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#jamil confessions
nrc-confessions · 3 months
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ok but rank the hottest overblots
Thank you for your confession!
1. Vil
2. Azul (he looked cool 😔)
3. Riddle (didn’t find it ‘hot’, the outfit looked cool)
4. Jamil 🥰🥰🥰🤭🤭🤭😻😻😻😻🤤🥰🥰🥰🤭🤭🤭😻😻😻😻😍😍😍
5. Idia
6. Malleus
7. Leona 😨😨😨😨😨
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kierancaz · 8 months
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You know what I find really funny. That fact I have read multiple Harry Potter fics where the characters have letterman jackets and stuff but I have NEVER come across a fic about literally any of the Twst characters who all canonically have letterman jackets.
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night-raven-tattler · 2 months
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The struggle between keeping the Night Raven Tattler newspaper as unbiased as possible and turning it into the Jamil fanclub newsletter...
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hirokiyuu · 1 year
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actually a jamil/kalim lobocorp au would be fun mostly bc its either. kalim dies but the creature wearing his corpse continues to hang out w/jamil OR jamil dies protecting kalim and come sback wrong somehow. u kno how it is
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azuregold · 2 years
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Yaaaay~
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My first Birthday card! And he was much nicer than his Dorm card and came in my second multi. It feels great to be having good luck with my targets in this game for once. Please keep it up.
One of his voice lines is about how he can smell butter and spice and that someone must be baking cookies. I couldn’t help laughing, because I happened to have brownies in the oven at the time I heard it (no spice involved there, but still).
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myunghology · 7 months
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twisted wonderland 2nd years, except they're helplessly in love.
pairings ; riddle, ruggie, azul, jade, floyd, kalim, jamil, silver x gn! reader. (seperate).
tw ; none.. unless it's a bit too cheesy..?
a/n ; my first twst work.. im terrified!!
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☆ — RiDDLE ROSEHEARTS
nope. will not allow it. he has his priority- which is his grades. he won't allow himself to be distracted by you. (more below the cut!)
but you are gorgeous tho, he'll admit that.
oh, would you look at that.. he's been distracted.
other students, even students outside heartslabyul are getting a bit weirded out, like what do you mean he's stopping in his tracks just to watch you pass by.
doesn't even notice it himself that he's staring at you. it's about time he notices that he'd stopped walking is when floyd smacked his head..
well, to be fair, he's noticed himself that he gets nervous whenever he invites you to unbirthday parties, he feels like everything has to be perfect.
—which is why some heartslabyul students are kinda annoyed when you come. only because they have to do so much with riddle pressuring them every 10 minutes. they like you generally though!
plus riddle seems more relaxed when you're around. that's just a bonus though! (is it really)
cater has multiple pictures of riddle just staring at you— his gaze softening whenever his eyes land on you instinctively.
he offers to hold open the door for you whenever you run into each other outside the classrooms, he offers to help you whenever you ever get injured playing some sport, and he even let's you borrow his notes if you were absent in class for a good reason.
sure, maybe he might be a bit arrogant, and a bit of a cry baby, and definitely strict— but he has respect for everyone. especially you.
riddle rosehearts is truly, a gentleman in a world full of boys.
☆ — RUGGiE BUCCHi
him? in love? absolutely.
if ruggie was in love, it'll probably be obvious. he tries to hide it though,, but it's clear he isn't good at that.
he's pretty chill around you though, nothing too awkward.
let me tell you this, whenever you ask him for a request, he'll want something back. no, he isn't gonna ask for a kiss or a date. stop imagining that.
he wants you to pay him back by a favor, so that he can pull the "you owe me a favor, since i did ___ for you." card.
okay maybe then he'll ask you on a date. or he'll ask you to steal something from a student.
what can i say.. it's 50/50.. slowly leaning onto the date idea though.
ruggie isn't oblivious, or stupid either. he knows when he's in love. he's just too afraid to admit it. sometimes leona makes fun of him for being a "wimp" and to just confess.
also stares at you, but in class this time. bro isn't listening at all actually because he's too busy looking at you.
maybe i will admit that ruggie is a little shit but he's actually a sweetheart when he wants to be. it's a win/win situation if you like annoying guys but has a soft spot for you.
spoiler: he eventually sucks it tf up and soon confesses.
☆ — AZUL ASHENGROTTO
azul may be a tad bit conscious about what you think about him. screw that- he's definitely conscious about what you think about him. from not only about what happened during his overblot and from his insecurities.
he knows you aren't that type of person, but he can't help it.
it makes him feel a million times better when you reassure him though. even if it's making him a bit delusional.. but then again you might be saying that just because you pity him.
"or maybe they're just nice and they actually care have you ever thought of that" - floyd
you go to monstro lounge about once a week, and for sure, azul has sent jade and floyd to take care of you well, since of couse, most of the time he's busy.
floyd almost exposed azul's crush on you once when you two were chatting, thankfully jade was there to cover his mouth before he continued speaking.
but when he is actually there face to face actually talking to you, he sounds smug but in reality, he's a nervous wreck in the inside. you obviously know that though.
wait till you tell him that you find him cute..
he explodes
no i'm joking, he's just blushing really hard. like.. too much. again- it's kinda obvious that he likes you whenever you compliment him.
☆ — JADE LEECH
so, so respectful when talking to you. still a bit teasing though. he offers to help you even if you're carrying just one thing.
always glad to see you when you're visiting monstro lounge, floyd loves you just as much, but in a platonic way! he isn't going to steal jades version of his 'shirmpy'.
tried to make a drink thats named by you, azul didn't allow it, unfortunately. (for him). i'd be embarrassed tbh.
in your opinion jade is a bit weird.. but he's still super nice to you, no matter how weird this guy seems. he would never do anything that would make you uncomfortable.
similar to riddle- he opens doors for you, sometimes offers to cook for you, and sometimes treats you whenever you're at montro lounge. only if azul allows it though, which is pretty rare. like jade wtf dym "its on the house" no it's not shut up.
you sometimes wonder if his mushrooms are safe to eat or not.
it's probably best not to ask him though.
he may or may have not tried breaking into your dorm room because you weren't attending class and you weren't responding to his messages asking where you were. it was all on concern tho don't worry i swe-
genuinely doesn't have a problem with confessing, but he only confesses until he's confident that you like him back.
trigger warning for floyd though since he's probably gonna pop out anytime soon during the confession..
☆ — FLOYD LEECH
my condolences if he ever likes you.
just kidding, it'd be pretty fun if floyd started to like you. only if you really like his bone crushing hugs.
doesn't hide his crush on you at all, you gotta be super oblivious if you don't notice it if he didn't even confess to you yet the moment he finds out that he likes you.
you're definitely scared shitless whenever you see him. when you try to run away he chases you around the halls and he's so damn fast, it's nearly impossible to escape him.
plus- his mood swings too? who knows if he'll get excited when you run away from him or if he's gonna get pissed off.. but mostly he gets excited though.
has kabedoned you one, too many times. mostly to fluster you, but also to get your attention.
easily gets jealous- especially when someone else hugs you for a long time. no one can hug his shrimpy except him! he isn't possessive, that's just how floyd is.
also stares at you in class- but throws paper airplanes at you, with the writings inside saying "HI".
ends up getting in trouble because either he got caught, or riddle snitched. most likely the second one tho.
drags you to monstro lounge to help him clean up his OWN messes, but he (might) have intentionally done this to spend time with you..
☆ — KALiM AL-ASiM
probably one of the best people ever to have a crush on you if that even makes sense..
spoils you rotten, even more than when he spoils his friends which is obviously already huge. wanna buy something online but can't? he's already asking for the link so he can buy it for you!
you obviously feel bad whenever he does this, so you try to remind him that he doesn't have to do all of this stuff for you.
not only with gifts, he spoils you rotten with affection too. you feel bad for jamil as well, he seems annoyed, but as long as kalim's happy.
very very respectful and nice to you, and will stop anything you don't want him to do anytime, he sometimes flirts with you unintentionally too..
hugs you literally at literally any chance he gets, he's also pretty clingy, if you haven't noticed that yet.
shows you off to other scarabia students, it's pretty obvious that he has a crush on you too.
bro's lovesick
gets so upset when something happens to you because of him, worries that people will try to do some crazy shit to you as well because you have a good connection with him..
introduces you to his family like you're his wife or something.. and then when you ask him what are you guys he'll go:
"are we not engaged" "NO??"
he was fully convinced that you guys were dating already
he's a little bit delusional but that's ok..
☆ — JAMiL ViPER
like riddle, jamil does not have the time to fall in love with someone since he's already busting his ass off taking care of kalim.. and with his academics too. plus the overblot situation but we don't talk about that.
maybe you are a little bit scared of him as well, but little do you know this guy will literally adjust for you anytime. it's really hard to see though when he does.
VERY hard to see that he has a crush on you though. you'd confess and he'd be like,
"i gave you so much signs what do you mean i might not like you back"
you were starstruck when you heard him say that. what does he mean signs. does he mean when he glared at you in class..? you thought you did something wrong for a second.
like floyd, kalim once almost exposed jamil for liking you accidentally.. don't get me wrong, jamil didn't tell kalim anything, he just found out himself.
jamil definitely likes you trying his culture's food, especially if he cooked it himself! it's not obvious, but he lets a small smile creep up onto his lips.
studies with you too if you're ever having a hard time. studying? nah, more like tutoring.. he's kinda harsh at first but then softens up a bit when he sees that you're really struggling.
☆ — SiLVER
im sure we all know silver is a generally pretty reserved person. and that doesn't change even when he's crushing on you.
but you do notice him stealing glances from time to time whenever you walk past him, lilia definitely asks him about that.
he may be a tad bit more open with you than others? but it's purely because he trusts you.
you sometimes tie his hair to the hairstyle called "apple hair" when he's sleeping and he doesn't notice even when he wakes up, he only notices after looking at a mirror..
genuinely doesn't mind though. lilia thinks it's adorable (he also thinks you guys are perfect for each other)
and that's why lilias opinions are always important..
generally, you guys usually talk through chat because you two don't really have the time to talk to each other physically.
but still, he still thinks you're beautiful. even if he can't see you all the time. this dynamic is kinda like a hallway crush typebeat..??
lilia is your number 1 fan alongside malleus!! sebek still has mixed feelings but he likes you generally! he just isn't sure if he likes you for silver.. or if he's not sure if he likes silver for you.. does that make sense?
after awhile he joins malleus and lilia.
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©myunghology
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Malleus, Vil, Floyd, Jamil and Rook, please! Are waiting outside the building for (their crush) MC so they can walk together. They hear a BOOM and "AHHHHHHHHH" and suddenly they catch MC, who was sent flying out the 2nd story window by a misdirected spell blast. In thanks for catching her, she gives them a sincere and sweet kiss on the cheek? Thank you!!!!!!
Floyd Leech: 
You are incredibly thankful you caught Floyd on a good day, as splatting on the ground would be preferable to landing on an already irritated eel. He tilted his head as he stared at the window you flew out of, asking with a pout why you were having fun without him. Once his questioning is over (he wanted to recreate the experiment gone wrong with his VERY lucky lab partner next period), he asked what his prize was for catching you. You ignore the devious pointed grin to give him a kiss on his cheek, a real mistake as he squeezed you extra tight until he felt he was properly compensated in kisses.
Jamil Viper: 
Jamil thinks, at first, that he should’ve let you fall on your ass but his ‘don’t let the rich idiot die’ training kicked in automatically. He stared at you with a raised eyebrow, his disappointed mother look getting you to confess immediately to what had gone wrong. When you thank him he’s suddenly flustered, telling you not to bring him into your shenanigans unnecessarily as a real ‘thanks’. When you offered up a kiss on the cheek Jamil found himself thrown off balance again, doing his best to glare and cursing himself for only ever finding trouble.
Malleus Draconia: 
Malleus caught you with total ease, looking at you in his arms with an amused smirk on his face. He asked if you were alright, giving you a once over before carefully setting you back on the ground (you don’t think you’ve ever been that high up). Before you’re down though you find yourself wrapped around his neck, your lips pressed hastily against his cheek. Your boldness had always amused him and this was no different, Malleus asking if he could get another if he continued to hold you.
