#and overprotective

[thankstothe]

Exs

[sunnbnn]

This can't be happening...

[serial777killers]

[ladywuvly]

— ∘☽༓☾∘ ♱ overprotective!simonriley drabble

warnings|| MDNI; 18+ content, unhealthy behavior, k!dnapping, implied attempted sa, overprotective!simonriley, p!v

not only does he not like you leaving the house by yourself, but he borderline wants you chained to the bed.

you plan a grocery trip? just give him a few hours to finish his work and he’ll go with you.

you text him that you have to run to the store? no bother he’ll get whatever you need on his way home.

you want a late night snack? "no way darling, just climb back in here under the covers with me…"

to tell the truth he’s just so protective of you. he just doesn’t want his pretty little girl to be in any unnecessary danger.

but he dreams of the day someone try’s to take you from him. he’d know exactly what to do. he did it for a living. shit, he got payed to do it.

he’d find you, probably gaged and bound, in the back of some dead guy’s van. his precious baby all teary-eyed and red faced.

god, and when he gets his hands on you. he’ll teach you exactly why you should never leave his sights…

“…isn’t that right, baby?” he slurred into your ear from behind.

he had your lower half pulled out of the van’s back door. bent over, hands still bound, spit soaked gag dragging against your hardened nipples with every one of his painful thrusts.

“c'mon use ya’ words…” but you can’t. the only thing escaping your parted lips is a breathless moan of his name.

“simon…”

“at’s right… fuck… say it again.”

“i’ll neve- ah… i’ll- oh fuck… simon…”

he pull you up by your hair, pressing you against his hot chest. slipping his hand around your hip to play casually with your clit.

“don’t ya' wanna cum, princess? or ‘ave ya’ not learned ya’ lesson yet?”

“i have! i have!” you’d cry, fresh tear cascading down your previously damp cheeks.

“please…please simon… i-i wanna cum…”

“y'know what to say darlin’.” his trusts were relentless. dragging against your cervix with each snap of his hips.

a sob was drawn from your throat before your lips babbled out the words…

“i’ll never leave you again!”

“good job, baby… good girl.” he slurs before dropping his head into your shoulder, his mouth taking hold of your neck as his thrust became even rougher…

masterlist. socials. recs.

© ladywuvly please do not steal, copy, or translate any of my work onto other platforms!

[mariespen]

Hands Off ༉‧₊˚

overprotective!rafe cameron x fem!reader summary: rafe lets his girl go to a pogue party under one condition warnings: description on injury, description of fighting, mild descriptions of assault, swearing

╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮

“You’re funny, princess. Go take your jokes somewhere else.” Rafe said, rolling his eyes, obviously annoyed as he walked out of the kitchen.

“Rafe, come on..” You started to protest, drawing out the ’n’ and sounding a bit more whiny than you wanted to. 

He sighed with irritation as he turned back around. He looked at you like you were absolutely out of your mind. You met his eyes with your own innocent look, trying everything you could to convince him to let you go.

The Pogues were throwing a party on their side of the island and of course, you were invited. Rafe already didn’t want you anywhere near them, so immediately you knew your biggest obstacle was going to be your short-tempered boyfriend. It didn’t help that he wouldn’t let you get a word in so you couldn’t even give the whole ‘convincing’ act a try.

“Baby, I said no.” He finished, walking fully out of the room and up the stairs with blatant frustration.

You walked behind him, trying to come up with a plan. You went into your shared bedroom blind, planning on saying whatever came out of our mouth first. He was already on the bed, scrolling through his phone mindlessly when you walked in.

“I’m going, Rafe.” You said sternly, quickly changing your body language to that you were standing up straight with your arms at your side, making every attempt to seem confident in what you were saying.

“No, you’re not.” He said with a laugh, looking at you like he was mocking you.

“Yes I am.” You bit back, walking to your closet to grab the outfit that you had already picked out for yourself.

He rolled his eyes from his place on the bed as you got changed, ready to turn you down again. You tried to keep your head up as you pulled on a skimpy bikini top and bottoms, covering your lower half with a detailed mesh skirt. You sighed, the colors complimenting your skin and everything hugging you perfectly. With your newfound confidence, you strolled out into the bedroom, going to start packing your purse as casually as you could muster. You felt his furious eyes on you when you walked out and you heard him sit up.

“You are not.” He said, standing up off the bed and moving to your side, grabbing your cheeks and turning your face to look at his, “Princess, you are not going to this party.” “Yes I am, Rafe.” You said, trying to keep your confidence as he towered over you.

“No, no you are not. You’re gonna stay in with me, a’ight?” He said, holding your hips and trying to pull you away from your bag.

“Rafe, yes I am,” You said, turning around to face him and putting your hands on your hips in frustration, “And you can either watch me go or go with me.” His eyes lit up and you instantly knew that you made the wrong choice of words.

