#and tim and bruce do NOT have time for it

[clockwayswrites]

(Not Exactly the Haunting of Danny Fenton)

Tim's PowerPoint

“Drake, why are we here?”

“Because Bruce told us to be,” Tim said, eyes focused on the interface set in the meeting table. Damian was like a dog, too much eye contact and he took it as a challenge.

Damian was thankfully silent for about two and a half seconds. Then, “And why is Todd here?”

Jason tossed some popcorn in his mouth, talking around it. “Cause this? This I have to see.”

Tim resisted the urge to sigh. It would just encourage them both. He went through his PowerPoint one more time. Neither of them would allow for mistakes. He didn’t give a fuck what they thought of how he provided the information, but it would have to be right.

Which was annoying with a complex concept like polyamory.

“Right, let’s get started so that we can get this over with,” Tim said as he sent the PowerPoint to the big screen. “Dick is apparently in a new relationship.”

Damian tilted his head. “He finally saw off with that that absurdly cheerful vagabond of a Speedster?”

Don’t give them the satisfaction of sighing. “No. Dick is still dating Wally. The two of them have agreed to try adding another person to their relationship. Bruce wants to make sure nothing is said to ruin the new relationship, hence this PowerPoint.”

“Adding another person?” Damian asked, nose all scrunched up. “Why?”

“Because Polyamory,” Tim said with a grand gesture to the screen where the Pac-Man ghosts were standing with heart eyes under the word.

“Are you Clyde?” Jason asked.

“What? I’m ignoring you, you’re not required to be here,” Tim said and clicked the button on the laser pointer-slash-remote to go to the next slide. It was a rather artistic shot of what Tim was ninety percent sure was a pigeon orgy. The Merriam-Webster definition was over the picture in yellow:

polyamory noun

poly·​am·​ory ˌpä-lē-ˈa-mə-rē

plural polyamories

: the state or practice of having more than one open romantic relationship at a time

“Like much of nature,” Tim started as the picture behind the definition rotated between different animals from cats to frogs to cows and more, “some humans and humanoids participate in polyamory. There are, in fact, alien humanoids that engage in polyamory or polygamy as the primary form of relationships. If you are interested in a more detailed look at these alien races, there are links in the third slide.”

The third slide was the Clipart of the classic ‘little green man’ head with several footnote citations to various Justice League files. So maybe they shouldn’t have all that information, but Tim didn’t have a back door into the Justice League system for nothing.

“Considering that Dick, Wally, and their new third are all human, we will be focusing on the typical and basic human configurations of polyamory.”

Damian’s hand shot up. Raising his hand was, thankfully, a rule that had been made after the fifth time someone had been stabbed.

“Yes, Damian?” Don’t sigh, Tim reminded himself.

“Animals have the need to produce a large numbers of offspring. They also do not possess the same emotional processing powers as humans,” Damian stated. “While, perhaps, multiple partners assist in both the amount of offspring, but also the dispersal of genetic make up for animals, modern humans do not share this need.”

“…correct,” Tim agreed warily.

Damian kept his hand up as he continued. “I was also under the impression that if one is to be with a romantic partner long term, that the partner should be someone that one is romantically interested in and emotionally invested in.”

“Oh, he’s adorable,” Jason cooed.

“Raise your hand or shut up,” Tim said. “Yes, that’s generally correct, though there some other forms of relationships that are not romantic. We will cover some of these shortly.”

Damian nodded as if actually satisfied. “Then why would someone want to share?”

“Cause sharing is caring,” Jason said with a snicker.

“Ignore him,” Tim said, “and we’ll turn back to the slides! There are a few different types of standard polyamorous relationships! The first we’re covering is open relationships.”

On the screen, the words ‘open relationships’ went around in a circle like a train.

“In an open relationship, a member or members of the relationship are free to date, or otherwise engage with, whomever they might want to.” Tim clicked the buttons a few times and the main circle connected to other circles, some that spun and others that did not. “These other relationships may also be open or may be closed—limited to only a select amount of people—depending on the other person. These open relationships may also have certain rules in place or be completely open depending on the agreement of those in it.”

Tim clicked over to a rather scrunched list of rule examples. Maybe Tim made it purposefully unreadable so that he didn’t have to answer Damian’s questions about sex. Maybe.

“Why?” Damian asked. He sounded so confused that Tim decided to answer even though Damian hadn’t raised his hand.

“Lots of reasons. A person may want to experiment with other gender combinations. Or they may have different or more emotional, romantic, or physical needs than one partner can support.” Tim hurriedly clicked ahead to his slide on asexual and aromantic individuals. The background was a loop of hundreds of bouncy balls. Tim had no reason for that, he’d been losing his mind by then. “Asexuality and aromanticism run on a spectrum of course, but at a basic level, asexuals do not experience sexual attraction. They may be sex favorable or sex avoidant. So, for example, they might have an open relationship with their partner, so that the partner can satisfy their sexual needs.

“An aromantic individual does not experience romantic attraction, so again we might see multiple partners to satisfy the diverse need of the aromantic themselves or their partner.”

Damian frowned and tilted his head, but stayed quiet. Interestingly, Jason was also frowning slightly.

Tim moved on hurriedly and backed up to his intended slide. “Now, by contrast a closed relationship either does not add new partners, or partners are added with the approval of all members of the relationship. As a major simplification, this can be thought of as a series of arrows or triangles.”

“Now with arrows, the agreement and negotiations are still there, but everyone can be dating different people!” Tim said. Green Arrow stared back at them from the next screen. Tim thought it was particularity fitting, knowing what he knew of Oliver Queen. “So A might be dating B and C. And B is dating A and D. D and A are not dating. They might not even really be friends. Their relationship is known as metamors.”

Damian nodded slowly.

A spinning graphic of the triforce came up on the screen next. “This can really be any shape, but a triangle keeps it simple. Basically every member in this format is involved with every other member. This is what Dick will be in, if everything goes well. Think of it like… so A and B both like C. It’s not about A sharing B or B sharing A, not really, it’s about them both also getting C! It’s more cake. Though that’s an ace saying, but, um, it’s like getting an ice cream with two scoops, yeah?”

“Sure,” Damian mumbled, a lost sounding agreement.

“And this can be lots of shapes, like I said! This is how it would look with four people: triangles in a square. The more people you have, the more complicated the relationship, agreements, and managing emotions can get, but if people are a really good group with each other and are willing to talk, it can work out!”

Damian almost tentatively raised his hand.

“Yes?”

“How would… something like that even start?” Damian asked.

“Oh, well… like, I guess think of it like a hero team just with romance? Sometimes you know people deeply enough that you trust them with your life and identity and everything else. In cases like that, it might not be odd for things to… for things to, um,” Tim trailed off, blinking up at the interconnected square.

“Drake…?” Damian prompted.

Jason started giggling.

