#two chaotic cats with magic

[crystalkitty1220]

I am taking that pattern idea and we are going to make a fucking tabaxi character then, make the funny cat thingy because, fluff. -Wolfe

Y'KNOW WE USED TO HAVE AN AU IDEA IN MIND WHERE FELIX WERE ALSO SUPERNATURAL AND HAD ICE RELATED POWERS

COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT -Fe

Ayo I thought it was weird that I think of ice whenever I think of Felix but thank you for letting me know it's not. Great minds think alike and all that.

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Fucking hell Nightbringer really gave me everything huh god

Henry 1.0 origin story

Cerberus origin story

Satan's cat thing origin story

"Goldie in Freezer" origin story

Levi's Ruri-chan obsession origin story

Mammon being scared of ghosts/horror origin story

More in depth version of Solomon & Asmo's first meeting/pact origin story

A painful reason for why Asmo's room looks like that

What the tsl characters would have been like irl (the absolute worst wtf simeon)

Mammon's issues finally discussed in depth

Mammon being extremely ride or die for Lucifer

Almost instant Mammon & MC friendship

Mammon being just so amazed by MC and also insanely supportive of them

Mammon being willing to do anything for his brothers, being more sure of himself, almost instantly following Lucifer's orders and making the others do so as well

Levi's issues discussed in depth.

Levi straight up saying he was depressed and still is

Levi's friendship with MC!

Levi & Lucifer's relationship!!!!!

Levi being shy and scared and just so 😖

Things being bad in the Celestial Realm even before they left

Asmo's issues being discussed in depth

Asmo very explicitly having body dysmorphia

The brothers being much more supportive and loving of each other

Lucifer being visibly scared of losing another family member and being insanely overprotective because of it

The brothers being slowly overtaken by their sins (something that was always a part of them but also something they could control as angels) and losing control of themselves

The brothers gaining new magic

Satan being a fucking mess

Satan not really fitting in and all of them being really awkward around him

Satan's issues being discussed in depth

Belphie's issues being discussed in depth

Belphie expressing passive suicidal ideation

Belphie talking about how he needs someone to blame for what happened to Lilith so he can process it/make sense of it even if that someone is himself

Lucifer's issues being touched on from from different perspectives/angles

Diavolo's issues being hinted at

Simeon's issues being vaguely discussed

More about Lilith! (remember my post about how lilith definitely wasn't a sweet little angel because there's no way the universe would let lucifer catch a break? I was right!!! She was as much a little shit as the rest of her family!)

More about the demon king! (He wanted to stop the war too🥺 also a whole line of previous demon kings!)

More about god/how angels work (all angels are brothers & sisters but not technically family the way lucifer & his siblings are!)

ADAM!?!?!?!?!?

Solomon & MC's Sorcerer & Apprentice relationship seen in full detail!

MC being absolutely amazing

MC being competent and powerful and dangerous and resourceful and confident and the brothers realising all that but them also being funny and snarky and chaotic and outgoing and homesick and caring

References to present (s1-s4) brothers (& how they'll tear solomon apart if he doesn't bring MC back)

NIGHTBRINGER!? BARBATOS!!!??? but past barbatos doesn't seem to know anything about MC and present barbatos is helping solomon bring MC back....so who...?

References to Noble demons and conservative demons and devildom politics

Angel - Demon prejudice /racism from both sides explicitly shown

The brothers being war criminals and how the devildom sheltering them nearly re-started the war between the two realms

None of them being able to identify MC as a human (it takes Diavolo a long time + Lucifer straight up denies it when MC tells him), Adam & Nightbringer saying MC has the "power of angels", MC's favourite manga being one where the youngest child out of 7 is described as being angelic (*cough*lilith*cough*), Diavolo, even after knowing MC is a human, going "what are you"..... me softly chanting: nephilim!mc nephilim!mc nephilim!mc

The lessons flow better? It doesn't feel like one arc is squished into two lessons and then you must immediately jump into another different arc. It feels like it's all just happening in a connected sequence?

Better pacing in my opinion. It doesn't feel rushed.... like the part where satan discovers cats and then later is seen still sitting next to the cat and watching it? It feels appropriately spaced out

MC's relationships with everyone doesn't feel isolated. Like earlier there'd be a lesson or two dedicated to one character and we won't see much of the other characters during it. Now it feels like everyone is there interacting with everything in a normal, natural way. Yes there are lessons dedicated to getting to know one brother but the others are there, interacting with each other and MC during that time as well

The emotions & relationships are discussed/written in a way that feels very real and believable that it becomes actually really moving (s1-s4 also did this well but in nightbringer because of arcs/scenes/relationships not being isolated, of things flowing better and having a better pacing, of them outright discussing their issues it has a greater impact - yes I cried more than once shut up)

In the end, Nighbringer is darker than og OM! but not in the "grrr gonna kill you" way. It's "darker" because they address more serious topics in depth

[flamingpudding]

I'm so sorry I didn't get to finish but as Dan's Teekl is a Phoenix snake and he takes after Vlad since of dressing

When something big is going on the magical world and they need King Phantom's help he decides to bring along his children this is how the Justice League finds out just like Robin is a past dumb title so is Klarion all the Justice League deal with a bunch of hyper up chaotic children who have been antiheroes let's find out

I wanted this to be just like a we are robbing thing except with Clarion all of them showing off the fact that Teekl have never been a cat would be so funny to me

Anywho I haven't been able to come up with anymore ideas for Dan is Klarion but I did come out with this one hope you find it funny sorry that I messed up on the first part of the writing

Okay... so version one got deleted, per my rant post notices... so here is version two hopes to that it will still be as good... also... i didn't remember how I ended this the first time soooooo yea... sorry again for having messed up in between...

[Link to the first part of the Ask here!]

I hope this will still be as enjoyable....

------------------

Vlad didn't regret a lot of things but he regretted having told Bruce Wayne that he had a way of summoning the Ghost King. Why you ask? Because Bruce Wayne apparently leaked that information to the Justice League.

Well originally Vlad had told Bruce only about this because he was after the deal he had wanted for years with Wayne Enterprise. That man had been able to avoid Vlad for years now, and during his years when he hadn't been a redeemed man it had infuriated him.

But he was a redeemed man now. He had reformed his entire Company and since Wayne Enterprise was contracted with the Justice League, he had felt it was appropriate to boost that his Company had valuable connections too.

He also just wanted to rub it into Brucie Waynes face that he wasn't the only one with big name Hero / other worldly connections department. Okay it might have been a bit of an ego thing left. But he was a redeemed man.

And because he was a redeemed man he had not used his ghost powers to throw Batman out of the window the hero had used to barge into his hotel room at 3 -goddamn- AM only to demand the method on how to summon the ghost king.

No sir, Vlad was a redeemed man, he was nice now, a good guy.

He only grumbled and demanded the reason, which apparently was a demonic thread to the magical world that indirectly could wipe out the entire world itself. Great, little badger will not be amused hearing about that.

Daniel would be cross with him for using the summoning stone in the middle of the night but Batman was giving him a valid reason to use it. Surely Daniel would understand right? Plus Vlad could use that as change to see the little badger again. It had been a while since he last saw him.

Well Vlad regretted agreeing with Batman with the condition that he would be the one to do the summoning. That man in a bat suit did not hesitate to drag Vlad with him then bringing him, blindfolded mind you, to a place where he then was faced with several heroes, including but not limited to the Justice league.

Just great.

At least Vlad got to inform Danial about the situation and the reason for his summon as Ghost King via summoning stone, even if that blond British man had scoffed when he saw Vlad pulling it out, about the situation and what the little badger could expect the moment he stepped out of a portal.

What Vlad did not expect were several RED portals opening and similarly dressed young adults as well as one teen stepping out of them.

"Sup old man! Mom told us you called him about some world ending problem!" Dan greeted him in his Klarion get up, perfectly styled hair and his ghost pet, a phoenix snake, Snape (yes Dan named his pet after a mage from a wizard movie series) on his shoulders. Vlad could feel the distinctive illusion magic around the pet and he was pretty sure everyone without ghost powers were not able to see through it.

"KLARION?!" One of the present heroes yelled.

And of course all of the kids had to answer in reflect turning to where the voice came from at the same time.

"Yea"

There was a brief moment of silence in which Vlad face palmed.

"Ah sorry, that was on reflex. Old habits die hard!" Ellie laughed, she had grown into a young woman and was currently wearing what looked like a black suit crossed with a 90s style witch dress.

"I am the current Klarion, lose that fucking habit already." Dan grumbled annoyed as he crossed his arms glaring at every sibling that had answered to his alias.

"I am telling mom you cussed." Ellie instead grinned instead, before she looked around for a moment before her eyes landed on Nightwing, her face instantly lighting up. "ROBIN! I mean Nightwing! I haven't seen you in ages!"

"Do I know you?" Vlad could feel sorry for the hero, but these where the phantom kids, so he wasn't in the slightest and he was still cross with he heroes for waking him up at 3AM!

"I am hurt! Don't you recognise me!" Ellie gasped and Dan unashamedly elbowed her for acting so familiar.

"Misrule." He warned her. Ellies current Anti-Hero -Chaos Agent- Alias Vlad remembered. A name she specifically chose because it sounded like Miss Rule and she knew that the word play would annoy Nabu. That girl had some serious beef with the Ancient of Order.

"Oh shush little brother! Let me reconnect with the kids I used to mess with!" She shushed Dan ruffling his hair and nearly messing up his horned hairstyle, before turning back to Nightwing. "Don't you remember my lovely Armadillos? Though I only know you were the Robin I first meet because I looked into Grandpa Clock's time mirrors..."

There was a brief moment of silence on the other side where the heroes stood and Vlad swore he could have heard a pin needle drop.

"Oh god..." One of them finally spoke up as apparently some kind of realisation sunk into the heroes. But before Ellie could add anything more the one Vlad recognised as Red Robin cut in.

"Klarion is like Robin!"

"RR what are you...?"

"The title of Klarion got passed down like Robin!"