“Y’know what? I think I’ll go with you.” He said with a smile, walking off to the closet just as you did before.

“No.. wait!” You called after him, walking into the closet as he picked out a more suitable outfit.

“No, no. I’m taking you up on your offer.” Rafe said casually, looking at you with a small, sly smile.

You watched him getting ready, seeing him change his shirt and button it as you stood there helplessly, trying to form a working thought. He finished, moving to kiss you at your place in the doorway. You kissed back, your mind clouding over even more as he took your hand and led you to the bedroom again.

“Ready?” He asked and you nodded in defeat, grabbing your purse off the bed.

He led you out, the house already darkening from the sunset. You slipped on a pair of sandals and he did too. Rafe kissed the top of your head before walking away for a minute, visibly grabbing a gun and shoving it into his waistband.

“Rafe, put it back.” You warned, trying to sound intimidating but he laughed you off, spinning you around and then opening the door for you.

“I said I was comin’.. may as well be prepared.” He said, winking at you.

You rolled your eyes, walking out to the car with your arms crossed. It was warm enough, but there was still a cold breeze at your shoulders and you shivered. You got in, Rafe doing the same not long after.

“Don’t look at me like that, princess.” He said, his eyes lingering on your frustrated face.

You turned away from him, sighing a bit for dramatics. You tried to stifle a laugh when he reached out, rubbing your shoulder awkwardly. You turned to meet his eyes and he greeted you with a smile, kissing you the moment you faced him. For the rest of the drive Rafe’s hand was resting on your thigh and your face was turned to the window, thoughts spinning in your head. 

It took a few minutes, but you eventually got to the party. There was a good amount of people and Rafe looked at you from his place in the driver’s seat. You looked back and he immediately pulled you closer, kissing you and sloppily leaving marks on your neck.

“Rafe!” You said, pushing him off with a soft giggle as he marked you up.

“What? Js makin’ sure these pogues know you’re mine.” He said, going back to it and you squirmed a bit, finally getting him to let go.

The two of you walked to the part of the sandy beach that the party was being held at. You looked around, a little intimidated by the amount of people that your friends had managed to bring together. Rafe’s hand was on the small of your back, guiding you through the crowd.

 You met eyes with Kiara and Sarah, feeling Rafe’s annoyance as he saw his sister there too. The two girls looked at you in shock, partly because you managed to come and the other part was left questioning why on earth you brought Rafe Cameron to a pogue party. You approached them haphazardly with a nervous smile while Rafe stayed by your side.

“Hi guys..” You said as Kie returned your nervous smile and Sarah eyed Rafe.

“What are you doing here?” Sarah spat at Rafe, rolling her eyes when he took a step in front of you.

“Protecting my girl, and you?” He asked with a scoff.

“Rafe c’mon.” You said, stepping out from behind him and talking to Kie.

“Why..” Kie started in a hushed tone, but you waved it off, walking away from Rafe to see John B and JJ.

JJ smiled at you, seeing you walking up with Kiara. Luckily Rafe was keeping a distance, finding some of his own friends to distract himself with. 

“Hey, princess!” JJ said and your eyes widened at the nickname as he walked over to the two of you with drinks.

Apparently, Rafe wasn’t as far as you thought, because the moment those words left JJ’s mouth, you felt Rafe’s protective hand on your back yet again.

“JJ.” Rafe said, greeting him for you with a glare.

“Really?” JJ said, his shoulders slumping when he saw Rafe.

JJ looked at you for help and all you could do was shrug and walk up to him.

“Hi, JJ.” You said with a smile, grabbing the drink from him and taking a long sip.

You felt Rafe’s hand come to the cup as he brought it away from your lips and took a sip for himself. You rolled your eyes, taking it back and starting to walk with Kiara again. Rafe followed you and kept a close eye on the other people around you, making sure no one said anything about his girl.

The night went on and you talked with your friends, dancing and letting the alcohol warm you up. Rafe kept a soft hold on your body for most of the time, occasionally letting you dance and instead keeping himself busy by talking with some of his friends. It was pitch black outside and you were slowly getting tired, the original energy that you had was fading off. You went to find Rafe, surprised to see that he wasn’t at your shoulder. You spun around, looking for him and separating from your group.

You felt a pair of hands on your waist, sighing in relief and going to tell Rafe you wanted to go home.

“Baby can we-“ You stopped yourself, realizing that the man who was touching you wasn’t Rafe. 

Immediately you shoved him off of you, trying to walk away. He grabbed your arm and panic coursed through your body as you felt his grip tighten.

