#smack her babs

[haveihitanerve]

My favorite thing about the bats is that… they are gothamites. And sure they scare the shit out of people… but they are in Gotham. Superman is loved by his people, Flash is adored, people pray to Wonder Woman, Green Arrow is feared. But the Bats? The Bats are like all of Gotham's weird older brothers/sisters/parents. Superman and Green Lantern are visiting Batman in Gotham and all of a sudden he gets smacked in the face by a banana and they turn and find a group of teens skateboarding away and one kid calls over his shoulder ‘eat the fucking potassium you absolute brick.’ and Batman doesn't even do anything. Barry is chilling with Nightwing when a girl runs beneath the building they are sitting on and screams “Nice ass Night! But get it the fuck down here, my cats stuck in a tree.” And Nightwing does a flip off the building and just?? helps her?? Wonder Woman and Black Canary are passing through Crime Alley on their way to the Batcave and spot Red Hood standing in an alley, being lectured by a woman who is half his size and she ends the lecture by throwing two sandwiches at his face and walking away. Red Hood just takes his hood off and starts eating. Superboy is helping Red Robin defeat Scarecrow and while they’re hiding, waiting for him to walk into their trap, RR is casually conversing with a Gothamite about Hogwarts Houses, and when he says the Gothamite looks like a Gryfindor he pops his head out and screams “Yo scarecrow hes right fucking here!” J’onn is heading to the Manor to discuss League business with Bruce when he spots Robin(Damian) fighting Riddler all alone and is about to intervene when three teenagers show up and just fucking deck him instead. Damian doesn't thank them, just glowers, and one of the guys goes “you're welcome you fucking brat.” And the girl even smacks the back of his head and goes “manners.” Clark is sent to go find Tim and Steph and Damian and finds them at this girls birthday party, in full costume, eating cupcakes and drinking punch, jumping on the bouncy house and is like “errr, B-Batman needs you home.” And as one the entire birthday party group went “Fuck Batman.” Spoiler was spotted painting these guys nails, Black Bat was seen teaching calculus to a group of teenagers, Batgirl(Babs) was running after a group of kids screaming “Give me back my laptop you fucks!” Just- just the batfamily and Gothamites being annoying to each other and appreciative yet bitches. 

Bus driver: stop getting thrown at my fucking bus, i got places to be and my insurance only covers so many shatter windshields and person sized dents  Batman: I don't really control where I get thrown Bus Driver: well you better fucking start otherwise theres gonna be another fucking villain on these streets *drives away and almost runs him over* Superman: *gaping* yo-you're just gonna let him do that? Batman: *shrugs* Gotham insurance aint what its cracked up to be Superman: *staring dumbly*

[hoodielord]

Green eyes in the fear fog.

For half a second, Steph thought today would be a decent day. But no, not in Gotham.

Steph's current events professor, who was also the head of student affairs, had offered extra credit to help give college tours. Look, she had to take the extra credit she had to, even if it meant that she had to be a tour guide. It wasn't hard, just annoying.

The group was small, only five people, but two of them stuck out. A brother and sister. The brother was the definition of adoption bait blue eyes, black hair, vigilante tendencies withholding. The sister was at least as tall as Jason. She had orange hair just like Babs, you'd think they were related.

Anyways, Steph's new mission was to make sure the kid and Dick never met. The kid would not stop making puns. Some of them earned him a laugh but some earned him a smack from his sister.

"Aw, come on, Jazz, it was funny."

"You can do better." she shrugged.

" Sounds like a challenge." A wicked smirk appeared on his face.

" Danny, please don't."

"Challenge accepted."

Yep, I'm definitely keeping him away from Dick.

But something was off about them other than looking at the crime capital's university. They could probably be metahumans. Their eyes seemed to slightly glow blue. They carried themselves as they had already expected danger. I mean, it pays to be prepared, especially in Gotham, but they aren't from here.

If the siblings weren't already on a list B has they should be now. Jazz had been almost ecstatic when we were moving through the psychology department. Danny was practically bouncing off the walls when it was time to go through the engineering and physics departments. Definitely should keep an eye on them.

It was reaching the end of the tour in the cafeteria. Another weird thing about the siblings was their reaction to food. They seemed to have this sort of optimistic curiosity like they were happy to have food to eat, but at the same time, they were poking to make sure it wouldn't attack or something.

Talking with the siblings was interesting too. Danny was buzzing about the engineering department. He went into a great rant about a project that Wayne Enterprises was working on in the aerospace engineering division. Maybe she should keep him away from Tim, too.

The conversation died quickly when a shriek rang out from down the hall. Steph turned quickly to see green fear toxin fill the cafeteria. Swarms of people ran for the exits knocking each over. She quickly dug through her bag and pulled out her gas masks, one for her and her backup.

"Jazz? Jazz, where did you go?" Danny called. They must have gotten separated.

Damn, she needed another one for the siblings. She shoved her spare into Danny's hands.

" Put the mask on and head for the exit."

"But I need to find Jazz."

"I'll find her. Put the mask on and go." Steph yelled as she went further into the fog. Quickly, she sent an alert to Oracle. Signal is on patrol right now, but more bats might show up.

It was dense she could barely see in front of her. There was some noise up ahead. Someone was screaming. The yelling grew louder as she rounded the corner.

"Stop! Get away!"

It was Jazz. She was practically growling. Her fist slammed into the concrete wall, leaving a deep impact. She was clearly affected by the Fear gas. A meta affected with fear gas, not good.

"Stop! Don't hurt him. He's not a monster! He's my little brother!" Jazz had gone from fury to sadness as she practically begged for her hallucination to stop haunting her.

If it wasn’t the meta thing it was whatever she was hallucinating that caught Steph’s attention. Definitely on B's list now.

"Isn't it interesting what fear does to the mind?"

Steph saw Scarecrow emerge from the fog.

"I saw you in the psychology department. Your eyes lit up like a fire. But now they are clouded with fear."

A chill went up Steph's spine. She quickly checked her mask for leaks but didn't have any. Turning her attention back to Jazz and Scarecrow, she saw something. Green eyes shifted inside the fog. They looked like a predator hunting its prey. For a second, they look like Jason's.

From behind Scarecrow, the eyes stopped, and a figure emerged. A baseball bat slammed into Scarecrow's face, knocking him to the floor. The figure came into full view now. It was Danny his eyes were glowing green.

He knelt down to Scarecrow.

"You really don't have any brains. Do you Scarecrow? If you did, you wouldn't have hurt my sister." His voice was downright, frigid.

He turned and rushed over to Jazz who was still trying to convince her hallucinations to stop.

"Jazz, it's okay. Come on, I'm fine. It's okay." His voice was soft and gentle as he helped her up. Jazz mumbled a little as she stumbled down the hall.

Steph quickly caught up to the siblings slinging Jazz's arm over her shoulder.

"Sorry, I couldn't help earlier," Steph spoke quietly.

"It's fine. Not everybody can be a hero."

Steph wanted to laugh at the irony of that statement, but she just nodded.

"Sorry about the tour too."

"It wasn't all bad."

" Oh, the rouge attack and poisoning wasn’t bad?" Steph asked sarcastically.

" Our hometown is haunted and our community college is funded by my godfather. And he is a rich fruit loop.”

‘Ghosts?’

“You know Gotham University is funded by Wayne Enterprises right?”

“Annoying crazy fruit loop or weird himbo? Hmmm. Yeah, I’m going to have to go with the himbo on this one.”

Steph laughed at that one. Bruce is going to want to hear about this but she’ll keep him away from these siblings for a little while.

[vvampirelust]

ellie’s got a hunger for her dad’s latest squeeze

warnings: smut, ellie and reader are 18+, reader is older than ellie (ill let you decide), dom!ellie, sub!reader, oral (r!receiving), ellie’s a horndog, not proof read

Slender yet firm hands grasp your waist in the darkness of a winters morning. Creeping. Searching. Calluses seeking out sensitive skin beneath that goddam flimsy sleepshirt. “What’re you doing?” you gasp, wide eyes seeking out the person responsible for the waft of cool air drifting up your thighs, inching higher and higher ever so slightly. Your palms smack against the freezing countertop, shining white from the moonlight streaking through the kitchen window. 

Hot air blows beneath your earlobe. You shiver. “I’m sorry,” she mumbles,  a tinge of a whine in her tone, “Didn’t mean to scare ya,” she continues, beginning her assault of kisses to the exposed skin of your neck, “Just missed you,” she grunts with each peck, pressing into you from behind, “missed ya so much, babe.” 

“Ellie”

“Mm yeah, that’s my name babe. don’t wear it out,” she chuckles, finding time to joke in-between each wet kiss planted upon your sweet smelling throat. Ellie’s bony hips jut against your ass, the following groan indicating oh. She likes that. She does it again. And again. So, you repeat, “Ellie…Els.” She’s too busy pawing at you, voice rasping as she grunts, “Sound so sexy sayin’ my name,” she can hardly bear to tear her chapped lips away from your skin, “Nobody does it like you babe, ya hear me?” 

“Ellie!” What was supposed to be a whisper-shout ended up coming off as more of a cry. Your hands catching her sneaky fingers as they begin to seek out the exposed waistline of your panties. 

