iraprince · 3 months ago
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if u like listening to music while u work but find urself getting distracted fiddling with queueing stuff/finding The Perfect Playlist/etc my recent hack has been just throwing on youtube videos of dj sets
book club radio is a good channel to start w bc they usually have the overall Vibe of the set in the title (i.e. "dreamy pop mix", "energetic techno mix" etc) so u can pick the general tempo or w/e u want but then it just kind of blends into the bg and u can set it + forget it
any time i put my own playlists on i'm just too familiar w what could be coming up and i end up wasting so much time skipping/scrolling 2 look for specific songs and stuff. dj sets are like putting a post-op doggy cone on me. it;'s out of my hands
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bmpmp3 · 3 months ago
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UNTUNED and barely mixed wip of cover #5986304534948053425433 i am working on, another one with genby, ,, benbu.,,, benby,,.... bgbgbgbbgbgbgbgbg lite (passes away forever)
song is Watashi to Aruite iru to Hazukashii no by watashinokoko (offvocal in desc) and here's the program files if u want em HOPEFULLY i have not made any lyric mistakes. hopefully
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malikselfindulgence · 1 year ago
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💌 + Grapefruitshipping my beloveds!!
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King of "if my gf were wrong I'd simply reshape reality to make her correct" BWHEHW TY SO MUCH FOR THE ASK!!! :3
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devllipriv · 11 months ago
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wrapped :3
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also here's my top 100 songs:
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avianhaven · 2 years ago
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Started listening to ichiko aoba again and ugh I missed her. Love the part in that one 10 min song that's just like extended noises of bats for 2 minutes.
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nadianova · 2 months ago
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how i do my visual novel filtered photo backgrouds
ive had some questions about this so i figured i'd put together a quick post on my process and what goes into it.
this isnt really a tutorial and instead is just a ramble of how i do stuff with a ton of examples and pictures lol
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read more below. this is a long post and you probably want to be looking at these images on your computer instead of your phone
step one is that i find CC0 photos or otherwise easy licenses to use because I'm lazy and don't want to have a list of credits of random photographers caue i used one of their images but also i don't want to use stuff without crediting
because they have a general lincese that just wants you to mention the site i prefer unsplash or pixabay but there's other public domain type photo sites too obviously
so like okay heres a random picture
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i have a photoshop CS5 from 10 years ago. but these can be done with gimp or krita and whatever. theres even photopea that has photoshop in the browser
basic stuff is that i start by cropping my bg into my renpy resolution (i use 1920x1080) this is also the part where sometimes i might rotate a bg. it is a good way to add some chaos vibes to a scene
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i tend to add some mild blur effect since i find that having too sharp photos as backgrounds clashes with the artstyle of my sprites. like just a couple pixels worth of blur tends to do it
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the next part is called fuck around and find out
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i like to play with the values to just get random results. hue/saturation for tinting the picture, messing with the curves to get some really sharp effects, or channel mixer to add more of a color
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this part is just purely vibes based but i personally think reducing the colors of the background is the simplest way to create something that feels coherent. especially if you make backgrounds based on moods. like having a blue tinted bedroom vs a red tinted one really changes the atmosphere
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you can get some pretty intense effects but its always important to remember that its meant to be a background and there's a risk it distracts from the sprites
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in this case im not including the effect for the curves. after the colours look fine the final step i tend to have is apply some sort of effect.
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i really like changing the colour mode to indexed colour since i like crunchy pixels. (had to zoom in to 100% to show the actual effect) downside of indexed is that it doesn't look ideal unless its displayed in the exact resolution it was made in but i like it
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here is the images before indexed mode:
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after indexed mode(i think you have to click the image and open it in full to see the actual effect):
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another thing ive been playing with recently has been grain+chromatic aberration combo. it makes things feel surprisingly lively with just this simple thing so you'll probably see me overusing this effect in the future
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you have to mess with the numbers to get the effect you want but for me these were the parameters I've been using
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ignore the preview missing idk why it does that.
heres the image (the non indexed version) after these krita effects
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one random special mention i have is that playing with layer blend modes is great
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in this example i just copied the same background, mirrored it horizontally and set the layer blend mode to color and it lowered the layer opacity slightly. it just adds some.... idk what to call it visual noise? itj just fucks it up a bit. i used overlapping images and screen modes in some of the hopeless junction images i did for some pretty nice effects
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i dont really know waht the blend modes do i just scroll until something looks good lmao
theres a ton you can do with these. like for example just adding a single air brush dot of a bright color on a separate layer and setting it to some blend mode to add a tint to a background
i used these both in malmaid and in the second one i just brushed on some color on a separate layer to give it a moodier vibe
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i think having variations of the same background is an extremely easy way to add some life to the bgs without having to do new stuff. like here was the hotel lobby when entering, and here is the hotel lobby when they ran away from the place. i added a radial blur with photoshop
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i think theres some beaty in artifacts that come from low resolution images too. sometimes i intentionally use images that have clear compression artifacts cause i think it looks neat. i don't really worry about the details too much as the vibe is the most important thing
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its honestly just a matter of knowing these tools exist and just fidgeting around with combinations to find what you want. it also helps to look at other backgrounds or images in general that you come across and just be curious. how was this done? how could i recreate it? that's the type of experimenting that has led me to these.
idk thats all i have to say. ty for reading and play malmaid on steam like and subscribe for more gay puppies
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cheseely · 11 months ago
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Hi, I'm sure you get this often but I really love your recent genshin artwork, do you think you could explain your painting process? I love the colouring effect in that piece especially. Thank you.
Thank you so much! I got a few messages like this from my previous piece (thank you guys for the staff pick & blaze btw, I really didn't expect all the support😭) so I thought I'd share a bit of my process below as thanks.
I always do my lineart first because it feels less daunting to me when applying colours. I will do some rough colours first so I can easily adjust it to my liking.
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Next, I make sure to separate each character into different layers when I clean it up. I like to work one character or object at a time, it's less overwhelming for me that way, and I can use clipping masks for ease of rendering.
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I'll usually apply some adjustment layers on top of the base layer for shadows and highlights. When I say base layer, I just mean a layer of the colour without any effects.
I like using 'hard light' for shadows, and 'screen' for highlights, but you can really use whatever clicks with you.
Rinse & repeat this process for every character in the illustration. Note that I make Furina the focus so everything behind her will be less rendered than the elements in front of them (Neuvillette is a lot less rendered compared to Furina, and the painting in the back barely has much shading).
Once I render out each asset in the illustration and add shadows & highlights to my liking, I then to merge foreground/ midground/ background elements so I can make the overall illustration clearer to read. I don't want it to feel messy or overcrowded, and I think it's easy to get tunnel-visioned in small details and lose the clarity of the entire illustration.
Make sure to zoom out constantly and make your illustration B&W to check the values to see if the drawing is clear.
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I created a simple S curve with the values for readability, and have the foreground elements have darker values & contrasts.
As for the BG, I wanted to add more textures into the drawing, particularly the painting in the back. Here's an image of it when I only added in the base colours.
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I use the smudge tool to create more texture once I fill in the base colours. Since I don't really 'paint' anything with the textures in, I just put in the base colours and take a textured brush to smudge it. However, over-smudging can lose the painterly texture I want, so I usually smudge vertically or horizontally in a single stroke to create a sense of movement.
Another thing to note is that I only textured the BG, I thought it would help it blend into the background a bit better. I usually wouldn't do this for the foreground because I want those elements to be clearer.
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At the very end, I tend to spend a fair bit of time just fiddling with more adjustment layers, various filters (such as blur, or noise), or liquify small details to really finalize the piece. Just vibes...basically this is me
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Anyway, I hope that was helpful & it made sense!! Feel free to message me if you have any other questions & I'll try my best to answer! I might've glazed over a lot since I didn't wanna make this too long.
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unboundprompts · 1 year ago
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Cavetown Prompts
➢ writing prompts from Cavetown songs. feel free to edit as you see fit.
