#look at him yeet that fish

[predshockey]

It's Tolvy Time! | January 1, 2024

[frankencanon]

So... Anyone else headcanon Buggy as Vivi's long lost uncle?

No? Just me? Okay... 🥹

Disclaimer: Do I actually believe this is canon? No. But do I want it to be? Yes.

My reasoning for this is fairly simple:

Blue hair.

-> Click on the "Keep reading" below for a bunch more nonsense on how I think this could actually work...

---

I did my math, and King Cobra is about eleven (11) years older than Buggy — which is a pretty big age gap but we're not focusing on him — we're focusing on his wife, Titi, who Vivi is apparently the spitting image of.

Queen Titi is the one responsible for Vivi's blue hair, and thus she is the one who I'm headcanoning Buggy to be related to.

And, as it is entirely common for couples to have age gaps of a few years or so... Titi can help to close that afformentioned age gap.

Whereas King Cobra might be eleven years older than Buggy, it's not unreasonable to assume that Titi could've been five or so years younger — shortening the siblings' age gap to a measly five or six years — which is not nearly as unreasonable!

Hell, we might as well throw Franky in there as well! He's got similarly blue hair and he's only three years younger than Buggy!

I last looked up these ages like a day or two ago so here's hoping I didn't remember any wrong!

Now, how could they be related if they all grew up in such different places?

Answer: Their parents are unknowns! For all three of them!

If I'm remembering right, Franky's parents were said to have been pirates who abandoned him.

Buggy's parents are a complete unknown since, unlike Shanks, Oda hasn't told us anything about how he wound up on the Rogers' ship.

And Titi? We don't know much about her at all.

So it is entirely possible that Franky wasn't the only kid his parents abandoned...

Not to mention that Alabasta and Water 7 are fairly close to one other.

And we have no idea where Buggy is originally from, but "somewhere in the Grand Line" is a pretty safe estimate.

So. One wound up in Alabasta, another in Water 7, and the third got picked up by Gol D. Roger himself.

Water 7 has a lot of incoming and outgoing ships, right? So it's not that hard to believe that they all could've been abandoned there originally, but two wound up on outgoing ships...

Titi, the oldest, snuck aboard a ship bound to Alabasta as a stowaway.

Buggy, the middle child, got kidnapped by Roger who pointed at him and said, "Is anybody gonna take this?" And then didn't wait for an answer.

And Franky, the youngest, never left in the first place.

---

Edit: OK, so I checked out Franky's backstory and here's how it apparently went:

Cutty Flam, originally born in the South Blue, was yeeted by his pirate parents at a young age — literally. Those jerks actually threw him off their ship and into the water — for some godforsaken reason.

He was then rescued by Tom the Fish-Man, legendary shipwright.

At some point Tom saw Cutty assemble a cannon out of scrap metal, and after that he decided to take him on as an apprentice.

Iceberg, Tom's other apprentice, decided to nickname him "Franky" because apparently "Cutty Flam" is too weird a name. Pot, meet kettle.

And that's all the relevant info.

---

Hmm... Now what can we do with this?

Well, if his parents were just yeeting kids off the ship as they go... That makes things a lot easier, actually.

How did they end up on different islands, all split up? Easy! Their shitty parents were literally just yeeting them off the ship whenever.

First one to get yeeted got picked up by a ship returning to Alabasta, who took mercy on the innocent child and brought them home. (Maybe it was the royal family returning from the Revelry? That could explain how Cobra and Titi first met...)

The second child to get yeeted was rescued by Roger and his crew, who conveniently were already on the hunt for a playmate for their first child — Crocus and Rayleigh were very insistent that it's extremely important for a child's development for them to have friends their own age growing up...

The third child got yeeted somewhere in the vicinity of Water 7, and was saved by Tom; His story after that follows canon.

---

Why were they yeeted in different locations and at different times, you ask? My answer: Consider their ages.

I don't know what kind of scumbag pirates yeet their own children to their supposed deaths, but perhaps it's the same kind who have children for nefarious reasons...

Perhaps they had some kind of use for a young child — fake hostage? bait? tax break?! — but once they reach a certain age... Suddenly, the kid's not so useful anymore.

And so they get dumped, just in time for their asshole parents to give birth to a new heir.

And rinse and repeat...

And so we got Titi, and Buggy, and Franky — all born a handful of years apart and dumped in different locations after they were no longer useful for their parents' schemes.

---

INFO:

-

Titi (Titi) - Age ??? - ティティ

Buggy (Bagii) - Age 37/39 - バギー

Cutty Flam (Kati Furamu) aka Franky (Furankii) - Age 34/36 - カティ・フラム aka フランキー

-

Age gap between Buggy (37/39) & Nefertari Cobra (48/50): 11 years

Age gap between Buggy (37/39) & Franky (34/36): 3 years

Age gap between: Franky (34/36) & Nefertari Cobra (48/50): 14 years

-

If we give Buggy & Titi the same age gap as Franky & Buggy then Titi would've been 40 pre- and 42 post-timeskip, a total of eight (8) years younger than Cobra. Not unrealistic at all!

Then again, she was their first child so it's entirely possibly they held off longer before giving in and having another child to replace her — not because they cared about her, but because they would've been reluctant to have to start all over again with raising another noisy, annoying baby, and would've preferred to keep running the scam with her, seeing as she was already trained and fairly self-sufficient.

So maybe she's a little older. A year or two perhaps? That would be one year to dilly-dally, and one year for the new kid to be born.

Let's make it a total of three extra years: two years they spent convinced they could get the scam to continue working even as she got older, and then the one year it took for them to have baby Buggy after they gave up hope.

So that makes Titi six years older than Buggy, nine years older than Franky, and five years younger than Cobra.

If she had been alive during canon events, she would've been 43 years old pre-timeskip and 46 years old post-timeskip.

---

Drabble:

As the first and oldest, Titi was well aware of her parents intentions to replace her.

And while as a child her first priority was to survive... As she got older and eventually had her own daughter, she might've found herself wondering about her possible siblings...

What happened to them?

How many were there?

Were they still alive?

Had they been dumped and abandoned as well?

Where were they now?

...And could she find them?

Late at night she would have trouble sleeping, frequently thinking of the other children like her that she never got the chance to meet...

Her husband, Nefertari Cobra, would notice and ask her what was troubling her, and she would confess her regrets...

And Cobra, sweet and kind man that he is, would promise to do his very best to find her siblings for her.

And later, when she passed, he never stopped looking.

Until, one day...

---

Oh, and before I forget:

You're probably thinking something along the lines of, "but there are a bunch more characters with blue hair! What about them?"

I hear you, and my response is this:

Not like this. Sure, Buggy and Vivi's hair aren't colored exactly the same — but compared to everyone else with blue hair? The only ones that get close are Franky (who I actually ended up slipping into this headcanon) and Kyōshirō, who...I don't even know what was going on with him honestly, but he definitely doesn't count.

(And even past the hair color, there's also the similar texture and shape that becomes extremely apparent when Buggy and Vivi have their hair styled the same way — as shown clearly in the images above...

I mean, they've got the same waves and everything! For god's sake, even their hairbands are nearly identical! Like, c'mon!

Coincidence? I think not!)

[cuubism]

part 2 of Hob Accidentally Yeets Dream from Baby Jail with the Ruby

“There are… many weapons on your person,” Dream observed with a frown. Just with a quick glance, he could count two knives, three throwing stars, what looked like a short sword, and a handgun.

“Oh, yes,” Hob agreed, tucking said gun into his belt. “This is far too high stakes to go in unprepared.”

Dream refrained from mentioning that he was already unprepared, having no idea of any of the context of this situation. On the other hand, maybe context didn’t matter. If someone got in their way, Hob would, evidently, cut them down. Perhaps it didn’t have to be more complicated than that.

The thought caused a funny feeling in his core. It had been a long time since Dream had felt anything other than anger or despair, so the new feeling was tricky to identify.

