#Source: Superstore

[incorrectpeterparker]

Peter: Mr. Stark, can I ask you something and you don’t freak out?

Tony: No.

[incorrectquotesfromthelighthouse]

Rook: Why don't we all tell something about ourselves? Lucanis: Sometimes when I'm playing the Sims, I give myself a happy family. Everyone: Neve: Maker's breath.

[incorrect-bridgerton-family]

Cressida: I know we’ve always had this unspoken rivalry-

Penelope: It’s not a rivalry, you’re just always mean to me.

Penelope: And it’s not unspoken, you talk about it all the time.

[baneofmyextence]

Leona: People call anything “mental health problems” these days.

Leona: Like, sometimes I’ll spend a weekend lying in bed because I no longer find pleasure in things I used to enjoy.

Leona: Does that make me depressed?

Ruggie: Yes.

Jack: Almost certainly.

[westannatasharomanoff]

Bucky: *angrily runs over to the table while Natasha, Clint, and Tony are eating lunch* You won’t BELIEVE what I just read in the paper!

Clint: What? What happened?!

Bucky: Apparently, Natasha’s pregnant! With MY boyfriend’s baby!

Natasha: What?! What the hell?!

Bucky: Yeah, it’s all over the news! Captain America and Black Widow are having a baby! This is why nobody tells you things, TONY! *runs off*

Natasha: What the hell have you guys been telling Tony?!

[shyjusticewarrior]

Leslie: Have you had anything to drink today?

Bruce: Uh, just three mugs of juice.

Leslie: I think you'll be fine.

Bruce: Okay.

Bruce: ... No, I lied. It was seven mugs. I just didn't want you to judge me.

Leslie: That's too much juice, Bruce.

[angelofthenight]

Vance: We're not leaving this room till we figure out this whole will they, won't they, Kermit and Miss Piggy thing we got going on.

You: Wait, sorry, am I Kermit or…

Vance: Yeah, 'cause you're smart with skinny legs and I'm Miss Piggy because I'm a star.

[wildlyincorrect]

Glinda: We’re not leaving this room until we figure out this whole will they-won’t they, Kermit and Miss Piggy thing we got going on.

Elphaba: Wait, sorry, am I Kermit, or…

Glinda: Yeah, because you’re smart with skinny legs, and I’m Miss Piggy because I’m a star.

[outlastrabbit]

Coyle: The second this trial ends, we’re going to my room, we’re getting in my bed, and we’re not leaving til we figure out this whole ‘Will they, won’t they?’ Kermit-Miss Piggy thing we got going on.

You: Wait, sorry. Am I Kermit, or…?

Coyle: Yeah, ‘cause you’re smart with skinny legs, and I’m Miss Piggy because I’m a star.

[i-only-see-daylight]

Manon: Elide, your husband, Lorcan, is a loser, Aelin and I both agree.

Elide: You do?

Aelin: No, uh-uh, I never called him a loser!

Manon: Sorry, I’m the one who called him a loser. Manon: Aelin called him a clown.

[incorrectstarwarsquotess]

Anakin, on his communication device: Come on, what would you do if you were me?

Obi-Wan: If I was you, I would’ve killed myself years ago.

Anakin:

Anakin, tearing up: *voice cracking* Why do you even bother calling-

[incorrectquotesfromthelighthouse]

Lucanis: People call anything “mental health problems” these days.

Lucanis: Like, sometimes I’ll spend a weekend lying in bed because I no longer find pleasure in things I used to enjoy. Does that make me depressed?

Bellara: Yes.

Rook: Almost certainly.

[incorrect-losers]

Stan: What do we do if the tornado hits us?

Eddie: Uh, what do we do if a tornado hits us? I’m not sure, maybe, GET BLOWN AWAY BY IT

Mike: Nono you hide under a doorway

Bill: No no no that’s an earthquake

Ben: Actually, they say you’re not supposed to do that anymore

Bev: Who cares what they say not to do for something that’s not happening

Bill: They say that you should go towards the eye of the storm

Eddie: Where’s the eye of the storm, Bill?

Bill: …I don’t know

Eddie: That’s what I thought

Richie: Tell someone you trust!

Bill: No, Richie, that’s only if the tornado’s molesting you

[baneofmyextence]

Riddle: Wait, so- so you told them that you spent money that you didn’t actually spend.

Azul: Mm-hmm

Riddle: Then you.. took the money and hid them in a safe under your desk.

Azul: Yep.

Riddle: Isn’t that.. embezzlement?

Azul: No, embezzlement is when you stick jewels on your dorm uniform.

Riddle: I think you mean bedazzling.

Vil: Which is also a crime.

[incorrectghostbustersquotes1984]

Egon, holding a crying Oscar at arms length: Hey, listen to me. You’re out of control, okay?

Egon: You’re a baby. Your life is not that hard.

(Oscar cries louder)

Egon: YOU’RE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF!!!

[waterfire1848]

Charlie: We all love each other. We’re like a family. [ Lucifer and Alastor are trying to kill each other. ] Charlie: Excuse me, I have to go stop the love.