked exactly like what you were—loved. Wanted. Cherished beyond measure.
The day couldn’t have gone better. Lewis had taken pole position yesterday and sealed it today with a win so commanding it had people whispering about vintage Hamilton magic. He climbed out of the car with his arms raised, fists clenched in triumph, confetti in his hair, champagne in his mouth, and the first thing he’d done was point toward you.
The cameras caught it. You, smiling from the edge of the crowd, your hand pressed to your stomach. Your other hand lifted in a small wave, tears in your eyes, unable to stop grinning.
That was how the world found out.
A baby.
His baby.
You’d waited six months. Not out of secrecy, but because it was yours first. Something sacred and quiet, just for the two of you. After that night—the one that changed everything—you’d known right away. You felt it the next morning in the way your body ached, in the way your insides felt different. Like something had taken root.
But just to be sure, you and Lewis kept trying. Again. And again. And again. For four weeks straight. He couldn’t keep his hands off you. Morning, afternoon, middle of the night. In the shower. In the car. In the kitchen. He was a man on a mission, and the mission was getting you pregnant.
You laughed now, remembering the look on his face the morning the test turned positive. That glassy, soft-eyed smile. That whispered, “I knew it.” The way he’d kissed your stomach for fifteen straight minutes, whispering things to it like it could already hear him.
He hadn’t stopped kissing you since.
And now—here you were. Walking through the paddock hand in hand with your husband. Husband. The word still made your heart race.
His fingers were laced with yours, thumb brushing the back of your hand every few seconds like he couldn’t help it. He was still in his race suit, peeled down to his waist, fireproof shirt clinging to his skin, hair damp from champagne and sweat. The gold chain at his neck caught the light. He wore his win like it was stitched into his skin. But more than that, he wore you.
He didn’t let go of your hand once.
People kept stopping to congratulate you—soft smiles, gentle hugs, nods of admiration. Engineers, journalists, even rival drivers. Some offered a light touch to your arm, others beamed at Lewis and shook his hand with firm, proud grips. Everyone seemed to feel the magic between you. The way your hand never left your belly. The way Lewis kept stealing glances at it. At you.
“Baby’s first race win,” someone joked.
Lewis grinned. “First of many.”
Your steps slowed as you walked past the Mercedes garage. The air shifted slightly. You felt it before you saw him.
The journalist.
The one from that red carpet in Italy. Young. Handsome. The same dark eyes. The same sharp jaw. He was standing beside the pit wall, notebook in hand, headset slung low around his neck. This time he didn’t wear a smirk. No cocky tilt to his chin. No hungry eyes trailing over your frame.
He looked at you. Just once.
And you looked back.
Not with disdain. Not even with warning. Just a soft, knowing smile. The kind that said: You could never have handled me. Not like he does.
And maybe he understood that now. Maybe that’s why he didn’t smile back—just lowered his head in a respectful nod.
Lewis saw the whole thing.
And the way his jaw ticked made you tighten your grip on his hand, thumb tracing soothing circles into the back of it.
You leaned over and whispered, “Relax. He learned his lesson.”
Lewis didn’t respond right away. He just slid his arm around your waist, slow and possessive, resting his palm flat across the curve of your belly. His thumb stroked the side of it like he was drawing a boundary.
“He better have,” he muttered, mouth brushing your temple. “Next time he so much as thinks about you, I’ll remind him whose last name you’re carrying.”
You smiled and turned into his chest, letting the sound of the paddock blur around you. The crowd. The engines. The hum of celebration. None of it mattered.
He kissed the top of your head, then your cheek, then the corner of your mouth. “You hungry?”
“For you or for food?” you teased, and he groaned softly against your ear.
“Both,” he said, and you could hear the smirk in his voice. “But I’ll feed you first.”
He helped you into the hospitality suite, kept one hand on your lower back the whole time like he was guiding royalty. You knew once the sun dipped and the sky turned dusky and rose-tinted, he’d take you back to the hotel. Strip you down slowly. Kiss every stretch mark, every swollen curve. Run his lips along your belly and whisper promises against the skin.
Because even after the win, after the podium, after the cheers—
You were his prize.
And he was yours.
Forever.
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caffeinatedvigilantewriter · 9 months ago
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So the world is full of problems and being a naive 12 yo, Dani thinks she can fix those problems.
So she follows the best example.
Red hood
And she becomes a crime boss.
And she’s far better than anyone would think. Discreetly taking over various mafias around the world.