He thought it might be… tenderness.

Tenderness for Hob, who’d apparently decided he was going to ride with Dream wherever this expedition took them. And tenderness from Hob – his careful questions, the tea he pushed into Dream’s hands, the fierceness with which he said, I’m going with you.

The way he tucked the blanket around Dream’s shoulders.

It was a feeling Dream instinctively wanted to shy away from, but he’d been locked away for some time and his defenses against such things weren’t as strong as they once were.

“It is unlikely that you will have to fight someone,” he told Hob. “I will take care of them.”

“I believe you, but just in case.”

Dream looked out the car windshield at the Burgess mansion across the way. He had never seen the place from the outside, and it looked far more normal than one would expect the prison of an Endless to be. He found that, however much he was craving vengeance, he was not particularly looking forward to going back inside.

Hob made to reach across the center console, as if to straighten the lapel of Dream’s coat, but let his hand fall halfway. “Hey. You okay?”

Dream nodded. “Let us go.”

------

Every single light in the manor was on, and chaos rang out through the windows. Dream was sure everyone had awoken in an uproar the moment he’d disappeared from his glass prison.

“Guess they’ve noticed you’re gone,” said Hob, as they stood half-hidden in the shadows by the front door.

“The guards would have seen it,” said Dream absently. If only he still had his sand, he could have so easily blinked into the basement, accomplished his task, and disappeared again before anyone could react. It was possible he could manage it as he was, but testing the boundaries of his power while it was still bound by the circle might be… unwise.

“Guards?” repeated Hob, and swore colorfully. Dream couldn’t help a small smile in response. He hadn’t heard some of those curses for a few centuries.

“I guess our one saving grace is they can’t exactly call the police for help with their escaped eldritch being,” Hob continued.

Dream raised an eyebrow at him. “Eldritch being?”

“Hey, if you aren’t gonna tell me what you are I’m just gonna have to start making it up.”

This was said teasingly, but Dream thought about it. “I do believe… you may have earned that information.”

Hob looked at him, surprised. “Seriously? I wasn’t fishing for details, you know. I’ve long since come to respect that you have your reasons for your secrets.”

“Perhaps, but from what I have heard, there should not be so many secrets between—” Dream hesitated over the unfamiliar shape of the word— “friends.”

He would not have been surprised to receive some irritation in response to this long-belated admission, but instead Hob looked – delighted didn’t begin to cover it. He grinned so wide.

“As friends, then,” he said, and managed to tug a smile from Dream with the determination in the words, “shall we go set you free?”

Dream simply nodded in response, and went about his task of bringing the house’s occupants to sleep.

The summoning circle limited his power more than he'd anticipated. In his usual state, he could have put the entire house to sleep with a snap of his fingers. As it was, even with the ruby bolstering him, he wasn’t quite sure he managed it, or how long their sleep would last.

Hob watched him with a concern that rankled as the clamor inside the manor died down to a sudden silence. Dream yanked open the front door and stepped inside.

The grand foyer was like a tomb, but eerily flooded in bright lights. Everything was still on, lit, abuzz, but everything human had dropped to the floor. Or to couches, chairs, slumped against walls. Dream didn’t recognize anyone; they must have been house staff. No guards. No Alex Burgess, the boy – now man – who had once held such promise but let him down so utterly.

Hob sucked in a breath through his teeth, but otherwise didn’t make a sound. Dream, likewise, stayed silent; until his full power was restored, there was no telling how easy it might be to wake them.

Dream stared at one of the sleeping, unrecognized bodies for a long moment. More disconcerting than not knowing how long they had was the fact that these people’s identities still hadn’t come to him. Normally, Dream knew, instantly, who he was looking at, knew it from their dreams.

But he hadn’t touched the Dreaming in a long time. That knowledge was apart from him, right now. And half of these people… they were young enough to have been born after Dream was captured. He had never touched their dreams at all.

He tore his attention away. That would all be remedied shortly.

It was easy enough to pull the house’s layout from a sleeping mind. Dream quickly found the basement staircase, Hob at his heels, moving soundless as an ex-soldier could be expected to. They crept, two shadows, down into the basement, where Dream abruptly ran up against two feelings that were equally discomfiting.

The first was unease, a crawling sense that would have set his hair standing on end, if he were human. Dream didn’t even have to look at his glass prison to feel it; it crept up his arms and the back of his neck, prickled at his hair. It was like staring into a dark bedroom and finding two eyes staring back.

Rather like how a dreamer encountering one of his nightmares might feel, Dream thought.

The second was relief. Relief at having Hob at his side, at his back. Relief at having a human, a… friend, as if he wasn’t Endless, as if he wasn’t more powerful than all of this.

“Christ Almighty,” Hob hissed, gaze moving from the glass orb, to the circle and moat binding it, to the company they’d stumbled upon. “Jesus— what the fuck.”

Because here, of course, were the guards missing from upstairs, sleeping now on the cold stones. One had slipped into the moat; Dream didn’t bother pulling him out, and neither did Hob, though Dream saw his gaze glance over and catalogue it.

Here, too, were Paul and Alex Burgess, close to Dream’s prison, clearly in the middle of examining it for his means of escape when they’d been knocked unconscious.

“You were…” Hob whispered, and swore again.

Dream stepped towards the circle, weaving around fallen bodies. It felt like a sick game – make it across the room without waking anyone up, and you might be able to win your freedom.

“It was the only way to hold my physical form,” Dream murmured in response to Hob’s unasked question. He knelt beside the circle, a hair’s breadth from Alex’s prone body.

He stared down at the painted runes. Such a small thing, this, to cause so much torment. And so easily undone, had anyone considered it worth the effort.

Dream smeared his coat sleeve through the circle.

Hob sounded vicious as he repeated, “The only way to—”

Dream’s power exploded back into him before he could finish.

White light burst around them. Wind swirled in terrible gusts, blowing detritus around the basement; a howling rose in pitch until it became a scream. Power burned through Dream’s body, painful, ecstatic, euphoric.

Then it died, all at once. And Dream felt… normal again, for the first time in nearly forty years. He still needed to find his sand, his helm, but he could touch the dreams, the Dreaming. All the familiar voices swirled around him in a rising, chaotic chorus. He felt like himself.

Unfortunately, the interruption in Dream’s power meant that everybody else in the house felt like themselves, too.

Dream, momentarily lost in the swell of his returned senses, did not catch onto this immediately.

Hob, fortunately, did.

Two gunshots. Dream felt the disturbance in the air as they whizzed past before he heard them. In slow motion, he turned to watch a guard who’d been rushing for him go down, then spun back to face Hob. Hob’s gun was raised, brow set in determination, and as Dream watched, still frozen, he shot down another guard who’d leapt to his feet to rush at Dream. There wasn’t a single moment of hesitation in any of it.

Dream was not made for this world, the waking world. He rarely felt substantial here, rarely felt that he belonged, and his powers, though still considerable, were nowhere near as absolute as in the Dreaming. But this— this was reminding him that while he may not be made for this world, Hob very much was.

As he watched, Hob pulled one of his knives and threw it at a guard who’d gotten too close for his gun’s range; it landed true and dropped the man to the floor. For all that Dream was fairly certain it had been quite some time since Hob had been actively soldiering – and humans weren’t really using knives anymore, were they? At least not in the last war Dream had seen, though he hadn’t actually seen how that one had ended, now that he thought about it – he didn’t seem to have lost any of the skills. He fought with a vicious efficiency that was so transfixing Dream forgot he was standing right in the middle of a gunfight.

“Get down!” Hob yelled at him, and Dream came back to himself. Hob’s attention was already shifting to another potential threat – this time it was Alex, lurching to his feet at Dream’s side, a stolen gun clasped in his shaky hand. His eyes were lit with terror, matched only by that of Hob over his shoulder as he realized that he now had no clear line of fire, that he could so easily hit Dream instead, should he shoot.