There was another brief moment of silence before Dan, Ellie and the rest of their siblings burst out laughing.

"It took you idiots this long to see that?!" Dan called them out, laughing as he hugged Snape.

Vlad would probably feel sorry for the entirety of the heroes before him if he wasn't amused by this himself, even he had seen the differences whenever 'Klarion' got passed on.

"For your information, I was the first Klarion, so i could mess with Nabu." Ellie grinned. "I was also the one that used a bit to much eyeliner."

"I never got the the horned hairstyle right."

"I was the one with a fancy black suit."

One by one the phantom kids listed of all the differences in their versions of Klarion until they all looked towards the youngest Dan, the current Klarion.

"What?" He grumbled as his elder siblings grinned at him.

"Fucking fine. I use a suit similar to the old man's style and I like to do more than just mess with Nabitch." He muttered after enduring his siblings stares for.

"And you cuss." Ellie grinned brightly causing the rest of the siblings to to chuckle.

Vlad recognised the look in Dan's eyes and before the kids could break out into an argument or a brawl, depending how violent Dan was feeling, he coughed loudly to get noticed by everyone.

"World threatening situation." He reminded everyone. "Where is your mother? The Ghost King?"

"Oh Mom is already dealing with the situation." Dan shrugged. "We more or less came to watch and see the heroes suck and fail at 'Order' to rub it into Nabitch's face."

Vlad really wanted to scowl the kids and he was going to but then the heroes cut in again.

"Can we get back to the thing about Klarion being a title passed down like Robin? With how many different Klarions did we have to deal with over the years!?"

"Red Robin not the right time..."

"Yes the right time! So many comments from Klarion make sense now! Like the first time he went right up into my face!"

"Red Robin!"

"Oh that was still me! The first Klarion!"

[chisatowo]

Also, I think I'm gonna switch Marley from being 14 to being 12, partially because I have too many 14 yr old ocs, and secondly because I just think I've been envisioning them as younger since I started incorporating them into Mocha and Risa's story

[sinofthesloth]

Ｄｉｆｆｅｒｅｎｔ　Ａｎｉｍａｌｓ，　Ｄｉｆｆｅｒｅｎｔ　Ｂｏｙｓ

SYNOPSIS: How do the House Wardens deal with their significant others odd pets?

♥ sfw, gn! reader, quick story, all house wardens ( almost forget Vil originally ) ♥

Riddle - Ferret

"Will it be like treating the hedgehogs?" Try to compare the treatment of a ferret to how he and the dorm care for the hedgehogs on campus.

Since you are the ferret's owner, he will expect you to know how to take care of him, but Riddle will look things up to make sure he, and you, are doing it properly. also look forward to him looming over your shoulder to see how to do whatever it is you are doing for its care.

"The internet says they smell. Why do you have an animal that smells?"

Refuses to let anyone near your pet if you leave him in charge of him for a little bit. He is worried Ace or Deuce will do something stupid and hurt the poor animal.

Will let the ferret run around in his dorm room while he watches it. He will also study as the baby sits in his lap napping as does so.

You brought the ferret dressed up to an un-birthday party, and he is now a required guest. Riddle will also buy him different outfits so he fits the theme.

Leona - House cat

Will take naps together, but will throw a fit if the cat gets there first. The cat will also throw a fit if Leona gets there first. Most of the time you have to separate the two by placing one of them into a different sunspot.

Has and will continue to take photos of the cat and place text of it. It's his way of getting revenge when he is the one that is being dragged into another sunspot.

All three of you will lay together when the two of them actually behave. Leona on the bottom, the cat on top, and you sandwiched in between the two of them.

They both do get zoomies at the same time of the night. Leona will get up to grab a snack or start death scrolling on tiktok or just walk the halls of the dorm. The cat knows every time he gets up and will follow Leona up and down those halls. Leona won't say anything, but he enjoys the quiet company.

If you have to leave the cat in the dorms while you deal with Ace and Deuce's bullshit, he will kidnap the cat. That's how he knows for a fact that you will come visit him.

Grim hates sharing the dorm with a non-magical cat and will help Leona steal him.

Azul - Rabbit

Does not enjoy how chaotic this thing is and tries to make you leave both of them at the dorms. You refuse to leave them alone with Grim for a night, so when he wants a sleepover, it's you and the boys.

Tires to make the twins take care of them when he wants to spend time with you without having to worry about them chewing things up in his room.

Has bought your boys toy and equipment in hopes that they will calm down by running off the energy they have. Also will buy them treats, but will not tell you since he doesn't want you to know he likes them. Sometimes. He just wants to make sure they like him.

Extremely surprised how long their tails truly are. Will look things up just to see if they're true with your bunnies.

When you are arguing, he will pick them up and hold them both in front of his chest and say, "Really? In front of our sons?" Just to make you embarrassed by the implications. It almost never works, but seeing him hold them so close to himself is adorable and will comment about making another one with him.

Will end up with both of them on his chest/stomach by the end of the night while you use his shoulder as a pillow.

Kalim - Snake

He was interested in the snake but was worried it was venimus and Jamil refused to let him anywhere near it.

If the snake is out of the cage, Kalim is somewhere watching, wanting to play with it. If you let him, make sure Jamil is busy. You don't want him on your ass.

Finds it cute when they bury themselves in the sand within their containment.

He will buy the snake a larger Tank and even allows you to bring it with you when you come over to spend the night.

Loves putting little hats on your snake and seeing them stand. Finds it adorable when the baby girl crawls into your textbooks to make you take a break

Refuses to be in the room during feeding time for the snake. He will wait outside with the door closed. He will ask you to make sure she has fully digested her meal before coming back inside the room

Vil - rat

when you told him you owned a rat, he laughed an told you it was impolite to call whatever you had as a rat. "I'm sure she looks beautiful." "She is beautiful. A beautiful rat."

Rook lost it at Vil's face once he saw the animal was a literal rat. "I was thinking you meant like a.. ratty dog. or something. I didn't expect a uh actual rat." "I told you she was a rat." He was very surprised to say the least.

Tries to be supportive since he knows rats are actually clean animals, but just the thought of something with thumbs running up his arms makes his skin crawl.

Will not hold her if his skin has the chance to touch her. Will wear gloves with a long sleeve turtleneck. If you dress up the rat, it will be better since it won't be direct skin to skin contact.

Will watch her eat since he thinks it's cute to watch her hands cup the meal. Just make sure you have hand sanitizer at the ready.

He will also smile and laugh watching you fight her over your food if she is out of the cage while you snack. Once he gets used to seeing her and being around her more often, he might just surprise himself by grabbing her once he sees that you are losing to a literal rat. "Never thought I'd see a rat beat my sweet potato, but they do eat anything."

Idia - Mop dog

Trips over him constantly

you know the white dog in Ariel? Same dog.

Found it hilarious when the dog followed you into the janitors closet and sat in the mop bucket.

Started dying with laughter when the dog started whining that you didn't push him around in the bucket.

The dog napped a lot at his feed while he games.

You joking put a tray on his head with one of Idia's gamer's drink, and pointed to Idia, and the dog brought it to him. You did make him give him a treat for helping.

Malleus - Bearded dragon

Definitely thought it was going to be much bigger.

Also tried to speak to them in his native tongue to find out that it does understand.

He refuses to keep him in the cage. "There is no need for my future son to be held captive in a glass cage, Y/N."

Makes him multiple little paper outfits.

Made him try on wings and he almost refused to let Malleus or you remove them.

"Look Y/N! He is smiling at me! He loves me."

[ratskinsuit]

*Thows this into the pit I keep you all in*

Here gremlins, food, specifically Adam flavored

This was made for my very best friends birthday, that was on march 2nd @chaoticcornchip, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL <3

(I’ve never written for Adam before so expect shittyness, and she let me do this)

Boyfriend headcanons: + Random ones

He definitely confessed first, because he’s Adam

Idk what sort of dark magic you did to get him to fall for you

Or have him STAY committed, that’s an achievement

When you two first started dating, you kind of just assumed that he would keep it hidden

No.

He is FLAUNTING you all around heaven.

“THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND BITCHES. AND YOU FUCKING DICK SUCKERS COULD NEVER PULL SOMEONE LIKE THISSS”

Doesn’t let you go anywere near hell (whether your a demon or not) he doesn’t trust it

Honestly very scared of losing you

(He has abandonment issues because I say so)

Is terrified if you leaving him just like his other two wives did

Clingy

He will just randomly call you at like 3am because he’s overthinking and he’s lonely

His love language is your time spent together

Whether it’s him ranting about his day to you or just a movie and cuddles

Also expect lots of gifts, you will be spoiled

If he’s busy one day and isn’t there to spend time with you, expect to find something like a necklace on your dresser

He is very good with animals because I SAY SO

You say you like dog? Here’s a wolf

You like cats? Panther or lion?

You two have to go on ATLEAST one dinner date a week

Also takes you to nice ass places

Kinda shitty table manners but he tries his best for you

Random but I like to think he’s terrified of clowns

So if you are like some sort of jester!Reader/Clown!Reader he would be so conflicted (might write that but idk)

No circus dates

Mimes also freak him out, he thinks they are going against nature and he will scream if one comes near one

Since he tends to work a lot, to make up for it he always makes time for you

Or if his schedule is really packed he will surprise you with your favorite flowers and food/candy on your dresser when you wake up

Honestly even though he seems like someone who would forget your anniversary or your birthday

No. He does not

He goes all out of them, remembers the place, time and date

Seems like a shitty lover, is honestly not and cares about you sm

He just has a hard time expressing it

Since you two are dating you probably hang out with lute a lot (y’all can have Adam I want lute 😩)

You better hope she likes you because she is very judgy of adams girlfriends because she doesn’t want his heart to get broken

But when she sees how happy you make him, and how well you treat and care for him she warms up to you

His phone background is a picture of you

NSFW HEADCANONS: MDNI

Isn’t lying when he says he has a big dick, not THE biggest ever but pretty good

7 1/2 inches, pretty good

Okay, high ass sex drive

Literally constantly in a state of horny, it’s his default setting

Willing to do it anywhere, anytime, everywhere

You hav to physically PRY him off of you sometimes (not in a noncon way ofc)

Can probably go like 2 rounds, sometimes 3 but then starts getting tired

He’s honestly up for anything except for things like scat, piss, Vore, noncon ect-

Is fine with threesomes but prefers doing it with you alone

Up for pegging, you two just have to have a lot of trust in your relationship

Knock him down a few pegs bestie

And put them up his ass

Very clingy after

Aftercare consists of the two of you cuddling and eventually going to sleep

Will leave the cleaning up for later, he just wants to hold you in his arms for now

LOVES phone sex/sexting because of how busy he is

Has a folder full of photos of you (if you send them to him)

Really into Public sex

As said before, ANYWHERE EVERYWHERE

He’s a whore

Has tried to fuck you in a Photo Booth before

Whether you let him or not us your choice

This is all I got I haven’t written him yet I’m so sorry

———————————————————————

Have this chaotic mess. I also have like 23 requests to do, IM WORKING ON THEM I PROMISE, I’ve got a Vox one in my drafts rn I gotta finish. Anyways, happy birthday @chaoticcornchip! :D hope you enjoyed!