Eventually, the anti ecto acts are put in place worldwide.
So Dani (17) and Jazz (21)move to the only place that has citizens that would willingly lie to the government. Danny is in the ghost zone, attempting to evacuate all ghosts on earth dnd then get to work trying to dismantle the AEA. A process that could take over a year or so.
So Dani moves most of her forces to Gotham.
In my mind, Dani’s mobster name is Fantasma btw and her henchmen/loyal workers are called the Draugur.
But Gotham is cursed and over run with violent ghosts, and because Jazz has collage (transferred from Central Collage) and has to keep a job she can’t handle the ghosts.
So Dani is now moonlighting as the vigilante Wraith.
And Jazz is making her go to school during the day (Gotham academy)
While she’s in Gotham, Fantasma catches the attention of the bats because they’re not going to miss what is obviously a big player with a reputation coming into Gotham.
So they send a bat to go undercover
Damian
Damian is like 17 and has just transitioned out of Robin (you can decide whos Robin in his place) and is now (what we vigilante you what him to be, but I’m using Nocturne in this post)
For his first solo mission, he goes undercover as a henchman in the Draugurs. (He wears a mask so he doesn’t get discovered at a Wayne/bat). The only information the bats have is that Fantasma is around his age.
Unsurprisingly, he’s really good at undercover work.
He (undercover name is Crow) quickly makes his way up the ranks.
And he eventually meets the boss Fantasma and becomes her right hand.
And eventually begins to fall for her.
At the same time, he’s trying to catch the new antihero Wraith, who is a very flirty pain in the butt. He’s also been assigned to be the partner of a new student in his class, Danielle, who is incredibly ditzy and clumsy. But she’s not stupid, Damian knows better than to assume that. Especially when she scores highly than him on their geography test.
Basically an entire love hexagon AU including
- henchmen x boss
- vigilante x vigilante/antihero
- academic rivals AU
Relationship guide
Fantasma x Crow- boss that trust her second hand with her life despite not know in his real name. Henchman that is slowly catching feelings and becoming very guilty for lying to her
Nocturne x Wraith- vigilante is getting increasingly irritated by the new Antihero, who thinks the vigilante is hot and flirts with him the entire time they’re together
Dani x Damian- klutzy, clumsy, and popular student ends up having a rivalry with perfect, cold, and outcast over grades and tests. They hate each other.
I love this prompt, and there’s so much I could add to this.
Any thoughts? Would love to hear them!! :))
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dhddmods · 29 days ago
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You are not immune to being intersexist. Being anti-mutilation & anti-hormone abuse isn't enough.
We are so sick of radfems/TERFS/SWERFs and perisex queer people claiming to be intersex allies, while perpetuating intersexist ideals. We have had to correct some of these behaviors within ourselves over the years (ie; making intersexist jokes, using the H-slur while being unaware it was a slur, etc), because its so ingrained in society.
You are not immune to spreading intersexism. If you are still doing those things, learn now to stop and do better.
-
Gatekeeping intersex variations & traits is intersexist.*
Calling intersex variations & traits conditions, disorders of sexual development/DSDs, urogenital deformities/disorders, hormone disorders, or chromosomal disorders is intersexist.**
Claiming intersex people can be sorted into a binary system ("female intersex" & "male intersex") is intersexist.***
Using f-ta (*u) or b--ddel (*ae) is intersexist and a slur.
Using h-rmaphrodite/h-rm (*e) - yes, even on animals - is intersexist and a slur. Use cosexed or intersex instead.****
Labelling altersex or cosexed characters as "intersex" is intersexist. Treating intersex variations as synonymous with cosexed is intersexist.
Identifying as "transintersex" is intersexist. Intersex & perisex are not a choice. Use one of the countless other terms to describe transitioning to mixed or null sex traits instead.
Lying about being intersex to get access to sex affirming care is intersexist, and isn't any "safer" than outing yourself as trans or altersex.
Claiming that intersex people can't be trans, or gatekeeping how they identify, is intersexist.
Mocking menstruation & pregnancy in people who aren't female-perceived (ie; mocking mpreg) is intersexist.
Calling intersex traits "too complicated" to bring up in basic biology class and sex education is intersexist. It only takes an extra 30 minutes to teach the basics of it.