Ellie finally pauses, “Hm?” she hums, hugging you from behind. It’s a sweet hug, you’ll give her that. But no less distracting. 

“We can’t, els,” you sigh, leaning back into her warmth,  “I missed you too but oh, we shouldn’t.” 

Instead of backing off, you can feel Ellie’s mouth curving into a smirk. Like she gives a shit. Her mouth hovers by your ear, touching you. Every breath, every swallow, every flick of her tongue, you could feel. The sounds send tingles rolling down the back of your neck, onwards down your spine. And it doesn’t stop. Because Ellie does what she does best and opens that filthy mouth of hers. 

“Why do you do this to me, huh?” Ellie breathes deeply, a purr to her voice as she fists your thin sleepshirt within her tight grip, veins beneath her tattoo bulging, “Wear this shit around the house? S’like your beggin’ me to fuck you, babe,” ellie whines, drawing out that last syllable. 

She huffs, nosing at you, nipping at your ear, “Makes me wanna do bad things to you.” 

Your clit throbs in response, begging for attention. “Ellie,” you sound so desperate, Ellie has to bite down on her lip to hold back her own sound of want. 

“I’ll make her feel good,” she coos, “hm?” Your back arches as the tingling hits your lower back, a whimpered sound escaping your pursed lips. Els chases you, keeping the front of her body pressed to you as if she feared you would disappear if she let you go. “You want that? Yeah?”

Nimble fingers tease and twist your panties until they’re pooling around your ankles. You’re glad she lets them fall instead of stopping to mock you for how sodden they are. “I know what you need, babe. I’ll make you feel so fuckin’ good, mm, promise,” Ellie rambles almost incoherently, breath becoming heavier as she starts to kiss a pathway down the length of your back. “Just lemme have at it with you baby, gonna be so good, i promise.” 

And as if Ellie were daydreaming, you give in to her urges; head tipping back as her mouth glides over the plush of your behind. Ellie now kneels between your legs, sinking her teeth into your ass and moaning in unison with you. Your back arches at the feeling, presenting your cunt for Ellie to feast. 

“Atta girl,” Ellie growls, hands palming your ass, spreading you further apart, “Prettiest pussy baby, fuck-” 

She delves in. Shiny tongue weaving between webbed folds. She groans, going for a second taste, a longer lick. Ellie slurps at your cunt, the loud, lewd sound causing you to shiver, top half of your body lowering against the kitchen counter. The cold sends a jolt through your already perky nipples, and you squirm.      

“Fuck, sweeter than sugar, babe,” Ellie licks her lips, eyes memorising the sight of your wet cunt, puffy and pulsing for her - she could probably sketch a near accurate drawing in her notebook to keep with her at all times -  diving back in, her tongue and lips explore you. 

She sucks on your aching clit, flicking the talented tip of her tongue in intricate patterns that have your thighs quivering against her flushing cheeks.

 Indents of your teeth scatter across your hand and arm after having to resort to biting into yourself in order to stay quiet. It was the crack of dawn after all. So, you continue to release muffled moans against your skin, eyes squeezing shut in concentration- but fuck  Ellie knows what she’s doing with her tongue. 

“Mmhm, yeahh,” Ellie groans, face smushing into your cunt. Her ego swells with every jolt, jolt, jolt of your hips as her tongue catches the perfect spot in each swirl. 

It’s like magic. Every. Fucking. Time.              

She’s about to make you cum faster and harder than you ever had in your life. She can sense it in the pulsing of your clit, feel it in the tremble of your legs. God, she wants to beg. Please. Please. Please. 

Ellie feels when you slip over the edge before you do, and moans into you. In order to catch every essence of your release, Ellie switches to long yet fast licks up and down the length of you;  from your buzzing clit, over your clenching hole and even daring between those cute cheeks of yours to slick up that tighter hole. 

“Ellie, fuck, fuck, oh my-” Your hand searches for her, finding purchase grasping her dark hair, “I-I’m c-c-”

“Come on, Ellie!” 

“Hm?” Ellie perks up, tearing her gaze away from your ass. Embarrassment. Guilt. Shame. Ellie doesn’t know but it makes her feel hot. You’re still standing in a mix of darkness and moonlight, making sure Ellie and her dad have lunches for the day. 

For fucks sake, the whole reason Ellie agreed to help her dad out at the garage was so she could chat up his latest girlfriend every morning. 

“Ellie.” he tries ... .again. 

“Christ, yeah!” Ellie finally snaps, standing quickly from the kitchen table, “I’m c-” Ellie grunts out a cough and looks down, playing off her behaviour by collecting the dishes from the breakfast you made for her. “Let’s go,” she nods towards her dad so he’ll back off. 

He sighs. Deciding to try and end this by swiftly kissing you goodbye before stomping outside to wait for Ellie. 

“Thanks, for breakfast,” Ellie places the dishes in the sink, sending a timid look your way. You offer her a smile and a hum in answer, you were waiting for her to leave so you could go back to sleep. It breaks apart that ego of Ellie’s. 

“Do I get a kiss goodbye?” Ellie asks, amused as she watches your expression change when her question sinks in. Still shaking off the remains of her little fantasy, Ellie hovers awkwardly just a moment longer before she saunters off after her dad. 

Elbowing her as she passes, “You can kiss my ass,” you joke, laughing. Smiling. At her. It fills Ellie with a newfound determination. 

joel felt too personal idk

[call-me-strega]

Batfam Prompt #4: Granddad Lore

Do y’all ever think Alfred just drops Dad Lore™️ out of nowhere?

Like, maybe Bruce and Jason are arguing about Red Hood’s past kills and Alfred makes a sassy remark “If we’re holding everyone accountable for murders they’ve committed under influence when can I expect my court date?” Stunning them both into silence. By the time they get their wits about them, Alfred has already moved on to cleaning the kitchen and refuses to elaborate.

Or seeing Dick and Tim returned to the cave after fighting Condiment King: covered in ketchup, looking like a murder scene, with pickles in places pickles should not be. And Alfred sighs and says “ Oh this mess reminds me of the summer of ‘95.” And when Tim and Dick go “wtf?” try to question him on it he just sprays them with the bat hose.

Or he watches Damien and Cass, trying to train Goliath the bat-dragon to roll over and says “Oh, yes, this reminds me of the pet lizard I had in my boyhood, Spike, who turned out to be a crocodile.” And then leaves before either of them can ask more.

Or visiting Babs at the library with Duke and Steph and he stops to talk to an old woman at the counter. And when he comes get back they tease him about having a lady friend. And he’s like “ Don’t be ridiculous. I met Judith during the Lavender Scare. Helped her ward off suspicion so that she could keep her job as a secretary to the senator without being harassed.” And then he wanders off to find a new cookbook, leaving the three gob smacked.

Or someone’s telling a story about a mission over dinner and Alfred goes. “Ah yes, Master Bruce that reminds me of the summer your father dragged me on a boys trip to Guatemala to search for the chupacabra. Although that trip was how we met your mother.” And he continues eating while everyone stares at him because this is a Lore drop with bonus Wayne Lore???!

[gffa]

"You know, a Christmas tree down here would really freshen up the sewer smell--" LMAO BABS SLAPPING HER HAND OVER DICK'S FACE BECAUSE HE'S BEING A HORRIBLE GREMLIN AND THIS IS SERIOUS, DICK, WE HAVE VAMPIRES AT CHRISTMAS AND SANTA CLAUS HAS FUCKED OFF TO WHO-KNOWS-WHERE, THIS IS NO TIME TO BE TALKING ABOUT CHRISTMAS TREES, IS HILARIOUS ACTUALLY

Listen, they all love him, but you canNOT tell me that each and every one of his family haven't wanted to smack a hand over his mouth at LEAST once a week after some of the shit he says constantly.

[suzukiblu]

Day twenty-four of fic NaNoWriMo, obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon.

“I’d say maybe a picnic in the park or something but that seems incredibly dangerous unless I can pre-verify that Ivy’s in Arkham,” Tim muses, smacking a few more goons upside the skull. The others are already scattering to bolt, and there’s not much point in chasing them down; they broke up the deal and sent the suppliers running, and that was the main concern. Now they can track down their source and go from there. “And even then it’s kinda fifty-fifty.” 

“Yeah, you never know what she’s left out there,” Dick agrees. “Plus sometimes the things she’s left out there cross-pollinate, and then no one knows what’s out there, including her.” 

“Don’t remind me,” Tim says with a grimace, having unpleasant flashbacks to the skunkweed thorns and pitcher plant trees. Ivy’s creative enough without any accidental cross-pollination happening. 

“So what does planning a date have to do with that YJ-related op?” Dick inquires casually as the last of the grunts either hit the ground or flee. Tim does not freeze, because he's not fucking new here. 

“Nothing,” he lies. “I’m cycling through the projects I have scheduled to work on this week. Next there’s a stakeout uptown and some reoptimization of my utility belt organization.” 

“Planning dates is in the same category as ops and stakeouts and equipment maintenance, huh?” Dick asks with a laugh, holstering his sticks and then reaching over to ruffle his hair. “Never change, baby bird.” 