“C’mon..” The man said, looking at you with drunken eyes, “You’re so pretty, let me see you.” You pulled against him, freeing yourself. You tried to walk away again, feeling anxiety bubbling in your chest. His hands returned to you, pulling your body into his. Tears started to well in your eyes and you closed your eyes, squirming and pushing yourself away. 

You felt his hold on you become still and you opened your eyes just as Rafe pushed him fully off of you. Rafe yelled something that you couldn’t understand and gently pushed you to the side before the man stood back up, taking a swing at Rafe, who seemed unbothered as he flashed his gun and took a few swings himself.

You’ve always hated it when he fought, so you looked down at the sand and just listened quietly to the grunts and punches, the occasional cheering becoming more common as the crowd around you became bigger. Eventually you felt Kiara grab you, pulling you away while Sarah and John B pulled Rafe off of the bloody man beneath him.

Your panicked breathing caught back up to you as Kiara pulled you away from the crowd. Your heart dropped as you saw Rafe’s bloody face, hearing John B tell the two of you to leave before the police showed up.

“Are you okay?” Kie whispered to you and you nodded, hugging and thanking her before going to Rafe.

He grinned at you, wiping a bit of blood from his lip before kissing you. You kissed back before pulling away and leading him to the car, checking on him constantly.

“Are you okay, baby?” You asked, touching his busted lip and bloody nose with caution as you walked.

“M’fine.” Rafe said with a smile, holding you close to him, “are you okay, princess?” He asked, kissing the top of your head as he unlocked the car.

You slid into the passenger seat, nodding and trying to calm your breathing. He noticed, putting a hand on your thigh before beginning to drive off.

“You’re okay, a’ight? Told you I’d protect you.” He said, rubbing your skin with his thumb.

“Thank you.” You whispered, putting your hand over his.

“Anytime, yeah?” He said with a smile, “You’re mine, won’t let another man touch you, won’t let em’ hurt you.”

You held his arm to your body through the drive, burying your face in his body the best that you could. He eventually calmed you down as you pulled up to the house. He got out quickly, opening the door for you and helping you out.

You made him sit at the kitchen island, getting out the heavily packed first-aid kit that his family kept in the kitchen. He sat still as you wiped the blood from his lips and the drops that hit his chin. He put his hands on your hips, pulling you closer to him and looking up at you with glossy eyes as you wiped the blood from his nose, bandaging the small cuts that scattered his face. His hands wandered from your hips to your back and then down to your ass, grinning up at you as you finished placing the last band-aid on his eyebrow.

“My pretty lady..” He said, kissing you with his swollen lips.

You giggled, kissing back before pulling away, “C’mon tough guy, let’s get to bed.” 

He got up, letting you take him upstairs and scattering your neck with dark hickeys the moment you closed the door. You tried to stifle a giggle, eventually pushing his head away and getting changed out of your skimpy outfit. He did the same, getting into bed after you.

“I love you, baby.” You said, letting him hold you close as your hands found their way to his hair.

“Love you too, princess,” He said, kissing your cheek and relaxing into your soft touch, “I always protect what’s mine, yeah?”

╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯

[riyo-soka]

Asajj Ventress trouncing the main characters in a fight, straight up lying to people, and deciding to get the fuck out of there so the plot couldn’t catch her is so Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) of her and I couldn’t be happier

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 215

Danny has found himself as a cat. And there’s good news and bad news about it. The good news is that he’s a magical cat or something similar, seeing as he has two tails and can go Very Big if he wants to. Bad news? He’s pretty sure they’re in a different dimension now. 

Cute news, both Ellie and Jordan are itty bitty kittens and utterly adorable, he would murder for them. They’re so tiny! Like, yeah they got physically de-aged before all this so they could properly pass as his kids- along with part of Dan’s parole- but this? He could hold them in his hands if he still had them! 

Alright! First things first, find a shelter and avoid the destroyed buildings along with whatever destroyed them in the first place. Then he could figure out if this is an accident or some sort of forced vacation. But shelter first. 

[ohdeerfully]

hiii! this is my first request on tumblr but i jus love alastor sm and there is NOT enough fics for me out there. so im asking u❤️

what abt alastor being jealous of someone else in the hotel? for example: angel dust, he puts on music and you two are dancing with eachother happily not noticing the red eyed demon with a tight grin. 🥰

Hii! Honestly after writing this I realized I didn't follow the prompt exactly, less jealousy and more Alastor being overprotective. Oh well! Hope you like it anyway :D!

Be Back Soon (i)

alastor x reader (fluff? alastor is just overprotective) part i TW: Cursing/Angel existing if you want tagged in the next part, lmk! join my discord! ═══ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ═══

Your fingers dragged down the skin around your eyes as you let out a long sight, sitting at Husk’s bar with shoulders propped on the cold counter. What a day it had been, running around in the typical chaos of the hotel as Charlie tried to get some group bonding activities finished. It was getting late, and you just finally had a moment of peace.