“I, what? Sorry!” Tim said with a shake of his head. He continued in a rush as he flicked through various relationship set up examples. “But something like that! So um, those are your basic types but things can be combined and changed and altered. The main thing is to respect that someone who is in a polyamorous relationship wants to be in one. And that if you enter one, that you aren’t afraid to talk things out, make boundaries that you need, and talk through any changing boundaries!”

Tim flicked quickly to his last side.

“Oh, and, um, queer platonic relationships is sorta like aroace stuff, people in it dedicate themselves to a partner or partners even if they have no romantic or sexual feelings. It’s basically a way to say that a person is that important to them just as a person!” Tim said as he fumbled for his phone. “Anyways! The PowerPoint has been emailed to you. Direct any questions to myself or Bruce and be polite to Dick, Wally, and their new guy, okay? Okay. Gotta run.”

“That was odd, was it not?” Tim heard Damian ask Jason.

“Yeah…” Jason was still staring at the screen on queer platonic relationships when Tim glanced back. “Actually, I have to go too, okay? Doesn’t have to be your jam for you to be polite, got it?”

“What on earth has gotten into them,” Damian mumbled.

-

Cassie crossed her arms as soon as Tim appeared on Mount Justice. “Okay, what’s the emergency?”

“It’s, okay, so Bruce made me give this presentation to Damian because Dick and Wally added a new person to their relationship and no one want’s Damian to be an asshole—”

“Like he normally is,” Cassie muttered.

“—and ruin things before it starts, you know?”

“Please tell me it wasn’t your normal style of PowerPoints?” Kon asked.

“Of course it was,” Tim said with a dismissive wave. “But I was giving it and—just it all made sense suddenly! We are all idiots.”

“Hey!” Bart chirped. “I mean, yeah, but hey!”

“No, I mean—” Tim let out a noise of frustration and grabbed the nearest teammate, which happened to be Bart, and kissed him.

Bart made an adorable little squeak and then practically went boneless and still in a way that Tim had never seen Bart go before.

“Oh,” Kon said off to the side, sounding oddly flat. “That’s—congratulations you two.”

“Zeus, you are an idiot,” Cassie said.

Kon’s reply was muffled.

Tim pulled back, shoved the lax Bart at Cassie (who had just finished kissing Kon), and marched over to pull Kon into a quick, crushing kiss.

Kon blinked back. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh,” Tim said. “All of us. I want… I want all of you and for all of you to want all of you and for… and for us to be together—teammates and more in all the ways. Because I trust you all, and I never don’t want to have you.”

Tim looked from Kon, who still looked stunned, and over at Cassie who was cradling a boneless looking Bart and petting his hair. She rolled her eyes. “You’re all idiots.”

“Yeah,” Tim agreed breathlessly. “But you love us.”

“Yeah,” she agreed with a smile and a sigh. “yeah I do.”

[thatrandomsarahchick]

Hehehe

Imagine if he does all of this entirely as Danny the Human.

Then something happens that leads to people thinking he's been overshadowed by a ghost, so they trap him to try and 'free' him, only for him to walk out of the trap - to no surprise from the Bats - and have to explain that he's actually the retired Ghost hero, Phantom.

Suddenly, Bruce feels a chill down his back. He had contingencies for Danny the human that might have worked, but nothing that could cover this!

Tim and Jason let loose mad cackles - no one had listened to them when they tried to protest this plan - as they were already aware of his half ghost status.

Damian is practically vibrating in glee. He knows that ghost culture involves a lot of fighting, and is planning on asking Danny to equip him with gear so he can go and fight some ghosts.

Wonder Woman squints at Danny in his Phantom form. When he's in that form, her Godly blood is telling her that he is her Uncle in some way. It can't be true, though, because she's met all of the Kronides. He does look familiar, though, so maybe she's seen him in a museum somewhere? It does beg the question, though, of why he's playing human nanny in Gotham right now.

Superman ... is suddenly remembering stories of the Kryptonian Death God, Phantom, and how he gifted their people with "the Phantom Zone" after saving them during a terrible invasion. It's hard for him to put together the stories of the fearsome warrior with his memories of Danny accidentally pouring orange juice in his cereal, or the time he was reading against a wall and sneezed so hard he gave himself a concussion, or even that time that he was interviewing the family as Clark, and overheard Danny asking Alfred how to spell 'ear'. Sure, Danny looks identical to the images he's seen, but they can't be the same guy ... right?

I'm imagining that Clockwork agreed to help bring Bruce back to the correct time in exchange for Danny running a couple of Time Police missions for him.

Someone had messed with the timeline and now a very powerful civilisation might be wiped out before they had a chance to reach the stars. Danny needed to go and oversee them for a few key moments over the course of a century, a few millennia in the past, and while he was doing that Clockwork would extract Bruce and bring him to where he needed to be.

Having been declared legally dead and without a cent to his name, Danny arrives in Gotham desperate for any job. So when he gets hired by a rich couple to babysit their kid while they're away (which apparently is quite often) without them even doing a background check on him, he thinks he's hit the jackpot.

Until he finds out just how neglected this kid is. Danny knows from personal experience just how that can mess a person up so he decides to shower this kid with all the love and attention he could ever dream of. And maybe figure out a way to stop him from sneaking out at night.

[thewritingfairy]

Platonic Batfam where Bruce finds out he has a younger sibling that they didn't know about who grew up in an Orphanage who he only found out after they donated blood at a Wayne sponsored blood drive, except when they meet his younger sibling has the reddish brown hair of their mother and softer build. Like, how the different Batfam members would become Yandere toward them due to their similarities to Martha, and the mellow dynamic they have.

Feel free to make this as long or short as you want, this idea is now yours to run with or anyone else. ✨️

 𝜗𝜚 ࣪˖ ִ𐙚 A lost sister has returned home

trigger warnings: shouting, yandere themes, kidnapping, talk about violence, breaking of boundaries, unedited main m.list

Bruce has fond memories of his parents, their love that always inspired him. Love that made him wish he still had their warmth and their love for each other a blueprint he was determined to follow.

A love so strong that his father helped his mother through a still birth that had shaken her to her core. Yet here he is standing in front of an apartment door where his sister lives, a sister he thought he lost.

A sister that he's terrified to meet, yet he still knocks on the door. If he can fight the Joker almost monthly, sometimes weekly, he can confront his fear of your rejection.

But when he knocked and you opened he didn't expect your gaze to be so harsh. He didn't expect the anger you already held for him.

"Bruce Wayne, what are you doing here?" you had hissed. Clearly pissed that he even had the audacity to turn up at your door. "You have no business to show up at my door."

"But I do," he had said, his tone soft. Almost pleading. "you are my sister."

"And I want nothing to do with you," you had instantly told him. Your glare reminded him of the few times his (and your) mother glared at his father. "otherwise I would have contacted you myself."

With that you had thrown the door in his face. It was the first and last time you two had spoken, after that every approach he took towards you were ignored.