Using small dick, no balls/small balls, or low T as insults is intersexist. Mocking people for having the "wrong" secondary sex traits (breasts, hips, muscle mass, body/facial hair, voice pitch, etc) is intersexist.*****
Calling HRT feminizing and masculinizing is intersexist. Using AFAB/AMAB interchangeably with mulleripathian/wolffipathian is intersexist.
-
*Intersex describes a wide spectrum. This includes penile traits, urethral traits, ambiguous genitals, the agenital spectrum, reproductive traits, hormonal traits, and chromosomal variations. It is not just "mixed parts." You can read about them in our guide.
**Yes, intersex people often have comorbid disorders, but that does not make their intersexuality a disorder. Yes, sometimes (keyword SOMETIMES) urethral traits need surgery in order to urinate, but that doesn't make it a deformity, it just means that evolution isn't a conscious being.
***Yes, some intersex people have mostly mulleripathian traits or mostly wolffipathian traits - but that doesn't change the fact that they are intersex. Also, some intersex people are extremely ambiguous. Are you going to tell a person with XX-XY chimerism, ovotestes, a uterus, and a penis that they can be categorized into a binary sex system?
****Use cosexed when referring to animals who primarily have mixed sex traits (ie; slugs, snails, certain bugs, etc.) Use intersex when referring to animals who have a mulleripathian & wolffipathian variant, but fall outside of that (ie; a gynandromorph beetle or bird, a hyena born without a penis or pseudophallus, a calico cat with XXY chromosomes, etc.)
*****All of those are intersex traits. In fact, all of those things are genderqueer/varsex (trans, GNC, altersex, etc) traits too. Joking about people's bodies in general is just bigoted and disrespectful, why are you using body shaming as a punchline anyways?
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videolari · 3 months ago
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ISTANBUL OBESİTY CENTER (3)
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amirawrah · 1 month ago
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⭐︎You move me
with JUDE BELLINGHAM⭐︎REQUESTED BY ANON!
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synopsis: A chance encounter in a quiet Madrid studio turns into something neither of you expected—but everything you didn’t know you needed.
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Madrid mornings had a rhythm of their own—slow and golden, with the hum of scooters in the distance, early cafés clinking glasses, and the sun climbing steadily over the terracotta roofs. Your alarm always went off at 6:15 a.m., just before the city fully woke. By 6:30, you were sipping matcha in your tiny balcony kitchen, watching the light shift through your lemon tree.
And by 7:00 a.m., you were at the studio.
The yoga studio wasn’t flashy. Tucked into a side street off Calle de Fuencarral, it was all soft lighting, eucalyptus towels, and high windows that cracked open to let in the scent of the morning bakeries nearby. You loved it here. Your sanctuary, your routine. Your breath.
What you didn’t love were the last-minute sign-ups.
So when you saw a new name on the roster for your 7:15 a.m. “Strength + Flow” session—a name scribbled in barely readable all caps by your receptionist, Mari—you frowned.
JUDE. No last name. Just Jude. Paid in cash.
Tourist, you thought. Or worse—a gym bro who’d been dragged in by someone’s girlfriend. The class was already half full when you walked in, barefoot, with your water bottle tucked under your arm and your hair in a loose bun.
“Good morning, everyone,” you said softly, settling at the front. “Today’s flow is going to challenge your core, your breath, and maybe your ego a little. Sound good?”
Scattered chuckles. Nods.
Then the door opened.
And he walked in.
Tall, brown skin glowing under the skylight, wearing a white tee that was already clinging slightly to his collarbone from the Madrid heat. He looked around, then his eyes landed on you. And he smiled—soft, a little crooked, warm enough to melt a glacier.
You blinked.
He raised a hand, almost like an apology. “Sorry, am I late?”
“No,” you said, voice even. “Just in time.”
He walked to an empty mat in the middle of the room, offered a polite nod to the woman beside him, and dropped into a seated position.
His form was… not bad.
You noticed the way he carried himself. Not stiff like a beginner, but not fluid either. Like he was used to his body obeying commands, but not like this. His limbs were longer than most, his frame broader, but he moved with control. Athletic.
You inhaled.
“Let’s begin.”
The flow started slow. You watched him carefully through the mirrors—his focus, the way his brow furrowed during transitions, the slight tremble in his legs. You walked around the room giving corrections, adjusting shoulders, lengthening hips, and when you got to him, he looked up at you like you were sunlight in human form.
“Lift through your ribs,” you murmured, fingers just grazing the side of his torso.
He nodded, exhaling through parted lips.
You hated that your heart fluttered a little.
