#depersonalization disorder

[fractalsuggestions]

this is a little self-indulgent but i love colors and designs, so...

here's my take on a DPDR (depersonalization-derealization disorder) flag

here are the stripes, top to bottom:

blue- community & overcoming isolation

green- grounding & recovery

yellow- depersonalization

white- general feeling of disconnect, with a white square in the center for a feeling of "something missing"

light blue- derealization

gray- general dissociation/combined depersonalization+derealization

black- loss of time/emotion/opportunities

there's sort of 3 sections of the flag: the center represents symptoms of the disorder itself, the bottom represents the negative outcomes of those symptoms, and the top represents recovery and connection and understanding among people who share this disorder

there's already an existing DPDR flag, but I really wanted to make one that included stripe meanings. the existing one mostly just has colors taken from the cloudgender flag, which as a neurogender related to DPDR is certainly relevant, but i wanted to make one that wasn't derivative of that seeing as not every person with DPDR is cloudgender (for example, me)

the original DPDR flag is perfectly fine! as I said this is a bit of a self-indulgent thing and i honestly thought of this design before checking if there was an existing flag. link to the original flag will be posted in a reblog!

[pornogrindprincess]

I disassociate when I’m depressed.. I disassociate when I’m happy.. what’s the point?

[wormworker]

Chronic dissociation / DPDR & having to keep lists of foods & drinks you like or dislike because you don't feel anything while consuming them.

[goodbye-randoms]

TW: suicidal thoughts, disorders.

storytime of today,

So me & my friend both have a disorder called depersonalization/derealization disorder. Today we hung out & everything was going fine. We went to the store & when we came back she had a depersonalization attack. I never dealt with someone ELSE having one before so i got scared. I was dealing with it the best I could, asking questions, carring her cos she couldn't walk & was scared to, helping her name her feelings, etc. She was scared to do anything. She was also scared of me & felt better w/ me? I understood how she felt but din't know how to deal with someone else having it. I knew she couldn't walk home so i called her dad. He came a few minutes ago from work. But in the mean time she said she hates herself, she's ugly, everyone hates her, her mom doesn't love her she wants to kill herself, etc. Then her dad came, I told her to call me if anything & to be safe. I'm rlly worried & praying 4 her.

WHAT ARE THE DISORDERS?:

[repthy]

DPDR

I don’t have hope like I did in the beginning. It’s getting scarier and I don’t know how to get out of it. Old methods aren’t effective like they were before. Sure they weren’t 100% effective but I managed. Ever since my bf left I’ve been isolated and I feel completely disconnected and alone, even around family.

If anybody knows what I’m going through and can reply to this , please do. I need to know I’m not alone I need to know there’s hope.

[butterfly-encyclopedia]

I feel like for so long I've just been a ghost. Existing and floating through life. Never fully feeling really real. Never fully knowing who I am. I don't remember when it started, I don't remember how else to feel. All I know if how I am and how I view the world. All I know is it's exhausting. Existing and never feeling sure. Talking with people I think I love, but not knowing how love feels. Talking to people who say they love me, when I do not exist to be loved. Again, they say they love me. But who am I? For what is there to love about a husk... I do not know who I am. Sometimes though I get a spark. This spark either takes my mind away, or makes me feel even more in the dark. Sometimes I feel unidentity? Feeling like I'm someone else. Though even when I feel like them, I still feel nothingness. All I want is to feel real. All I want is out of hell. All I want is someone who can understand, And tell me it's not my fault. And maybe worst of, is that I see no hope. Things never getting better, clearer, realer, easier to cope with and though So I will just keep existing, never feeling enough or whole.

[turiyatitta]

Enlighten Up! w/ Special Guest, Stephanie Mercury (Ep 14)

Welcome to Episode 14 of Enlighten Up! Join our dynamic hosts, Spiritual Teacher Morgan O. Smith and Comedian Nathan Griffith, as they engage with Stephanie Mercury, a gifted visual artist and natural energy healer. Join the fun as Morgan and Stephanie gently tease Nathan about his claims of university education, particularly his apparent lack of knowledge on the Four Noble Truths, despite his…

[vixensofdeath]

the urge to die and become nothing becomes stronger every day

[ladycatashtrophe]

"Wow, you're so self-aware! It takes most people years of therapy and dedication to get to that point." Thanks, I constantly feel completely disconnected from my physical being and the material sensation of my body, brain, and spirit/soul is so overwhelming that I often have to see myself as an objective third-party instead of an integrated entity. Father son holy spirit and all that.

[bl0w-m3]

[multiplicity-positivity]

(Image ID:) a blue, green, and white graphic titled “Depersonalization versus Derealization: Exploring the differences in two dissociative symptoms” organized in two columns. The left hand column is titled “Depersonalization” with a stock icon of a head with a scribbled like for the brain. The right hand column is titled “Derealization” with a stock icon of a broken heart.

The statements in the “Depersonalization” column read: “I have trouble recognizing myself, including my reflection and aspects of my identity,” “I feel as though I don’t exist, like I’m invisible, or like someone besides me is controlling my body,” “I feel disconnected from thoughts, memories, and actions, and have a weak sense of identity,” and “I feel numb physically and emotionally when recalling my own past or painful events.”

The statements in the “Derealization” column read: “I have trouble recognizing my surroundings and environment,” “I feel as though the world around me doesn’t exist, including places and people I interact with daily,” “I feel disconnected from reality and struggle to determine what’s real and what isn’t,” and “I feel numb to the world around me, and daily life seems foggy, unreal, and fake.”

Below these columns is the word “sources:” with the following links:

https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/dissociative-disorders/

https://www.isst-d.org/public-resources-home/fact-sheet-iv-what-are-the-dissociative-disorders/

https://www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-and-derealization-whats-the-difference/

(END ID)

This infographic was made by us, Halberd (@dreamlandsystem). Feel free to save and share as much as you’d like. Program used: Canva. Image credits: Pixabay. This infographic explores our personal experiences with DPDR, with additional sources for further reading.

[wormworker]

I have no idea what I think critically about "Synecdoche, New York", but I would caution anyone with DPDR (Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder), DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder), or any other dissociation disorder, that watching this movie caused a very extreme dissociative episode for me.

[sage-hazeline]

how do you reconnect to life after being disconnected for so long

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

A small selection of photos from the POC and Mental Illness Photo Project by Dior Vargas.

[chaos-in-one]

Some symptoms of our dissociative disorder we experience we don't see talked about much:

- Having trouble telling apart fiction and reality because most of the time, reality doesn't feel real

- Not always being able to see other people around me as real

- Not being able to believe something really happened months or even years after the fact

- Never feeling like I can trust myself, especially my own memories

- Being terrified because of sudden negative emotions or panic over a trigger I don't understand and didn't know existed

- The sheer terror of watching my own body move against my will and not being able to stop it, being forced to just sit there and watch my own body do things I didn't choose

- Never feeling like I have full control over my own life and future (but feeling like I need to control it to an almost obsessive degree)

- Feeling like my entire life has been taken away from me because of how much of my memory is gone

- Never being able to see my own body, or even my own mind and thoughts as really mine

- Almost never being able to keep a schedule together because I never know when my symptoms are going to get worse and make it harder to function

- Never feeling like I know who I am no matter how much I analyze every part of myself

- Being constantly terrified that any second I could have hours, days, even months or years ripped away from me from dissociation and memory loss

- Never being able to be sure I didn't do something, even if it sounds like something I would never do

[skinnyr4t]