“‘Ey, toots!” The chipper voice broke your peace and you couldn’t help it when another audible sigh escaped you. The culprit of the broken science paid no mind.

Turning your head, you narrowed your eyes and made eye contact with the lanky pink spider. You were a little salty at him in particular, being one of the main catalysts to the everyday insanity. He had an easy grin played upon his lips as he stared back down at you with his multicolored eyes, one pair of arms on his hips that jutted out a little too unnaturally in a mischievous pose. His golden tooth glinted under his light grin with a similar air of “hey I’m up to no good right now.”

“You look fuckin’ tired!” He barked a laugh, dramatically squeezing his eyes shut in a theatrical show of laughing in your face. It really wasn’t that funny, and you couldn’t stop the frown that touched your lips as you watched him. He took pride in being the way he was. Annoying.

“No thanks to you, Angel,” You clipped back. You turned your head to watch Husk, who was leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. He had become an expert in ignoring the spider demon’s presence, which was how he managed to stay sane with said demon’s constant flirting and sexual nature.

“Anyway,” He waves away your targeted words with a wave of his hands as his eyes roll up. “I was thinkin’ we get outta here for the night? Me and Cherri were gonna have a “girl’s night.”” You briefly thought about the humor in Angel admitting to being ‘one of the girls,’ but pushed the thought away to consider his invitation. “It wouldn’t hurt ta get some fresh air. This place is real stuffy sometimes, and a huge snooze fest,” he persuaded. He rested his face on one pair of hands, fingers laced under his chin, as he leaned against the bartop in anticipation for your answer.

You purse your lips in thought. It wouldn’t hurt, right? You didn’t go out clubbing a lot, and with Angel and Cherri with you surely nothing wrong would happen. They looked out for their friends, and you would (maybe regretfully) consider yourself Angel’s friend. You glanced at Husk for a moment, as if looking for advice, but his eyes remained close and his lips had an annoyed curl. Maybe you should get out of his hair.

“Okay, okay,” You grinned, a little sheepishly. While you couldn’t really consider ‘fresh air’ to be a feature of Hell, you agreed that you needed to just Get Out of this place. Running errands for Charlie got mundane, even with all the strange characters that cycled through the place. One tends to get used to the chaos.

Angel stretched his arms up in a cheer, which earned a one-eyed, aggravated look from Husk. He uttered something under his breath before grabbing a bottle and walking to the other corner.

“Alright, sweet lips,” Angel cooed at you. “Let's get you dressed! You got anything decent up in your closet?”

Your hand found its way to the back of your neck as you answered sheepishly, “Eh, not really… At least, not for a night out. I don’t really do much outside of the Hotel.” Angel frowned at the response, tapping his chin in thought.

“Lemme take a look,” With a swipe of his arm, your hand was suddenly being held as he dragged you up the steps toward the floor of your room.

Walking down at the same time, you briskly passed by Alastor, who had his eyes closed and a hum in his mouth. His blazing red eyes peered open as you and Angel rushed past him, a quizzical furrow in his brow seeing the connection between your hands. You shot him a shy grin and craned your head back to shout a quick ‘I’ll explain in a minute,’ before you disappeared around the bend of the stairs.

You didn’t miss the dark gleam in his eyes.

Angel, in an attempt to dramatically burst through your door, slammed full body into the entrance. “Ah- the hell?” He cried, roughly jiggling the handle.

“I keep it locked,” you snickered at him and the disheveled look in his usually preened hair. You saw him take his hands to brush it out as you fiddled with the lock, an annoyed mutter of words escaping his lips. The second the door clicked, Angel shoved past you and reattempted his dramatic burst through the entrance with a bit more luck this time around.

He went straight for your closer, rummaging through this and that. What a breach of privacy, this guy is, you thought with a strained smile as you stepped up next to him to try to guide him through your very Ordinary and Plain clothes.

You felt a prickling sensation on your skin, and you swear you heard a frequency of low static, but when you whipped your head around nothing stood there. Did that shadow just move?

Shaking your head, you looked at the piece Angel held proudly in his hands, one pair of arms gripping the top and the second pair pulling the bottom out to really get a full inspection.

It was incredibly simple, but still a bit more revealing than anything you were used to wearing. A deep red top, so cropped it may as well be a sporty bra, with a couple eye-catching accents of rhinestones. Connected with thin straps was a similarly tight pair of booty shorts. Your face flushed at the thought of wearing this. It was practically lingerie.

“Isn’t it a bit, uh, tacky?” You tried in an attempt to dissuade him from this getup. He acted offended, one hand going and pressing against his fluffed chest. You didn’t miss the way he took this as an opportunity and pressed up against himself to perk up his mass of chest fur.