But this boy… this boy, who Dream had once felt compassion for, who he had once hoped could deliver them both to something better. This boy – man – who had become a more fervent jailer than Dream’s original captor…

…he was no threat to Dream now.

Dream touched his forehead and the gun fell from Alex’s limp grasp. “No….” Alex whimpered, and Dream could see, now, his nightmares over the years, how he had dreamt in terror of Dream himself, in the form that Alex supposed might make up his true power; how he’d spent decades fearing horrible revenge, dreaming of it over and over. Ironic that, in the end, he had visited it upon himself by his inaction. Dream would have shown mercy, once. No longer.

“Don’t kill me,” Alex whispered, eyes growing hazy under Dream’s power.

“It is not in my prerogative to kill humans.” Dream’s voice was a breath expanding to fill all of the chamber, all of Alex’s head, a gust of icy wind. “And I need not. I can make you suffer far worse than that.”

Alex’s eyes rolled back in his head and he dropped to the floor, already deep in the claws of nightmares. Looking around, Dream found everybody else either dead, or unconscious – knocked asleep as an afterthought as he unleashed his powers on Alex.

Everybody except, of course, Hob, who was staring at him, slack-jawed. Dream met his gaze, which only seemed to aggravate whatever had him stunned.

“Your…” he murmured. “Your eyes.”

Ah. Dream blinked, and his eyes returned to their more human appearance.

Hob, too, shook himself back into focus. “We should get out of here; everybody upstairs will have heard the gunshots.”

“Asleep,” Dream told him. “I can be sure of it now.”

“Alright, then.” Hob took in a deep breath, let it out, and finally tucked his gun back into his waistband. He stepped over to one of the bodies, yanked his knife out, and stashed that away, too. Dream watched this, the bloody human mechanics of it, so far divorced from the ways he usually found himself fighting, when he had to.

Finished, Hob looked around at the scattered bodies. “Am I going to hell if this felt kind of good?”

“You are not going to hell regardless,” Dream said automatically. “I would not allow it.”

Hob squinted at him. “Thought you weren’t the devil?”

“I am not.”

“Cryptic,” Hob muttered. “Alright. Onwards, my friend. I am very ready to get out of this wretched basement, and I’m sure you are more so.”

This was undoubtedly true.

Hob shepherded him up the stairs, a hand hovering over his lower back. It was strange, this. To be shepherded as if he could possibly need protecting when he’d just put the entire house to sleep with a thought.

Still, Dream allowed it. And didn’t look back.

[penofpenguin]

helllllooo, sweetie <3

so, i had this idea in my head for a long time: octatrio boys suddenly turned into babys and f!reader who really loves children needs to take care of them!

sending love (◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*。

Hello to you to darling ^^

Thank you for the absolutely adorable request!! I didn't know whether you meant separately or not so I did the characters separately. Writing this was so fun and I hope you enjoy it! *recieves the love that was sent*

Content Warnings: A bit ooc, Jade

Reader's fish boyfriend turns into a baby and reader has fun taking care of him.

Azul x F!reader, Jade x F!reader, Floyd x F!reader

You knocked on the VIP room, hoping for the usual voice of a delicate voice saying "come in"

But instead all you heard was baby screeching.

You jolted in only to find a smol, round, adorable octopus crying on the floor. There was a cauldron nearby, which gave you a hint that Azul was making potions again.

You snapped back to your senses when you realised this was a baby sea creature not in the water.

Jumping into action, you emptied the cauldron and filled it up with water. Then you yeeted the baby octopus into the water, which was then swimming around rather happily.

When you put your hand in, little Azul wrapped a tentacle around it and looked at you with his shimmering crystal blue eyes.

"Having fun baby Azul?" You smiled as he nuzzled your hand.

"Momma," was all it took to make your heart skip a beat.

You wanted to put him in a fish tank and carry him everywhere with you.

Leech devils stopped by and Floyd made Azul cry. Jade on the other hand, offered to make Azul some food but you were hesitant as baby octopi cannot ingest mushrooms.

They did help you get him back to normal though by making a potion.

As much as you'd love the actual 17-year-old Azul, this Azul was too adorable to let go.

"Hello Azul." You rubbed his cheek with your thumb to which he splashed around happily.

You pick him up(it required alot of strength) and huggle him, to which his cold, wet cheek meets your warm one.

"I'm gonna miss you once you turn back." Azul stared innocently at your remark.

You fed him the potion and placed him on the ground. It also seemed that Jade had mixed some of the human potion into it too, for Azul's convenience.

Infront of you stood the mature Ashengrotto.

"What did you mean by you'll miss me once I turn back? I am clearly better like this!" He said, crossing his arms. Yep, he heard that last sentence.

You gave him a kiss on his nose, which made him flush.

"I love all versions of Azul Ashengrotto."

You knocked on the Leech Twins' door. A terrarium was on your hand, which you made for Jade.

Floyd opened it, looking annoyed. In his hand was a bowl(it was one of Jade's terrariums) which inside consisted of water and a baby eel playing around.

"Is...your brother there?" You asked.

"This is Jade. Can you keep 'em and return him once he's normal again??" Floyd said, shoving the bowl to your hands.

Before you could say anything, Floyd smiled, said thanks and shut the door in your face.

You were in fact, happy. You looked into the bowl and saw a small eel peeking out to see you.

Playing with him was very fun, as baby Jade was slightly mischievous, yet relaxed.

Baby eels are known to be very small, so you enjoy petting his head.

Take your eel with you everywhere. He won't admit it but he'll feel lonely. Show him some mushrooms that grew near you. Just make sure he doesn't remember the mushrooms when he goes back to normal(for your own safety)

Make sure to feed him enough. He keeps asking for food but make sure you feed a proper amount. Don't fall for his puppy eyes.

When he turns back, he actually gets embarrassed that you saw him like that, but maintains a relaxed facade.

"You're quite good with children." He says.

"I just love them so much."

"Perhaps you'd be good with our future one(s)." He says with his signature grin.

He leaves, making sure you're all flustered.

You don't even know how you got caught up in this situation.

There was a bowl of water, a baby eel in it, and water splashed everywhere on your bed when you came into your dorm room.

He'd turn back in 24 hours according to Jade and Azul, who told you to take care of baby Floyd as "responsibility of a lover".

Baby Floyd was a rollercoaster.

For your own safety, you didn't put your finger in.

Floyd kept jumping out of the water and moving everywhere. It was very exhausting going after him.

After sometime he'll get bored.

He'll watch you from the glass.

If anyone he doesn't like talks to you or if anyone troubles you, he will jump out and chomp them.

They had to go to the infirmary after that because of an angry eel.

Although if you're feeling sad of any sort, he'll try cheering you up. You'll definitely feel better afterwards.

He probably doesn't want to turn back.

When he does turn back to normal, he either runs and squeezes you, or yawns and sleeps.

"I wanna be a baby eel forever!"

"I'm glad you're not."

"Why nottt? I can be in your arms all day~"

"I would love that, but for now, I need to be in yours."

"Hmmm~ What a needy sea creature. Maybe I should rename you~"

After a long day of taking care of him, you end up asleep in his arms.

I hope you enjoyed this! I'm not really good at writing requests like this but I did my best!

Thank you for requesting and have a nice day!

-Madeline🐧

[antoinettedoodles]

Hey hey hey! I hope you're having a good day ^^

If I may, can I yeet my boy Finn into your ask box for the shipkid thing? He's poly with the octotrio

(Art on the right by @/clovenoko and art on the left by @/boopshoops)

This was fun to draw~ I enjoyed trying to add their elements together to make a kid! I may have kept lying when I said I was gonna finish it next week, whoops~ Got excited!

Ask box

Yuu/sona x Canon Child!

Meet Jasper!

