#big tuna cutting

[lolly-dolli]

Here's what you're gonna do.

You're gonna go down to your local Aldi's, buy a 24oz bag of frozen mango chunks, a bag of rice, and two cans of black beans.

If you don't already have them; salt, lime or lemon juice and cumin; maybe some meal prep tupperware. Pouch tuna if you like that stuff.

Once home, put that bag of mango chunks in a bowl full of warm water so they defrost. Don't pen it. The bag needs to stay closed. This'll make sense later.

Prepare enough water in a pot to cook two cups of that rice. Make sure the pot's big. Big enough to hold way more rice than you expect there to be. Add a teaspoon of cumin, two tablespoons lime or lemon juice, salt according to preference. Pat of butter.

Boil. Make sure the butler's melted. Stir to combine.

Add your rice. Cook according to rice bag.

If you have a protein, you can cook that now. 20-30 minutes at your disposal. If not, that's why we got the second can of beans for.

I recommend Aldi's tuna steaks - quick to defrost, 5 bucks for 2-3. Lean protein. Real nice. Creme de la crumb's tuna marinade also works real nice if you have the energy.

A pouch of tuna's just as good functionally.

Less mercury that way.

You can mix it in that if you want, too.

Strain your beans. Conserve a little bean water for the rice if you want.

Your rice is done.

Add your beans. Twice as many if you're feeling like it'll be a bad week. Two or three pouch tunas too if you want a little extra.

If you have the lemon pepper kind you can probably nix the citrus juice.

Now we go back to your mango. If all's worked correctly, the warm water should've thawed them somewhat, the heat warming the air in the bag.

Dump 'em in, turn the burner to low heat. Stir until well combined.

Portion out into Tupperware.

You've got a good couple meals right there. Even more as side dishes if you have the energy to cook chicken nuggets or fish or veggies or whatever.

Lunch. Breakfast. Dinner.

Carbs to keep you awake and moving.

Protein to fuel your muscles.

Bit of fiber to push it all through your guts easier.

Citric acid to avoid the scurvy.

Can be eaten hot or cold, and the shit's good, too.

You're gonna have something tasty to eat whether you can operate a microwave or not this week.

That's what you're gonna do.

[imgae-insertshockedgasps-16]

okay i've seen a few Just Some Guy!danny aus and they've consumed my brain so here you go, it's under the cut, you're welcome and thank you (ps it also combines part of a prompty type thing i saw the other day, props if you know it)

Danny was not entirely sure how he got here.

He was just walking along, bopping to some great interdimensional tunes, eating his tuna fish sandwich - with ectoplasm and pickles, of course - when KABLOW there's this big ole tightie-whities-on-the-outside wearing guy.

Now, Danny's not great at keeping up with the times, but he's pretty sure this is that Superman dude.

Said SuperDude was staring at his headphones and making vague "hey take them out pls so can converse" gestures, so naturally Danny pops the Interdimensional Walkman out of his chest to pause his wicked music, and then puts the whole kit and kaboodle back behind his rib cage.

"What's up? Did you need help or something? I mean, I'm pretty solidly retired but I guess if it's super important I can-"

SuperGuy abruptly stopped staring and started speaking, "Uh- no, no, thank you. Although I'm sure you could be helpful if I did need you! But, ah, well, was that a Walkman?"

Ohhhhh, Danny totally gets it now.

"Oh, dude, I gotchu. You want me to hook you up, right? Don't even worry about it, I know a guy who'll give you one a these babies for free! You're Kryptonian, right? Yeah, I totally get it, you wanna listen to some music from your home planet, no problemo my newly-minted friend, give me, like, ten seconds-"

And so Danny tore open a neat little portal and stuck his head through it, asking Technus to pretty please give him another Interdimensional Walkman, no he didn't even break this one-! He ran into a Kryptonian who heard him rockin out and wanted to know where he got the beats, and he'd told them that he could hook them up! C'mon Technus, you can't let them down! They're all lonely! They want to learn about their culture!

-----------------------------------------

Clark has no idea what's happening.

He had been searching for this ear-splitting, headache-inducing noise, and had come across a guy dancing down the sidewalk.

Not unusual, right?

Except that the terrible noise was coming from this man's - kid's?? He can't quite tell how old he is - headphones!

Of course, he didn't want to be rude, so he politely gestured for the man to remove the headphones. The man then proceeded to reach into his chest and pull out some kind of - Walkman?? Do people still use Walkmans?

Clark was naturally concerned, so he activated a spot of x-ray vision, just to see what's going on in there, and was promptly horrified.

This man was using his chest cavity as a storage compartment!

Two wallets, a key ring, a lunch box, some sort of odd thermos, bits and bobs of random parts and tools were all tangled around - and occasionally in - this guy's organs!

Suddenly, Clark realized that he'd been staring for a while, and the man was now talking. Something about coming out of retirement to help, oh dear, Ma would knock him around the head if he kept being so rude, "Uh- no, no, thank you. Although I'm sure you could be helpful if I did need you! But, ah, well, was that a Walkman?"

And now he was speaking rapidly, something about music from Krypton? Clark's pretty sure that not a whole lot survived the explosion, and he'd be pretty surprised if this guy just happened to have-

A vaguely Lazarus colored portal??

What in the world-

-----------------------------------------

"Thanks Technus! You're the best! I owe you one non evil scheme related favour!"

Danny zips up the portal and turns around, fiddling with the tapes and Walkman in his hands as he goes.

"Here you go! I wasn't entirely sure what genre you'd want, I don't really listen to a whole lot of Kryptonian stuff to be honest, it's usually too heavy on the vocal for me- not that vocals aren't great! But I want a whole band experience, yaknow? I'm not really looking for individual singers. Anyway, I just had him go for a couple songs of each major genre, but if you want something different you can totally-"

"Wait, hold on, you're telling me that there's Kryptonian music on those tapes? Playable by that Walkman?"

"Uh, well, yeah. Isn't that why you tracked me down? And, technically, I mean, they're ectoplasmic tapes and an Interdimensional Walkman, so. Hey, did you know that kryptonite is actually super-condensed ectoplasm? And since it's filled with the anguish and suffering and fear and whatnot of your entire home planet dying, it only negatively affects your species! Pretty cool right? Oh, shit, was that insensitive, I really didn't mean to be, I just thought that maybe you'd want to- ACK!"

Danny was not expecting SuperMuscles to get so close. He thrust out the IW and tapes and dropped them into SuperFellow's hands, "Listen, I gotta run. I'm supposed to be at a o-chem study group right now and they're totally gonna be pissed. Hit me up if you want a different tape."

And the proceeded to run in the opposite direction, duck into an alley and turn invisible, and fly over to the cafe his study group was in.

"Listen, I know I'm late but you'll never believe why-"

[dotster001]

For Tuna; Snack Break

Summary: A series of vignettes taking place while Grim is making his final choice. The time will soon arrive....

Part One Part Two Choose your ending....

"I have detention everyday for three weeks," Grim pouted as you gave him his tuna pancake breakfast.

"What did you do this time?"

"I-" he cut himself off, his eyes nervously flicking to yours, then back to his plate.

"Crowley's an ass that's why. No other reasons, don't dig into it henchhuman."

"Am I going to get a bill for it?"

"No."

"Then I don't have the energy to care," you said with a sigh, thinking of all the maintenance you had to do on Ramshackle today.

Grim looked at the time, shoved what was left of his pancake into his mouth, then scampered out the door, passing Ruggie on his way out.

"Hey Y/N, I found  a tool kit, ready to do some fixing?"

You nodded, ready to renovate Ramshackle with your favorite hyena for a couple hours.

….

Grim stepped into the mirror chamber, and made sure to use his toe beans as much as possible. He silently made his way to the headmage's mirror. He had almost made it when he was scooped up, and squeezed firmly in a pair of strong arms.

"Thought you could hide from me forever, didn't you sealio?" Floyd said in a growl.

He brought Grim up to face level, a nasty scowl on his face.

"Let's see if this jogs your memory. I gave you a month's worth of free lobsters. In exchange, you promised I would make it through to the second wave of interviews. Starting to sound familiar?"

Grim quickly nodded.

"Cool, then why did I have to find out from Jade I wasn't chosen to participate, and Azul was?"

Grim whimpered.

"I warned you, right? People who cross my family have a tendency to disappear. It won't be today, it won't be tomorrow, but watch your back, cause one day I'll have Y/N, and you'll-"

"Mister Leech. Unless you want to join Grim in detention, please let him go," Crowley said, crossing his arms in a pout.

"Sounds boring," Floyd pouted, dropping Grim like a hot iron. Unfortunately for Riddle, he happened to choose that moment to step through the Heartslaybul portal.

"Oh! Goldfishie! Let's play tag!"

And now Floyd was running after Riddle, who was practically begging the headmage to save him.

But the headmage conveniently couldn't hear as he escorted Grim to detention.

….

"Idia-"

"Shit! How did you get in here?" Idia screamed at Silver who was patiently sitting on his bed waiting for him.

"I let him in!" Ortho said excitedly. "It is better for your mental health to have friends!"

Idia fought back a glare, before pulling out his iPad, and hastily typing.

"Why are you here?"

"My father said you could answer a question I had. What is "babygirl"?"

Idia stared at Silver for a moment as the tips of his hair slightly flickered pink.

"Damn. I have to choose between the otaku urge to participate in an irl otome cut scene, and my love of Y/N, the greatest character to ever spawn in my save file."

He chewed his lip, and Silver continued sitting patiently.

"Fuck it, this is too epic to pass up. Babygirl means Y/N thinks you're just a little guy."

"I still don't understand."

Idia groaned.

"Um, okay, so Y/N thinks you're a total cutie and would be happy to have you on their arm as a trophy husband."

Silver's cheeks turned a light pink.

"Oh…"

"Like, they prob. think you're submissive and-"

"Babygirl is like a princess! You're Y/N's princess!" Ortho cut in excitedly.

"I'm Y/N's princess…" Silver whispered, a slight smile on his face.

"Not exactly! It means Y/N wouldn't mind if you were their princess. Nothing is set in stone. I have a lot of bbg's, but I wouldn't necessarily settle down with any of them."

"I like the idea of being Y/N's princess…"

"Damn it, why am I rooting for this? It's too cute!" Idia groaned. 

"Hee hee, big brother also wants to be Y/N's princess…"

Idia's hair turned a bright red and he went catatonic.

….

"So that's why you booked out the kitchen this morning."

Ace stiffened, and turned from the Ramshackle door to "greet" Trey. He was startled to see Trey holding a tart.

"I had the kitchen all morning! When did you make that?" Ace asked in horror and despair.

Trey shrugged. "I always have a spare tart lying around, in case we have company. What's under the tin?" He nodded towards the dessert tin Ace was holding.

"My masterpiece," Ace grinned. The grin quickly fell. "Wait! Why are you here? You stole my idea!"

"The idea to bring food to a hungry prefect at lunchtime? While it's such an original idea for you to have, I didn't steal it from you," Trey sighed in irritation, attempting to step around Ace to the door. Ace blocked him.

"No. I was here first. I get to give Y/N treats."

"Ace, I beg you to reconsider."

"No!" Ace got in a defensive position that he used when playing basketball, then swatted the tart out of Trey's hands.

"What the hell!"

"There. I'm the only one with treats. As the Seven intended." Ace turned the door knob, but Trey started shoving him, and reaching for the door knob himself.

"I tried to be nice, but you've completely blown it."

"It's not nice to steal someone's idea!"

"It is literally 12:30. Everyone is eating right now. It's not an original idea!"

In the midst of the shoving back and forth, the door opened, revealing a very amused Ruggie.

"Shihihi, you both just saved me a trip."

He snatched the dessert tray and shut the door behind him. Both men froze in shock, and heard Ruggie yell,

"Y/N! I got us a treat!"

Ace elbowed Trey.

"Nice going, dumbass."

Trey raised an eyebrow and stared at Ace, who only at that moment remembered who he was talking to.

"I mean, that sucked, didn't it, Mister Vice Housewarden, sir?" He laughed nervously.

"Don't worry too much about it. I doodle suited it when he took it from you. Whatever it was will taste like sardines."

Trey walked away calmly as Ace stared in mixed awe and horror.

….

You and Kalim were walking to class together, when you noticed some scribbles on his hand.

"What's that?" You asked.

"Oh! It's a new thing I'm trying. You know how I'm trying to be more independent from Jamil, but I have a terrible memory? I'm just writing everything on my hand and arm!"

"Can you even read that? It looks all smudged!"

"Sure I can!" Kalim pulled up his sleeve, pointing to each word as he read aloud.

"Party, present, Grim, books, botany, secret, and snack."

"How is that helpful? What does any of that even mean?"

"Well party is, I'm throwing a party soon. Or I want to. Present and Grim, is because I want to give Grim a present at the party, because I heard he really likes presents. Books is so that I don't forget my textbooks, botany is because I have botany in an hour, and snack is because I'm hungry and might forget to eat!"

"Wow, okay, I guess that does help. But what is "secret" supposed to mean?"

"Oh! Right! Thanks for reminding me!" Kalim smiled happily. "There's something Jamil and I know that I'm not supposed to tell you."

"Oh?" Your curiosity definitely peaked. "And what aren't you supposed to tell me?"

"Let me double check," Kalim looked at his arm smudges, before gasping and laughing. "Nice try, it's a secret!" He said, pointing to secret on his arm.

You gave your best attempt at a flirty pout. "Couldn't you just tell me? I won't tell Jamil you told me. It can be our secret."

Kalim tilted his head thoughtfully, before nodding.

"Okay! So Grim has been-"

In moments, Jamil had body slammed Kalim to the ground.

"Kalim! I'm so sorry, I thought I saw an attacker."

"It's okay! It was an honest mistake,"Kalim smiled despite groaning in pain.

"We should go back to your room, just in case," Jamil said firmly, yanking Kalim to his feet, and away from you.

Jamil then turned to Kalim. "How many times do I have to explain this? You're lucky Grim is still even considering you, since you failed to show up to the interview. But you'll completely blow it if you tell Y/N! You'll never get another chance at Grim choosing you!"