"She's so in love with all the things I hate most about myself." - Banana Bread
"It doesn't make you a narcissist to love yourself." - Talk To Me
"Nobody gets exactly what they want." - Calpol
"I'll stay strong for you." - Pigeon
"I was such a fool to keep on chasing after nothing great." - Fool
"Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love; but I guess this avoids the stress of falling out of it." - This Is Home
"I just want you to be okay." - Psychometry
"Don't worry, we'll find another way out." - It's U
"Tell me about the things that you love." - Hug All Ur Friends
"I know there's good in everything." - Taking Care of Things
"I hope you feel happy, that's all I want." - Green
"You don't have to be a hero to save the world." - Talk To Me
"All I wanna do is quit." - Boys Will Be Bugs
"When the sun dies none of this will matter half as much as you thought." - Calpol
"I am not a beast, I'm not a monster." - Pigeon
"The longer I sleep, the slower my heart beats." - We're Alive
"I need you to stay." - Psychometry
"You don't have to be a prodigy to be unique." - Talk To Me
"His mind is in a different place." - This Is Home
"Sticks and stones they say, but we don't have bones inside our brains." - Everything Is Temporary
"Did you know that every night I play your favorite songs on repeat?" - Untitled V.2
"I need to cry but I can't." - Juliet
"Why do I let myself dream like this?" - Meteor Shower
"I guess it's just another one of those nights." - It's U
"I like your voice." - Fool
"I saw a girl in my dreams but I don't remember her name." - Another One of Those Days
"If I don't do anything, is it my fault?" - Taking Care of Things
"Will you even remember me?" - It's U
"What's the point if we can't be friends?" - I'll Make Cereal
"Didn't give me time to say goodbye in the way that I wanted to." - Pigeon
"I'm staying the same as if I was nothing." - We're Alive
"The sky looks like it's burning down." - Hazel
"I know my hands aren't warm enough to hold your cold heart." - Untitled V.2
"Time doesn't matter." - Night Knuckles
"I don't mind if you find someone better than me." - BG Noise
"It isn't good to stay in bed all day." - Psychometry
"My worries are far too selfish, I can't let you know."- So Much
"One day we'll all be underground." - Snake & the Prairie dogs
"I put a box in my closet full of things that I've loved." - Irrational
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w0rmdahl · 5 months ago
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are you listening? — SKNS
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gif ©: w0rmdahl, madsofrps-blog
show: skins s1 (2007-2008)
synopsis: joey may have fallen first, but love fell on anwar.
word count: 4.1k
featuring: anwar kharral, (oc) joey park, maxxie oliver, mention of jal fazer, mention of tony stonem
warnings: (it's skins yk) strong language, sex, early 2000s
a/n: so much to say about this piece omg. check the replies for everything i have to tell you guys lol (p.s. i think swear i can write in present-ish tense but i can't begin without the bg set up womp womp)
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next-door neighbors turned childhood best friends, anwar and joey were widely regarded (at least by the 13 people who knew them) as two peas in a pod; an inseparable duo that always happened to be together even when they weren't really supposed to. most — if not all parent-teacher conferences were chalk-full of complaints about their inability to stop talking to the other, and numerous family gatherings had been defined by the odd man out chatting happily as usual with their other half — their other half being a spikey haired anwar standing significantly shorter than he was now or the brace-faced joey who'd refused to make eye contact with anyone else.
over the near-seventeen years they were friends so tightly knit you couldn't even fit a coin between them, joey and anwar had obviously encountered their fair share of pros and cons that came with the territory. on one hand, they always got away with whatever mischievous schemes they'd come up with because no one ever expected them to be in on it together. however, the most pressing issue by far had always been the dating allegations.
for a long time even the mention of romantic feelings lingering around had them up in arms, vehemently denying the allegations with an iron fist as they cited how ridiculous it was to assume just because they were a boy and a girl. and though they began this uphill battle before even reaching double digits, the accusations would only grow worse the older they got and the further into their friendship they ventured.
anwar had always been the very first to deny, always saying the same thing; "you're sick and perverted, joey's my best mate! she's not even like a girl to me!" and for some reason young joey always found this to be hilarious. nowadays, however, not as funny. actually a little hurtful to be completely honest, but she knew why.
the god-honest truth was; joey had loved anwar since the start. she grew up with the hopeless gnawing of yearn at her fingertips, familiar with the fungus-like growth of blush on her cheeks as they walked home from school or shared a cigarette under the stars. she'd spent years tossing restlessly in bed every night in an attempt to tune out the annoying hum in her chest until it eventually became nothing more than white noise in her ears — somewhat manageable but still tender like a bruise when pressed.
by 14 she had figured out a way to better conceal the jealousy that bubbled inside whenever he drooled over the nearest being with boobs, that is, until she found herself whining under the covers like a sick dog. by 15 she finally came to terms with the fact that he'd never even look in her direction with romance in mind, and by her 16th birthday spent with the blubbering drunk, joey finally put the hopes of ‘something more’ to rest as she fell asleep with his elbow dug into her ribs and a lump of acceptance in her throat.
on the contrary, however, anwar was not afforded the luxury of carefully unraveling the warmth in his chest until the burden met his open palms. no — unlike joey's lifelong pining, poor dear anwar happened to be speaking with maxxie when the realization fell on top of him like bricks squashing a bug.
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"i just — i don't get it! why does she do that?" he huffed before taking another swig of whatever liquor it was that they'd found at the park, sat leaned against his bed with the absence of her fairy lights reflecting into his window further grating his tender feelings. "of course i don't want to hear about some wanker trying to chat her up! that's disgusting!"
maxxie almost laughs at him, though he refrains. "oh, come on, anwar. you know joey's like mother teresa, i bet she didn't even let him dream about it. is it really that big of an issue?"
"it is! because now i have the image of this bloke shoving his tongue down her throat and if i think about it any longer i'm gonna spew!"
now pausing to catch the sad-faced-clowns gaze, maxxie snatched the bottle from him before shrugging, voice small like he already knew what would come next. "well..." he hummed, "have you ever thought about telling her?"
the aforementioned clowns eyebrows furrowed together. "telling her what?"
"come on, an, it's obvious. i've seen how you look at her. you'll never know until you give it a shot."
at first, anwar would fully brush him off. "maxxie," he'd say with the disapproval already written in his grimace "it's not like that — it's never been like that. i've never even thought of joey like that." but when his stripe-wearing friend finally went home and left him all alone to mull over their conversation, poor dear anwar would think of her like that. he'd find himself in a similar position that night, unbeknownst to either parties, curled into a ball under the covers as he clutched at his chest almost like he was ready to rip the frantic heart right out.
as jal would say months after this initial incident; "joey may have fallen in love first, but love fell on anwar." she was right, as always, but this wouldn't come to fruition until a period of continuous push-and-pulls between them.
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of course, the days and weeks following proceeded as typical as usual; anwar and joey hung out for the majority of the day, partied on the weekends, found themselves waking up a tangled mess on the floor surrounded by the rest of the gang covered in a typical amount of vomit. nothing significant immediately changed — much to his dismay — but instead it seemed as though a list of strange circumstances added up over time to grow into the change they both so desperately longed for.
first it was anwar. joey noticed only a few days after he'd originally got upset with her that he started accommodating her more — at least more than usual. it started with the bag of chips they'd bought to share between their parallel windows. usually he'd try to convince her not to get the spicy chips due to the fact that it always ended with tears, but on this fateful day, anwar picked her absolute favorite without so much as a flinch before paying for it himself.
it didn't strike her as exceptionally abnormal until she finished her drink without realizing and was yet again left sniffling, eyes wet as she reached over the gap to hand it back to him with dust-covered fingers. he'd resume leaning against the window frame in search for his drink to hand over only to turn back and find her with a thumb between her lips, tears dripping down her pink cheeks. she laughed.
"they're just so good."
joey would wait for her expected response, something along the lines of 'you're a monster/addict/freak,' only to have his dumb grin be the entire response. she could see his gaze surveying her warm face before fixing on her eyes and staying there, utterly unmoving until she'd grumble.
"just say 'told you so' or something! don't make me stew in it."
anwar was careful not to stare for too long after that, he knew she didn't like feeling 'seen' anyway. but you'd best believe he was studying her features every time she wasn't looking, skin so much softer and lips so much rosier now that he saw her in the new light. he could've sworn she existed solely in a hazy glow colored by every new feature he witnessed pulling him in deeper. if only he could reach out to make sure — to check and see if she was really as radiant as he'd observed. how didn't he notice it before?
it would get to a point that, on a foggy drunken night, anwar would reach out to test his theory.
"— so, when i went home, i got to tell my mom all about how well i did and how many compliments i got from the teachers. she said she'd make my jjajangmyeon tomorrow, too!" from her seat on the counter, joey sat swinging her legs with a cup full of absolute jungle-juice swishing inside as she told him about her successful friday quizzes. "i'm just so happy it's over. i could drink myself to death!"
anwar swore he was listening — he swore he was paying attention to each and every detail about her exams and all the people and especially that bloke dominic — but from his inebriated place against the adjacent island of this posh house he could not for the life of him keep his mind off of the yearn to bring his pounding heart as close to hers as possible. with slow blinks emphasizing his glossy eyes, anwar set his drink down and pushed himself to stand up in one swift motion, arms already wrapped under her shoulder blades by the time she understood what was happening.
it wasn't like they'd never hugged before — they have hugged plenty of times, in fact. physical contact was not a foreign language to them after a long childhood of sleepovers ending with him using her as a blanket because they fell asleep on the floor, but it definitely became less frequent the older they got. waking up on the floor with his head on her stomach was still a common occurrence, but tender interactions like hugs were typically reserved for serious, gloomy moments that called for it. like when her cat died. not, for example, while she was around 7 shots in telling him about her awesome day.