Rook Hunt: 
Rook thought he might’ve smelled trouble in the air then, lo-and-behold — a beautiful specimen was offered from the heavens above, falling directly into his strong arms within the blink of an eye. He is painfully curious on how you managed to get in a situation like that, having to compliment your ability to stay stunning even while wildly flying through the air in a panic. He insisted you invite him next time, even the sweet kiss on the cheek you give not enough as he refused to put you down until you agreed to bring him on your next adventure.
Vil Schoenheit: 
You can’t help but note that, despite his slim, sleek physique, Vil is actually quite strong. He doesn’t have any trouble holding you in his arms, sighing and asking what caused such a scene. He takes it in stride but you can see he wants to give a thorough lecture (and perhaps a much less elegant ass-kicking) to the person who almost caused you harm. Now, if you were the culprit behind your own almost demise you’d be on the receiving side of his withering glare, no kisses able to save you from the scolding he delivered.
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twstowo · 5 months
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They get a body pillow of you [Twst]
♡︎Mimimi...
♡︎ Includes: NRC, RSA and Rollo
♡︎Warning: I wish they were real
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⋆⋅☆Riddle: This man exploded—literally couldn’t bear to look at the pillow and had to hide it in his closet. Sometimes, he hosts tea parties with it, using it to practice conversations for when he wants to talk to you about something.
⋆⋅☆Trey: Tells you about it, doesn’t feel good knowing that someone is giving away those with you on it. (Slept with it once.)
⋆⋅☆Cater: Takes pictures with it and proudly posts them on Magicam. No shame.
⋆⋅☆Ace: Probably treats it like any regular head pillow, completely ignoring the fact that you are in it.
⋆⋅☆Deuce: Similar to Trey, he confessed about it but didn’t give it a second glance—he was too embarrassed.
⋆⋅☆Leona: Sleeps with it, but only within the inside of his room—can't risk being seen with it.
⋆⋅☆Ruggie: Sold it. He'd rather be with you after all.
⋆⋅☆Jack: Also told you about it.
⋆⋅☆Azul: Experiences the seven phases of grief over it, contemplating making more to sell. Eventually, he can't bring himself to do it and prefers being the only owner.
⋆⋅☆Jade: Takes it camping, pretending for once to have company on his mushroom hunts.
⋆⋅☆Floyd: Walks around Night Raven College with it—if anyone mentions the pillow, he will practically annihilate them. He got bored of it really fast.
⋆⋅☆Kalim: This man owns far too many pillows, he would love it so much and sleeps with it every night.
⋆⋅☆Jamil: Also overwhelmed like Riddle. He doesn’t know what to do with it. Considered telling you but prefers keeping it for himself. When he's incredibly stressed, he talks with it, imagining it’s you.
⋆⋅☆Vil: Fascinated by how uncannily similar it looks to you, he proceeds to apply makeup on it.
⋆⋅☆Rook: Holds onto it but would much rather have you around.
⋆⋅☆Epel: Sends it back—clearly not his cup of tea.
⋆⋅☆Idia: Not the first one he got of you. He sleeps with all of them in his bed.
⋆⋅☆Ortho: Hands it over to Idia without much thought.
⋆⋅☆Malleus: Ah yes, me, my boyfriend and his body pillow of me.
⋆⋅☆Lilia: Enjoys watching doramas with it, finding comfort in its presence.
⋆⋅☆Silver: Also confessed about it and apologized, feeling bad for looking at it.
⋆⋅☆Sebek: Passed away. Spends hours conversing with it about how amazing you are. Lilia had to take the pillow away as he’d stay up all night chatting with it.
⋆⋅☆Che’nya: Turns invisible while grabbing the pillow. Over time, people started suspecting that there were haunted pillows adorned with your image haunting the college grounds.
⋆⋅☆Neige: Confessed about it and felt it wouldn’t be right to keep it.
⋆⋅☆Rollo: Deemed it too sinful and decided to burn it.
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liliavanrougelover · 20 days
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You like his housewarden?
Summary: You ask for advice on asking out his housewarden
Characters: Vice-housewardens (platonic)
A/N: If you saw me post this right after the vice-housewarden one, no you didn't
Trey Clover:
He’s happy. You trust him with this information and want his help? He’s glad you trust him. He’s so willing to give you advice and it’s so helpful. He won’t tell you that Riddle likes you back and he won’t tell Riddle that you like him. “I can’t say for certain, but I believe Riddle would enjoy roses. A strawberry tart would also help-” (It’s just actual advice).
Ruggie Bucchi:
He’s ecstatic. Not that you like Leona, but that you asked for his help. Why? Well, he’ll help for a couple of thaumarks. He’ll even give you legitimate advice. Just hand over the thaumarks and his advice is all yours. It’s not that hard, is it? “Let's say 50 thaumarks. That’s too much? My knowledge is very useful so of course it’s a little expensive.”
Jade Leech:
He smiles. You picked the wrong eel for the job (Either of the tweels would be bad). He’s a little shit. He just tells you that Azul would like anything (which is true) and then walks away. Next thing you know Floyd’s running over asking you about your crush on Azul. Jade told him about it. “Azul would enjoy any type of confession. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go to class.”
Jamil Viper:
He sighs. He’s so done. He barely gives you advice before walking away. Kalim asked him yesterday for advice on confessing to you and then you ask him for advice too? As long as you’re not playing some long con to steal from or hurt Kalim, he doesn’t care too much. “A stuffed animal would probably work. I have work to get done, so I have to go.”
Rook Hunt:
He’s not surprised. He already knows you like Vil and he’s equipped for this situation. And of course you would go to Le Chasseur D’Amour for this task. No one’s more qualified. He’s giving you advice before you even finish asking. “Roi du Poison would accept most confessions from you. What you should be asking is what not to do. You see-”
Ortho Shroud:
He’s so happy. He’s smiling so big (or the robot equivalent). You like his brother? His brother likes you! His big brother won’t be sad and lonely his whole life. He has advice, but none that’s really helpful. He tried at least. “Oh, well my big brother likes cats, so you could bring a cat when you confess. And you might have to confess outside his door.”
Lilia Vanrouge:
He has a cheeky smile. You like Malleus and you're asking for his advice? Well, he did raise Malleus, so he can’t blame you. He’s so excited for you, but he won’t tell Malleus. But, he told two other people. After all, Silver and Sebek aren’t Malleus. “Oh, you made a good choice by asking me. I’m pretty much an expert on Malleus. So first off-”
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Note
Hello everything is fine? I just found your account and I'm already in love!!!
I loved your sleepy confession writing post, if it doesn't bother you and only if you want, could you do it for Kalim, Jamil and Ruggie? They are so cute!!! >w<
Oh, and sorry if the English is wrong, it's not my first language...
An even sleepier confession
Thank you for the request and the sweet words!! And don’t worry about your English, it’s great! Plus, it isn’t my first language either, so i get the struggle, haha! :)
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Crush!Reader sleepily telling him, they want to marry him / part one
Characters: Kalim, Jamil, Ruggie
Format: Headcanons
Warnings: None that i can think off
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Kalim 
-Chances are, you were at one of his party’s, stayed late, and are too tired to go back to ramshackle 
-so, Kalim being Kalim, annoys convinces Jamil to let you two have a sleepover. The absolute energy boost Kalim gets after getting permission already makes Jamil regret his decision..
-after a long night of story telling (with how many siblings Kalim has, he definitely always has tea to spill), pillow fights, and movie marathons, you finally decide to go to sleep, much to Jamils relief
-Just before you two fall asleep though, you unconsciously make one last comment “Life is always so fun with you, really makes me wanna marry you one day..”
-If you thought you’d get any sleep after a comment like that, you’re wrong! Because Kalim is now wide awake and practically yelling in excitement 
-He’d be asking you if you really meant it, before talking about how you’ll have to meet his family first, especially all his siblings! They’ll love you!! Why don’t you come with him over the next Holidays?! All while being all over you, kind of like an exited puppy are those ears and a tail??, meanwhile you’re just sitting there like ‘oh shit, I said that out loud?!’ 
-It’ll only get worse if you confirm that, yes, you do, in fact, want to be with him and maybe, hopefully, marry him one day 
-Jamil storms in, thinking you two were getting assassinated or something, only to see Kalim hugging you, practically shaking in excitement, talking about all the dates he’ll take you on (and about your wedding of course)
-you sheepishly look over at Jamil, who is staring daggers into you, the message clear ‘you couldn’t have waited until morning?’. If looks could kill, Jamil would have cut you into a three course meal just now :D 
-Jamil tells him to quiet down, so the rest of the dorm can rest
-Kalim continues to whisper-yell, till eventually you two fall asleep cuddling 
-the next day, half the school already knows about your now relationship, partially because the entirety of scarabia could hear him, and partially because Kalim can’t keep his mouth shut-
-He is so hung up on that marriage comment, that he might accidentally introduce you as his fiancée a few times!
Jamil
-you, being the kind soul that you are, probably decided to help him out with his chores around Scarabia 
-But unlike him, you aren’t used to so much work, No matter how much Crowley tries to overwork you so eventually you’re just straight up exhausted.
-Jamil brings you to one of the many couches, but he makes sure it’s one away from the business of the dorm, he wouldn’t want you to be disturbed while you sleep he cares to much about you for that
-He picks up the few dirty plates some other students left behind, as you get comfortable, which is a very easy task, considering all those silk blankets and soft pillows! You mumble something a mere second before falling asleep. “You’re so caring, Jamil… makes me want to marry you even more than i already to..”
-Jamil halts in his tracks, he almost drops the plates he was carrying! Partially because he’s flustered, but also because a part of him hoped you wouldn’t like him back and the crush would pass.. not that it ever would have
-He is lost in thought as he makes his way to the kitchen, he almost even runs into another student
-Jamil likes you, he really does, there’s no doubt there, but he’s worried more than anything. He doesn’t have time for love!
-not only would you distract him from keeping Kalim from accidentally getting himself killed, but his work would mean that he’d have little to no time to spend with you.. not to mention if you get married, you and your future children would be forced to work for the Asim family too- Unless..
-If he takes you’re last name, instead of him yours, neither of you would be a part of the Viper name any longer. Instead of him enslaving you into service, you could free him from his life of servitude.
-And you always find ways to hang out, despite how busy he is
-He continues to work, now with a smile on his face. 
-Maybe this could work out after all :)
Ruggie
-Another one who you were probably helping with work
-Usually he’d refuse help, he doesn’t want to be indebted to anyone, but hey, it’s an excuse to spend more time with you, so he’ll make an exception 
-Afterwards, your beat.. even after book 3 and knowing him for a while, you never could have guessed how much work just one certain Lion could make.
-He lays down next to you, either making a sarcastic or teasing comment as he does.
-As always, you laugh in response, but this time you follow it up with “You’re a great guy, you know that? I hope i get to marry you one day..”
-His usual smug smirk, is gone. Just like that. It’s replaced by absolute shock
-He turns to you, to question you about it, only to see you’re already in the land of dreams 
-Ruggie doesn’t know how to feel, He is shocked, flustered, and most of all, confused. Yes, he is happy that you like him back, it just confuses him.
-You’re in a school filled with rich guys and literal Royalty. So, by the seven, why would you like a guy like him? Especially since your first meeting was literally him stealing a sandwich from your son friend! 
-But it makes him smile, in a school filled with rich people, someone as amazing as you, still chooses him, so he must be really great, right?
-Now he’s even more determined to get a good job, so that he can give you and your possible children a good life!
-He just hopes his Grandma and the kids will like you.. nah, he’s sure they will, you’re you! 
-He won’t immediately make his move to ask you out, but he’s definitely working on it! He would be a bit more hesitant about asking you out (Even after you basically asked to marry him) if you’re a girl, as in nature male hyenas are naturally more submissive towards the female they’re trying to court 
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This was so much fun to write, thank you so much for the request!!
Feedback is welcomed, just please be nice!! Hope you all have a nice day <3
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pomefioredove · 1 month
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Hi !! I love your writing! I think you've nailed the twst characters personalities really nicely <33
So if possible, I'd like to have some hcs Sebek, Ruggie, Jack, Jamil and Deuce would realize that they have a crush on the reader (in which the reader is basically their closest friend atp) and how'd they'd react to it. Would they be the type to shove it back down or get it over with? Something else entirely, maybe??