"Right, I'm so sorry, I forgot," Kalim facepalmed. "Thanks for stopping me back there, Jamil."

"Anytime," Jamil smiled sweetly, "After all, I just want what's best for you."

….

Deep in the recesses of the Octavinelle Dorm, two random Octavinelle students are expressing their distaste…

"It's not fair! I'm Prince Rielle's first cousin! And Y/N's lab partner in Alchemy! We've actually gone on a date! Where does that cat monster get off not even considering me?"

"You think you got it bad?" The other student was tying his bow tie in the mirror, his anger evident on his face. "Y/N and I are in the newspaper club together. And I was about to ask them to be my significant other, when Grim showed up out of nowhere and told Y/N he "desperately needed their help with something." It's pathetic! The whole reason he chose us to sit in for those two other bachelors is because he knew how upset we were!"

"Absolutely disgusting. You know what?" The first student stood up. "The rat is in detention more often than not. He can't stop me from asking Y/N out!" 

"Me too!" The other student stood up as well, before giving a flirty smirk to his roommate. "This is going to be our best anniversary yet."

"Agreed," they grabbed each other's hands and opened the door, both startled to see Jade standing there with an eerie smile.

"Excellent timing. You both need to work an emergency shift in the lounge."

"Damn it"

"Fuck."

….

"Monsieur Fuzzball! I have arrived with a new batch of conditioner specially formulated for your luxurious fur!"

"Much obliged," Grim smirked as he took the goodie bag from Rook.

"And I have Roi du posion and my financial statements, as requested," he handed Grim a manila envelope.

"Thanks, I'll let you know once I've looked over everybody's."

Grim moved to leave, but Rook picked him up by the scruff of his neck.

"I would like to make something clear though. I am le chasseur d'amour.  I will hunt after the love of my life, whether I have your blessing or not," his eyes glittered with unbridled glee. "And should anyone stand in my way, I care not who they are. I shall act in a way that I see as fitting."

Grim's fur prickled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Rook laughed lightly. "Who's to say?"

He pressed a kiss to the top of Grim's head, then set him down.

"Sleep well, Monsieur Fuzzball!"

And with a flourish he left Grim alone.

….

Jack, Epel, and Deuce were on a run together. As they rounded a bend, they came up on Leona taking a nap.

"Housewarden," Jack greeted.

Leona opened a single eye, and groaned.

"You three look remarkably calm for people whose best friend is set to be betrothed soon."

All three of them stiffened.

Jack rubbed his hand on the back of his neck and looked off into the distance.

"Y/N doesn't care about money. Whoever Grim picks, I have no doubt that Y/N will turn down the relationship, unless they truly see a future with them, in which case, what will be will be."

Deuce bit his lip. "I'm not in the place for a relationship anyway…I want to get my degree and start my career before I try to support someone else."

"It's just dumb as hell, and Y/N's not gonna put up with it. And when it all comes to light, they'll turn to the only people who don't see them as an object to be purchased. An' I'll be there to scoop them into my arms and pick up the pieces," Epel said with a smirk.

Deuce and Jack stared at him.

"Oh please. You both were thinkin' it. I'm just the only one brave enough to say it!"

Leona smirked. "Well I hope that works out for you boys. Just know you won't even get the chance if I'm the one chosen. I know how to treat Y/N right."

He lounged back with a triumphant smile, and quickly fell back asleep, leaving the boys with torn expressions.

….

"Your majesty! It is always an honor for the queen of Pomefiore to pay us a visit. How many I be of service?" Azul asked Vil, who was gracefully seated in the chair across from his desk in the VIP room.

"I have already drawn up the contract, it just requires your signature," Vil hummed, pulling out a scroll that already had his signature on it.

"Simply put, I am asking you to step down from the running for Y/N's future husband, and to clear the way for my victory. You will notice," Vil pointed to a blank space in the contract, "the payment spot is blank. Upon completion of the contract you are able to fill in whatever you want."

"Whatever I want?"

"Money, product, fame, anything you can think of is yours."

Azul thoughtfully tapped his chin.

"I could have Vil Schoenheit as an unpaid spokesperson for my future restaurant chain for an undisclosed amount of time. The capital that would bring in would be unmatched."

Azul picked up the contract, and Vil smirked. Until Azul tore it into pieces.

"The name of the game is confidence, and insecurity is not a good look on you, my queen."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Vil snapped.

"You think I haven't noticed the fact that your hair is half a shade darker since that monster told you you might grow old?"

"You've misseen it, I assure you. My hair has always been this shade of blond," Vil hissed.

"It's very possible I have misseen," Azul pushed his glasses up his nose triumphantly, "but it would be impossible to "missee" the fact that we have had to up production on your facial moisturizer, because you are using it in higher quantities."

"I am not, I'm just stocking up!" Vil slammed the table as he stood.

"Let's face it, Schoenheit, I know what it looks like when someone has lost. One of us here has crumbled under the pressure, and I'll give you a hint. It's not me."

Vil glared at Azul heatedly, before turning on his heels and leaving the VIP room, slamming the door on his way out.

….

You had been reading a book on the couch, while Grim sorted through some papers. You were hoping, in your heart of hearts, that he was studying or doing his homework. Deep down, you knew that wasn't the case.

After some final rustling of papers, Grim said, "Alright, I've made my choice."

"For what?"

"Nothing, mwahahahahaha!" 

"Then why are you-"

"No reason!" He shouted. Then below his breath you heard, "mwahahaha…"

You sighed heavily.

"Am I going to get a bill for it?"

"No."

"Then I don't care."

Below his breath, he released another, "mwahahaha…"

....

Tag list-@shytastemakerthing @stygianoir @leonia0 @lleoll @eccedentesiast-sapphic @supertmntgirl @cxsmicdustdreams @aethermostbeloved @krystalkiller25 @asmallbean3 @theneurodivergentdummy @candlewitch-cryptic @smilingfox22-blog @phantomgaming1920 @the-dumber-scaramouche @a-small-tyrant @noidonothavetimeforthis @bontensbabygirl

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

iconic moments from the octa and savana manga updates

***Manga spoilers below the cut!!***

So... uh... Leona sleeping shirtless (and in jeans???) is canon? (Leona is taking off and tossing his clothes to Yuuta and Grim in the first image, Ruggie's dragging Leona out of bed in the second image.) Or is that a creative liberty on the mangaka's part?? 😂

If you look to the bottom right of the first image, there's makeshift bedding for Yuuta and Grim~

STAN RAGI HE'S SO CUTE TTATT LOOK AT HIS CHEEKY LIL SMILE... And his fangies...

AIYFLIYOFAIYOFAIAFBAD NOT AZUL MAKING THE MOST OUT OF POCKET FACIAL EXPRESSIONS. . . . .. .... . ....... .. . . ... . . . . Between this chapter and the last, he's got enough sass to power the entire school...

There's a panel where we get a glimpse of Azul's socks, which matches the pattern that Floyd wears in his own Dorm Uniform. These must just be the default socks as part of their Dorm Uniform... It's very weird to think of Jade in these too😭

adbihlbvfvoyqevpbf I love how the manga shows Floyd leaning on Azul and Jade so often; it really helps to characterize Floyd as much more lax than the other two. It also paints Floyd as comfortable with getting up close and personal, especially with people he is familiar with.

MEANWHILE LOOK AT LEONA... WHAT'S WITH THOSE FACES HE'S SO DISGUSTED IN THE FIRST AND PRETTILY PISSED IN THE SECOND... (First is from the Episode of Octavinelle, second is from the Episode of Savanaclaw; you can really take note of the stylistic differences between the two mangaka here.)

Maybe she's born with it, it's Maybelline... asdgvaosdvavdasb The Episode of Savanaclaw artist is so extra when it comes to Leona's hair, it's very reminiscent of shoujo manga www

... I know Yuuta and Grim are being kicked out of house and home but 1) GRIM LOOKS SO CUTE CLUTCHING ONTO HIS TUNA CANS, 2) Yuuta looks adorable too, look at the leek sticking out... and 3) damn, I wish the twins would loom menacingly over me too

Yuuta has been my favorite manga!Yuu so far 😭 Boy's not only kind but his own skills to help him out of a pinch without getting violent or fighting... He convinces Leona to let him sleep over at Savanaclaw dorm by cooking Leona food he actually (begrudgingly lol) likes. AND THAT MEANS A LOT COMING FROM LEONA, WHO HAS A ROYAL PALATE AND IS A SUPER PICKY MASTER CHEF/CULINARY CRUCIBLES JUDGE.

AYO, we got the first cover art for the Episode of Octavinelle manga... Big fan of the golden octopus and the intricate tentacles. And, once again, Azul's posed in that smug businessman way 💀 knowing that you'll probably purchase him...

This volume will be avaliable on the 26th of January.

[just-jordie-things]

home run - inumaki toge

word count: 5.5k warnings: swearing, idk anything about baseball so it’s mostly made up summary: toge helps coach you on how to play baseball before the big game for the exchange event.  you can’t stop flirting with each other.  (unestablished relationship!) more info: aged up characters! jujutsu tech is a college, still usual first and second years a/n: remember when i said this edit had me in a chokehold well i wrote this forever ago for myself and the toge loving bbies :) ___

When it was announced that the second portion of the Jujutsu Exchange Event would be held via baseball game, (y/n) visibly paled.  So much so that she’d been instantly teased by one of her underclassmen for her obvious discomfort.

“Don’t tell me you don’t know how to play baseball!” Nobara threw her head back as she cackled obnoxiously.  “It’s the easiest sport!” 

“Kugisaki don’t be rude” Megumi grumbled, kicking his friend in the ankle as punishment for laughing at her superior.  He seemed to be the only one who cared about such formality.

The group of them, the first years and second years, had been heading back towards the building for a lunch break in between events.  She dragged her feet along the path, wishing time would slow down and stop altogether before she had to step foot on that field.

“I know how to play,” (y/n) defended herself, but her hold on the strap of her sheath tightened with her anxiety.  “I’m just not good at it” She admitted in a quiet voice.

“That’s okay! We’ll try to give you an easy position then!” Itadori offered kindly.

She gave the boy a weak smile, grateful for his positive attitude, but still feeling the pang of embarrassment.

How she sucked at such a simple game was beyond her.  Had it been a proper duel, she would be an excellent candidate.  Swinging a sword- or nunchucks or spear or axe- came easy to her.  Which she was able to demonstrate in the first part of the event.  She’d scored quite well for her school, even when outside forces interrupted the fun and games and things had gotten real very fast.

But when it came to swinging a bat and hitting that dumb little ball, she whiffed it almost every time.  It was humiliating, knowing she had the strength to cut a head clean off a body, but couldn’t play a game that was mostly catch.

Her pace slowed until she lingered behind the rest of the group, who were busy assigning positions for the coming game.  If the ground swallowed her whole for the next few hours, she wouldn’t complain.  

“Tuna tuna” 

Lifting her gaze she found Toge stopping in his tracks as the rest of their classmates headed up the stairs without them.  Even with his collar zipped up, she could see he was smiling at her, undoubtedly pitying her helplessness.

“Put me to sleep, Toge,” She sighed dramatically, to which he chuckled.  “I’m serious,” She mutters at him.  “This is going to be so embarrassing, I wish we could’ve just done something else.  Like archery” 

He shrugs his shoulders, before glancing back at their friends again, seeing they were already headed inside, and apparently hadn’t noticed their separation from the group.

He turns back to her again, and tilts his head for her to follow him.  She does so without question, partially because she didn’t want to sit through an awkward lunch where the group planned what position would be easy enough for her to handle, but partially because she had taken such a liking to him that she’d follow him anywhere he tried to take her.

This wasn’t new.  Since the day they met the two of them had been close, hitting it off like they were old friends reunited.  His cursed speech never proved to be an obstacle, it hadn’t taken long for (y/n) to understand him as if onigiri ingredients was her foreign language choice in grade school, and she made an effort to always ensure they were having proper conversations that she’d have with anyone else.

Well, not entirely.  She didn’t exactly flirt with everyone else or whisper with hushed giggles with everyone else, but you get the point.  They clicked.

It doesn’t dawn on her where he’s leading them until they’re approaching the baseball field, and when they do, she lets out an exasperated groan.

“Toge, no” She whines, giving him pleading eyes to spare her from more embarrassment.

He rolls his eyes back at her, and grabs her by the wrist to drag her along the rest of the way when she tries to plant her feet and stay put.  She could go boneless and let him literally drag her, but she stumbles and follows along anyways.  Perhaps once he saw how terrible she truly was at the sport, he’d give up on helping her practice and ditch her out here.

Although she knew this couldn’t possibly be a real possibility.  He wasn’t capable of doing such a thing.

“Salmon!” He cheers when he finds that all of the equipment for the event had been prepared, helmets and gloves sitting neatly on the bleachers, and a tall basket of baseball bats ready to be used.

He pulled one out, smacking the head of the club in his other hand as though to analyze it, even though they were all brand new and had never been touched.

He looks up at (y/n) with a grin that just barely peeks out of his collar.  She frowns back at him.

“Don’t do this to me,” She pleads.  “I thought we were friends” 

He laughs again, and tosses her the bat without warning.  At least her reflexes are sharp enough that she catches it without difficulty.

“Salmon!” He cheers for her, and she shoots him a more deadly look.

“I can catch things,” She mutters, turning her gaze to the bin of baseballs and the gloves lined up on the bleachers.  “It’s the rest that I’m shit at” 

He scoffs at her in disbelief, but he had yet to see the proof.  (y/n) chewed on the inside of her cheek as she watched him select his own bat, and then nod at her to follow him to the plate.

If she ran away, he probably wouldn’t chase her down, she figured as she followed him up to the white rubber base- just as untouched as the rest of the equipment.  She dismisses the idea just as quickly as it crosses her mind though.  She wasn’t capable of ditching him, either.

Toge gestures for her to stand a bit in front of him as he takes his stance at the plate.  She does so, holding the hilt of the bat loosely as she rests it on her shoulder.  He continues to gesture for her to understand what he’s doing.  First it’s to his feet, spread evenly but not too far from one another, just enough to keep his balance solid.  Then he bends his knees the slightest, probably to give him a good range of motion.  She could understand this much.