"wh—what's up?" she chuckled nervously, pulse against his as her fingertips subconsciously found his spine, "this is super haram." there was an anxiousness to her voice that even an intoxicated anwar picked up on, especially when pressed so close he could hear the vibrations of her vocal cords. anwar took a deep breath before he pulled away to reclaim his spot against the marble.
"i'm happy you're alive."
a flash of furrowed brows appeared across her face before she was then setting her cup down, sliding off the counter to put her jacket back on. "okay, annie, time to go home. i want you to remember this in the morning when i nurse you back to health."
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anwar declared to maxxie the following day (after recovering from his hangover) that he needed to be more careful with how he went about this with joey — if he was gonna muster the courage to talk about it, he had to be careful until that point came. he couldn't just find himself stumbling into it; he had to be smart about this and prove himself worthy as someone for joey, the famously proud virgin who ran off any guy looking in the wrong places for something 'haram' (as his dad and joey would say, though he was certain joey was only teasing.)
"how do i know she even likes guys? or anyone, for that matter!" anwar is almost spiraling with his eyes fixed on the ceiling fan, "the only people she's ever liked are all celebrities! sure, norman bates is an interesting choice, but everyone loves ralph macchio he's-the-fucking-karate-kid!!!"
maxxie, as per usual, was cool as a cucumber. "well, why don't you just do some spy work?” he suggested, “ask her sneaky questions...point her in that direction?"
this ingenious yet devious plan from the third musketeer would eventually be how joey accidentally stumbled into revealing a little too much, unknowingly lead into the territory by her best friend with a sinister motive as they waited on tony and michelle to stop shagging upstairs.
"hey," he'd inquire, innocent in the face as he looked over at her. "can i ask you something?"
"of course."
"the other day chris said mostly men have foot fetishes and mostly women have hand fetishes. is that true or..."
joey looked over at him already irritated, likely suspicious of a looming joke in poor taste. she sighed as she shrugged in an attempt to play off her genuine intrigue before actually pausing to think about it. it sounded true, didn't it?
"i mean...i have no sources, so don't quote me or anything, but i'd say it's probably true."
anwar leaned in a little closer. "but...so...you think a lot of women like hands?"
"i don't know, man," she chuckles and visibly leans away "i know some girls do. why are you so interested?"
"do you?"
now she's actually raising her guard, he can see it in her eyes as she grimaces at his questioning. "well..." joey starts, gaze flicking around the room so as to avoid his. "kind of."
anwar's mischevious smile would grow upon hearing this response, restraining the urge to tease and nudge her with an elbow in favor of continuing his spywork. "kind of?"
"i wouldn't even say it's a fetish like a foot fetish is —" she's speaking quickly the same way she did when trying to fight embarrassment, "it's just — girls can appreciate pretty hands when they see one — i can appreciate pretty hands. it's just an added bonus, you know? if you're hot that's awesome, if you're hot and you have nice hands..."
he didn't even have to think about his next line of questioning. "do i?" anwar asks, presenting forth a warm (and a little clammy from the nerves) palm toward her. joey's eyes would finally return to his, wide and utterly perplexed, before peering down at the fingers outstretched toward her.
"well..." she mutters, shaky fingertips grazing his knuckles as she turned his hand over. "i'd...say so. you have...um..." joey's almost crumbling under the pressure. her face is growing hotter by the second, covered only by the long locks of hair she let conceal her features while she tried to navigate this sticky situation. how to be honest while also not revealing that she had thought about his hands in detail plenty of times to recognize each and every vein and scar in the skin?
"well," her tone is stronger now that she's cleared her throat, "you don't have any visible diseases, so that's a start. your fingers are long — but not like, salad fingers long. and you have big hands, too, girls like that. — i think."
finally looking up from the back of the hand she knew well, joey's pupils are darker than before, a shy smile curling her red lips once she noticed his. 'sly' he thought, 'but not sly enough.' she'd set his hand back down in his lap as the creaking bed upstairs finally came to a halt.
"you're cheeky."
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moments such as these, tense and somewhat awkward but certainly suggestive, would be given the time to grow into an entire catalogue (later discussed between maxxie and anwar) that eventually built up into one final, fateful friday.
it was a friday like any other for the pair, the beginning of the weekend spent walking home side-by-side after school in order to drop off their bags before heading to some posh party tony had invited them to. but, halfway through the getting-ready process, anwar would decide to make a catastrophic play;
"do you know if kelsey will be there?"
joey, from her place laid flat over his covers, almost scoffed. "um...why would i know?"
"she's in your last period," anwar shrugged nonchalance before pulling a different shirt over his head. "just thought you might have overheard her say something about it." from the corner of his vision he could see her sit up for the first time in 20 minutes, her arms propped behind her back as she looked over at him, though he couldn't see her expression.
"how do you know that?"
"she told me yesterday." he'd say simply. joey only inched closer, her full and individed attention on him now as she sat at the edge of the mattress.
"she told you? what does that mean?"
anwar couldn't help the smirk that found it's way to his lips at the obvious jealousy in her voice. he turned to look at her — wiping the grin from his face first, of course. "it means she came up to me yesterday before last period to ask to hang out." he stated plainly, watching as her gaze became sharper, "but i said no cause i didn't wanna cancel our movie night."
"oh, how thoughtful of you."
anwar was immediately certain he'd made a severe miscalculation by the absolute venom in her voice, low and barbed and filled to the brim with animosity as she rolled her eyes — a gesture he didn't see often. joey sat tense with her arms folded over her chest so tightly that her nails dug into the skin like she was holding the leash of a rabid dog.
she spoke again.
"so thoughtful, in fact, it makes me wonder why you even bothered to bring kelsey up at all. you could've just kept that to yourself — and yet here we are. why is that, anwar?"
he audibly gulped, his mouth agape as he searched for an explanation to offer other than the real one. joey was too quick, however, too well-versed in anwar-isms to not notice his obvious tells of dishonesty. within a beat and a half she's shooting to her feet with her pointer finger angled accusingly at him.
"you know what? i'm sick to death of your double standards, anwar, and i never got an apology after you totally brushed me off over the dominic thing — so it's funny that you decide now is a great time to tell me all about how badly that cunt kelsey wants in your pants. did you think i'd be happy you canceled because of me? that i'm the roadblock?"
in their near-seventeen years of friendship, never has anwar seen joey so angry. of course they'd argued in the past, especially over trivial things, but jo typically spoke in this distinct whine that came out whenever she felt cornered. maybe that was just how he made her feel at the time, and maybe that was how she effectively wanted to make him feel — but he didn't have the time to think about that now.
"n—no, no," anwar is backpedaling, his mind spinning the wheel on where to begin — what to do. "i wasn't—i just—it's different!" he's incomprehensible through the fire in her veins.
"what's different, anwar? your hypocrisy? — telling me all about how well you and kelsey kerr get along but i'm the bitch for telling you how massive of a cunt i was to dominic?" her eyebrows are almost touching, the lines of disgust visible by her flared nostrils, teeth bared like a violent beast. joey's almost yelling by this point, "you made me feel like bristol's town slut for telling that — that fucker off and yet here you are asking me if your stupid hookup is coming to this stupid fucking party!"
anwar begins sputtering for the right words to say, nearly unintelligible as multiple explanations meld together into a frantic jumbled mess. "jo — no — it's different now! i just mean — i didn't — i was just trying —"
she's over it. "you know what!?" joey interrupts, her volume close to the loudest he'd ever heard her voice (minus the spider on her shoulder.) "i don't want to hear it!" and without another word she's already turning on her heel, stomping her way out the door before slamming it behind her. thank allah his family was out.
of course anwar followed after her! what else was he supposed to do? he'd be hot on her heels the whole way down the stairs, blubbering a slew of apologies and explanations and pleads as they exited his front door and walked right up to hers. joey then turned as her fingers gripped the knob, face to face with him from her spot on the top step, and wholly severed any lingering conversation to be had.
"shut up, anwar! just shut the fuck up! i don't know if you think it's funny to piss me off or what — but now i'm pissed off! so what i need from you right now is to shut your mouth and fuck off because i don't want to say anything mean to you because i love you—so.for.the.love.of...god or allah or whatever! — go away!"
anwar went back to his room with his tail tucked between his legs, head hung as he flopped onto his bed. he'd turn to look out his window — the one that had always been their own personal menagerie for the other to watch and occasionally sneak into — only to find her blinds closed. with a heavy and distinctly discouraged sigh anwar would spend another hour or so going over everything that had happened — everything that could happen after this passed. he'd find that the longer he thought about it, the worse the outcome between them spiraled in his mind, his hands and his legs restless — itching to get up and do something about it. so he did.
first anwar tried tapping on the glass to see if anyone was actually inside there, rightfully earning himself a middle finger that emerged from below the windowsill. he took it on the chin with a short nod of acceptance before turning around just to brainstorm another option, then deciding to throw pebbles at the street-view glass. that was rom-com-ish, right? maybe he could charm her enough to hear him out, to just listen from the top of the tower she'd barracaded herself in, to understand the love inside that begged to be seen.
although this attempt was completely ignored instead, anwar was not discouraged, finding his own resolve by his side; he'd either burn every bridge to joey in one fell swoop, or he'd make it to the other side unscathed. using a trick from his sisters who'd gushed over john cusack after watching that one movie from the 80s, anwar would head back inside only to emerge with the biggest boombox he could find propped on his shoulder, the tape she'd made for his 14th birthday already playing one of her favorite songs.
it took a moment (the entire first chorus) for a response, but soon a glossy-eyed and puffy-faced joey appeared in the window, arms still folded over her chest and brows still furrowed despite his determination.