Tim is absolutely going to, but again, hopefully not before thirty and ideally while bringing Dick along for the ride. Dick would be a terrible supervillain and also probably pout if Tim put Superman in a kryptonite death trap to sit and think about what he’s done, but Tim loves him and wants him to be happy and also wants to make this awful fucking world a better place, and you don’t do that by just ditching all your friends and co-workers; you plan ahead and work with them, flaws and all. 

Anyway, Barbara would be good at being a supervillain, and she’d be a lot likelier to come along for the ride if Dick did. So that’s also another reason to recruit him. 

They’d both probably like to kill the Joker, anyway. Maybe they could make the rusty crowbar and shrapnel bomb plan a group activity? That’d be nice. 

Look, Batman doesn’t kill, obviously, but Tim isn’t Batman, Dick and Babs are also not Batman, and none of them ever intend to be. So “Batman doesn’t kill” is, in fact, only Bruce’s problem. 

“So I know you’re going to laugh at me for this, but you know the circus is in town next week, right?” Dick says, sparing him a smirk. Tim considers tripping him with his bo staff. “You know, for this totally theoretical and generic one-size-fits-all date that you definitely don’t have anyone in mind for.” 

“While I appreciate the suggestion, the person I don’t have anything in mind for has terrible self-esteem and I promised her someplace ‘nice’ for this totally theoretical and generic one-size-fits-all date,” Tim says, because he is definitely still in the closet here and he is not giving a Bat the clue of saying “they” to obfuscate Kon’s gender. Might as well light the Bat signal with a pride flag filter over it, for fuck’s sake. “She might take fifteen-dollar tickets and sawdust floors the wrong way.” 

“That just means she lacks taste, baby bird,” Dick hums easily, putting his hands on his hips and tapping a foot in consideration. “Hm. Well, Zatanna also happens to be in town next week.” 

Tim considers what it’d do to his self-esteem to watch Kon spend an hour-long show drooling over a gorgeous older woman in fishnets, spanks, and a sexy tuxedo jacket and decides not to go there. Also, there’s the issue of Zatanna potentially recognizing him, and also potentially recognizing Kon, who he doesn’t think she’s ever met but is both terrible at secret identities and a teen heartthrob superhero whose face is all over the place and also looks exactly like Superman’s on top of that. And Zatanna has definitely met Superman.

So yeah, that seems unlikely to end well either way. 

“Maybe,” he says, finally retracting his staff and putting it away. “I don’t know if she likes going to any kind of shows, honestly. Like–I just don’t know her that well yet. Theoretically, obviously.” 

“Obviously,” Dick agrees with a laugh, pulling out his grappling gun and wagging it at him. “Race you back to the Cave? Winner gets tips on how to charm a totally normal civilian who definitely doesn’t fight crime in a cheerleader skirt.” 

Tim has no idea how he feels about the fact Dick is so certain Cissie is the one he’s trying to plan a date for. Then again, Cissie is the one who yelled at half the Justice League. So maybe he sort of understands the assumption. 

Kon looks better in a crop top, though, Tim privately promises himself to never actually say out loud. Like, he definitely does look better, in Tim’s opinion, but a) Cissie would shoot him for said opinion and b) Kon would be unbearably smug about said opinion. And unfortunately, Tim finds Kon’s preening smugness increasingly charming, so he really can’t be doing that to himself. 

He was so damn proud of himself about the fucking crop top, the bastard. Tim should burn it. Or buy him twenty more. One or the other. 

The shorts he’s just not going to think about right now. Like. Ever again. 

He’s pretty sure they’d work better with a thong than boxer briefs, though. Or just going commando outright, maybe. Tactile telekinesis probably makes chafing less of a concern, Tim figures. 

Not that he’s thought about that. At all. In any way. Ever. 

Definitely not. 

Dick fires his grapple and takes off. Tim pretends to be extremely heterosexual about Cissie and not even slightly gay about Kon, though he has very little idea how to actually do that, and rushes after him. There’s basically no way he’s actually going to beat Dick unless criminal activity interferes or Dick just lets him beat him, of course, because Dick’s been flying all his life and flying in specifically Gotham since he was literally prepubescent, and Tim has just been sneaking around random rooftops and alleyways and only actually known how to do a basic somersault for a couple of years, much less any real acrobatics or aerial work. So like, there’s definitely a skill gap there. 

Might as well chuck a flying fish at a hummingbird and see who comes out ahead, really. 

Technically, though, Dick mostly works out of Bludhaven these days, so technically . . . 

Look, Tim just so happens to know about certain construction-related shortcuts that may or may not be currently relevant thanks to some surprise rogue attacks last week, and even if he weren’t pretending to be heterosexual about Cissie he’d be trying to beat Dick back to get first dibs on Alfred’s jaffa cakes, so . . . 

The jaffa cakes are delicious, though the dating advice is unfortunately irrelevant. 

Tim appreciates the thought, at least.

[flame-343]

PROMPT

The Bats™ CONSTANTLY show up unannounced for info, hangout time ECT. Babs will be chilling on her computer casually stalking someone for info and when she turns to take a sip of tea from her mug, Bruce is there leaning over her, another time she was making some eggs and bacon and out of nowhere Jason just appeared behind her saying she needed to add more pepper. They keep randomly showing up that when she doesn't want to deal with them, she'll wip out "Woody" a wooden brome and smack them with it for either scaring her or not leaving her alone. Even after she got into the wheelchair, she just added an extender with some grip and still uses it. Batman brooding in the left corner of the ceiling? No problem she'll just swat him down for ya!

[albatmobile]

I need another fic where jayroy x reader is in the league for… reasons 🫣

I also now need this 😫

the other fic (x)

a conundrum of redheaded proportions

next: [2] || ao3

𓅪 Rated: E | 4k includes: misunderstandings, confessions, selectively mute!reader, blow jobs, vaginal sex, deep throating, praise kink, spitroasting, begging, lots of smut y'all ur welcome, voyeurism, jealousy, Justice league AU

𓅪 previous hookup fem!reader x jason todd, eventual fem!reader x roy harper, eventual fem!reader x jason todd x roy harper

my Hero OC! Cardinal comes from this series: tumblr [1] [2] | ao3

It's a well-known fact amongst The League that you like redheads.

From your first fling with Wally, drunken kiss with Kori, to your summer romance with Kate and that one-time thing with Jason back when his locks were more fiery than his personality, you’ve always seemed to gravitate towards red. 

Hell, he’d even heard rumors that you’d been in a threesome with Babs and Artemis on your mission to Themyscira a summer or so ago. 

What Roy can’t figure out is why you’ve never even talked to him let alone looked at him.

Is he a defective redhead or something?

Just approach her, they said.

Just introduce yourself, they said.

Well, he’s fucking tried.

You aren’t one to talk in uniform and only the redheads in the league, excluding Roy, know what you look like underneath your infamous, skin-tight burgundy vinyl. 

And then, there you are.

Right in front of him.

Roy doesn’t realize his breath’s stopped until his head begins to feel faint and he’s forced to gulp in air desperately like Spongebob in that one episode.

And then you’re walking toward him.

Jason shifts beside him, but Roy’s more focused on you.

Your hips sway hypnotically with each purposeful step you take closer, pulling Roy deeper into your unforgiving trance.

Your hand makes a tiny wave, so tiny Roy’s sure if he blinked he’d miss it, right at him.

No fucking way.

Roy’s hand shoots up with a nervous wave back that stills as soon as you shoot him a questioning head tilt. He hears the leather of Jason’s jacket shift from behind him and looks just in time to see his friend finish waving at you.

Roy isn’t salty.

“There’s no way she’s hot under that shit,” he mutters lowly to his friend once you’ve passed by.

Roy’s salty.

“I fucked her,” Jason says the statement like it’s an actual response and not just a blatant brag.

“Yeah,” Roy huffs, focusing back on packing up his gym bag, “so?”

“So,” Jason quirks a knowing brow, “you dissing my taste in women?”

“No!” Roy cries out, then slumps back against the locker room bench with a groan. “Is there something wrong with me, Jay? Am I the ugly one?”

“What does your mug being a mess have to do with her?” 

Jason’s never had a quiet voice. His baritone growl always demanded attention whether he meant it to or not. Unfortunately for Roy, this time it seems to have attracted your attention because your usual confident gate stutters just slightly enough for Roy to take notice.

As soon as you’re out of sight, Roy smacks Jason in the arm, yelping slightly when he retaliates with full force. 

“Jesus, dude. You tryin’ to kill me, or something?” Roy groans.

“You tryin’ to offend me, or something?” Jason mocks him.

Roy finishes zipping up his bag with a dramatic zip and huff, “Course not. Sorry, Jaybird.”

Another quick hit to Roy’s already undoubtedly bruised arm.

“Not here,” Jason chastises him, his nose wrinkling easily at the offending nickname. 

Roy watches as he looks towards all the hidden cameras in the room, something they’d both mapped out within the first few days of being welcomed aboard the Watchtower.

“For sure,” Roy agrees distractedly as he catches a glimpse of Barry’s outfit and briefly mistakes it for you. “Sorry, I’m just out of it today.”