[lowkeyrobin]

MCYT with an S/O who fosters kittens? :D

OH MY LORD YESYESYESHDNSKDNDN I had sm inspo w this bc I have 5 cats (cats are one of my favorite things ever I swear) and yeah dkkdkd THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST

MCYT ; you foster kittens

includes ; tommyinnit, tubbo, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, quackity, foolish gamers, karl jacobs, & slimecicle

warnings ; language, talk of harm towards animals

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

genuinely feels so bad when you have to let the cats go

like he tears up nearly every fucking time

he watches some of these poor cats go from aggressive and distant, barely able to eat because they don't trust you yet, to warm, loving and cuddley little creatures

he literally watches them grow and he gets so emotional cause like why can't you keep all of them???

he'll be off to the side when you're handing them away to a new home wiping his tears

he's more emotional about it than you

he gifts you like new cat food bowls and cat towers and stuff once they get all beaten to a pulp

if you're fostering more than like three at a time, he'll have a gang of them on his lap while he's editing, recording, or lounging around

his hands are always covered in scratches and scars because he'll fuck around and find out even after you warn him about them being feisty at first

"this one got ran over by a car and he's blind now"

"can we keep him?? :("

TUBBO

"Oh fuckin christ- y/n! the children are invading!"

they're always running in and opening the doors with their lil hands when he's streaming LMFAO

he loves that you foster cats, the fact you take time out of your life for these precious little animals that just need a chance at a better life is so heartwarming to him

if he's not streaming or sleeping, he's spending time with those chaotic fuckers

he and freddie make an orange cat that you fostered -who was deaf- become a dj

he didn't know the cat was deaf until you asked what he was doing

"I mean, for a deaf man, he's making some bangers!"

"yeah, this cat knows how to party, y/n, come join us"

he can never be around when the cats have to leave though, he just sits there with a pout because he gets too attached to them

yall got a whole room dedicated to the foster cats, don't worry, they're spoiled as all hell

RANBOO

like tubbo, it warms his heart to see you care so much about the poor babies that just need a little help readjusting and understanding that not all people are bad/you're there to help them

absolutely loves when you bring back like little feisty babies that barely know how to walk but know how to hiss

they can't help but laugh like "awe oh my god, this is so sad but it's so cute"

when I tell you all those cats are so spoiled by them

it's sweet though, he really cares about all the cats you take in too, you honestly foster them together at this point

you guys end up keeping this tuxedo cat with one eye and name it Jellyfish (as per chats vote)

the amount of fanart of you two with jellyfish 💔💔💔 so cute

jellyfish becomes the mom of all the new fosters and looks over them and shit, that way they ease into the new environment a little better

buys all the fosters outfits. there's a barbie sized closet for all the clothes

FREDDIE BADLINU

it's like there's a new cat every week considering he brings back street cats as well LMAO

these mf cats are SO SPOILED but they deserve it

he gets so attached to the disabled ones because he loves having to help them out

he loves teaching them how to eat from his hands too

it's so funny, like they'll nick his fingers and he'll be like "fuck, that tickles, Mr. Peanut!"

gets so emotional when you have to give them to better homes

like hugs and kisses them goodbye 4 times

he genuinely thinks your magic, watches those cats go from shy and trying to stay away from you to like being attached to you by the hip and all wagging their tails

he's constantly running around the house playing with them too

he loves seeing them pop up on 2 legs like meerkats when he's serving them wet food or treats LMAO

NIKI NIHACHU

she couldn't care less that the house is loaded with cat stuff and a whole room is filled with cat towers, shelves and toys for them

loves making new little puzzles/mazes for the cats with the shelves, making a little competition to see who can get to the top fastest

she names the cats because she's gonna get attached either way, but after a while they become more and more silly

like they go from Sebastian and Pixel to Tater Tot and Simon From Alvin And The Chipmunks so quickly

she learns how to make homemade cat treats as well

she also, like ranboo, gets a little barbie closet and fills it with cat outfits

some cats like the outfits and others don't, but the ones who do, good god it's like britney manson on the runway

absolute ws in that house, photoshoots for days

QUACKITY

"AH WHAT THE FUCK? Y/n! come get Jessie and Walter, they've invaded my stream!"

he genuinely names most the foster cats characters from meme shows/movies/memes in general

actually named one Badass Grandmas Meme ; also named another Hurricane Tortilla after that one vine

always taking .5s of the cats once they've accepted that he exists as well

sometimes they hop on his desk and join the stream

"Oh, look! it's Goldfish, she's the newest foster that y/n took in"

constantly taking pictures of you and the fosters throughout the stages of rehabilitation

from hissing and scratching to cuddling on the couch and lazy naps

no cat leaves without a little pair of sunglasses

he's genuinely inspired to make quackity cat merch because most of the fosters you take in LOVE clothes LMAO

FOOLISH GAMERS

literally treats these mfs as babies

you'll walk in and see him holding one of the elderly cats you're rehabiliting from a bad home whom just got rescued and he's holding this poor girl like a literal infant

she loves it though, most the cats do

the fosters love playing with his hair too, and he plays into it, always bends down to their level and wobbles his hair around for them to smack around and try to chew on

he has such a soft spot for them

if you're having one of those rare moments where you might give up on a cat, he's right there to try and help you

flea baths on kittens are always done by him, he feels so bad for each of them, meanwhile you're on cat-drying duty and giving them a lil medication to kill any remaining fleas

he's 50/50 on names at first but gives up with trying to not name them bc he gets attached anyways

"Oh, lookit! this is Evergreen, she's been chilling with us for like, 3 months I think"

he loves when they interrupt his streams bc they're so cute and explorative and curious LMAO

KARL JACOBS

he's always snuggling with them and letting them climb all over him

let's them play with his hair/dangly earrings he's wearing all the time

uses his hoodie strings to play with them too

also teaches them how to eat from his hands

he giggles with a "Oh my God, that tickles!'

he gives them all human names

the litters usually look like Tom, Sally, Joe, Micheal, Cameron, and Mellissa

loves giving them clothes too

genuinely releases a little merch line of cat clothing considering he's got a mini closet full of cat clothes for the fosters, why not share the little cuteness

he's a cat whisperer istg

CHARLIE SLIMECICLE

he's the most supportive of you fostering cats like ever

loves fucking around with them and sliding them around on the floor, if there's any long hair cats, he loops very loose bows and clips around their fur and shit

cradles them like babies to sleep

and then slips them into the cat tower or on the couch/bed etc

even covers them with a little blanket

"Oh shit, they've invaded, they're raiding! the axe weilding brothers are here!"

gives them the most dumbass names like Microwave Popcorn and Toaster Strudle

he frames pictures of every cat in the hallway once they leave

[riddles-fiddles]

Can we have a cat? Part 1

Synopsis: you ask your boyfriend if you two can raise a baby kitten together. Characters: all the housewardens Tags: fluff, silly scenario to warm the heart Notes: gender neutral reader, slight long post

•·.·''·.·•ˏˋ°•*•·.·''·.·•ˏˋ°•*•·.·''·.·•ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Says no immediately after your "can we-" without hesitation;

Is extremely annoyed by your request to take a pet; he's not the best to tend for himself, imagine taking care of a dependable being? By some magical coincidence, the following day you come to Savanaclaw to spend time with Leona, you're met by a fluffy, round and very noisy ball of red hair and twitching ears - Cheka. Taken aback by the unexpected sight, you let the door to Leona's room behind you close with an unattended thud, pulling the cub's attention from his annoyed uncle to you. "Ohhh! Unca's friend came to play too!" with a hearty squeal, the small boy finally easens his grasp around Leona's arm, eliciting a relieved huff from the older lion who seemed to sink more into the bedsheets, trying to disappear. "y/n, come and play house with us!" Your eyes drift around your boyfriend's room, noticing how chaotic and messy it looked - even more worrysome than the usual: clothes nested around some wooded animal dolls, coloring books scattered over the carpet... and a make-believe tent roughly made from a big blanket and two chairs complemented the setting. While you watched the surroundings with amused surprise, Leona finally noticed your presence, limiting his body to simply lift his head from the pillow with a sly smirk slowly musing his lips. "Weren't you asking for a baby kitten some days ago? Well, congrats, you just got the chance to take care of one. Have fun." With a sarcastic chuckle, he rolls over, officially passing over the responisbility of taking care of Cheka to you.

Surprised by your request; when he asked what'd you want for your birthday, he expected for jewels, new clothes or chocolate.

Is a bit reluctant at the idea, since he has absolutely zero experience with landdwelling company animals.