OC x OctoTrio! (Azul Ashengrotto, Floyd and Jade Leech)

Personal Thoughts: Jasper acts the most similar to Azul and looks up to him the most, He naturally has Finn's hair color but color it to match Azul's! (But as you can see, it doesn't work much and Finn's hair color keeps shining through) Jade and Floyd's signature colors are always there, having a Leech kid without it feels like a fish without a fin! Since Jasper's palette looks the most similar to Floyd, Jade is the one that named him!

˳೫˚∗ Please give a heart and follow if you like my work!

Boosting my works and even following me can do alot for my account to reach more audiences as I plan on opening doodle commissions some time in the future!

[Request Details~]

[disappointingcabbage]

TMAGP 19 thoughts, spoilers under the cut

Celia why do you have so much paper, what in the hell are you making that many photocopies of?

ALCHEMY??????

She’s looking into alchemical explanations for universe hopping, I think (transference stuff)

Celia why are you looking at incomplete transference stuff??? What was missing when you universe hopped????

Sam found alchemy stuff when looking into the Magnus Institute, which is very much consistent with the ARG

“What’s got you looking into this?” “Just curious” *immediate glitch* yeah Celia we’re all aware that this research is way more than just curiosity bestie

Sam is doing what’s best for his personal safety but not what’s best for narrative flow (ditching the institute stuff). Good for him tbh.

old ass statement this time (1684), I’m surprised it’s Chester reading it instead of Augustus tbh

A regrettable anti Newtonian PROTOCOL????

yooooo this dude is on a first name basis with the gravity man himself sir Issac Newton

IS NEWTON THE PROTOCOL VERSE’S JONAH MAGNUS??? or perhaps Robert Smirke

Protocol against the entirety of London???? Destruction of knowledge?? DREAD EMISSION????

Did the people of this universe just straight up know about the fears in the 1600s? Was it then covered up???

Looks like this universe’s Newton got into alchemy and letter writer guy Does Not Like That

As an aspiring biologist I’m curious as to how exactly the “vegetative propagation of metals” would even work, seems like a funky little experiment

Awww Issac has a disabled dog!! Hell yeah animal rescue

“Yo what’s that big ass glowing flask?” “Oh that? Yeah it’s no big deal, just the philosopher’s stone in liquid form” bro WHAT

I sincerely hope that that means protocol verse Issac Newton is still alive and that we get to hear his voice in canon. I think that would be Neat.

bro has a tiny tree growing in a flask. That’s awesome. Why is letter guy upset at this? Is my brain refusing to see some horrific implications here? probably lol

I cannot get over the writer of this statement just casually calling Newton “Issac”, actually (might be because my dad is a physicist so Gravity Man is a fucking legend in my household)

ohhhh vegetative propagation of metals. The tree is made of mineral/metal

“I made a metal tree wanna eat its fruit?” “what???? No???” “Too late it’s already in my hand dude you’ve gotta try it”

NO DONT GIVE IT TO YOUR DOG

fullmetal alchemist war flashbacks

dog is now an alchemy plant/dog pokemon what the fuck

The dog now has human intelligence, apparently

Oh it’s reversible. Dog is dog again. That’s so mean to the dog why would you do that to him???? Dogs don’t deserve the burden of human comprehension they are too babey

“Are the computers listening to us?” Daaaaamn Sam caught on fast

Alice, bestie, ignoring the obvious supernatural elephant in the room won’t make it go away I fear

I’m scared Sam is just going to stop confiding in people at this point and then get into danger alone. That ain’t good.

Alice seems to be getting a stupid amount of JMJ errors. Maybe it’s because the Jon, Martin, and Jonah are all arguing over which cases to give her lmao

lmao Lena’s basically just telling Gwen to put her big girl pants on and deal. Iconic.

oooh Lena lore, she used to be the externals liaison.

COLIN MY BELOVED

bros holed up in his house, probably paranoid as shit

Definitely paranoid as shit, he knows the phones are listening and wants to yeet it in a fish tank

Colin’s got alchemy on the brain too, apparently

Poor Alice, she just wants her friends to be okay and they’re all spiraling.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

I've been reading Skelefamily fics, and I had to know how'd you do a similar idea!!!!

Alright so, whenever the Fallen Child of that universe is asked to stay with the Caretaker of the universe, they explicitly decline. They instead, in front of everyone, go up to Skeleton and their brother and ask to stay with them.

Does our dear Skeleton, and Brother accept the Fallen Childs request? How would life be with the Fallen Child if they accept? Why would they decline?

Do this with whatever AU fits, I know some don't really make it out on the surface or have a Caretaker that would ask, but generally I'd like to see the main 10 or so.

I'll go with Frisk/Chara/Aliza because it's funnier.

Undertale Sans - Uh... No? He's literally not ready to be a dad or whatever? He can see why Frisk is seeing him as some kind of father figure, but really, he never did it on purpose. Sans smiles at the kid gently, takes their hand, drags them back to Toriel, and disappears lol. He had already a very long day, give him a break jeez.

Undertale Papyrus - He immediately accepts, but... Uh... He has no idea how it works? To be a dad. Papyrus takes you on a father-child date and then abandons you at the end as he can't reciprocate your feelings. You're heartbroken, but that's fine, he knows the right person for you! He then proceeds to give you back to Toriel lol.

Underswap Sans and Papyrus - Both brothers look at each other in complete panic. They both start to whisper-scream silently and do wide gestures with their hands only them understand as they're arguing on the matter. Honey then tries to explain you the most gentle way he can that they currently don't have room but maybe later. Blue nods the whole time while pushing you back towards Asgore.

Underfell Sans & Papyrus - You want what now? Both brothers are really concerned. Red tried to kill you. Several times. Edge as well, even though he kinda spared you in the end (not his proudest moment as a captain, but you know). Why the hell would you want them as parents? They have no idea how to take care of themselves, what the hell would they do with a child? Edge straight tells you to ask the lesbians and then yeets you with blue magic towards Undyne and Alphys lol. Not his problem, have fun with the fish lady.

Horrortale Sans & Papyrus - Probably the only ones who would accept. You took them out of hell, and so you're a little bit a part of the family already. It's not like Toriel won't be your mother anyway because in case you didn't notice, Toriel is mothering everyone. If you don't have anywhere to go, they'll gladly accept you to follow them a little longer. They don't consider themselves fathers though.

Swapfell Sans & Papyrus - Surprisingly, Rus might say yes. He got attached to the kid and he was kinda the one who protected them through their journey. He wouldn't mind. And then you look at Nox LMAO. You gave him HELL through your journey, making it the worst day of his life as a general. He's stressed, he's tired, the Queen screamed at him all day and now you want him to adopt you? What's your problem? Why won't you let him be happy? Did someone hire you to ruin his life? Please, he's begging you, he just wants to be happy again. L E A V E. He's thankful you got them out of the Underground, but that doesn't make you friends.

Fellswap Gold Sans & Papyrus - Coffee wants to adopt you but more like adopting a puppy. He's holding you in his arms like a baby and he's doing his best to fore Wine to say yes with his best puppy eyes, even whining to convince him more. Wine eventually accepts, clearly not happy, at the condition Coffee feeds you and takes care of you. Coffee is so happy, though you're not sure if it was a good choice after all. You're not sure if you should feel offended or not at this point.

[paperhalfshell]

dancing waves.

Pairing: Rise!Leonardo x Reader Word Count: 1,155 words Warnings: None

“You told me,” you screech, “that nothing at a mystic beach would try to kill me!”

“No, I told you that nothing on this beach will kill you,” Leo says, arm windmilling to cut another portal open through the sand. “Not when NEON LEON is here!”

He laughs. You do not.

“LEO –”

The ground quakes.

“And in we go!”

With a grin way too gleeful for someone about to be slurped up by a giant worm with teeth, Leo tackles the two of you into the portal.