By the end of the class, half the room was drenched in effort. Your tank top stuck to your back. You guided them all down to their mats for savasana, your voice like silk.
“Let go of your thoughts. Let go of your tension. This moment belongs only to you.”
Eyes closed. Silence. Calm.
But you could feel his presence even then.
After class, people lingered for water and soft goodbyes. Jude took his time rolling up his mat, moving slowly, like he didn’t want to leave.
You were wiping down a block when he approached.
“Hey,” he said. Up close, he smelled like fresh cotton and something you couldn’t name. Expensive. Masculine.
“Hi,” you replied, glancing up.
“You’re good,” he said, nodding to the studio. “Like, really good.”
You smiled, but kept it polite. “Thanks. You move well—for a beginner.”
He grinned. “I’m not a total beginner.”
“Football?” you asked, arching a brow.
He chuckled. “Um yea guilty.”
You narrowed your eyes. “That accent. You're—British?”
“Birmingham, yeah.”
“Ah,” you nodded, teasing. “That explains the tight hamstrings.”
He laughed, full and boyish. “Alright, no need to call me out like that.”
You handed him a towel. “I call it like I see it.”
He took it from you, brushing your fingers slightly. “Well, thanks. For the class.”
You nodded. “You’re welcome.”
But he didn’t leave right away.
He stood there, tapping the towel against his palm. “Listen… I’m kinda new here. Moved a few months ago. Still figuring it all out.”
You tilted your head. “Madrid’s not too hard to love.”
“No, it’s not,” he said, eyes on you now. “Especially the people.”
You didn’t look away. “Flirting with your yoga teacher is bold.”
He smiled. “So it’s working?”
You paused. “I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t say no either.”
Your silence was its own answer.
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Jude started showing up every week.
Sometimes twice.
He never asked for a selfie, never mentioned football, and didn’t tell you his last name until your third conversation at the café across the street when he finally said, “You don’t really know who I am, you know?”
You sipped your matcha. “You’re Jude. You do yoga and can’t touch your toes. That’s all I need to know.”
He laughed, shook his head, and leaned back like he hadn’t felt this relaxed in years.
It became your rhythm—his voice in your class, his teasing after, his smile as familiar as sunrise.
One night, after a particularly rainy Madrid evening, he offered to walk you home.
You were quiet at first. The kind of quiet that felt full, not awkward.
Then he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and looked at you.
“I like you,” he said.
You blinked. “I know.”
He chuckled. “No, I mean—I really like you.”
You felt your stomach flip.
So you stood on your toes, kissed him softly, and said, “I know that too.”
It wasn’t a whirlwind.
It was better.
Slow mornings in bed with sunlight between the sheets. Grocery runs where he insisted on buying too many strawberries. Whispered conversations on your balcony about life and football and fear. Your yoga mat always next to his now, at the studio and at home.
He watched you teach with stars in his eyes. You watched him stretch his hamstrings with exaggerated grunts just to make you laugh.
He kissed your forehead every night before bed like it was routine.
You weren’t just in love.
You were safe.
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regressionschool · 4 months ago
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PAMPERS PUBLIC SCHOOL REFORM: EDUCATION REIMAGINED OR REGRESSION GONE TOO FAR?
By Emily Dawson, Investigative Reporter
For years, education reform has been a topic of heated debate. Traditional schooling often leaves students overwhelmed by stress, struggling with expectations, and ill-prepared for real life. In response, school districts across the country have begun partnering with Pampers Corporation to introduce a radically new approach to learning—one that eliminates unnecessary pressure, fosters emotional well-being, and removes the burdens of growing up too quickly.
The Pampers Public School Reform Program has now fully replaced traditional education in multiple districts, converting high schools into structured learning environments tailored to a simpler, more guided lifestyle. Students are relieved of responsibilities that once weighed them down, such as complex coursework, college preparation, and even basic hygiene routines. In their place? A nurturing, preschool-style environment where comfort and security come first.
While many officials praise the program’s success, not everyone is celebrating.
"I’m Not a Toddler—Why Are They Treating Me Like One?"
Emma Reynolds, 18, had spent years working toward an honors diploma, with hopes of attending a prestigious university. But when her high school was converted to a Pampers Academy, she found herself pulled into a system she never agreed to.
"It’s not school—it’s a daycare," Emma hisses, gripping the edge of her desk, which is barely big enough to accommodate her.