Azul is prideful of the amount of knowledge he has obtained along his devoted years of land studies, but never inclined himself to extend his knowledge so deep into human animal husbandry. He knew it was common to farm animals and some species were privileged enough to live graciously amongside humans, but the intrinsicability of how to care for them was something foreign. And yet, you made it clear that the only thing you desired for your birthday was a kitten. Determined to fulfill the wish of his beloved, Azul ate piles of books and educational veterinary videos on how to properly raise a healthy cat for days on end, even furthering his - scarce - knowledge about different breeds of felines. The octo-mer knew that raising an animal would demand harsh responsibilities and time to dedicate, which could collide with his management of Mostro Lounge, so he chose to search for a more independent breed. When your birthday finally arrived, Azul made sure to give you to a long day of princess treatment - he drove you to all the places you wanted to see, obliging to your wishes, and when the night befell Octavinelle's dorm, he reserved the Lounge exclusively to you two, a romantic dinner by candles and soft music playing on the background, simply enjoying each other's company and talk. "-And now, allow me to bestow my beloved with my most sincere and humble gift," with a dramatic clear of his throat, Azul disappears by the lounge's heavy curtains, only to return with a basket decorated with bows and a cyan blanket covering the mysterious content inside. "Happy birthday, my precious pearl." As he lifts the blanket, the small figure of a siamese kitten lifts its head, greeting you with a quiet, tender meow.

Excited as hell!!!!

Always wanted to get a pet after leaving his home, but Jamil wouldn't let him.

When you first requested Kalim about a kitten, boy's eyes went wide and sparkling, body fuming with joy. "Of course my love! What kind of cat would you like?" He would ask you excitedly, gently grasping your hands on his, a smile so large it looked painful. "Oh, wait, I know, I know!" Filling the air with playful laughter, Kalim pulls you to his treasure room, bringing down a tapestry with intricate drawings woven all over it, depiciting a very inviting oasis with a girl with important looks laying over a big, imposing feline. "The princess from the Scalding Sands was always followed by a tiger. Maybe we could adopt a cub together! He could grow strong and happy with all the room to run around!" Kalim radiated so much, it would be a sin to tell him that owning a tiger is absolutely unreal, but then there goes Jamil, ready to slam some world-shattering rationality, turning his bright smile into a frustrated pout. Some days after, though, you're certain to get a delightful surprise from Kalim! During one of your Oasis dates, the Asim boy brings you to a beautiful corner of the shared paradise between you two, laughing all the way while carefully leading you through the tricky sand, his hands gently covering your eyes. "Hold on a little longer my love... and... now you can see my surprise!" Finally, he dramatically reveals his loving gift: a baby bengal kitten. Not really a tiger, as you two had envisioned, but equally as stunning.

Fervently refuses it

Vil dislikes seeing you sad, but he can't simply be talked into adopting a kitten. Too much hair, it will ruin his perfect clothes.

"Mon moitié..." he sighs, cautious with his tone. His voice above a whisper as he gently caresses your palm. "I understand the desire to care for a cute, vulnerable being, but it wouldn't work." Despite all your efforts to try and charm Vil into your idea of taking mutual care of a kitten, the man was harder to convince than you expected, showing how determined he was on keeping his looks always the living definition of perfection. Although stubborn on his decision against it, he proved to be patient enough to endure your contant bickering. You passionately tried to show him the bright side of owning a kitten; health benefities, dozens of magazines talking about how animals makes you look even more attractive, but nothing was nothing to ring his bell, only eliciting exhausted sighs and repetitive 'no's from him. Eventually, you decided to take matters into your own hands. As usual, Vil came over to Ramshackle Dorm during the weekend for a sleepover and skincare session date. It wasn't until he was about to settle down on bed to snuggle by your side that he felt something fluffy and squishy, quickly moving away from him that he noticed something off. "Mon amour, is that...?" he asks, a slight anxious tone on his voice as Vil slowly lifted the warm blankets, eyes widening by the sudden vision of big yellow eyes staring back into the shadows. "So, you decided to go against my desire to not adopt a cat, uh?" He lets out a defeated sigh, pose slumping off for a moment before his gaze locking onto your pleading eyes. A quiet chuckle falls off his lips, amused by your adorable antics. "Fine, I guess it couldn't be that bad..."

Just like Kalim, he's over the ceiling with the idea!

Idia loves cats, and now he won't need to charm Grim or Lucius into his lap anymore! "Y-you're serious about it?! We can finally have a kitten of our own?!" Poor boy can hardly contain his joy; eyes half lidded and smile large, baring all of his shiny, sharp teeth. With a spring in his feet, slightly rocking, he wastes no time from pulling his tablet up, quickly searching for adoption centers as million of result windows popped right in front of you two. "Which kind would you like? I've been looking forward for a kitty just like Lucius TBH..." He mumbles to himself all the while, his pale face finally drawing some rosy colour to his cheeks as the boy made sure to schedule a million adoption appointments. Though you needed to do all the social business of talking to the volunteers and staff responsible for the kittens, it was already a true demonstration of how much the shy boy was excited for the occasion by the way he followed through with you with every step of the process, and when you two were finally granted access to the cells, you watched with gleeful delight the way Idia finally let loose, rolling around the could floor with a horde of kittens in his gentle embrace. "This is the happiest super event of my life! If this is a dream, please don't wake me up", he babbled between breathless giggles, cradling a bunch of kittens close, before pulling you along a careful, half hug. "I get to adopt a kitty and spend time with you..." In the end of the day, you two exited the adoption center with not only one, but a full litter of kittens on your arms. After all, how could you deny the lively sparkle on your boyfriend's eyes?

Secretly excited about it; he always wanted pets, but was denied by his strict mother

He needs to stop and think about his duties as housewarden, though.

The idea of adopting a kitten stings something within his heart - a fluterring, warm feeling washing over his being as Riddle contemplates the sincere joy of tending over a dependable, beautiful and frail being like a kitty. What wondrous delight would it be to care for it and see it grow every day. "That sounds mos pleasing, my rose," he mumbles, the ghost of a smirk tugging at his lips. However, the vision merely lasts a second, before his frowning features once again graces the moment. "But I'll have to put some thought on that matter first." As much as Riddle longs for the idea of cultivating something beautiful like a life by your side, he needs to consider a lot of things - a kitten can be feisty and curious, too much for its own good. The ruler of roses would not tolerate any kind of disarray, although he learned to be less harsh on the matter. He was also worried regarding the animals that lived within the Garden of Roses; the kitten could mistake the dormouse for a toy or even try to eat it, and Riddle couldn't bear the thought of the flower bushes turning into total messes. He would dwell on the final decision for days, trying to find a way to keep both parties happy and satisfied - worry not though, as all he needs to make his mind is for you to bring the kitten over and show him just how much well behaved it can be, always keeping an eye out for any mischievous intent of climbing over the roses, of course. While alone, you could even delight on the way Riddle would dress your kitten with special clothing. "Since he is basically a member of Heartslabyul, I thought it would be the most appropriate to dress him with our dorm uniform."

Surprised and excited by your request

Since he's basically still learning about humans intrinsicities, the idea of experiencing the pleasure of taking care of an animal amused him

"Oh, a little kitten, you say?", he mused almost immediately after the exposing of your wish, a compliant grin gracing his features. "And what stirs that sudden desire, child of man?" Malleus learned to admire and revel on the few occasions where he was privileged to spend time between animals, as most of them seemed to fear his imposing nature - and maybe that was the biggest reason he grew anxious by the days, playing the encounter with the kitten on his head over and over. Like Azul, he spends his free time learning more about felines - all the things about their diet, behaviour, health issues... he wants to be useful while helping you take care of the baby, while also avoiding bigger mistakes. The fae prince makes his excitement clear even with his usual face and mannerism, always telling you little facts he learned while studying or asking you something about cats that really piqued his interest. When you two would lie down and talk until falling asleep, Malleus would suggest a line of names for your kitty, or then hear your suggestions intently, sometimes cooing in agreement. When the day to meet your beloved furbaby finally came, Malleus was overjoyed, but a little hesitant still. The prince took the small feline carefully into his hands, fearing it would break from the slightest brush of fingers, only to gasp in wondrous surprise by the way the tiny animal curled up against his chest, seekin his warmth and safety. "I see you're an exquisite one, little kitten. I'm absolutely smitten with your frail figure." You watched in awe as Malleus gaze softened with a tenderness much similar to the one he reserves to you, the glimmer on his eyes a silent promise regarding the kitten.

[protagonistpolling]

DRAMA IS HAPPENING IN THIS COURTROOM

Why should you vote for these characters?

Why should you vote for Phoenix Wright? (3)

"Cross examined a parrot, ate a glass necklace containing poison, seemingly immune to death in any form, just an all-around chaotic force of nature dear god"

"He is so so silly. He ate a glass bottle that contained traces of poison (and was fine) on purpose. Look at any of his college days "feenie" sprites (with the pink sweater). He adopted a kid at 26. He was punched into unconsciousness by an 8 year old. He's kind he's annoying he's a bitch. He still uses a Nokia phone, held together by tape. He wears a pendant with his daughters picture in it. Said daughter is a magician who's also a human lie detector. He's bisexual. He's transgender. He fell off a burning bridge. He has it all"

Why should you vote for Layton and Luke? (1)

"You say there's a tournament with all the 'good guys'? How strange. Actually, that reminds me of a puzzle..." *throws a box of matches at your face* *because more than two matchsticks were moved, you lost the puzzle*

Why should you vote for Miles Edgeworth? (1)

because this anon was nice to me

Why should you vote for Apollo Justice? (3)

"he’s transgender and spikes his hair up with gel every morning and accidentally has an incredibly rare male calico cat."

"Hes SO DESPERATE to prove himself. And SO LOUD. He WILL get u acquitted of criminal charges but also have an anxiety attack while court is in session."

!!!!!!!!!!!SPOILERS FOR APOLLO!!!!!!!! "I'm sure plenty of people have submitted Phoenix so I'm putting a word in for Apollo. I saw someone describe him as someone who has invented the "Most Normal Guy" award and is trying his best to win it, and that description is very accurate. He has a magic lie detector bracelet. He shouts a lot to train his "chords of steel". Everyone thinks he's a teenager when he's actually 22. He punched Phoenix Wright in the face once. The detective on most of his cases throws her snacks at him. His best friend is a 15 year old who is actually his sister but neither of them know this. He has at least three backstories that don't TECHNICALLY contradict each other but you can tell they were all made up on the spot. After his three backstories he decided to become a lawyer for some reason. And despite it all, he's STILL the most normal person in the entire series. Nobody is doing it like him."

