#‘he got grounded by Barbara’

[starlooove]

I only like black tim when y’all woobify him like you do white tim (which you don’t btw)

[sistertotheknowitall]

Some Guy Bingo

Masterpost.

Nearly three months into (what Jason called) The Haunting, the siblings kinda started a game. (“Either we're haunting him or he's haunting us, I haven't decided yet." "Considering he's the one appearing randomly, I'd say he's haunting us.")

Technically Tim had started it with, “five bucks says Danny went to class today.” (Gotham university was having an out break of fear toxin curtesy of Dr. Crane.) However, it was Jason who kicked it off with, “ten if he says something about actual scarecrows.”

Dick had snorted and said, “fifteen if it’s a personal experience about a farm.”

“I call bingo if he makes a vague statement on agriculture.” So it was actually Steph who started it.

“Bingo? We were placing bets.”

“Unlike you Hood, some people don’t get adopted by money.”

“As if Bruce doesn’t give you an allowance.”

(“As if he didn’t offer to adopt you,” Tim tacked on.)

It became a running joke where they started calling out "bingo if -" whenever they had to go out on a call. The joke had later formed into a running game when Danny had told Cass, “fighting gods is a pass-time, it is humanity that the real fight is against.” (He had trip over a curb and laid on the ground for several minutes before she asked if he was okay.) She said it wasn’t the most concerning thing he said to her and Steph chimed in claiming, “on a scale of one to ten that statement rates at a three.”

Jason had asked why Cass and Steph always got the weird ambiguous statements and he got cryptic shit about his “soul”.

(Damian had pointed out that at least he wasn’t being constantly referred to as a baby.)

I Call Bingo, which they still played whenever a situation required more than one of them, became “on a scale”

Dick was sure that “having given up on optimism, I find your enthusiasm to be overly bright” should be ranked higher then “I don’t like two-stepping but I’m from the mid-west, so do you know how to line dance?” (Danny and Duke had gotten into an awkward side step where they kept blocking each other.) Damian said the wording seemed passive-aggressive but the tone was too positive to be rude so he gave it a three. Jason said it sounded like a bad pick up line and gave it a two.

They often debated and defended the score they gave with Barbara chiming in over coms. She had never met Danny as Oracle but he was a regular at the public library. He was always polite and respectful and had quickly become one of her favorite patrons. Like Steph and Cass she also got odd statements but hers felt more like half-hearted jokes.

Bruce didn't always join in on their game but it wasn't surprising to see the occasional score placed in their reports. (They had a file dedicated to Danny's remarks. Originally it was to keep track of what they knew about him but at this point it was just to let the others know what he said this time.) Alfred was roped into it even if he didn't really participate unless asked. ("Hey Alfie, what would you give 'i'm glad i don't have to fight my food to eat it but if Batburger keeps giving me the wrong thing I'm summoning Lunch Lady.' Cause Tim says two but I think it's a five.") (He gave it a four.)

Post 4

[onmyyan]

Ain't no sunshine chapter 3

A/n: canon typical violence someone gets stabbed (not you) feedback is always welcome

The clock ticks in an uncomfortable rhythm, almost pounding in your ears, you swallow around nothing and try to take a deep breath, only a few more minutes now.

Sitting cross cross felt childish but you needed the comfort of being low to the ground, before you stood a proud grandfather clock, the thing always intimidated you for some reason, maybe it's because you could smell how expensive it was, how priceless, but it was the only room in the house you could guarantee would be free of any nuisances, aka your estranged family.

A lone little Debbie cupcake in hand, a candle in another, you stick the candle inside the soft flesh of the treat, lighting it with the silver zippo, the seconds begin to count down as the wax melts, today was your eighteenth birthday, and the day you'd find true freedom. A day you'd been waiting for since you'd decided to wash your hands of the Wayne's and all who associated with them.

Bruce had begun to add to his collection of broken people one by one a new face was added to the house, and one by one you were met with the same cold indifference.

Barbara Gordon came into your life warmly, on the arm of Dick, she was kind to you in the beginning, making a point to ask you questions and listening intently when you answered, immediately you admired the older woman, her charming grin and bright demeanor was like a light inside the house, until she became who you eventually discovered was Oracle, tied up in the world of heroes and monsters, she too joined the club of exclusion, unintentionally forgetting plans the two of you had made more often than not, sharing inside jokes with Dick about last night's patrol or even taking on a mentor role for Damian, each action like a stab to the heart.

The last straw felt like the smallest one. And it came in the form of Cassandra Cain.

The girl came to the family under reasons you couldn't know, but she was troubled, you could see the same look in her eyes you had when you looked in the mirror as a child, she didn't outright reject your friendship like Damian, but she was seemingly as disinterested in you as the rest of your family, the real kick to your heart came when you walked past a moment shared between her and Bruce, he was comforting her, you couldn't hear the words spoken but you could feel the love pouring from Bruce, how he had a gentle hand on her shoulder, showing her a kind of love he'd never once shown you.

It wasn't her fault and you held no grudge against her, but it still felt like a slap to the face, and every time you saw her, every time she followed them down to their little hiding spot, the acid-like sting deep in your chest got worse. It was then you made a promise to yourself, you'd stop trying, no more reaching out to Dick or praying Jason would message you back, no more begging for Tim's attention or Damian's respect, and you were sure as shit done asking Bruce to love you.

You're brought back to the present moment by the loud ring of the clock before you, the echoing sound brought a ear splitting grin to your face, finally, you were done.

Blowing out the candle, you toss it on the floor, standing with a pep in your step. You'd had your bags moved out days ago so the only thing left was to leave. A chatter could be heard the closer you got to the front door, male and female voices happily spoke with one another, but you were so unfazed, too excited about your current plans to care they'd gathered without you on your birthday.

"Oh hey (Y/n)" Dick says after spotting your form in the doorway, see the only reason you were here is because the dining room lead to the front door, and your new found freedom.

You nod at him, taking in the sight of popcorn and half empty pizza boxes, a movie projected on the wall, ah so they decided to have a little get together?

None of your concern.

"Sorry we didn't call you down, didn't realize you were home" Dick says a look of pity in his eyes, "do you want some?" It's almost said with a wince.

"Nah." Was your simple response, and with that you walked out of their door and lives.

You'd bought an apartment with your own money, you'd been working since you were fourteen, saving every penny for this moment exactly. It was in a shit part of town with an even shitter interior but it was yours and you loved it. Water dripped into a mostly full bucket in the corner, the lights took a full forty seconds to turn on and it reeked of old cigarettes.

Yet you couldn't wipe the smile off your face.

Feeling that euphoric rush had you buzzing all night, besides the bed in your room was, questionable to say the least, so you decided to stay up. Cleaning what you could with what you had made you feel even better, this terrible little space was all yours, no condescending people or assholes in sight.

Feeling hungry, you throw on a black puffer coat and a matching beanie and start to brave the Gotham cold. Each step is taken with a new gratitude, the farther you get from that family the better you feel.

Your happiness is pulled to a grinding halt by the sound of rapid footsteps behind you, without thinking you turn, fist balled tightly in perfect form, Patty would be proud if she saw the way you decked the bastard running up on you.

You nailed him right in the throat sending him to his knees, his knife cluttering to the ground before your feet, grabbing the weapon you point it down at his choking body, your hands still despite your rapid heartbeat. The wheezing man made a swipe at your ankles causing you to bring the knife down right into his shoulder, a scream rips though his throat, the adrenaline in your body has you running on autopilot.

Kicking him in the side of the head to quickly sprint to the corner store where you'd planned on going in the first place, your hands shake as you grab your food, but again, that smile stays on your face.

Not only had you moved out today, you'd proved to yourself you didn't need them for anything, not protection, not validation, nothing, it was like you could breathe again.

The next few weeks are business as usual at the manor, until Barbara looks at the calendar and realizes she'd, along with everyone, had forgotten your birthday. The guilt ate at her until she made her way to your room knocking softly, a cupcake in hand she called out, "(Y/n)? Listen I'm so sorry about your birthday, I got my dates mixed up." The lie came easy, but no response was heard, "I get if you're completely pissed at me, at us but-"

"Miss (L/n) has moved out."

"what? How is that possible we would have noticed her moving out." As if to prove Alfred wrong Barbara opens your door, only to find a barren room, empty of any signs of life. She turns to the older man, a thousand questions burning on her tongue, but he seemed to read her, "you'd be surprised what goes unnoticed in this house miss Gordon, have a good afternoon." He leaves her with this and it only makes the guilt and confusion worse.