His children stepped in from that point, his youngest Damian confused by your rejection was the hardest to ignore. He would bring you art of your mother, of your family and of things you enjoyed without even saying a word. Just wordlessly shoving the art pieces in your hands on your grocery runs.

A conversation only struck when one of the older boys or girls were with him, you found it hard to ignore them. Your anger is with their father, not with them. So slowly, despite the boundaries that you had set, you had let them in. Allowing them to help you on your grocery runs, allowing them inside of your apartment as you pretend that their actions are fine.

That the fact they always know when to show isn't creepy, that they aren't trying to convince you to let Bruce Wayne in your life.

Your brother who wishes to learn about, your brother who wishes to love you.

Eventually it was Jason who asked you why you didn't want to let him in.

"He acts as if he's righteous," you whispered as you washed some rice. "as if he's changing gotham, but truly he's just making the city worse."

Jason hadn't asked what you meant, he was terrified of the answer. Terrified of hearing your reasoning. Yet, that conversation was the catalyst of your current situation.

Bruce had never touched your nursery until that day, he had upgraded the room to find the theme of your apartment (according to Tim and Stephanie, truly they did most of the choosing of furniture and more. Bruce just did the physical labour). He had gotten you a bed large enough for your age, but his children could not deny that the theme was still child-like, littered with little gifts your mother had bought for you for your birthday when she was still alive. Littered with the gifts Bruce got to continue his mother's tradition.

"You know she isn't going to come to the manor, right?" Dick had asked Bruce, concerned with how he was coping with your rejection. "Perhaps you should give her time, we'll probably wear her down. You won't need to do anything drastic-"

"This is the only way!" Damian had defended his father, glaring at his favourite brother and second father. "She doesn't know all Father does for Gotham! She doesn't know how to even defend herself!"

Oh, how you made him swallow those words.

The day Batman had come to taken you from your appartment you didn't go without a fight. No, you went kicking and screaming. You had almost gotten away, but Tim had to stand in the way.

So here you are now, in a room that feels too artificial with a big portrait of a woman and a man that looks like you. Of a woman that is meant to be your mother, yet you feel nothing as you stare at her and her husband.

You are unable to leave this room, trapped inside by your brother who brings you your meals. He sometimes even feeds you, barely batting an eye as you throw vases at him shout obscenities at him. Yet he still doesn't let you return home, but the worst part of it all is the children.

The girls pretending as if everything is alright when they force you to participate in girls night, as they act like you are a psuedo-mother.

The boys pretending as if everything is alright and aiding their father in his delusions.

You are stuck in this manor, limited to your room most of the time where you cannot expect privacy unless you are changing. And even then your brother walks in, he pretends as if you are his little sister that has yet to adult. That has yet to learn how to do the most basic things by herself, it's driving you insane truly.

It makes you want to kill them all.

I know I should be writing for Nobody's child, but listen my og story idea in you form has now officially hit the novellette stage in draft 1! I usually rewrite the first few parts like 6 times. I am actually writing well and enjoying myself with an original idea without feeling the need that everything has to be perfect right away! My creative joy is coming back now, truly.

[faramirsonofgondor]

Batfamily game night except the person who loses the most games has to do a therapy session. Almost every time the kids strategize so that Bruce will lose but somehow he never does, a fact that he is very silently smug about. The kids stop trying to hide the fact that they’re cheating so he’ll lose and just blatantly use any means they can think of. Bruce almost breaks his arm when, during his turn at Jenga, Jason trips him into the tower. Dick pretends to ignore Bruce’s grumbling after he walks away from Twister with a bloody nose because Dick kicked him “on accident”. No one is sure how but Tim vaporizes the monopoly board after Bruce gets another Boardwalk. Damian lightly stabs him during poker, to which they have to take a short break (Bruce wasn’t even winning - Cass was). Steph winces and rubs her arm after hitting Bruce in the stomach “by mistake” during Just Dance. Duke almost blinds him when they decide to play hide and seek. Eventually the kids start to get more vicious and turn on each other in their frustration. Almost every game ends with at least one drop of blood spilt, but they’re all determined to win and beat Bruce. In all honestly, none of them pay it any mind until the JL decides to a host a game night for everyone and all hell breaks loose.

[chaoticwriting]

Old Friend 2

Part 1

In the car

Vlad: So, young Daniel. I'm not really trying to pry but may I know how you know young Cassandra?

Danny: *Grunts* We met a long time ago. Way before I became Phantom. I was kidnapped when I was young by a group of cultists.

Vlad: What!? I never knew any of this.

Danny: Of course you don't. My family never dares to bring up the topic since they are afraid it will trigger my trauma or something.

Vlad:.......

Danny: And for the longest time, they are not wrong. Imagine, you are 5 years old, waiting for your parents who go out to hunt some ghosts when suddenly a group of men in fully black clothing cover your face with black clothing and knock you up. Next thing you know, you are standing in the middle of a group of children. Scared just as much as you while being surrounded by a group of assassins.

Danny releases a sigh as he remembers his past.

Danny: It is not easy to survive. They train you like you are a robot. If you don't complete your task, they will either punish you or ignore any of your needs. Sometimes both. For them, kids who fail to complete tasks are as worthless as a grain of sand.

Danny: I stayed there for a full 4 years. Training, fighting and killing. I do whatever it takes to survive. Just to see mom, dad and Jazz again. It was there I met her. She's just like me although her circumstances are different.

Danny: A kid who is raised unwillingly as an assassin. We used to escape our observes eyes and meet up in a forest. For the longest time, it was like that. Sometimes we talk about escaping. But most of the time we just talk, or show each other things that we found interesting while we were out on a mission.

Heavy silence falls in the car as Danny stops talking.

Danny: However, things changed one night. I waited and waited in the forest. But she never came. When I returned back to the base, I heard a commotion. "The Perfect Weapon has escaped". I don't know what to feel then. It felt like I was betrayed and yet I felt relieved and happy to know that she was no longer there.

As Danny stops speaking, they arrive at the hotel Vlad booked. Vlad is not good at comforting people but he knows from Jazz that sometimes giving people time alone is a good way to comfort them.

They eat dinner from the room service and decide to go to bed early tonight. As Danny lays on his bed, visions of the past return to him. The bitter and the sweet. Looking at the clock that is past midnight, Danny gets out of bed and takes out a long coat. If he can't sleep, might as well get rid of this excess energy.

---Wayne Manor---

Bruce silently nods as he hears his daughter's story. Honestly, it frustrates him that such a thing could happen and yet he cannot do anything about it. Sometimes, he wonders if he should really just kill all his rogues.

No. He shouldn't think like that. Returning his focus to his daughter, Bruce calmly rubs her head.

Bruce: It's fine. I'm sure you could talk it out with him. From what I see, he is not fully hostile to you. I'm sure he would understand if you explain it to him.