[soft-girl-musings]

Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps - CHAPTER 5 (Something's Gotta Give)

Noir!Jake Lockley x WOC Lounge Singer!Reader

written in collaboration with + header by @mrs-lockley

chapter 1 chapter 2 chapter 3 chapter 4

cross-posted to ao3

tags: late 1940s Noir AU, Reader is WOC coded but with no physical description besides being slightly taller than Jake while wearing heels, no use of Y/N, brief mention of past injury, spanish translation at end (courtesy of @queerponcho, thank you beloved)

wc: 3.4k

fic summary: Of all the gin joints in all the world, Jake Lockley walks into yours. Unfortunately for him, it's not quite the start of a beautiful friendship.

chapter summary: immovable object? the unstoppable force would like a word.

__________

As far as peace offerings go, it’s not the worst.

At least, that’s what you’ve told yourself as you stand outside your neighbor’s apartment, your fist failing to close the distance and knock. In one hand you hold a plate of pastries you’d bought earlier. Hopefully it’s enough.

Before you can raise your hand again, the door whips open. 

Leah Mendoza, ever the force to be reckoned with, stands with arms akimbo and eyebrow raised. “Quit shuffling your feet and come inside, nena.”

You oblige wordlessly. Crossing the threshold, you immediately feel the warmth of her apartment embrace you. Not that she’s escaped the chill that plagues your building; Leah is an artist, and every flat surface serves as either canvas or easel. Most spaces are covered in surreal portraits and near-magical icons, her handiwork displayed as a gorgeously chaotic gallery. Sunlight streams through gauzy curtains to feed sprawling plants and attempts to warm the richly colored rug beneath your feet.

You leave your shoes at the door and hold out the platter, smiling sheepishly. “Hope you still have a sweet tooth.”

“It's been so long, I'm surprised you remember.” Despite her playfully icy tone, Leah’s expression warms as she peeks at the pan de mallorca you hand over.

“...But I suppose going five blocks out of your way for breakfast makes up for it.” She nudges you with her hip before escorting  you to the kitchen.

“Look what the cat dragged in, Caro,” Leah calls out to the seating area as she pours two mugs of coffee. You see your other friend’s smiling eyes light up at the sight of you.

“Ohhh, it’s been ages!” she squeals as she rushes to your side, tackling you with an enthusiastic hug.

Caroline Ngo, the youngest of your trio, has always brought a much-needed energy to your time together. When she and her parents moved in, you and Leah decided to adopt her into your early morning ritual of coffee and gossip. As her rosy cheeks beam up at you, you’re (a bit selfishly) grateful that she’s delayed her college applications by a year. You’re not ready to part with your other baby bird just yet.

Still, you pry yourself from her grasp. “Something tells me you had an early start on the coffee.”

“Maybe,” she drawls as she saunters away. Leah passes you a steaming mug, prepared just the way you like it.

The three of you sit, sipping and smiling as the room grows brighter with the sunrise. Leah regales you with the results of her latest art show; Caroline badgers you for updates about Mauricio, dimpled cheeks flushed as she speaks. For a few moments, everything feels like it used to.

Leah finishes her pastry and turns to you. “So, ‘Ms. Songbird’. How are you?”

You shrug, dismissive. “Oh, you know. The usual.”

“No, I don’t know. You haven't been around for us to see your ‘usual’.” Leah's voice is measured, but she’s clearly frustrated. “Can you tell me the last time we've heard more than a ‘good morning’ from you? Or were together for longer than an elevator ride to our floor?”

You chuckle nervously. “Goodness, maybe… August? September?”

“June.” She sips her coffee before setting it down. “Are things really so busy at work that you can't spare a moment for us anymore?”

If only you knew.

“I'm sorry, ladies. Truly. But things have been picking up at the lounge, I've even had to get outside help–”

“Ah yes, the altar boy lawyer.” Leah shakes her head. “I thought you were done with him.”

“‘Done with him?’ Leah, he's my friend.”

“Oh, I recall. So good a friend that he lets you ice his bruises and clean his cuts.” She crosses her arms. “So good, he's even bringing new friends with the same scrapes to your door.”

“The other night was an emergency–”

“How long are you going to run around with that kind of crowd?” Her voice bites. “Believe me, I know my share of the nightlife. But every time you bring home some broken man, a load of trouble seems to follow.”

This is not where you saw the morning going. “I thought we were spending time together, not berating the company I keep.”

“Please don't be upset,” Caroline pleads, taking your hand from her seat on the floor. “We miss you. You haven’t been home in weeks,” she laments. “At least, not for more than a couple of hours.”

You shift in your seat but give her hand a light squeeze. “I've missed you, too.”

“Then do something about it.” Leah gets up, crossing the room to distract herself with more coffee but then doubles back to look you in the eyes.

“You know my gut is never wrong, nena. And I wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't speak my mind.”

You brace yourself as she continues. “You can spend your nights hiding behind your Songbird persona and running the lounge, but don't be surprised if the cage you're building around yourself is locked from the inside.”

With that, she turns on her heel and heads back to the kitchen, leaving you and Caroline in silence.

Slowly, Caroline slides into Leah’s empty seat, her hand still on yours.

“... I always liked your stage name.”

You don’t say anything, instead letting your eyes trail through the patterns on the rug.

She scoots closer. “Leah’s just looking out for you. Like always.”

“I know, Caro.”

You feel her head rest on your shoulder. Tough love has always been Leah’s strong suit; as hard as you are on your boys, it’s bush league compared to your friend.

Caroline’s next words are low, whispered just loud enough for you to hear. “I know that man you were helping.”

You look down at her, dumbfounded. “Really? You know Jake?”

She sits up, eyes wide again. “Well, not technically. I never learned his name. But when he was leaving your apartment, I recognized his face.” Her small smile grows as she speaks. “There were days I’d stay out late after school, and I’d catch a ride from him sometimes. He’s really kind, not like some of the other cab drivers.”

Concern suddenly sweeps across her face. “Is he going to be alright?”

You think back to the morning he left your apartment: his bruises, your stitches, the blood that still stained his coat…

His hand on your hand, your face…

You don’t feel your fingers grazing the apple of your cheek until you hear Caroline giggle. Your hand drops to your lap as your face warms. “He’ll be fine. If he wised up and saw a real doctor, that is.” You shrug, reaching for your coffee.

“You care about him,” she teases.

“Oh, come off it,” you huff, nudging her leg with yours.

“And he obviously cares about you!” She squeals, lowering her voice when Leah turns her head toward the noise. “I saw him leave your apartment, but he stood there for ages, staring at your door.” Her grip on your hand grows unbearably tight. “What happened that night?”

You’ve been asking yourself the same question from the moment he left you standing in a bloodstained gown, your apartment colder without him. Since then, there hasn’t been a moment where you’ve been free from the memory of his face.

“I did him a favor. And… he may have done one for me, too.”

__________

Jake Lockley is man enough to admit when he’s been beaten.

In this case, he's absolutely won over. Head-over-heels, and at your mercy.

Maybe years from now, society adopts stricter rules for how soon you should call on a lady. Even today, some would advise against showing your hand too early. Some men wouldn’t want to seem too eager, too desperate.

But Jake Lockley is not a liar.

If “desperate” is the word for the incessant drumming in his chest each time you come to mind; if it’s what has him cutting corners and driving recklessly, ushering customers along at double the pace so his thoughts can return to you; if it’s why his palms sweat and nerves ache at the memory of your face that night, that morning… then Jake Lockley is desperate.

It’s hardly been a day and a half since he left your apartment, cold and injured. The suit stitched him back together in seconds; the only ache that remained was at the thought of you. You, who scooped him off the pavement and took pity on him. Who stained your hands with his blood to make it stop. You, who set his skin on fire with the smallest touch and had him convinced he would burn with or without it.

Screw the three day rule. He has to see you.

Hot under the collar, Jake now sits at the bar– your bar, long before normal business hours. Next to him is Matt, whose face hasn’t untwisted from the wry grin he’s had from the moment they met up.

“It’s like a jackhammer,” he chuckles into his glass, dodging Jake’s backhand swing.

“Can it, Murdock.” Jake’s hand returns to his own drink. Downing the rest, he raises his glass to the bartender. “Top me off, Mr. Manalo.”

Teddy obliges with shaking hands. He scoops up the bills Jake slides his way before dashing off. The two men had asked for privacy, and he’s determined to stay in their good graces.

Jake knocks back the new drink, swiping the excess from his lip as Matt’s laughter grows louder.

“You really need to calm down.”

“That’s what this was for,” Jake retorts, shaking his glass so the ice clinks against the edge. It’s doing him little good, though; from the moment he snuck in here that stormy night, he knew The Paper Moon as an extension of you. Even with the house lights up and nobody onstage, the lounge makes his heart race as quickly as if you were right beside him.

Matt claps a hand on his shoulder. “You’ll be alright, you’ve been through worse.”

“Yeah,” Jake snorts. Matt’s quiet for a suspicious amount of time. “What’s on your mind, Murdock?”

“What’s on yours?” Telltale concern creeps into his voice. “How are things up there lately?”

Jake smirks, the expression not reaching his eyes. “Oh, you know. Loud… and quiet, in all the wrong ways.”

“Seems quieter than before.”

“Yeah?” Jake cocks an eyebrow. His mind doesn’t feel quieter, not the way it should. Khonshu’s been on his ass more often, doubling down when his thoughts dare to drift to anything besides the mission at hand. The god throwing a tantrum has become one of the few guarantees that remain.

“I mean it,” Matt reassures him. “It’s like night and day from when you returned stateside.” 

Jake stirs the ice in his glass, tempted to hop the counter and refill it himself. It takes everything in him to repress the memory of “before,” to not think of the bloody business in El-Alamein. To forget when the occupancy of his mind dropped from three to two.