She pulls out her phone scrolling to a number she hadn't used in a while, biting her thumb as it rings she's hoping you clear all her confusion when you answered, but you don't, instead an automated message tells her your phone has been disconnected. Now she begins to worry, you were so young, just barely an adult, the idea of you out on your own in Gotham had her heart sinking, clicking the family group chat she sends a message that will change everything.

"We need to talk about (Y/n)."

[qcomicsy]

The Office but it's the Batfamily.

Bernard (To the camera): I think Bruce hates me.

---

Bruce (to the camera): I am very glad Tim, found himself dating someone. I don't think there's someone who would ever be enough to any of my children.

Bruce: But he is happy. So I am happy as well.

---

Bernard, invited over to dinner: That's. . . Um, A very nice mansion you have here sir. Really big. Big enough to hide an secret passage to clones but–

Tim, gesturing to him to shut the fuck up: HAHAHAHA ISN'T HE FUNNY?! (whispering) ᴮᵉʳⁿᵃʳᵈ ᴵ ˢʷᵉᵃʳ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ.

Bernard: WhichI'mnotimplyingyoudoanyway. But– IT'S NICE. Really nice. Thanks for uh inviting. . . Me.

Bruce, glaring: Hn.

---

Bruce (to the camera): Dick told me to make a "chit-chat". Be sure that our guest felt welcomed.

---

Bruce (to Bernard): Did you gave it a thought about your internship yet? When I started medical school I had a great interest on how Gotham's Hospital deals with post mortem patients.

Bernard:

---

Bruce (to the camera): I tried to find a common ground to make conversation. We both had similar majors, even though I've drop out

Bruce: I'm glad it was enough for a good starter.

---

Bernard (to the camera horrified): He wants me dead.

---

Dick (to the camera): HOW WOULD I KNOW HE WOULD PULL UP THE SERIAL KILLER TALK??–

---

Steph (to the camera): There's something really uncanny in seen it happen to another person.

Steph: And also really fucking funny too.

---

Kory (to the camera): The first time I got there I'm pretty sure was the time he made a contingency plan for me.

Kory: Which is cute. He thinking it would work but– Yeah.

---

Barbara (to the camera): Me and Dick? Oh he stopped talking to me for several weeks.

Barbara: When he did, he said "You are making a mistake".

Barbara:

Barbara: Don't you hate when he is right?

---

Kon (to the camera): I wasn't aloud to enter the house– I when I dated Cass, so–

Kon: Not that stopped me. But it still hurts.

---

Cass (to the camera), shrugging: I liked his piercings.

---

Bernard: . . . I didn't– Yet. No sir. I'm just, huh. . . Going with the flow?

Bruce: That's unfortunate. It's really important to always have a plan.

Bernard (gulps): You think?

Bruce: Yes. You never know what might happens next.

---

Damian (to the camera): It was the best dinner I've ever attended in this house.

---

Tim (to the camera): *Loud sight* I don't know what I was expecting.

---

Jason (to the camera): Are we really just going to pass on how his boyfriend looks like a knock off Scooby-doo member?

Jason: Like he is rocking a StarStruck haircut– And we just?– Okay.

---

Dick (to the camera): I mean it's not like Bruce is doing on purpose right?

---

Bruce, grinning to the camera: Hn.

---

Duke (to the camera): Oh he's absolutely doing on purpose.

[galaxymagitech]

Reasons the Robins got in trouble at school:

Dick: What hasn’t he gotten in trouble for? He once got suspended three times in the same month: First, he fought three older students for bullying another kid. Then he got dress-coded for wearing a dress to prove a point to those bullies, Bruce interfered, and he instead got suspended for kissing Barbara in the hallway. Finally, he got suspended for climbing on the roof to retrieve his backpack, which said bullies placed there, and then doing a somersault to the ground. The ongoing war lasted for three months and resulted in several black eyes, two expulsions, and an administrator getting arrested for tax evasion.

Jason: He got into a fight only once, which his enemies left with several bite marks, broken bones, and mild insanity. No one dared fight him again, and he’s very polite in class.

Tim: Received detention for sleeping during class and then got two more detentions for not showing up to the detention because he fell asleep in the middle of hacking it out of his records. Also, he’s climbed out of the window every time his guidance counselor attempted to speak with him, but no one can prove it.

Steph: She got dress coded once. Once. Refusing Bruce’s help, she roasted the school administration, started a social media campaign, and ended up staging a protest with Duke’s help. The detention was stricken from her record, but in celebration she made the fire sprinklers rain purple glitter and got suspended for that. She accepted this sentence with grace.

Damian: Got detention for insulting the teacher the one time he wasn’t actually saying something insulting. He also attempted to start a fight club at recess, but quickly grew bored of it.

+ Barbara: Got detention for texting during class (she was actually hacking into the pentagon, but semantics).

[nyursi]

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐋𝐘!

꒰ † ੭‎ㅤNSFW 18+ㅤ(MDNI)...  well, the favonius church's choir had a spectacular ensemble. one stood out in particular.ㅤノㅤnot proofread.

ᡴꪫ‎ TODAY'S SPECIAL!ㅤkaeya alberich.

WOULD YOU LIKE SPRINKLES? (っω=`)ㅤm!rdr, religious themes,  kaeya jacks off to you cause he's horny, drabble.

                 ㅤ ⏝꒷۰꒷⏝꒷۰꒷⏝꒷۰꒷⏝

Call it irony or whatever, but the fact that Kaeya still attended church while drunk and out of his mind was pretty funny. Of course, considering that Sister Rosaria was no better than the Cavalry Captain— Kaeya let go of all his guilt and entered the Holy grounds anyway.

Besides, spending an hour in here was all worth it, as Kaeya had his eye on a special someone.

You were close with Barbara, and a few months younger than Jean, so your relationship with the sisters certainly helped you settle in Mondstadt. A long time ago, when you first came to the humble city, Kaeya was oddly pleased to see a feline roaming the streets. Save for Diona, who was too busy handling the Cat's Tail.

And you can call him weird, obsessive, strange. But can you blame him? With your honey-toned voice constantly singing during Mass— who could resist the urge to hear more? Truly, locals adored you. Even if there was a whole ensemble in the stands, it was you who stood out and took the spotlight. Kaeya was no better.

It was just another day for him. Rosaria was his close friend, and since she paid for the booze he drank last time, he owed her. And thus, when she asked to accompany her at the Church, Kaeya begrudgingly complied. Really— he was so ready to take a seat and get some shut eye. They arrived a few minutes earlier, so what harm could be done?

Not 5 minutes passed and he was already awoken. "Uhm, excuse me...?" A soft voice he heard. Gentle shaking on his shoulder. Kaeya hummed, not ready to wake up just yet. Nonetheless, he opened his eye, ready to throw some passsive agressive remark at whoever dared to stop his slumber.

But shit.

"Sir? Mass is starting soon, it would be very disrespectful to sleep through it!" Not a word made it through Kaeya's ears, too busy listening to the angelic melody that suddenly praised him when he looked at you. Clothing that those in the Church wore daily, something so innocent, pure and white, somehow became unholy with the way it clung to your figure. He couldn't help the way his eyes trailed down, down, down, til' they landed on your shorts.

Tight and snug. They barely looked like shorts with how high up they were. But Kaeya wasn't complaining— not at all.

And fuck— was that a thigh belt? Kaeya gulped, seeing the shining vision dangling on your thigh. To keep himself from any more thoughts, he quickly looked up at you.

Ah. You were staring.

Did he look weird? Was it obvious he eyed you like some treat? As if he were a kid, drooling for candy? Or did you find him handsome? Attractive like he did you.

"Ah, my apologies. Thank you for waking me up." He chuckled, scratching his scalp as if he were guilty. You crossed your arms and pouted, lips puckered and Kaeya had an urge to suck on them. "It's alright, but please be more attentive. We're starting soon." You reminded, before turning around, heading to the stands.

And if you felt a burning glare on your behind, Kaeya prayed you believed it to be your imagination.

Safe to say that first interaction guaranteed many more to come. Kaeya was greedy, a selfish man who had not one, but two addictions.

Alcohol was just his mistress.

So he kept coming. Anytime he could, Kaeya attended Mass like he was a Saint. Rosaria called him crazy, but he couldn't deny that claim. He would go mad if there was not a single glimpse he could catch of the cute singer.

He found it funny how something so innocent managed to catch the attention of a dirty man.

One time, you made a particular face when the sun got caught in your eyes. Your eyes squinted, lips pulled in a small frown, and Kaeya imagined that to be the face you made if he ever came on it.