Cass: Hmmm.

Bruce: Do you still want to go on patrol tonight? I think Tim is free to fill in your spot if you don't feel like it.

Cass: No. I'm okay and will be. Just need to process my thoughts.

Bruce: Alright sweetheart.

Suddenly, his phone starts ringing.

Oracle: Hey, Bruce.

Bruce: Yeah?

Oracle: You might want to check in soon. There have been reported shootings at a factory near Scarecrow's territory.

Bruce: Alright. Inform the others to get ready.

As the call is cut off, Cass quickly goes down to the Batcave. She will think about how to contact Danny later. First, there is a shooting to quell.

[kimberly-spirits13]

Batboys Dating Cat-like Reader HC (Request)

Warnings: mild language

Note: not really sticking to a request list or anything but I thought this would be a good one- Still on the Damian and Jason trains so expect some more of stuff for them in the future I think. Also, y'all the recent tumblr drama kept me up so late last night, I was fully enthralled by the circus that was last night 💀

Dick Grayson:

He definitely isn't the chill laid back type- Dick is the bubbliest person you could know and it translates onto the field

The two of you have known each other since he was Robin so he's familar with all of your facets

He jokes that you're two different people when it comes to personal life and fighting

You're total opposites in the regards that he likes to go full throttle, brights colors kind of personality, and you're fine laying back and reading a good book for the entire day

Dick appreciates that you teach him to settle for a moment before jumping around to something new

When the two of you first fought together, he was shocked to see you be almost as serious as Bruce

Had to do a double take

You were swift and calculated, not taking a moment to relax and stay in place

You scolded him for paying attention to you rather than the fight at hand and he snapped out of it but couldn't stop thinking about it

When he found out about your ability to transform into a cat, he was thrownnnn

he thought he was confused seeing you fight? now he's just bamboozled

It isn't often that you use these abilities, but it comes in handy for collecting information on people

There's nothing inherently suspicious about a stray cat roaming around shady allywaya or docks in Gotham City so no one is suspicous towards the feline after Nightwing comes crashing in unexpectedly

He's a total tease about it too- has probably pointed a lazer at you to see if you'd react before having his dreams smashed by your intense eye roll and the book that smacked across his forehead

Jason Todd:

Probably the type to seek out a laid back person as a partner

He wants someone to sit around with so that he can read Jane Austen in comfortable silence

Favorite spot is infront of the fireplace in the library of Wayne Manor

always joked that you were drawn to the heat like a cat in the sun

He thought he was kidding until the first time during patrol that you shrank down into a little grey and white cat before jumping off the ledge of whatever you were on to get a better idea of what two goons were talking about

When you came back up and reverted to regular form and told him that Penguin was planning a jewelry heist, was dead still trying to process

"what the fuck Y/N?" his brain is going at 100mph going "huh, how what, why, when, HUH?"

"I was just kidding about you being like a cat..."

You grin at him and he accepts that he's seen weirder and moves on

When it comes to fighting, he likes that you're not playing around about anything

There are times where he's worried that you could hurt yourself in the intensity of the entire affair, but you sooth his worries by promising that you wouldn't do anything stupid if there wasn't a good reason for it

If he's feeling funny one day, he will totally wave a string of yarn in front of you with the most devious look plastered on his face

"Really, Jason?"

"What?? I'm just checking!"

he likes that he often finds you curled up on the couch doing something engulfed in his clothes

like, they're comfortable, what are you gonna do?

Jason loves that you're able to get him to sit back and take a breath when he's worked up instead of letting him think that the world is going to come down on him

Sometimes he just needs a bit of a reality check

Tim Drake:

Loves, LOVES that you're fine just sitting with him while he works on cases

You don't nag him about things and are content keeping him company without pushing him to do things that he either doesn't want to do or can't do

You're often metaphorically talking him off the ledge and making him see things through a more realistic perspective instead of the end all be all that he can wrap his mind into sometimes

Thought that this would all translate into sparring until he's pinned on the mat with no way to escape

Not only is he sore and tired after the first sparring match that he has with you, he's confused

like- what?

consider him more confused when you offer to stalk out a few goons he was tailing by shifting into an inconspicuous cat

"you can do that?"

"yea Tim. This isn't new love"

well then..

He often asks that you do this for the sake of gathering information, but he secretly feels guilty because he's worried that you could get hurt somehow

He'd definitely notice if a cat was stalking around and then all of his plans were foiled everytime

You assure him that it's not hard to mimic an actual cat and that the goons are often too stupid to notice anything

Besides, it's not like you don't blend in with the rest of Gotham's stray cat population

Tim finds peace in the fact that he doesn't have to worry about you getting hurt in the field due to inexperience or lack of effort

He's more worried for the run of the mill underpaid goons who just got swept up in the whirlstorm of your patrol

Damian Wayne:

I feel like it would take him a second to get used to the cat thing

sure he knows Beast Boy, and that's not weird to him anymore, but at first it was a bit torturous considering that he wasn't a massive fan of his demeanor but still really likes animals

the difference here is that Damian vibes super well with your demeanor

He doesn't worry about you running around and acting a fool

Loves that you're basically always in his company, even if it's in silence

He likes to sit and either read or draw/paint while you're doing your own thing

it's a peaceful presense that he knows won't get ripped away by some instability or shift in the world

He didn't realize that this calmness didn't translate into fighting until you're sparring for the first time

he offers to teach you and improve your skill so you play along

"Try to attack me." He said with a tone of confidence

There's not a moment for him to think before you've laid him out of the mat and knocked the air out of his lungs

"How was that?" You asked with a smirk in your voice

"that was... unexpected."

That moment ends the era of him worrying so much about you on the field

He doesn't tense up as much when you suggest that you could collect information by stalking the suspects as a cat

He knows that you can certainly handle yourself without his assistance

Wouldn't mind if you curled up in his lap as a cat, but he would never voice that outloud

at least not for a LONGGG time

you have caught him intensely observing your interactions with Alfred the cat

He wants to know if Alfred will have either some sort of reaction to you, or like you more than the average person

Don't tell him that you know about these "little observations" or he'll sink into himself and die out of embarrassment

[yandere-daydreams]

Weirdly interested in the dynamics of the batfam having something akin to a queue for the reader. Like do they fight for the first spot? Do some of them collude and make deals to include the other if they help them get first??

hmmmm i do believe a lot of their exact conflicts are based on context + the reader's personal vibes, but completely based on pecking order and what would go down if they straight-up sat down and talked about it, i do have a loose line up. assume anyone not included is simply not enough of a freak to participate in the pseudo-inscest train and go from there.

tw - non/con, kidnapping, bad vibes all around.

dick - eldest daughter vibes, falls back on seniority when asked why he should get to take your hypothetical virginity. if that fails, he's ditching the queue altogether and re-kidnapping you away from the rest of his family until he's gotten what's his.

steph + cass tag-team - it's a combination of steph being very insistent on going as early as possible and cass thinking this would be a lot more fun with her best totally platonic gal pal there too :) steph's happy to take the in-law clause and cass doesn't mind a little instruction from someone with more experience, when the time comes.

tim - purposefully delays his turn because he thinks your cute when you're too exhausted to resist. definitely the most gentle but also the most likely to literally be drooling by the time you get to him so uh. it balances out.

jason - claims he's too good for this but breaks in through a window after tim's turn. he's simultaneously devastated he didn't get to you before dick and furious with himself for participating at all, and all that's going to be taken out on you.

bruce - last but not least. he claims it's for your safety, so he can make sure you're cleaned up and allowed to rest when it's all over, but his concern for your safety isn't enough to stop him from fucking you in the bath as he asks you if anyone kissed too roughly, if anyone was too mean to you, how many times you cried, etc. for all his moralizing and stone-faced resignation, you think he might be the most affectionate when he knows he's sharing you with the people he loves most.