Then he holds his bat out towards her as he carefully maneuvers his hands around it’s handle.  His grip tightens, and then he looks up at her expectantly, as though asking, got it?

She nods back at him wordlessly, and then he goes back into straightening up his stance.  Her eyes track every movement with intense precision, wanting to commit every detail to memory.  From the angle that his left elbow rests at, to where he holds the bat just behind himself, ready for the swing.

He raises his eyebrows at her, which she doesn’t notice right away since she’s too busy studying everything about his stance rather than his face.  She could almost hear the teasing voice behind the look he’s giving her.  Good, right?

“Mustard leaf?” He asks, in that exact tone she’d heard in her head.

“Yeah yeah, I got it” She nods.

He nods back at her, and then slowly goes through the motion of a swing, so she could clock every detail.  After he finishes the follow through, he repeats the motion properly, swinging the bat with full force.  Enough so that she can hear the aluminum cutting through the air.

He asks his question again when he’s done, and again, she nods at him.

“Yeah, I think I can handle that,” She says.  “Should I pitch for you?” 

Toge shakes his head and waves his hand for her to come up to the plate.  When she stops just in front of him, he giggles, and drops his bat to the ground so he can reach out and take hold of her shoulders, so he can properly guide her to the base.

Despite the way her face heats up when he keeps his hands on her as she tries to copy the way he’d just been standing there, she doesn’t mind feeling a little shy about it.  Feeling shy around Toge wasn’t nearly as embarrassing as having him teach her this simple sport.

In fact, it was never embarrassing to be reduced to a blushing mess around him.  It happened too often for her to feel any shame in it, but it helped that she often brought the same behavior out of him, too.  She just couldn’t see his pink cheeks when he’s standing behind her, mumbling unintelligibly as she took her stance.

She’s certain of herself once she raises the bat behind her shoulder, almost knocking him in the head, but Toge swerves and hopes she doesn’t notice.

“How’s that?” She asks with confidence.

His hands fall from her shoulders as he checks her over, and he winces behind his collar.  His lack of response has her looking over her shoulder with a frown.

“Really?” The confidence is zapped out of her straight away.

He chuckles, and shrugs his shoulders with a small smile as if to ease her worry.  Then his hands are on her again, guiding her arms to the proper places where she’d have the best range of motion.  The toe of his shoe taps the inside of her left foot, silently prompting her to slide it out just a bit further.  She follows the instruction until he raises his hand.  Then he gives her a beam and a nod of his head to confirm she was positioned just right.

“You’re sure?”

“Salmon” He reaffirms.

He steps back then, twirling his finger around in the air so that she could show him her swing.  She looks unsure, but she lets out a breath and lets her body follow through as naturally as she could.

She feels good about it, but she doesn’t know any better.  When she looked over to Toge again, he had just unzipped his collar, ready to cheer when she swung just fine.  Instead, he wears what she would call his polite smile.  It was his friendly way of displaying something wasn’t quite right, but he was too nice to critique harshly.  (y/n) frowns back at him.

“That bad?” She asks quietly when he approaches her again.

His smile brightens and he shakes his head at her.  He was far too nice to her.  If Maki was training her, she gladly would have laughed in her face before barking out orders on how to shape up.

Toge hand waves about, telling her to take her stance again.  This time her footing is just right, and he beams proudly at the improvement.  She manages a smile back at him, his silent praise giving her a little more confidence in learning.

He does a little circle around her, making sure everything is as it should be.  There’s a pause in his step just behind her, where she’s holding her bat.

“Bonito flakes” He pats his hand over once of hers, and she fixes up her grip on the handle, then turns to look at him.

“Like that?” She asks, not sure of what her mistake had been.

It must not have been fixed, because he reaches his hand to hers, gently fingers prodding at her hand in silent instruction until she loosends her hold.  He quickly raises his hand away again, giving her a thumbs up.  Her grip was still secure, but her knuckles weren’t white with tension now.

After that, Toge comes behind her again, poking at the top of the baseball bat before giving her an affirmative nod to take a swing.

She does as told, slowly of course, so as not to smack him in the face on her follow through.  He stops her before she even finishes, his hand patting her shoulder so she’d fix up her stance again.  Third time was the charm, and her posture and hold are perfect as she straightens up.

“Tuna” The quiet instruction to pay attention is whispered in her ear as he takes a small step closer so that he could guide her properly through the swing.  

One hand lays over hers on the handle of the bat, and the other slides around her opposite arm until it stops at her elbow.  Her face is so hot now she wishes she was wearing one of those dumb helmets to at least hide it a little.

He guides her through the motion slowly, his hand on her elbow wobbling a little.  It takes her a second to catch up, but she realizes he’s telling her that her swing was uncoordinated.  She nods in understanding.

Before she gets the chance to take her stance again, he’s already guiding her back to the proper position, his eyes studying her grip carefully to be sure everything is in order.

He’s so close now that she can feel his soft breaths on the back of her neck, and baseball is quickly becoming the furthest thing from her mind.  The hand that is resting on hers is so soft but so firm in it’s hold, making sure she didn’t strengthen or loosen her grip in the slightest.  If she shuffled back even an inch, her back would hit his chest.  It’s unbearably hot today, she’s grateful she thought to tie her hair up so it wouldn’t stick to the back of her neck, but she has half the mind to close those last pesky inches of space between them.

“Mustard leaf?” Toge’s hand pats at her elbow, beckoning her to pay attention.  He must’ve noticed she’d zoned out.

“Sorry,” She mumbles, snapping back to reality.  “You’re being distracting”

She’s scolding him, he can tell in the tone that she doesn’t mean it to be one of her more usual flirty comments.  Nonetheless, Toge preens, grinning down at her, even though she was trying to avoid looking at him.  It was hard, seeing as he was right there, and even standing behind her he was tall enough that he could see a blush creeping up her cheeks.

This time, rather than let her swing on her own, he moves her through the motions himself.  It’s horribly slow, especially when her swing reaches it’s apex and he’s pulled even closer from the motion.  Her teeth sink into her bottom lip as she struggles to keep her focus on paying attention to her form.

“Salmon” Toge gives her a smile as he finishes guiding her through the follow through.  He’s certain she has the technique down now, but when she looks at him, her expression is defeated.  His brows furrowed in confusion.  “Mustard leaf?” 

“This isn’t going to work,” She huffs, lowering the bat until it almost hits the ground.  “It’s too..” She trails off, waving her free hand around in a sporadic motion.  “Too much!” 

He seems to catch her drift, his shoulders shaking as he chuckles at her.

“Don’t laugh at me”

He sticks his bottom lip out at her in a dramatic pout.

Her brows pinch together before drawing upwards, pleading with him not to mess with her more than he already had.

“I’m sorry I’m not getting it!” She cried, her leg bouncing with her irritation.  “But you’re the worst teacher!” 

“Bonito flakes!” He took offense to the comment, and (y/n) gave him a deadpan look.

“You know what I mean,” She says in a quieter volume.

He tilts his head and feigns a confused expression, just to watch her blush and squirm.

“You’re being a jerk you know” She tells him, her eyes locked on his even when he walks closer and grins in her face.  He’s waiting expectantly for her to explain what he already knew.

He flustered her.  It wasn’t the first time, and most certainly wasn’t the last.  But truthfully, Toge hadn’t been aiming to flirt with her.  He just wanted to help her out with her swing.  Seeing her blushing and flustered was just an added bonus.

She’s the first to surrender.

“Okay fine,” She lets out a heavy breath and raises her bat again.  “Show me one more time, then you can pitch for me” 

Toge’s grin is plastered on his face as he repositions himself again, but this time she swears he’s standing just a little closer than before as he guides her hand and elbow through her swing.

He lets out a low whistle when he draws her back again so they can practice through it one more time, even though (y/n) was certain now that she had it down.  She starts to pull away, but before she can tell him that she thinks she has it now, he tuts at her and drags her back towards him.  This time her back does hit his chest, and she doesn’t protest again.  

Even though her footing is all off, and there’s no way she could deliver a proper swing when his chin is tucked against her shoulder where her bat should hover.  He’s close enough that he can see- and hear- the heavy gulp she swallows.  He giggles at her before pulling away the hand he had on her elbow.  He lets out a small mumble of an onigiri ingredient she doesn’t quite catch because his breath is hitting the crook of her neck and he’s just so close that she feels dizzy.  He brings his hand up to her neck, knuckles skimming over the nape and then along the junction of her shoulder so he could pull away the few strands of hair that had fallen loose from her ponytail.

She giggles at the ticklish feeling, and he forgets that he’s supposed to be coaching her as he raises his fingers to brush over the spot again.  This time she tilts her shoulder as she laughs again, a jerky motion as the muscle reacts on it’s own accord, but it brings his face closer to hers as she does so.  He laughs to himself just from hearing her giggles as he continues to tease the sensitive spot.

“Toge!” She tries to shove him away, but he’s quick to drop his other hand from where she had a hold on the bat, wrapping his arm around her front and holding her hip firmly so she couldn’t wiggle away from him.  He laughs almost too joyfully as she continues to giggle and squirm in his hold.  “Toge! Qu-quit it!” She stammers over the relentless giggles he forces out of her, and it seems to only spur him on further.

She’s reduced to broken gasps between her fits of laughter, and the bat falls from her hand before she realizes.  Even when it bounces on the sand and rolls across the ground she doesn’t pay it any mind, too busy using her free hand to try to grab at his arm and get him to loosen his hold on her.

Her attempts are futile.  His hold on her is firm, and even when she gets a good grip on his sleeve, he retaliates by keeping her snug against him, and then lifting her off the ground altogether.  Her feet kick and scramble, somewhat from the lack of ground beneath them, more-so from the way her body reacts to his continued tickling.  Both of her hands are now occupied by gripping onto his arms to keep her anchored somehow, but even in the delirious state he’s sinking her into, she knows he wouldn’t drop her.

Eventually Toge’s laughing at her too much to care about continuing to tickle her, even though he took great amusement in it, he was now entertained enough by having her in his arms, even if she was kicking at the air for him to put her down.

She’s shouting his name between bursts of giggles that still escape her like after shocks.  The sudden bout of goofiness from him is a little lost on her, but even as she hollers at him to put her down, her threats are empty.  She sinks into his hold and accepts whatever fate he has in store for her.

Her head tilts back until it hits his shoulder, and she can just barely peek up at him.  His face is split with a grin, lavender eyes hooded and dazed as he gazes back down at her.

Toge’s never needed words to flirt with her.  Sure sometimes his texts had certain incriminating emojis, and the notes he’d pass her in class were also damning evidence of his affections.  But (y/n) could feel all of that coming from him just from the way he looks at her, like right now.  He had an intense gaze, and she was sure that if she was brave enough to not break away from the eye contact, that she could penetrate his mind and read his thoughts directly.

Finally, he sets her down, his grip on her loosening, just as her hands on his forearms did once she had her feet on the ground again.  She giggles at him, giving him a cheeky little smile as she turns to properly face him.  Her hands take hold of his wrists as she ensures the proximity between them doesn’t shift too much.  

Logically they should get back to perfecting her swing, the lunch break would be over soon and the game would begin shortly after.  Not that logic is able to cling onto a single thought in her starry eyed stupor.  She looked up at him like he was the prettiest thing she’d ever seen, softening before him in her gaze and the smile on her lips.

She had been patient, at least she thinks she has.  She’s enjoyed the little game they’d been playing, the lingering touches, the flirty remarks met with longing gazes.  Their mannerisms were anything but platonic, and if anyone were to snatch their phones they’d scramble to delete their messages with each other.

But it had been quite some time of this game as she’d affectionately referred to their… whatever this was.  And her patience was wearing thin waiting for him to make a move.  She didn’t know what he was waiting for, she was certain that she’d made her position clear.  Especially now, clinging onto him and staring up at him expectantly.  It was just the two of them, and they were so close, it wouldn’t take much for him to just fucking kiss her already-

Toge’s movements are quick as he pulls his arms so his wrists fall out of her hold, only for him to squeeze her hands quickly before moving past her.

“Tuna mayo” He beckons her to follow him back to the plate, but she’s stunned in place for a minute.

Did he really just brush that off? She shook her head as she went back to home plate, picking up her bat and tapping it against the ground to shake off the excess sand that had clung to it when she’d dropped it.  Had she not communicated well enough through her eyes? She’d stared at him with her best ‘kiss me now!’ look.  Her brow furrowed as she watched Toge grab a glove and baseball from the leftover equipment.

He jogs out to the pitcher’s mound, giving her a thumbs up and an affirmative cheer.  With a determined look on her face, (y/n) straightens up her stance, her hands curling around the handle on the bat until muscle memory took over and she found the correct hold on it.

Toge throws a perfect pitch, his movements clean as his long limbs work in harmony to send the baseball hurtling towards her.  Her eyes never leave the ball as she tightens her grip, takes the smallest of steps forward, and swings.

The crack sounds so loud the aluminum trembles in her hold from the harshness of her hit.  Even Toge’s impressed enough that he’s frozen as his eyes follow the flight of the ball over his head.  He was confident in her ability, after some coaching anyways, but he wasn’t expecting such a solid swing.  Had Jujutsu Tech gone the cheap route and got wooden bats, he was certain this one would’ve been ruined.

As if having the same thought, their eyes simultaneously rip away from the ball’s trajectory towards the outfield, and they look at each other expectantly.  

They both break into a full sprint in opposite directions.  (y/n) drops the bat haphazardly as she takes off for first base, and Toge’s racing to the outfield in the hopes of miraculously catching the ball before it lands.  However, it’s already begun it’s descent so the odds are slim to none.

(y/n) knows she should keep her focus on running and hitting all the bases properly, but she can’t help but throw her head over her shoulder to keep an eye on Toge.  He scrambles to grab the ball just as she’s touching second base.  

She squeals with delight when he makes a break for home plate, and tries to push herself to run faster, but she’d already decided to give this run of the bases her full power, seeing as it was just the two of them.

He’s gaining on her when she crosses third, and a string of laughter escapes her from the anticipation.  It’s not a real game, but her competitive nature had been tapped into as soon as she struck that ball, and now all she cares about is winning.