Everything is a blinding whirl of blue and tangled limbs and the next thing you know, you have a mouth full of cold sand and the plastron of one about-to-be-hunted-for-sport turtle digging into your back. The sand tingles strangely – magically – on your tongue, so you spit it out quickly and wriggle out from under Leo to scrape off the leftover bits with your fingernails. With any luck, you won’t turn into a sandcastle or something.

Another mystic beach. You pin a dangerous glare onto Leo.

His eyes nervously dart around before meeting yours, bright and confident. “Would you look at that!” he chirps. “A reverse beach. I gotta say, this one’s waaaay better than the others.”

With a stubborn huff, you cut your gaze away from him to appraise the beach. It’s tiny, secluded, two-thirds of it surrounded by cliffs. The sand is smooth and blue against your skin, tangles of seagrass sprouting up in clusters around you. Strange-looking fish drift about in the air. And a few yards away, rolling gently into the shore, are waves the color of tangerines.

The most striking detail, however, is the complete lack of man-slash-yokai-eating monsters.

Your fists slowly relax, though you keep your frown out of pride. “It’s fine … I guess.”

Leo snorts. He gets to his feet, then sticks out a hand to help you up. “Aw, c’mon,” he exclaims when you merely squint at him. “Am I seriously still on the chopping block?”

“Is this place really safe?” you grumble in lieu of an answer, causing his mouth to pinch into a pout. Still, you reluctantly accept his hand and heft yourself up.

“I dunno. Let’s walk around and find out.” He lifts his sword into the air and starts marching down the beach. “Don’t worry, we won’t stop until we find the best beach in the Hidden City that doesn’t result in serious injury and/or death!”

Keeping a firm grip on your hand (just in case something happens, you reason, so you don’t protest), he leads you along, scanning the sand and the water for potentially dangerous creatures. None of the ones you see pose any real threat, usually swimming or scuttling away once you draw near. After some thought, you and Leo also dip your toes into the orange water and find that the only thing strange about it is the color. It’s also warm, and you do your best to hide your delight.

“Is that a smile I see?”

Crap.

“No.”

“Oh-ho-ho, that was definitely a smile,” Leo preens, letting go of your hand to toss your bags and his sword to a spot further away from the water. “I, Leonardo, officially deem this beach turtle- and human-friendly. Which means …!”

With that, he sweeps you up onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and dashes towards the shore.

“Leo!” you shriek, but this time, delight underscores the name leaving your mouth. He skids to a stop once the water reaches above his waist, and your stomach swoops in that familiar way as he hoists you over his head. (Gosh, he’s strong.) “Don’t you d –”

He sucks in a deep breath and launches you into the air.

“YEET!”

For a split second, you’re flying, limbs flailing. Then the waves rush up to swallow you whole.

You resurface quickly enough, sputtering and laughing; Leo breaks into a grin as you leap up and try to dunk him underwater.

“You jerk!”

“What was that? ‘I forgive you’?” he yells, kicking and splashing back at you. “You accept my heartfelt apology and we’re best friends again? That’s great!”

“Your apology almost got me killed three times!”

“I’m sorrrry! But you’re still alive, right?” Leo chuckles, but there’s a note of guilt in his tone, and his smile fades. You blink. The horseplay ceases as he rubs the back of his head. “I swear the pamphlets didn’t say anything about shell traps or giant worms with teeth. I probably should’ve checked the socials before portaling us.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.” He looks down into the water, then glances up at you hopefully. “But this one is fun enough, right?”

“Fun enough to make up for everything, you mean?” you ask. He winces. “Fun enough to make up for the very important fundraiser that I worked on for three weeks and reminded you about for a whole week leading up to it, only for you to miss the whole thing because you ticked off a giant yokai in the Hidden City on purpose? Fun enough for me to forgive you?”

Leo swallows dryly, looking every bit as remorseful as he did last week. “Yeah …?” he says, voice small.

You stare at him. He shrinks beneath your gaze, and it’s impossible to tell whether the moisture on his forehead is sea or sweat.

Eventually, you break into a small smile and pat his shoulder. “It is.”

He slumps. “Oh, thank god.”

“But I’d also like pizza at Run of the Mill and a shot at your portal sword.” You glance enviously at the giant blade lying in the sand, gleaming underneath the sun.

Leo gives you a wary look. “Okay, you got a date for the pizza, but I dunno about letting you use my sword. Not to be a wet blanket, but you don’t exactly have the best track record with mystic weapons.”

“Just let me hold it while you make a portal, then.”

“That I can do. You got yourself a deal.” He winks.

Your face floods with heat. Panicked, you splash him in the face.

“Pfft – hey!”

“Race you to that weird-looking rock!” you shout, diving beneath the surface.

“I don’t think that’s a rock, but you’re so on!” you hear Leo shout back before he quickly follows suit. Phew.

For the rest of the afternoon, the two of you goof around on that little beach, racing and cliff jumping and sunbathing. And when the sun begins to dip beneath the horizon, Leo lets you portal to Run of the Mill, sort of, his hands covering yours the whole time, and he treats you to your favorite pizza with money he probably cajoled from Donnie. The anger and the guilt are put to the wayside, forgotten. It’s just how it is with you and Leo. You can never stay apart for too long.

(Truth be told, you probably forgave him the first time around, anyway.)

[prettygoododds]

Thank you @nausikaaa @facewithoutheart @hushed-chorus @artsyunderstudy & @shemakesmeforget for the tags.

I’m slowly working in the next chapter of Sugar and I’ve definitely decided the chapter I’m irked about but can’t seem to put my finger on how to fix, will be posted Friday. So while you wait for Chapter 12 here’s a look forward to chapter 13

“This is absurd! We are meant to look like professionals, not…. Whatever this is!”

I’m pacing the room, dumbfounded by the mere idea of wearing something so unprofessional while Simon is almost bursting with joy.

“The fans are going to go nuts!” he says, lifting his orange overalls out of the box and examining them with glee. His delight is almost enough to make me forget how much I hate them. Though the orange atrocities quickly get thrown on my sofa and forgotten when he sees what was lying under them. “A FISH! Do we all get fishes to yeet this game?!?! Have all my dreams come true?!”

“Here I was under the impression that I was your walking fantasy,” I say sarcastically but the way Simon smirks at me makes me wish I’d kept my mouth shut.

“My walking fantasy is you in this get up yeeting your fish down my throat.” He says and I can’t help but cringe, but he’s completely unaffected.

“Even the hat?” I ask.

“Especially the hat,” he says and he’s got me trapped between him and my lounge chair. I don’t know how he managed to sneak up on me when I was watching him the whole time, but I find myself pleasantly unnerved by his closeness.

For those that missed it, I was bursting with joy when I saw the Kraken team walk out in these gems for their Winter Classic game

Here’s hoping I can keep up the pace and have another chapter ready without making you wait (smiles nervously)

No pressure tags: @ic3-que3n @dohrnaira @thewholelemon @imagineacoolusername @ivelovedhimthroughworse @ionlydrinkhotwater @wellbelesbian @rimeswithpurple @aristocratic-otter @cutestkilla @blackberrysummerblog @supercutedinosaurs @nightimedreamersworld @valeffelees @iamamythologicalcreature @shrekgogurt @ileadacharmedlife @martsonmars @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[atomic-crusader]

Godzilla Minus One thoughts (SPOILERS)

TLDW: Godzilla Minus One is easily one of the all time best films in the franchise so far. While it isn't my personal favorite, it absolutely deserves the praise fans and critics seem to be giving it. Outside from some personal nitpicks, I'd say this entry is worthy of standing shoulder-to-shoulder with the best.

10/10

THOUGHTS AND SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!! GO SEE IT!!!!!!

Boy does this movies come in swinging! Koichi setting up the main conflict of feeling like he is a coward (he's not, as the movie goes on to point out) and then the whiplash of GODZILLASAURUS

I know its just an unmutated Godzilla but HOLY FUCK the similarities are there and I love the design.