Yeah. He was fucked.

At some point his right hand became sore with his nightly activities, accompanied by the repeating scenarios in his mind that fueled his desire even more. Kaeya couldn't wait any sooner.

He wanted you. He needed you.

Kaeya attended the next days Mass, clean as ever. As if he didn't spend last night fucking his fist to you, until the sun rose. Groaning and wishing that it was you around his cock, not his left hand. (He had to alternate.)

He couldn't handle it. Every time he saw you, thoughts would pop up in his head in the most random places. He walks past you in the streets? All of a sudden he imagines breeding you on the cobble path. A glimpse of your cat ears from afar? He dreams of tugging and biting at them. The worst one that ever happened was at Church.

Kaeya frequented the place so much that you eventually grew a friendship. Greeting him whenever you saw the tall, sunkissed, eye-patch wearing man. One time, while waiting for Mass to start, you actually sat down beside him to talk. He had to fight off a boner.

One of the Deacons dropped the long candle, and you, ever kind and pure, stood up to get it for them. Soon as you bent down, Kaeya shamelessly eyed your butt. He always did that, but what caught his eye were your cute little balls, snug against the thin fabric of your shorts.

Either they were that tight, or you decided to go commando.

Kaeya hoped it to be the latter.

Not only was he blessed with the sight of your buttocks, full and plump, but your round balls too. Kaeya wanted to pinch them. Squeeze, suck, fondle, put them in his mouth— he didn't care. As long as he got to touch your sweet cheeks too.

If holding in a boner while taking to you was hard, this was a lot more extreme. Not to mention your cute tail; that dangled and swayed, urging him to pull on it.

"Oh dear! Sir Kaeya! You're bleeding!" You exclaimed, hurriedly taking out a cloth napkin from your pocket. Wiping at the blood that dribbled down his nose. "Are you alright? Perhaps you should miss out on today. Please get some rest."

He didn't even fight back, too shell-shocked at the fact he got a fucking nosebleed from that. But hey, at least he has your napkin!

And if he returns it to you the next day; sticky, crumpled, and wet? Don't question it.

vanillaclaws 2024. do not repost.

[bbbbbbbbatman]

Annual Mandatory Batfam Camping Trip

Bruce started the tradition after adopting Dick of going out camping one weekend every summer to try and have a more "normal" family bonding thing

Yes, it is mandatory for all members of the family, even those not currently living in the manor

It is universally hated by all the children except Cass, she thinks it's so fun

Everyone except Dick, Damian, and Cass are all city kids and prefer it that way, thank you very much

Dick was so excited the very first trip and that excitement lasted until approximately one hour into trying to set up the tent (it took nearly two hours total), he's dreaded it every year since but won't say anything bc it makes Bruce so happy

Damian thinks it's unnecessary and uncivilized to sleep on the ground for no purpose other than "fun" (he fails to see what's so fun)

Alfred never goes on this trip, he does a bunch of the packing and prepping and then pushes them all out the door with their bags, Bruce asked if he wanted to come the first year and Alfred said a very polite and British version of "fuck no" and he enjoys his annual weekend off

Barbara was also invited but refused, saying she wasn't technically part of the family and therefore didn't have to go

(Steph tried using the same technicality, but was outvoted by Tim, who wants her to suffer with them, and Cass, who gave her puppy dog eyes, nobody was brave enough to argue with Barbara)

There are three tents: Steph and Cass in one, Bruce, Dick, and Damian in one, and Jason, Tim, and Duke in one

Jason has a scar of his shoulder from the time they tried fly-fishing and Tim's hook got hooked on Jason and Jason will never let him forget it

There is a ban on any kind of traps or hunting after Duke got stuck in a net Damian set up to "protect" them from bears

Tim and Dick always struggle to open the bear-proof trashcans

Every single one of them hates hiking except for Jason, but all of them are too prideful to ever admit it so they all suffer through at least two hikes each trip

Cass' favorite activity is swimming in the nearby lake, it's always refreshing and there's lots of little fish swimming around

Bruce made them go geocaching one year and they split into two groups to compete and both groups got horribly lost

Damian hates almost every part of the trip except each morning he wakes up really early and quietly sits at the edge of a nearby field to watch dear go through, his best memory was when they went in the spring one year and he got to see two fawns and their mothers

[lordgrimoire]

The Goonion would like a Word

Bruce had never had an experience like this before, letters of ransom from any of his rogues? Certainly! But the Goonion only ever left messages when they were paying bail for their own, and he was becoming worried as to why Jason’s Goons had posted a message to him via The Goonion.

“To Batman of Gotham, New Jersey, United States of America, We would like to have a word with you in regards to a pair of Meta Adjacent individuals we would like to harbor here in Gotham, we are only extending the courtesy to you regarding them due to the fact that the United States Government refuses to acknowledge them as people due to their conditions, the Boss said he would tell you himself, if he has not already he likely will soon. Suffice to say a family of three is coming to Gotham as their last chance at a safe harbor and we would prefer it if you did not get on their cases. We hope to receive your response without any broken bones, The Goonion, Gotham, New Jersey Branch.” Tim was staring at the paper, the stationary of The Goonion, with confusion, Dick, Barbara, Cass, and Stephany seemed rather accepting of it, and Damian was confused. 

“What is this, Goonion?” His youngest asked, staring at the paper as Bruce read over the return address, the Iceberg Lounge, a server named Thomas. 

“Ah, we haven’t told you about them yet have we?” Dick began, sitting back. “They’re nice folks, help get the Goons payed and are usually the ones to put their feet down when Rogues get outta hand for normal folks, for instance, the Joker does not have the stamp of approval for, many reasons. But primarily it’s due to his former Henchmen, including Harley, snitching on him to the Goonion.” Dick typed something into his phone, Damian’s own device pinging in his pocket, likely more info. “The Goonion has an odd relationship with us, we don’t go after them and they try to keep things regulated, Jason could probably tell you more, and it seems from the letter we do have to talk to him.” The door to the cave opened, and while Bruce looked up to see his second son come walking down the steps he seemed, tired, run down even.

“The Goonion already got to you? Good on them.” Jason huffed as he sat next to Damian, ruffling the boy’s head much to his exasperation and attempted swatting. “Situations fucked, the letter doesn’t even touch on the bigger parts but it gets, real fucky like, possibly gonna want to get Uncle Clark and Aunt Diana in on it fucky, definitely Constantine as well.” Well Bruce knew his flags rather well and if Jason was advocating for not only a League intervention but one headed by John Constantine? Bruce decided to address the original topic first. 

“They can stay, but they will have to answer questions.” Jason huffed and leaned back. 

“Ground rules then, the two younger kids? Meta Adjacent? They have a similar situation to me, and it turns out Ra’s is playing with not even a tenth of a full puzzle with the Lazarus Pit.” Everyone around the table stiffened, save Alfred who had come in behind Jason with a tea service, as Jason took a sip from the mug placed before him and nodding to Alfred. “Thank you. The details are spotty but the abridged form is this, the Lazarus pit is the remains of a bunch of people from a dimension to which we all go when we die, the residents therein call it the Infinite Realms since it services everyone that means every Person who has a faith or doesn’t has a place there. Furthermore these three’s parents who passed recently in a Government Sanctioned raid made a Portal to the Infinite Realms, and Lazarus Water? Corrupted, dirty, a literally soul eroding form of what makes up matter on that end of the divide, Ectoplasm.” Jason withdrew a vial from his pocket, a bright green and sluggish substances was held within. “This is pure ectoplasm, The Parents, a pair known as Doctors Jack and Madeline Fenton, introduced me to a Doctor from the Infinite Realms, suffice to say I am feeling much less angry and far more at peace with things, though apparently being angry is normal for the type of “Dead but Brought Back” I am.” Jason placed the vial on the table and slowly pushed it to Bruce, taking his hand back when he reached for it.

“Jazz, the eldest, is a student at Gotham University, or she is now, identities and the like will be handled later but for the younger two it’s time for some non starters, because apparenlty if you ask an Ecto Entity or anyone touched by the Infinite Realms how they died it sets off a “I Must Kill You Now” trigger in their head, essentially forcing them to suffer their deaths all over again until they deal with who or whatever asked the question, so no being a little nosey punk about it Tim.” Tim jolted at his name being said instead of Jason’s nickname for him but he nodded when he realized that his elder brother hadn’t looked away from him. Bruce was still proud the two had started to mend things so well, but as he stared at the vial a question swirled in his mind.