'and you do your best to show me love.'
he held the boombox taller, stronger atop his shoulder as he watched the grip on her own arms loosen.
'but you don't know what love is.'
anwar offered a weak, apologetic, pathetic smile.
'so are you listening?'
finally, the outline of her smile would be revived as she let go of her flesh to pull the window pane up, lifting it over her head to lean over the edge. she couldn’t resist paramore.
"trying to get arrested?" she asks, obviously teasing although her tone remained the same as before.
anwar wouldn't waste even a second, setting the still-booming speaker on the ground to dive head first into redemption, calling up to her with a muddled and quivering voice.
"joey, i'm sorry! i'm sorry i'm not a better friend to you! i'm sorry i'm a hypocrite and a dick and a caveman and a jackass — i swear i'm good inside! i can be tender! i can be kind! please let me show you! i — i have all these feelings inside me and to you it's just words and you know i'm not good with my words!!"
joey pauses. there's a lot to sort through here and not a lot of context, so she's mid-filling in the gaps when he starts hollering again.
"i'm sorry about dominic! i know it was shitty — i just — i couldn't stand the thought of him — !" anwar nearly chokes on the words "i just wanted to make you jealous! i wanted to see if you felt as awful as i did! and i'm sorry, jo! i'm sorry i l—" he stops himself to gauge her reaction.
there is a smile of utter disbelief on her face now, teeth growing more and more visible as she stares down at him from her place on the second floor. even under the familiar streetlight he can see her cheeks blushing a deep red, eyes sparkling with what he'd describe as hope. with a deep breath and a leap of faith, anwar would finally say the three simple words that sealed the deal.
“i love you!!” anwar calls up to joey from his place on the sidewalk, the prince at the bottom of the tower calling up to the princess. and what does she say?
“i think about you when i touch myself!!”
anwar had never been so sure about anything in his life.
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zeronetxt · 1 month ago
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i just want to say this for the sake of saying this.
the batkids' fav kpop groups (according to me)
i hc that they listen to kpop bc I listen to kpop. so heres the list starting w the 4 robins
Dick Grayson
TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THIS MAN IS A GG STAN. i can feel the vibes from here. he might enjoy a few lil bg songs but he is def one of those cutesy gg stans. i think hed vibe well w fromis_9's music bc its really upbeat yk
ULT: fromis_9
Le Sserafim
Twice
Jason Todd
there is NO ONE. ON THIS SAD EARTH. that can convince me he isnt a twice ult. however, he probs enjoys hardcore/noise music from bgs as well (which is fair enough) so there we have ateez and skz. im CONVINCED hes a chan ult, no idea why though. also i put lesserafim there bc yes. that man is just gonna be girling girling.
ULT: Twice
ATEEZ or Stray Kids
Le sserafim
Tim Drake
i was a bit less sure on tim's one, but im pretty sure these would probably be some of his top three, since the music is somewhat either really poppy or really hardcore, but i also feel like he'd enjoy listening to nugu groups, mainly nugu ggs. probably learns choreos too (get it girl)
ULT: æspa
TXT
Red Velvet
Damian Wayne
on the OTHER side of the spectrum is damian. this guy definitely knows the big groups (by 'big' i mean yg, jyp and hybe groups. anyone else, and hed be like "who?") i know for a FACT hes a bp fan.
ULT: Blackpink
NewJeans
(maybe) BTS
in conclusion however, id like to point out they are ALL twice stans real men stan twice
thats the robins done (minus steph, shes up next)
I personally dont know what i rly expect from the batgirls this time 😔
BUT
the batgirls (im bouta lock in)
barbara gordon
THIS WOMAN IS A GG STAN. is all i have to say pretty much about her. i just KNOW she loves hwasa. or just the girlbosses of kpop because yes.
MAMAMOO
(G)I-DLE
(i cant think of a third one, but i feel a bit of itzy or lesserafim)
adding kiss of life bc yes
cassandra cain
now for cass, my theory is she likes more rock or 'happy' music, no in between. like my mind thinks she'd like tws for some reason, like plot twist might actually be one of her favs. but then i also see her vibing to dreamcatcher, rolling quartz and day6 clear as day(6)
Dreamcatcher
Day6
TWS (casual probs)
Rolling Quartz
stephanie brown
now listen when i say this. THIS GIRL IS A MULTISTAN FOR SURE. i also definitely see her being into the music with a lot going on, such as nmixx or nct, or the groups with a diverse music range such as txt, enhypen or boynextdoor (for me personally), and p1harmony. i think girl would just LOVE itzy, and sing it in the shower or smth
NMIXX
NCT
ITZY
now there are a bunch of other groups that i think one of them would like, but cant place my finger on eg. kard or nu'est. but meh whatever, i have most of my repressed thoughts out. the one thing i need to say though: EVERYONE STANS TWICE IN THE BATFAM. and/or (mostly and though) lesserafim. thats is all :)
bonus:
duke thomas
im a bit less sure w duke's but i def know (in my messed up head) that he likes bnd. now i have this belief that EVERYONE in the batfam is a once, its a rule atm, so obv he also likes twice
boynextdoor
twice
lesserafim or kiss of life (not sure which he'd like more tbh 🧍👺)
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aroaceleovaldez · 10 months ago
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if anyone's curious about my thoughts re: the di angelos cameo, i dont think it's the bg voice that sounds vaguely like theyre saying "Bianca" when Grover's playing the game, because a.) it doesnt get subtitles and b.) you can hear a similar sound when theyre in the parking garage, so it's more likely that's a repeated bg audio track they're playing for crowd noise. or they just didn't subtitle it (which sucks. even just "[indistinct voice]" would work if they dont wanna give it away, though that would still suck).
my suspicion is that the cameo is either in the bg of the ancient greek decor behind Hermes when he's talking with Annabeth and Percy (though the statue bust doesn't look like Hades and i didnt notice any pottery that looked specifically like Hades-related myths), or, the one i feel much more strongly about, the license plate on Hermes' taxi.
the plate number is only really solidly visible for one shot before both the front and back plates are knocked off by the car crashing, but it has the number 32 in it, which may be a reference to the (incorrect) year Nico was born (HoO says he was born in 1932, though in the first series he was born in 1929 - him being born in '32 wouldn't fit with the timeline). The plates being knocked off specifically and lacking in every other shot of the car is part of why i think that might be the cameo. There's also multiple vintage cars in the parking garage, at least one that looks like it could be from the 30s, though no references on those license plates that i could make out. And then there is also a sign in the garage that says "Exit to 142 street" which, if a reference, would be 1942, when Hazel died and is the absolute latest year the di Angelos could have been put in the casino (presuming Nico was born in '32).
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cookiesandcrumbs · 8 months ago
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Tiny cc making tips
Over the years of making cc i've picked up some tricks along the way. These are just some of them in a tiny format. So not a tutorial of any kind, just some tips and tricks! I'm sure many are already doing some of these things and some might require you to Know things already. This is NOT the only one way to do things, it's just how I do things. I wont go in to super detail since it's not a tutorial but i'll try to add as much info as possible and then let you figure it out. Or send an ask.
When naming things, images, packages, blends, whatever files in relation to cc making, create a naming system! Trust me when i tell you it will make your cc making process a lot more streamlined. My system is as follows: "BG maxi dress flower on shoulder pink fem". What we learn here is that it's a base game maxi dress with a flower on the shoulder, and it's the pink swatch. This way, if it's a blender file, i know i can export the diffuse map directly inside blender if i need it later without having to locate the dress in s4s. Fem is there to show what frame the mesh is from without having to open it. Same goes for "masc" items. For example "CL open jacket long sleeves turtleneck camo blue". This tells us it's city living and an open jacket with long sleeves in camo blue and has a turtleneck. Note: sometimes a pack name will have a similar abbreviation, like Cottage Living. My way is just adding another letter or two, COL. Or if the pack only has one word like Toddlers or Strangerville, you could then call it TOD and SV for example.
Make folders! One thing i find that makes things a little easier is that i make folders separating things. So first i have the project folder inside my cc making folder. Let's say i'm making a short satin dress, i'll make a folder "Short satin dress". Inside there i'll make a folder for blender files and one for image files. Inside blender folder i make a folder for lods and inside image folder i make folders for swatches and one for maps. If you're making a fem and masc framed version of the same thing, separate folders by frame as well, so you have a main folder inside "Short satin dress" for fem and one for masc etc and so on. This is so you don't mix textures and blend files up, because for example, sometimes the diffuse map sits differently on a masc frame mesh compared to a female framed mesh.