“So I see,” Jason says, raising an easy brow. 

“Nothing gets passed you now, eh?” Roy tries to joke but Jason only returns him with a knowing, read: asshole-ish, look like he’s already figured Roy out and, hell, he probably has. He catches a whiff of his uniform and winces, picking distastefully at the fabric on the chest of his sweaty Arsenal getup. “Fuck off, man,” he huffs. “Let’s just eat so we can get the fuck out of these monkey suits.” 

𓅪𓅪𓅪

The cafeteria is nearly empty at this hour, Roy notes with a pleased hum. He quickly becomes distracted, however, by the heavenly smells coming from the kitchen.

Algie and Rita are behind the counter again tonight, so Roy knows the food’s going to be fire. 

“Ladies,” Roy greets playfully with a waggle of his brows at the elderly women. As a result, they award him with an extra scoop of mashed potatoes. Score!

Jason greets them politely before following behind Roy to the closest table.

It’s always quiet around this hour, though it doesn’t mean heroes are necessarily holed up asleep in their rooms. Mission stragglers, graveyard shift Watchtower workers and heroes zeta-tubing in for their debriefs are constantly ongoing. In quiet moments like this, though, Roy really does feel like it’s just him and Jay in space.

“So, you going to tell me what’s been bugging you tonight?” Jason asks though Roy thinks he already knows.

Roy glances around the empty cafeteria, save for a single table taken in the way back, before leaning in to whisper anyway. “It’s that chick.”

Jason shoots the redhead an unimpressed look. “Chick, seriously?” he admonishes Roy.

Roy sighs, pushing around the mashed potatoes on his tray, “I’m not gonna say her name when you already know.”

Jason simply hums in response as he unlocks and removes his helmet to eat.

Roy has never been quiet when it comes to the people he’s interested in and, sure, that’s how it started off with you, but you’re different. 

No, literally, you don’t speak. 

Not that you can’t, per se, just selectively and never to Roy.

Except one time. Your first mission alone with him.

Roy was usually unable to understand your movements, signals and signs outside the costume (not that you were ever caught dead on the Watchtower out of costume). After all the years of battling side by side on missions, Roy knows your battlefield code like the back of his hand. Slight shift of your head to the right: back you up, shift to the left: back up, all the way down to your cute little hand movements that call out battle strategy. 

Quiet but mighty. Never one to mess with. 

Roy knows firsthand.

The one thing he’d never known until that one time, though? Your voice.

It was during the midst of a battle with Enchantress and Gorilla Grodd. You and Roy had been put in charge of reconnaissance for team Alpha when a henchman strayed way too close to the tree Roy was stationed behind. 

You’d clicked your comm button three times to alert Roy, but it was already too late. 

The guard startled and went for his radio, forcing Roy to draw an arrow. Though the hit itself was quiet, the thud of the man’s armored body was loud enough to draw the attention of everyone in the general vicinity. 

Cutely enough, you turned to Roy, watching as he drew his bow and nodded to you as you got into a defensive position. 

He then proceeded to watch you take on tens of henchmen at a time, disarming their guns before they could even aim them. It was a shame that Roy’d been so preoccupied with your safety, no, namely distracted by how the shiny material of your suit stretched across your huge ass, to focus on protecting himself.

Up until that point, everything had been going smoothly. That is, until-

“ROY!”

You weren’t supposed to use names other than alias’ out of the field, but your slip-up had seemed so unintentional he didn’t need to see underneath the mask to know you were panicking. He could hear your regret in your loud silence for allowing your voice to slip through and leak into the chilly night air.

Your body crashed into his with such a ferocious force, that he had no choice but to shift out of the way. He hit the ground and you landed on top of him just in time for him to avoid the deadly ray of Enchantress’ incantation. 

You, however? Not so much. 

By jumping in front of Roy, you’d taken the brunt of the attack practically head-on.

The shock of hearing his name from you lasted mere milliseconds before you were on the ground, screaming bloody murder under the intense pain from the spell you’d just saved Roy from. He’d never thanked you for taking a proverbial bullet of kinds for him, but it wasn’t like he hadn’t at least tried. You’d been conveniently absent from the post-mission debrief and, after checking out the empty med bay, Roy hung around outside the women’s locker room long enough to get booted by a wary Supes. 

Eventually, Roy gave up trying to catch you and, thus, his ‘thank you’ went unsaid.

And now, here you are. Again.

Seeing you twice in one night, Roy feels like he’s hit the jackpot. 

Jason, being the asshole he is, waves you over as soon as his eyes catch yours.

Your thick thighs move languidly, shifting from side to side with each tantalizing sway of your perfect figure. You’re stunning.

Roy clears his throat, coming back down to the present moment just in time for Jason to… introduce the two of you to each other. Huh?

Jason and Roy are the only ones in the cafeteria, Algie and Rita having reverted back to stirring pots in the back kitchen. 

It’d be weird if they made you sit alone, right? 

Right? 

That has to be why Jason is doing all of this.

Your flashy red stops right in front of him before he has a chance to think further on the topic. At this point, you’re close enough that your enchanting perfume has slowly started to invade his senses. Your scent quickly takes complete hold over him, making you the only thing he can focus on.

At Roy’s silent staring, Jason clears his throat, “Roy, meet Cardinal. Cardinal, Roy.”

Even behind the security of his domino mask, Roy can practically see the mirth in the outlaw’s emerald eyes. 

Roy’s completely lost for words. 

Luckily, it doesn’t seem to be an issue with you very much being in the same boat. 

He watches your every minute movement diligently so as not to miss this crucial moment. His eyes openly flick over your curves while your attention is diverted toward the raven-haired man next to you. 

It’s been years since Roy’s been this close to you and he can’t help but greedily drink your hypnotizing presence down to the last drop like a fucking dog. If Elastic Man and Booster Gold hadn’t been occupying the only other table in the cafeteria, Roy would take you right here and now, Jason’s voyeur-ass be damned. 

Roy watches as you huff slightly and shoulder his best friend’s arm lightly. Jason laughs easily at the cute contact, leaving Roy to wish he knew you well enough to be in on the joke, too. Well, to be honest, he just wishes he knew you period.

Roy clears his throat, going along with unnecessary niceties by extending his hand out to you with a false confidence he definitely wasn’t feeling. “What’s up, babe?” he greets overly casual.

Your head continues to face him head-on. He’s pretty sure if he could see anything under the mask you’d be wearing a deadpan stare. The two of you have known of each other for years, working alongside each other the entire time- so, why are you being introduced to Roy and why is he acting like a douche?

He watches you turn to Jason and point at yourself, then your head, then Roy and Jason seems to understand immediately. 

“Yeah, well, I figured I’d just properly introduce you guys,” he says, running a sheepish hand through his grey streak. “I don’t know,” he trails off with a sexy laugh that has even Roy fawning over him.

Roy really doesn’t stand a chance with Jason here. 

Fuck.

Roy supposes you shoot him another deadpan glare because Jason, honest to god, giggles. 

Fuck.

How is Roy supposed to compete with Jay’s rugged attractiveness when Roy’s shorter with half the game?

What happened to the awkward Jason Roy’d met all those years prior?

No, seriously, Jason had always been an awkward fuck, but for some reason, it seemed to work for him. Roy, on the other hand, was spontaneous, loud, over-the-top and seemed to drive off every promising prospect in sight, namely you.

You give Roy a timid wave that has Jason raising a brow, but Roy just responds earnestly. “Big fan of your work, Cardinal,” Roy says, leaning in across the table to get closer to you before he can stop himself. “Even bigger fan of that suit, beautiful.”

The redhead watches as your arms subconsciously move to cover your stomach and instantly backs off when Jason pushes him back into his seat.

“You’ll have to excuse my friend,” Jason says. “He hasn’t gotten laid since he got sober.”

He hears your tiny “oh” whispered into the quiet of the cafeteria and nearly loses it.

He wants you.

He needs you. 

“It’s true. I’m pathetic,” is what he ends up choking out.

Your head tilts at him with your hand floating to where your mouth is hidden under your vinyl confines. You look Jason’s way again before Roy hears your melodic giggle. He swears the gates of heaven have opened. He can practically hear the harps now as he watches the little shakes in your shoulders move in time with the angelic noise.

Saint Peter, Roy pleads with whatever fuckers are out there, please call my fucking name. Preferably soon… No, preferably now while you’re still amused by his obnoxious, whore-like behavior.

“Would you want to sit?” Jason motions to the chair you’re standing behind which sits right between Jason and Roy. You glance down at your tray which has a grab-n-go sandwich on it from one of the fridges right next to the food counter then back up at Roy. “It’s cool if not. I know idiot over here can be a lot.”

“Hey, I resent that.”

“I’m sure you do, buddy,” Jason says, picking lightly at his chicken before finally taking a bite. 

Jason always said the food here was good, but Roy knows it’s nothing compared to Alfred’s cooking back home.

Your giggling cuts off their old-married couple banter just like that. In fact, your laughter draws the attention of both men at the table so instantaneously that neither has time to cover up their reactions to the unfamiliar sound they’ve been lucky enough to hear twice now tonight.