Hope this isn't too much. Thank you in advance! Take all the time you need!
hii first off thank you so much!! <3 and ofc ofc I LOVE pining (and friends to lovers?!)
pomefiore part
summary: how they would have a crush on you type of post: headcanons characters: deuce, jack, ruggie, jamil, sebek additional info: romantic, reader isn't specified to be yuu except in sebek's part because I found it funny, reader is gender neutral, deuce is a cutie patootie
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𝐃𝐞𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐝𝐞
oh, he is in utter turmoil about this
on one hand: he really, really likes you
you're such a wonderful person
the kind of partner he'd be proud to introduce to his mom
on the other hand...
he really, really doesn't want to mess this up
you already have such a great thing going on as friends!
if he ruined that, he would literally never forgive himself
and Ace would make fun of him for it until the very end of time itself
so, of course he just sits on these feelings. maybe if he focuses on something else, they'll go away?
spoiler alert: they do not
they definitely do not
if anything, trying to ignore them just makes it worse for him; suddenly he's becoming an entirely different person around you
it's like a switch is flipped the second you're in the room
he becomes clumsy, easily flustered, can barely string a sentence together
Ace gives him hell about it, of course
and when there's no hope of hiding it any longer, he just confesses
(not that it wasn't obvious already... but for his sake, you'll have to pretend like it's shocking news)
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𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐇𝐨𝐰𝐥
he's actually... pretty upfront about it?
once he's got his feelings on the matter sorted, anyway
...which takes him a few weeks
when he first recognizes his crush on you, he pours himself into his training
not as a distraction, really; he just finds it easier to think when he's working out
he really does want to think this one through
much like Deuce, Jack understands that he'd put the friendship at risk if he were to confess
unlike Deuce, however, he's somewhat aware that ignoring and hiding is a coward's way out, and will only push you away
so, once he's very sure about his feelings, he confesses
it's not exactly like a confession, though
more of a... lecture?
just informs you that he's developed feelings, doesn't want them to affect the friendship, and leaves the decision up to you
won't freak if you don't reciprocate, but... he might be a little bummed out
okay... more than a little
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𝐑𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐜𝐜𝐡𝐢
first thought: he doesn't have time for this
Ruggie has a job, school, and a whole neighborhood to feed back home
now a partner? no, that's completely out of the question
besides, it's not like you'd ever reciprocate. who'd wanna spend every date eating dandelion salad?
no one, that's who
of course he doesn't bother asking, but he assumes that goes without saying
but he's busy enough to put those feelings on the back burner and deal with them some other day
...if only he wasn't so distracted by thoughts of you, that plan might have worked!
by his third slip-up, Leona's had enough and demands he's gotta sort out whatever's bothering him if he ever wants to show his face there again
(he might've been in a bad mood)
but, unfortunately, Ruggie knows he's right
it's better to be rejected now than to spend the rest of his school days mulling over it
so, he just spills the beans, as plain and simple as possible
tries to walk away as soon as he's done so he doesn't have to see the look on your face
you can imagine his surprise when you pull him back
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𝐉𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥 𝐕𝐢𝐩𝐞𝐫
actually has a pretty similar reaction to Ruggie
Jamil can't possibly fathom having a partner in a world where he doesn't even have his own freedom
in a sense, he just doesn't want to drag you into his life
in another, more important sense, he would be devastated if you rejected him
so he just... ignores it
of course, Jamil knows that pretending the feelings aren't there won't do much, but he doesn't really have a lot of options
he's not one to talk through his feelings, after all
not that anyone asks...
and his ability to interact with you as if nothing is different is astonishing
even if it feels like he's melting inside
though, you may catch him smiling more at you these days
he just can't help himself
when he's got his other stuff sorted, you'll be next on the agenda
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𝐒𝐞𝐛𝐞𝐤 𝐙𝐢𝐠𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐭
you claim to have no magic, and yet you bewitch him into caring about you just as much as his liege?!
well... maybe not as much...
but close! very close!
even admitting that to himself feels like high treason
nonetheless, you have to be something very special to distract him from what he calls his "true purpose in life"
he sees you and feels... ill?
he's light-headed, he's dizzy, his stomach feels funny...
and he's been thinking about you more so than usual
yes, you're friends... he'll even admit he's grown quite fond of you in comparison to the other people you call "friends"
but this is... unusual
surely, you've placed some kind of curse on him!
Silver is the first to hear about it
poor boy is too tired to deal, and so he passes on the problem to Lilia
who just chuckles and makes a lot of odd references and metaphors that no one of this century would understand
no, Sebek has to come to the conclusion that he likes you all on his own
(like-likes you)
and after some pestering from Lilia, he admits that perhaps you and he could protect Malleus... together!
(he's going to have to work on the wording of that confession)
573 notes · View notes
nrc-confessions · 3 months
Note
Weed mod please drop your people I would love to kiss list
I also have one but I’m more curious who’s on yours
-🕷️
😢😢 sighs okay FINEEE I GUESS
1. Guy in my animal linguistics class who said he’d love to learn manatee language to talk to me underwater
2. Guy in my fitness class who helped me with broom riding.
3.malleus lowkey
4. Trey clover
5. Person who I ran into while carrying a bunch of books and they were so nice and helped me pick it up and they complimented my book choices.
6. Random model on a magazine I read once
7. This one inventor I learned about in class once
8. Guy in my language studies class that I realized a day later he was flirting with me
9.Jamil….
10. Vil schoenheit (just bc I think his lips are probably really nice and soft)
11. Ortho but in a platonic way because he’s very sweet I’d give him a kiss on the forehead. Idk he’s like a brother Ive never had 😭 he gave me a flower sticker once
12. Micah
47 notes · View notes
merakiui · 4 months
Text
maybe, i'm afraid.
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azul ashengrotto x (female) reader cw: slight angst, nsfw, azul bottles his feelings and is insecure note - happy birthday to my favorite tako in the whole world. <3 may you have wonderful days forever!! // loosely inspired by lovelytheband's "maybe, i'm afraid."
i. spring - dancing in your party dress, you were singing me some frank sinatra as you wept. pull me close enough. it seems like we lost touch, so hold me as the record skips.
“Can you believe we’re gonna be fourth years?!” Kalim exclaims with wide, sparkling eyes. They look like twin garnets set into his face—polished jewels having caught the aquatic illumination from Mostro Lounge’s aquarium. “Time really does fly, huh!”
“Feels like yesterday,” Ruggie agrees around a mouthful of food. His plate is stacked as high as it can possibly get, piled with contrasting flavors. “Pretty crazy to think we’re all gonna be heading off in different directions soon.”
Jade nods. “Our school lives are as fun as they are fleeting.”
An odd quiet falls over the three of them, which is soon broken when Floyd drapes himself over the booth. He leans down to swipe a sliver from Jade’s plate. “Whatcha talkin’ about?”
“Just reminiscing.”
“Ah. S’bout that time, ain’t it? Gettin’ sentimental in the spring.”
“Makes sense. The semester’s ending and people are starting up their internships or going home. Really makes you think…”
Ruggie gazes at the group huddled near the bar. Riddle, Jamil, and a half-awake Silver chat alongside you and Azul. You seem to be in the middle of a riveting story, for your arms gesticulate wildly. Azul looks on with what Ruggie thinks is the most mushy-gushy, ooey-gooey smile he’s ever seen.
“We’re gonna come back in the winter, aren’t we?” Kalim asks, tilting his head.
“Indeed. For the cultural festival.”
“Yeah, that’s right! It’ll be fun to see you guys after so much time apart. Oh, we should all keep in touch! That way it’ll feel like no time has passed at all.”
“Perhaps not for us.” Jade follows Ruggie’s line of sight, landing on one person in particular. “For others, the gap is cavernous.”
“What do you mean, Jade?”
Floyd catches on then. “S’not our fault he’s not sayin’ anything.”
Ruggie shrugs. “It doesn’t concern me.” He pops up from his spot in the booth, grinning. “It’s been great and all, but I’ve gotta get my fill. Wouldn’t be right for a guy to skimp out when it’s Azul hosting.”
Giggling, Floyd waves him off. “You do that, Sharksucker.”
Kalim turns to the twins, brows raised. “You’re talking about Azul?”
“He’s been swept up in Shrimpy ever since. It’s been—how long now?—about two years or something.”
“Oh.” Kalim blinks back at him, slow on the uptake. And then, seconds later, it hits him. “Ohhh! He likes (Name)!”
“There ya go.”
“I’m afraid he’s yet to confess,” Jade adds around a bite of cake. “You should see the plans he’s drafted. Dozens of them, in fact. Each one is… Oh, perhaps I’ve said too much already.”
“I don’t get it. If he likes (Name) so much, why wouldn’t he just confess? Why make plans?”
“Wow, Sea Otter, you don’t play when it comes to feelings, do ya?”
“If it was me, I’d want everyone to know how much I care about someone.” To demonstrate this point, he cups his hands around his mouth and shouts, “You’re the best, (Name)!”
You glance past a now wide-awake Silver at the twins and Kalim. Mirroring his actions, you reply in a giggly voice, “Thanks! You’re great, too, Kalim!”
Beaming, he says, “See? It’s not so difficult. If Azul needs any help, I’d be happy to—”
Floyd throws his head back and cackles like a madman. “Not so difficult for you!”
Jade masks his amusement behind a gloved fist. “My, my. I think I’ve just witnessed the very soul drain from Azul’s eyes. You have quite the talent, Kalim.”
Kalim doesn’t hear the underlying meaning or the backhanded barb in his statement. “He’s got time, doesn’t he?”
“That’s what he keeps saying. But deep down he knows.” Floyd watches Azul hurry to recover his composure before anyone can notice. “He’s leaving for his internship after school’s over and then graduation’s next spring. He’s running out of time.”
“Does (Name) like him? Maybe she’ll confess before he does!”
“That’s just it. He doesn’t know what Shrimpy feels for him. Been driving himself crazy all school year tryin’ to figure that one out.”
“I suspect he’s grown excessively cautious as a result of his fear of rejection,” Jade explains, dragging his fork through the buttercream smeared on his plate.
“But if he confesses now and she doesn’t feel the same, he’ll have all summer to recover.” Kalim turns his stare on you next. “(Name)’s always been nice. I’m sure she wouldn’t shatter his heart.”
“When you’re Azul, even the tiniest push is enough.” 
“Really? But he’s always so strong!”
Jade hums. “Three hearts are quite the boon-burden.”
“Only makes lovin’ someone that much worse. Cuz then you’re lovin’ ’em three times as much.”
“Isn’t that good? I think it’s sweet Azul cares about (Name) so much.”
“Sweet…” Jade shares a look with Floyd. Something unspoken passes between them. “Yes, I suppose that’s one way to put it.”
“Azul thinks it’s a pain in the ass. Throws him off his course and he loooves bein’ on his course.” 
Kalim stares a moment longer. “Maybe he needs a push in the right direction.”
“Liquid courage works wonders—”
“—or gives way to woe.”
“Nothing like that.” He doesn’t elaborate further, instead getting up and padding over to the bar with a cheerful bounce in his steps. “Hey, everyone, let’s take a picture!”
Riddle welcomes him with a warm smile. “Ah, hello there, Kalim.”
“You seem to be enjoying yourself,” Jamil comments, arms folding across his chest. Which, arguably, is worse because it can only spell trouble should Kalim find himself inspired.
“Way ahead of you!” You hold your Ghost Camera up, turning the lens on Kalim. Lighting up like the very sun in the sky, he poses just as you snap a photo. It takes a few moments for it to develop, but once it does you hand it over to him for his perusal. “Looking good as always.”
“Aww, thanks! Okay, your turn next! Let’s get a big group photo and then individual photos.” With the camera now in his possession, Kalim’s free to fidget with it as he pleases. “Ooh, this is neat!”
“Careful with that!” Jamil bounds forward just in case. “The Headmage gave that to (Name). Don’t break it.”
“I won’t,” Kalim promises, holding it up to capture you and Jamil in its sight. “I think I’ve got it! Everyone, group up! Picture time!”
There’s lots of fumbling. An argument about height breaks out. Floyd pokes fun at Riddle for having to stand in front to account for his height. Riddle fumes, red with anger, and stomps his foot indignantly—all while insisting he’s still growing. You offer to stand beside him, but he hisses at you like a cat: “Don’t patronize me! I’m of perfect, healthy stature for someone my age!”
Kalim looks on from behind the camera. “Actually, can we get (Name) and Azul together first?”
Azul, who had been in the process of adding to the joke with a comment of his own, hesitates. He peers at Kalim, his walls rising. “Me?”
“Yeah! Only fair to put you front and center. You’re the host, after all!”