[l0s3rd0wnt0wn]

"BED OF CHAINS"

Batfam x black vampire!reader

"Where am I!?" A joker goon yells, his clown makeup smearing from how much he was sweating. The man was terrified, as if he had just been hit with fear toxin. He was held upside down, bound together with rope. He thrashed around, swinging back and forth, trying to escape, but he was only giving himself rope burn. "What do you want from me?" he wailed. Then Tim yawned, "Breakfast," pressing a button that let the man descend into the darkness of the manor’s basement. All that could be heard in that cold, dark room were the sounds of screams and cries of agony and pain. Tim heard a rip, then a splash, and the screaming was done. Tim pressed the button again; the goon's neck was ripped completely in half, vocal cords torn out, a head hanging on a thread. "Someone was hungry," he muttered, taking a swig of his energy drink.

You, the bats, have a tiny little secret. Living in your basement, under layers of dirt, there's a cell made of pure silver and a dark red coffin wrapped in silver chains. Each night, you shake a rattle in the coffin, punching it. "I know you're hungry, my dear." Bruce walks down the heavy stairs. You growl, kicking at your coffin. "Dinner is coming," he said softly, watching you from an indestructible glass window. He presses a button, and a goon is pushed into your cell. He's terrified. Then your coffin door slams open, and big, bright red eyes appear from the darkness. "Don't make a mess this time, sweetie." And you made a mess; blood and guts splattered on the window. Bruce wasn't phased; he'll get Alfred to clean it up.

"Uh, Dick, who's that?" Wally questioned, seeing a dark figure hanging upside down in the corner of the house, big red eyes staring right at him. "Oh, that's just the baby bat. She gets nervous around strangers."

"Little miss, you messed up your nightgown again; it's covered in blood," he fusses, touching the fluffy fabric that dripped crimson. All you can do was fiddle with your dress and pout. "Hungry?" "I see, and who was your victim tonight?" You'd look away, cheeks puffing up. "Alfie, where's the first-aid kit?" Jason grumbles, covering his bleeding neck with his palm.

[electricgg]

From what I read I feel like Wayne reader wouldn't swear. But maximoff reader vibe is like I would curse if the situation is dire.

What would happen if she walked in a room which is having every member of the batfam. And she is so tired of their bs. Rightfully so.

And she curses. Batfam never heard her curse what could be their reaction.

Yes, Wayne wouldn’t swear. She always made the effort to avoid curse words in her matter of speech.

Maximoff tho… let’s say Uncle Pietro’s bad influence stuck even after the hex. She pretty much curses in her head and out loud without a filter (which gains a lot of warnings from Logan jsjsjsjjs)

In that scenario, she probably walked into the kitchen or the living room and came face to face with the Batfam and cursed (something among the line of ��fuck this shit, I’m going back to bed’), everyone would have different reactions.

Bruce would be caught off guard. She has been snappy and upfront, he is letting pass (for now, even if he has to bite back his tongue.) but cursing? Yeah he is probably thinking Jason is passing time with her behind his back and teaching her that (she is a high schooler with free will?? She could have picked up from anywhere.) He also tries to get her attention and correct her behavior but she is flashing him a middle finger while stomping down the hall.

Dick is having a meltdown. WHO DARED TO TEACH HER THAT??? He is definitely pinning the blame on her classmates (bc he refuses to acknowledge Bobby and Warren as her friends). Ever since she has been hanging around those boys, she has behaving so unkindly and unladylike. This is why she needs to move to homeschooling, too many unreliable people trying to corrupt his little baby sister.

Jason is somewhat proud and somewhat puzzled. Sure, he knows she has been acting somewhat hostile by Dick’s sobbing calls at 2am and he gets it! But, it’s still odd to see her (someone who always made the effort to look put together and proper) cursing so openly. He will probably need to look into her new behavior deeper (get his stalker ass rn-)

Cass is very much terrified. She still looks over her shoulder every five seconds since the piano room event. She is not taking well her sister new change, and the cursing is just doing it worse. Is she possessed? It’s this some doppelgänger situation? She is probably contacting Constantine after that-

Tim dissecting every word, posture and look. He thinks is all part of her well thought plan (bro what-) to catch him off guard. Do something that she would never actually do so she gets a reaction out of him. He thinks he should sit her down and talk, reassure her that she doesn’t need to do that because he has always known how clever she is and there’s no need to act like a rabid cat anymore (somebody knock his ass out pls-)

Damian is also analyzing the situation while also panicking like Cass. Is it truly an act to get their attention (his own specifically)? Is she under some mind control spell? Is that even HER?! Yeah, Constantine is a horrible choice but he’s the only one that knows about possessing. Either way, Damian thinks it’s the outside influence of someone or something

[witherby]

Yoooo, reading Hideaway with Mouse and Conner made me wanna know how it would go if someone actually *did* manage to walk in on them being intimate.

Imagine the chaos, the violence, and the sobs from Dick as he realizes just how mature Mouse has actually become.

Or even worse - what if actual pregnancy scare. They'll probably tell Hal first, cause he won't immediately try and kill Kon, or Jason, who just runs off to buy some tests because if Mouse was caught buying them, all hell would break loose, but Jason? Jason could have just had a one night stand and wanted to be sure

I can tell you what would happen!

What if you had gotten caught in the act?

Bruce: expressionless face, closes the door and walks away immediately, cries alone in his bedroom because his youngest kid is growing up so fucking fast, finds Conner after the deed is done and they've had time to get themselves together and asks him to please never fuck in this house again. It's taking all his strength not to put the manor in Red Sun Mode and beat his ass.

Hal: gasps, blurts an apology for barging into Mouse's room like that, leaves, gives them both a little goody bag with condoms and candies afterwards and emphasizes the importance of locking doors, and "hey did you know that putting a sock on your doorknob —"

Dick: screams, sobs, gags, clings to Mouse afterwards and tells them to stop doing grown-up shit, they're just a baby (they're in their 20s). Glares at Conner and tells him to stop committing sin with his little itty bitty baby sibling (Mouse is only a head shorter than Dick).

