#Frasier quotes

[heatherthehippiex]

An assortment of favourites.

[bens-moms-are-lesbinems]

jim: sebastian… at Cornell University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope. now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe.

seb: okay…

jim: sebastian, if i were using that microscope right now, i still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem.

[beeesworld]

(Sigh) I just wish we could have a relationship where... where neither one of us is the man.

Frasier

[golyadkin]

you can trust them, they're super scientists

[harveywritings92]

[R/n and Horangi are riding the elevator when a lady walks in.]

R/n, nervously: Someone followed me again last night.

Horangi: Ah, you're just being paranoid.

R/n: I'm telling you they're on to me.

Horangi: Come on. Nobody could recognize you after all that plastic surgery.

[the woman on the elevator with them becomes alarmed at this] 

R/n: That's what Marlena thought.

Horangi : Marlena got sloppy. She never should have gone back to Zurich.

R/n: I just don't want any more bloodshed.

Horangi: Relax. You're home free.

R/n: You don't know the Woodchuck and his ways...

[the elevator doors open and the woman rushes out in fear. Horangi and R/n start laughing]

R/n : Oh, we're terrible!

Horangi: We are? You are! "The Woodchuck and his ways"?

R/n: You know, we really should stop doing this. It's not nice.

Horangi : Ah, you're right. We won't do it anymore.

[The elevator doors open and a man steps on.]

Horangi: How'd you get the stuff through customs?

R/n: Oh, they never check the fake tits...

[The man glances nervously over his shoulder.]

[comingupforblair]

Wednesday: Enid will be in San Francisco this weekend.

Yoko: And what are your plans?

Wednesday: I thought I'd sit alone in my cavernous apartment, rocking back and forth while hugging my knees.

[columboscreens]

[hoarder-of-dragons]

Gwaine: When are you going to agree that you and the princess are together Merlin: I don't need to. I mean, it's obvious. We are just friends. He is not courting me. Gwaine: Is that a new neckerchief? Merlin: So what if it is!

[harmonizingsunsets]

Castiel: I thought you liked Meg!

Dean: I do. I like her from a distance. You know, the way you like the sun. Meg is like the sun . . . except without the warmth.

[marksandrec]

Marks and Rec: Misc #2581

The thought is implied. (Dialogue from Frasier.)

[justletmeon12]

Vox: You know, you're jealous. You're jealous that I'm having sex! Jealous that I'm having hot, passionate, sweaty jungle sex! What are you having?

Alastor [to the waitress behind Vox]: I'm having a latte.

[heatherthehippiex]

Frasier quotes I use on the daily. He’s a whole mood.

[zetadraconis11]

HL Incorrect Quote #69

MC: Come on, Ominis. Talk to me, use your words.

Ominis: It's just so egregious.

MC:

MC: Smaller words.

[youroriginalsublimecupcakestuff]

Jason to Tim : "Speaking of folks i can do without , damian is back"

Tim : " That's explain why blood was pouring from all my faucets this morning."

[incorrect-losers]

Stan: Alright, now, everyone pay attention. I have an announcement to make and I only have a minute

Eddie: Why? Are you in a hurry?

Stan: No, I was referring to your relatively short attention spans

[incorrectbatfam]

Bruce: What the hell was that? Was that a gunshot?

Damian: Morning, Father. Just getting up?

Bruce: "Just getting up?" Are you out of your mind? A gun just went off in here!

Tim: Jason bought Damian a starter pistol.

Jason: And there's no need to get snippy. Accidents happen, you know.

Bruce: Oh, I'm sorry. Was I snippy? I didn't realize it was too much to ask that there not be gunplay in my manor!