“Must be the good old American soil.” His sneer drops as he considers his next words. “... or the fool of a pro bono lawyer I managed to snag.”

“Maybe,” Matt says. “Or it could be the little bird that's caught your ear.”

Before Jake can respond, a pair of footsteps cross onto the stage behind them.

He turns to see you and Mauricio, backs to the house, talking in rushed succession as you survey the stage. You’re in a blouse and trousers, your movements easy and unrehearsed despite the growing exasperation in your voice. 

“Maurie, I don't care how Leo feels the lights bounces off his new mustache wax, unless he can't follow my cues he's staying stage left. And–”

“No days off for you, are there?”

When you turn you see Jake, hat in hand and standing a few steps from the bar, as if he’d walked toward you but stopped halfway up the aisle. You can’t place the look on his face, but you're nevertheless pinned under the gaze of his now-healed eyes shining up at you.

“JAKE!” Mauricio startles you when he shouts, leaping off the stage to clasp hands with the older man.

“Hermano,” Jake chuckles, pulling him into a quick hug before letting go. “¿No te andas metiendo en problemas, eh?” 

“¿Parece que tu eres el que anda causando problemas, ey botero? ¿De dónde salió esa cicatriz?" Mauricio leans in, examining the pale line running through Jake’s eyebrow with awe.     

“Ah, just a scratch.” Jake shrugs as he brushes past him to approach the stage and offers his hand as you step down. You accept, hoping he doesn’t notice the slight tremor in your grasp.

“Leave the man alone, Maurie,” you chide, nodding your thanks and holding back a laugh. As much as Caroline fawns over you, Mauricio seems to do the same to Jake whenever their paths cross. It helps that he plays along.

As the three of you walk back to the bar, you notice Matt dial in to something and smile– far from his normal reaction. 

“I’m afraid I can’t offer you more than another drink, I have an appointment with Matthew this afternoon.” You cross over to your friend, whose smile only grows as you draw closer. But you brush it off, still focused on Jake.

“Actually,” he starts, his hand sliding into his pocket, “I was hoping to cut in on your consult time for a moment. That alright with you, doll?”

Matt clears his throat. “Mauricio, can you take me backstage? I should start unpacking this file.”

The drummer perks up. “Sure! But the band’s getting ready to play some poker… you feel like teaming up again? We can split the pot like usual.”

“Even better,” Matt grins. “Lead on.”

He gathers his portfolio and walking stick to follow. If you didn’t know better, you’d swear you could see a moment of panic flicker across Jake’s face.

It’s replaced in a flash with his usual smirk. “Sure you want to risk your pocket change, Matty?”

“If all my clients paid like you do, I'd be out of a job.” He collects himself and follows Mauricio’s footsteps, turning to Jake and mouthing “jackhammer” with a hand to his chest when he’s behind you.

Their footfalls fade and it’s just the two of you at the bar. You take a seat, drumming your fingers on the surface to soothe your nerves. Jake sits beside you.

“You look better.” You notice the scar Maurie was talking about: his former head wound is free of your haphazard stitches, instead healed into a light dash through his dark brow. “But I told you that would scar.”

He shakes his head, brushing his fingers past the spot. “I kinda like it. Gives me an edge,” he chuckles. Maybe Khonshu hadn’t healed his face the way he normally would as some sort of lesson. Joke’s on him.

“How did… I mean, you look really good, how did you recover so quickly?” Now that you’re closer, you realize there’s no sign he was hurt just two days ago. If not for his scar, you could pass that night off as some sort of dream.

“You told me to see a doctor, didn’t you? Looks like I’ve got the best one around.” 

You eye him, not sure what to think. “... yeah, alright.”

Your fingers drum the bar again. Maybe that night knocked all of Jake’s suave confidence from his head: when he’s not speaking (something you’re still not used to), he looks like a child about to lose his lunch. For all his urgency a few minutes ago, he’s taking his sweet time getting to the point.

Finally he sits up straight and takes something out of his pocket. “Here. For you, morena.”

A small black box slides toward you, stopping at your restless fingers. You raise an eyebrow quizzically, a familiar warmth spreading across your cheeks.

“A present? Didn’t take you for the ‘holly-jolly’ type.” You pick up the box, feeling its velvet casing and fighting back a smile.

“Nah, not really a Christmas guy myself. But I figured you could use a pick-me-up.” Jake crosses one arm along the bar, propping his chin in his other hand as he watches you open the box.

Inside, you see a delicate gold chain with a charm fastened to its middle: a small bird with its wings spread, intricate designs etched into its surface.

“Oh my…” You look back at Jake, who seems to have been holding his breath as you examine your gift. 

Your slowly unfolding smile is all the reward he could ask for, breathless laughter pushed from his chest with relief. “For the songbird,” he casually declares, relief mixing with pride at your reaction.

You take the necklace out and hold it to the light. “It’s beautiful,” you sigh. You undo the clasp and try to put it on yourself, but your fingers can’t seem to make it fasten.

“Allow me,” he says quickly, standing to move behind you and assist.

You feel his hands take over and drop your own in your lap. His knuckles brush the back of your neck and it takes everything in you not to shiver. The smell of smoke and spice dances on your senses, pulled away all too soon when he moves to stand in front of you.

“There,” he breathes, eyes going from the pendant draped below your collar to your eyes. “Looks perfect.”

Your fingers grasp the cool metal as you nod. “Looks perfect.” 

Silence falls again. You’ve come to hate the sound of nothing when you’re with him.

Jake’s the first to break it. He sits back down, his next words like a punch to the gut. “You know, now that I’m not driving Wesley around… I won’t have to take up space at your back table anymore.”

“Oh. No, I suppose not.” You toy with the charm around your neck. “So is this… goodbye?”

“That depends,” he says cautiously.  He turns to you, eyes swimming with the same unfamiliar mix of emotions from before. “Do you want it to be?”

Your fingers leave your neck as you meet his gaze. “Don't say you're going all soft on me, cabbie.”

“What if I was?” He leans forward, and for the first time you don't back away.

“Cards on the table: I haven't stopped thinking about you.”

That makes two of us. You bite your tongue to let him continue.

“Morena… would you ever want to get out of here? Just you and me, call it a truce or a… a date.” A smile plays on his lips before his brow creases. “I won't badger you after today, just… one way or another, put me out of my misery.”

The wings of the charm feel heavier with the weight of his confession. Hand to your heart, you feel the bird again, this time with Leah's warning running through your mind.

“I suppose a truce wouldn't hurt.”

When he smiles, wider than ever, you see the charming gap in his teeth. And you smile, too.  You both laugh, the heated stress in your nerves turning to effervescent relief.

You could spend an hour like this. But when you hear shouts of frustration and a bilingual litany of choice words echo from backstage, you know you have to go put out a different fire.

“I should make sure Matthew isn't in trouble,” you sigh, standing to straighten yourself.

“If I know Matt, he's the one causing the trouble.” Jake stands with you, desperate for this moment not to end but anxious for your next answer. “So when can we–”

“Sunday night,” you cut him off, starting to back away toward the stage. “I'll figure out how to slip away, but meet me under the sign at 9.”

You move to rush toward the stage at another outburst, but Jake's hand catches yours yet again.

“You can't keep doing that,” you groan, yet with a smile still on your lips as he tugs you back toward him.

“You're the boss,” he hums, pressing his lips to the back of your hand– the gesture all too routine, but you're ready to admit you've missed it.

He releases your hand and dons his cap, tipping it to you. You laugh again, a rich and easy sound he'd never tire of hearing. You bow slightly and dash backstage, with Jake's voice calling to you as you leave.

“See you Sunday, Songbird."

__________

“¿No te andas metiendo en problemas, eh?” - Not getting yourself into any problems, eh?

“¿Parece que tu eres el que anda causando problemas, ey botero? ¿De dónde salió esa cicatriz?" - Seems like you’re the one causing troubles, hey cabbie? Where did that scar come from?

note: in-universe Jake is Guatemalan and Mauricio is Cuban; as a non-spanish speaker, please let me know how i can improve in the future!

A/N: i've missed these two!! this chapter was a doozy but i'm so happy to have gotten back on track. i won't say PPP is on hiatus (we never had a promised release schedule) but after i take a wee break from writing, i'm set on finishing my Moon Knight Bingo prompts before 4/30 + starting on my OI fanzine entries (!!! exciting times). but if inspiration strikes before i finish, i certainly won't complain.

ty for reading!!

tag list: @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @mercurysjoy, @importantnightwerewolf, @cupidysm, @queerponcho, @nerdieforpedro, @fandxmslxt69, @shadystarlightgentlemen, @lunar-ghoulie, @casa-boiardi (lmk if you'd like to be added to/removed from this wee tag list)

[hazbinsillynight]

Radiostatic week 2024

Day 7 (free day) Jealousy

They were fighting just like always when suddenly everything changed. Neither of them saw it coming, but at least Alastor's shadow got some quality time with their old nemesis. Alastor howerver looked pretty pissed for some reason

Static mixed with strange radio sound could be heard in the principal park of Pentagram City. Everyone had fled away from the fight scene which was reducing the place to a chaotic battlefield. Some screams of panic could be heard and there was some body of careless lesser demon who wanted to have a good show. 

Vox and Alastor. The TV and the radio. The unending fight and rivalry that was tearing once again Hell apart. None of them refused to give the other any opportunity. Vox was obsessed with his rival since his departure of seven years, while Alastor only saw the other as a source of entertainment.

Vaudou and shadow magic were everywhere as well as the lightning and cables. All of this fight for a bit of teasing from the radio demon who knew Vox couldn’t resist. 

“Victory is mine this time Old man!!” Vox exclaimed with Alastor trapped between his cables.

“Ah! You wish!” Alastor claimed with the biggest smile anyone has ever seen on the smiling demon. 

Both of them loved these fights. For Vox they were an occasion to get rid of some stress and get attention from the red Overlord. While for Alastor it was a way to avoid boredom and seeing the media demon from whom he enjoyed the company so much. Their game of cat and mouse was on for what seemed forever and none of the two demons were able to say when it started.