Jason: startles, realizes he should've knocked first, leaves, minds his business.

Tim: audibly blurts "EW, WHAT?" and slams the door. Avoids Mouse and Conner like the plague for at least two weeks while he desperately tries to get the image of what he saw out of his brain. Every time he sees them both his face goes >:[ automatically.

Damian: shouts in shock and disgust, immediately draws a knife out of seemingly nowhere to attack Conner so you have to slip into the shadows with him, rants and scolds your shadow forms on the floor for several long minutes until someone else drags him out of the room, apologizes because Jason forces him to.

Alfred: tuts in disappointment, closes the door, and pointedly laments the good old days when people got married before going for a romp in the sheets at dinner.

What if there's a pregnancy scare?

Bruce: outwardly he is keeping a calm and level head, letting Mouse know they have options about keeping it or not, and insists he will support them no matter what. Inwardly he's screaming GRANDBABY? GRANDBABY?? I WILL BE A GRANDPA? GRANDPA TIME? BABY? MY BABY HAVING BABY? BABY!! GRANDBABY!!! GRANDBABYGRANDBABYGRANDBABYGR

Hal: outwardly supportive of any decision taken, just like Bruce. Inwardly going g-grandbaby???? I will be grandma??? I'm gonna fucking CRY, GRANDBABYGRANDBABYGRANDBABY

Dick: screaming, crying, throwing up, so emotional at the prospect of being an uncle, begging Mouse to let him babysit when the fuckin pregnancy test isn't even done running yet

Jason: absolutely when and bought the tests for Mouse. Bought two of a few different brands just to be sure. Insists whatever they wanna do is perfectly fine and valid, even Conner, but after some wheedling he does admit having another baby running around would be kinda fun again

Tim: loudly declares "EW" but then immediately follows it up with "I get to babysit before Dick. It'll be so funny. Please let me babysit first."

Damian: takes some deep breaths, does not bring his knife out again, brings home pregnancy tests from the hospital, and promises he will either give Mouse the best prenatal care on the planet or find them the best hospital for a quick and painless abortion, then tells Conner flat-out that he won't be allowed to be a deadbeat or he'll just be dead.

Alfred: great grandpa? Great-grandbaby??? GREATGRANDBABYGREATGRANDBABYGREATGRANDBABYGREATGRANDB

[batsandbirdbrains]

And another one where Dick gets trapped in a fantasy in his own mind, but this time the other batboys have to go in and snap him out of it.

There was some weird magician in Gotham and Nightwing saw him about to hit one of the others with a spell, so he pulls his brother out of the way. But he’s not quite quick enough, and he gets hit instead. And yadda yadda big fight happens and now the batboys have Dick in the med bay in the batcave, because he’s totally out cold and they’ve called in Zatanna to help figure out what’s wrong.

And one big magical explanation later about how he’s stuck in an ideal fantasy world his own mind created, the other three boys are now inside Dick’s fantasy world, and it’s so disorienting. It’s colorful and the smells are vivid - sweet candy and musky hay and the smell of dirt and grass and chalk - and they’re staring at a giant fair ground with a big red and white circus tent, red and white flags flapping in a light breeze.

They’re expecting to find their brother. They’re looking for their brother - for the twenty-something Dick Grayson. An adult.

Instead, they see a blur of a boy they’ve only seen in pictures and videos, because he’s darting by them quickly to duck inside the circus tent. They follow after him, trying to call his name, trying to get him to slow down.

“Mama!” the little voice calls. “Pa! Towners in the tent!”

A woman they’ve seen in faded photographs drops from a ladder and is quick to pick the boy up, and a man starts walking towards them. He’s large, muscular, but he looks friendly. He has a smile on his face, and he glances briefly to where the woman is speaking soft French to the boy, before turning back to the three brothers.

“The show doesn’t start for another few hours,” the man says kindly. “You’ll have to explore the fairgrounds until then. We have plenty of games to play to pass the time.”

“I like the ring toss!” the little boy calls, a grin on his face. The woman smiles and pokes at his belly, making him laugh.

“My little Robin,” she says sweetly, still smiling at him, smoothing back his wild hair, “why don’t you show them where the games are?”

And it makes Tim and Jason feel like they’ve been dumped in ice. Because they thought Robin was a name Bruce came up with, they thought it only came about when Dick joined Batman. Damian is the only one who isn’t surprised, he’s the only one who ever asked Dick where the name came from. And Dick has often called Damian his little Robin in the same soft tone that the memory of his mother just used.

“But I need to practice, Mama!”

“You can practice after you show them the ring toss,” she insists, setting him down. Dick pouts at her, grasping at her costume, silently begging to be picked back up. She just continues smiling and laughing and pushes him gently towards the other boys.

“I’d like to see the ring toss,” Damian says, staring at this little version of his big brother, of his Batman. “Could you show me?”

Dick stares at him for a moment, but when Damian holds out his hand, he eventually steps forward and takes it, dragging Damian out of the tent.

“Alright,” Dick says, pulling Damian along. “Gustav always lets me play the ring toss, he might even give you an extra ring since you’re with me!”

“Perhaps you can show me the best technique.”

“Sure!”

Tim and Jason are whispering together, trying to figure out what to do, how to snap Dick out of this fantasy, but Damian turns and glares at them. They clearly know nothing about Grayson. Damian will be the one to save him.

They’re in a row of carnival game booths, and Dick is standing on his toes, head bobbing above the edge as he speaks in German to the man running the ring toss booth. Then he grins at Damian, handing him six rings of various sizes.

“Usually you only get five!” Dick tells him. “Told you he’d give you extra!”

“Would you like to toss three of them?” Damian asks, and he hauls Dick to sit on top of the edge of the booth so he can see the pins.

“You have to hold them like this,” Dick tells him, showing jin the perfect technique. It’s similar to how he throws his Wingdings.

They’re on their second set of rings when Damian tells him, “You know, you’ve shown me this before.”

Dick turns and tilts his head. He’s sitting on his knees, and he slumps a bit.

“I’ve never seen you before,” he says softly. “I’ve never met you.”

“But you have,” Damian says gently. “You showed me how to throw birdarangs. Do you remember?”

“I don’t know what a birdarang is,” Dick insists, shaking his head. But his voice is shaking, too.

“I know it’s difficult to think about,” Damian says. “I know it makes you sad. But this isn’t real, Richard.”

“Yes it is,” Dick says, but he sounds very unsure of himself. “It’s the circus. I live here, with my family. We’re acrobats.”

“You used to live here,” Damian tells him, and he’s standing in front of Dick now, holding his arms gently. “But this was a long time ago. You’re not supposed to be this young.”