As home plate nears she can feel Toge getting closer.  She doesn’t dare look at him again, instead opting to do whatever it took to get her on that plate before he can.  Her heart is racing, she’s panting for air, the sun is beating down impossibly hotter, but she doesn’t care.  She’s about to take the win.

Toge has other plans, darting around her and coming up on the plate with more speed than before.  She gasps in offense at his drive to take this from her, but it sparks that competitive fire in her again, and she comes up with a faster plan.

With as much momentum stored as possible, she drops to the ground.  She falls with grace but hits the sand unceremoniously.  The course grit is uncomfortable on her skin as she slides across the ground with the force of her body weight.  Her dominant leg is outstretched, foot angled outwards in the hopes of touching that damn white plate before he can.

She cheers in premature victory when she feels the brush of solid rubber against her sneaker.

The pride is short lived when she feels another foot collide with hers just as the rest of her body is sliding over the plate, and before she can stop herself, she’s effectively tripped Toge right off his feet, and he’s falling to the ground.

They both barely let out a yelp in surprise before he’s crashing into her.  He just barely braces himself with his palms hitting the sandy ground on either side of her head, so his full weight doesn’t hit her, but she’s still properly knocked the wind out of him.

The look of shock on her face fades away as she begins to giggle.  The corners of her eyes crinkle and her smile only grows wider as the giggles grow louder.

“I did it!” She cheers loudly, even though his face is inches away from hers.  “I hit a home run!” 

“Bonito flakes” Toge mutters, and she’s not sure if he’s cursing for her knocking him down or if he’s correcting her because technically in a real game that wouldn’t be a home run, but she doesn’t care.

She ignores his indignation completely.  Her hands shoot up, grabbing either side of his unzipped collar, earning a startled look in response from the sudden impact.

Her eyes light up, and Toge blinks to make sure he’s reading this look right.  The way her lashes grow heavy as her eyes flicker in between his a few times, before lowering to rest on his lips.

His lips? She’s looking at his lips? 

In her moment of not paying attention, his own gaze lowers, mentally tracing the soft edges of her smile.  He thinks he’s quick when he brings his line of sight back to hers, but she’s staring right at him again, and her smile is brightening, having caught the glance.

“Just kiss me already” 

She’s barely finished the command and he’s obeying it like she was the one who bore the snake eyes and fangs.  Leaning down the rest of the way so quickly his hands shuffle in the sand to fix his center of gravity before his lips slant over hers.  She kisses him back instantly, and with fervor, her soft lips moving against his in a quick pace.

Once Toge has a good balance, he shifts so that he only needs to hold himself up with one hand, so that the other can gently cradle her jaw.  His fingers skim over her neck before resting in her hair.  He’s getting sand all over her skin, but she’s already covered in the stuff from her showboating slide to home plate, so he figures she won’t mind.

She hums in delight as her own hands begin to travel.  The sound is heaven to his ears, and his nose prods against hers as he moves to deepen their kiss.  She’s tracing over his shoulders and then the nape of his neck before diving into the soft strands of platinum blonde that aren’t even damp.  Seriously, didn’t they do the same amount of sprinting just now? He didn’t break a sweat? 

The thought makes her let out a little chuckle, and their kiss finally breaks when she does.

Toge’s brow furrows at her in the slightest, wondering what she could find so humorous, but she looks so pretty like this- laughing, beneath him, with kiss swollen lips that were his doing- that he doesn’t even mind.  He just admires her while she blinks a few times to ease her vision to the sunlight.

“It’s nothing,” (y/n) mumbles when she sees the faint confusion in his expression.  “Was just startin’ to think you’d never make a move” 

Toge chuckles back at her, finding some humor in the comment.  He’d been waiting for her, she was the one with all the flirty remarks after all, but he won’t complain.  He could tease her about it later.

He leans back so she could sit up properly, and takes her hand to help her up to her feet with him.  She begins to awkwardly brush the sand off of her clothes, but quickly realizes it’s no use and gives up.  They share a laugh at her weak attempt to dust off.

“Have you guys been out here this whole time!?” 

A distant holler steals their attention, and their classmates are making their way to the field.  Toge frowns at the realization that their alone time was over, and now they had to gear up for the finale of the Exchange Event.

(y/n) notices the sour look, and squeezes his hand to bring his attention back to her.

“Hey, how about another game?” She suggests with a glint of excitement in her eye that should make him nervous, but he nods eagerly.  “If we win this game, we can hang out in my room after,” She suggests, and then her cheeks turn pink.  “And make out some more?” She adds in a softer tone, the confidence in the offer evaporating as soon as she’s actually saying the words out loud.

Toge’s face lights up as he nods in agreement to her rules.

“What!?” Panda’s voice booms and echoes throughout the field, and was likely heard even past that.

Toge and (y/n) share a wince.  They’d conveniently forgotten about Panda’s enhanced hearing abilities.

Judging from the curious looks from the others and Panda’s erratic movements as he spoke, it was clear that he was telling everyone else what he’d overheard as well.

“Cheer for me when I hit a home run?” (y/n) beams at Toge, who nods back at her happily.  He raises his hand, sticking his thumb and pinky out before shaking his hand in a ‘hang loose’ motion.  A simple action he did often to show support for his friends.

“Salmon” He affirms.

“Okay, I’ll cheer for you too” She says sweetly, standing on the tips of her toes to plant a quick kiss on his cheek, before making her way to their approaching friends, eager to tell them about her success with baseball.

They were more curious about the bases she hit with their resident cursed speech user rather than the actual bases of the game.  

… then again, so was she.

___

a/n: breathe if u want me to write a part two where they celebrate winning the game teehee

xoxo ~ jordie

[veryinnovative]

@jegulus-microfic | january 2, prompt: fire | word count: 1.575 featuring older ceo regulus black and younger intern james potter

“A truffle wagyu burger with hand-cut fries? What does that even fucking mean?!” James shouts into the receiver as he winds through the busy masses of bodies crossing the roads, the traffic light across blinking for him to hurry. “Can’t I pick up something for him from Burger King or something? You know, like a normal human being?” 

On the other end of the line, Barty snorts a derisive sound. “Yeah, you try feeding him cheap chain franchise slob and see how that plays out for you. The fucker thinks Versace is a low-class brand, James. He probably doesn’t even know what the inside of a Burger King looks like. Besides, that place is fire. They have good shit.”

Groaning, James picks up the speed and sets out for a sprint, having missed the bus to Howick and resorted to the most reliable way of transport—his two sets of healthy, always moderately trained legs. 

“Are you running? You better not be fucking running, Potter. You’re going to come back all sweaty and with creases in your cheap-ass button-up and then I’m going to be the one getting shit for not driving you and ruining the image of Regulus Black’s executive assistant—”

“Suck a dick, Barty,” James bites back after barely evading a car, its tires screeching at him in warning. He throws the driver an apologetic smile.

“I’m serious. You meal-prepped, Potter! Asked where the fucking office microwave is, are you out of your mind? Lunch is on company credit, for fuck’s sake. You’ve got an image to uphold now you’re working for Black Enterprises!”

“The cafeteria is too rich for my taste. Besides, I like meal-prepping. It’s calming.”

“Your fucking tuna stinks up the place.”

“Maybe that’s just your big bullshitting mouth.”

“Listen here, you piece of—”

“Oops, entering a tunnel, hear that?” James cups a hand over the receiver and makes a low, grating sound—mimicking the static rasp of a bad cellular connection. “See you!”

He tucks away the phone before entering Beauxbatons, the restaurant Barty had told him to go to because Regulus was craving his guilty snack, which, to James, sounded like an item right off a witch’s menu. Then again, he was a poor twenty-three-year-old who had just had a gap year fresh out of university, lived in a run-down apartment tucked in Southern London, and knew nothing of the expensive tastes a man like Regulus Black possessed. Thirty-something years old and not a single skin blemish. Must be all the fucking truffle and caviar and whatever Boiron guava puree he eats.

“Welcome,” one of the employees asks. Of course, all of the staff are also wearing pristine clothes and have perfectly sleeked-back hair.

“Hi,” James answers, now all too conscious of the developing sweat marks below his armpits and the dampness cooling on his back. “I’m, uh, here to pick up lunch? Sorry, I forgot my order so let me have a peek at my messages…”

The employee blinks like James has grown a second head. “Take-away? Sir, this is a dine-in restaurant.”

Good thing James has come prepared. He shuffles through the contents of his bag, phone in the other hand and tip of his tongue peeking out in full concentration. “Oh, that’s alright. I brought something to carry it with me. I also got some Tupperware if you don’t mind rinsing it beforehand.”

“No, sir, it’s not a matter of containers,” the employee starts, her lips pursed into a tight line. “We don’t do takeaways.”

James stops and frowns, bag half slung over his shoulder. “Isn’t this Beauxbatons?”

“It is.”

“My boss sometimes has people pick up his lunch here.”

“You must be mistaken… We do not lend any type of service like that.”

James sighs. Great. Amazing. Just what he needed. “Right. Do you mind if I make a call? I’m sorry, there must have been a mistake then.”

The employee, undoubtedly taking pity on him and his disorderly state that suggests he’s been running the past ten minutes, nods. “Of course.”

Heaving a sigh, James scrolls through his contact list and taps on ‘Regulus’, never mind that he has been firmly instructed to only call him during emergencies. But considering the sort of day he’s been having, he considers this one.

Regulus picks up after the third ring. “Potter?”

It’s been two weeks and he still won’t fucking call him by his name, going off on tangents about formal office conduct and etiquette. Potter this, Potter that, bridling when he’s called by his first name for a change in an environment that would kiss the soles of his feet if he’d ask. “Hi, I’m at the place you sent me the address of but they don’t do takeaways so I wanted to know what you want to eat. You cool with Wagamama?”

There’s a pregnant pause—all too telling of how Regulus is probably taking a deep breath and doing the thing where he either pinches the bridge of his nose or rubs his eyebrows. “Have you mentioned the takeaway is for me?”

“No, I haven’t.” What difference would it make, James wants to ask. But in a world where Regulus Black is pretty much revered, he is confident it would make a little difference at least.

“Do that, Potter.”

James rolls his eyes before returning his attention to the employee. “He wants you to know his name is Regulus, by the way.”

Her eyes widen. “Reg—Do you mean Mr. Black?”

James clicks his tongue. “That the one.” The employee doesn’t look convinced and James holds up his hand just above his chest. “About this tall? Curly black hair? Probably in one of today’s morning tabloids, not hard to miss. I could put him on speaker if you’d like?”

There’s the frantic wave of her hands, head shaking vigorously. “Oh! You should have told me from the start, Sir. Please, what would Mr. Black like to eat for lunch? I—I’m sorry. We are very exclusive in our service and are most honored Mr. Black has once again chosen our humble establishment—”

“Just,” James sighs, skimming over the menu laminated standing on an easel by the entrance, not possessing the energy to listen to someone go off on tangents about his boss again. Not like he does so internally at night, anyway. Absolutely not. “A truffle wagyu burger with hand-cut fries.”

“Not fries, a salad—” Regulus reminds him over the phone, but James has decided that he will just about eat whatever James decides on.

“Potter—” Regulus tries again and James flat-out hushes him. To his surprise, Regulus actually shuts up.

The employee nods, over-excited. “Oh, of course, an excellent choice. How would Mr. Black like it to be cooked?”

James shrugs. “I don’t know, on a grill?”

There’s a faint garbled noise coming from Regulus that James will definitely tuck away in his memory.

But the employee is too thrilled to be serving someone as pompous as Regulus to notice the lack of culinary terminology James possesses. “Oh, I meant the cook of the meat!”

“The cook of the meat?” James repeats. “I don’t know, whoever is on shift? Regulus, who do you want to cook your burger?”

The employee makes a high-pitched sound at the same Regulus sighs in a very exaggerated, exhausted manner. “Just tell them medium rare.”

“Medium? What is this, a video game difficulty?”

“Medium rare!” the employee chirps, her smile wry. Strands of hair stick out of the previously perfectly pulled-back bun like the situation has created plenty of static to dishevel her updo. “One medium rare wagyu—”

“Don’t forget the fries,” James adds, unable to fight off the grin cleaving his face. This, he loves most—fucking with rich people. ‘Who do you want to cook your meat?’ he’s a genius for that one, an absolute innovative mastermind. Make him head of corporate next at this rate.

“You had to call me for this?” Regulus asks him as James watches the poor girl scurry off to the back, undoubtedly to ring in the order and gush about the perfect, rich, hot-looking Regulus Black on the phone by the restaurant’s hallway.

“It was an emergency. I get you the wrong order and you, I dunno, bite off my head like Miranda Priestly.”

“I don’t know a Miranda Priestly.”

“No? Shame. Would’ve loved her, a real feisty woman that one. She works in the fashion industry, though.”

“Potter.”

James tries not to bark out a laugh. He can’t help it, Regulus is just too easy. “Yeah, I’ll get you your overtly expensive A3-grade cut of meat that could pay for my weekly rent. Didn’t take you for the type of man to get burgers, by the way.”

“That’s why I’m asking employees of a lower tax bracket to pick them up for me.”

Okay, that’s kind of funny. Regulus Black can be fucking funny if he wants to, he just rarely chooses to. James barely masks his snort at it. “Got me there, boss.”

“Get a cab back to the office. And stop calling me boss.”

“My bad, Sir,” James drawls, knowing that Regulus reacts particularly well to this specific formality. 

A second of silence that stretches on for a little too long. James clears his throat, wondering if the line cut off. “Regu—”

“See you soon, Potter,” Regulus speaks, faster than usual, almost like he’s flustered, and with a strange pitch to his words before he hangs up.

[heartfullofleeches]

Thembo Shark Reader...

Just this massive behemoth who clears out entire beaches in mere seconds - because they smelled raw meat cooking at one of the pits.