Personal nitpick #1: was hoping the movies would go more in depth with the origin of its Godzilla but the movies isn't really about what Godzilla is but rather what he does and represents to the story. As a result they don't really say what he is other than he is known to Odo Island's folklore. I like that, it gives him a mysterious vibe.

I gasped because I thought he ate a guy be then he yeeted him

Poor Koichi Can't Catch a Break the Movie

Noriko was great. It's clear she isn't used to being looked after and it shows.

Speaking of which, ALL the characters are wonderful. The Reiwa era looks like it is being defined by stronger human characters and stories and I am all here for that!

I'm actually surprised that the trailers (or at least the 2 I watched) didn't show to much Godzilla action. Or at least the final battle.

Godzilla REALLY has it out for folks in this movie. That lack of a clear origin helps actually. His attacks are sudden and brutal. He is REALLY visibly pissed off too.

SPEAKING OF BRUTAL HOLY FUCK!!! For as much damage Godzilla does to everyone, he gets FUCKED UP! Half his face blasted off! It's cool the see his regeneration ability realized in CG

Personal Nitpick #2: I do wish they had made Godzilla a more obviously tragic character. He is just as much a victim of war as he is a symbol of it. Again though, that isn't what this movie is about, and the ending does at least suggest a sequel isn't completely out of the question, so maybe we can still see why Godzilla decided that All Humans Are Bad.

His atomic breath is wild man. Creating mushroom clouds and massive creators is some nightmare fuel shit.

NORIKO NOOOOOOOOO :(

(dont worry she lives)

The plan to kill Godzilla was interesting. Explosive decompression is not really the first thing I would have thought up for a sea monster that brings up deep sea fish but the speed at which it happens is important.

KOICHI NOOOOOO (its okay he ejected)

Personal Nitpick #3:... I don't really like how they defeated Godzilla. I thought it was overkill. Like, yeah I get that Koichi needs to have is moment and all but blowing his head up I thought was a little much. and then he crumbles away? I guess he was frozen? Cool visual though. I imagine it was hell to convince Toho to have Godzilla die that way.

I heard Yamazaki was a big GMK fan, and the last scene really makes it obvious. I wonder if he isn't available for a sequel, Yamazaki would request Kaneko to direct...

Hey Noriko is alive!!!! Hey what's that on her neck? Why does it look like Godzilla's dorsal plate? Oh God Please Let Koichi Be Happy He Has Been Through Too Much.

The overall message of the movie is so goddamn moving, Live. That isn't a request, that's an order, a demand. Live, you should be happy to be alive. You may not think it, but people love you. People can forgive you. You don't deserve to die. Live and fight for the next generation so they don't make our mistakes. It is tough but you and people around you can make it better. You. Will. Live.

[jttw-monkeybusiness]

After being put in oven: cool marks, edgy, scary, makes you think twice before interacting to him.

Before: vegeta looking motherfucker

Pfff I guess if you want to put it that way :'D Vegeta looking I'm not sure considering that he ate meat (fish and birds) sometimes. Wukong was before he got yeeted into the furnace still edgy, scary, and full of himself. He just goes a little makeup session ✨ Tho I guess personally the only thing that changed him is that he became less trusting to outsiders.

[heytheredeann]

Honestly the more I watch the boat scene the more you can't tell me that Napoleon did not deliberately throw himself off that boat. Nobody falls like that. Stunt people would not fall like that if they were told to make a fall look natural.

Napoleon knew Illya wasn't going to make it. Napoleon knew the chances were they'd both get caught. He looked at the odds and threw his ass off that boat and left Illya as the fall guy and honestly?

I respect it.

LOOOOOL it's possible

Honestly, that would kinda make the whole thing FUNNIER, because Napoleon not only stole a sandwich, sat himself down and happily "watched Illya work", as he was asked, because he's a TEAM PLAYER, but he yeeted himself off the boat ON PURPOSE and left Illya to deal with the whole mess LOOOOOL he's so petty

But ALSO, if he PLANNED it, it makes the fact that he went back even better for me

Like the whole POINT was to let Illya be the fall guy and yet he just HAD to turn back and fish him out of the water, he had a PLAN and then his conscience decided to make an unwelcome appearance LOOOOOL

It kinda reminds me of Napoleon grabbing the watch and keeping it to himself for as long as possible to use it as a trump card, only to eventually say "fuck it" and throw it at Illya as a peace offering

Anyway, Napoleon Solo IS a little shit so I can see this loooool

[dxrksong]

Blob ghosts and the Lazarus pits

May be subject to change as I just woke up.

So before I go into the study of Blob ghost's relation to the pits I should probably analyze the pits themselves.

Taking a note from various theories, I'm gonna go ahead and say the pits are natural portals to the GZ. But since these don't close I'm gonna do a step further and say these are the pores of the infinite realms!

Portals that open in the GZ but they close SLOWLY, making it seem like they don't close at all. And while they're closing, excess ectoplasm pools around it, making the pits we know today!

And of course, the longer the pits were exposed to negative emotions and various contaminants, the more dirty and corrupted it became.

The solution? Blob ghosts! The feeder fish of the ghost zone! There are dozens of them in every pit!

Now about the blob ghosts, is that they adore helping people and ghosts alike. Hungry ghosts? Free snack! Sick ghost? *vacuum noises*

So when this random human fell in, looking sickly? Free roomie!

And that's how Ra's al gul found 'immortality'. Although what the blob ghost really did was get rid of whatever was ailing him and replace anything that needed to be replaced.

The more Lazarus pit baths he has? The more parts get replaced by blob ghosts. He'd probably be 80% blob ghosts by the time he realizes this fact.

So what about Jason?

Well if my Intel is correct, TECHNICALLY it wasn't the pits that revived him at first. It was someone more or less punching someone with enough power to essentially revive Jason! (I think it was super boy??? I can't remember??)

But Jason was a zombie at that point. No core, no ghost. Until the dip into the pits where Johnny 13 got yeeted back into his old body.

And a body suddenly gaining a core? At least a year after death? The body would attempt to reject the core! And that's where the blob ghost comes in!

Making an ectoplasmic vein and nervous system, the blob ghost wraps around Jason's core and got comfortable! :)

[truths33k3r4]

CHAPTER 4 - 'Signs' of Life

" What are you doing? Get away from there."

Raphael's infamous frown adorned his face as he motioned for Mikey to leave the doorway.

" Oh come ON, DUDE! Aren't you curious at all about the OTHER MUTANT TURTLE?? Last I checked, we've never seen other mutants before. AND SHE'S ALSO A TURTLE!! Coincidence? I THINK NOT."

Mikey lifted his eyebrows in question. Raph sighed and rolled his eyes as he leaned onto the counter top and crossed his arms.

" Yeah, I s'pose I'm a little curious. But don't get too excited about her. Just cause she looks like us doesn't mean she'll immediately become our ally. We know nothin' about her."

Mikey sagged his arms in disappointment and groaned.

"Ok, Senior-Kill-Joy, so I should just assume she's our ENEMY?"

" No, Drama Queen, I'm sayin' we should stay on guard at all times. She could be dangerous."

"RAPH," Mikey flaunted his head, " YOU'RE dangerous. Does that make you my enemy? ANYONE could be a threat, but you shouldn't immediately assume they are! That right there is the fastest way to NEVER make any friends."

Raph grew a small smile on his face and loosened his arms a bit.

" It's also the best way to keep your head in the game and never let your guard down..."

In a blur, Raph pushed off the counter and wrapped his arms around Mikey's neck.

"... like that."

Mikey blinked in amazement and shock at the speed of Raph's attack.

" See, if you had been prepared and assumed I was a threat, then maybe, just maybe, you wouldn't have been caught so easily. Get my drift, little brother?"

Mikey begrudgingly nodded.

Then- in his retaliation- Mikey sloppily licked his tongue over Raph's arm.