Around her, the other students seem perfectly content in their new reality. The majority have already transitioned to full-time Pampers, no longer expected to even attempt bathroom breaks. Many sit in their seats with thickly padded bottoms, others waddle freely around the classroom, their sagging diapers peeking out from beneath colorful onesies. Some suckle on pacifiers while listening to their teacher read a picture book aloud, their attention spans seemingly far removed from any concern about essays, exams, or college applications.
Emma isn’t like them. She remembers what school used to be.
"They call me ‘sweetie’ and ‘princess’ and pat my head when I get answers right. They make me sit crisscross-applesauce on the rug during storytime. They don’t teach math, they teach shapes. We have scheduled nap times. And worst of all?" She shifts uncomfortably, her thick pull-ups rustling beneath her skirt. "They won’t even let us use the bathroom like normal people."
Under the Pampers system, students are placed in protective undergarments based on their "developmental needs." For most, that means ultra-absorbent Pampers diapers, ensuring accidents never disrupt classroom learning. Only a handful, like Emma, are still permitted pull-ups, though even that comes with restrictions.
"I told them I don’t need them. I told them I can hold it during class. But guess what?" She clenches her fists. "I couldn’t."
She shakes her head, looking away. "And when you have an accident, they make a big deal about it. They take you to the ‘quiet corner,’ change you, tell you it’s okay, and give you a sticker for ‘trying your best.’ It’s humiliating. But the worst part?" She swallows hard. "The more accidents you have, the more they ‘adjust’ your routine."
At first, Emma was only required to wear pull-ups during class. Now, she’s in them full-time. She doesn’t know what the next "adjustment" will be.
"What happens if they decide I don’t need pull-ups anymore?" she whispers. "What happens if they decide I need…more?"
A Mother’s Concern: “I Don’t Know How Much Longer She’ll Last”
Emma’s mother, Debbie Hall, initially believed the program was an opportunity for her daughter to learn patience and adapt to new challenges. Now, she isn’t so sure.
"She’s been fighting this since day one," Debbie admits, rubbing her temples. "But every time she resists, the school just… doubles down."
At first, Emma refused to use her Pampers-issued pull-ups, insisting she would simply wait until she got home. It didn’t last.
"She told me she’d hold it," Debbie sighs, shaking her head. "She didn’t."
When the school called, Debbie was asked to bring a fresh pull-up and a change of clothes—a moment she describes as one of the most surreal experiences of her life.
"I stood outside the classroom, holding a pack of training pants meant for toddlers, about to hand them to my eighteen-year-old daughter." She exhales sharply. "I don’t know how much longer she’ll last before she stops fighting it."
And that, she fears, is exactly what Pampers wants.
Success Stories: “Happier, Healthier Students”
Despite cases like Emma’s, school officials and many parents insist the program is working. According to Superintendent Laura Whitmore, dropout rates have plummeted, student anxiety is at an all-time low, and behavioral issues are almost nonexistent.
"When we take away the pressures of growing up too fast, we allow students to flourish in a safe, nurturing space," Whitmore explains. "Pampers helps us create a structured learning environment where students can focus on emotional well-being and positive reinforcement.
Studies show that students in the program are better rested, less anxious, and more cooperative. Many enthusiastically embrace their new routine, growing attached to naptime, play-based learning, and the security of their Pampers uniforms.
"Some students come in fighting," Whitmore admits. "But as they settle into the routine, they come to appreciate the comfort and care we provide. And the best part? They never have to worry about making ‘big kid’ mistakes again."
The Future of Education?
With more schools adopting the Pampers model, traditional high school education may soon become a thing of the past. For students like Emma, who still long for independence, the future remains uncertain. But for many others, a world without adult pressures, expectations, or even bathroom breaks is a dream come true.
And as the Pampers program continues to expand, one thing is clear:
For the next generation, growing up may no longer be necessary.
(Sponsored in part by Pampers Corporation. Because learning should be comfortable.)
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literaryvein-reblogs · 7 months ago
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A Guide to Descriptive Writing
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Descriptive writing makes reading a more visual experience.
Utilize descriptive writing, to show not tell your story to readers.
However, it is important to note that if passages of descriptive writing are too long or too complex, they will slow your story down.
Alternatively, the story's development and readability fall flat if you do not use a variety of types of words.
Take time to choose your words carefully, expand your vocabulary, and practice descriptive writing.
Below are some tips that may improve your descriptive writing.
Try Using Metaphors
Metaphors compare one thing to another.