Shark Reader can't catch a break. They're hunted by schools of merfolk, fishermen, and royalty at sea - pursued by life guards and people they've dragged to shore on land. Shark Reader is a passive giant just looking for their next meal and resting place. It's easy to pick up on their docile nature within a few minutes of meeting them - unless they got something in those chompers and asking their new companions if they see the cause of their parallel. That exact scene is what lead to them gaining their little following of merfolk who tailed them from coast to coast. While the meats and other good had been a fine meal, plastic coolers weren't the best thing for a shark's diet and had gotten stuck in their gums. They reworked a net conveniently cast out to sea into floss, freeing the distressed goldfish in the process. They were prepared to swim off and go about the rest of their day - ambushed by the teary eyed school the mermaid belonged to. It's easy to keep their big lovable shark around by catching a couple fish or luring humans out to sea. As long as they fillet their catches properly - Reader can't tell the difference.

Some shitposts under the cut

Yan Sea Captain: Today will finally be the day I catch that beast. A new frame will hang on my wall when its finally mine.

Crew Mate: You mean like that oil painting of you and it in your bedroom.

Yan Sea Captain: Another word and you'll be the bait

-

[Shark Reader carries a surfer back to shore and sticks their board in the sand]

Shark Reader: Not Safe that far out. Sharks

Surfer: o-ok... [frantically searches for that "lifeguard for hire" poster they saw at the entrance to the beach]

Yan Lifeguard, standing on a boat: Are you ready for your first swimming lesson?

"n-no?"

Yan Lifeguard: Fantastic! [yeets their victim into the water and swims back to shore waiting for someone to notice]

-

Yan Researcher: All that time wasted. Had I know this would be the way to win your heart, I'd have done it the day we met, my love

Shark Reader, on their twelfth tuna sandwich and fifth raw steak: I thought it would be pretty obvious

[kisses4lao]

Jamil Jamil, hes our man! (🍋Jamil x gn!reader🍋)

Okay so this is a belated birthday gift for my beloved boyfriend <<333

I mainly based the things reader says and does over things he'd personally do but I did want to post this on here so he could read it anytime

♧CW: reader is referred to with they/them but is fem bodied, smut and comfort, probably ooc jamil bc we love it when he's soft, first time sex, reader is dealing with a lot of shit fuck and jamil Is so sweet such husband, unsafe sex, its premarital too, jamil has big pp energy so he absolutely has a big pp here, he doesn't know how to use it tho pls help this man, bath sex and cockwarming near the end btw, smut smut smut oh so smutty we love him!!!!!! Also jamil cums inside?? Idk I might do that ig we'll see LMAO, oh also pet names, oh so many pet names bc me and my boyfriend use them on eachother all the time

♤!!ALL CHARACTERS IN THIS FIC ARE 18+!!♤

♤NOT PROOFREAD yall ever proofread a smut??? Its embarrassing. Im not doing that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

♧ it had been one hell of a week.

Everything that could possibly go wrong, went wrong. Grim was sick beyond belief, no amount of tuna could help him stomach anything. You TRIED to buy more paper towels and better probiotics for him from Sam's shop, but you couldn't afford them because Crowley wasn't paying you enough.

Speaking of Crowley, he had to cut back on your paychecks because the school was putting out too much money for the overblots.

Ace and Deuce were over at ramshackle to help get things fixed up, but the ghosts decided that wasn't a good idea. They started throwing everything around, and one of them hit deuce in the head with a spare candlestick on accident. He wasn't okay, to say the least.

Not only that, but in Crewels class, you weren't paired up with your beloved boyfriend, Jamil! Crewel decided to pair you up with Sebek, and his loud yelling made you lose focus and fuck up the potion, earning a really bad scold from both Sebek, AND Crewel.

But luckily, it was Friday. After school. And you wanted some comfort. And what better way to get that from Jamil himself? Going to the mirror chamber, you get teleported to Scarabia.

Knocking on the door, you're greeted with the ball of sunshine of NRC, the Scarabia housewarden himself. "Hey you! I've been hoping you'd swing by, Jamil seems a little down, think you can cheer him up?" Seems like he's in the same position. No worries, you guys are always help eachother through bad times. Having kalim escort you throughout the halls, you're infront of his door, Jamils door.

Knocking on the door, Kalim yells out to him, "hey Jamil! Your s/o is here! They wanna hang out with you!" He leans on the door, ear pressed against it as you do the same. You can hear jamil yawn from the other side, seems as though he just woke up.

"Come in." He says. Kalim bids his farewell as you open the door to see your beloved. "Ah, my love, I've been hoping you'd come by." He said with a smile as he stood up from his desk. "Jamil! I'm so glad you're here, I heard from Kalim that you were upset.. are you okay?" "I'm more worried about you, dear. You've had quite the week. I've been worrying about you, thats all."

He walks over to his closet and pulls out a stick of incense. Lighting it up and putting it in a holder, he begins to walk over to you. "How are you doing? Are you okay?" He asks as he takes your hands and leads you to sit on his bed, sitting next to you after. You start to twiddle your thumbs, something he picked up that you did when you were nervous.

"I'm just.. I'm so tired... mentally, physically, everything hurts.." you say as you begin to shed tears. Jamil lightly cups your face with one hand and takes your hands in his empty one. He leaves Featherlite kisses on you cheeks as your tears start to spill, he places a soft kiss on your lips before speaking. "Honey, I know this is hard, okay? But im here whenever you need me. I'll always be here, no matter what. You're such an amazing person, everything about you entices me. You're so beautiful, and smart- and I just can't stand seeing you upset. You're so amazing, you don't deserve to feel like this, but im here for you. Always."

Looking into his eyes show nothing but love. He slowly leans in to kiss your lips. Its soft, and sweet. Perfect for him, his lips are so soft against yours. After a few seconds, he pulls away, letting a string of saliva connect the two of you as he places his forehead against yours. "I love you, never forget that." He says, placing another soft kiss on your lips.

"I love you too." You say, deepening the kiss. You begin to nibble on his lower lip, asking for permission and when he gives you it, you slip your tongue in. His mouth is sweet, warm, comforting. You just couldn't help but want more.

You can tell he was getting excited. He usually does when the two of you make out, but he doesn't say anything most of the time. He just excuses himself and takes care of it, coming back like nothing happened. But, what if you just, took it further this time? I mean, Jamil was such an amazing boyfriend, who else would you want to take your first? You knew he was a virgin too, though you have talked about sex in the past with him you couldn't help but notice how shy he'd get when you got too close.

Taking the initiative, you place your palm on his growing bulge, just to earn a surprised grunt from Jamil, followed with him pulling away from the kiss and halting your movements by holding your wrist. "(Y/n).. what are you doing? I mean, I know what you're doing, but are you sure nows a good time? I mean, like, I want to do this, I do, but, you're upset.. you're vulnerable.. I dont want to take advantage of that. I want you to be in the right mindset for this.. thats all." He looks at you with genuine concern in his eyes, but deep down you can see a hint of lost aswell.

"Jamil.. please, I need you. I've wanted this for so long and I just need a stress reliever.. please, you're the only one who can make me feel better.." tears start to form in your eyes out of sexual frustration. Cant someone just want to be dicked down by their boyfriend in peace? Apparently not in this economy.

Jamil takes a second to think, hand still cupping your face as he avoids looking you in the eye. Looking back at you, he begins to speak. "I just don't want you to think im taking advantage of your vulnerability. So, tell me you want this, and I'll give you everything I have. Promise." He says as he places a soft kiss on your forehead.

"I want this, I want you Jamil." You say with a nod. A smile shows on his face as he stands up and walks to his bathroom. Coming back after a few moments, he has some things in his hands. "I have condoms and stuff, but if you want to we can do it raw and have you take plan b in the morning? Whatever you want dear, im fine with whatever." Taking a minute to scan everything over, you answer. "Raw. Raw is better. Cum inside me too. Please." Blunt. Jamil got so red from you saying that, he starts tripping over his words, which puts a smile on your face.

"Are you sure? Like, SERIOUSLY, are you sure?? I'm just, I-I'm flattered, really, but we don't have to do this, im okay with wearing condoms, or not doing anything at all!" Jamil says as he avoids looking you in the eyes again. Instead of answering with words, you just answer by kissing him, interlocking your fingers with his, giving them a tight yet gentle squeeze. He seems to take the hint and goes back to the bathroom with everything in hand, putting it away.

He comes back looking as red as a tomato as he walks to the bed and sits next to you. Turning to you, you're able to finally be able to catch his lips into a sweet kiss again. This one getting heated quickly with your tongues dancing in a matter of seconds. You begin to take his jacket off as he slowly unbuttons your dress shirt, leaving enough open so he can begin touching your exposed skin. Slipping of his shirt, you begin to touch his chest, reveling in how toned his stomach is.

He begins to slip off your panties with one hand while the other touches the plush of your thighs. Taking the undergarments off and throwing them somewhere in the room, the takes his middle and ring finger and begins to grab slick while unintentionally brushing up against your clit, earning a loud, unexpected moan from you. He begins to push his fingers into your entrance while kissing you, swallowing and hushing your moans.

As he begins to pump his two fingers in and out of you, he takes his thumb and begins to stimulate your clit, which makes you scream his name whilst breaking your kiss. "Shhh honey, I know you like it, but we must be quiet, we don't want anyone intruding, do we?" He says with a tease in his voice as he begins sucking hickeys on your neck in private places. You still have school after all, he wouldn't want you to get in trouble.

With all of the stimulation, you can quite quickly. How couldn't you? Jamil had two fingers inside you, scissoring and curling while his thumb was rubbing circles on you clit. Coming down from your high, you take steady breaths as Jamil begins to unbuckle his belt, taking his pants and boxers off in one go.

Placing one hand on your hip as his other aligns his long, stiff member with your entrance, he looks into your eyes with nothing bit pure love. "If you ever feel uncomfortable, or want to switch positions, or stop or anything during this, just bite my ear okay? And im not saying nibble, im saying full on bite. I dont give a shit if you draw blood i just want you to be comfortable and happy, okay?" Nodding your head in anticipation, he kisses you as he slowly sinks his member into you.

It hurts. The pain is indescribable, but it quickly morphs into pleasure as he sinks in more. Jamil begins to groan, softly saying under his breath how tight you are, how you're taking him so well, how beautiful you look. Spoonfeeding you praise after praise as he reaches you deepest ends of you.

Finally bottoming out, he hugs your waist, kissing your neck softly. "Tell me when I can move, love." Waiting a minute or two to be adjusted to his size, you speak up. "You can move now." And with that, he begins to thrust in and out of you. Choked moans fill the room from you both as he tries to find a steady pace.

Jamil begins to lean down to your ear, praising how good you feel, telling you how amazing you are and telling you how lucky he is to have you. As he begins to thrust harder and deeper, he begins to kiss you. Its more teeth and tongue than anything, you're both acting like starved beasts who haven't eaten in days.

As Jamil experimentally pulls out and slams his cock back into you, the both of you groan loudly, realizing that he hit your g-spot. As he continues to go in and out of you at a rapid, yet somehow soft pace, you begin to feel his cock twitch inside of you.

Leaning to your ear, he praises you more. "My love, you're making me feel so good. I know you already said I could, but will you please give me permission to cum inside you? You make me feel so amazing, I need you so bad." He says as you moan his name again, not caring who'll hear anymore. Nodding as permission, he releases he load into you, making a few deep thrusts so you cum aswell.

Laying together to catch your breaths, Jamil slowly pulls out, watching as your body twitches from being empty. Going into his bathroom again, he grabs two waters and some sweets for you. "Eat up. You lost a lot of energy just now. I'll go and run a bath for us."

Once you're finished with your snacks and water, Jamil carries you bridal style to the bathroom. Placing you in the bath first, he climbs in after you. He then snakes his arms around your waist and pulls you into his lap. As he begins to wash you up, shampooing your hair and putting bodywash on you, your hands find their way back to his semi hardened member. Jamil practically chokes on his moan as you begin to stroke him, running your finger up and down his shaft.

He looks at you with confusion, earning a small chuckle from you. "One more round? Please?" You say, looking up at him with pleading eyes. He let's out a sigh, picking you up by the waist and slowly sinking you down on his now hardened cock. Getting into a position where your face is buried in his chest, you're content with not moving and just staying as is.

As he begins to wash you more, barely moving his hips as his one hand grips your waist, he starts to kiss more marks into your neck again. "My love, you've sparked something in me. Now im not sure if I can stop after 'one more round'," he practically growls in your ear. This may have been one long week, but this was going to be an even longer night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~♧♧~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[crepes-suzette-373]

"Defective Vinsmoke bros", now in Wano.

The text says something to the effect of "Tie Dye Brothers: Wano Chaos". Specifically, this kind of tie dye (it kind of looks like their hair).

I really need to finish the WCI scenes just to clear out the sad baggage before making more crazy scenes, but I keep on having wild ideas, so here we are. Maybe more Wano stuff later.

One thing for sure though: RIP Law's sanity.

They're still "off" even in Wano because they sometimes can go "off" for, like, many days. Not just a few minutes and hours. It's really random. That's how their hair get stripey. When they're off, the hair grows out blond, but then when they switch back "on" it grows in the rainbow colours again. So each hair strand are actually stripey.

(I think too hard about these things sometimes)

Man, all those fanarts with Yonji and Zoro making the Spiderman meme or being confused for each other aren't wrong. I got confused for a second while drawing this myself.

Also additional LOLs/thinking too hard:

*) The extensions are not streaked blond like their natural hair

*) Tuna cutting knives can be easily as big as katana, with some even going over 100 cm in length (this is about the size of an oodachi sword). In Shokugeki no Sanji, if Sanji had owned one of these he wouldn't need to borrow Zoro's sword, hahahaha.

Random long talk about the clothing patterns:

This drawing is kind of a remix of the 2019 One Piece kimono calendar, but I made the patterns more relevant to their powers instead of just traditional yukata/kimono patterns. And, well, Sanji is just wearing what he wore in the series.

Calendar:

Kabuki costumes inspirations (Wano has a lot of Kabuki inspirations anyway):

Ichiji's fire pattern is based on the costume of Narukami

Niji's cloud and lighting is based on Fuwa Banzaemon

Yonji's wheel patterns is based on Genkurou Kitsune or Kitsune Tadanobu (same character from the same play, but has two names in ukiyoe)

Random aside, the Tadanobu role is probably the most "iconic" of all Kabuki looks, it's what people tend to imagine when they hear "Kabuki". The pose, the makeup, the costume, everything:

[bluesylveon2]

600 Follower Special: Holding Out For a Villain ft. the first years

This is a gift to my followers as a thank you for making it to 600 followers! This is my take on Yuu getting kidnapped and having the first years save her. Enjoy!