One thing i hate about making cc (other than MAKING cc.........) is making textures. I'm not good at it and this d.o.a game eats textures like it's the last can of catfood in the world, compressing it to hell and back. One thing i've learned and my friend @faaeish told me about is that adding a bit of noise helps! What i like to do, once i have finished my base layer i know i will recolor later, i make a noise layer out of it using "Noise [Additive] with this plugin and i do Output mode: New layer(s) at the bottom. I use gimp but this plugin can also be used with nearly every program under the sun, including ps. It's also online based. You can play around with the settings but i like to use something like below. One thing i realized well, just the other day is that, if you use RGBA noise instead of gray noise, it adds a bit more depth and texture. But not too much! Just a smidgen, to give the texture and the color fill layer more pixels to cling to and it will minimize the risk of artifacts. Ugly blobs, essentially. Once i have that noise layer i alpha to selection on my base layer, invert and sharpen and click the noise layer to remove the access around that the filter adds. I'll also clean up any alpha channels, filling them with white if i need to. Then i play around with layer modes on the noise layer, add a color fill above that and maybe i'll duplicate the base layer and put above the color fill layer. Like below is an example.
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Next is a thing for blender, tiny miniature tip but that i find helps me. And that's this little plus sign button when you "Save as.." in blender. So what you need to do when you FIRST save some edits on your mesh, say you swapped the sleeves out. You "File-Save as..-bg no pockets tshirt rolled up sleeves blue fem LOD0_edit0. 0. Zero is important. You need to save the very first save as 0. Next time you make any changes you Save As and click the plus and it will just change 0 to 1. Next time 1 to 2 etc etc. To me this makes it easier to go back in case i mess up. Which i sometimes do. Like the other day i noticed fingers were messed up and i had to go back to nearly the beginning of my edits to pull original fingers and sleeves from. And i always save right before i make any major edits.
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That's all i can think of right now. I'll put a read more in case i think of more later. Hope this helps!
ooo 👻 welcome to under the cut aaaa 👻. But look at this photo i took of a photo i found among my grandmas old stuff. I guess the crops were hung that year.
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kokichis-dead-dove-club · 2 months ago
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Ok, I hope you don't mind if I vent just a little!! I promise it's not anything like super important but idk who else to talk to about this.
Sometimes I watch Sa//ber//spa//rk for bg noise and stuff, and he recently made a vid on the whole deal with the mig//hty magi///swo//rds (sorry i keep censoring stuff i dont want them showing up in main tags!!) creator. the thing is, he went on this little tangent about how one of the victims of the creator drew sh0//ta art as a way to release their trauma. it starts at 28:30, but my personal problem is that he was just so snarky about it, almost. saying shit like "if true" about the whole venting trauma through art thing, putting a stupid-ass meme after describing what sh//0//ta was, and even doubted the therapist who recommended them to do this. "that just does not sound likely to me" bro shut your dumb ass up
it's even worse that the person he was talking about went through a health crisis and got blacklisted from the animation industry because of the creator. have a bit of respect, man
sorry to dump this on you!! i just needed to talk to someone about this because even if its not the end of the world, it still sucks to hear someone you like say stuff like that
-emo*******h
well that makes my decision on whether or not to watch that video a lot easier! looks like i'm unsubscribing too
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uh-oh-its-bird · 1 year ago
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Hi there take some unsolicited starwars fic ideas that Im literally never going to fully write but am agressivley thinking about anyways
Summary:
A ghost sits in the emperor's shadow. Teeth bared, eyes sharp, lying in wait.
Tldr; Fox is killed by Palpatine but at this point his soul has been fucked with by dark force shit(tm) so much that he's able to linger on as a half-there remnant
When Luke confronts Palpetine some more weird force shit(tm) happens and Fox is able to manifest in time to kill the bitch, and by eating his soul (???) he gains the power to manifest more fully as some sort of very much *not* human force,,, *thing*
Also Cody and Obi-Wan are still alive and also are sickeningly in love because fuck you that's why
I need you to imagine Sunshine Luke holding up Clearly Not Normal Fox like
"!!!!!! Look what I found!!!!!!"
"Luke he ate the emperor"
"Ok and?"
This also means Darth Vader is alive so he's just kind of Awkwardly standing there in the corner like
🧍‍♂️ "Commander Fox. I am." *heavy breathing.* "Pleased to see you survived."
"I didn't."
*More heavy breathing*
No clue how that'd go but it'd go SOMEWHERE
Maybe Fox wanted to eat him too but has some sort of weird pity for him after watching over the Emperor's shoulder for so many years. They're both Palpatine's fucked up little experiments, even if Fox can identity exactly what went wrong a LOT better than Anakin. Hell, they actually possibly interacted some before Fox got axed, maybe they were almost friends. Got that good old 'unspoken understanding' energy where they make eye contact once in a while and just kind of nod and look away.
Thinking also ab how the rebels are either, totally off put and don't trust him at all or *Oh wow well he killed the emperor for us!!! But he's also uhh. Kind of a freak. But he killed the emperor, so???* or just full throttle *He killed!!! The emperor!!! My favorite boy!!!! Look at him go!!!!! Eldrich who?? I don't care I am in LOVE!!!!*
Fox getting all this love and support from some VERY eager and thankful rebels. He's one of them now!! No take backs!!!!
Also Luke has absoloutley claimed him as his own. Cool powerful clone commander??? Sort of friends with his dad??? Killed the emperor??? Luke NEEDS them to be friends. Leia is a bit more hesitant at first but warms up quickly, and Han is Han so he probably makes some noise ab it but the second he hears anyone say shit he's ready to throw down.
I'm actually a personal fan of 'being half force means Anakin was a 'lill otherworldly and that otherness definatley passed down to his kids' so maybe Palpatine's experiments had to do with trying to shove some of that specific otherworldliness into Fox, and it kind of resonates with the twins. They see him and just go *!!!! Oh???? One of us???*
Han in the bg with his own weird force null thing and his close relationship with the twins just. Not really sensing anything wrong. He's grown even number to weird otherness and eldrich force vibes, Fox is a bit odd to him but he just can't see what the fuss is about. Everyone needs to calm the fuck down smh
And Fox ofc just standing there covered in blood as he's suddenly receiving all this positive attention and support like *I don't know how to feel about any of this.*
Part of him wants to just. Return to the shadows. He's done his part now. He wants to rest. Let the man SLEEP he's fucking earned it
Anyways this is definatley inspired more than a little by @wreathedinscales's Corrie Red AU, which you should absoloutley read if you like anything eldrich and anything Fox
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canmom · 10 months ago
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last season's anime: that elf show (1-6)
Belatedly watching Sousou no Frieren, the darling of the... previous anime season four months ago. So old news as far as most are concerned!
I have held off on watching this one because, well, videogamey elves-and-dwarves European fantasy is ehhhhhh! I can get into it if it's really well done and puts the focus somewhere interesting (c.f. Dungeon Meshi), or if its medievalism is a bit more historically grounded than your average videogame-inflected fantasy anime (actual European history is full of fascinating/fucked up shit which rarely makes it into fantasy). But Frieren didn't strike me as having that vibe.
Nevertheless I heard Madhouse were the ones that did it and somehow that was enough to finally tip me over into watching it. So lol. I was a baby or even an ovum when Madhouse were doing most of their best known work, and yet...
Anyway, it turns out, not only was it a Madhouse project, but none other than Yoshiaki Kawajiri actually boarded a good few of the episodes, although he's not the enshutsu [episode director/storyboarder] whose people are most excited about. The series director's last work was Bocchi the Rock after all! And this sure is another hit.
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The first two things that jumped out at me in the first episodes were: the bgs are insanely good looking and the photography department is absolutely in love with a digital bokeh filter. I don't think I often see this specific kind of blur filter in anime (though I think you'll see it the works of some directors who like to emulate realistic photography like Yamada or Shinkai), and it was interesting the effect it had of eliding the lines and creating an effect kind of similar to posterisation.
Bokeh aside, the background painting and layouts in this anime are really incredibly good. When I occasionally watch fantasy anime - I have a friend who is quite into isekai and will occasionally show me one of her faves such as Ascendance of a Bookworm - one thing that often bothers me is the architecture, you have identical box-shaped houses with big windows, wide flat streets, it generally doesn't feel like a lived-in city. This is something that particularly bothers me about Attack on Titan.
By contrast, Frieren is routinely dropping scenes like this:
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Split levels, varied colours and heights, accurate depiction of features like jettying, mixing up the verticals a bit. It's an impressive attention to detail and it does so much to sell the setting.