Suddenly Vox got plunged into the ground, held and pushed by Alastor’s shadow. To the surprise of the two demons, it decided to jump on the TV demon and hold him under him against the ground.

While Vox tried to get free from the shadow’s hold, thinking it was an attack from his nemesis, Alastor looked at the situation a bit confused. He hadn’t ordered anything to his double, in fact, the shadow replica didn’t like to fight against Vox. Why he wasn’t sure but seeing it keeping his adversary to the ground somehow didn’t feel good. 

Vox tried to electrocute the shadow being over him but in vain. Instead of shooing it away from him, it got the opposite effect. The dark shape was wrapping itself around the other demon's body, preventing him from moving. Vox growled a bit as he was now incapable of moving.

“A-Alastor!!” He suddenly chirped nervously when he felt the shadow touching him and passing a part of its body under his shirt. He could feel his face burning as he looked at his rival, mortified by the situation.

That got the radio demon off guard, just like his rival he could feel his face burning. Vox was lying down on the ground with his shadow lurking over him like a predator. The dark shape didn’t form any legs and chose instead to wrap the legs and torso of the media Overlord. Vox’s shirt and top clothes were a mess that the shadow took pleasure in playing with. Alastor was mortified, just what decadent kind of behavior was that?!

The radio demon hurried to the side of the other demon, ready to shoo his shadow away. But it didn't hear it that way and as soon as Alastor came closer it hissed at him, clinging onto Vox possessively. 

“Alastor!!” Vox exclaimed when he saw the other stop in front of the protective and possessive shadow. 

A chirp from the dark shape wrapped around the TV demon surprised them both. Alastor could feel his face becoming hotter. His shadow was a powerful being of his creation, capable of tearing demons apart easily. It wasn’t some kind of goey hugging and chirping partner for Vox.

“That's enough now! I think you clearly outpassed your liberties for today!” Alastor exclaimed, trying to make his replica come back to him.

The shadow started growling before hissing louder at its master. Vox was desperately trying to get free when suddenly the shadow turned back to him and started passing his hands softly on the edges of his screen. Before neither of the two Overlords could do anything, it kissed the media demon with passion causing him to glitch stronger than ever.

Alastor saw red this time. The images of Vox being possessively kissed by his shadow replica sent him in such a wave of anger. He just wanted nothing more than to prove his replica that the other demon wasn’t theirs to take. Vox was his rival, his source of entertainment, his everything! There were no negotiations possible! So, with angry and decided steps, the radio demon came closer to Vox that his shadow took away from him while he was stuck in his thoughts.

Vox blushed heavily when he saw Alastor coming to him. The shadow suddenly let him go, smiling and clearly amused by the situation. With his heart pacing ten times faster than it should be, the media Overlord tried to stay calm. He could still feel his screen glitching and electricity waving around him.  He was voiceless. No thought was coming into his mind, the passionate kiss the shadow replica of his rival playing again and again in his head.

“A-Al...Alastor you-”

Nothing of what he tried to say made any sense. With the calm around them and their fight being over, more people and journalists came closer, impatient to hear and learn more about one of their legendary fights. Get your shit together Vox! There are cameras you can’t act like this right now! He tried to reassure himself and started to get up, putting a mask of confidence on his face.   

“I guess I’ll let you win this time, Alastor!” He smirked, knowing the cameras were on both of them.

With his clothes in such a state, their wounds, and how out of breath he was it wouldn’t be difficult to let them believe that he lost the fight. Losing was still better than what could happen if the press learned about what happened.

“Oh shut up stupid TV.” Alastor said with a bitter tone, looking angry but not at him. There was something in his way to walk towards him that made the media Overlord both nervous and thirsty. For an ace in the hole, he could be so hot sometimes. 

Before he could do anything Vox felt the other Overlord pull his shirt possessively and with a wilder behavior than his shadow replica he kissed him in front of the whole crowd of journalists. For the second time this day, Vox glitched and almost caused a blackout for the entire town.

“For anyone that wouldn’t know to whom you belong, Vox.” The deer demon whispered into his ears before biting him into the neck causing the whole crowd to gasp and Vox to reboot.

With a growl and his dear rival in his arms, Alastor growled at the journalist menacingly. A few seconds later they were alone but not before the flash of a dozen cameras, capturing the moment of intimity of the two demons. Surely Vox would have a lot of work to deal with once he woke up.

“Sleep well, my dear. It appears you’ll need all the rest you can find once you wake up.” Alastor said before gently kissing the screen of his rival and dearest demon. 

[kimbap-r0ll]

How do you think Malleus would deal with overblotting and he threatens to put his crush to sleep until they experience true loves kiss, but crush is like “You can do that?! I’ve not been sleeping much lately, so I want you too.… are you going to kiss me in a couple of months to wake me up though or am I going to have to wait for somebody else?”

Omg, you come up with the most fun scenarios. I have a thing for overblot since the designs are so cool, I wonder what Malleus would be like if he were to overblot (it’s probably going to be the end of the world then). Thank you for the ask!

Malleus is more on the yandere side for this too, and the storyline might seem a bit out-of-the-blue, but I hope you enjoy!

Overblot!Malleus x reader

No one expected the fae prince to overblot, not even Lilia. How did this all start? Everyone could only look at you as the answer.

You had arrived to Night Raven College from seemingly nowhere, and you were the only person in the school without magic. You had gotten along with Grim, Ace, and Deuce when you first arrived, and now, after being part of the chaotic school for a while, you had gotten to know a lot more people. One of them happened to be Malleus, one of the greatest magic users in Twisted Wonderland.

A few days before the overblot, you were sitting outside in the school courtyard with the usual trio, eating something you had attempted to bake and talking about how Crewel’s lab that day had been brutal.

“Y/N!!!!” a familiar voice called to you. You and your friends turned to the direction of the voice to see none other than the headmaster himself, running to you with a smile on his face.

“It seems that I have found a way back for you to go home! Aren’t I just the kindest?” he beamed, putting his hands on his hips.

“Really?!” you hadn’t felt your spirit rise as much as it had in this moment. You could finally go home, back to where your friends were, away from this confusing magic, and...

But you remembered. You had many friends here that you might never see again. Looking back at the trio only confirmed this as they gave you a weak smile.

“Hey, at least you don’t have to take Trein’s exam then,” Deuce laughed.

You walked back to Ramshackle with Grim later in the day.

“I can’t believe it, you’re actually leaving!” Grim pouted. “Just when I thought I was getting a henchman!”

“Hey at least you can be housewarden for real now,” you tried to assure him. But he looked up at you with sad eyes as you opened the door to your dorm.

“I won’t see you again, right?” Grim said in a quieter voice, his eyes seemed to droop.

You bit your lip, it was hard thinking you had gotten so close with a talking cat, but it was true. You two had been through ups and downs, all of it together, and now it was just the end.

But no one was more upset about your departure than a certain housewarden.

Sebek had learned you were leaving when you announced it during Vargas’s class. Everyone was telling you good luck and safe travels, also saying tearful goodbyes.

“It seems that the Ramshackle’s leader is leaving now,” Sebek said as he saw Malleus enter the dorm.

“Oh? Is the cat leaving?” Malleus wasn’t sure if Sebek was talking about you or Grim.

“No, y/n,” Sebek replied. “It’s a bit sad that they’re leaving, but-“

Before Sebek could finish, he heard something snap. Looking over at Malleus, he realized the fae prince had broken the phone that was in his hand.

“Ah, lord Malleus,” Sebek tried to reach for the prince but he soon disappeared.

Malleus hadn’t felt this kind of fear before. He was, afraid? The great prince was scared of something? Yes, it was the fact that someone who seemed to understand him, accept him and admire him, was leaving. You were the only person he truly felt a connection to either than Lilia, and was hoping that you would never leave, as horrible as that sounds. He had gotten attached to you after he saw you in Ramshackle as he was taking a walk. The two of you often visited quieter areas of the campus and talked together. It was as if you brightened his days, and made his heartbeat go faster.

He wasn’t going to let you go so quickly.

He ran to your dorm, only to see that the lights were off. Perhaps you were sleeping? You were likely going to have a long trip tomorrow, so you had to be inside. But as soon as he tried to open the door, a ghost showed up next to him.

“Oh, you must be the one kid walking around here often!” the ghost smiled at him.

“Where’s y/n.”

The ghost looked surprised at how dead serious the student was, and swallowed hard.

“Well, y-y/n left a while ago, apparently they’re all packed up and-“

Malleus wasn’t having this. At all. First y/n leaves without saying goodbye, and now he wasn’t invited to bid them farewell?

The stress seemed to be reaching a tipping point.

“...I see,” Malleus looked down at his hand. He was going to be alone again. Like all those centuries, he would see lives fleeting away while he remained the same. But, he couldn’t let you, there had to be a way to stop you!

All the emotions he had bottled up for you seemed to spill over as he realized how he needs to act, quickly.

“I guess I’ll just have to get you by force then.”

The whole building seemed to shake. You even stopped midway while you were climbing the stairs. You held on, wondering what was going on. Lilia, who was concerned that Malleus hadn’t returned to the dorms yet, was walking around to see if he was looking for you. Lilia was right.

The vice dorm leader stepped into what felt like a dark puddle, pieces of rubble floated in the air around him.

“What’s going on, Malleus, is that you?!” Lilia shouted over the rumbling sound that was being caused by whoever was cloaked in a dark smoke. He didn’t need an answer as one glowing emerald eye was enough for Lilia to understand.

Malleus had overblotted.

You were still holding onto the stairs, but you felt the pressure of whatever magic was going on grow stronger every second. Was something, someone approaching you? Before you could think one more time, you suddenly felt like you were being lifted from the stairs and up into the air. Something was holding you. Was it thorns?

“W-wha?!”

You thrashed around, getting cut by the sharp edges until you saw someone floating up the staircase and towards you.

“If you keep moving around like that, you’ll get hurt, human.”