“Babe, I wear shit like this all the time! You tellin’ me,” He started a rant, shaking the clothes in a fit of mock rage. “You tellin’ me I’m tacky? Hah! Me! Angel Dust!” He wiped away a fake tear in his laughter.

Your face flushed again looking at the getup. With a defeated mutter you swiped it from his hands and trekked painfully slowly to the restroom. You ignored Angel’s urgency for you to ‘hurry the hell up’ because it was almost time to get going.

You slowly stripped yourself of your day clothes, gingerly stepping through the tight shorts and tucking your arms through the straps of the top. You didn’t even remember buying this thing, it had been stuffed far in the back of your closet. You couldn’t help the feeling of dread thinking about the other embarrassing things Angel might have seen in there. Though, you doubt anything could phase that guy.

You had to admit, looking at your reflection, that it did accentuate your curves, even if you didn’t have much to begin with. The rhinestone accents glittered in the bathroom light, obviously designed in a way to bring attention to the chest. The straps that connect the two pieces fit snugly against your exposed torso. You were suddenly glad Hell never got that cold.

“Almost ready!” You snapped at Angel calling from the other side of the door. You quickly threw on some touches of makeup, trying your best to compliment the shades of your outfit and adding some glittery makeup around your eyes. You quickly dragged your fingers through your hair to style it comfortably.

You ripped open your door just as fists started banging on it. Angel stood there with two arms raised, stopped midair to keep himself from decking you in the head. You glared up at him, trying to maintain your earlier sourness to hide the fact that the outfit had grown on you.

“Hey, sexy lady!” Angel teasingly leaned himself against the doorframe with a smirk. “Let’s fuckin’ go! You took too damn long! Cherri hates waitin’.”

Grabbing your hand again, he ushered you out of the room. As you raced down the stairs, you tried to continuously preen your hair to keep it from flying out of shape as Angel practically drug you down each step.

He slowed at the bottom, releasing your hand, and stepping towards Husk’s bar to aggravate and flirt with the cat one last time before heading out. You tuned out his sexual innuendoes as you tried to glance over yourself one last time.

“My, what a dame you are!” Alastor’s recognizably radio-afflicted voice ripped your attention away from picking at a loose rhinestone. He stood over you, a slight bend in his waist and an unnatural crane in his neck. His smile was there, but tight and uneasily wide as he examined you through squinted eyes. He leaned his weight against his cane.

Swallowing your unease, you examined his expression. You knew Alastor didn’t care for such… promiscuous outfits. Especially on what he considered his. You knew his compliment was satirical, and you didn’t miss that glint of anger flash through his expression.

“Heyy, Al,” You drew out your words, unintentionally accentuating the awkward tone between the two of you. He paid no mind, keeping up that seemingly cheerful grin of his as he just… stared at you. His fingers tapped impatiently on the radio of his cane, each tap bringing a warp to the frequency that always surrounded him. “I’m going out with Angel tonight. Y’know… to get some air…”

“My dear,” His eyes closed in a laugh and he straightened himself out. “Why would you ever go out there for fresh air? Now, you know those demons would just eat you right up.” A dark sneer infected his smile, lips curling and exposing the line of his black gums.

“‘Ey c’mon, Smiles,” Angel stepped up next to you and lazily threw an arm over your shoulder. You saw that sneer only deepen as Alastor watched the spider get way too close to you. “Give ‘er a break! She’s always runnin’ around doin’ shit for this bum-ass hotel! It makes her… boring!” 

You didn’t know whether or not to appreciate Angel both defending and insulting you. You decided to just ignore his comments as you watched Alastor’s expression get darker and more sinister. You felt a cold sweat prickle at your neck as that static-y frequency of his became more prominent and aggressive as his eyes swept over the two of you, lingering on your exposed abdomen with a frustrated twitch in his brow.

“Why, of course!” He suddenly cheered, brandishing his hands to his side in a slight bow. “But…” He stepped towards you, looming over you. You felt that nervous tickle again. His right hand raised and, with a quick motion, a fairly modest jacket materialized around your shoulders. “All better! Wouldn’t want greedy eyes seeing what’s mine!”

How bold, you thought. He was from the ‘30s, though, and very old fashioned. It made sense that immodest wear bothered him. Plus, you looked down at the jacket. It had a similar color scheme, and was light enough to not be too warm. At least it goes with my outfit. How sweet.

You felt a bit giddy at the permission Alastor had given you–not that you needed it. (You did). You’re a grown ass adult. (It doesn’t matter). You shot him a smile of thanks before dashing out the door, meeting Cherri who had been frequently laying on the car horn for you to Hurry the Fuck Up.

Before Angel Dust could follow, a tight grip on one of his wrists stopped him in his tracks. He hissed, yanking his arm but to no avail. Alastor’s grab was like iron, and his nails began to dig into Angel’s skin.