And the nature scenes are outstanding as well. Although I'm pretty sure they're painted digitally, it has the feeling of older physical media. The bg painters clearly understand the power of hinting at form with brush stroke shapes and a few flat colours - a technique similar to the bg paintings at Ghibli. There's rarely an obvious digital texture and they exercise restraint in overwhelming everything with glows and flares. The flat colours and paint-like textures are allowed to shine on their own. Plus everything has a subtle grain (pretty sure it's just good old Perlin noise), adding to the analogue feel.
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But yeah, look at the subtle atmospheric perspective in the last one there! The layers of forest in the background are painted with less saturated colours, creating a powerful sense of layering and distance, without having to draw more trees than the immediate foreground. I could learn a lot from this painting alone when it comes to forest scenes.
While I'm going on about technical stuff, the animation also stands up. The first episode in particular has some real flexes with crowd scenes containing dozens of moving characters. The character animation is generally very restrained, but naturalistic. There is constantly a strong sense of space. The action animation later does less for me - it's not at all bad, but it's within the conventions of modern shounen adaptations - but it's generally speaking strong.
All that said, what about what it's actually, y'know, about?
Frieren wastes little time in establishing its premise. The title character is a nigh-immortal elf, who was part of the RPG party that defeated the demon lord just prior to the outset of the show. Frieren has a pretty flat affect in general - not to say she's emotionless, far from it, but rather the heavy lifting of what she's feeling has to be conveyed through cinematography and implication of her actions. Though that said, it does plenty to humanise (elfise?) her too - she is not a morning person, and there are moments where she will get visibly excited about small things. Mostly, Frieren is a character who really doesn't understand herself very well.
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Comparisons to the prototypical emotionaless girl Rei Ayanami come to mind to me - especially the version of Rei we encounter in Eva 3.0+1.0. Both characters' affect is shaped by transience - for Rei, she's a short-lived clone, for Frieren, her perception of time is completely miscalibrated to all the people around her so she'll accidentally disappear for decades while they get old and die. And both characters' arcs involve learning about how to understand human connections.
As kvin has said in his impressively detailed article on the background to this show, this premise is used to tell a story about the passage of time. In the specific, it's about the grief of realising you did not spend enough time with someone after they've gone. Frieren is retracing the steps of the party after disappearing from their lives for nigh on 50 years, returning just in time to catch the human characters as they die of old age. The episodes are usually constructed around her memory of that adventure, paralelled by the connection she's forming in the present with her new apprentice. She's trying to do things that she never managed to do when they were alive, get in touch with her own feelings, etc. etc. Lots of mono no aware in the air.
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So each episode tends to develop two stories in parallel. There will be the immediate impetus - Frieren and co. find something that needs dealing with and coincidentally links back in to the past - and also flashbacks which help flesh out the rest of Frieren's party and why the journey was such a big deal to her. The writing and editing generally does a very good job of knowing what to leave unstated, what can be implied by a cut and a closeup.
More than anything I think I'm reminded of Seirei no Moribito. Frieren herself reminds me a little of Balsa - they're quite different characters, but the way they relate to others and the general arc of being changed by their connections - and while the dynamic between her and Fern is a little less parental than Balsa and Chagum, the use of scenery and the general approach to setting up of episode plots feels quite similar.
Predictably, stories about grief touch a nerve! 'I didn't properly appreciate the time I had with her' is something I feel particularly with my friend Fall, who we lost nearly two years ago now. A story about figuring out just what someone meant to you after they are gone is resonant, shall we say.
The first and second episodes as a pair end up particularly affecting. I talked about the technical stuff above, but the editing is also really strong. A couple of moments that stood out to me: moment of ephiphany communicated with a sudden eye closeup, an L-cut to bells which you don't hear until there's been another cut to the actual funeral. Since I've been in the sakugabooru server I've been learning to pay a lot more attention to individual enshutsu, so the names to credit in this case are Saito himself for the first, and Tomoya Kitagawa for the second.
The third episode (Daiki Harashina) stumbles a bit in my view, not so much because of the direction but because the script brings in some less-interesting magic mechanics and fighting-a-demon elements. The fourth episode, the first directed by Kawajiri, falls back into the rhythm: the stakes are small but we feel the development of Frieren and Fern's dynamic.
The fifth (Kenichi Shimizu) and sixth (Toru Iwasawa) episodes are a two part story, introducing a new character Stark as a second young apprentice character - the sixth episode has a really exceptional action scene with its dragon fight, bringing in a lot of familiar action animator names, and moreover the preceding episode does the work to set it up so we're invested in the culmination of the character arc it represents! Also there's that one sitting down cut I heard about. I wasn't sure I'd be on board with Stark at first, but he's growing on me through his interactions.
By this point we're starting to have more present-day 'villagers have a monster problem' type setups, but they're still primarily instruments to advance characterisation: the conflict of Stark with cowardice and responsibility is paralelled by one of Frieren's former party members, Frieren and Fern get to face ghosts of people they've lost, etc.
The first few episodes jump forward in years at a time in between, and even within the episodes tend to elide huge periods of time with montages - very effective for driving the central theme of tiiiiime. That seems to be slowing down a little now, although we'll see.
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I think if anything weakens it, it's that the demons and monsters feel undercooked as setting elements - and I'm a little worried by hearing that they become increasingly central elements as the show goes on. Of course, they're kinda mandated by the RPG setting, and being able to just say 'back when demons attacked the village' lets the show put its time into characterisation. But to take episode 3 for example - surely there is drama to be had in the idea of a senior underling who was frozen for nigh eighty years, unaware that his master had been overthrown? But nah, he just attacks immediately, and then it turns out that human magic science has advanced so much building out from his technique that he's not a big deal anymore (ratfic ass concept). Mostly demons and monsters exist as plot devices, opportunities for characters to prove themselves or experience an epiphany.
It's a shame because the show goes to such enormous lengths to flesh out everyone else's motivations. 'Why did character x do or feel y' is kind of the thrust of every episode (c.f. that kinda questionable stuff people say about JP storytelling being more about causality than conflict). Next time they supply us a demon character, I hope they're willing to give them a comparable treatment. 'Kind, peace-loving villagers vs ontologically evil baddies' is just such a boring dynamic, and with such love poured into everything else, it seems a shame.
Overall, I don't think Frieren is going to displace Tengoku Daimakyou as my fave of 2023, or stand alongside Dungeon Meshi as elves-and-dwarves fantasy goes, but it's definitely a memorable one. As an adaptation it's absurdly strong. Looking forward to watching the rest.
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ashboy-3 · 11 months ago
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To Know Your Family Chapter 1
Summary: Bruce is gone and the boys have become orphans again. The day of the funeral Bruce's will was read to everybody. He asked that his sons go to stay with his brother if he allowed it. He asked Alfred that of he wanted to he could leave, but if not then to go with the boys as he did not want to put such a heavy burden on him. Alfred could never leave those kids alone, even if they were going to someone else. Who is this mysterious brother by the way. why no one else but the one and only Tony Stark.
April 30, 20XX
“You’re time is up Batsy!” Joker laughed as he held a button.
“I think you forget that I won’t go down easy,” Batman stepped carefully, making sure to be weary of any stray traps.
“That’s the fun of this one! We’re going down together!” Joker laughed as he was able to catch Batman in a crazy hug, instantly pushing the button.
“What was that noise?” Nightwing asked, worry in his voice through the comms.
“Sounds like it came from the barge” Red Robin’s reply was instant.
“That’s where Bats was checking out tonight,” Red Hood added in the conversation.
“Everyone meet at the barge. Find Batman,” Nightwing was quick to order everyone while everyone tried to get a replay.
“Guys I’m not getting a replay on comms. Something must be wrong,” Batgirl was panicking.
“Calm down. Who’s closest towards the barge?” Nightwing asked.
“I’m two minutes out. I’ll be there in one,” Hood was quick to replay.
“I’m already here,” Red Robin announced.
“Robin? Little Wing? Where are you?” Nightwing was yelling into the comm.
“I can’t find Father,” Robin’s broken voice spoke through the comms after a few minutes of silence.
“The scene is a mess. GCPD has arrived,” Red Robin informed.
“Batgirl are you on the scene?” Nightwing was trying to figure out how to handle the situation.
“I just arrived. You’re the last one.”
“Okay, Batgirl handle Gordon. Hood get Robin out of there. Red you’re with me and we’re searching the scene.”
Everyone was quick to reply to Nightwing’s orders. Red Robin and Nightwing spent the night searching the barge. It was halfway through the night when Red Robin called in an alert from the other side of the site.
“You found something?” Nightwing asked, jumping down from the unsteady bars to join his brother.
“The Joker is dead. I don’t see Bats anywhere, but Wing, this is B’s arm and leg,” Red Robin pointed out the separated limbs covered in black cloth and stained with dark dried blood.
“I’m going to have to talk to Gordon,” Nightwing sighed as what happened finally got to him.
“Dick?” Tim asked, taking a step back, trying to get the logic right in his head.
“It’s going to be okay. Meet in the cave in the morning. Don’t tell Jay about the Joker just yet. Let me be the one to tell him,” Dick sighed, suddenly feeling the weight of the world on him.