“Why did the Goonion send a letter then?” Jason stiffened slightly and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Alrighty, so you know how I’ve been going to College classes since a year ago? I met Jazz at one of them, as Jason Todd, son of Bruce Wayne and card carrying member of Red Hood’s Goonion. This was, sometime around Spring Semester, soooooo” Steph lunged up, mouth open with a squeak until Cass pulled her back down. Jason sighed and continued. “We started dating last year, she wants to be a psychiatrist and maay have started working for The Goonion in Star City when one of their guys ended up on her mentor’s patient bench. Her academics are already transferred to Gotham U but she’s still looking for a new Mentor.” Bruce made an affirmative noise at that, encouraging, Jason was holding something back, the younger siblings hadn’t been named yet. “The Goonion hired her former mentor and Jazz followed them in since they have really good benefits, and she has experience with the whole Capes and Crooks thing already. Though she told me she would rather she and her siblings explain that.” 

So, Jasmine Fenton, after being a student for at least a year in Psychiatry, became a Goonion Psychiatrist, and then when her Parents died she takes her younger siblings, one of whom is rather recently adopted into the family by the looks of it, and flees her hometown, one Amity Park Illinois, which has a disturbingly blank file in the League databanks. “Yeah,” Jason began, looking over at the Batcomputer, scanning the total lack of data from two year ago on. “The Government locked their hometown down quick, they have a branch called the Ghost Investigation Ward, who managed to get a law in before our current Shining Dome of a President, was sworn in, apparenlty old Lex has been trying to rip that law to shredds since he found out about it and there’s something akin to a coup attempt going on from the GIW towards Lex. I looked into those guys already, I think it would be wiser to side with the current President and not a bunch of Loons who would dissect Uncle Clark and his kids if they got the chance.” Damian jerked slightly, turning to face Jason.

“What?” 

“Yeah, Krypton is dead it’s a dead world, by some of the smaller parts of the Anti-Ecto Acts that means that all Kryptonians are ecto-beings and by that law have no sentience, and are just emotions imprinted on ectoplasm, given the fact I died once they would pick me up as well in a heartbeat, for “disposal” as they call it.” The room had become Still, Dick seemed furious, staring at the damning lack of info alongside a pale Tim, Damian who was still staring at Jason realized just why his brother had looked back to him and was also looking at Cass, they had been brought back by the pit, they were by Federal Law non-sentient. Bruce felt the arms of his chair bend slightly under his grip before breathing out his frustration. 

“You have a plan?” Jason nodded, he seemed to be expecting worse, you really didn’t give him a reason not to, and began speaking.

“The Goonion will be dealing with protecting people who fall under the acts, we just need the JL to take this problem and light it on fire, drag it into the public eye and raid a few of the GIW’s bases that may have people, both from our side and theirs, in captivity. I will be going tonight to get Jazz and her Siblings from a bolt hole of theirs, an Aunt in Arkansas whose bound to be investigated is hiding them, I just need to borrow something.” Bruce allowed an eyebrow to climb up his forehead, he wants to borrow the Batplane for it.

“I’ll allow it, go and get them once it starts to become dark out, I’ll expect you back by dawn, do you have a place set up?” Jason blinked at him before nodding. 

“Yeah, one of the safer corners of Crime Alley, closest part to Gotham University, three bedrooms, two bath, someone maaay have helped me pick it out.” Bruce nodded, he would get nowhere in trying to guess which of his other children, Alfred, or any of Jason’s friends, or even some of their own collectively reformed Rogues could have helped Jason in this, but suffice to say it was a safe harbor and one backed by some rather tough figures. The Goonion alone would give anyone trouble, but with them being in Crime Alley that meant that they were essentially in an invaders nightmare. Dead ends, construction, dilapidated or abandoned buildings, it was a natural ambush site. Jason then put a box on the table, it was a scanner of some sort. 

“One of the reasons they’re coming here is this,” he flipped a switch and the machine began to frantically beep, practically sounding a long tone before Jason flipped it off again, “Gotham sits on a similar point to Amity Park, and as such we are LOADED with ambient ectoplasm, constantly stirred up by magic based curses of one sort or another it essentially blinds ectoplasmic tracking devices.” Bruce nodded, accepting the device as it was pushed down the table to him. “Jazz had apparently decided that they would run to Gotham if things went sideways like this anyways, we’re the closest ambiently effected city to Amity not ringed by GIW outposts and scanners.” Bruce paused in his observing of the machine, the GIW had surrounded other cities that had high ambient ectoplasm?

“Where?” Jason pulled out a small notepad.

“Well, Jazz wouldn’t tell us, but the Goonion has it’s ways, The GIW has encircled the following cities, Salem, Boston, and Springfield of Massachusetts, New Orleans, New York, Philadelphia and Gettysburg of Pennsylvania, Chicago Illinois, Savanah Georgia, D.C., and then San Francisco and San Antonio of California and Texas respectively, I asked for this list at 6 this morning, I was handed this current version at Noon, these were just the overt ones. Metropolis, Bludhaven, and Gotham, are currently not surrounded, there are locations between them but not many.” Bruce stood, watching as addresses were placed on the table, each assigned a sticky note and details. 

“You should get ready to go get Jazz and her siblings, we’ll deal with this.” Bruce tapped on the sticky note closest to him. Jason nodded and stood, following Alfred out of the Batcave as Bruce looked to the rest of his family. “We have targets, we have details, Tim, dig up what you can on the GIW, Damian, Dick, Cass, Stephanie, your with me, we’re going to raid as many of these places as we can tonight, Barbara,”

“I’ve got comms, got it.” She interrupted, rolling over to the Bat computer and preparing for daylight operations 

[yeetus-feetus]

Batfam incorrect quotes (vines)

Dick: everyone's been asking about you Damian

Damian: then keep asking! That whole family cast me out Dick!

Dick: only because you think you're straight

Damian: I am straight!

Dick: well you can tell that to mom, and mom, and your sperm doner dad, and dad's boyfriends, and-

•

Tim: so I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties-

Steph: *falls to the ground and dies in a fit of laughter*

•

Kon: Don't tell your father

Tim: kiss one another

Kon: die for each other

Tim:❗❗❗

•

Dick: *throws Jason's gun away*

Jason: what the fUck RicHaRd

•

Jason: hello Tim.

Tim: hi, Jason.

Jason: That outfit looks familiar...

•

Duke: toss me my keys

Duke: ... I said my keys!

Steph: I thought you said printer

Duke: now why the fuck would I say-

•

Cass: what did you get for question 12?

Barbara: I got 18

Steph: I got 9.5 ???

Dick: I got Abraham Lincoln ... for some reason. I don't-

•

Damian: Don't fuck with me! I have the power of God and anime my side! HYAAAAA!!

•

Jason: iis there anything better than pussy?

Jason: yes! A really good book!

•

Reporter: where do you keep all your gadgets while fighting? It's incredible!

Cass: Belt.

•

Damian with his new hairstyle: stop saying I look like Tim! He's dumb and he's a coward!

Damian: AND I'M NOT A COWARD!

•

Kori: hey babe, happy one year! <3

Dick: ??? I'm 27

(they're idiots your honour)

•

Jason, about Bruce: his hair, wack. His gear, wack. His car, wack. His footsteps, wack. The way that he talks, wack. The way that he doesn't even like to smile, wack.

Jason: me? I'm tight as fuck!

•

Duke: WAKE UP SLEEPYHEAD!!

Tim: what? What's going on!?

Bernard: what the fuck man?

Duke: 😱🤭!!

•

Jason: hey everybody, today Tim replaced me so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be-

•

Duke: hey how y'all-

Titus: *growling and snarling*

Duke: AH! get your fuckin dog bitch!

Damian: it don't bite

Duke: YES IT DO!

•

Barbara, watching Dick and Wally through the cameras: two bros chillin in a hottub 5 feet apart coz they're not gay

•

Jason: in the League of Assassins, we got-

Damian: 👶

Jason: whose baby is you??

•

Dick: this chicken is almost as juicy as my ass

Cass: 🤨?

Bruce: 🤦

Alfred: 😐

Everyone else: 🙄

•

Tim: you wouldn't like me before my coffee

Damian: that's so weird because I fucking hate you all- Everytime.

•

Jason: HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR ME!!

Bruce: THAT'S MY OPINION!!