Summary: When Yuu gets shipped off to an all-girls school, it is up to the first years to save her. What can go wrong?

Note: platonic first years x Yuu/reader, crack, chaos, humor, and the author not being good at naming things

Warning: not beta read and possible ooc characters

Word Count: 1.9k

Masterlist: here

CRASH

"Ugh, five more minutes Grim." Yuu groaned and buried her face in her pillow, letting her eyes drift off once more…

WOOSH

"Ah!" Yuu screamed as her blanket was rudely taken away from her. She opened her eyes to find her window broken, glass scattered across the floor (she could not wait to hear Vil crying over his masterpiece), and Crowley grinning at her. 

"Good morning, Prefect! I have a big surprise for you because I am so generous!"

"Can't this wait until later today?" Yuu asked, pulling the blanket over her head. Her mind was begging her to go back to bed. 

Crowley shook his head. "No, no. In fact, you are going to a new school!"

Yuu uncovered her face. "A what?"

Crowley wiped a tear from his yellow eyes. "You sound so excited already! The school is an all-girls school called Royal Princess Institute."

Yuu's mind was finally awake at the revelation. "You signed me up for another school?"

"Yes, and you are going right now!" Crowley randomly pulled out a large brown sack, big enough for one of the Leech twins. 

"WHAT?!" Yuu's vision became dark. She kicked and punched everywhere but, to her avail,  was only met by a cloth. 

"Have fun!"

---

"Yuu! Yuu!!! YUU!!!" Grim called out as he entered the shared bedroom. His eyes landed on the empty but disarrayed bed; no human in sight. "Yuu!" The cat monster jumped on the bed, searching for his friend, only to find her discarded phone lying on the nightstand. Grim picked up the phone, trying to figure out what to do. 

"Do I call a teacher? Her friends? What do I do?"

"Grim, is that you?" One of the ghosts asked, entering the room. "Did something happen?"

"Yuu is missing, and she left her phone!"

"Oh, I see. Crowley came by this morning telling her some news. Something about her going to a new school."

Grim's eyes widen in fear, and he felt his heart break. Did his human not care for him? Was she tired of him? He wanted to apologize for their massive tuna budget and would gladly cut it if she returned. 

The ghost sensed fear coming off of Grim's fur. "Don't worry. It was unexpected, and Yuu didn't have much say in it."

Grim let out a sigh of relief. "Which means…she was kidnapped?!" The ghost nodded, and Grim felt the fear come back. 

He needed to do something and fast.

---

Moments like these would cause Grim to gather up the best of the best. An elite team, if you will, of the brightest students of NRC. A group of people who could barge in and save Yuu from the dangers of the pink and glitter of an all-girls school when she should be back in NRC, surrounded by many teenage boys (with trauma, might he add) who overblot every month. 

It was clearly obvious which one was the favorite.

And who was the dream team? A group who could slip in and out without suspicion? The all-star, Avengers-level (Grim had no idea who these people were, but Yuu mentioned them once. Maybe they were a band?) group that would save the Prefect?

The first years. 

Well, what the first years should be. Grim began doubting his choice as Ace and Deuce fought over something meaningless. Jack watched them disapprovingly, Epel was happily chatting with Ortho, and Sebek was talking about Malleus. Just an average day in NRC. 

Maybe he should have consulted a second year like Riddle about this. Or beg one of the third years like Leona to help. 

"Oi! We have a very important topic to discuss." 

Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to the cat monster. 

"What is it?" Epel asked.

"You better not be asking for money to buy tuna?" Deuce frowned, but Grim shook his head.

"It's about Yuu. She has been kidnapped and is forced to go to an all-girls school!"

Anyone could see the six brain cells processing everything. They were all imagining Yuu wearing poofy dresses and being covered in glitter. 

"WHAT?!!"

"WHY?!"

"Who knows?" Grim replied, tears forming in his eyes. "Yuu must be in danger! Who knows what kind of stiff frilly dresses she might be wearing?"

"I understand the feeling," Epel said, recalling the times Vil had him wear the tightest outfits known to man. 

"Exactly! This is why we must save her before it is too late."

Jack crossed his arms and looked at Grim expectedly. "And how are we going to do that?"

"We could send in someone to infiltrate the school…" All eyes landed on Epel, who furiously shook his head. 

"NO! Y'all are not gonna send me to that darn school!"

Ace grinned. "Why not? You already look the part."

Epel looked at the redhead with a glare similar to Vil's. "What did you just say?"

"I said. You. Look. Like. A. Girl."

Epel saw red. "Oh, that's it!" He lunged at Ace, only to be stopped by Jack. The boy kicked and screamed in Jack's grasp. 

"I think that is a horrible idea," Sebek said, and Ortho agreed. 

"I think we should blow up the school. I have a feature Big Brother added that can-"

"NO!" Everyone screamed, including Epel, who stopped flailing and lay still in Jack's arms. 

Deuce slammed his hands against the table, a look of determination in his eyes. Grim smirked; it looked like Deuce had a big brain today. 

"This is getting us nowhere. Look, I have an idea that might work.

---

The plan was simple: break in at night, grab Yuu, and run. 

Why was there chaos as the first years ran back to the Magic Mirror?

Let's rewind.

After traveling long and far (read: they used the Mirror to get there), the group landed in front of a tall, sparkly, pink, and gold castle. The castle had one tall tower overlooking many smaller ones and a big wall surrounding it. There was also a drawbridge leading to the entrance. 

"This looks like something Vil would like," Epel said aloud, and everyone nodded.

"I wonder how Yuu is surviving here? There is too much pink!" Ace exclaimed. 

Grim was already imagining it. His precious human going through how to be a princess, what fork to use first, or balancing a book on her head. Oh, the poor thing!

"We need to save Yuu before she starts balancing books on her head!" Grim yelled, shaking the nearest person's (aka Deuce) head. 

"I've scanned for Yuu's whereabouts, and it looks like she is right there," Ortho said, pointing at the tall tower.

Ace grinned. "Great! Now let's get her!" He said and marched into the castle. The group thought their plan was a piece of cake to disable the cameras, sneak into the school, locate Yuu's dorm, and take Yuu back. The group was walking down a hallway when Epel accidentally tripped and landed on Sebek. The school security was alerted of their presence after Epel and Sebek started arguing about who caused it. Grim facepalmed as Epel cursed loudly in his Harveston accent, and Sebek yelled at the Pomefiore boy. 

Which led to their current situation. 

Ace and Deuce rode on Jack in his wolf form through the castle. Ace told him where to go while Deuce carried a sleeping Yuu in his arms. 

Ortho teamed up with Sebek and used their magic to hold off their pursuers.

And Epel?

He was busy holding Grim out like a weapon and used the cat monster's fire to ward off the many girls asking what his skincare routine looked like. Epel cursed Vil out for making his skin flawless. At least he and Sebek put their earlier argument aside. 

"We need to get out of here!" Deuce yelled.

"We are trying to!" Ace replied. 

"Get away from me, you girls! Back away!" Epel yelled as he finally caught up to Jack and jumped on him with Grim. The boy immediately regretted not bringing some of Vil's products to his dorm to throw at them. They would react like a child with candy. 

"We still have time to blast them out of oblivion," Ortho suggested. 

"NO ORTHO!" The boys yelled, causing Yuu to shift in her sleep. Seriously, how was she sleeping through all of that?

Ortho sighed in defeat. "You guys are no fun."

The group swerved through different teachers and almost returned to where the Mirror stood. They were a reasonable distance away until Grim held out his paw. 

"Look! They're raising the bridge!" Both ends of the drawbridge were slowly coming up.

Ace looked at the mob and the bridge. There were only a few seconds to decide until they were stuck in the school. "We might have to jump."

Deuce looked at him like he was a madman. "Jump?! Are you crazy?"

"Trust me." Ace turned to Ortho and Sebek. "On my signal, I want you two to create a diversion." The two nodded and continued holding the mob off. "You know what to do, Jack."

"Of course," Jack said and sped up. The bridge was getting higher the closer the group got. 

"Hold on tight, you guys!" Ace called back to Deuce and Epel. "NOW!" He yelled to others. 

"Finally!" Ortho exclaimed. He and Sebek combined their magic to create a beam using Ortho's and Sebek's lighting. As their magic created an explosion to stop their pursuers, Jack used his momentum to climb up the raised bridge to jump. 

The group landed on the other side as Ortho flew in with Sebek. 

"We did it!" Ace whooped and high five the first years. 

"That's great, but I think we should run," Deuce said, pointing at the mob, who was currently trying to lower the bridge. 

"Agreed. Let's make a run for it."

And at the end of the day, the first year group saved Yuu and returned to the school. Yuu woke up and did not question how she came back, and the other first years made Crowley promise that she would stay in NRC. 

Everyone found peace for the rest of the school year. 

Except….

Riddle drank his tea as Cater and Trey were sitting around nearby. The redhead was enjoying the peace when Cater suddenly gasped. 

"No way!"

Riddle raised an eyebrow and looked at Trey for an answer, to which the vice-housewarden only shrugged. Riddle sighed and set his cup down. "What are you looking at, Cater?"

"Take a look at this!" Cater held his phone to Riddle's face to show a post on Magicam. The post was talking about a commotion at Royal Princess Institute. "You need to see who's in the picture."

Riddle felt a familiar feeling go through his body as he read the post. He continued scrolling until he saw NRC mentioned. "What is going on here?" The redhead took Cater's phone and continued reading. He ignored most of the unimportant information until he saw the photo. A big white wolf was in the center with three familiar boys and a cat monster riding its back. In the background was another familiar duo; one was flying, while the other was next to some lighting. 

Riddle felt a vein pop out in his forehead. "ACE! DEUCE! IT'S OFF WITH YOUR HEADS!"

Meanwhile, as the other housewardens discovered the news and the first years were getting reprimanded, Yuu slept peacefully on her bed with Grim.

"Yuu, we need more tuna," Grim said while shifting in his sleep, unaware of the chaos outside Ramshackle. 

At least the window was fixed. 

Disclaimer: I do not own Twisted Wonderland and its characters. Those belong to Aniplex, Walt Disney Japan, and Yana Toboso.

©: This story belongs to bluesylveon2 2020-23. DO NOT modify, republish, or plagiarize my work.

[k-dokja]

IT’S NO BIG DEAL — It's a little Big Deal actually.

Summary: You should meet his new friends... all two of them.

"What the hell is this?"

Arguably, he doesn't know if you'd look scarier or less scary without the huge knife you're waving. He has seen you beating people, some of them go out cold with only a kick to the face.

"Not only you went out and got caught up in gang fights, but you also brought back your unruly cohorts to my kitchen? Do you have no fear of death?"

Brad whispers next to him, "She called us unruly cohorts."

"She was raised well," Jake whispers back, "her vocabulary is more developed than us."

"I'm more terrified of the fact that she got us on our knees immediately," Jason hushes back at them, "Who is this girl? Why have you brought us to our deaths?"

Jake throws him a glance with a small smirk on his lips, "She's my future wife. Be nice to her, she'll be your future boss lady."

Jason opens his mouth but snaps it shut when you speak up. "Will you three stop whispering among each other and answer me already?"

With a pacifying smile, Jake raises his hand and gives you an imploring look. "We were hanging out after school and I mentioned to them how I often helped you cook. Hence..."

"Hence you brought them here to freeload?" You raise the knife and Jake flinches back. He knows he's in no real danger, but on some base levels of instinct, his mind's screaming at him to cower and run.

"When you put it like that, it sounds bad," his grin is strained, and he feels cold sweat running down his neck, "you mentioned wanting to test new recipes and I brought you new test subjects, that's all."

Immediately, Jason whips his head to stare at him. "That sounds even worse!"

Jake only grins further, like he didn't throw his friends under the bus a moment earlier. At least, you no longer look mad. You're mulling over his suggestion even, that look on your face when you contemplate is adorable.

Then you glare at him again, "Fine, but you better pull your weight," you say, "I'm not feeding you lots for free."

Brad and Jason are both staring at him now, but he ignores their wide eyes and gets back up on his feet. "As you command, my lady," Jake nods at his friends to follow his lead. After some reluctance, they follow.

You are quick with your delegation around the kitchen, he guesses that comes from your experience commanding him. He doesn't mind, making it go smoother without any unnecessary bickering. After listening to your precise instructions, Jason begins to dice the vegetables while Brad works to season the meat.

Jake has the easier task of helping you knead some dough. "What are we making?" He asks midway through his task, vaguely realizing he doesn't know what he's working on.

"I was going to make pot roast but since your friends probably want to eat sooner, I'm going to make roasted beef with vegetables," you say, "I'm reheating the stew I made yesterday and the rice only needs to be fried, I'll make tuna salad later. That should be quick to prepare."

He snorts. Even with your earlier scolding, you are making enough food to feed the three of them anyway. "Then what are these dough for?"

You throw him a perfunctory glance, "What else? Desserts."

Jake snickers but says nothing in response. Maybe he should have because his silence only leaves space for Jason to butt in. “So, how long have you two been dating?”

He can hear the record scratching in your head. From your expression alone, he knows your head must’ve blanked the moment you heard the question. Unlike you, Jake has no problem with the question. He could’ve taken the initiative to answer it, but he didn’t. Selfishly, he wants to hear the answer from you, even if it’s a denial.

“We aren’t dating,” you frown, “what gives you that impression?”

Jason fumbles, “Well, Jake said—”

Jake coughs loudly, cutting in. “It’s easy to misunderstand, the two of us often spend time with each other,” he hopes his explanation would temper any unfortunate outcome for him, “others can get the wrong idea.”

“Really?” You ask, nonplussed. Somehow, he’s disappointed by your quick recovery from the shock of the situation. “Guess that makes sense.”