Jason’s fork freezes momentarily on the way to his mouth before he quickly moves as if it’d never happened. Roy, on the other hand, remains completely stupefied by your captivating, seemingly effortless charm.

He knows deep down that there’s no way you’ll actually stay, though it doesn’t stop him from fantasizing about you ripping off your mask for him to take in what’s been forbidden for all these years. Part of him still holds out hope that, because it’s just him and Jason, you’ll actually do it, that you’ll actually give in and stay. Maybe the ripping off the mask is a bit too extreme, Roy mentally berates himself. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll lift the mask up past your nose and, at the very least, maybe you’ll just stay.

He watches with bated breath as you glance down at the seat, only to have his stomach sink seconds later when you shake your head. You pick up your sandwich and motion with your head toward the exit. 

Your continued lack of verbal response further proves there’s no way you’d ever even think about lifting up your mask to eat with Roy here. 

He is defective. 

“No worries,” Roy says as he waves you off with a jerky, then overly casual nature. 

Holy fuck, why can’t he just act normal around you?

“We’re usually in here around this hour if you ever do want to meet up,” Jason adds helpfully. Roy’ll be sure to thank him later for it. That is, right after he finishes kicking his ass for putting him through this embarrassment. “It’s usually just us down here at this hour, anyway. It’d be nice to catch up.”

You nod eagerly at both of them, leaving Jason to laugh. 

Roy watches you rub anxiously at your forearm, only to spur into action when your tray nearly goes tumbling because of it. You catch the sandwich easily and Roy catches the tray before it can even get close to the ground, but that doesn’t stop you from bending down, too.

At the sight of the tray safe in his hand, you, still bent over, look up, causing your noses to bump. 

“I can take care of you,” Roy’s grave voice is nearly a whisper in the quiet of the large room. You gasp slightly and startle backward, causing Roy to backtrack in a slightly higher-pitched voice. “They tray, I mean,” he clears his throat until his voice reaches its normal timbre. “I can take care of the tray for you.”

You seem to be momentarily frozen, much to Roy’s surprise, though it doesn’t last for long. Soon, you’re nodding distractedly, backing away from their table all the while. 

With your wrapped sandwich in one hand, you use the other to give a hasty thumbs up.

Roy waves you off with a defeated smile, bidding you a cursory goodnight.

Then you’re turning on your heel, speeding for the exit at a pace even Wally wouldn’t be able to keep up with.

He fucked up.

Neither he nor Jason can pull their eyes off you as you saunter away. 

Roy bites down harder on his chapped, bottom lip with each stomp of your heels as it jiggles your infamous cheeks in the process. Damn, what Roy wouldn’t do to get his hands on as much of your ass as he could manage. He knows there’s no way your ass would fit in the palms of his hands, but damn, if the thought alone doesn’t leave him drooling.

He doesn’t even notice the tent forming in his lap until Jason shoots him an unimpressed stare. 

“You’ve got it bad, bro,” Jason mutters into his water glass. 

𓅪𓅪𓅪

Roy does have it bad.

So bad that he makes his best friend take care of the raging boner you’d left him with.

Jason wasn’t lying when he said Roy hadn’t been laid since he’d sobered up around two years ago, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t jacking it almost every night. He’s found that the showers between the hours of four and five am are a safe haven for him to quickly get off, but tonight he needs something more.

Tonight’s different.

Roy presses Jason against the tiled wall and fucks into his tight ass all while imagining your wet pussy and fucked-out face. Roy comes embarrassingly fast, something Jason doesn’t let slide. He puts Roy to work, forcing his dick down his throat with a rough hand gripping his fiery hair until he comes all over Roy’s freckled face with a grunt.

It’s good and fine and whatever… Jason’s extremely attractive- that’s not the issue. 

The issue is that he’s not you.

Jason takes one look at Roy’s constipated face and sighs, wiping gently at the remaining beads of come on the tip of his cock with Roy’s discarded boxers.

“Just talk to her,” he says before leaving Roy to drown under the stream of his post-nut misery.

𓅪𓅪𓅪

He’s rounding the corner to his dorm room in his towel when he runs right smack into you and you’re…

“Holy shit,” Roy can’t help the airy moan that escapes at the sight of you in a loosely tied silk robe- only a silk robe.

You’re breathtaking. 

Your billowing hair, gleaming eyes and, overall, sinful features leave Roy’s mouth hanging open. Speaking of mouths, your supple, pouty lips are screaming at Roy to slip his dick between them and choke you with his length until he sees tears in the corners of your sex-doll eyes. 

Even in the fluorescent lights of the Watchtower hallways, your skin softly glows, radiating deep down into Roy’s bones. 

He needs to get his hands on you. 

Your features all meld together perfectly in a way that makes sense and he wonders how he ever could’ve imagined you to look any other way.

You tilt your head at him but don’t make to pass. It’s like you’re captivated by his captivation and, if anything, it only serves to captivate Roy further. 

You seem somewhat startled, though it’s obvious you’re trying to hide it. Roy wishes he could control his reaction; he really does, but you don’t know what you’re doing to him. Your startled face steadily shifts, leaving Roy to wonder if maybe you do. Maybe you know exactly what kind of effect you’re having on him. 

The teasing glint in your eyes seems to point to the latter and it’s making Roy weak in his already wobbly knees.

The sight of your costumed-self in the past has been enough to render him speechless. Now you’re here, standing in front of Roy’s rabid form with your robe steadily slipping from your silky shoulder and further down your bicep. 

Needless to say, the one-on-one contact with you is dizzying. It’s as if he’s drowning in the thick syrup of your honey-sweet figure without you ever having uttered a word other than his name. 

A succubus of sorts, for sure.

You’re hypnotizing and Roy knows he’s yet to pick his jaw up off the floor but can’t bring himself to stop. 

A steady breeze tickles at his mid-drift and it’s then he realizes he’s also forgotten to pick up his fucking towel in the process.

While Roy’s been completely stupefied by your ethereal features, you’ve been staring at his half-mast cock with an unreadable look. Roy inwardly groans when he realizes that Jason would probably know what it meant but erases the thought as soon as it pops into his head.

Roy looks down at his freckled, pink-tipped dick, then back up at you, then back down again and back up.

“Jeez,” he spouts, scrambling to the floor to snatch up the Justice League embroidered towels they supplied in the locker rooms. “Sorry,” his voice is thick with want as he squeezes his words out from behind a lump in his throat you’ve conveniently caused. “Didn’t see you there,” he says once he’s popped back up and secured his towel. “You alright?”

Your eyes flick down to his now completely erect cock that’s covered once again by his towel, then back up to his light green eyes. He follows the motion self-consciously, eagerly awaiting your next move. 

You’re a wild card to him. He can truly say you’re one of the few people he’s unable to read and one of the only people that he never knows what you’re going to do next. 

You’re a captivating mystery, an enigma for Roy’s puzzle-loving brain to tirelessly work at. And here you are, revealing almost everything to him while still revealing absolutely nothing. 

You nod and he watches as a magnificent blush coats your cheeks, though not the ones he’s been carnally craving.

“Sorry,” Roy sputters again as you continue past him like nothing had even happened. Like Roy hadn’t been staring at you for two minutes straight. 

You shake your head easily as if to say you don’t care, but Roy hopes you do. 

You continue past him with your usual confident stride, leaving Roy to wonder how you can possibly expect him to move at all with the trance you’ve put on him. His wobbly knees struggle to remain upright as your silent padding grows more and more distant.

Your scent lingers in the air around him like a cruel reminder of what could’ve been.

When he’s finally able, he turns around to watch your ass jiggle further and further down the hall with a heavy heart and even heavier blue balls. His heart nearly stops when you actually turn around to see if he’s still there, only to blush and duck your head back around on account of his blatant staring.

And so, the chase continues.

A/N: i’ve fully fallen in love w my characterization of roy and i’m absolutely WRECKED about it ok? i hope u feel the same and let me know if u do! ALSO ok I wrote this back in March (before I broke my pinky lol) but I did edit recently, but if it sounds a bit off from my current stuff that’s why :,P

Important: Cardinal is not usually mute, I take a lot of her hero design from Black Bat and thought it would be cool to include another aspect of Cassandra's character, hence this!

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[darklydeliciousdesires]

Claire, I'm squealing that you've opened drabble requests again! It took me a minute to decide, but I'd love to read 4. “Don’t play games with me, sweetheart. You won’t like it when I play them back.” with Arthur Shelby please!! (I was tempted to ask for Sean Wallace bc I miss that character, but I don't think I've read anything Arthur related from you before?)

Hey babe! Thank you for sending this in :)

I've done a couple for Arthur in the past and I've just checked and yes, you've read them <3 but it was nice to write for him again since he isn't one of my usuals. I hope you like it!

You can feel his eyes on you, walking the narrow passage between the pub you’ve just left and the main road, the summer air whipping warm over your bare shoulders. Turning your head a fraction, you see him behind you, your hands reaching to grasp the hem of your dress and slowly lift it, revealing exactly what you want him to see.  

“Someone’s forgot her knickers,” Arthur grunts, his eyes widening to see your bare bum revealed.  