“Ah, right. Of course. But then—”
“Why me?” you ask, confused. “If anything, I should stay out of the picture. I’m not a third year like the rest of you.”
Kalim gasps, scandalized. “We can’t do that! It doesn’t matter what year you are. You’re still our friend, and parties are for everyone to enjoy.”
“Doesn’t that throw off the original plan?” Ruggie wonders, munching on a frosted donut.
“Kalim, we need to account for height. Riddle can’t stand in the back.” Jamil glances apologetically at Riddle. “That’s just the reality of it.”
Riddle huffs, refusing to dignify that with a response.
“I’ll stand in the front,” Silver offers.
“What? No, that’s not the issue here, Silver.”
“It’s not? I thought we were picking who stands beside (Name).”
“Ooh, I wanna stand with Shrimpy!” Floyd wraps his arms around you from behind, resting his chin on your head. “C’mon, Sea Otter, take our pic!”
Jamil sighs. “All of you…”
“Shall we take individual photos with (Name) first?” Jade suggests, smiling placidly at Kalim.
This time the message is received loud and clear. “Oh, great idea, Jade! Azul and (Name), could you stand next to each other?”
The group disperses to allow you and Azul to do just that. Rigidly, Azul steps closer. He keeps a healthy distance between your bodies, one Jade picks up on right away.
“Please smile and pretend like you love each other,” he instructs, to which Azul flusters.
“W-What? Jade, that’s—”
“C’mere, Ashengrotto! I don’t bite!”
With a joyous laugh, you wrap your arm around Azul’s waist and drag him in close. He stumbles, flushed in the face, just as the camera flashes. The corresponding photo slides out next, blank for a while. Eventually, the image begins to show up with striking clarity.
“How’s it look? Great, right?” As soon as it happened, it’s gone—your warmth. The comfort of being held. Azul almost pursues you when you release him from your grasp and move towards Kalim to inspect the photo. Thankfully, he catches himself. “Hey, this is nice! Good job.”
You and Kalim share a high-five.
“Me next, Sea Otter!” Floyd crowds in, baring his pointed teeth in an unruly grin.
With everyone’s attention on you, Kalim, and the camera, Azul’s left to stand behind in silence. Anticipating the rainless deluge, Jade lingers within earshot.
“I know,” he mutters in a brittle tone. “Don’t say a word.”
“Not a peep. Although if I may share just a tiny tidbit… Kalim offered some very helpful advice. You may want to hear it.”
Azul stares at him, stunned. “You told Kalim?”
“Not directly, no. It was implied.” Jade averts his mismatched eyes on purpose. “More or less.”
“I should’ve made you and Floyd sign NDAs…”
“Is it really so sensitive?”
“Yes! Yes, of course it is!” Azul deflates with a sigh, looking on mournfully. You’re trying to snatch the camera from Floyd’s hands. He holds it up and out of reach, laughing raucously. “What did he say?”
“If you confess now, you’ll have the entire summer to mend your tattered heart.”
Azul barks out a short, hollow laugh. “In an ideal world, that’s easy.”
“You’re making it more difficult than it needs to be.” Jade issues an encouraging smile. “What’s the worst that can happen?”
“Are you seriously asking that?”
“It’s just something to consider.”
A minute ticks between them. Jade watches the scene alongside Azul, delighting in distant chaos.
“I’m afraid, Jade,” he admits quietly, the confession as soft and fragile as a single breath. “She’s everything and I’m…nothing.”
Jade frowns in disagreement.
“I’ve looked at it from every conceivable angle. There isn’t any calculated risk to be made—no potential profit or success to be had.”
“Are you certain?”
“Very.”
“Well, it doesn’t hurt to get it off your chest. We have a few weeks left before the break. If not your heart, perhaps you could establish a means to communicate?”
“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt… For the sake of networking—”
Jade chuckles. “Networking? Is that it?”
Azul scowls. “You’re awfully irritating tonight.”
“I’m not the one with his tentacles tied, hopelessly infatuated.” 
“You—”
“(Name), there’s something Azul would like to tell you,” Jade announces, and you turn to look at him.
Azul thinks he should just go ahead and die right there. Is it possible to spontaneously combust if he thinks about it long enough? Is such a phenomenon magic? All he needs to do is visualize it and then the spark will catch and—
“Yeah? What’s up, Azul?”
Azul flounders, his concentration broken. Like he’s done so many times in the past, he plasters his trademark smirk-grin on and falls into the shoes of the sleazy conman. “If you ever find yourself in need of study materials even after I’ve graduated, do not hesitate to contact me and I—”
You laugh. “I think I’ll be good. Thanks, though.”
With withering confidence, he chuckles. “I could give you quite the deal. You’d be missing out…”
You roll your eyes, unconvinced.
Jade—annoying, asshole Jade—brushes past, smooth as sea glass. “I shall take my leave, but please continue your chat. I believe there’s a camera waiting to capture the memory of me.”
Now it’s just you and Azul. He clears his throat, suddenly awkward.
“(Name), I—”
“Azul—”
“Oh.” He stares at you, a smile twitching on his lips. “You first.”
“No, no, you spoke before me.”
“Ah. Well…”
If you confess now, you’ll have the entire summer to mend your tattered heart. As if a love that’s been flowering for two years could possibly be resolved within the span of a few months.
He tries again even though it’s not what he really wants to say. “I do hope you’ll have a pleasant summer.”
“You as well.” You nudge him. “Kick ass at your internship.”
“I intend to.” Right. Internship. Work. Business. He can hold a normal conversation if that’s the topic. “And you? Do you plan to stay here?”
“Yeah. Crowley’s letting Grim and me live on campus since we don’t have anywhere else to go. I’ll work part-time in Craneport. Summer is a great season for tourism, but I shouldn’t have to tell you that.”
Azul laughs. “If it’s a family, they may spend more on kid’s menus for the novelty of it all. Be sure to talk it up to truly sell it. All children deserve to know the magic of a seasonal menu, do they not? Food in fun shapes. Fairy tales and sparkles. All of that razzmatazz. It’s the experience they’re paying for, after all.”
“Is that advice free?”
“Is it?”
“Fine, fine.” You dig through your pocket and hand him the photo from earlier. “Your payment, good sir. A memento of me.”
Azul takes it from you, admires your effortlessly pretty smile, and then freezes. “Oh, I look positively dreadful!”
“Not at all. It adds character.”
“A horrid sort of character.”
You sidle up beside him, peering at the picture. “I like it. It’s a photo of an imperfect Azul.”
“What an ambiguous compliment.”
“I’m serious! It’s Azul when he’s not acting. I like imperfect Azul. He’s authentic. A real person.” You pat him on the shoulder. He stiffens, betraying his initial nonchalance. “Or maybe not. One day I’ll catch you off guard.”
“We’ll see.”
“One day…” Your attention is stolen when you catch sight of the group attempting to bunch together for a selfie. Offering Azul that same smile he’s admired ever since he saw it, you add, “Have a fun summer. Don’t be a stranger next year, okay?” And then you’re bounding across the lounge. “Wait for me! I want in, too!”
For the rest of the semester, Azul keeps the photo tucked away in his phone case.
I have time to mull over the pros and cons, he tells himself when he departs through the mirror, summer break at his fingertips.
ii. summer - maybe i’m just too good. maybe i’ll run away. maybe i’m over you. maybe i shouldn’t stay. maybe i just don’t care. maybe i talk too much.
It occurs to you, while sorting through the photos you’ve taken throughout this past school year, that there’s an absurd amount of Azul. Whether on his own or with others, he appears in more photos than anyone else. You wonder how that happened—how you managed to be there for so many of his moments, each one documented in photographic permanence.
Some of them are humorous. Azul looking unimpressed when you lifted your camera to capture him. Grim jumping into his arms to demand snacks. His glasses sitting crooked on his face. Some of them are endearing. Azul reading in a comfortable nook in the library. Azul smiling fondly at the lens during an alchemy lesson. Azul laughing after you cracked a joke during PE. Some of them are animated. Azul waving at you from across the courtyard. Azul rolling his eyes at a dull pun. Azul playfully blowing a kiss to the camera after you told him to do something memorable. Some are special. Azul in his birthday robes. Azul during that time Mostro Lounge became a butler café for one week. Azul on his last day of the semester, leveling the camera with a roguish smirk.
This one—the most recent and last photo taken of him—is especially important. It’s the conversation that prompted an unforgettable expression that fills you with butterflies whenever you recall it.
“I think you’ll miss me,” you told him, elbowing him for good measure.
“I think I will,” he replied, his lips curling.
Unequipped to deliver a witty retort, you could only gawk.
“Don’t tell me that’s all it takes to shock you into silence.” He chuckled, and there was that infamous smirk-grin—sitting so perfectly on his face, as if it was meant to be there for this very exchange. “You’re too easy, (Name). Where’s the challenge?”
Wordlessly, you raised your Ghost Camera and snapped his picture.
There are so many facets to his person that you’ve managed to catch on your camera—complex layers you wouldn’t have otherwise witnessed if you hadn’t spent so much time around him.
Now you realize why you have an abundance of Azul photos.
We sure hung out a lot this year, and every time I had my camera…
Is he your muse? Is he just naturally photogenic? He fits into plenty of backgrounds, but it’s never the scenery that fascinates and bewitches. It’s always his expression, his body language, his emotions. And the reason all of these photos are so important is because this is an Azul who is comfortable enough to show these sides to you. An Azul who wants you to document his best and his worst, his beautiful and his ugly, his silly and his serious.
Sitting at your desk, thumbing through stacks of photos, you know he’s more than a muse. As you watch Azul move in various pictures, you wonder what he’s doing. It’s only a month into summer, but everything feels so slow. Campus has cleared out, and with it the lounge has closed for the season. You’re certain he still has his ways of making profit and spreading word of its wonders. Azul isn’t foolish. He’s always working an angle. Endlessly clever and stubbornly ambitious.
Does he miss me, too? you think, running your finger over his smiling face. Or was that just something he said to get a reaction?
Just then, a gut-wrenching thought lodges itself deep: Are we even friends? What if he thinks I’m a nuisance? Maybe he’s just tolerating me and all this time I’ve been delusional.
You glimpse the photos again, watching Azul laugh soundlessly in an animated loop. What am I to you, Azul?
As if on cue, having sensed your sadness, arms wrap around you from behind. For a second you think it’s Grim, but then you see distinctly human hands clasping together. You whirl, startled out of your skin, to find Azul Ashengrotto standing there.
“Wha… What?”
He’s…here. Azul is standing in your bedroom.
You blink once and he remains. You blink twice and he’s still there, gazing down at you with soft, smiling features.
“Hello to you as well.”
“Hey…?” You pat his cheek and flinch away. “Oh, you’re real!”
“Of course I am! Why wouldn’t I be?” Chuckling, he withdraws and moves to stand at your deskside. “I’m wounded. To think you would forget me just like that. And I thought I was plenty memorable.” He blows you a mock kiss then, and that’s when it finally strikes you.
This isn’t your Azul. This is an Azul from your photos.
How is this even possible? you think, scrambling to find which picture—which memory—he’s from. In doing so, you remember a particularly unique fact about the Ghost Camera. It’s a magical device that allows a photographer to capture slivers of their subject’s soul, which gives way to a special sort of connection known as a soulbond. The deeper the bond, the more likely the person in the photographs is to take on animation and, in some cases, slip out of the image that contains them.
So this is Azul from the time at which he was last photographed, you determine, holding up pictures to match his corporeal likeness to that of the scenery. The Ghost Camera is so cool…
“I missed you, you know.”
“Did you now?” He leans in close, curious. “How much?”
You push him away with a weak scoff. This isn’t good for your heart. Any closer and you might say something you’ll come to regret.
“Not as much as you think.”
“Is that so?” His gaze pans over to the pile of photos on your desk. “And these photos are simply here for convenience?”
“D-Don’t worry about it! Summer project. You wouldn’t get it.”
He flashes his teeth at you in a bright, competitive grin. “Try me.”
“You’re so nosy. Don’t you get tired of prying?”
“Not in the slightest.” He leans against the desk, his arms folding casually over his chest. “That’s besides the point. You’re avoiding the subject at hand.”
You turn in your chair and open your mouth to reply—why are you so invested in this?—but a better idea crops up. Meeting his cerulean stare with fierce, fiery eyes, you challenge him: “If it matters so much to you, I could be convinced to share my plans for the small price of one kiss. A real kiss. Not that fake one from before.”