Utilizing this technique is not saying the objects you’re comparing are the same, but that your audience can note shared traits between the two.
Example: Jordan is a living map.
Explanation: Of course, Jordan is not literally a living map. What the map and Jordan have in common is geographical information and the ability to help others navigate locations without getting lost. What the writer has done here is demonstrate to readers that Jordan has an excellent sense of direction.
Play with Similes
Similes also compare one object to another but discuss one thing as being like another.
You will often find words such as “like,” “so,” “than,” or “as” used in similes.
Example: Diego soars across the soccer field like a jet.
Explanation: Again, this is not a literal statement. The author shows us that Diego is a fast runner and creates a vivid image in the reader's mind that would not have been present if they had simply stated that Diego is fast.
Make a Statement with Hyperboles
Hyperboles are exaggerated statements.
They are used to make a point.
Example: Math class lasts a million hours.
Explanation: Your readers will know there is no way a class can realistically last a million hours, but they will understand the feeling of time dragging on when you’re doing something you do not enjoy.
Use Sensory Details
Adding sensory details is a great way to help your reader experience your story.
Depending on the character and story, sensory details may include sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste.
Be careful not to overload passages with sensory information.
Only use what is needed to communicate with the audience.
Example: Cold, wet glue dripped from the bottle onto her fingers; the tangy, chemical smell flooded her nose. She rubbed it between her thumb and long finger, relishing the transition from silky gliding fingers to tacky digits to peeling the cast of her fingerprint away from her skin with the satisfying crinkle of crisp paste.
Explanation: In this description of glue on skin, readers encounter details of touch and smell. Although this scene is not happening to readers at this moment, they can easily recall the smell of glue and the feeling of it between their fingers.
Choose Vivid Language
Choosing vivid language can form a clearer image in your reader’s mind.
For instance, you may select words that more accurately convey what you’re aiming to communicate, whether you are simply searching for a synonym to vary language or trying to locate a word with a more nuanced meaning.
Example: “The knight entered the kingdom on the back of a horse.” vs. “The knight stormed into the kingdom on the back of a mighty stallion.”
Explanation: Having a knight storm in on a stallion rather than enter on a horse is a much stronger, more heroic image. Additionally, stallion may be a better word choice than horse because it is specific. The word stallion tells the reader the horse is male and could be used for breeding, which, since this is a knight’s horse, could be relevant since it could be used to breed warhorses.
Incorporate Feelings
Crafting a visual experience for readers marks successful descriptive writing, but you also want your readers to experience your work emotionally.
For your story to reach its full potential, you need to incorporate feelings, whether those feelings are positive or negative.
Example: Desiree felt the weight of the empty space in bed pressing down and stealing her breath like a knee to the chest. She was cemented in place, limbs unfeeling, as she floated above the bed tethered to her body but no longer secure within.
Explanation: Here, the author shows the readers a woman dealing with the pain of grief and the hollowness that sometimes accompanies it. Most readers have experienced some level of loss in their lifetime and will understand and emotionally connect with Desiree.
Source ⚜ Descriptors ⚜ Common Metaphors ⚜ Mixed Metaphors Plot ⚜ Character ⚜ Worldbuilding ⚜ Imagery ⚜ Notes ⚜ Writing Sounds
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aliice-hellen · 2 days ago
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This post is one of the parts of a guide for beginners, and new helpols!
Right now I will talk about one of the most important yet difficult things to decide: how do you choose a God/Goddess to worship?
We will meet the Twelve Olympians in this post, but I need to make a little precision first!
The Gods we all know more are the famous “Twelve of Olympus” but among them there is a difference: Ouranic and Chthonic.
Ouranic (οὐράνιοι – “of the sky/heavens”): These are the sky-aligned, upper-world gods, like the Olympians.
They are associated with light, order, life, growth, justice, protection, and public worship.
Offerings were and are usually burned, given in the morning or daytime
Libations are poured upward or into a fire
Worship is facing upward or toward an altar
Praying hands are facing the sky
Altars are usually raised
Examples of Ouranic Gods: Zeus, Hera, Apollon, Athena, Hermes (in his Olympian role or else he could be also Chthonic), etc.
Chthonic (χθόνιοι – “of the earth/underworld”): These are the earth-aligned, underworld gods and spirits.
They are tied to death, fate, mystery, ancestors, spirits, silence, transformation.