“Yes I am,” he says. “I’m seven. I live at the circus with my family and I’m seven. We’re performing in Copenhagen next week. We’re only here for another couple days.”

Damian turns to Jason and Tim, and they all are having the same thought. He’s seven in his fantasy because he lost all of this when he was eight. He can’t be any older than seven, because then this all crumbles away.

“Do you know where here is?” Jason asks.

Dick looks around. Everything the eye can see is circus-related. There’s no other buildings. No roads. No train tracks. Just a big empty field.

“It doesn’t matter,” Dick says, voice shaking. “I need to go back to the tent now.”

He tries to get away, tries to go right past them, but Tim holds onto his shoulder.

“Please, Dick,” Tim begs. “Can you try to remember us?”

“I’ve never met you,” he cries, sucking in a shaking breath. “We’ve never met! I have to go find Mama and Pa.”

“Dick, please.”

“Let go of me, Timmy!”

Dick freezes, because the boys never said their names. He stares at the three boys, his lip wobbling, his chest heaving.

“I want Mama and Pa,” he cries.

“I know,” Damian says, and he kneels down in front of Dick after pushing Tim aside. “I know you miss them. But you have us, and if you got stuck in here, in this fantasy, we would miss you.”

“I want to see them, I want to see them,” Dick begs, but he’s fallen against Damian’s chest, holding on tightly to his shirt.

“Do you think you could leave if you saw them again?” Damian asks, and Tim and Jason are baffled at how gentle he’s being.

“No,” Dick sobs. He hides his face in Damian’s shoulder, and the world around them starts crumbling. The colors start to fade, the sky starts chipping away into black. The smells are fading, the music is shorting out, the chatter of the other circus goers turns to whispers until it’s quiet, the only sound left being Dick’s cries.

Everything has withered away until they’re standing in the middle of nothing. There’s a faint circus tent in the background, and lights are flickering from it, and they can hear a woman’s voice calling Robin? Where are you, my little Robin? and it makes Dick shudder.

He pulls back and looks Damian in the eye, asking in a miserable, terrified whisper, “She’s not real, is she?”

Damian takes a breath before answering, “No. I’m sorry.”

They hear Dick let out a miserable sob before they’re all pulled away suddenly, and they’re back at the batcave, and Dick is gasping from his place on the bed.

He’s depressed for weeks following the incident. No one blames him.

[scho17]

Wait, hold on, I'll explode. Please continue. This is something I didn't know I needed.

Bonus points if its a misunderstanding, and each time they try to deny it, they're interrupted, or it gets misinterpreted and perpetuates the misunderstanding even more. They get into goofy romcom level shit like yk that scene in Merlin (TV 2008) where Merlin and Arthur are sneaking around, and they get caught by a guard and Merlin makes some bs excuse saying he's reading Arthur poetry? Yeah, like that.

To Alfred, it's amusing to see Bruce (and company) get bent out of shape about his having a love life. If maybe a little bit offensive bc listen, u can't tell me old man ain't got game. That mustache has SEEN some shit.

Lancer and Alfred do end up tgthr after a bit of dancing around eachother and its not in some loud showy way but its evident in letters and gifts that are only for one anothers eyes (which honestly doesn't matter bc their audience are bats and that might as well be them spelling it out in the clouds).

I'll die on the ship of both of them being romantics please and thank you.

Oh my God, wait , imagine Alfred going to collect the mail and Bruce raising an eyebrow bc there's a parcel that came in, and well, he knows he isn't expecting anything. He eyes Alfred and his usually stoic but snarky butler has a small smile and in that moment he knows who it's from.

Guys, do you think Lancer and Alfred trade book recommendations,,,,

Jason who eventually catches wind and gets fucking whip lash bc WHAT. Like he's supportive but guys please cmon thats his grandpa

Tim groggily walking into the kitchen and witnessing Alfred willingly letting someone else (Lancer) into the kitchen and teaching them how to make pastries.

Batfam finding out on some random ass tuesday that Alfred gets bitches:

said bitches is some midwestern highschool english teacher but thats not important rn theyre too busy being scandalized someone run a bg check on this guy RIGHT NOW.

Bonding Over Hero Caretaking

(This is a little funny idea I had.) Mr. Lancer and Alfred are apart of an anonymous group that vents to each other about the hero's they keep an eye on so they don't end themselves by accident via something like not eating. Alfred finds what Lancer says concerning seeing as he hasn't heard B or the others comment on a hero described as Lancer has said. He talks to Barb about it but her AND Tim can't find out who Lancer is or where he is. Talks happen, Alfred starts talking to Lancer in private msgs at first as a way to get info but then he genuinely likes the talks. He decides that even after they find the unknown hero he's going to stay in contact with Lancer. Lancer just likes having a friend he can rant to about Danny without putting the teen in danger. Once they do find Amity they shut down the AECA and the GIW, they also offer Phantom a place in the YJ till he's old enough to join the JL. Throughout this Lancer and Alfred have kept in touch and Lancer even took trips to visit Alfred at times. One day, while out and about, Steph stumbles upon Alfred while he was making a Grocery run at a Cafe with Lancer. She stops by to say hi, only to be told by Alfred that while its lovely to see her, he's on a date. He kept the others out of her dates and he'd appreciate privacy for his, she leaves and immediately gossips with Cass since she wont tell anyone else till Alfred's date is over. Lancer x Alfred

[timcassie]

I need early/pre-robin batman days bruce to interact with current age tim. imagine ur literally batman and you work alone and now ur being bossed around by the most neurotic prey animal of a kid you’ve ever met and you’re so sure if you say no once he’s going to throw either you or himself off a building.

[demonic0angel]

Dani isn't allowed to watch Damian and Jon unsupervised anymore, which she thinks is bullshit! Just because she's "a bad influence", and "doesn't believe in the rule of law", or because last time they "burned down a police station"!

"It's not that bad!" Dani protested.

"Dani," Jazz sighed in exasperation. "You burned down a police station!"

"You don't even actually care that I committed arson! You just care that I got caught and did it with Damian and Jon!"

"Exactly," Jazz said. "You got caught. If you're going to endanger your partners' little brothers, you should've had the decency to go unnoticed!"

Dani grumbled something under her breath. "I can totally take care of Jon and Dami on my own."

Jazz rolled her eyes. "Well, once you stop getting caught in the middle of starting a crime, then perhaps Bruce and Clark can be convinced to let you babysit on your own. But until then, we'll have to let Barbara watch over you."

Dani groaned loudly.

"It's not fair! Danny gets to babysit them on his own!"

"Because the worst he's done is bring them to the Watchtower to look at the stars! The worst you've done is accidentally stumble into the middle of a meeting inside of the police station two minutes before you lit the matches!"

"They're preteens! A little bit of arson is good for them! I was making bacon!"

"Tell that to Bruce," Jazz said firmly.

Dani pouted again. Then she mumbled, "Tim and Kon are on my side."