Azul blinks back at you, a smirk crawling onto his face. “Is that all you desire?”
“What do you mean by—”
Your question is cut off when another set of arms embraces you from behind. Warm, soft lips press against your cheek; his breath tickles your ear.
“Are two not better than one?”
With a yelp, you jerk back so fast that you almost fall out of your chair. Standing there, looking very proud of himself, is another Azul. But this one, unlike Dorm Azul, is dressed in his school uniform. A very helpful distinction.
“D-Don’t sneak up on me like that!”
It’s the only coherent sentence you can manage. Your mind is a panicked muddle: I can’t believe it. Two Azuls. Am I dreaming? This is definitely a dream, right? There’s no way he’d kiss me on the…
You slap your hand over your cheek, gasping. “Y-You kissed me?!”
“Is that not the price you wanted me to pay?” School Azul asks, one brow raised as if daring you to deny that fact.
Dorm Azul’s fingers curl under your chin, guiding your gaze towards him. “Unless you’d like to raise the price…”
You swallow thickly. This can’t be happening.
“Of course, in raising the price, it’s expected you raise the value of the information you’re willing to divulge,” School Azul adds with a chuckle. “Is that not fair?”
You shrink under both of their insistent stares. “W-Why do you even wanna know?”
“Why not? Any information is good information so long as it’s useful.”
You scoff, but it comes out choked and shy. “I… I’m going to use these photos to put together a present for you. I know your birthday’s so far away, but I’m getting a head start.”
“And this present would entail…?”
You click your tongue at him. “I already paid my half for that kiss. No more.”
“Aah, is that right?” Dorm Azul leans in, kissing dangerously close to your lips. You reach up to touch the corner of your mouth after he’s pulled away. “How much for the full story?”
“How much are you willing to pay?”
School Azul rests his chin on your shoulder. His hands settle on your waist, pulling you up from your seat. This proximity allows you to feel his hair as it brushes against your face. Dorm Azul closes the distance as if it’s second nature, and now you’re sandwiched between the both of them.
Your heart stumbles in your chest. He’s quite literally surrounding you, but you wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.
“A very valid question.” Dorm Azul glances coyly at School Azul. “What do you think, Me?”
“Will we be enough for you, (Name)?” he purrs, rubbing slow circles into your hips.
You’re dizzy in their arms, your entire body warming with anticipation and embarrassment alike. Is it okay to be selfish? Even though this isn’t technically Azul—just mere memories of him—it seems so real. He’s holding you, touching you, reaching for you…
“Hmm. Two does seem to be a bit much.”
“Let’s call it a holiday and say it’s seasonal spoiling.”
“A gift for the summer.”
“Do open the window to let in the breeze. The heat is prone to making one feel rather…stuffy.”
They’re doing this on purpose. Maybe another Azul is more troublesome than I once thought. I can only handle so much charm!
Shrugging off self-doubt, you grab Dorm Azul by his lapels and yank him towards you, sealing the space that once separated your mouths in a hungry kiss. He melts against you, eyes fluttering shut. It’s quick and starved, the way you chase each other’s lips. You cling to him before you can fall, arms looped around his neck to keep him near.
Fully clothed and achingly desperate, you loathe the unbearable heat, but nothing is more molten than the space between your thighs.
Meanwhile, School Azul takes his sweet time running his hands along your sides, up the length of your body until he reaches your chest. With his form pinned to yours, you can feel his erection pressing against your ass. Rather shamelessly, he rolls his hips. You’re pushed up against Dorm Azul next, who takes hold of your hand and guides it to the strain in his slacks. He pulls away briefly to allow School Azul to slide your shirt up and over your head.
“Were you anticipating this?” he whispers, taking hold of your breasts.
“No way,” you protest between kisses. “Not… No. K-Keep dreaming. It’s too much trouble to wear one in the summer. Gets hot and—”
Dorm Azul captures your lips in another ravenous smooch, and the objection dies in your throat.
“There’s no need for these pesky articles where I’m from,” School Azul murmurs. He presses kisses into your bare shoulder, humming his very obvious delight. “You’d have already been laid out beneath me if that were the case… Soft and sweet, all mine to love at the bottom of the sea…”
“Humans have so many steps,” Dorm Azul laments, tutting.
“And merfolk don’t?” You try to sound smart with your question, but it comes out breathless when your nipple’s twisted between two fingers. “Oh…”
“Not when it comes to clothing. The very concept doesn’t exist beneath the waves.”
“You could visit sometime and see for yourself. I’ll welcome you with open arms.” Dorm Azul rests his forehead against yours. “And maybe then you’ll find yourself so taken with my home that you’ll want to stay.”
“A tempting offer.”
“But?” he prompts, his gaze falling to your hand as you palm him through his pants. He inhales a shaky breath.
“What’s stopping you?” the other Azul asks, his voice muffled in your skin.
“Firstly, I’m not a mer.”
“My dear, that’s nothing. Have you forgotten my proficiency in potionology?”
“And how much will one of your potions cost? I’d love to visit, but if it’s going to bankrupt me—”
“For you, a single kiss is all I require.”
“Isn’t that awfully cheap?”
Dorm Azul chuckles at this back-and-forth. “You say that as if you want me to charge an exorbitant amount.”
Glaring, you squeeze him out of revenge. His laughter comes out choked next, replaced with a needy whimper. Unbelievable.
“Maybe I do.”
“I would be careful with those words, dearest. I might take them to heart.”
He ruts against your hand, panting into your mouth. The kiss is sloppy and wet, all tongue and saliva. You move on instinct, grabbing at his shoulders when you’re taken to bed next. Both Azuls peer down at you from where they kneel on either side of you. They issue you hazy, lust-drunk smiles. Hands wander, feeling every inch you have to offer. You shut your eyes and submit to titillating touches.
“You really did miss me,” School Azul remarks when his fingers slip into your shorts to rub you through your sodden panties. Your breath hitches, a strangled whine squeezed from your throat, and he laughs. “I missed you, too.”
“I really like you,” you blurt, chest heaving with your every breath. He squeezes your clit to draw another sinful groan from you. “I think—Azul, you’re so—I think you’re so amazing… I wish we talked more. The year—aah… It went by so fast.”
“It did, didn’t it?”
“I wanna know you—the real you. I wanna know what Azul’s like when he’s comfortable and when he’s sad and when he’s happy. I wanna—ooh! Please… Please, Azul…” You grab fistfuls of the sheets, arching up towards the hands that caress your stomach lovingly. “I just want you.”
“And you’ll have me,” he—you’re not sure which—promises, leaning over to kiss you. It’s soulful passion, lust bleeding into love. Your cries are lost on his lips when you come undone beneath him, buoyant on a mellow wave.
You sense the loss before you see it.
Half-nude and gasping for breath, you stare up at the ceiling. Your bedroom is empty. All that remains of the Azuls are the animated memories imprinted on the photographs.
“I’m losing my mind…” you mutter, draping your arm over your eyes.
Please let summer pass quickly.
iii. winter - maybe all we are is fools with hearts that tried too hard. and maybe that’s just fine as long as you’re here in my arms.
Azul paces restlessly in his VIP room. It’s been months since he’s seen you, but his heart hasn’t swayed in the slightest. If anything, he’s only grown fonder in the time spent apart. Absence… What a bothersome thing.
“You’re gonna walk yourself into the floor, y’know. Your shoes’ll be all worn out by the time you’re done.”
“I’m aware,” Azul quips, uncharacteristically jittery. He turns towards Floyd. “Do I look presentable? Is anything crooked or misplaced? How about my hair?”
“You’re fine.” At Azul’s disbelieving glower, Floyd pouts. “I mean it. Shrimpy’s gonna like it either way.”
He bristles, defensive. “Who said anything about (Name)?”
“No one, but you’re thinkin’ it.”
“I… T-That’s besides the point! It doesn’t matter. She’s only here because I invited her. Common courtesy and all that.”
“Mm, I dunno about that one.”
Azul frowns at the vault set into the wall behind his desk. If only he could pack all of his fears in there and lock them away for good. Then he could continue masquerading as someone fearless and confident. With winter having descended upon campus, bringing with it layers of fluffy, glittering snow, and the cultural festival having concluded successfully, Azul finds himself lost.
This is the last birthday he’ll celebrate at Night Raven College and, subsequently, the last February he’ll spend with you. He’s running out of time.
“Invitation or not, Shrimpy’ll always wish you a happy birthday. S’not like her to forget. Plus, she cares about ya.”
“You can’t be sure of that.”
Azul’s tone is so sharp that Floyd raises his hands in defense. “Guess not.”
“What would you do?” He inhales a wobbly breath. “If you were in my shoes…”
Floyd scratches the back of his neck, contemplative. “Dunno. Guess I’d wait for the right moment and say somethin’ to get it outta my system.”
Azul sighs. “Jade said something similar.”
“He ain’t wrong.”
“I’m not prepared.”
“No one is.” Floyd smiles at Azul’s baffled expression. “C’mon, Azul, you can plan all you want, but you know life’s never gonna go the way you want it to. S’just how it is.”
“Even so, it’s better to know all viable routes and options before diving into uncharted waters.”
“That’s just it. You can’t know. S’kinda the whole point, ain’t it?”
“I can’t do it,” he decides, the words heavy on his tongue. “I’d rather accept my future failure now than continue working towards it.”
“Like a coward.���
“Far from it! In business, that’s known as rescission. It is a completely valid method of—”
“You ever realize your feelings and business are two separate things? Not everything’s gotta be about business.”
Azul stands there, nonplussed.
Floyd makes for the door, stopping only to add, “Your fly’s unzipped, by the way.”
“You—” He scrambles to check. Much to his relief, it’s not. “Honestly… That’s not even funny.”
He smooths nonexistent wrinkles, schools his expression into something brave, and exhales slowly. I’m not going to ruin an occasion as grand as this with a half-baked confession.
Having made up his mind, he steps through the door out into the bustling lounge. Like clockwork, all eyes turn to him. He searches the crowd for you, hopeful. But before he can locate you, party poppers resound with a loud bang. Confetti trickles down like colorful rainfall, landing on his suit and getting stuck in his hair.
“Happy birthday, Azul!”
He wants to run and hide. He wants to dive into the sea and seek solace in his favorite octopus pot. He wants to bury himself in the sand and disappear.
Instead, he smiles and spreads his arms like he’s just pulled off an astounding magic trick. “Why, thank you, everyone! I’m pleased you could make it. Do enjoy yourselves to the fullest tonight.”
Cheers erupt amongst the partygoers, but they might as well be on a completely different island. Azul turns, hoping to make his rounds and escape, but Kalim intercepts him. Jamil isn’t far behind.
“Azul, happy birthday!” Kalim smiles just as Jamil catches up.
He passes two expertly wrapped gifts into Azul’s empty hands. “On behalf of Kalim and myself, thank you for the invitation.”
“Yeah, super thanks! It’s been so much fun. I hope you’ll like your gift, but if you don’t just let me know and I’ll get you something else. Whatever you want! You deserve it on your special day.”
Azul looks past him, not in the mood to entertain. “Yes, of course. It’s not a problem.”
Jamil raises a brow, but then it clicks. “(Name) wanted me to pass on her regards.”
As expected, that draws his attention. “Why’s that?”
“She wasn’t sure if she’d get to see you on your big, busy day.” Jamil eyes Azul knowingly.
Kalim nods. “We ran into her on the way here, but she said to go on without her.”
Azul doesn’t like the way they’re both looking at him—as if they’re in on some joke he’s not currently aware of.
“Well,” he says, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, “her regards are well-received.”
“You’re not going to meet her?”
“It’s my big, busy day, isn’t it? I’m afraid she’ll have to catch me at her earliest convenience.” Azul, gifts in hand, smiles. “Please do enjoy the party, you two. Thank you again for your thoughtful gifts and birthday wishes.”
On his way to the table designed for gifts, Azul spots Riddle, Silver, and Ruggie. They stand off to the side, chatting amongst themselves. He supposes, if anything, he might as well say hello. Setting the gifts down, Azul struts over.
“Good evening, gentlemen. I do hope you’re enjoying yourselves.”
“You know it. Parties at Octavinelle are always somethin’ else,” Ruggie says. Unsurprisingly, he’s done well to fix himself a plate and more. With him around Azul doesn’t have to fret over food waste.