“Hey you fuck, let me go! I gotta get out there before Cherri starts blowin’ this shit up!”

Alastor pulled Angel in closer, a sneer-like grin crossing his expression. There was a maddening look in his glowing red eyes.

“If she comes home with even the smallest scrape,” He said in a low tone, the garble of his radio slightly distorting his voice. “I’m going to make you wish you never came to this Hazbin Hotel.”

Alastor’s grip didn’t yield as Angel tried again in a futile attempt to release himself. He had a nervous laugh in his voice as he tried to act unintimidated by the Radio Demon’s threat.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, you creepy red fuck,” He gruffed back, “Me an’ Cherri will stick right by her. You don’t gotta worry about nothin’.” Alastor’s expression shifted in an instant, his cheerful grin reappearing. He stood up straight and smiled down at Angel. “Good man! Now, don’t be too long,” He shooed Angel out of the lobby, who was more than glad to get the fuck out of there. He heard a faint ‘I’ll be watching’ from behind as he slammed the car door shut, muttering curses under his breath.

He knew Alastor would send that damn shadow of his to keep a close eye, so why the fuck did Angel have to babysit you in the first place? Plus, you weren’t some weak, naive fool. Whatever. He knew Alastor would take any excuse to cause some entertaining mayhem.

He sighed as he looked at you, who had a nervous but excited grin as Cherri rambled and cursed about something.

Maybe he shouldn’t have invited you out. He knew he was in for a long, stressful night. Good think there would be a bar.

[zylev-blog]

The batkids decide to hop on the trend.

Dick, walking as Steph records: We’re vigilantes. Of course we have to be over dramatic.

(Cut to Nightwing back flipping off of Wayne tower)

Tim: were vigilantes. Of course we have issues with caffeine.

(Cut to a video of Tim as Red Robin snoring while hanging from a grappling line. Batman can be seen in the background facepalming.)

———

Damian: No.

Tim: oh come on, Robin, we’re all doing it.

Damian: I refuse to partake in such idiotic videos.

Tim: (while Damian is still behind him) We’re vigilantes. Of course we get to punch people without getting in trouble.

Damian: actually—-

Tim: Robin, you’re supposed to play along—

Damian: I am not going to spread false information—

Steph, interrupting: well, I’m not one of Batman’s sons so he legally can’t yell at me.

Tim: wanna bet?

(Cut to Batman scolding all three of them about the improper use of force)

—-

Duke: we’re vigilantes. Of course we go to Batburger.

(Cut to Duke happily eating a Batburger meal, and playing with a Signal toy)

Duke: what? I’m allowed to have hobbies.

——

Steph: we’re vigilantes. Of course we can scare anyone we want to. Right, Black Bat?

Cass: (nod)

(The next series of videos is a compilation. The first is Superman being scared, followed by Green Lantern, Flash, Cyborg, Starfire, Dick, Tim, and a failed attempt to startle Wonder Woman. Cass isn’t even upset about not being able to scare the woman, she accepts the defeat with grace.)

——-

Dick, Tim, and Steph: we’re vigilantes.

Dick: I’ve gotten stranded on the moon. Don’t ask.

Tim: I got lost in hell.

Steph: I accidentally followed Green Lantern into space.

Tim: what? When?

Steph: turns out if you hug a Green Lantern really tightly, their life support on their ring will support you too

Dick: yknow, Batman shouldn’t find out about this-

(Cut to Batman’s lecture about the proper use of protective gear when going to space)

——

Dick: we’re vigilantes. Of course we’re best friends with all of the villains.

(Cut to Red Hood kicking down a door)

Jason: hey (bleep), you’re late to dinner

Dick: (currently tied to a chair and gagged)

Jason: hang on, I’ll help. (Shoots everyone and unties dick) Harley said she’s going to rampage if you’re not there in five minutes.

Dick: Blame these guys, not me! (Jumps through the nearest window, shattering it, and the sound of a grapple is heard)

——

Jason: I’m a crime lord

Dick: and I’m a vigilante

Jason: and you’re ruining my video, (bleep) off. (Shoves Dick out of the frame, ignoring Dick’s muttered cursing) now that we got the riffraff out, let me start over. (Brushes imaginary dirt from hands) I’m a crime lord. Of course Batman fights me every other day. I look forward to the day I can break his kneecaps.

Dick: (shocked) Hood!

Jason: what?

Dick: he’s your dad too!

Jason: yuck, don’t remind me.

——-

Duke: we’re vigilantes. Of course we know all of the gossip. (Very obviously looking around) like for example, Superman has the biggest crush on Bruce Wayne—

Clark, who was obviously eavesdropping: Nonononononono—- (trying to turn the camera off as he darts into the frame. There’s a flash of red, blue and yellow as Duke and Clark fight over the camera)

——

Tim: we’re vigilantes. Of course we visit other cities.