“I won’t tell him,” Tim assured his older brother as his hand went to his ear. “Red Robin reporting. Everyone is to go back to the cave. Meeting in the morning.”
“Where’s Wing?” Batgirl was quick to ask.
“I’m here BG. I have to talk to Gordon. I’ll be there as soon as I’m done,” Nightwing promised as he and his brother separated, Tim going home and Nightwing landing on the top of the GCPD building, knowing that at this point they would have gone back, waiting on the Bat report.
“No big bad Bat tonight?” Gordon asked, standing on the roof, drinking his coffee.
“The Joker is dead,” Nightwing said calmly and carefully, seeing Jim spit his drink out in surprise as he looked at the younger vigilante.
“Are you sure?”
“Batman is presumed dead. We didn’t find a body, but we found two missing limbs; an arm, and a leg. From what we understand Joker was holding Bruce Wayne hostage, just another way to mess with Batman. A bomb went off killing the three in the process. Bruce Wayne’s body was not found, but he is presumed dead,” Nightwing explained.
“Wing?” Gordon asked.
“I know. We’ll keep the bat quiet as long as we can.”
“We’ve worked together for years, not as long as me and the bat, but I still remember the day that you first showed up as Robin. I think that I know you better than you think.”
“Is there a point that you’re trying to make Gordon?” Nightwing asked harshly.
“No need to bite my head off. I know you don’t want to be Batman, but we both know that Gotham needs him. What are you and the others going to do?”
“We’re going to keep Batman alive. Don’t worry about us, Gordon. We’ve all dealt with loss before,” Nightwing assured with a tight smile as he dispersed off of the roof.
“That doesn't mean it gets any easier,” Gordon whispered into the night, deciding if he was going to sit on a roof by himself and drink coffee on any night, it would be tonight. He can call the mayor in the morning.
“What’s going on Dick?” Barbara asked the second Nightwing entered the cave, a frown on his face.
“Master Dick. How wonderful to see you! Is Master Bruce having another late late night?” Alfred asked, walking in with a tray of coffee and tea, making Dick look at the ground.
“I didn’t tell anyone,” Tim said softly holding his arm, looking down at the ground, trying to keep the tears in.
“The Joker is dead. He’s not coming back,” Dick informed all of his family.
“So Bruce finally gained the balls to kill him!” Jason cheered, Dick didn’t yell at his brother for how he was acting, they didn’t know. He saw Tim grip his arm tighter, wanting to say something, wanting to defend Bruce’s honor, but he knows Jason will soon regret it himself.
“While no body was found, Tim found a severed arm and leg that is to be assumed to be Bruce’s. I informed the GCPD tonight that Bruce and Batman are both to be presumed dead,” Dick said softly, but everyone heard, Alfred dropped his tray in shock.
“No!” Alfred shouted.
“I’m sorry. He never called for Backup, and we were not aware at the time that he was dealing with the Joker. While there is a possibility that he can be alive, by the amount of blood found at the site it is not likely. Everyone prepares yourselves. Bruce’s funeral will be a closed casket, and we have to put on a show for the public,” Dick ordered everyone, grabbing Alfred’s shoulder to help the elderly man up, not letting him clean the mess.
“Go upstairs, Alfred. I’ll clean it up.” Dick assured him.
“Why do we have to put on a show for the fucking public!” Jason yelled.
“You don’t! You’re still dead!” Tim yelled at him.
“Father can’t be-”
“I’m gonna go home. . .I’m so sorry boys” Babara left in a hurry, tears in her eyes.
“Let her go. She’s about to get the same talk from her father,” Dick was quick to stop his brothers from grabbing her.
“Who’s going to tell the JL?” Tim asked.
“I’m going to do it tomorrow. After the press conference. Just be brave?” Dick asked a small smile on his face, Jason just scoffed as he stomped up the stairs.
“Give him time. For now, the city will be in shock, even the villains. No mask till after the funeral,” Dick ordered as he sat down in the main chair of the bat computer and sighed. Logging in he found the Joker’s file and edited it to be deceased.
May 1, 20XX
“Richard.”
“Hamilton Hill,” Dick greeted with a sad smile, as he helped the young Wayne out of the car.
“I’m terribly sorry. I heard the news,” Hamilton patted him on the back.
“It’s a sad day for all of Gotham,” Dick agreed, walking up the back of the stage.
“Are you’re brothers not coming?”
“They agreed that they should stay home. It was a shock to us. If we had it our way we would wait for the press conference or not hold one at all,” Dick spoke sadly as he saw a welcomed familiar face.
“Dick! I heard the news! I’m so sorry!” Jim Gordon was quick to shake Dick’s hand.
“Wish it was under better circumstances,” Dick shook his hand.
“Don’t we all,” Jim agreed.
“Let’s not keep the public waiting. The tabloids have already been running rumors,” Hill gestured to the scene.
“After you,” Dick agreed, fixing his tie as a way to calm him down.
“Good morning, Gotham City. I know many of you are wondering why this emergency preconference was called. Last night we lost a valued member of our community, the White Knight of Gotham, Bruce Wayne. Joining me today are Commissioner Jim Gordon and his oldest son Richard Grayson-Wayne,” Hamilton Hill stepped aside to let the others join him.
The camera flashed violently as the two walked on the stage, people screaming for answers. News reports looking for a story, but all the citizens agreed that today was a sad day indeed.
“Thank you, Mayor Hill. Last night it was confirmed that Joker had kidnapped Bruce Wayne, only to alert Batman and Batman only of what he had done. He was warned not to tell anyone, or he would end Mister Wayne. Batman showed up on the scene but turns out it was a lie. The Joker had rigged a bomb and let it go off killing both him and Wayne in the process. I will take three questions before letting Richard take over.
“Commissioner! How will Harley Quinn react now that the Joker is gone?”
“Harley has been in Arkham for the past three months and at this time is unaware that the Joker has passed. We have taken notice that in the past year, she has been more distant from the Joker. We think this will only affect her by making her more independent. Next.”
“Why did Batman let the Joker die? Is Batman now accepting killing as a way of punishment?”
“No. Batman informed the GCPD that he did his absolute best to stop anything tragic from happening, trying his best to keep everything to property damage only. He appeared on the scene and without hesitation Joker grabbed Wayne and pushed the button letting the bombs around him go off. We believe that his plan was to take the Bat out with him but failed. Last Question.”
“Is Batman dead?”
“Batman is not dead. He is still living and alive, but he is heavily injured. The GCPD does still plan to work with him and his team, but we understand if he does not show up for a few days to heal. That’s all the questions I’m willing to answer. Please welcome Richard,” Gordon finished talking, shaking, and giving Wayne a hug as they swapped spots.
“Thank you, Mayor Hill and Commissioner Gordon. As some of you may have noticed I am here alone. My brothers preferred to grieve in the silence of Wayne Manor. We are doing as well as we could be after losing our father. Bruce took me in when I was nine. He was there the night my parents died and took me in. I will not lie and say that it was easy for either of us. Parenting is a challenge and Bruce bravely took on that challenge for a broken boy who could barely speak English. I owe Bruce a great deal as does my brothers and most of Gotham.
The funeral will be private, for family and friends only, but we will be holding a candlelight vigil for two days open to the public. Everyone is welcome from Crime Alley, Gotham Heights, to the Hills. We invite everyone. We do not yet have a location, but it will be opened in three days' time. We, the Wayne family, invite everyone and anyone, all of Gotham to show your support. This is a sad day, but my family intends to go through it as Bruce taught us to. We will be Brave. We will remember him. We will honor his name. Questions?” almost immediately the cameras were flashing and microphones were so close to being shoved in his face.
“Grayson! What will happen to Wayne Industries now that Bruce has passed on?”
“Lucius Fox, one of Bruce’s most trusted friends. Will be taking over as CEO temporarily until I have finished college and can take over. He has agreed to keep us in the loop about what is going on. If any major changes are going to happen Lucius has agreed to give us a call or drop by the manor to talk to us about it first. Wayne Industries will still be in the Wayne Family and still providing as it has done for many years. Next”
“How does it feel to be head of the family now that Bruce is gone?”
“The head of the family is and always has been Bruce’s dear friend Alfred Pennyworth. Bruce has always told us that he would not be where he was today without him. This holds true now that he has passed. Next”
“Will you and your brothers be sent to orphanages or separate homes now that your main guardian has passed? Damian Wayne is the only blood son after all.”
Dick fully glared at the guy but held his cool. “While the will has not yet been read, Bruce has always assured us that if anything were to happen, he would not separate us, blood son or not. Bruce cared for all of us as if we were his blood, not just his youngest. No matter how many fights we had with him, he assured us that we were welcome back. If I had to assume I would say that we will be in the care of Alfred Pennyworth. I’ll take one more question.”
“Are you happy now that Bruce is dead you can take over his company freely?”