Offerings were buried or poured into the ground
Libations go downward
Worship usually happens at night
Praying hands facing the ground
Altars are low, close to the ground or pits
Examples of Chthonic Gods: Hades, Persephone, Hekate (in her chthonic aspect), Thanatos, the Erinyes, spirits of the dead.
Some Gods are liminal: they move between both realms. Like for example Hermes or Dionysus.
Who are the Olympians?
The Twelve Olympians (or Dodekatheon) are the best-known deities in Hellenism. They’re the gods of Olympus (high, luminous) and were widely honored in public worship across the Greek world.
They include:
Zeus – “King of the gods”, sky and weather (thunder, lightning, rain), kingships and rule, law, order, justice, oaths, governance, hospitality.
Hera – “Queen of the gods”, marriage and sacred union, Queenship and regality, divine law and family order, protection of women, fertility within the bounds of lawful marriage.
Poseidon – Oceans and seas, arthquakes (called the “Earth-shaker”), horses and horse taming, storms at sea, harbor protection, sailors, seafarers, and islanders, earth and fertility (older cult aspect)
Demeter – Agriculture and cultivated land, grain and cereal crops, fertility of the earth, sacred law and the rhythms of life, protection of marriage and rural communities.
Athena – Wisdom and intellect, strategic warfare (as opposed to Ares' brute force), crafts and weaving, protection of cities, laws and justice, rational thought and fair judgment.
Apollon – The sun and light, prophecy and oracles (especially Delphi), healing and medicine, music, poetry, and the lyre, archery, plagues and purification, reason, order, and harmony, youth and male beauty, shepherds.
Artemis – The wilderness and untamed nature; The hunt and wild animals: virginity, chastity, and protection of women; childbirth and midwifery (as protector of mothers and infants); The moon (in later syncretism); Young maidens and transitions into womanhood; Protection of children and purification
Ares – War and battle (particularly chaotic and bloodthirsty war, unlike Athena’s strategic warfare); physical aggression, rage, bloodlust; courage, violence, and masculine strength; warriors and soldiers; destruction and conquest; rebellion, impulse, and raw desire and fatherhood.
Aphrodite – Love (romantic and erotic); beauty and aesthetics; fertility and procreation; sensual pleasure and desire; attraction, charm, and seduction; marriage and union; the generative forces of life; sea travel and sailors (in some cults)
Hephaistos – Fire; metalworking and metallurgy; blacksmithing and artisanship; sculpture, invention, and design, craft and mechanical ingenuity, technology, and forges; volcanic activity; laborers and working-class people;
Hermes – Travel and roads; boundaries and transitions; messengers and communication; commerce, merchants, markets; thieves, trickery, and wit; luck and fortune, language and writing; herds and shepherds; gymnasiums and athletes; soul-guidance (psychopomp — guide of souls to the Underworld); initiations and liminal states.
Dionysus – Wine and grape cultivation; fertility and nature’s renewal; theater and performance; ecstasy and divine madness; mysticism and altered states; death and rebirth; liberation from social norms; initiation rites and sacred frenzy (Maenadism, Bacchic rites)
Some older traditions include Hestia, goddess of the hearth, instead of Dionysus. In a myth she gives the throne to Dionysus, showing her kindness and peaceful demeanor. Many modern practitioners honor all thirteen.
“Which God do I choose?”
When you’re just stepping into Hellenism, one of the first questions that hits is:
“There are so many gods. who do I begin with?!”
The real answer is that there is not any rule! I need to say that the tradition of choosing a God to worship comes from the influence of Christianity. Ancient Greeks worshipped mostly every God and Goddess.
And personally as a “Reconstructionist” I prefer to do it as the Greeks.
But surely its difficult! And not even I sometimes can do it like I want! So you dont EVER need to push yourself through something you dont want or dont feel like doing.
So how do you choose? I would advice to start reading about every God, specially if you dont know much about Greek Gods and mythology in general. Like I said earlier, the Gods you can worship are not only the Olympians, they are many: Gods, Titans, Spirits etc.
Once you read about some Gods, choose the one who you feel a connection to or you are more interested to.
I want to specify that its normal if you dont feel much attraction at first, or you dont achieve how much you want to worship! Its completely normal if you feel overwhelmed or you cant do what you want to do!
I say to give it time, it doesn’t matter the quantity but the quality. Worship also once a week or more, if you feel like you cant do much! The Gods WONT be mad.
“How do I begin to worship?”
I’ll give you a simple example.