"Dani, don't even start! You know that Tim and Kon indulge you and—"

And on and on she went, as Dani sunk deeper into a sulk.

The next time she'd try and do a good deed, she'd make sure to hold on tightly to Damian and Jon so they'd all be invisible.

[tr1nd2de]

Batson and the Bat-family

At a rare (evening) Wayne family dinner, where practically all members are present and relatively calm.

Sounds of running footsteps are heard, and the door to the lunch room opens.

A boy who appears to be about 13 years old, typical Wayne adoption pattern, black hair, blue eyes and white skin.

Billy: Bruce!?, are you okay? Did something happen!?.

Bruce: Billy? I ask you... why are you here?

Dick: Do we have someone new in the family?... I didn't know that.

The Batfamily members look between the new kid and Bruce, their expressions both indebted and surprised.

Billy: Bruce, your communicator is sending me a distress alert... HALF AN HOUR AGO!!. Do you have any idea how desperate I was when I saw this!?

Says Thomas responding to Dick:.

Thomas: I don't know... But if we have another lightning member then maybe Alfredo will ground Bruce.

Bruce puts his hand in his pocket seeing the communicator. And the boys and girls look at each other in silent communication trying to figure out if anyone knows the supposed new member.

Bruce: Of course it's damaged from the last mission, I'm sorry for the scare but... you don't seem to have announced your arrival as dramatically as usual. Did something happen?

Billy: It's me, I've been here in Gotham for a while... Taking a look at the Falcones

All: The Falcones!?

Damien: What were you investigating about the Falcones?, and who are you!?

Billy: Yes, the Falcones. Billy walks over to Bruce around the long table, and takes a folder out of his bag and hands it to Bruce. I don't know why yet, but they are reaffirming their good relationship with the mafia families outside of Gotham. The Batfamily members are on alert, Tim even pulled out his lepto to check the Falcons' activities with Barbara. I've heard that there was a fraternization between the Fawcett and Gotham mobsters, I thought I'd get some clues before telling you but... the distress alert made me abandon the espionage.

Damien: He ignored me!?

Jason: Are you going to cry, brat?

Damien: Don't even try Todd, I'm wondering what we're going to do about Dad's out-of-control tendencies about adoption.

As Bruce reads the folder, Alfred arrives carrying a tray.

Alfred: Master Billy, it's good to see you again. You're here on business I presume. Billy, giving one of his megawatt smiles, gives the old butler a quick hug. When you come back, I hope you stay because as a reward for the others, I will make cookies and I hope you will be here with us tonight. Says Alfred, as he leaves with a small smile on his face.

Billy: Sure Mr. Alfred, I'd love to spend some time with you if possible. Turning his gaze to Bruce with a serious expression. So, do you esse want to do something now or not?

Bruce: I think the best course of action is to be taken immediately, we don't know what they're up to so we need to act quickly.

Billy, puffing out his chest, looks at Bruce with a smile on his face:. Okay, I'll go as Batman!.

Bruce raising an eyebrow:. No

Billy ignoring Bruce's denial: No discussion Robin, to the Batcave!

After Bruce and Billy leave the room, the boys and girls look at each other trying to understand what just happened.

Dick: We should make Bruce wear a Robin costume.

Jason: What a hell of a sight... but I'd pay to see him in scaly green trunks.

Tim: By the way, I didn't find any record of the new member being adopted... could it be a biological child?

Damien: a biological brother?... and apparently living in Batman's post too. A worthy opponent, our battle will be more than legendary!

Cassandra: Cute.

The End.

I don't know if it was good... But that's it. I had this idea a while ago but didn't expand on it, so I hope it was interesting to read.

And I hope it's not that confusing, sorry if anything.

[xo-violent]

MR. [L/N]

note: bruce is a party pooper.

—

damian entered a penthouse with confused laced upon his face, this wasn’t one of his father’s. he carefully walked over towards a table filled with photo frames of… a dog and a boy?

now he definitely knew that this wasn’t one of his siblings penthouses either.

he cursed under his breath, “damn grayson, giving the wrong address.” but he couldn’t leave the place now, not while he’s still injured and bleeding out. whoever owned this place would be in for a jump scare, seeing robin bleeding out all over their pristine marble white tiles.

“oh my.”

damian jumped up in shock, turning around to face the voice. “what?” he stared dumbfounded, not seeing anyone other than the same dog from the photos. “who’s there?” he demanded.

—

“hey, don’t you think damian has been sneaking out lately?” tim asked, doing something on the computer.

he took one glance towards jason and dick, just to see if they were paying attention before continuing his research into the newer cases popping up.

jason froze for a moment and trailed off, “now that you’ve mentioned it… you’re absolutely right, replacement.” a mischievous grin appeared on dick’s face, “why don’t we follow him?”

—

a long silence filled the penthouse. “he’s literally a dog…” jason stated with tim whose eyes widened.

“little wing!”

letting out a deep sigh, you nodded. “no, that’s all right. although, i prefer the term ‘literate dog.’” tim spits out his drink, caught off guard. “AND IT CAN SPEAK!?”

“of course i can! i did receive a degree at harvard. vale-dog-torian, of course.” this made dick laugh, “so this is what damian has been hiding from us…”

“…a dog,” tim finished off dick’s sentence. you shook your head in disappointment, taking time to introduce yourself to these… intruders. “my name is mr. [l/n].”

“mr [l/n]! where are you?” your son walked into the room, mouth gaping open. “is that… red hood, red robin, and nightwing?!” he asked excitedly. “i have to find damian!”

“you have a child!?” all three shouted, causing damian to walk out of a room. “what are you three doing here?”

“are you living a double life?” was the first sentence to come out of one of the three boy’s mouths after seeing damian.

—

bruce meets mr [l/n]…

bruce stared blankly at his children, placing down his paperwork carefully after hearing their words, “your telling me… that you want to be adopted by a… dog?” he asked, confused and trying to confirm that it you were indeed a dog and not a human.

“mr [l/n]! he’s not just any dog, b. get with the program.”

“yes father. as grayson says, get with the program.” this caused bruce to sigh to himself. turning to face alfred, bruce raises an eyebrow only for alfred to nod along with the boys. “i’ve met mr [l/n], he seems to be doing well. he does have a son of his own, master bruce.”

“alright, let’s schedule a meeting with him then.”

—

“what do you do in your spare time?” bruce asked, still looking unamused as to why his children prefer a dog over him.

“in my spare time, i invented the fist bump.” you and dick made a fist bump, “planking.”

“tearaway pants,” and on que, you ripped off your pants revealing another pair. “auto tune,” you sang, holding a microphone that dropped from the ceiling.

“the backside ollie,” which both tim and you demonstrated for bruce who was surprised when skateboards randomly appeared. “and zumba,” music began to play in the background as you danced. however, bruce interrupts your dance moves short with a cough, “sure…”