“Your presentation at the cultural festival was very informative, if I may say so,” Riddle commends, sipping his fizzy beverage.
“As was yours.” Azul’s smile tightens. For some reason, he’s always felt the need to walk on eggshells around Riddle. And for good reason, too! Whatever Azul seems to accomplish, no matter how lofty a feat, Riddle seems to do better. “I’m sure you’ve had quite the rewarding experience yourself.”
“Indeed.”
“It’s good timing,” Silver notes, and all eyes drift towards him. Azul perks up. Timing. He needs more of that. “Your birthday came right after the festival. It’s almost like celebrating your hard work and another healthy year all in one.”
“Never thought about it that way. Guess it makes sense when you put it like that.” Ruggie grins cheekily. “Lucky you, Azul.”
“I wouldn’t call it luck. The dates just happened to align… Either way, thank you, Silver. I’m pleased you can look at it with such inspiring positivity.”
“You catch up with (Name) yet?”
“No? Am I meant to?”
“Just asking.” Ruggie shrugs. “She had me run a few errands for her yesterday. Said it was all for your sake, but when I tried to get more info outta her she told me I’d have to wait for ‘the big reveal’—whatever that is.”
Now everyone’s looking at him. Azul feels small.
“With how often I’ve heard her name tonight, I’d think she’s the one with the birthday.”
“Is she really so popular today? Odd. I haven’t had the chance to greet her,” Riddle muses.
“I thought I saw her this afternoon.” Silver furrows his brow, uncertain. “She seems busy.”
“Which is precisely why I can’t fathom the insistence that I ought to have met with her already.”
Ruggie tilts his head. “That the only reason?”
Just how many people are in on this asinine joke? More importantly, which eel is he going to have to wring out for spilling a not-so-secret secret?
Azul realizes his mask is slipping and so he repairs it expertly. If Ruggie takes notice of this, he doesn’t say anything. “It’s bad manners to show up late to a party. I’m sure one of us will agree.”
Riddle nods, but his words are surprisingly lenient. “Life happens. I suppose we can’t fault (Name) entirely.”
“She’ll make it. I’m sure she will. Don’t worry, Azul,” Silver reassures.
He’s not. He won’t. He isn’t.
“If the world was ending tomorrow,” Ruggie says, sliding into a new subject with practiced finesse, “what would you all do?”
“The end of the world…” Riddle frowns. “That’s impossible.”
“It’s a hypothetical. Anything’s possible.”
Silver hums thoughtfully. “I’d spend what time I have left with my loved ones.”
“You sure you’re not just gonna go running back to Briar Valley to protect Malleus?”
“As a guard it’s my duty, but fighting against the inevitable would be pointless.” Silver looks to the rest of them for their input. “If the world is ending and there’s nothing a guard like myself can do to prevent it, then I can only offer what’s left of my time.”
“So companionship. Okay, good to know. What about you, Riddle?”
He huffs. “I refuse to let the world end before I’ve accomplished my goals.”
“Yikes. You academic types don’t rest, do you?”
“No, no, it’s true,” Azul pipes up. “I agree. Why am I going to let the world get in the way of my plans?”
“So both of you are going to resist it until the very end?”
“You said anything can happen in a hypothetical, yes?” Riddle smirks. “In my hypothetical the world says it’ll end tomorrow, but it never does. It keeps saying so like it’s a faulty forecast. The end of the world is scheduled for next week, the week after, three weeks from now. By then, a year’s passed and the world still hasn’t ended.”
Ruggie groans. “That defeats the whole purpose of my question. You can’t give yourself more time when it’s already so limited.”
“Anything is possible if you know what you’re working with,” Azul adds, nodding alongside Riddle. “I quite like this hypothetical.”
“Leave it to the honors students to logic it out and make it more complicated than it needs to be…”
“You wouldn’t spend it with your loved ones?” Silver asks, but it appears as if the question is directed entirely at Azul. “I think I’d want to tell them the things I never got to say. Things I put off saying… Would you do that, too, Azul?”
“I…” He shuts his mouth and then opens it. “I’m not sure what I could possibly say within such a limited timeframe.”
“It doesn’t have to be complex.”
“I guess a good, old ‘love you lots’ is better than nothing,” Ruggie says.
Azul stops short. The end of the world. Time. Loss. Loved ones.
Time! He’s running out of time!
“Well, this was quite the lively discussion, but I’m afraid I’ll have to excuse myself now. There are a few more people I must meet.” Azul smiles gratefully at the three of them. They wish him another happy birthday before he finally departs, his heart in his throat.
He’s running out of time.
Logically, Azul knows the feeling doesn’t reflect his reality. It’s not as if he has to confess by the end of the school year. Logically, he has his entire life to confess. But who’s to say you’ll stay in his life after he graduates? You might be gone by the time he finally finds the right words, the right time, the right circumstance.
You can plan all you want, but you know life’s never gonna go the way you want it to.
Floyd’s right. There’s no way of knowing for sure until he does it. There’s no way to know what lies in those uncharted waters until he dives in. There’s no way to know where your heart lies until he confesses.
The world isn’t going to end tomorrow, but if he doesn’t say what he needs to before graduation he’ll never have another chance. And then that world—the world contained within NRC’s boundaries—will implode and that will be that.
At that very moment, a camera flashes. He spins around to search the photographer out and—
There you are, striding through throngs of people to reach him. There you are, dressed for the occasion. There you are, wearing that pretty smile he sees in his dreams.
“Happy birthday!” You turn the photo towards him for his viewing pleasure. It’s of him, staring off into space. He looks so stone-faced with his knitted brows and pursed lips. “Sorry about showing up late. I had to add the finishing touches to your present.”
You hand it to him. The amateur wrapping job makes the gift appear more lumpy than it actually is. It’s heavy like a textbook. Shaped as such, too. Azul wonders what its contents could be. Perhaps something relating to economics? A novel in a particular genre?
“Thank you very much. I’ll take good care of both.” He tucks the picture into his breastpocket, battling the urge to tear into your gift now. He needs to know. What did you get him? What could it possibly be? “I’m glad you could make it.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world!”
“Even if the world was ending?”
“Uh… What?”
“Ah, never mind that. It was simply a lingering thought from a previous conversation.”
“That’s so grim! And on your birthday, no less.”
Azul waves his hand through the air. A playful smile draws his lips apart. “Can you believe Riddle said he’d make the apocalypse wait on his behalf?”
“Seriously?” You snort, eyes brightening with amusement. “Even the apocalypse gets a schedule…”
He barks out a laugh. “Insanity, isn’t it?”
“Maybe for us, but definitely not for Riddle.” You glance at him. “What about you? What does Azul Ashengrotto’s last day look like?”
He intends to answer with something prepackaged: Awash in success until the very end!
“Alone.”
“Really? No friends or family by your side?”
“Would that make it better? Perhaps being surrounded by others only intensifies the dread.”
There’s some sort of symbolism in coming into the world alone and going out the same. Azul just can’t quite phrase it eloquently.
“Maybe there’s no right answer. Maybe there’s not any comfort in it either.” You run your fingers over the edges of your Ghost Camera. “We can’t know what lies ahead until we’re there. Maybe that’s why we spend so much time theorizing.”
“Quite the insightful judgment.”
“For the record, I wouldn’t mind being your plus-one for the end of the world.”
“I’m flattered.” He grins. “I shall be yours in return.”
“No strings attached?”
“All the strings attached. So many,” he exaggerates.
“No fair!”
Silence fills in the cracks. You stand side by side, drinking in Mostro Lounge’s upbeat atmosphere. After some time, you nudge him.
“Look at us, speaking about all of these sad things. It’s your birthday, not a funeral!”
He wonders if now’s a good time. Should he lighten the mood and confess? But wouldn’t that just make it even more serious and somber? Is there ever going to be an opportune moment?
You can plan all you want, but you know life’s never gonna go the way you want it to.
Surprises. Spontaneity. Luck. All things left to chance. All things Azul attempts to anticipate. He thinks back on the many plans and what-ifs he calculated and wonders if it was worth it.
“(Name), I just wanted to say—” He stops himself, his fingers curling around the gift cradled in his arms. I love you and I want you in my life. I don’t want the world to end here with you and me. I want to know what lies beyond and experience it with you—the good and the bad. Everything. “I just wanted to thank you.”
For being my friend. For being yourself. For existing in the same world as me, even if it feels like we’re doomed to be islands apart.
“What’s this? Genuine thanks? Am I going to find an anemone on my head next?”
“That can be arranged. Isn’t it tradition to grant the person of the hour one birthday favor?”
“Hah! You wish!”
I do. I really do.
The party wears on into the night. Azul repeats the same mantra as before: I have time.
When he’s in his room, gifts piled high on his desk, he sits back in his seat and carefully unwraps yours. It’s a book, leather-bound and regal. It looks expensive. While attempting to approximate its value, he reads the title spelled out with alphabet stickers: My Azul. His brow furrows. Just what are you playing at here?
Cautiously, he opens the book to the first page. Your writing winks back at him: Happy birthday, Azul! This is my gift to you. It’s a chronological journal of your school life! :D People often say it’s difficult to picture themselves through the eyes of others, so I wanted to show you what I see every time I look at you. I hope you’ll never forget just how important you are. If you ever do, open this book to remind yourself.
With love always,
(Name).
“Curious,” he mumbles, flipping the page. The layout reminds him of a scrapbook. You’ve decorated it with stickers and patterned tape, scrawled words in different colored inks. There are two photographs—each from Azul’s second year. He’d forgotten about these. That time it snowed so much the students had a snowball fight in the courtyard. That time an alchemy accident (courtesy of Grim) led to Azul speaking in cat for the rest of the day.
In the center, a small blurb reads: My Azul is terrifyingly good at making snowballs within record time, just as he’s terrifyingly good at marketing them at all the right moments. My team was totally losing. Leave it to Azul to swoop in when he knows it’s advantageous… He’s intelligent and passionate. Even when mistakes occur, he works through them effortlessly. (Although it was nice having Catzul for a day!)
He rolls his eyes at that last bit.
The next page displays photos in much the same fashion. You’ve clearly put lots of effort and thought into each arrangement. Azul feels like he’s walking through a museum with every page. Like the first, the rest of the pages that follow include photographs of himself (some with others and some with you) and a short paragraph describing your observations.
His eyes are on the verge of a typhoon as he soaks in every sugared sentence.
My Azul is strong. My Azul is silly. My Azul has the best laugh. My Azul is great at bargaining. My Azul is awkward. My Azul is clumsy (in the best ways). My Azul is resourceful. My Azul makes the best study guides (thank you!!!!). My Azul is a hero. My Azul never gives up. My Azul is a talented mage. My Azul is…
All of these things he’s never heard anyone acknowledge before—have you always seen him in this way? Is this truly what he’s like through your eyes? He finds that hard to believe, and yet there he is on the page, winking at the camera or posing in an outfit from one of the many school trips he’s attended. You’ve added little comments and doodles in the margins and corners. Azul smiles as he reads them.
Noble Bell College sure was something! I’d like to visit again one day…
Vargas Camp was exhausting! I still can’t believe we survived.
Halloween! I want to experience it in the Coral Sea one day. But maybe just for one night. An endless Halloween is too much…
The ceremonial robes are very pretty. They’re so different from the uniforms in my world.
Happy Beans Day! Azul prepares all year for this. That level of commitment is impressive!
Azul reaches the end with watery eyes. He sniffles, so enveloped in a love he’s never felt from any friend before. You care. You truly, honestly care. It’s clear in each and every page—in the words you’ve written. You care about him.
The final page has a blank space the rough shape and size of a photograph. For some reason he understands what he’s meant to do. He slides the photograph you gave him all that time ago from his phone case and pastes it to the space. And then he reads what’s written below.
My Azul keeps all of these walls up in order to protect himself. He’s sensitive and self-conscious. He likes to uphold a perfect image at all times. He likes to keep his weaknesses hidden, his cards close. But then he’s also funny. He’s sincere and gentle. He’s sweet. He’s someone I admire from all sides, good and bad. Even when he’s scheming, even when he’s acting, he’s still Azul. My camera’s captured so many of his moments, which is very apparent now that you’ve made it to the end. But I’m happy to have documented these moments because they showcase everything that makes my Azul himself.
My Azul has never looked “positively dreadful” to my camera. Even on the days where he feels like nothing, my Azul is everything to me. I will always think so.