Accordingly, Raph released his grip and squealed, wiping off the fresh river of spit pooled on his skin.

"GGYEEEIIII!!!! -MIKEY HAMATO, YOU'RE ABOUT TO FIND OUT JUST HOW DANGEROUS I CAN BE......."

. . .

Lotus' eyes groggily opened as she gave a long sigh. Apparently she fell asleep? She turned her head over to see- Donnie? Don? Was that his name? He was still sitting next to her, but the humming was replaced with.. snoring. His head hung limp over his torso and his arms lay sprawled out on the floor. His glasses were hanging on his face by a thread.

' Guess his calming technique worked a little too well. '

Lotus couldn't help but softly chuckle at the sight, which resulted in Don startling himself awake, flinging his head up and yeeting his glasses into the abyss of the pile of clothes on the floor behind him.

" -WHA??!? I'M UP!!! Whhaaaa happened?" Don sucked the tiny bit of slobber from his lip and wiped it with the back of his hand. " ARE YOU OK?"

Lotus was now adorned with a full smirk on her face. She minimally nodded and placed her thumb to her plastron with her fingers pointed up. ( American Sign Language for- " I'm Fine." )

Don's eyes grew and his mouth opened the slightest bit. Then a huge smile sprung onto his face. After fishing through the pile of laundry for his glasses and returning them to his face, a thought came to his mind.

" Wait! You use ASL? ( American Sign Language) Who taught you that? Wait- oh shoot- are you deaf? Or- hard of hearing? ... WAIT NO. You- uh- you understood me fine earlier... Orrrr did you read my lips?"

Lotus' smirk blossomed into a small smile.

" I.. can...hear you. " She spoke. " I was taught by.." Lotus' eyes loomed onto the scars on her wrists. " ...them." Lotus winced a little as she massaged the invisible restraints that were once there. "They... didn't know I could speak. So.." She lifted both her hands and signed the words, " Taught. Me. ASL."

Don's smile quickly dissolved into a frown. And, using his own amount of knowledge with ASL, he signed back,

" I'm sorry. You. Past. Go. Through."

Lotus' smile also vanished as she turned her gaze away from Don to the ceiling. She let out a small huff from her nose. Her eyes glimmered from moisture but no tears dared to fall.

Don placed his hand on the edge of the bed and gave Lotus a shy smile. He could sense the need for silence at this moment. Ever since he was a kid, it was harder for him to understand how emotions worked, and how to deal with them accordingly. But thankfully, as a turtle of science, he had the perfect test subject to observe for that particular study: the most emotion-filled creature on the planet, his little brother. As the years passed, he studied and watched how Mikey would react to different situations. And he learned through it all how to eventually be able to comfort and help his brothers through tough times.

And with all that data in his brain now, he sensed that this was a moment for quiet. Don still stayed by Lotus' side, but this time, no words came from his lips. Not even a hum.

As someone who was taught for two years how to do ASL, and knowing that Rise of the TMNT had their Donatello signing, I really wanted to incorporate it into my story with one of the characters signing. :) In my universe, Don learned Sign Language as a kid. ( along with all his brothers.) Splinter taught them all when they first arrived at his home in the sewers 12 years ago. Splinter didn't know if they were capable of speech, so he taught them a somewhat easy way to be able to communicate. :)

If you have any questions about my story or characters, I'd love to hear them! You can go ahead and send me an ask or message! :)

That's all! To God be the glory!

~ Melissa

Masterpost <- PRIOR CHAPTER NEXT CHAPTER ->

[birdy-bat-writes]

Can I Have This Dance?

Merry belated Chrysler and a very happy New Year to everyone! As a special little gift to @quillsareswords for our Christmas Fic Exchange. I was your secret Santa :D May I present to you, a jolly little holiday fluff! Hope you like it.

also, feel free to check out the other amazing writers posting for this fic exchange :) @glorified-red @quillsareswords @zombybird @citrinesparkles

Pairing: Damian Wayne (aged up) x Fem!Reader

Category: Fluff

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Nothing really, I suppose bad grammar might be one:,D

Please like, reblog and comment, I literally love hearing from you! :) And if I make a mistake (which I probably did because yo girl is sleep deprived yeet) please drop it in the comments and I'll fix it asap. Live y'all!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was the week after Christmas and The Wayne family were all scattered around the country for their post-holiday-pre-new year’s tasks. Bruce was out on a business trip, Dick, Jason, Duke, and Tim were on vacation with their significant others, Alfred was making use of his spa resort gift card, and Barbara, Cass and Stephanie took a girl’s trip in Star City. That left you and your boyfriend, Damian, alone in Gotham. Don’t get me wrong, you were more than happy to be there. In fact, the two of you volunteered to stay back and take some time to recover from your semester finals. You were looking forward to staying with the Waynes and getting to see your family friends again.

Everyone was expected back by the 29th. One small problem: this was Gotham city; the land of unforeseen setbacks and a blizzard had snowed in all the runways at the airport.

Each member of the family was panicking at a different airport and it might have even been a little funny to watch it go down if you didn’t need everyone back for the New Year’s Party in 2 days. If they couldn’t get here before the 31st, which they couldn’t, you and Damian were going to have to decorate alone.

After getting off the phone with everyone you broke it down. You could spend today finding a catering service that could make it in this weather and fishing through the storerooms for decorations. And in Wayne Manor, that was a task. The storeroom was easily the size of a basketball court. Bless Alfred and his color-coded shelves.

On the 31st morning, the last of the preparations were being sorted. The food was tucked away in the industrial freezers and navy-blue carpet was laid out at every entrance, adorned with gold confetti-filled balloons. As you and Damian sat alone on the ballroom floor, untangling the last sets of string lights, you fully realized just how exhausted you were. After your finals, your days were a blur of packing, traveling, and trying to stay awake through every Christmas celebration you agreed (and regretted agreeing) to going to. You never truly had moment to enjoy your time with the family or even the one person you really wanted to be with: Damian. He must have seen you getting into your thoughts and pulled you out with some song suggestions.

“Okay, then, what’s your favorite slow song?”, he asked.

“I don’t even think I have one.”, you replied.

“There’s no way.”

“Of course, there is!”

“You don’t even have one slow song you love? Like a song you thought you’d play at your wedding or dance to with your prom date.” You silently nodded.

“I guess I never thought about it, and I didn’t really dance with anyone like that at prom.”

“You’ve…never slow danced?”

“Nope.” Damian almost seemed like he wanted to say something but decided against it at the last second. “What?”

“Nothing. I’ll be right back.” While waiting on him, you hung the set of lights and looked around the room proudly. Twinkling stars strung with lights from pillar to pillar, reflecting light off the marble floors and satin tablecloths. Not bad. Not bad at all.

You began turning on your heel to go find your boyfriend when you stopped in place, heart melting at what you saw. Damian was kneeling in the doorway with a handful of roses, wearing cheeky grin. “Y/N L/N, would you do me the honor of accompanying me to tonight’s ball?”

“Damian, what are you doing?” There was no one around and no reason to be embarrassed, but you still felt your face heat up.

“At the moment, I’m hoping you’ll say yes so I can show you a magical evening, and slow dance with me.”

As shy as you felt, you couldn’t hold back a smile at what he said. Here was your boyfriend of 5 months, in a relationship well past the stage for formalities, down on one knee with flowers, asking you to a dance like a couple of high school sweethearts.

“Of course, I would love to.” You said softly. With that, you headed upstairs your get ready.

You chose a silky green gown that flared at the waist and paired it with a few simple pieces of golden jewelry. After styling your hair into some soft waves, you reached for your shoes and the tv remote. There was still time until guests would start arriving but if you flipped to some entertainment channel you were sure you would find some station covering the press and for the Wayne Gala. You were barely paying attention to the channels when you heard it.