Wally, as Kid Flash: What the (bleep) are you doing in Central City?

Tim: I’m honestly not sure, it’s so bright that I think I’m blind.

[superbat-love]

Bruce: So? What are they doing now?

Clark: They’re sitting on the bench and eating ice cream.

Bruce: How close?

Clark: [squints] Umm, pretty close.

Bruce: How. Close.

Clark: [sighs exasperatedly] There’s a 12 inch gap between them. Bruce, did you call me here to the Batcave to spy on Cass and her date?

Bruce: Cass told me not to follow her, tag her with any recording devices or spy on her using drones or hidden cameras. I haven’t done any of that.

Clark: So I’m your tiny little loophole.

Bruce: Trust me, there’s nothing tiny or little about you, Clark. Now, what flavor are their ice-creams?

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Ghost King Phantom answers a summons to a new dimension to find a sacrificial offering in three magic circles. One, holding Bizarro, another holding Artimus and the one in front holding Red Hood.

Phantom has no idea who these people are, but he knows the people in charge must be powerful mages or whatever. Doesn't matter. None of the mages hes ever had to face had known about his Halfa status so naturally thier wards and protections wouldn't work on him. He captures the kid with a naselly voice and his orange cat in a force field to give to Jazz later. She had been talking about wanting to study the psychology of a supernatural being for a while now so he'd help her out.

He made quick work of the other mages before turning around and facing the "sacrifices" the two in the back were still out cold but the one in front, the one in the red helm was radiating terror and rage. He was shaking even though Phantom hadn't done anything to him and had no intentions to. Danny landed outside the circle, trying to whisper something conforting as he stepped closer.

The moment he stepped into the ring however, the red runes turned into a bright green and the three circles disappeared. Danny didn't feel any different so he assumed it was nothing and he freed the captives before disappearing, none the wiser that Klarion the Witchboy had made a few translation mistakes in the slave contract and accidentally married a terrified Red Hood to Phantom, the High King of the Undead and King of the Lazarus dimension, also known as the Infinite Realms.

Danny probably learns he married that guy at some point but just kinda shrugs it off. Polygamy is legal in the realms and thier marriage doesn't change much. Sure, Danny is practically contractually obligated to save this guy if he's ever in mortal peril but Danny has no problems with that. He'd do it anyway.

So he just ignores the situation hoping it doesn't come up again.

It does.

Repeatedly.

I'm so surprised we don't have more Dead on Main ghost king marriage aus where Jason/the pit inside of him is terrified of Phantom. Let's change that

[rebeccadumaurier]

cannot get over how ART had one of the most iconic character introductions of all time. in the span of 100 pages and a few weeks, it was like hey. if you mess with me i'll squash you like a bug. check out how i'm 10,000 times more powerful than you. wanna watch tv together? ah FUCK my tv blorbo died. what do you mean you won't tell me all the secrets of your dark past. can i do some surgery on you? do you need me to blow anything up? let me hijack your brain for a couple seconds. ok that went great! here's my number in case you ever need it

[deathbyfiction]

Love how he just dropped this and moved on

[palskippah]

Hi! This is a compilation of Luigi and Bowser expecting a baby jsj

@penbwl this one’s for you! For opening my eyes to this idea ajksdjasd also your art of Luigi is so cute!! :’v

[zephyrchama]

Belphegor followed you down the hall as you dragged your suitcase. It wasn’t very big, but it was still heavy and annoying to lug over the thick decorative carpets. Every time one came to an end, the luggage thudded loudly back onto the hardwood floor.

“You sure you have everything? You packed the pillow I gave you?” Belphegor sluggishly matched his pace to yours. Having long legs must be nice.

“Of course, I triple checked.” ”Good. That’s my fifth favorite pillow, so you have to come back and return it, ok?”

You nodded as the suitcase went over another bump. This was your third time going over this exact conversation.

It wasn’t just the youngest, all of the brothers were antsy about your little trip. It was written all over their faces as you arrived at the foyer where they were waiting. Satan and Asmodeus solemnly stood up from the steps they were sitting on. Mammon and Leviathan had a hard time looking at you, their eyes darted all over the walls and ceiling. Beelzebub offered to move your suitcase by the door.

Just one weekend away. That was it. Solomon volunteered to take you back to the human world for a bit. You couldn't let a rare trip home pass by, as who knew when the next opportunity would arise. You could eat some normal food for once and stock up on your favorite human things. Though, your housemates reacted like you were leaving for a year.

“Did you pack everything?” Lucifer asked.

“Of course, I triple checked.” Deja-vu.

“Even the lotion I gave you?” Asmodeus looked so worried. He loosely took hold of your forearm with a tear in his eye. “Don’t forget, the sun is awful this time of year. I’ll never forgive you if you come back looking like a lobster.”