You hum a chuckle, your back tingling as you sense him quicken his steps. “Not forgotten, misplaced. I wonder where they might be? Perhaps a certain tall, handsome man should check his pocket.” 

Turning to watch him pat down his suit, his eyes narrow as he slips his hand into the pocket, pulling the white lace undies from within, his gritty laugh rumbling. “Don’t play games with me, sweetheart. You won’t like it when I play them back.” 

Reaching for him, you yank him close by his tie, desire dancing in your eyes. “Yes, I will. After all, Arthur, that’s the reason why I play.”  

The kisses you begin to lay against his neck send little pin pricks of desire through him, and he wants to give in to it, more than you could ever understand, but Arthur Shelby is a man who will not be dictated to over little flights of fancy from his lady.  

Taking your hand, he walks you through the passage and out onto the road, reaching the end where your house is located. He pauses at the door, kissing you with the kind of want that has your tummy fizzing pleasantly, your arousal beginning to pulse.  

He presses himself against you, reminding you what it is to feel his weight upon you, mouth gliding to your neck, hands grasping your bare bum, lifting your dress and giving it a hard smack that sends you gasping against his mouth. You are, as ever, rendered a molten mess of a woman, and he hasn’t even taken your clothes off yet. He isn’t going to either.  

“Now I’ve got you home safe, I’ll say g’night, love.” 

Confusion flashes across your face. “You’re not spending the night?” 

“Nah,” he grins, winking. “Not tonight, bab. Told you, didn’t I? You won’t like it when I play back. Ta-rar a bit. See ya tomorrow.” 

You can hear the earthy rumble of his chuckle as he walks away, leaving you standing there stewing in the utter indignance of being played at your own game.  

[geraldmariaivo]

Most of the batfam are liminal enough that some subconscious part of them thinks they have powers like ghosts, which is why sometimes they’ll drop something they expected to float or walk into walls face first w/o looking

That’s hilarious actually. I’m imagining Bruce dropping his glass at a gala and it being brushed off by everyone else as having one to many drinks already, meanwhile Bruce is seriously considering whether or not one of his drinks was spiked because he hasn’t had that much to drink. He thought it would be worse when he did it as Batman, but his coworkers and civilians find it humanizing.

Tim runs on roughly six hours of sleep a week anyway, so him dropping things and running into walls expecting to go through them is just brushed off as him being sleep-deprived.

If anyone in crime alley saw Red Hood doing anything like that, no they didn’t.

Steph is confused every time she smacks into a table after low-key expecting to clip through it, but takes the hint that maybe she needs some time to relax.

Damian absolutely refuses to admit that he fell flat on his face on the floor because he expected to go through the floor, but Alfred the cat was his only witness anyway.

Everyone suspects that Cass has done this sort of thing, but nobody except Alfred has seen it.

Dick runs into walls constantly. All the time. There’s a group document specifically for when someone sees him clearly run into a wall because he was expecting to go through it.

Babs tried to flop out the back of her wheelchair and onto her bed. She ended up flipping over her wheelchair.

[haveihitanerve]

Four Times the Batkids Forget They're Adopted, and The One Time Damian Forgets He Isn't

It had started off as a joke, as most things do, and Dick meant nothing behind it, really. It was amusing to him, actually, to tell his coworkers things about Batman and pass it off as his father. “Oh my dad? Yeah hes not big on talking. He loves showing me he cares though.” (this was, of course, in reference to Batman doing three back flips and a kick split when Nightwing had patrolled with him the other day, a classic Nightwing move) But it soon…went deeper. Dick stopped making jokes out of it, and actually began listing things about Bruce. About his Dad. It didn't help that his police friends were actually interested. “So did you and the old man do anything fun over the weekend?” Dick thought back to how he had wanted to surprise Bruce by stopping by for dinner and instead had ended up in the sewer eating granola bars on a stakeout for killer croc, who had escaped. Again. “Oh yeah we had a picnic.” Dick nodded, smiling at Randy. “Yeah. He’s, he’s kinda bad at remembering when to eat a meal on time and all that.” Dick laughed. “Its something I share too. Must be genetics.” He rolled his eyes. Randy laughed, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “I hear you. My old man smoked all the live long day. I try to keep it down, but that addiction gene is just strong eh?” Dick chuckled. “Yeah I guess.” His phone buzzed in his pocket and he waved to Randy, turning to tug it out. It was one, simple message from Babs. “Ur adopted genius. What genes.” 

Jason didn't even know how they had gotten on the topic. But here they were. “Yes. I got my mothers hair, of course, but I get my temper from my father.” Artemis was saying. “I have parents.” Bizarro grunted. Roy laughed, smacking him on the shoulder. “Well you certainly didn't get Kal’s looks buddy. But you do have his killer hair.” Starfire laughed. “That is true. I, for one, share my parents hair and have my fathers powers. But truly the best gene I was given were my mothers eyes.” They all turned to Jason. “What about you?” Roy asked. Jason scratched the back of his neck. “Uh, I used to have my dads eyes but um after the pit y'know,” He waved to his now green eyes. “And actually I have my dads dark black hair, and he’s graying early too, which might be why my white streak is so prominent.” They nodded in agreement. “But yeah, hes actually a little taller than me so maybe I’ll still grow a few inches but uh yeah. I don't… remember my mother enough to talk about her.” “Dang man. I wish we could meet your dad.” Roy murmured, laying a comforting hand on Jason’s shoulder. “Then we could really compare. I mean-” He laughed. “You sound like his carbon copy.” Jason frowned at his friend. “What do you mean? You’ve met Bruce?” They stared at him. “Jason,” Artemis began slowly. “Aren't you adopted?” 

Tim hunched over the information form, eyes straining to read the small print. His hand reached up to stifle a yawn and he settled for a sigh instead. It was late, but Tim needed to get the form done before he went to bed, otherwise everything would be far too stressful in the morning. He reached over and grabbed his coffee mug, a dark black cup that had a red R painted on it poorly. Bruce had made it for him a few years ago when he had first become Red Robin. He sipped it, staring down at the medical form. “Gods I hate having to do this.” He muttered, but reluctantly grabbed the thick medical binder Alfred had obligingly gotten for him when he had asked for medical records of the family. Tim did not under any circumstances, want to have to sit at the doctors office the next day and somehow lie his way through all the medical questions relating to his family history. He didn't have the time nor patience for it, and it was crucial he was given proper medical advice what with his missing spleen. “Any history of heart issues Bruce?” Tim muttered, flipping back past Martha and Thomas to Bruce’s great great great grandfather. “Nope, guess not.” Tim was halfway through the form when he realized the blood coursing through his veins wasn't Bruce’s. 

Steph rubbed a hand across her belly, staring at the monitor. “Your baby looks good Ms. Brown. They’re at the proper stage. Due in about two months. We’ll see you back here for your next check up.” “thank you doctor.” Steph murmured, sliding off the bed and dressing quickly before hurrying out to her car. The car door slammed shut behind her and she breathed, pressing her forehead to the steering wheel. Her phone buzzed. She lifted it and pressed it to her ear, hitting accept. “Hello?” “hey Steph.” Bruce’s voice vibrated through the phone. “How was your doctors appointment?” Steph gave a bitter laugh. “Everything looks good. The baby will come in about two months.” “Thats good. Thats real good.” Steph nodded, eyes closed. “You doing okay Stephanie?” Bruce asked, voice soft. “I don't know.” her voice broke and she squeezed her eyes shut, fighting tears. “I just- I’m so scared Bruce. So scared.” Bruce hummed comfortingly through the phone. “I know Steph. Its scary. And parenting, its hard.” Steph coughed out a watery chuckle. “Was that a hit?” She muttered, rubbing a hand over her face. Bruce chuckled. “No. Baby it wasn't. And just think, you’ll get to see all the firsts I didn't get with you. Their first steps. Their first wave. You might even get to hear them say mama before i kidnap- i mean adopt him or her.” Steph laughed again, and it sounded less watery. “Yeah. Well, when do kids start walking?” She asked in interest, sniffing and sitting up straight again. Bruce hummed. “Well i started walking almost immediately, but Im special.” Steph laughed. “Of course.” “alfred said i first started talking when I was around thirteen months old, and Talia said Damian was walking by ten, but she could have been lying.” Steph nodded. “Tell me more.” She whispered. Bruce obliged, happy to distract her. “Oh and whats probably going to be your favorite, babies, or at least I did, start laughing at around four months.” “laughing?” Steph gasped. “Oh Brucie!!! Thats too funny! Little chubby baby you, the future batman, laughing!” She cooed. She could almost feel his eye roll through the phone and stifled her laugh. “So yeah..” Bruce finished. “You should expect your kiddo to start walking around then. And laughing probably sooner. I would have if you'd be in my life at that time.” Steph was quiet. “Thank you B.” He hummed. “Anytime Steph. I’ll always be here to help you.” “Wait wait wait-” a new voice joined in the background of Bruce. “Are you guys serious right now?” Steph identified it as Jason. “What?” Bruce asked puzzled. “B, Stephs adopted. Her kid is as likely to walk at the same time you did as when she did!” 