Dick: 👁️👄👁️

[glow-worms-are-believers]

Universes Contained (dp x dc)

Barbara was coming on her sixth day of staying glued to her screens, taking a nap here and there and eating whichever snacks she’d remembered to bring. First, it had been a Birds of Prey emergency which had kept her up for four days, then Dick had called in a favour for a case, and she’d gotten roped into being his on-call support. She’d used the little downtime to continue her monitoring of the hidden monitoring devices squirreled away in different evil lairs and coming up to her actual office and do some work as Head Librarian.

In short, sleep had been scarce and as she rolled down the ramp of the side entrance to the Gotham City Public Library - because management still hadn’t put one in front despite her many reminders - the fatigue felt like a physical weight dragging her eyelids down. The ground was wet from the recent rainfall and Barbara had the absent thought that it would be a pain to clean up the marks she was about to leave in her apartment. She reached the end of the ramp, and just as she was about to get out of the slight dip that hid the ramp, she saw something out of the corner of her eyes.

Before she even turned her head, the hair on her nape rose and something like disquiet spread. As she did turn, her eyes landed on a shadowed corner of the alley. In the low light of the distant street lamps, she could see water faintly gleaming amassed in a deep and unfathomable puddle. As she squinted towards the flooded depression she felt as if the glow was in fact coming from within rather than reflected. She was proven right in the next moment as the water started to lighten to a neon, acidic green. It was as little more than a reflex to the damned color that Barbara reached for her batons she kept within her wheelchair armrests. As she closed her hands over the batons, the glow started to die down. Still, she waited, motionless, a few controlled heartbeats going by. A moment passed, with no sound except Barbara’s own almost silent breath.

Then, there was a ripple in the puddle. Her grip tightened.

And then from the water emerged - something.

It was unbounded, limitless and so monstruously massive. Barbara had seen the stars from up close, or at least, closer than most would in their lifetime, but this was more than stars, more than galaxies. This entity, this thing was universes condensed into an eye-searing form; infinite, yet contained. She could see stars, countless, dying, emerging, exploding and the gaping empty titanous space between each of them, stretching into incomprehensible distances. Pulsar, quasar, blitzar, she could see them all, infinitesimal amongst each other and colossal within themselves.

Barbara could not look away, her own body feeling far and distant as she drank in the impossible sights. She didn’t know how long she stood still, transfixed, before the being shifted, and all the cosmos shifted with it.

Then, like an imploding star, all its infinite edges started to collapse into themselves. There was a sudden, bright light that had Barbara blinking away, half-wondering if the blindness was permanent only for her sight to come back within seconds. And as it did, her eyes landed on a small and - absurdly human form.

Because where the impossible entity had been now stood a small pale teenager wearing worn jeans and a white T-shirt.

“Whew,” she could hear him breathe out in an improbably human voice. “That still feels weird.” Then, with a ruffle of his deep black hair, he skipped out of the alley, not once noticing the frozen vigilante.

As the being got out of sight, Barbara realized she had not breathed through the experience and she took in a much-needed gulp of air. She sagged into her chair weakly, absently noticing the slight shaking in her hands.

Apparently, there was a new arrival to the city.

Barbara let out a slightly hysterical giggle. Let it never be said Gotham was boring.

[satyricplotter]

(suggestive, slightly explicit content at the end)

Even though you’ve been expecting the visit for most of the night, the Red Hood knocking at your balcony door at 1 in the morning still catches you off guard. You scramble off the couch in a sleepy daze, book falling off your lap and cracking open on the floor. For one long second, the only thing you can think of is that whoever your last assignment was has managed to find you, that you’ve finally been too sloppy and left a trail with which to track you.

That’s your first thought. Your second thought is, of course, Barbara. But before you can reach your phone to shoot your boss a SOS, or, at the very least, an alert, a second rasp at the window panes freezes you on the spot.

“Will you open the damn door?” Red Hood’s unmistakably robotic voice grits out. “It’s raining cats and dogs out here.”

You trip in your rush to open the doors, limbs loose and clumsy with relief. Hood shoulders past you with a grunt, fingers prodding at the back of his head to get at the latch of his helmet. He takes it off in a smooth motion, his hot breath forming a white cloud against the cold air of your running AC. You lock the balcony back up after him as he goes around your apartment, setting his helmet on your dinner table and shrugging out of his jacket. He means to stay apparently. You could’ve lent him an umbrella if he wanted to go back out there. Probably would’ve been best.

See, you don’t like the Red Hood much.

He invites himself over to your kitchen, opening cabinets here and there until he chances upon the dinnerware and pulls out a glass. The Gotham public infrastructure is in such state you have never once attempted to drink out of the tap, but you don’t stop him when he does. It is, technically, allowed. And he had the pitcher full of filtered water right under his nose, so. You wait impatiently as he downs two whole glasses of tap water and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand (there is a perfectly usable kitchen towel draped over the oven handle).

He glances over, notices you staring. The corner of his lips quirks up. “How obedient,” he mocks. He pats at his sides, pulls a folded envelope from somewhere in his body (the Bats have endless pockets, you’ve come to learn) and tosses it on the table. “There’s your file. You better be fucking thankful. Traipsed through half the city in this shit storm just to get you these.”

“Thank you, Red Hood,” you say politely, picking up the rumpled envelope and eagerly flipping through the files. “Much appreciated.”

Red Hood rolls his eyes at you, eternally put off by your insistence on following the proper channels of conduct. “Whatever. You got anything to eat?”

“Help yourself,” you tell him.

You walk back to the couch with the file in hand and leave him to make himself whatever he will, already too distracted by the information within to care that you’re gonna have to make a second grocery run when he’s done with your fridge. Red Hood rummages through your cabinets, pulling out far more stuff than he should for a midnight snack. At one point, he asks if you’ve had dinner, and you respond him with an absentminded (and truthful) negative. The files he’s brought are the latest Robin’s swiped from the team’s ongoing investigation on a dicey arms exchange deal that may or may not involve three out of four of Gotham’s biggest conglomerates (sans, of course, Wayne Enterprises). It’s your job to process the info—a task too menial and too tedious for Oracle and Red Robin, respectively, to handle. Besides, Tim’s far more useful on the ground.

It must be about twenty minutes of you pouring over the pages scattered over your coffee table when the man speaks up again. “Dinner’s ready,” he says.

You look up to see him setting two plates of steaming stir fry on the table. He’s taken off his gloves, his utility belt, the domino mask and rolled up his sleeves—the whole nine yards. Only missing the apron. The food looks lovely, but of course it does. Cooking is listed as a specialty in Red Hood’s file, right along with marksmanship and hostile takeovers.

Your lips quirk up at the unexpected kindness, but you shake your head. “None for me, thanks.”

“I said,” Red Hood says, placing his gun on the table menacingly. “Dinner’s ready. Come eat.”

Well. So much for kindness. You’re about as dumb as Red Hood’s subtle, which is to say only at your benefit and very much at will, so you only sigh and push the papers aside. He watches you rise and sit, and pick up the fork, before he does the same. You eat in silence.

After a few bites, you stop being disgruntled at his coercion and grateful that he’s got something other than a protein bar in you because you were, in fact, quite hungry. That’s not something you can say—or at least not in any way which he would accept, so you just shut up and eat your meal happily. That seems to be enough for him, as he watches you finish the whole plate with a satisfied expression.

“Good?” He asks.

“Yeah, actually,” you beam.

Even when he stands and brings the dishes over to the sink to wash, you are reluctant to leave your spot at the table. You watch him rinse and sponge the plates and pan, the knife and spoon and cutting board, and your afternoon tea mug. He washes his hands thoroughly and rinses his mouth with the dubious tap water again. A thorough, judicious man. He’s played remarkably nice this evening. You wonder if Oracle’s been pulling his ear to leave you alone.

When he finishes, he walks slowly the remainder of the narrow hallway of your kitchen back to the dinner table and leans against the threshold. The long line of his body catches you off guard, always so unexpectedly graceful despite his musculature, his brutality. You hold his gaze serenely, trying not to cave under his scrutiny.

This is why you don’t like the Red Hood. Every time he looks at you, he sees you wholly. As you are. Not, crucially, as you want. It has been this way since the first time he laid eyes on you—a single glance and he had taken the measure of you. No further explanation, no time to make amends. And what’s worse: he expects you to be honest. He expects you to say what he can read in your face. He doesn’t let it go when you deflect, when you coat your truths in niceties. He wants it raw and open.

You can’t play dumb with Jason Todd.

He breaks the silence first. “Were you expecting Grayson this evening?”

The non-sequitur catches you so off guard you break eye contact accidentally. What’s Nightwing got to do with anything?

“No?” You say, evidently baffled. “Nightwing’s been off-world all week. Why would he be coming around?”