“No more questions,” Jim was quick to step in, as he pushed a wide-eyed Dick off of the stage. “We thank you all for coming. Information on the candlelight will be posted on Gotham’s welcome page later today.”
“You okay Richard?” Hill asked gently.
“I’ll be fine. Bruce always tried to warn us about how ruthless the vultures could be, but it never prepares you for when they actually ask the questions to your face,” Dick assured him.
“You handled yourself well. Bruce would be proud. Go on home and spend time with your family. The council will take care of the candlelight,” Hill assured him.
“But we can still help,” Dick tried to fight him.
“Bruce has done many things for this community, let the community give back just this once. You and your brothers make an appearance and we will handle the rest. Your father just died, that takes a toll on someone,” Hill grabbed his shoulder.
“Yeah. We’ll go and take a break. The Will still needs to be read,” Dick’s breath was heavy as he sighed. Saying his goodbyes to the government employees he got back in his car, dreading his meeting with the Justice League.
Dick didn’t even have five minutes to himself before his phone started blowing up with different heroes asking him questions. Taking a deep breath, he sent one text in the heroes group chat that was set up years ago for shits and giggles, but now getting an actual use.
Meeting at JL HQ. Will explain                   -Nightwing
“Dick the Justice League is-” Tim started as Dick held a hand up.
“I know Tim. Ignore their questions. I just sent a message in the group chat. Let me take care of anything. The message will get passed to everyone eventually,” Dick assured him. “Damian still hasn’t come out of his room?”
“Not since we got back last night. I don’t think he’s handling this well,” Tim looked down, wanting badly to grab his heart and throw it on the ground. He wanted to feel as bad as Jason and Damian did. He wanted to feel the hurt that Dick felt for their foster father, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t produce one single tear. If anything that thought made him even more sad. It didn’t stop how terrible he felt in his head. He hated this situation. He wants Bruce back, but knows that’s not possible. Once someone is gone their not coming back, even if they are Batman.
“Something wrong Tim?” Dick asked softly, looking his brother in the eyes.
“I can’t cry! I miss Bruce! I want Bruce back! I don’t want him to be dead and the thought hurts! But my tears won’t come out. I don’t have this feeling of dread that everyone in this house seems to have and I want that! I don’t know why I don’t feel horrible like the rest of you!” Tim stressed.
“Hey calm down,” Dick spoke softly, moving Tim to a couch, easily sitting down next to him, letting his brother hug him. “It’s okay that you don’t feel the same as the rest of us. Everyone goes through these things differently. You might not feel horrible about everything now, but you might tomorrow or in an hour, maybe even a week. Did you know that when we were in middle school Babs grandmother died?” Dick asked him, looking at the picture of Bruce’s parents.
“I didn’t know. She barely mentions any family besides her parents,” Tim mumbled.
“Yeah well, she was close to her grandmother. Used to talk about her all the time, but she was also really sick that year. Her grandmother has passed on. It was old age, nothing anyone could do to save her. Babs came to school that day and while she was different she acted kind of like you are now. She was quiet and there was a dark cloud around her, but she didn’t cry. The next day she calls me and ask me to go to the funeral with her, I agree of course. I wasn’t going to leave my best friend when she really needed me. I had never seen Babs cry at this point. It wasn’t until her father went up there and started talking about his mom’s life did Babs finally break down. She was waiting for the tears to fall. It’s okay to not be sad right away. The tears will come when they come. Right now just remember Bruce and how much he loved us,” Dick hugged him.
“Thanks, Dick,” Tim smiled softly, hugging his knees to his chest.
“Hey, that’s what big brothers are here for,” Dick smiled.
“Are we going to be separated?” Tim asked, looking up at Dick, worry filling his eyes.
“Bruce wouldn’t let that happen to us. Don’t worry,” Dick assured him as his phone continued to blow up. “Damn it. I’m sorry Tim. Please don’t worry about it. Everything will be sorted. I have to handle the League,” Dick rolled his eyes, a frown on his face.
“Dick, is it true?” Clark was the first to greet him as he exited the Zeta tube.
“Let’s go to the meeting Clark,” Dick said sadly, walking towards the main room, knowing Clark was frowning behind him.
“I’m sure many of you have seen the Press conference that happened at Gotham earlier this morning,” Dick started, seeing many nods.
“All that was found was a severed arm and leg. The amount of blood that covered the scene implies the number of bodies that would be present. Batman is assumed to be dead. Joker is confirmed dead,” Dick looked down, knowing many of the leagues, specifically the main six, were hit harder than the others.
“What about Bruce Wayne?” one of the newer league members asked, clearly not knowing Batman’s secret identity.
“Bruce Wayne, while not found, was known to be on the scene when the bomb went off. As I said before the amount of blood at the scene is too much for the three bodies to have survived,” Dick repeated his answer.
“So what’s going to happen to Batman?” Superman asked.
“That has yet to be discussed between the family but be assured the mantle will be taken up. If you excuse me I have a funeral to plan,” Dick turned around but not before being stopped by Diana.
“Nightwing wait!”
“Yes, Wonder Woman?”
“Can we hold a service here?”
Dick looked out of the window into the night sky as he answered, “You can. I can’t guarantee that any bats will be present, we are going to be on leave unless it is a dire emergency.”
“I understand. I’ll pass the message on,” she agreed, letting him go.
Every citizen showed up to the candlelight Vigil, if you were there at the right time, you would have seen one of the Wayne boys fixing up flowers and other things left behind.
Many of Bruce’s personal friends whom he would meet at the Gala every year left money and it soon turned into an accidental donation fund. It was already too much money before the boys discovered it. When wondering what to do with it Mayor Hill offered to make a Bruce Wayne memorial. After all, he’s helped out with Gotham more than Batman did.
“That would be wonderful. Thank you, Mayor Hill,” Dick shook his, before being on his way, he was stopped on the way out.
The funeral contained the best friends of the boys, Jim Gordon, Selina Kyle, and the main six leaguers. It was a small funeral, but that’s what the family wanted.
May 8, 20XX
It was a week later after the funeral when Bruce’s will was to be read.
No one really knows what to expect but they knew they had to listen. They knew that this will will determine their lives.
"Alfred I leave you everything. The company, mansion, and money to take care of until each of my boys are graduated from high school, or have the equivalent of a high school degree but I don't want you to have the burden of raising 4 more boys for the rest of your life like me. You may not stay with them if you wish, but we both know that you would never leave your grandchildren. To make things easier on you I am giving my brother full custody of the kids.”
As the last sentence was said you could see the surprise on everyone's faces, including Alfred's.
"Bruce has a brother," the words whispered out of Tim's mouth.
A few hours later the boys and Alfred were in the living room just being quiet while Alfred served them tea.
"I just don't get it. Bruce's parents were murdered and then you took him in. A few years later he becomes Batman. That's the story we were told," Tim said looking down, trying to make the facts make sense. He had never seen a picture of Bruce and another boy within the manor. He could have missed it, but that’s impossible for him.
"There's a reason for that Master Tim. Master Bruce and his brother got along quite well as children, but as they grew up into adults they parted ways. Master Bruce took over the company while Master Tony went and started up his own business. They did talk to each other three times a year. A call on Christmas and birthdays. Other than that they really didn't have contact," Alfred explained.
"Okay, but why are we going to him and not just let you have custody," Jason asked. You could see that he was frustrated with the situation as well as everyone else.
"I am an old man Master Jason. I was with the late Master and Mistress Wayne. Once they died I raised Master Bruce. After a few years, he took in you Master Dick and suddenly there were four of you. Even if I tried with all my might, something could happen and an adult needs to have custody of you. Master Bruce thought of this. That is why he is giving his Brother custody over you."
"Will we have to leave the mansion," Dick asked sad at the thought of leaving the scary mansion he had come to learn was soft and warm, like how a home should be.
"I am afraid that you might. You see Master Tony lives in New York," This made all of the Bats' heads snap up.
"Really. We're moving from the most psychotic city to the Big Apple where no one's dreams ever come true," Tim said with a bland expression.
"I'm sure we can work something out with Master Tony to come to visit Gotham," Alfred assured them.
"I suggest you start packing. We do have a plane to catch after all," Alfred told the boys, collecting their empty cups.
"Wait! You're not leaving us," Damian asked, truly terrified of losing someone who showed him what family meant.
Alfred gave him a small sad smile as he put the tray of cups down and got done on a bended knee while putting a hand on his shoulder, " Master Damian I can assure you that I am not going anywhere. Even Master Tony won't dare kick me out. I can scare him just as much as I can scare Master Bruce." With that, Alfred got back up and finished the dishes while he sent the boys to get ready to leave.
He warned them not to bring too much just the main things they think they need. Once they figure out the living situation they can get the rest of their stuff.
It was a day later and they were all in a rental car, with Alfred driving, as the boys asked who Bruce's brother was.
"I didn't want to tell you before because I know how you boys are. Tony Stark is Bruce's brother. Now do behave yourself," Alfred told them as a warning.
Part 2 >>>
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