“Damian?” “Go away Drake.” Damian called back, riffling through the papers. “Dami?” Tim poked his head into his younger brothers room. “Oh hey kiddo. Whatcha doing?” “I am busy Timothy.” Damian countered in annoyance, shoving the box back under his bed and moving to his desk. “What are you looking for?” Tim asked puzzled. Damian ignored him. “Dami.” “Go away Timothy.” Tim crossed his arms, leaning against the doorframe. “Come on Baby Bird. Tell me.” Damian shook his head, covering the blush on his cheeks by poking behind the desk. “Damian.” Tim’s hand was suddenly on his back. Damian jumped. Tim held up his hands in surrender. “Just tell me. I’m sure I can help you find it.” Damian sighed in acceptance, cheeks pink. “I have.. Lost my adoption papers.” He muttered, staring at the floor. But Tim didn't laugh or ridicule him. In fact, when he looked up, his brother seemed thoughtful. “Well i know me and dick and jason have them hung over our beds…” His gaze drifted to the very clearly empty space above Damians bed. “I know.” Damian jerked his head in a nod. “That is why I wished to find it.” Tim nodded in understanding. “Well, lets go look in the den. Thats where Alfred keeps all the legal stuff.” Damian trailed after his brother to the living room and watched as he opened the cabinet and pulled out three boxes. “You look through this one, I’ll search these two.” Tim ordered. Damian nodded, accepting the box. It was where Alfred found them, two hours later, broom in hand. “My dear sirs, what are you doing?” The butler asked in bafflement. “Looking for Damians adoption record.” Tim answered, nose still in some papers. Alfred looked at them. “Master Tim. Master Damian.” The two boys looked up. “Yes Alfred?” Tim asked. Alfred's face was fond and utterly confused. “Master Damian is not adopted. He is Master Bruce’s blood son.” 

@nonepizzawithleftglitter @zombiewithaflowercrown

you asked and you shall recieve!

[livinlikebailey]

Marauders as things my friend group has said

“Sometimes I forget how many dead people there are.” - Sirius @ Regulus during a family history lesson.

“ I’m gonna bite your toes while you’re sleeping,,, nibble, nibble, nibble” - a drunk Barty @ Evan who is ignoring him.

James: Drops phone on his face. James: claps friends theme song. James: picks phone back up like nothing happened.

“I’m a bi guy, a simple bi guy and I am 99% Lilly Evans and 1% Regulus Black.” - James Potter

“ Why do all the cute ones gotta be Deatheaters?” - Rita @ Bellatrix

“Iron chickens do not have iron testicals” - a very drunk Sirius @ an unfortunately sober Remus.

“I have decided that i am a snack it just no one is hungry” - Peter

Marlene: Climbs on train track bridge Dorcas: “Oh you are so fucking dumb, I look away for 2 seconds”

“No bite, no smile!” - Remus @ James who is trying to take a picture of him too close to the full moon.

“If i was there i’d slap her i don't care if she's 9” - Mary to lily after hearing about the shit her sister was doing to her. “James, I am a pussy.” - Peter to James about the forbidden forest.

“I would be James’ sugar bab- AHH!” - Lily about James to Mary.

“I have to go through all my saves and delete the videos of him because he turned out to be a pedophile… Hey! I had a chance with him” - Remus probably at some point.

“Was that CORPSE? Woop!” - Drunk Remus at a party.

Remus: “ughhhh” Sirius: “what?” Remus: “I hurt and I'm dying.” Sirius: “don't die, that's for kids”

Barty : sits up really quick "guys I just swallowed the nail, it's in my throat." Barty: proceeds to cough up the nail

Pandora: shows Regulus a picture she drew "this is cute" Regulus: "you're cute. wait that didn't go how I wanted it to.”

Barty: “RACCOON WORLDS DOMINATION”

Sirius: “Do I look like a freaking rat?” Regulus: ….. Sirius: “Don't answer that”

Effie: hears a song playing from james’ room “I used to listen to this song in grade school.” James: “Oh so it's really old then.”

Remus: "sips coffee stressfully"

Barty: "seductively eats toes"

Evan: "for your next random gift I'll get you a screwdriver Barty: "thanks I'm gonna kill myself with it"

Marlene: whining "mom James got me addicted to cocaine" wait I mean Crack cookies" - Marlene @ Effie

Nymphadora: tries to lick cat. Andromeda: "don't lick the kitty." Dora: proceeds to lick cat.

Barty: "school sh**tings" gives thumbs up

Sirius: shows Remus their high heels Remus: "okay whore" smacks hand over mouth "wait i- that wasn't supposed to come out" Sirius: laughs their ass off

James: yells across the store to mom “mom!" Random person at the checkout: looks at James "I am not mom."

“Effie’s a Milf” - Marlene

“I don't have nothing, other than a few std's” -Remus

“You can eat half a mermaid before you're a cannibal” - Pandora to Regulus

“Probably shouldn't be doing it but we’re definitely going to continue anyway” - Remus, Sirius, James and Peter in sync.

very confused Peter: “leprechauns don't play quidditch.”

Marlene: “like weewoo but not weewoo” exasperated and high off her ass

Sirius: “I like aids”

phone falls off bed Marlene in an Australian accent: "crikey my phone"

“I’m hooked up to so many wires i could connect to hbo on my heart monitor” - Lily on pain killers to James

"I don't think I can lick that, can I?" -Sirius playing goat simulator

watching cloudy with a chance of meatballs and it's at the part where the mayor destroys the machine and James says " I hope you see the error of your ways, you glutton!”

(talking about Cameron Monaghan) the murder child from my chemical romance - Sirius

"Fuckin’ Sirius"- Remus while asleep

Sirius "I've got middle fingers and i'm not afraid to use them" Regulus: "do it" Sirius "I’m a little afraid to use them"

Peter while asleep: groans and sits up fast James: "you okay?" Peter "not really." James: "What's wrong?" Peter: "I'm gonna have to use the loo to solve the thing."

Sirius: "So were you born in 2006, 2007?" Narcissa: "i was born in 2004" Regulus: "i don't mean this in a mean way but wow you are old"

Sirius: "I WANNA HOLD YOU" Remus "NO, LET ME MAKE COFFEE THEN YOU CAN"

Barty: "I'm gonna do a line off your dresser"

Barty: "i have a headache" pauses "and i have 2 more lines to do"

Mary: "I don't have to do acid I have the that back massager that messes with my balance receptor"

Barty: suddenly sits up Regulus: “are you okay” Barty: “i don't know, i'm just gonna go to sleep and try to see what's going on”

Barty: "Why not use a shotgun, it's easier, this is america." (was not in america)

"stop licking the oreos" - Reg @ Barty

"Do i really have to tell you not to mate with the cat"- McGonagall @ the marauders

Remus: “I can feel the brain damage,, and i've got another line”

“MY TRAUMA CAN'T HANDLE THIS!”- Sirius

“Ball licky licky titty croissant” - James trying to learn french from Regulus

“Ooo yay i love being kidnapped!”- Barty probably at some point

“The 3 c's cook, clean, cocktails”- Remus “The 3 b's bake broil blowjobs”- Sirius

“LET ME UPLOAD MY PORN DAMNIT” - Marlene probably

"Dorcas you should be my sugar mommy" - Pandora

"An air whore" Remus

"My skyrim character is Schizophrenic" - James

"I wanna blow up pumpkins, and People!!!!" -Bellatrix

"I can taste it in my eyeballs" - James

"you can't take terrorists to the airport"-Peter

"I'm really bad at swallowing" - Sirius

“you can't fuck a duck, you'd have to seduce it” - Evan

"Hey your boobs are crooked"- Marlene

"i’m sorry, i accused you of taking my grandpa" -Sirius

"im a gay virgin"-Regulus

"duck now motherfucker" Sirius @ James

"i wanna become a rug or everyone does a line of my ashes when i die" - Remus

"you can't be funny while I'm smoking" -Remus @ First year after he walked out the door

"I'm leaving, i don't care that much about being drug free" - Barty

[zahri-melitor]

Carrie Kelley, in 1986, was the first Robin to have an iconic weapon (her slingshot).

Tim Drake, in 1991, was the first main-line Robin to have his own distinct weapon (his bo staff, though he ALSO started out with a slingshot as a secondary).

Dick Grayson got his escrima sticks as Nightwing in mumblety 1995-1997. The first ART you could say they appear in is Nightwing vol 1 #2 (his first page in the Blue Fingerstripes outfit).

They are drawn in at least once more in the miniseries, in #4, but Dick never draws them or acknowledges them.

The first time he holds them is the cover of Nightwing Vol 2 #1: however they don’t appear inside.

As far as I can tell the first time Dick FINALLY uses his new weapons is #5. Lady Vic gets the honour of being the first rogue smacked around with them.

What’s the point of tracking all this down and establishing the 18 month long process of Dick actually USING his new weapons?

Well, mostly because I just read Oracle Year One again, and just gonna put it out there, but Richard Dragon gave Barbara Gordon escrima sticks and lessons to defend herself in Batman Chronicles #5 in June 1996, several months before we ever see Dick drawn holding his.