He cocks his head to the side, sucks in the bit of flesh below his lower lip. "So you knew it was me who'd be coming around?"

"Obviously?" What is he going on about? He clearly doesn't believe you, either. It's childish when you stomp your foot and whine, but he always brings out the worst in you. "I'm serious, Hood. I've been waiting for you all evening. Just you."

Jason pushes off the wall and approaches, staring you down with slightly raised eyebrows. “Then, if you knew Dick wasn't coming with, what are you looking so fuckable for?”

Despite how much it bruises your pride, you cannot help but sputter. The staring is one thing, the passing brushes are another—even the stupid pulling at your pigtails like you’re both in kindergarten is… permissible. But this? Coming at you so straightforwardly when all you know how to do is circumvent and hide? Desperately, you respond to the one thing in that sentence you can make sense of: the accusation.

“I don’t like Nightwing,” you whine. Jason fixes you with a look of dry incredulity. You huff. How you despise him. He can’t even let you lie. “And I don’t dress for him either.”

“Hm.” He reaches over to pull at the neckline of your admittedly skimpy top, his knuckle brushing against your chest. “Sure.”

You bat his hand away, and stand up, but that leaves you much closer to him than you expected. Or wanted. “This is not fuckable,” you grit out. “This is… pajamas.”

Jason cranes his neck to take a close look at you, every bit as assessing as the first one had been. One of his large hands comes to play with the hem of your shorts, pushes it up just a smidge, and the pads of his fingers are rough and calloused against your outer thigh. Your eyelids flutter, and he has the nerve to smile.

“That’s a blatant lie, you know,” he says, dipping his head low so the words brush against your lips. “Try a little, huh?”

“This seems like a you problem, my guy,” you snap, so close you might as well be speaking into his mouth. You need to get away. You don’t.

Jason’s smug when you gasp after his hands close around your ass and bring you forward, flush against his body. The hardness in his pants trapped between you, a pressing weight just below where it should be. Should be? What are you—but Jason adjusts before you can scold yourself, lining up your crotch with his and grinding. It feels bigger this way, which is insane because it's already pretty fucking huge, and a hot flash of desire runs through you lightning-quick and just as obliterating. You slump against him, head on his shoulder.

“That’s my problem,” he murmurs against your ear. His thumbs press just under your asscheeks, playful. “You gon’ do anything about it?”

[incorrectbatfam]

If the members of the batfam wrote memoirs or essays about themselves, what would their opening hooks be?

Dick: *record scratch and freeze frame* So you're probably wondering how I ended up here.

Jason: This is the story of how I died. Don't worry, I got better.

Tim: It all began on the day of my actual birth. Both of my parents failed to show up.

Damian: A caution to those who have an inferiority complex: stop reading right this second. The Homeric epic of my life will only make you feel more useless.

Duke: According to all known laws of city planning, there is no way a city like Gotham should be able to exist. It's infrastructure is too weak to build its fat little buildings off the ground. Gotham, of course, runs anyway, because the city doesn't care what humans think is impossible.

Cullen: The first rule of Tumblr is you don't talk about Tumblr.

Stephanie: ...I can explain.

Cassandra: Hi my name is Cassandra Wu-San Black Bat Orphan Cain and I have short bat-colored black hair (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-shoulder and cold black eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like an Asian Amy Lee (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to the Biblical Cain but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m a bat but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a vigilante, and I live in a comic book city called Gotham in New Jersey where I’m the second Batgirl (I’m twenty-four). I’m a goth (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black bodysuit with matching holsters around it and a black leather jacket, yellow fingerless gloves and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside in Gotham. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of Rogues stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

Barbara: Do you ever look at someone and wonder what is going on inside their head?

Harper: A long long time ago in a city far away...

Carrie: Bruce told me I can't insert audio so let's just say you got Rickrolled.

Kate: The definition of gay? Me. The definition of disaster? Also me. My picture's in the dictionary twice, suck it.

Alfred: In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and more bat-children. And at this point I'm not so sure about death.

Selina: "Mom I want Bruce Wayne" "We have Bruce Wayne at home" The Bruce Wayne at home:

Bruce: Look behind you.

[celaenaeiln]

do you ever think about how canonically in the batman v superman movie/universe, dick grayson is the dead robin and bruce never picked up another kid which eventually led to him killing superman?

YES?! YES! YESS!!!!

If Dick were to die, Bruce would completely break. He wouldn't just stop at killing villains - hell no - he would start killing heroes too.

All that's going through his head is that no one deserves to exist if Dick is gone.

And knowing me, I will always gladly provide the evidence.

In the comics when Dick got shot, Bruce's world imploded.

He felt such a strong rage, he kinda lost it. He flew to another country, defeated assassins, and trucked through the freezing blizzard in Russia to get to KG Beast.

Batman (2016) Issue #56

The utter, undiluted rage on his face.

Batman (2016) Issue #56

He lost communication with Alfred. He's completely on his own but nothing will stop him in his crusade to avenge Dick.

He finds the assassin and they have a massive fight. KG Beast is actually one of the highest paid killers in the world. Him, Lady Shiva, Deathstroke, Deadshot, and someone else are the top 5 of the villain world and Batman almost loses until-

Batman (2016) Issue #57

He shoots a grapple gun into KG Beast's face! He breaks him. He leaves him paralyzed.

His horror at what the Joker has done to Barbara is gone in the face of his hatred for what happened to Dick.

Batman (2016) Issue #57

Batman willingly and knowingly paralyzed someone despite knowing the cost. That's how much he hated him. But you think it stops here? This is just the tip of the iceberg.

Batman (2016) Issue #57

And this is where it all goes to hell.

Batman, the vigilante who beat his own son for killing criminals, leaves this criminal for the dead.

The Gotham commissioners talk about it

Batman (2016) Issue #60

Forget Batman. JTTF stands for Joint Terrorism Task Force. They actually considered a hit on Nightwing an act of terrorism.

That's how much the world loves Nightwing.

The moment KG Beast shot Nightwing, he became the Nation's Public Enemy Number One.

Commissioner Grogan hates KG Beast so much for what he did, he can't even bring himself to say the man's name, too revolted by his existence. Gotham hates the guy more than they hate the Joker.

Batman (2016) Issue #60

Commissioner Gordon offers some hope that maybe Batman knew but Commissioner Grogan - he just says maybe. I don't know, it's possible but - to which Gordon just stays silent. They both know what happened and what Batman did but confirming it out loud? Batman's not supposed to kill.

So Batman left KG Beast to die but Bane? The one who ordered the hit? He-

Batman (2016) Issue #59

And when Gordon tries to stop him-

Batman (2016) Issue #59

He. Punches. Gordon.

He hurts his friend and ally. The man who helped him the night his parents were murdered. He punched for his pain over Dick.

This is where it all connects to the Superman vs Batman movie. If Dick were to die, Bruce would kill his own allies in the end. He would raze the world to the ground.

In the comics, Dick's death is the turning point for Batman (2016). After this he enters a series of nightmares where his brain turns a nightmare of Selina dying to be exactly reminiscent of what happened to Dick, and even though Dick lived, Bruce can't let that go. Then the fight with Bane who targeted Dick solely because of his importance to Dick, and then the Joker War where the Joker tried to use Dick because of his importance to Bruce, and the Gotham War where Dick thrashing him was Bruce's breaking point from his toxic self and finally self-realization.

Damian once said Dick leaving to become Nightwing caused Bruce to lose his moral compass, and that's even more true now. He's breaking enemies and allies left and right just because Dick almost died.

Imagine what would happen if Dick really did.

[pinkiemachine]

GOTHAM FILES: SEASON 4

Jason Todd is dead. Bruce Wayne will never be the same. He stops going to and hosting galas, the paparazzi haven’t seen him in months—his own company hasn’t seen him in months—and the only times his closest friends and family ever see him is when he’s Batman. He’s barely left the Cave. He’s barely eating. He’s not talking to anyone. He’s beating villains to a pulp even more than usual, and he’s obsessed with trying to track down the Joker. This time… it might not matter if he’s set himself against killing… this time… maybe he just doesn’t have the self control. He wants revenge. Everyone is worried about him, and not Dick, not Barbara, not even Alfred can get through to him.

Enter Tim Drake (13).