Jake, on another hand, turns to Jason and pantomimes zipping his lips shut. He puts on a pleasant smile when you turn back with the pot of stew in your hands, his face is the picture of innocence. In his peripheral vision, he notices Brad clasping his hands in prayers. For who, he can't tell.

Thankfully, you notice none of that and what remains of the cooking session goes on without another noticeable hitch.

There are two things Jake predicted when he brought Jason and Brad over to your place. One of them is that they will see you and fall in love within three seconds because if that happened to him, then no reason why they should be infallible to your wily charm. The second thing is more plausible and amusing all the same, all it takes is for them to eat one bite of your cooking and they'd be heads over heels for you too.

He wouldn't blame them if they never want to leave afterwards. You're simply that irresistible.

Since the previous outcome didn't happen due to your unbridled rage, Jake has a pleased smile on his lips when the boys change their entire demeanour the moment they begin to eat. It's like watching someone actualizing their enlightenment in real-time. Fascinating and wild in equal measure, he can't say he doesn't enjoy watching it.

"So?" Jake asks the question you want to ask but is too polite to mention. You focus on your food, but he knows you're listening because there's a small smile on your lips when Jason answers.

"Holy shit," Jason gawks at him, "you get to eat like this every day?"

Jake grins, "Only when she feels generous enough to grace me with her blessing."

You stick your tongue out at him but the smile on your face when you look back down at your food tells him all. It has been a nice idea bringing Brad and Jason over, even if he did spring it on you out of nowhere.

He could've spent the remainder of the meal watching you, but he knows there are far more productive things he can do. Jake turns to Brad, who has been silent the whole time. Getting his opinion would be a good idea, too. Even if—

"Hey! Eat faster! Brad is eating everything!"

By the end of the meal, Jason and Brad have volunteered for dishes and cleaning duty. You sit at the dining table to monitor them, if only because you don't want anything to happen to your family's chinas. Jake takes the chance to sit back, too. He would love to lend a helping hand, but three would be a crowd.

Besides, he enjoys the chance to talk with you without the interlopers.

"You don't mind?"

He nods at his new friends milling around the kitchen. It'd be a moment before you give him your answer, but the wait is worth it because he's warm all over now. "Not really," you say, "I'd have preferred you giving me a head up so I can prepare better but... it's nice to see you hanging out with friends. You've been hanging out alone for so long."

Jake snorts, "I wasn't hanging out alone, I had you."

"I can't be your only friend, Jake," you chuckle, "'sides, we don't even go to the same school or study in the same grade, it's nice to see you having friends who have more in common with you."

"You and I have plenty in common," he says, "like... we live in the same neighbourhood."

You roll your eyes but your smile is affectionate when you look at him, "Yeah, and once you moved away after you finished school, we'll no longer be friends?"

"You make it sound bad," he laughs softly, "I won't let that happen."

"Mhm, whatever," you hum. "They seem nice, I hope the three of you will stay friends for long. It's better to have many people watching your back since you get into trouble all the time."

He can't help but grin, "Do I seem that unruly in your eyes?"

You arch an eyebrow at him, "Do you want to hear the truth? It will hurt your feeling."

"Please spare me then, my fair lady," he pleads mockingly, "I can only take so much of your cruelty."

Caught in the little bubble he has made with you, Jake fails to overhear the conversation his new friends are making behind his back. All the better because if either of you heard it, he wouldn't know how to play it off without lying.

"...He's whipped."

"He's definitely whipped."

[sleepyxxhead]

༉‧₊˚. flufftober 2023!!

WEEK 2: Grumpy!Megumi x Sunshine!Reader

CONTENT: fem!reader, light swearing, established relationship

WORD COUNT: 1.1k

CHARACTERS: Fushiguro Megumi x fem!reader

NOTES: this one was definitely a shorter one! soz :(

Throughout your relationship with Megumi, you two had both learned to enjoy each other’s company in many different ways. Whether it be a memory to enjoy with others, laughing and having a fun time; or maybe a moment of silence between the two of you, just basking in each other’s presence; and of course, the more intimate moments the two of you shared, getting close and comfy together. 

As autumn began to settle, the days became cooler, leaves of gold and red hues scattered across the ground. Today was one of the last warmer days of the season. You and Megumi walked side-by-side through your local park, leaves crunching under your boots as a small breeze blew across your face. Your pinky was hooked with Megumi’s, swinging your arms back and forth like a child. You wore one of Megumi’s sweatshirts, cradling a small blanket in your arms. Megumi held a picnic basket in his free hand, filled with all of the food you had packed for your picnic date. 

When you found an open spot on the grass, you spread the blanket out and unpacked the food that you and Megumi had prepared before walking to the park: two bentos, some sandwiches, some onigiri, and some cut fruit. As you sat down on the blanket, you opened your bento, breathing in the crisp autumn air. Megumi sat down beside you, grabbing his own bento. After a few bites, you leaned your head against his shoulder, sighing contentedly.

“Yooo! Fushiguro! L/N!” 

You turned around to see Itadori, Kugisaki, and Gojo approaching you. You gave them a small wave as Megumi sighed out of annoyance.

“We finally found you two love birds~!” Gojo-sensei sang, wrapping his arms around you two.

“Why are you here?” Megumi asked, clearly irritated.

“We wanted to hang out with you guys, of course!” Yuji exclaimed as he passed Nobara a sandwich, trying to find something in the basket for him to eat.

Megumi rolled his eyes, watching them rummage through the food. You rubbed the back of his hand with your thumb, looking at him with a small smile on your face. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled quietly.

“For what?”

“Our date’s ruined,” he stated as if it was obvious.

“What? I don’t think our date’s ruined,” you commented. “We can have some more time to ourselves later!”

You gave him a big smile, to which his eyes softened, turning back to his friends. You leaned your head back on his shoulder as you watched your friends and your teacher now fighting over who should get which onigiri.

“No, I want the tuna mayo one!” Yuji whined, holding the rice ball to his chest protectively.

“Come one, Itadori! Be a gentleman and give it here!” Nobara yelled, trying to grab the rice ball.

“But your sensei always works so hard to teach you all! I think I should get the tuna mayo!” Gojo whined, sounding even more childish than the students half his age.

As Megumi sat down in the chair across from you, you opened your book, ready for a quiet library date with him. 

The two of you had made library dates a weekly occurrence, hoping to find some peace in the chaos that made up your lives as sorcerers. 

As you read on, you kicked your feet a little, sipping on a cup of hot chocolate that Megumi had bought for you on your way to the library. The liquid’s warmth spread throughout your body, extending to your fingers and your nose, almost making you feel drowsy.

The silence between you and your boyfriend was comforting, so pleasant after a week filled with training and fighting cursed spirits. 

After a couple hours however, your hot chocolate wasn’t nearly as hot anymore, the silence between Megumi and you felt deafening, and you couldn’t read through a paragraph without having to read it 5 times over. Your eyelids felt heavy as you lightly kicked Megumi’s foot, signalling for his attention.

His eyes shot up to meet your gaze, finding you in your tired state.

“‘Wanna go home ‘gumi…” you yawned, rubbing your eyes.

Without saying a word, Megumi closed his book as well as yours, stowing them away in his backpack. 

As you stood up, you stretched your legs and arms out. You felt sore all around your body for sitting down in a strained position for so long.

Grabbing your bag and his, Megumi hooked his pinky with yours before heading home.

Tonight was finally Friday night, a night when you and Megumi rarely had anything to do but to spend time with each other in your dorms. 

“There you go!” you beamed as you smoothed a face mask over Megumi’s skin. He was wearing a fluffy headband to match yours as well as a pair of bunny slippers you had bought for him. 

Despite doing this with you every week, Megumi made a weird face at the uncomfortable feeling of the mask on his face.

You giggled, as you snuggled up next to him, turning on a K-Drama to watch together.

“This guy is so stupid, he needs to confess to her already!” you groaned at the end of the episode. “Anyway, it’s time to take of our face masks!”

As you peeled away your face mask, you rubbed the extra serum into your face, doing the same for Megumi. “You’re such a pretty boy,” you mumbled with a smile.

Megumi blushed at your words, looking away. You laughed at his shyness, pressing play on the next episode.

Snuggling back into his side, you continued to complain about how you were getting impatient with the love interest. “It’s been like, 12 episodes now!”

Megumi listened while he brushed his fingers through your hair, giving your head light scratches. You didn’t even notice until half an episode later that he had fallen asleep.

You exhaled through your nose, a small smile creeping up on your face. You took his headband off and pulled the covers over the two of you. After closing the lid of your laptop, you tossed it to the side and gave your boyfriend a quick peck on the cheek.

“G’night Megs…” you mumbled into his neck before the sound of his steady breathe and the warmth of his skin lulled you to sleep.

BONUS:

“Yuji! Come look at this!” you heard Nobara whisper as you started to wake up.

“Whatwhatwhat!”

A camera shuttered as you started to open your eyes. “...What time is it?” you mumbled sleepily, raising your head.

“Oh shit! Shit!” Yuji whisper-yelled before hurriedly shutting the door.

“...hm?” Megumi groaned, shifting beneath you. “Y/N?”

“It’s nothing Megs, go back to sleep.”

NOTES: fjdksal;fjskda this one was so late oml

anyways have a nice day cutie <33

dividers: @cafekitsune

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[mobbu-min]

☆ bragging rights ☆

(ft the first years)

a/n I couldn't find the request where they wanted the first years, but here it is! Ortho is strictly platonic!

tw cursing

want more? eat up bestie! ☆,☆

Ace + Grim <3

⋆ Grim’s like, ‘No. Please, Great Sevens, no…’ He wants anyone but him. Grim wouldn’t mind if it was one of the Leech Brothers, or hell even, that weird ass bowl cut kid that tried to light everything on fire. Just anyone but Ace! He can’t! Just imagining Ace’s cocky ass grin sends Grim into a fit of rage. Really considers all his life decisions.

⋆ Ehm, can you please speak a little louder? Ace didn’t hear that. Ace squeals like a high school girl who just got asked to prom. Considers this his greatest accomplishment tbh. You’re the hottest thing since sliced bread and Ace is the super cool, incredibly good looking super mage. Like it’s a no brainer. A match made in heaven. Of course you’re going to be bragging about him. Who wouldn’t? (please, never stop. Ace literally cried tears of joy)

Deuce + Grim <3

⋆ Honestly, Grim’s okay with this one. Sure Deuce is a little airheaded, but Grim likes him a lot more than Ace! (that’s a lie, he loves both of them equally, just too stubborn to admit it) And he knows that Deuce will treat you right. Though, Grim doesn't know much more arguing he can take from the flustered idiot one and jealous idiot two. 

⋆ So so happy. He calls his mom immediately after, (i mean, he’s been calling his mom about you since the day you met) Deuce has really tried to be better, to be the type of guy that you wouldn’t hesitate to call yours and knowing that he made it makes him want to explode (in a good way ofc) He wants to cry, jump up and down, take you by your waist and give you a big ol’ smooch. There’s so many things he wants to do, so many things he wants to make you feel, because Deuce is so in love it’s embarrassing really. (Ace gags while also mourning the fact that it’s not him, jealous bastard)

Jack + Grim <3

⋆ Grim is a little on the fence about this one. Jacks a great guy, don’t get him wrong, but Grim doesn’t want to spend his mornings, afternoons and nights working out. Well, on second thought, the image of Grim sporting a rocking six pack kinda gets him to rethink….No, no…he does not want to give up his tuna! Jack will have to pry his box of tuna from his cold dead paws before he lets that happen. 

⋆ His tail does a little waggy once he hears you bragging. Like how can he not? He already talks about you a whole bunch. I mean if you count him always going ‘C’mon, even the prefect could do better!’ or ‘you might be even more airheaded then the Prefect…” then yeah, Jack’s doing a lot of bragging. He’s loyal by heart, but also emotionally constipated, so you’re going to have to look for the hidden meanings behind his brash words. Because it’s there! You just have to look hard and be patient!

⋆ Or you can just look behind your wolfy friend and stare at that ass- I mean, that tail! Yeah, tail! Because it’s betraying how he feels. So thank you tail! (and thank that ass, because it’s thiccc!)

Epel + Grim <3

⋆ Grim is honestly okay with this one. Epel and him are on good terms. So it doesn’t bother him all that much. Really there's nothing else to say other than, Grim is just happy that you’re happy.

⋆ YEEHAW BITCHES!!!!!HE WINS!!!!! Epel is alive and dying at the same time. He’s calling his meemaw, peepaw and all that jazz, because guess what? He’s not bitchless anymore! Yes! Take that Vil, you pompous jerk! And you too Rook, you frenchie! And most importantly, fuck you Ace! He beat you and now you look like a fool! HAHDHHAHA

⋆ Okay, but after Epel gets over his high, he’s face down on his apple plushies practically crying because he’s so happy. 

Ortho + Grim <3

⋆ Second son? SECOND SON? NAH! GRIM’S IS YOUR ONLY SON! He literally gets so offended that you're talking about Ortho more than him. Every little ounce of affection or praise directed towards you little robotic buddy is greeted with an irritated huff and eye roll from Grim. Like did you forget that Grim’s been with you since forever? Grim truly see’s Ortho as a rival/threat, because unlike the other boys who you continuously thrist over, you’re so sweet and kind to Ortho and treat him like he was your kid/brother. It really gets Grim’s gears going. He just wants you to know that he is not above fighting a child, robotic or not, he’s going down.

⋆ Oh, Ortho’s over the moon. The person he sees as a second sibling loves him so much! It makes him so happy. Literally, he thinks he’s dreaming (can he dream?). And omg, this just fuels Ortho to get Idia to confess to you, so you’re all like an actual family. You and Idia can be the parents and Ortho and Grim can be your kids! Ortho has already taken to treating Grim like a little brother, constantly patting his head and giving him treats (which does soothes Grim’s dislike to him by a lot, at this point you think Grim likes Ortho more than you) Ortho does ask if you four could all take a christmas photo together (or whatever the equivalent to christmas is in their world) and he sends it to every one of his friends with really fancy blue and pink glitter gel pen font that says ‘From the Shrouds!’. Sure he knows you aren’t actually a family yet, but he’s sure he can do a little convincing and bam! The wedding is bound to happen! 