He’s crying. He can’t help it.
Azul sits there and he sobs.
He sobs until his throat is dry, until his eyes are blotchy and red. He sobs until he can’t anymore.
Holding the book close to his chest, he wonders how he ever managed to befriend someone like you.
An angel. That’s what you are.
An angelfish.
And he’s Azul. Your Azul.
iv. spring - but, baby, i’ll be there. yeah, baby, i’ll be there. it’s been a little hard. i’ve been a little tough. but maybe all along i’m afraid, i’m afraid, i’m afraid. i’m afraid, i’m afraid, i’m afraid.
The air is sweet with the scent of blossoming flowers, thick with pollen. Azul’s chest is light, swelling with excitement. A new chapter is about to begin. In just a few hours he’ll graduate along with the rest of his peers and then it’s off to start another story. For Azul, this is just a continuation of something already so prolific.
He strolls past The Great Seven, pausing briefly to admire the Sea Witch in all of her tentacular glory.
“With this weather, it’s almost difficult to imagine they called for rain.” Jade peers up at the sun, shielding its obtrusive rays with one hand.
“They’re always gettin’ it wrong,” Floyd says, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “So annoying. I was hopin’ it’d rain and then they’d cancel.”
“Unlikely. There are always contingency plans put in place when it comes to an event as momentous as graduation.”
“Bleh. Lame. I wanna skip. I hate bein’ in those stuffy clothes, packed in close like a sardine.”
“If you’re absent, you won’t receive your diploma.”
“What a scam.”
Jade simply smiles. Ironic.
Azul turns around to look at them. “Four years… Gone in a blink. Will either of you miss it?”
“It was certainly enjoyable. I admit there are some aspects I’ll miss quite fiercely.”
“Guess it’ll be a bummer not seein’ everyone all the time. I’m gonna miss playing with Baby Seal and Shrimpy.”
“I’ll miss them, too.” Azul sighs. “(Name) especially…”
“You still haven’t told her?” Floyd raises a brow. “You’re gonna leave without sayin’ a word?”
“That does seem to be the plan,” Jade answers.
“I… I’ve thought it over.” He clears his throat. No time for waterworks. He needs to be in top shape if he’s to deliver the opening speech as Salutatorian. Riddle took first place, which wasn’t a shock to anyone. He always did say he’d make Valedictorian no matter what. Azul had been keen to fight him for it, even if it became clear he’d never surpass him. Second place is irksome, but it has its merits. Although he isn’t going to settle with just that! He’ll get first place one of these days. “We’re better off friends.”
“Whatever you say.”
“Is that enough?”
“Is what enough?”
“Her friendship.”
“It’ll have to be.” Azul’s gaze glazes over.
He’s run out of time, but maybe that’s okay. Maybe that was meant to be.
“Well, let’s not dwell on it any further!” He claps his hands and turns swiftly on his heel. “There’s still work to be done.”
Jade and Floyd exchange furtive glances. They know as well as he does that he’s lying.
But maybe that was also meant to be.
— — —
Crowley tasked you with snapping photos for NRC’s yearbook. “Because I am a paragon of magnanimity,” he said, “I am entrusting this very important task to you once more. Take lots of pictures! Don’t miss a single moment!”
You do just that, photographing the graduates as they wait in a room behind the stage, chattering eagerly amongst themselves. You raise your camera to document Azul when he stands at the podium to give his salutation speech. You do the same for Riddle when it’s his turn. The ceremony is grand, ballooning with emotion. You look on with a cheek-splitting smile, proud of every student who crosses the stage. It’s bittersweet. The friends you made when you were enrolled as a first year are now moving on in life.
Time flies. What a whirlwind year it’s been.
When it’s Azul’s turn and he goes down the line to shake the hands of his professors and Crowley, you wave at him from your place in the audience. He meets your eyes from where he stands, and he smiles.
Your camera catches that moment in perfect permanence.
By the end of it all, your face hurts from smiling, your throat sore from cheering, your hands raw from clapping. Grim grumbles at you to knock it off with the sun shower, your tears dampening his fur. You wipe your eyes and sniffle. “I’m happy for them. It’s a good day.”
He forces his head under your palm, allowing you to pet him and cry through it in peace. He doesn’t say anything. You don’t need him to.
While the graduates meet up with their family and friends, you make your rounds. Kalim introduces you to his parents and siblings—all thirty-something of them. You’re in a daze by the time introductions are finished, and Jamil leans over to whisper, “No need to commit everyone to memory.”
“Have you talked to Azul yet?” Kalim asks after everything has settled down.
You shake your head. “Why? What’s up?”
“Just wanted to ask. I know the Headmage wants you to take lots of pictures.”
“We shouldn’t keep you any longer than we already have,” Jamil adds with a curt nod.
You smile. “Congrats, both of you. Good luck.”
“We gotta keep in touch. Promise me you’ll call whenever you can. You’re always welcome to visit, too! Oh, I’ll go check with my parents now! I’m sure they’ll say yes!” Kalim bounds off in their direction.
“Just let me know well in advance. That way I can plan for proper accommodations,” Jamil says, following Kalim with sharp eyes.
“I’ll do that.” You turn to leave and then stop. “I hope you get your vacation one day, Jamil.”
He stares at you, mystified, before a gentle smile softens on his face. “One day,” he echoes. “I hope you’ll find your way home.”
“One day.”
The two of you share a final look before going your separate ways.
Surrounded in such an energetic environment, talking to and meeting families, you find yourself longing for your loved ones. So much time has passed. You wonder how they’re doing. Are they well? Are they worried?
“Aah, it’s Shrimpy!” Floyd crashes into you with so much force you nearly topple. He steadies you with a giggle. “Where’s Baby Seal?”
“Left to gorge on refreshments. Hey, since you’re here, can I get your picture?”
“Course you can.”
Detaching himself, he poses for you. You take a few photos, mirroring his good mood.
“Are your parents around?”
“Mhm!”
“Seriously? They came?”
“Course they did.”
“Did they take transformation potions?”
Floyd nods. “Pops does land business sometimes, so he’s used to it. Mama doesn’t leave home much. She’s real bad at walking on her feet.”
“Ah, got it.”
Floyd grins down at you. “You wanna meet ’em?”
“Maybe later… I’ve gotta keep taking photos.”
“I gotcha. Make sure to snap a few of Azul.”
“Right! Speaking of him, where is he? I’ve spoken to everyone but him.”
Floyd peers out across a sea of faces, scanning each one like a predator sizing up his next meal. “He’s avoidin’ ya.”
“What? Why?”
“Why don’tcha ask him when you see him? Bet he’ll have a fun answer for ya.”
You would, if only you could find him. As the afternoon wears on, you begin to lose hope. If he’s truly hiding from you, he’s doing a great job of it. After what feels like hours of walking in aimless circles, you take pause to consider the situation. If you were Azul and you wanted to hide away for a little while, where would you go?
To someplace familiar. To someplace comfortable. To someplace quiet.
He’s pacing in front of Ramshackle when you arrive. You open the gate and step through, taking each step one at a time. Once you’re within a close enough proximity, you make your presence known.
“Azul?”
He startles and whips around. As soon as he sees you, he lurches forward, intending to leave.
You block his path. “Hey, wait! What gives? I’ve been looking all over for you. Floyd told me you’re avoiding me.”
“Floyd doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
“But I’m sure you do. So what’s up?”
“It’s…nothing. I merely wanted to tour campus one last time.”
“Oh. Why didn’t you say anything? I would’ve come with you!” You attempt to elbow him, but he side-steps you. “Uh, right…”
“Ah, sorry. I… Admittedly, there’s quite a lot on my mind.”
“I get it. Congrats, by the way. Your speech was really good.”
“I’m pleased you think so.”
This…isn’t Azul, you realize, a frown flickering on your face. At least not the Azul I usually see.
“I got to meet all of Kalim’s siblings.”
“Did you? All of them?”
“Every. Single. One. His family’s huge!”
An uncomfortable silence festers between the two of you. You glance at your camera and then at Azul.
“Can you believe that Crowley? He wanted me to take all of these pictures, but there were dozens of professionals who did it much better than me! What was even the point?”
“Terrible, isn’t it? A job as good as the one you do deserves proper payment.”
“Exactly! My services aren’t free.”
Azul smiles, a wistful gloss to his gaze. You can see the cogs turning behind his eyes—can see the calculation as it comes to fruition.
“You can cry. I won’t judge.”
“I’m not going to.”
“It’s fine. It’s normal, Azul.”
He inhales a deep breath, holds it for three seconds, and then releases. When he looks at you next, his expression is hard and riddled with subdued anxiety. A zephyr blows between you, rustling the leaves in the trees, raking through the grass, dragging wispy fingers through your clothes and hair. The quiet expands and stretches wide.
Azul opens his mouth, shuts it, and sighs. A forlorn resignation flits over his countenance.
“I—” he swallows hard and then it just bursts free, the admission he’s kept secret for so long— “I love you.”
Another breeze combs through the premises. Your gasp is swept away with it.
“I’ve loved you for two years. And I… I wanted to tell you so many times in the past, but I never could. I was scared and I ran away. I still am! The truth is that I’m afraid of losing you. I’m afraid of messing up in front of you and looking like a fool. I’m afraid of showing you the parts of myself I hate most. I’m even afraid of that phrase—of saying it because it terrifies me to think, in some distant world, it might be reciprocated. But I have to say it, and I want you to know. Even if you don’t feel the same, I have to tell you.”
You gape at him, utterly speechless. The longer you do so, the more flustered he becomes.
“Y-You’re free to think it’s gross or weird. I understand I’m not the most ideal candidate, but I…” He wrings his hands, exhaling shakily. “I think you’re everything. My whole world.”
There are so many things you want to say. So, so many. But they’re all jumbled, carried along like flowers floating down a stream in spring. You close the gap, taking his hands in yours, and you kiss him.
Azul startles, squeaking against your lips. It takes a minute for him to find his rhythm, but soon he’s wilting against you, his body relaxed. You taste saliva and salt—tears. When you pull back, he’s crying.
“I think you’re the most ideal candidate. I’ve always thought so.” You cradle his cheek in a warm hand.
A sob trembles through him. “I never thought—you’re just so… I couldn’t have imagined…”
“That I’d like you?”
“Yes!”
“Why?” “Because…”
“I’ve always liked you, Azul. I’d never lie about that. Your birthday gift—those are my honest opinions.”
“Every one of them?”
“Each and every one.”
He sniffles weakly, drying his eyes with the heel of his palm.
Instinctively, you reach for your camera. And then you hesitate. You’ve always stood behind the protective lens of your trusty Ghost Camera, assuming the role of photographer in order to remain in his orbit. But now you’d like to try putting the camera aside and documenting Azul’s moments with your own two eyes.
He loves me.
You just manage to shut the front door before you’re pulling him flush against you. He presses you up against the wall in the foyer, a knee slotting between your legs. You melt in mutual merriment, grabbing at every part of him. Your uniform blouse is ripped open in a hurry. You try to handle his graduation robes with caution, appreciating expensive embroidery, but vehemence gets the better of you. It’s a wild rush. Hot and panting, you’re shuddering in carnal delight, every nerve alight. When he presses up against you next, half-dressed and hazy with an addictive adoration, you can feel the result of your exploratory touches straining for release.
“Upstairs,” you mumble against his mouth, sweating out of your skin.
You fall into bed as one, tangled around each other. Azul trails kisses up the expanse of your stomach, working you open on skillful fingers. You shiver beneath him, your heart pounding in your ribs.
“I love you.” A kiss to your belly.
“I love you.” A kiss to the valley of your breasts.
“I love you.” A kiss to your lips.
You love him just as intensely. 
He drags his fingers out next, admiring the slick coating them like it’s a valuable substance. You giggle, dizzy with delirium.
“Can I call you mine?”
You run your hands up and down his arms. “I’d like that.”
“Your boyfriend,” he murmurs, astonished. “I’m your boyfriend…”
“Mhm…” You sit up in bed and climb into his lap. Slowly, inch by inch, you lower yourself. He sucks in a breath through grit teeth. “And I’m—mmh—I’m your girlfriend.”
Azul whines into your mouth. His arms wrap around you to keep you firmly pinned to his body, and he bucks his hips up to meet you the rest of the way. Filled in such a way, connected so intimately, you breathe a satisfied sigh. You dig your nails into his shoulders. Every muscle slackens. It’s bliss, pure and perfect. The both of you mold to one another like sea meeting shore.