Tim was a rich kid who lived in the same neighbourhood as Bruce—just down the road at another fancy-pants house with wealthy parents and a lavish lifestyle. The most notable thing about him, however, is that he’s got a genius level IQ… and he’s a fanboy of Batman. He had scoured the internet for clips of him caught on tape, had written a college-level paper about him in high school (Because he got moved ahead two grades), and at the moment, he’s getting worried about his hero. If what he’s seeing is correct, Batman is… starting to go off the deep end. The last criminal found by the police was barely breathing, which is not the Caped Crusader’s style. Something is wrong. Tim wants to find some way to talk to him (1, because he wants to meet his hero, and 2, because surely these extreme take-downs have a reasonable explanation, like there’s another vigilante in town doing this, or something). The deeper Tim goes, the more the name Bruce Wayne keeps popping up. It’s mostly just coincidences, though—the two of them never crossing paths despite the fact that Batman has saved Wayne Ent. before, Bruce Wayne coming back to Gotham after vanishing for eight long years, and then just a few months later, the Batman rumour started, stuff like that. But again, Tim can’t count them as anything more than coincidences… until he hears his parents talking about their neighbour Bruce. He hasn’t been seen or heard from for a long while now, and when they tried to phone, to ask if they could invite him over for dinner like old times, the butler said that Bruce wasn’t accepting any invitations right now. And this on the heels of the recent Robin vanishing? Tim had to check it out. Maybe Bruce was funding Batman’s exploits—like they were working together?

So one day, after school, he goes and spies on Wayne Manor. The rumours are true—Bruce does only have one butler. Weird for a guy as rich as him, especially in a house as big as this. And sure enough, he never caught any glimpses of Bruce in the manor, despite the fact that the butler had made it sound like his employer was home. Tim can’t be there all the time, though, so he sets up cameras to monitor the house. The next day, he finds the cameras all broken laying on his bedroom balcony. Now he’s even more determined to figure out what’s going on. So he hides one more camera extra well and he manages to catch a glimpse of a dark car that looks a lot like the Batmobile leaving the grounds of the house, but not on the main road. He has to do some triangulating and other smart stuff to figure out where the car had come from and eventually discovers a hidden entrance. To what, he’s not sure, but he’s getting excited. So he uses his big brain to fiddle with the wires of the special door he finds behind a waterfall and then he follows a dark tunnel into—THE BATCAVE. He’s flabbergasted. This has been here all this time!? He spends way too much time down there, geeking out, then tries to get a grip. He doesn’t know when Batman will be back, he has to decide what he’s going to do now.

Batman gets an alert that one of the secret doors to the cave is malfunctioning, so he heads back. He runs into the cave, expecting a criminal, but instead finds a 13-year-old boy sitting at the Bat Computer, waiting for him. Immediately, Batman tells him to get out. Tim tries to ask a few questions—respectfully, at first—like, are you okay? What happened to Robin? What’s been going on with you lately? But he sort of answers his own questions now that everything’s been laid out in front of him… and the Robin suit is right over there, in a glass case. Batman continues to get more and more aggressive with Tim, trying to physically force him to leave and threatening him and his parents if he ever thinks about spilling his secret identity, and just like that, Tim is banned from Wayne Manor. But he’s not giving up. His hero needs saving. He needs a Robin. (Or, that’s how he views it, anyway.)

While Tim was in the cave, he thought about stealing some gadgets, but he knew Bruce would catch him. Instead, he stole their blueprints on a hard drive and makes his own *improved* versions. He also makes his own Robin costume and away he goes, sneaking out one night to find Batman in Gotham. Which he does… followed immediately by Batman getting angry at him again and telling him to go home. Tim stands his ground, though. He’s not going to leave his side until he knows that Bruce is okay. This isn’t him, this isn’t Batman, he needs a reality check. He needs to be a hero again! Over and over this happens, with Tim pressing in more and more, following him around on missions until finally Bruce breaks. Silently, he takes Tim to the cemetery where Jason is buried. Tim pays his respects. Bruce asks if Tim has ever lost someone he cared about. Tim says no. But even so… he doesn’t want to lose Batman. Bruce hasn’t realised it, but he’s been making an incredible difference in Gotham. The streets are, by and large, getting safer. The police force is starting to shape up. He’s inspired other vigilantes to rise up, like Batgirl. He’s saved the world with the Justice League! He’s a hero! Or, at least, he was… until he started going dark. Maybe he just needs to take a break from being Batman for a while—

“No!”

Bruce won’t let Tim finish. He could never stop being Batman. Batman is the only thing keeping him going right now. It was his training that kept him from tearing himself up over his parents death, it was being Batman and saving the world with Robin that helped him get to an even better place, and right now, if he stops fighting, the only thing he’ll be left with is the empty Manor and memory of Jason and how he couldn’t save him. Tim takes his arm and invites him to go on a little trip. Tim’s dad sometimes takes him out to their second house in the country where they go fishing at the lake. It’s quiet out here. The trees are nice. The water’s nice. Tim and Bruce just shoot the breeze and catch some fish together. And Bruce… doesn’t have a terrible time. Tim can be a little pushy and he might think he’s got all the answers (when he really doesn’t) but he’s a hoot to watch when he tries to be “outdoorsy.” He’s not exactly the best at setting up his rod, or casting the line, or catching the fish, or basically anything to do with fishing, so Bruce ends up having to help him out, and… it turns into a nice little day trip. Bruce isn’t healed… and he’ll probably never heal… but at least… at least now he doesn’t feel completely alone. Tim makes sure that he never feels alone. He keeps following him on missions, and Bruce eventually just accepts that he’s got a new Robin now. But he’s not going to make the same mistake twice. He’s very strict with Tim and makes sure that he never disobeys orders. If he puts one toe out of line, he’s done.

On into the season we go, meeting new villains like Cluemaster, and also new heroes, like his daughter, Spoiler. She was fed up with her abusive, criminal father, and decided to help out Batman by spoiling his elaborate schemes. Once they helped take down Cluemaster together, Spoiler began to pop up again… a lot. She’d developed something of a crush on Tim, you see. And he was about to meet his match in terms of someone who’s persistent. Bruce thought it was very satisfying karma.

Nightwing and Batgirl are both let back into Bruce’s life over time, and things begin to move forward again.

The Hush storyline takes place in this season.

THEN Tim’s parents find out about his vigilante shenanigans and force him to stop, prompting Spoiler to temporarily take up the mantle of Robin. But then she and Bruce get into trouble, and Tim sees what’s happening live on the news, and he knows that he has to do something! Tim’s struggle to remain loyal to both his parents and his duty as a crime-fighter leads him to have a big argument with his dad. Like, “if you put on that mask again, we’re cutting you out of the will” kind of big. Which then escalates to, “I’d rather be poor and save Bruce’s life than be rich and let him die!” Which then leads to Tim getting kicked out. His father secretly hopes that this method of “tough love” will snap Tim out of the stupid ideas he’s got in his head, and that sooner or later he’ll come running back, but… all this does is hurt Tim tremendously. But there’s no time to wallow just now. He’s got to get to the Batcave! He goes, he helps save the day, Batman and Spoiler are alive, she hands the title of Robin back to Tim, and Tim explains about his situation to Bruce. When Bruce tries to fix things, though, Tim and his dad refuse to speak to one another. For the moment, it looks like Tim will be staying at the Manor.

Throughout this whole season, though, something’s been brewing in the background. Ra’s is moving again. He’s been popping up a little bit here and there over the last few seasons, but it’s nothing noteworthy. No big schemes… except for when he tried working with the Joker back at the end of Season 3. Ra’s was trying to cook up a new plan that involved Jason, but it had to get scrapped when Joker went off script and blew up the building. Now Joker’s on Ra’s “I don’t like you” list. Which is an extensive list. Anyway, Ra’s does still want Bruce to marry Talia and join the family business, so before the funeral, way back when, he went and stole Jason’s body in the dead of night. Jason is then brought to the League’s secret headquarters in Nepal where it’s revealed how Ra’s has been able to master all these fighting forms to perfection: he’s hundreds of years old! And he’s been keeping himself alive using a secret “Fountain of Youth” called the Lazarus Pit. With it, he brings Jason back to life.

DUN DUN DUN!!!!

END OF SEASON JUMP SCARE!!!

Oh, and after this season comes THE NEW TEEN TITANS and YOUNG JUSTICE!!! See, Tim gets a look at how the TTs are kinda not really teens anymore… and the team hasn’t really been active for a while… shoot, one of the members is a Justice Leaguer now. So he comes up with the idea for Young Justice, the B team as it were for the Justice League. Meanwhile, he revamps the Teen Titans (the NEW Teen Titans) and sets it up as like a training thing for young superheroes who might go on to join Young Justice or The League. ✨

Stay tuned for more!