“Asmo, I won’t.” You grinned at his silly concern and leaned in for a hug. Asmodeus did not disappoint.

Everyone else took a step forward, hoping for a hug of their own, as Asmodeus breathed into your ear, “I’ll be waiting.”

“You have my number. If anything goes wrong, call me.” Lucifer sounded so reliable as he placed a hand on your shoulder.

There were half a dozen chimes of “mine, too!” and “same here!”

You’d been away for longer trips. How in the world did these guys survive for so many millennia before you met them? You turned to look at Lucifer, wanting to counter that Devildom phones didn’t even work in the human world, but he probably knew that already.

"Don't talk to strangers," he reminded, "and don't go out alone at night. Some humans are worse than demons." He wrapped his arms around you and wished “safe travels.”

Mammon stepped up next. He forced himself to stare at you, haughtily playing off the sadness he was really feeling. His bottom lip jutted out a little more than usual. “Well! You’ll bring me back a good souvenir, right?”

“Oh? I don’t know, I might not have time…” It was playful banter, yet your words shocked him. Mammon’s eyes widened. He began stammering and gripped your fingers. You quickly performed damage control, “Joking! I’m joking, Mammon. Of course I’ll get you a souvenir.”

The younger siblings piped up, “us too!”

“I’m getting everyone souvenirs, don’t worry!” You already had a few gift ideas in mind.

Mammon put his forehead on your shoulder and a hand on your back that he rubbed. “But mine’ll be the best. I trust ya.”

“Don’t let Solomon give you any food he cooks,” Beelzebub warned. “Actually, don’t let Solomon give you any food. Ever.” He tried to give you a lumpy-looking cloth bag, no doubt filled with homemade treats to take with you. It smelled scrumptious. Only issue was, the bag was half your size.

“Beel, there’s food in the human world. I can’t take all this, why don’t you enjoy it with your brothers?”

Beelzebub frowned, setting aside his present. It tilted under the weight of its own contents. You felt a slight pang of guilt, but how could you carry it all? That much food could last you a week.

He picked you up for his hug, your toes dangling several inches off the floor until he gently set you back down. Belphegor caught you as you regained your footing.

His hug was simple and cozy. He tucked a strand of your hair behind an ear. “Don’t forget about my pillow.”

You suspected that if you ever actually tried to run away, these seven would go to the ends of the three realms to find you.

Satan nudged your luggage, observing the way it slided forward an inch. It was heavy to you, but clearly not them. “That’s really all you’re bringing? Do you have enough clothes?”

“Yes! You helped me pack!” The repetition was really starting to grate on you. Things were never this crazy when one of them had to leave the house for a few days. They wouldn't even care unless somebody went mysteriously unseen for over a week. “You all know I’ve got everything under control. I’ll be back in two days.”

“Hey, how come Satan got to help you pack?” Mammon complained.

“We did too,” Belphegor said, his twin in agreement.

“It was a group effort,” according to Asmodeus.

Mammon crossed his arms. "No way! You let these guys see your underwear?"

Satan ignored them. “Do you want another book for the road?”

“I’ll be fine.” You gave Satan his hug. After letting go, his fingers hovered by your side. “We’re teleporting there anyway. I don’t think there’ll be time to read anything.”

One suspiciously quiet demon in the back stared at the floor. “Two days,” he sighed. Leviathan did a poor job of hiding how upset he was.

“Levi, aren’t you going to say goodbye?”

“Yes!?” His head jerked up, met your gaze, and looked down again.

“I can’t leave until I get a full set of hugs from everyone,” you admitted. “I’m missing a very valuable part of the collection.”

Asmodeus and Mammon readily offered themselves for a second go. Leviathan’s cheeks flushed with envy and he grabbed you a little roughly, squishing his face into your shoulder. “You’ll take lots of pictures? A-and you won’t forget about us?”

You scoffed, “how could I forget about you? We’re bound together by a pact, aren’t we?” As for photos… you didn't know what would be interesting, but it couldn't hurt to take a bunch anyway.

Lucifer cleared his throat, signaling to Leviathan it was time to let go. "I miss you already," he muttered.

The seven of them followed you out of the house and down to the House of Lamentation’s front gate. It was like having a school of fish circling you. You could call it a miracle they weren't following you onto the main road, but if they went that far you knew they'd unreasonably demand Solomon take them along too.

“It’s just one weekend!” you reiterated. “Take care, you guys.”

They peered at you through the fence bars, waving when you glanced over. It was a sad sight, and possible attempt to make you come rushing back. If it was this bad already, you didn't want to think about how they'd act if you were going away for one week.

[gascreates]

emotional support frog

who will absolutely eat your hand.