The Olympians are a great place to begin, especially if you’re building a home practice. Here’s a simple structure you can use to begin forming relationships:
Each day (or each time you worship):
Cleanse your hands (khernips)
Light a candle or incense
Say something simple like: “Great Olympians, I honor you with respect and kharis. May you watch over my home and life. May my offerings be accepted.”
Pour water or offer food, flowers, or olive oil
Speak freely to the god(s) you feel drawn to.
No pressure. No perfection needed. Just presence and sincerity.
Also you don’t need a dream or a voice to confirm Their presence. You don’t even need to “feel something” every time.
The gods are bigger than feelings, and their relationships are built in slow, sacred time.
I hope I explained all well! I’m always up to questions! 💛
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deerdoegone · 1 month ago
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SHERIFF ANNOUNCES END TO SEARCH FOR MISSING COLLEGE STUDENT, STERNLY REMINDS RESIDENTS TO AVOID FOREST WITHOUT GUIDE.
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welcome to WESTPORT, new hampshire. along the eastern united states coastline, the vast flora and fauna that surround it can often mock the town's own population of long-term residents and obnoxious college students. sometimes, it feels like westport transitions to poorly mimic a major city or small town, depending on the situation; tight-knit, but this isn't a "everybody knows everybody" circumstance. it easily attracts tourists for the woodsy comfort, beaches underneath the cliffs, and charming appearance. with the main export being lumber and fish, it's not surprising to see most employed residents making pretty pennies for their latest catches. if not that, most work in business and law. as the leaves turn warm hues and greyhound buses arrive with passengers buying out hotels in and around the town, a unique species finds its own way there.
it is october 2009, and halloween is right around the corner. intro to my 2000s / 10s vampire dream reality.
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somewhere along the rocky and eroded coastline, there lies the human embodiment of a deer in front of headlights: AALIYAH DOE. born on valentine's day, she is anxiously sweet and self-consciously forgiving. a sophomore attending the local ST. ANDREW'S UNIVERSITY, her focus is on directorial production and creative writing. pursuing the arts has been her goal in life since she was six. she knew from a young age who she wanted to be, and that carefully constructed identity involved escaping the foggy air of her hometown and becoming a hollywood director or screenplay writer, maybe even both if she was lucky. she calls sofia coppola her hero, loves catherine hardwick and wes anderson, and has an eye for the dreaminess of psychological horror. she is the epitome of the OBSESSED ARTIST trope, but is also a BABY DOLL.
her common traits are selfless. genuine. warm-hearted. kind. open-minded. shy.
covered in muted shades and feminine attire, she blends in with the dull backdrop and isn’t visually loud or colorful. one of her biggest pleasures comes from lying in bed all day and thinking of her crush on NATHANIEL "NATHAN" HARE, a quiet boy who sits next to her in algebra. they aren't friends, by the way. she's just a smitten girl who thinks asking for clarification on the answer to number five is flirting. it is not. someone tell her that. like right now. at the start of the school year, the professor had everyone introduce themselves to the person next to them and from that conversation, she knows that he is from a small town in canada and attending SAU on a student visa while working at a local shop downtown. he once offered to drive her home after classes due to the weather but she just stared wide eyed and couldn't accept it, blurting out that her mom was already picking her up. she walked home in the rain that day. NATHAN is portrayed by devon bostick.
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as an unnoticeable amount of BRUTAL ATTACKS deemed to be animal aggression travels along the coast and hits quiet little westport, aaliyah puts her former life of normalcy on the back burner in order to help nathan come to terms with his newfound vampiric turning and help him grapple with the grief of who he once was AKA i live in offbrand twin peaks/arcadia bay/mystic falls/devil's kettle/forks and the guy i had a crush on showed up to my house one night after a concert covered in blood because he survived a vampire attack at the cost of becoming one himself.
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aaliyah is the youngest daughter of JENNIFER DOE, a former editorial designer turned housewife who relocated to westport shortly after marrying SEAN MATTHEWS, a businessman in the tourism trade with his job primarily attending to upper-class tourists from western states and european cities. her older sisters are ELIANA and MARIAH, respectively twenty-six and twenty-two. only she and mariah still live with their parents under the roof of a neat two-story family traditional in upper-middle class neighborhood MOSSFIELD HILLS. she doesn't have many friends by choice and prefers a smaller circle, consistently seen with SO-HEE OH, AVA FRENCH, and NISA NABHANI, girls she's been best friends with since childhood and formed a group amongst the four.
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