Part 5 👇

Part 3 👇

[gilbirda]

Personal coach Red Hood

This one goes for @impyssadobsessions, for giving ideas and encouraging me to write this!

Part 1 || Part 2 - Part 4

-----

It was supposed to be your pretty standard run-of-the-mill bank robbery with hostage situation. He had it under control, and told the others that if they dared swing in and “help him out” he would shoot on sight. Given that there were civilians involved, and they weren’t quite sure if he was serious or not — and Oracle confirmed that everything seemed okay via the security cameras — he was left alone tying up the robbers in peace.

That was until a hostage made the stupid mistake to be brave, or a fucking idiot if you ask Jason, and tried to rush one of the guys before Jason had a chance to subdue him.

Who exactly shot first, he couldn’t be sure; but in the following chaos and screams Jason had to prioritize making sure that no one innocent was caught in the crossfire, which gave the perps the chance to escape.

With a sigh, he connected back to comms. “So… “

“They escaped, right?” Barbara’s tone was flat. Which was code that she was laughing at him.

“Yeah…”

“And you want me to alert the others.”

He sighed again, doing a final sweep just in case another hostage got funny ideas. “Yeah…”

Barbara hummed in his ears. It wasn’t a good sign. “Maybe that’s not needed.” And before he could ask what she meant, she added: “Your stalker is already on the move.”

Jason felt cold just before he was flooded with anger. Of all the stupid things! She had put herself in harm's way so many times and now she pulled something like this? Did she have a deathwish?

He rushed outside to prevent a very probable murder to find —

“Hi!” She said again, a giant smile on her face, waving one hand. “I saw them escape so I jumped in, I hope you don’t mind.” She started talking at a high speed. “So I was following you but couldn’t get inside in time and when the lockdown happened I just thought maybe you’d need backup or something? There were some guys on the rooftop but—”

“What the hell were you thinking?” He growled, maybe louder than he intended.

She blinked and got quiet. Finally.

Even the usual crowd of curious civilians watching from a safe distance stopped murmuring.

“Are you that stupid!?”

Jazz blinked again. “What?

He tried to pinch his nose, but forgot he had the helmet on. He chose to rub the helmet instead.

“Do you want to die?” For some reason this amused her, which really didn’t help her case. “Stop following me around and strong-arm yourself in dangerous situations like this!”

She frowned. “But I’m fine? I can take care of myself.”

She lifted her hands to show she was still in one piece, but Jason grabbed her right arm and pulled her towards him. Her hand was bloody and her knuckles were red, probably going to bruise.

“What’s this, then?”

“That’s not even mine,” Jazz rolled her eyes, but tried to pry her hand out from his grasp. Jason didn’t let go and grabbed her left shoulder next, growling when Jazz whimpered. “Okay that was me being distracted.”

He let her go and pushed her away. “If you show your face in my territory again, woman, you’ll pray you left when you had a chance.”

He turned around and walked to the knocked out guys on the ground, not caring if Jazz — if she was still there watching him. It was better for everyone if she abandoned the idea of vigilantism, or training with him or whatever was supposed to make sense in her head.

When the police arrived, she was already gone.

---

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[wayneskluv]

peraltiago!au — part 1 — j. todd ¡! ❞

pairing: jason todd x f!reader

warnings: none currently

summary: the tension that engulfed the belfry was making the atmosphere almost unbearable, any one could sense the stress coming from each vigilante–specifcally you and jason todd.

two months ago, you had made a bet to see who could stop the most crimes or take down the most criminals whilst on patrol. If he lost, he had to give you his motorcycle, that was his absolute pride and joy, and if you lost, you had to go on a date with him on said motorcycle—which, according to you, would be the worst thing in the world. though bruce didn’t necessarily approve of this bet, even he had to admit both of you had done exceptionally well and your arrest rates had both significantly improved since the bet had begun.

a/n: uhhhh part one finally sorry it’s so short but i’ll post the next one soon

YOUR FIST flew straight into the already-bloody face of one of jokers thugs, your elbow raising behind you to collide with another’s gut, knocking the air out of him.

whilst you were distracted, you don’t notice four particularly strong looking goons approach you. one grabs your elbows, and the other hooking his arms around your knees, the other two standing menacingly on guard for if you even attempt to put up a fight. the weird gotham stench that lingered in the air started to blur your vision, and your head feels as if it will split in two. your kicks and struggles do nothing to aid you, and eventually you stop trying. you had rather decent fighting skills, but the truth was, they were just stronger.

just as you give up, you drop to floor with a swift movement, a comically loud thud echoing in the alley. you glance upward slowly, trying to make out the dark figure in the pale light. “you’re welcome.” you’d recognise that smug voice from anywhere. “i believe that means i’m up by, what was it?” jason pauses in mock-thought, tapping his gloved finger to his masked chin. “oh, right! four.” you can’t see his face, but you know all too well the cocky grin that was plastered on his face.

“there’s a week left, clocks ticking.” you hear a low chuckle from above you before his hand reaches out to help you up. you reluctantly take his hand, using your knees to push off the ground—you could feel the bruises from where you had been manhandled by the thugs.

“thanks.” you mumble under your breath, swallowing your pride for a moment to be polite—he did just save your life, who knows what the joker would’ve done once he got his hands on you.

jason’s leg swept the leg of a goon, knocking him on his arse. his palm comes into contact with the temple of one of jokers henchmen, quickly slamming his head into the wall.

you almost laughed at how easy he made it for you. he was beating up the tough idiots, whilst you were interrogating a crook in the corner. when you’d got the information you need, a sweaty jason stumbled over.

you click your tongue, “so nice of you to join us.” the smugness in your tone matches the exact same one he used nights before.

he lets out a sigh, though he has to admit the banter is amusing. “i believe that’s a point in my favour.” you tap your head set, signalling the oracle.

barbara’s exasperated voice comes through the headset, “yeah, i added it to the whiteboard already.” she was as fed up as the rest of the batfamily. at first, it was entertaining, but with a week left, you’d both become insufferable with your competitiveness and the teasing.

you tap your headset, rather out of breath with a thug beneath your shoe who had chosen to stupidly struggle. “two minutes to spare, and i’m up by one. admit defeat now, jason.”

his voice comes through, “oh no.” the tone isn’t worried at all, infact, it’s rather smug—and you just know he has that shit-eating grin plastered all over his face.

“damn straight, ‘oh no.’ oh no, why aren’t you worried?” you were trying to convince yourself he was trying to psych you out, there’s no way he could beat you.

almost on cue, you hear various thudding noises and muffled grunts. oh no. no, no, no, no. “i just took down twelve goons total, accept your fate.”

you bite back almost immediately, “never.” but there was nothing you could do about it now—and you just know he is going to be a dick about it. he begins counting down from ten, whilst you repeat the word ‘no’ like you’re batman with his robins.

when he finishes counting, a loud fan fare plays throw your headset, causing you to flinch at the deafening sound. (great job jason, not like that would alert your position or anything)

“y/n y/l/n, will you do me the honour, of going on the worst date of all time? you have to say yes.” he said, a smirk crossing his lips as he could only imagine the look on your face.

you groan in frustration, but a bet is a bet. “yes.” you breathe out—almost as if that was the most painful you’ve ever had to do.

“yes! she said yes!” he says, followed by a chorus of cheers through the headset—mainly because everyone it was finally over.

“come out, it’s date time. it’s time to date.” his voice sung out from behind your door, the tone he chose to deliver his words in showed that he wasn’t trying to hide that fact he was enjoying this immensely.

you press your lips tightly together before reluctantly stepping outside to the image of him next to his motorcycle. “jason, this dress is ridiculous.”

“c’mon, there’s plenty of embarrassing to do, and only a few hours to do it.” his cocky grin never falters, and you wonder if it physically hurts to be such an obnoxious douche all the time.

“do i really have to wear this all night?” you ask, gesturing down at the ridiculous dress you are wearing. he wasn’t poor, he was the son of bruce wayne for gods sake, but he chose this tacky, cheap dress just to spite you—you can’t really be mad, you’d do the same if you were in his shoes.

“you know the rules. i decide what you wear, what you eat, and where we go.” he says with a broad smirk, “oh, and one more thing.”

you raise your eyebrows, unsure if he’s gonna say something actually genuinely serious. “no matter what happens, you’re not allowed to fall in love with me.” the teasing tone almost makes you laugh.

a smile spreads across your face, and the tenseness of your shoulders deflates. “won’t be a problem.”

tags: @duchessdaisybat @blum0rph0 @b4tm4nn