Please just do as he says! Let this boy be happy T0T

Sebek + Grim <3

⋆ There’s dead silence from Grim. Like you do realize that you have no insurance right? How the heck are you supposed to pay for hearing aids for the both of you? He doesn’t get it. What’s the appeal? Did you hit your head that hard? Grim’s judging and he’s judging hard. But overall, Grim surprisingly feels bad. All he can think of is that one lyric you scream out every now then by that Rana le Del, um… What was it again? The Other Woman~ and that’s you. He just shakes his head because he knows you can do better. 

⋆ Sebek is a blushing mess. He’s on two ends of the spectrum, one being incredibly smug and two, wanting to scream the ears off anyone in the ten mile radius of him. There is no inbetween because he’s not a chill guy. When Sebek wants something he puts 110 percent into it. And that's what he does for you. You know what name becomes a frequent occurrence in his vocabulary? Yeah, it’s your name. There’s not a sentence that he says that does include you and Malleus in it. Yeah, he is making and joining every club that there is about you and yes, that is a shrine dedicated to you right next to his Malleus shrine. And no, you cannot stop him. 

[ferigrieving]

sanctum.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ in which you and inumaki toge find refuge in a hole in the wall bookstore

absentmindedly fliping through the pages of a book you didnt care about, you leaned back against the bookshelf behind you, the only light source in the aisle threatening to give way. 

the book in of itself was on an interesting topic, but you had already read everything that was to be read on house plants, as if there was much to read on it anyways. you had only picked it up because the cover looked interesting in a sense, and the pages were worn, smelling of mildew and coffee, or  perhaps that was the whole bookstore in of itself, you thought.

it was a rare off day for you and the rest of the students at jujutsu tech, and while the others

took the oppurtunity to rest and sleep, you had instantly made your way to the hole in the wall bookstore you had seen a few times on missions. 

it was snowing outside, and paired with the dim lighting and a faint DEVO song playing from your the radio somewhere, you hummed along with it, enjoying the quiet moment.

'crassula ovata'. the jade plant. running your finger over the words, you hummed. it was a common  plant, the first indoor one you had ever gotten, and it could last generations if cared for properly.

you always wanted a big jade plant, one that you could prune and use the cuttings to make new ones, maybe to give to friends. but even after four years, after all the new plants had grown and grown, the jade plant you had gotten has only sprouted a few new branches.

you wondered if you had watered yours recently, and looked up to put the book back on the shelf, only to be met with a  certain white haired friend of yours.

"kelp." you could see the corners of his eyes crinkle up in a smile as you nudged him out of the way,  attempting once more to place the book back in its proper place, only to watch him take the book right out of your hands.

you huffed and rolled your eyes playfully as you watched him flip through the pages,afraid the pages would come right out of the binding the way he was handling it. he stopped

on a specific page, pointing at it and looking up at you. "tuna mayo ?"

"philodendron.. gloriosum?" you read, moving to stand behind him to read what he was looking at. the picture of the philodendron took up nearly the whole page, the text around it being nearly indecipherable over years of wear and misuse.

inumaki didnt strike you as a plant person, but now, watching his finger dance around pages and pages of the care of houseplants, it made so much more sense. 

watching him flip to different pages, he began pointing to different plants. looking up at you with excitment. "dracaena trifascita, aspidistra elatior, philodendron cordatum..." you look at him in what could only hope is surprise, maybe horror, as he reads off the different house plants, finger dancing across the page.

you knew inumaki only spoke in onigiri ingridents to protect the people around him, as the words held no meaning in the big picture, and could be used as freely as he wanted. only during missions and the sister games had you heard him say anything else, commands to "plummet." or "run away."

yet, here you were, in a dingy old bookstore, watching him eagerly read off house plants from a  rotting book. something you knew other people wouldnt experience, something you werent even

sure you were experiencing.

maybe its the black mold, you thought distractedly.

leaving him to his own minstrations to process everything, you did another lap around the whole of  the bookstore, the books that you had picked up held haphazardly in one arm. you were too stubborn to get a basket, a surrender to the fact that you had maybe spent too much on books again.

 its not  ike you come here often, or could ever again, and it seemed that you and inumaki were the only two customers in  the whole store, so it felt justified in the sense that you were supporting a small business. 

you found yourself in the poetry aisle once again, eyes scanning for anything of worth. you had been on the lookout for some books that you could read in the cold weather, and had struck gold, arms full of donna tartt and a few penguin's classics. you hoped to find a book by one of those poets you had heard of in passing from megumi, the one about the bug or whatever.

turning back to start at the beginning, you were once again face to face with inumaki, sifting through the pages of a large book that looked like it had been through the two world wars. you figured that the book was originally white at some point, but now it was yellowing and peeling, even under the multiple layers of plastic protecting it.

glancing at the cover you sighed, looking up at inumaki who you could tell was laughing, and had only probaly picked it up to piss you off. 

"the metamorphosis. really, toge ?" you rolled your eyes, a grin creeping across your face under your scarf.

after asking inumaki where he picked it up, he pointed right behind him and you sighed again, realizing that what you were looking for was in front of you the whole time as you picked up 

another one of his books. something about letters to someone, you couldnt read the cursive on the cover that was torn in multiple places, making it hard to even put together what it was supposed to look like in the first place.

you looked on the back, hoping to find a short summary on the book you held, but was only met with disappointment as you came face to face with an assortment of reviews and opinons on people you could never care about. rolling your eyes and balancing it on the stack of books you held in your  arms, you began making your way to where you thought the cashier was, only to end up lost.

after a few minutes of walking around again (and a small art book from the free basket) you found yourself in front of the cashier, praying to god knows who that you wouldnt have to do the walk of shame if you didnt have enough money. 

fidgeting with the tamagotchi on your belt loop, you felt what you assumed to be inumaki lean over and hand the cashier a 500 yen coin,  mumbling a "tuna mayo." as he patted you on the back and dropped the book he wanted to buy on the counter with yours.

you thanked the cashier and stuffed all the books in your satchel, but not before taking one of the free bookmarks that came with every purchase. you dully noted he had gotten the houseplant book that you had been reading when he found you as you walked out of the store behind inumaki.

while inside the bookstore, it seemed that nither of you had noticed how heavy the snow had gotten, wrapping your scarf around your mouth tighter as you looked at your classmate questiongly. 

you wanted to try the boba store that you saw on the way, so you tugged on inumaki's jacket to ask if he wantedto come with you. 

you got the impression that he was about to ask you too, because as soon as you mentioned it,  you watched his eyes light up and nod, a quiet "salmon!" heard behind his scarf. you raced him the short distance to the cafe, and he held open the door for you as you playfully flipped him off for winning.

the cafe was small and homely, and you understood now why it was right next to the bookstore.

books and plants covered nearly every surface, ambient lighting illuminating the whole shop a muted orange. standing in front of the cash register, you smiled as you read the names of the various drinks, promising that you would try one next time even though you knew you would order the same thing every time, at every store that served boba.

"whatcha gettin', inumaki ?" you nudged him with your elbow, glancing over to see him thinking way too hard over a boba order. he pulled out a pen and wrote 'thai tea with lychee jelly?' on  his hand. you had always wondered how inumaki ordered food, but felt it was too personal to ask.

you hummed and rung the bell at the counter, biting your tongue as an employee that looked no older than 17 rushed to the front, rubbing the back of their head apologetically. you had never seen an employee older than 25 at any cafe you had ever been to, and you supposed you never would.

"one large brown sugar milk tea, light ice, and one large thai tea with lychee  jelly please?" you averted your eyes as you spoke, mumbling your name when asked and paying quickly. you hated ordering, but its not like inumaki could do it without causing a problem.

as soon as you set your bag down on one of the window tables, both of your drinks were delivered, and you thanked the employee as they quickly retreated into the back room again. careful not to  rip the bottom of the cup again, you stabbed the cap of the drink carefully, watching the colours swirl around.

"yours is real pretty," you commented, the bright pink drink in inumaki's hand making you 

giggle as he drank. he didnt say anything, just narrowing his eyes and smiling, before suddenly  picking yours up and taking a sip out of it.

he dramatically gagged, putting down the drink and pushing it towards you like it was some sort of poison. "caviar," he choked out, downing half of his milk tea in an attempt to wash out the

taste of your drink. you laughed at his whole sphiel, sipping yours and grinning. "that bad huh ?" he flipped you off and finished the rest of his drink, wiping his mouth with a hankerchief and laying his head down on the table to watch the snow outside. you hummed, playing with one of your rings as you drank, staring out the window along with him.

 it wasnt often it snowed in tokyo, and when it did, you wanted to spend hours just watching it if you could. the snowflakes had gotten bigger since you two had entered the cafe, forgotten christmas lights twinkling from the restuarant across from you.

when you looked back, you watched with mild disdain as inumaki rummaged through your bag, pulling out his book and smiling at you sheepishly as he pulled his scarf and mask back up. 

he flipped through the pages quickly, seeming to be looking for something specific. "crassula ovata." he read, flipping the book over to show you and point to it, then pulling out  his phone to show you a picture of what you assume to be his room, a lone jade plant sitting on his nightstand, leggy and clearly underwatered

 you choked on a piece of boba as you tried not to laugh, slapping a hand over your mouth in attempt not to spit all over him. he fought a smile and flipped  you off again, mumbling a "caviar." as he shut the book and shoved it back into your bag.

"hey ! i didnt mean it like that, okay ?" you tried, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and turning away from him to laugh. "it just.. caught me off guard? i dont know." inumaki made a 'blah blah blah' guesture towards you, rolling his eyes as he stared out the window again. you sighed and finished the rest of your drink, standing up and asking him if he was ready to go.

untying the cat ear beanie you had dangling from the carabiner on your bag, you put it on and ventured back out into the snow, pulling your scarf around your face tighter in an attempt not to freeze to death. holding an arm out to inumaki, you two walked through the snow together, footsteps horrifically out of sync as he wanted to start running again, and you felt too tired to even walk.

while crossing the croswalk, you tripped on your untied shoelace and brought inumaki with you,  laughing as he pulled you along just out of harms away. as inumaki dropped your body on the sidewalk, you knelt down to tie your boots, gloveless hands shaking from the cold. 

as you moved to retie the other shoe as a 'just in case', you felt a cold, blunt, object hit the side of your face and slide down to cover the shoe. you looked at inumaki, holding three snowballs in his arms, the corners of his eyes crinkled in a smile as he launched another one straight to your face.

shooting straight up, you wiped the snow off your face and began chasing him and screaming, scraping off excess snow from windowsills you pass to make your own snowball.

in contrast to the now six snowballs inumaki held in his arms and ocassionally threw back at you clumsily, you only had one, large snowball, and the sole intent of slam dunking it on the white haired sorcerer. he had looked back to throw a snowball at your leg, and in turn tripped on an elevated grate, and you took this oppurtunity to catch up, kicking him back down as gently as you could to immobilize him.

lifting the snowball above your head, you laughed along with inumaki, but before you could bring it down, a loud "explode!" caused the snowball to knock you back from the force of the immidiate dissipation, followed by inumaki's loud laughs.

you sighed and covered your eyes with one arm, grinning as you both lay there, covered in snow, in the middle of a random sidewalk a ways away from where you two were supposed to be.

[ctitan98official]

Y/N coming home after hanging out with the Dimitrescu sisters

Y/N: *Opens the door to Alcina’s bedroom, covered in cuts, bruises, and bug bites*

Y/N: Alci! I’m home!

Alcina: *Comes in to see Y/N, gasps when she sees they’re injured* My love! What happened to you?

Alcina: *Sits down with Y/N and starts tending to their wounds*

Y/N: No big deal, babe! The girls and I were just roughhousing, that’s all. *Scratching the hell out of their arms and legs* 

Y/N: Damn! These skeeters tearin’ me up!

Alcina: *Gently bats Y/N’s hands away* Don’t scratch those bites, draga! You’ll only make it worse. *Finishes fixing Y/N up, kisses their head, goes to her desk* Now, go get ready for dinn-

Y/N: *Literally sitting on the floor and scratching their head with their foot like a dog*

Alcina: Y/N! What did I just say! *Does the mom pose with her hands on her hips*

Y/N: *Nervous laughter* Hehe… sorry, babe!

Alcina: *Unimpressed* I can see this is going to be a problem. CASSSANDRAAA!

Cass: *Buzzes in* Yes, Mother?

Alcina: Cassandra, be a dear and fetch me those ugly mittens Mother Miranda got you for Christmas last year.

Cass: The ones that say “Grandma Loves Me” on them?

Alcina: *Pinching the bridge of her nose* Yes.

Cass: ??? Okay… *Swarms off and brings them to Alcina*

Alcina: *Takes them from Cass* Perfect. Now, grab Y/N.

Y/N: Wait, wha-

Cass: *Puts Y/N in a chokehold while Alcina grabs some tape from her desk*

Y/N: *Struggling* Wait! What are you gonna do?!

Alcina: *Puts the mittens on Y/N and tapes them on securely* I’ll not have you scratching like some filthy, mangy animal in my castle. Plus… I’d hate to see all this perfect skin get scarred…

Cass: *Retches and flies off*

Y/N: *Completely dumbfounded by this betrayal* You… are an evil woman!

Alcina: *Smirks, amused* You love it.

That night

Alcina: *Wakes up to a weird noise and feeling on her left hand, switches on the lamp next to the bed*

Y/N: *Using Alcina’s claws as a back scratcher and groaning from relief*

Alcina: *Rips her hand away from Y/N, outraged* Y/N! What do you think you’re doing!

Y/N: *Pouting and crossing their arms* Using you as a backscratcher… You should be flattered, babe! You give the best scritches!

Alcina: *Confused* Did I fall asleep with my claws out? I think I would have noticed…

Y/N: No. I made them come out!

Alcina: *Shocked* What?! How did you do that?!

Y/N: *Shrugs* You have this spot on your neck that I press and they come out. One time when you fell asleep in your dress, I tried to take off your necklace and damn near chopped my head off.

Alcina: …

Y/N: One time I used them to open a can of tuna! :D

Alcina: Every day, it gets harder and harder to go on…

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