You grind down, chasing a mounting climax. “You’re the best—perfect. So perfect. Oh, I love you, Azul. I love you so much. I’ve always wanted to say it.”
He presses his forehead to yours. “You have no idea how fervently I’ve yearned for this—for you.”
You can’t possibly begin to imagine, but you can definitely relate. Weeks of silent pining, of hoping something might happen and you’d be able to confess without fear. Those days are behind you. Now you can know love in his arms and it isn’t so uncertain.
You lose yourselves in the sensations of sweet, soulful sex. He’s gentle like a spring breeze, dedicated like a devotee at your altar. You’re much the same, your moans just as plentiful. Just as loud. You’re wrapped in wonder when you look into his eyes and find the same amount of love reflected back.
I’m so happy I met you.
When he cums, he digs his fingers into your hips to drag you down and bury himself deeper inside. You unravel shortly after, your orgasm coaxed out by a few attentive massages to your clit. Your bodies, sticky and sweaty, stay connected even after you’ve come down from the clouds.
“Had I known, I would’ve said something sooner.” After catching his breath, Azul rests his head in the crook of your neck. “I regret it.”
“I don’t. Things happen when they happen.” You run your fingers through the tangled, silvery strands of his hair. It’s soft just like him. He leans into your touch and hums appreciatively. “I’m glad it happened when it did.”
“I’m glad I could say it. It would’ve eaten me alive if I’d left without telling you.”
“And are you still afraid?”
Azul places his hand over yours. “No, not anymore. The world ahead looks much clearer now.”
“Am I in it?”
He laughs. “More than that.”
“Oh?”
“You are my world.”
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twisted-writing · 4 months
Text
To the point of exhaustion (part 2)
——————————————————————
For @naroshinozaki
Who asked: Could you please do the fainting trope, but with the vicedorm leaders?
Have a nice day and take care of yourself!!!
( ↀДↀ)✧
———————————————————
POV: Third Person
Characters: Vice dorm leaders, Dire Crowley (mentioned), gender neutral!reader
Pairing: Vice dorm leaders x gender neutral!reader (separate)
Warnings: angst, mentions of being overworked, fainting, lack of sleep, Dire Crowley slander
Note: For this I’ve decided to exclude Ortho.
Word Count: 979
—————————————————————
It was yet another unbirthday party in Heartslabyul and Trey Clover, the dorm’s vice dorm leader would normally be enjoying the celebration with everyone else in the dorm but instead, he was in his bedroom cuddling with y/n.
“I’m sorry that you’re missing the unbirthday party because of me, Trey.”
“Don’t worry, there will be plenty more of them.” He assured them in a soft tone. “You just focus on getting the rest you need.”
They had confessed that they hadn’t been getting as much sleep, due to the headmaster and the way he piled more and more onto their plate and how overwhelming it was for them and how close they were to burning out.
And how all they wanted was just to sleep. Even if it was just for a few minutes.
And Trey had decided to give them that.
It was clear that the headmaster certainly wouldn’t.
“Don’t worry, Riddle assured that he’ll make sure that there’s something for us when you wake up.”
“Thank you, Trey. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
——————————————————
“…Ruggie?”
“Finally awake, sleeping beauty?”
“Yeah. What time is it?”
Ruggie checked his phone briefly for the time. “It’s four p.m.”
“You let me sleep all day?!”
“Yes. You could hardly stand. You needed the rest.”
“But what about the lessons? The assignments I missed?”
“You can borrow my notes. As for the assignments, you don’t have to worry, Crewel and Trein will let you make them up.”
“But the headmaster…”
“He had to go one day without his free therapist. The world has come to an end.” Ruggie’s voice was dripping with sarcasm. “He’ll live. I care more about you and your health and I know that you would be hungry when you woke up.” As if on cue, y/n’s stomach growled and Ruggie handed them the food he had come back with from the cafeteria. “The ghosts were more than happy to make this for you. Your favorite.”
The hyena felt his cheeks turn pink when suddenly kissed his lips. “What was that for?”
“That was thank you, for being the best boyfriend ever.”
“Yeah, well, I love you.”
“Love you more, Ruggie.”
————————————————————
“Are you feeling better, my pearl?”
“Yes, I am, Jade.” It was currently after hours in the Mostro Lounge, the smooth jazz was playing softly and with the ambiance of the Lounge, it created the perfect atmosphere for y/n to relax. Especially after the week they had, no one deserved it more than them. “Thank you.”
When his pearl had arrived at the lounge, looking quite dead on their feet, as if they would faint at any moment, Jade wasted no time in leading y/n to their favorite seat in the lounge, he had gently coaxed the reason why they were so exhausted.
The headmaster, it seemed, did not know the meaning of restraint.
Jade would not hesitate to remind him.
“Of course.” He gave y/n one of his rare smiles, not the kind of smile that was used to intimidate, but the kind that gave him a softer appearance. “I would do anything for you.”
He would let Azul deal with that.
———————————————————————
“Thanks for letting me hide out in Scarabia, Jamil, and for letting me borrow your hoodie. I just needed some peace and quiet for once, you know?”
Out of everyone, Jamil knew what it was like to feel overwhelmed and under pressure. Being the vice dorm leader of Scarabia and having to watch over Kalim was not an easy thing. “Yeah, I get it. Trust me.” At least with Kalim, he allowed Jamil some time to himself and let him do things that would let him unwind.
Unlike the headmaster.
It was why y/n had made their way to Scarabia.
And it was during one of the rare times where Scarabia wasn’t having a party so they could spend time with Jamil, at Kalim’s assurance that everything was fine, and that today was a relaxation for everyone in the dorm anyway.
And if anyone needed to relax the most, it was y/n and Jamil.
“Don’t worry. We can just be lazy and not have to worry about anything.”
————————————————————
Underneath the big tree in the woods behind Night Raven College, on a picnic blanket, y/n and Rook sat together, enjoying the breeze, the shade from the tree, and the occasional chirp from the birds as they flew overhead.
“How are you feeling, mon cher? Better?”
“Yes, I’m feeling better, Rook. Thank you. I really appreciate that you set this up for me.”
The vice dorm leader of Pomefiore kissed y/n’s hair. “Your health and safety matters most to me.”
“Vil doesn’t need you for anything?”
“Roi du Poison told me that we can take all the time we need. And I plan to spend the entire day spoiling you.”
Rook’s smile widened when y/n’s giggled reached his ears.
——————————————————————————
Father, will y/n be all right?”
In Diasmonia’s lounge, y/n slept peacefully on the couch with the fire going in the fireplace. “Of course, Silver.” His smile was tight. “They’ll be fine.”
“The headmaster overworked them too much. Do you think he knows? Or that he just doesn’t care?”
Lilia was sure that it was both. “I’ll deal with him later. Right now, I’m going to make sure that y/n recovers.”
“You really love them, father.”
“With everything that I am.”
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mochinomnoms · 4 months
Note
Imagine your boyfriend(s) confess that they have a breeding kink and you stare at them in silence and he is thinking that he fucked up, then you respond "Seriously, in this economy?" yeah I wonder how that would go
-Vaquita
In their defense, if we're talking about like 90% of NRC, they are loaded or fairly well-off so like….fuck the economy let them fuck and knock you up instead!
The remaining like 10% (Which is like Ruggie, Deuce, Jamil, and Epel…maaaybe Jack?) are probably like “Okay, fair.”
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hisui-dreamer · 4 months
Note
Hihi Rinna! Saw the cool event and I would like to request a bouquet ⁠\⁠(⁠・⁠◡⁠・⁠)⁠/ daffodils, rhododendrons and a few cherry blossoms, please send it to Lilia, Jamil and Jade!
everlasting mementos
Characters: Lilia, Jamil and Jade
Synopsis: you've left twisted wonderland, leaving behind a simple bouquet of flowers for him as a parting gift
Tags: heavy angst (disco wants suffering y'all), no happy endings, bad vibes all around, farewells
Word count: 976
Notes: hooboy this one was depressing ヘ⁠(⁠。⁠□⁠°⁠)⁠ヘ hope you enjoy the pain!!
Masterlist
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flowers of choice:
daffodils: please don't forget me
rhododendrons: red ones symbolise tremendous grief
cherry blossoms: scattering, fleeting moments
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Lilia casts a spell on your flowers to make them everlasting, keeping them by his bedside table his gaze is always drawn to it every time he walks into his room, and he’s reminded of all the memories you’ve shared together
he’s become used to saying farewells, having gone through the pain of losing his dearest friends and countless comrades in the war
he’s long learned that life will always move on, and whether or not you move along with it isn't a choice you get to choose
tries to act as normal, but everyone can tell he’s not energetic as usual
silver and malleus offer to spend more time with him so he won’t feel too lonely, and sebek even watches his mouth to not accidentally upset him
he’s incredibly grateful to everyone for being so considerate, but there’s no stopping the dull ache in his heart
every time he’s in the kitchen, he hears your panicking voice echoing in his ears, scolding him for another misdemeanour
or your squeals of surprise when he pops down from the ceiling to give you a kiss
you've really left a mark on this old fae...
Lilia tenderly caressed the flowers, tears welled in his eyes, tracing silent paths down his cheeks. He knew his time with you was limited, that you would always go back to your world and never return. He knew that nothing would last forever, but he just hoped he could have spent a little more time without you.
"How foolish am I...," he murmured softly, his voice tinged with sorrow. "To dare to hope for a different ending. One without goodbyes."
Amidst the flickering candlelight, he found himself enveloped in memories of your presence. "The world feels so much dimmer without you," he confessed, his words laden with longing and regret.
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Jamil wanted to throw out the flowers but he couldn't bear parting with the last thing you left behind for him
he ends up turning them into pressed flowers, making a tiny pendant with them so he can keep you close always
Jamil, like he's done most of his life, decides to bottle up his feelings and go about his day as usual
but everyone in scarabia can tell he's snappier and a lot more tense than usual
even kalim, who's been trying his best not to upset or trouble jamil
on late nights, when he's all alone with his thoughts, he pulls up your old voice recordings, unable to fight the urge to hear your voice
he replays them tirelessly until every sentence is etched into his memory
the comfort they once provided now only serves to amplify his frustration, a mere reminder of your absence
he had resigned himself to a life in the shadows, but then you came into his life and for the first time in forever he let himself hope for a brighter future but now...
he wants to be mad at you for giving him this false hope, but he can't even stand the thought of being mad at you, he's just mad that he let himself hope again
still, he doesn't regret a single second he spent with you
The sound of your voice from the recording dwindled into the hushed night, and with it, the floodgates of his emotions burst open, and he collapsed onto the floor, tears streaming down his face.
"It's not enough," he whispered between sobs, clutching the device tightly in his trembling hands. "Just hearing your voice... it's not enough."
He yearned to see your smile, to feel your warmth beside him once again. "You gave me so much hope," he choked out, his voice breaking with emotion. "That maybe, just maybe, we could have been happy."
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Jade keeps the bouquet of flowers you gave him, propagating them so they'll always thrive by his side, making sure to care for them so he'll always have the last gift you give him
each time he tends to them, he talks to them as if they're you, telling them about his day, what shenanigans floyd has gotten into, how well his mushrooms have been growing...
he never leaves without wishing for your happiness, because that thought eases the ache in his heart slightly
on the outside, he acts unaffected and you really wouldn't be able to tell he's upset at all
but floyd and azul can tell, it's clear as day to them just how devastated he is
azul lets him have more free time, cutting his shifts shorter so he can go on hikes or take care of his terrariums, any activities to cheer him up
but even those activities fail to lighten his mood, because he's constantly reminded of his memories with you
him taking care of your wound after you'd tripped and injured your knee, you excited to show him the new mushroom dish you've been working on, the subtle stares and smiles the two of you exchanged at school...
there are traces of you littering every corner of his heart...
As Jade passed by a familiar hiking spot, the very place where countless moments were shared between the two of you, bittersweet memories flooded his mind. He sank to his knees, tears streaming down his cheeks as he struggled to catch his breath.
How was it possible that you were only in his life for a short period, yet your absence felt unbearable? How had you managed to leave such a profound impact on him, with every little thing now serving as a painful reminder of your absence?
"I just... wish to see you again..." he whispered to the empty trail, his voice choked with sorrow. "What can I do... to make this feeling go away?"
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