“…the winds are only getting stronger, and roads are iced over, folks. Gotham city is now on snowstorm watch. We advise all citizens to stay home and stay warm.”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. That’s when the landline started to ring back-to-back. The guests were sending their apologies and regrets for not being able to attend. You obviously understood, but you felt your heart sink a little. You had put in so much work for it all to go down the drain. Just then, you heard a knock on the door.

“Come in.” Damian walked in looking just as disappointed as you. He must have heard the news too.

“I’m so sorry, Sweetie.”

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault. As far as I know, you can’t control the weather….or is that another secret you’re hiding from me?”, you joked.

“Yeah, I can control the weather and I choose to swing around the Gotham skies in -30 degrees at night. Great use of my secret superpower, don’t you think?” You two shared a laugh before getting Barbara’s call.

“Hey, you two. I’m so sorry, we just heard about the city shutting down.”, she said.

“Hey, Babs. It’s alright, are you still in the airport?”

“Well, we’re at an airport…”

“Who’s we?”, Damian asked. Barbara flipped the camera to face the whole Wayne family bundled up in scarves, huddled around their suitcases on the floor of some airport gate.

“All our flights got grounded in Metropolis. I’m sorry guy I don’t think we’re making it home tonight either.”

“Aww, well that’s okay. Just please stay warm and safe, okay?”

“You too. Bye.”

“Bye.” Damian turned to you with a look of sympathy.

“Well, I guess it all off then.” You whispered, kicking of the heels you barely finished putting on. “We should just go change into pj’s I guess.”

“We don’t have to.”

“Dami, no one else will be there. What’s the point of having a party alone?”

“We don’t need anyone else, the only person I really wanted to dance with will be there. That is, if she still agrees to accompany me tonight.” You looked at him, his eyes pleading with you. “We can play Axel F.”, he added, drawing a giggle from you. If nothing else, the two of you should get to enjoy the work you put into the place.

On the dance floor, Damian plugged his phone into the stereo system. He offered you his hand to Ed Sheeran’s Perfect.

The first few steps you took were slower than usual. He took you through an almost-waltz, twirling you around and sauntering across the room one step at a time. His hand never leaving yours. You wondered why you had never done this before. It was so much fun. Then again, maybe that had more to with your dancing partner than the dance itself.

You air-guitared and headbanged like rockstars, goofed around through a playlist on shuffle, and then box-stepped again to a Backstreet Boys song you would not stop making fun of him for.

“It’s a good song!”

“Whatever, babe, just remember you can never make fun of me for listening to Nickelback ever again.” Pulling in you in close enough to feel his breath on your skin, he said,

“The backstreet boys are infinitely better than Nickelback.”

“You wish.”

“I’m right and you know it.” That’s when the next song played, and it took you both pleasantly by surprise. Can I Have this Dance from High School Musical 3.

“I haven’t heard this song in ages.”

“Me neither. Wasn’t this one of your favorite movies?”

“Yeah, it was. I so wanted to be the main character in this. She was teaching Zac Efron how to waltz. That was probably the epitome of romance to me when I was younger.”

“Well, I’m no Zac Efron, but like the song says, can I have dance this dance?” taking his hand one more time, you took to the floor holding him even closer as if you didn’t want be away from him for even second. A little before the song came to close, you spotted the grandfather clock at the top of the staircase striking 11:59.

“Damian?”

“Yes, love?”

“Happy new year.” He turned towards the clock, seeing the seconds hand only a fourth of a rotation away from the new year. Smiling, he places his hand on your cheek.

“Happy, New year, Y/N.” and as the bell rang for midnight, he placed his lips on your and everything felt like heaven. Pulling him further into your embrace, you deepened the kiss. When you pulled away you said what he was thinking.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Not even a minute later, the doors to ballroom swung open and roughly 10 people scampered in, tracking snow. It was every member of the family and…Superman?

“It’s nice to finally see you, Happy New Year!” Duke exclaimed. When Damian wordlessly motioned to Superman in the corner, Dick answered,

“If anyone asks, we did not have superman fly us all to Gotham city in a broken-down school bus and there is not a school bus in our backyard. Don’t check.”

“Okay….” You wish you were surprised.

“Nice to have the family back together again.” Damian said squeezing your hand.

“Yeah, it really is.”

[hyperfixated-gvf]

Keeping Secrets

On the fifth day of Tropemas, hyperfixated-gvf gave to me:

A smutty Josh short about naughty Secret Santa shenanigans!

Christmas Song Pairing: “Secret Santa" by salem ilese

Trope: Secret Santa

~~~

Pairing: Josh Kiszka x Reader

Warnings: Language, smut, oral sex (f. receiving), masturbation

Words: 630

18+ / MINORS DNI

~~~

“I thought it was supposed to be Secret Santa,” you gasped, throwing your head back so that it could thunk against the wall as your face screwed up in pleasure.

Josh chuckled from his place on his knees, arms wrapped around your thighs as he ate you out with a fervor that rivaled the way he hit his notes onstage against a wall in the hallway of your apartment. He looked up at you with bright eyes and a wet mouth. “We could find a way to spin it if we really wanted to,” he said, even his breath making you twitch with the proximity. “No one else knows that I revealed myself to you three days early, so that’s a secret.”

You played along, humming when he went back to flicking your clit with the tip of his tongue, but groaned and felt your cunt clench around him when added a finger inside you as well. “They don’t know that you got down and got me off with your mouth for your final gift – that’s a secret," you offered.

Again, Josh smiled against you, and you thought that it might be in your best interest if you stopped talking so that he would stop interrupting himself. Each time he attached those perfect lips to you, you were wound up like a Christmas toy, only to be held back when he pulled away again to answer. “I’m glad that you have such faith in my skills,” he joked.

In a purposeful series, you rolled your eyes and then your hips, guiding him to bury his face into your core once more. “Well, it’s not like I agreed to move in with you for nothing,” you sighed, moaning softly as he motioned you to come to him with his fingers while upping the pressure of suction on your clit. “I get– ah…mmm– endless head whenever I want it.” Josh widened his lips and sighed in agreement, shifting on the floor as you suspected his hips twitched, looking for friction. “And that cock of yours, baby,” you gasped, unable to keep your hips from rutting into Josh’s ministrations as your peak approached, “I’ll get to ride it morning, noon, and night.”

While you had a healthy sex life, you were exaggerating for the sake of gratification; you would both appreciate having the other right there instead of having to drive across the city to see each other, mostly. And talk about saving a lot of time and gas money - that would be nice, too.

But yeah, it would be nice having the option of sex morning, noon, and night, at least.

You cried out as Josh brought you over the edge, pinpointing that little bundle of nerves with a rhythmic, powerful suction (he’d been taking lessons from your toy, you thought) and giving you something to clench around with his fingers. “Shit, Josh– oh god, baby, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes” you gasped. The spasms of your hips made you whimper as they jerked you right into Josh’s face. 

Slumped against the wall, you felt Josh fish his cock out of his pants, and he chuckled as he slowly pumped himself, forehead resting against your belly. “Besides, just because you know I drew your name, it doesn't mean you know what the final gift is.”

His words interrupted the soft scratch of your fingers against his scalp, massaging and tugging lightly as he was apparently too impatient to wait for you to recover and got himself off at your feet. You could roll with the punches, though. “There’s more?”

His tone got real smug, real fast. “Sure is. But I can’t tell you what, Y/N,” he said, as steady as he could when you finally pulled him up and took over the friction on his dick. “It is Secret Santa, after all.”

~~~

Tag list:

@fleetsonfire @theweightofstardust @theatrekidjosh @fictional-duchess @greta-van-yeet @prophetofthedune @toothgapjoshy @gretavanfleas @gretavanfleetposts @doodle417 @razorbladekiszka @sammysvanfeet @s-u-t @lallisonl @hayley1623 @jakekiszkasleftnutsack @toxbexannouncedx @sammyslappers @alexxavicry @thecoldwind @maedesculpaeusoubi @jordierama @sarakay-gvf