Yeah yeah later Year One stories like Robin and Nightwing Year Ones will flirt with the escrima coming earlier for Dick, but the fact that in our timeline the development of Babs and Dick both using escrima sticks in their fighting styles occurred in an overlapping period is fascinating to me.

Of all the weapons to pick for them both. Dick, after returning to work in and near Gotham, picks up the fighting style that Babs acquired to allow her to fight in her wheelchair.

[steelycunt]

heyy! if you're still doing the word game then i also got some words for you (also suuuper excited for the pride au): kiss (<33), yell, cry, home and sing.

hii bab thank you!! love these choices..🥣

kiss...sawry you know i cant give you a proper kiss yet but:

Sirius wraps his free arm around James’ head and smacks a kiss onto his cheek, and knows, with that, he is forgiven.

yell:

James’ abrupt yell of warning came too late to stop Neville accidentally treading on his glasses, which were set on the floor by his pillow; it had, however, struck perfectly to startle the little boy into frightened tears, and James has been racked with guilt the entire walk here.

cry (ing):

Sirius is sunk down low into the sofa, with James and some Babycham in a fancy flute that’s cut to look like crystal; there’s a damp spot on James’ crewneck jumper, from Neville crying into his shoulder come his bedtime at the news of their leaving tomorrow morning.

home:

Mary helps Hestia drag her drunk husband home, one of his arms slung around each of their shoulders; James blows Sirius three loud, smacking kisses before he and Lily turn the corner to Frank’s house.

sing:

George McCrae sings take me in your arms, rock your baby! and in an alcove framed by silver streamers, Sirius winds his arms around Remus’ waist.

send me a word + if its in the wip i'll give you the sentence!

[loop-hole-319]

What mythical horse centaurs I think the batfamily would be.

Bruce - Thestral / Batpony

Ties in well to witnessing his parents death. I think he will be able to control his invisibility although if you have scene death you will be able to see through it regardless.

Dick - Peryton

Specifically that one image of the one with the peacock tail. I just think it fits his flamboyant personality and is so colorful. It would also be dishonorable to give him something that couldn't fly.

Jason - Nightmare

I like to think it was a normal centaur but then something bad happened transforming him into a nightmare. I have a vivid image of him entering a building while wearing a smirk with a giant gun on his shoulder. With every step he takes embers fly from his feathering and a magma like texture spreads from his glowing hooves.

Tim - Kirin/Quilin

His appearance would be similar to the ones in My Little pony. With a horn that looks similar to an antler and a set of sharp fangs from dragon-like traits. With a dark red coat and gold scales with a gold horn and highlights. Also keep the setting itself on fire when pissed off cuz it's funny and opens up a whole bunch of scenarios for him.

Damian - Shadhavarr

Combined with constantly being mistaken for a unicorn with the fact that his horn seems to serve no other purpose then as a noise maker has put a damper on his mental health. After all, a wind instrument being stuck to your head is not beneficial to an assassin. He was supposed to have wings, he was supposed to be a Thestral. Although he did inherit his father's black coat and fluffy ears.

He does eventually find love for music in this AU mirroring his love for drawing.

Cass - Thestral / Batpony

Not much to say for her other than aesthetics and that would look badass. Although she is much more fluffy than Bruce.

Steph - Unicorn

Her highly pigmented shiny purple coat and yellow mane almost make up for the fact she can't use magic.

Babs - Hippocampus

Being a Ichthyocentaur on land would be a lot more upsetting if her tail was paralyzed because some asshole The Joker purposefully ran her over with their boat.

Duke - Descendant of Skinfaxi

Despite lacking a horn Duke has the most magic out of everyone in the herd. He can do basic light manipulation and his coat is extremely reflective.

Alfred - A White horse

The one death rode in on.

Jason likes to keep Dicks antler sheds so they can play fight with them later in the year.

Duke and Jason form a glow-in-the-dark club.

Jason likes to piss off Tim to make him flame up. Damian secretly thinks the flames are pretty.

Dick likes to make feather jewelry with his feathers.

Despite being partially paralyzed, Babs is extremely mobile in her wheelchair although she cannot swim.

Steph paints everyone's hooves she needs help with her back feet.

Despite three family members having wings, they rarely use them. Dick uses them the most by giving himself extra air time with jumps.

Despite being an extremely lanky awkward foal, Jason is a Shire. His running has been described as thunderous.

Jason once kicked a man's head off

When Bart met Tim he got extremely excited over 'horsey' and jumped on his back. Tim immediately bucked him off.

Tim kicked Kon in the nuts (thank you invulnerability) once on reflex because he smacked him on the ass. Kon later defended himself by telling him that he lived on a farm and he gave the horses butt pats all the time and it was ingrained.

Jason likes to play Rodeo with his friends. No one has stayed on for more than 4 seconds.

Once out of the assassin Colt Damien takes a deep dive into music and learns like seven instruments.

[nicklesbam]

could you write bottom!sam x g!p reader smut please?

I can definitely try, sorry it took so long and I'm sorry in advance if it's bad

Y/n had been at work all day stressing over paperwork. Her leg was bouncing and all she could think about was getting home to her girlfriend, how beautiful she looks without even trying. All she wanted to do was bend her over and fuck her until she only knows her name

As soon as it hits 7 on the clock y/n is rushing out of there. She got in her car and zoomed all the way home. Y/n practically ran up the stairs to their apartment and opened the door. Sam turned to her girlfriend and smiled

"Hey bab-" y/n cut her off with a kiss. The kiss was heated and primary

As soon as they came up for air y/n started leaving open mouth kisses on Sam's neck. Sam's hands flew to y/n's hair

Y/n let her hands roam around Sam's figure from her hips, to her legs, and finally her ass. Sam leaned her head to the side and sighed in content

Y/n turned Sam around and bent her over the kitchen counter. kissing all the way down her legs, y/n practically ripped Sam's shorts off and her panties along with it

"You have no idea how much I missed you today" y/n spoke lowly. Sam let out an airy laugh

"I think I have an idea" y/n chuckled. Y/n dove right in and ate her like it was her last meal. Y/n was already painfully hard but Sam's moans were filling her ears and making it painful not to fuck her hard right then and there. Y/n couldn't take it anymore

"Fuck I'm not waiting for that damn bed, I'm taking you right here, right now" y/n smacked Sam's ass and stood up quickly. Sam turned around and kissed y/n while she was quickly getting her clothes out of the way

Finally y/n freed herself from her underwear, her dick smacking against her lower abdomen. Sam turned back and looked at it with hunger

"You're thirsty aren't you? My dirty little whore" y/n walked closer to Sam, getting so close their lips brush against each other

"On. Your. Knees." Sam immediately complies. Y/n coo's at her while brushing strands of hair out of Sam's face

Sam lays her tongue flat on the slit making y/n hiss in enjoyment. Y/n grabs Sam's hair into a ponytail

Sam suddenly takes in all she could, almost reaching y/n's pelvis

"Oh fuck! Thats it baby, take that fucking cock in your mouth" y/n was trying so hard told hold back from throat fucking her girlfriend. Y/n could hear Sam gagging on her cock and almost came from the sound

Y/n pulled Sam off of her and brought her to her feet. She bent Sam over the counter again, this time lining up her tip

"Fuck I've missed you so much today," y/n spoke as she lathered her cock in Sam's wet folds, "my coworkers were so fucking annoying" suddenly y/n plunged herself inside Sam. Sam tried to cover her moans with her hands while y/n was in pure bliss

"First Susie clocks in late." Y/n started taking her frustrations out on Sam. As y/n started speeding up, going harder Sam couldn't focus on what y/n was saying

"Can you fuckin' believe that?!" Y/n asked practically destroying Sam's pussy

"Oh fuck. Look at you all cock drunk. Nothing in that pretty little head is there?" Y/n could practically see her drooling

"Fuuuuck I love seeing you like this" y/n grabbed Sam's hair, pulling her backwards to her chest. Y/n started marking Sam's neck

"Harder" Sam could barely mutter the word. Y/n smirked at her girlfriend below her

"What was that baby?" Y/n teased

"Please, please harder" she basically begged. Y/n slowed her pace a bit and started going hard and deep

With each thrust Sam fell forward with a broken moan. Y/n let her head fall back in pleasure as she reached around, putting pressure on Sam's clit. Y/n could feel Sam tightening around her

"You about to cum? Yeah?" Sam started shaking her head fast as she could

"Cum. Cum on my cock, I know you want to" y/n whispered in Sam's ear. The intimacy of the moment made Sam fall over the edge. Y/n grunted in pleasure when she felt Sam's walls basically sucking her more inside. Sam's eyes were squeezed shut as y/n let her ride it out. Once Sam came down from her high y/n pulled out

"On your knees please baby" Sam gladly obeyed. Once on her knees she looked y/n right in the eyes with a fucked out look. Y/n came fast shooting hot ropes on Sam's face. Sam licked the cum around her mouth snd swallowed it

Y/n ran to the bathroom to grab two rags for both her and Sam. She cleaned Sam up first then worked on herself

"We should put on our clothes before the others get here" Sam spoke as she grabbed her clothes

"Too late!" Quinn shouted from her room. Sam's face went red while y/n couldn't stop laughing