“M-Malleus, Malleus what are you doing?!” you shouted at him. This was unreasonable! You looked at his face, and then his entire body. Only then did you realize he too was going overboard. Why did it happen on the day you were leaving?! There was no one around you, and Lilia was still running after Malleus so he would be a few minutes late to the scene.

“L-look, if you want me to stay, I told you that I can’t!” you tried to reason with the prince. Malleus didn’t look like he was having it however.

“I can make the excuse that you weren’t able to make it to the mirror,” Malleus responded. He was only a few inches away from you now, his hand on your chin so you could look up at him.

“How?” you asked slowly, his gaze was too strong for you to keep eye contact with.

“Well it’s simple, have you heard the tale about the sleeping princess? It’s quite popular in Briar Valley,” he gave you a soft smile. Before you knew it, there was what looked like a barrier around you two, shutting off any access from others. From the corner of your eye, you saw what looked like Lilia and Grim.

“Y/N!” Grim shouted, but you couldn’t hear him due to the magic shield around you and the overblotted housewarden.

“We can’t break through this easily,” Lilia held his magic pen in the air before shooting a beam at the wall, but it didn’t make a single dent, let alone a scratch.

Crowley seemed to be on the opposite side, on the top of the stairs, watching what was going on. He too was trying to break the barrier.

“Malleus! This is unacceptable! What are you doing?!”

“Everyone’s so loud outside, they weren’t even invited,” Malleus muttered. Before you knew it, the two of you were teleported somewhere else.

You were still held by the thorns, but you were now standing. You two seemed to be at one of the towers of the school. It was the same place the two of you had the Gargoyle Study Club meetings. No one knew about this location other than Malleus, you, and Silver, but it wasn’t likely the third member of the club would be coming up here soon.

“That’s a bit better,” Malleus gave you a soft smile, something he used to do often when he saw you talk about your life back in your world.

“As I was saying, the sleeping princess is a famous tale, one where she was under a sleeping curse. The curse would only be lifted once she received a true love’s kiss,” Malleus continued, looking off at the distance somewhere. The skies were beautiful after all that night.

“Ah,” you looked down at the ground.

 “You can do that?” you surprised him with your words. “I’ve not been sleeping much lately, and with everything that’s going on right now it doesn’t sound so bad.”

He thought you were joking, but he let you go on.

“I’ve been interested in you as well, so, are you going to kiss me in a couple of months to wake me up? Or am I going to have to wait for somebody else?”

“Child of man, this is no joke,” he looked at you, dead serious in the eyes.

“I know, but with how you don’t want me to go, and how I caused you to overblot, I feel like the least I can do is stay and be asleep.”

“You’re tired.”

“More or less.”

There was a silence in the air. You weren’t sure if playing the situation lightly would get him to come back to his senses. You didn’t want to sleep for eternity, and you didn’t want to risk the chance of Malleus kissing you and you never waking up. So, out of spite, you tried to make things more light-hearted, just like you always tried to brighten his mood.

Malleus closed his eyes and chuckled softly to himself. Suddenly, the whole pressure that was around the two of you seemed to intensify.

“I do not wish to let you go so easily, and as you seem unafraid of a sleeping death, perhaps that is what you truly wish.”

Overblots are hard to stop, and not only that if the overblot is from a powerful mage things could be nearly impossible to stop. Lilia and Grim, along with Crowley, saw the two of you at the tower and rushed up there. But once they reached the top, they saw the two of you, with you in his arms, asleep.

“They're asleep,” Malleus looked at the headmaster, then at Lilia. He was back to normal, with his school uniform and his usual nonchalant aura.

“Draconia, do you know what you did?” Crowley asked. Malleus looked at the headmaster with wide eyes.

“No, I’m afraid I’m not aware. I seemed to have blacked out the moment y/n left for the stairs,” Malleus looked down at you.

“Is y/n okay?” Grim asked, jumping out of Lilia’s arms.

“Yes, they said I was acting strangely before passing out,” Malleus replied.

Somehow, it seems that Malleus was able to return to normal after overblotting, not to mention you were able to stop him from cursing you. You did manage to stay for a little longer, so that both Malleus and you could be less lonely.

“If you did curse me, I don’t know if I would’ve liked it,” you laughed while at the infirmary, Malleus was sitting next to your bed.

“It pains me that I almost did such a thing,” Malleus sighed, closing his eyes and leaning back in the chair.

“But hey, I could’ve gotten a kiss from you, and maybe been less tired” you replied. Before you knew it, Malleus had placed a kiss on your lips.

“There, are you awake now?”

“...As awake as I could be.”

[sinner-sunflower]

P.2 HH Lucifer-centric AU 7/?

STORY 1, PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 14.5, PART 15

Thank you for everyone giving their thoughts in my dms as well as reblogging and liking each chapter!

Italics are flashbacks and I'm sure you can tell which ones haha

-----------------------------------------------

Lucifer doesn't go back to the hotel right away. Instead, he opened a portal to the Palace. The place is as barren as the day his wife and daughter left, no servants, not a single soul except his.

He wondered why they even built something this big. He thinks it's probably because of Charlie and their need to give her a sanctuary that's untouched by Hell but him and Lilith weren't even planning a child when this was first proposed.

Lilith: You need a palace! Fit for a king!

Lucifer: I don't feel like a king, Lily. Besides, we're just two people. I feel like we won't even see each other with all this space.

Lilith: My love, it is only a matter of time before human souls arrive and we must establish our authority the moment they step foot in Hell. No king should mingle with the commoners. You are no human, you are an angel! A being so divine that you must stay untouchable.

Lucifer: But I don't want that, honey. I'm no angel, not anymore and this isn't my kingdom, it's my punishment.

Lilith: Then we make it one.

Right. It was Lilith.

He guesses it was fitting for her. All her life, she was told to basically be a servant for Adam. And when the opportunity of being something higher arose, she took it. Who was he to deny her of her newly found purpose?

Lucifer never wanted to be King but his wife was right, someone has to keep the sinner souls in check. That's his only reason and definitely not because of the guilt eating him alive every second of every day.

Keekee meows at his feet, demanding pets. He smiles at the cat, moving to bend down and giving in to her requests.

Lucifer: Sorry I had to cut the meeting short. I got pretty angry there didn't I? I don't even know why...

Keekee meows in response, head nuzzling his hands. If he didn't know any better, he'd say she's understanding but also berating him.

Lucifer: Yes yes. Your wish is my command.

Michael had done one thing right and that's gifting him Keekee. He may have been the angel of creation but back then, he wasn't powerful enough to magically summon the materials needed to build the Palace out of thin air.

Whether it was because his guilt or some other reason, Michael sent down the one-eyed cat their way. Not necessarily delivering it himself but there was a note that indicated it was from his brother.

Lilith was understandably apprehensive at first but grew to love the cat (Keekee! Cause she turns into a key, my love!) overtime.

He stands up and makes his way further inside his house. Not home. It hasn't felt like a home for a long, long time.

Stopping at the end of the hallway to a dead end, he addresses his companion once more.

Lucifer: Would you mind opening the garden, Keekee?

Without hesitation, the cat jumped morphed through the wall. Not a second later, the wall glowed with an almost Heaven-like pattern, runes moving to unlock a door that was never there.

Lucifer felt a breeze hit him as the door opened like an old friend greeting you with a kiss.

It's the one place in the Palace that he, Lilith, and young Charlie used to spend time on. A place that's made to be a total contrast of Hell's red and chaotic environment. A place where they can pretend to be okay, to feel like a normal family. A place that can rival the original made by his Father.

His own little Garden of Eden.

With Lilith's help, they managed to copy Eden from the unique clouds to the flow of the stream. He remembers almost crying when they looked at it finished for the first time.

Lilith: It looks just like home, Lucifer.

Lucifer: Yeah. It does.

And when the exterminations started, it was where they take Charlie to keep her safe.

Didn't last long anyway. They were all taking a nap one day but then Charlie found a way out and saw her first demon killed by an exorcist blade.

'It all went downhill from there.'

Keekee must be irritated with him zoning out because she scratches his leg to get him back to reality. He laughs at her attempt to pull him inside.

Lucifer: Sorry, sorry! I'm coming, I'm coming.

The cat pulls him to his usual spot under the tree with the flower bed. He picks up Keekee as he sits.

Lucifer: Why don't you go and tell Charlie or Al that I'm back? Tell them I'm just exhausted and that I'll talk to them after resting.

Another meow.

Lucifer: Okay... but only Charlie can come here if she asks where I am.

After licking his face, Keekee bounced off out the door back to the hotel.

As Lucifer drifts off to sleepyland in the comfortable bed of grass, surrounded by flowers and peace, he pats his jacket for a specific pocket containing something that he never got rid off. When he finds what he's looking for, he holds is up to the sky, blocking the artificial sun of not-Eden. A piece of paper that, though he may never admit out loud, gave him just a little bit enough will to continue and live.

He holds the paper to his heart as his eyes flutter shut and dreams of ducks.

'Thrive, Samael.'

-----------------------------------------------

the note and keekee are from Michael!

[monstersdownthepath]

Monster Spotlight: Mngwa

CR 7

Chaotic Evil Large Magical Beast

Bestiary 5, pg. 173

These terrifying man-eaters are a far cry from their original form found in folklore and fairytale, existing only to kill, torment, and punish a particular person, group, or community which has despoiled or disrespected the spirits of the primeval jungles of Golarion. They are hatred embodied, but it's not an indiscriminate hate. No, each Mngwa is born with a Focus of Hate, a creature or group of creatures (up to and including whole cities in some cases) marked for death by the spirits which crafted the shadowy cat, and its these creatures that the Mngwa focuses its wrath upon, ignoring all else unless its murderous spree is interrupted. The Mngwa always knows the exact distance and direction of the closest Focus of Hate, unerringly tracking them so long as they're not shielded by any effect which could block scrying... but a Mngwa is not a stupid, mindless beast. If its focus is shielded magically, then it will track them mundanely, following their scent and the trails they leave behind, stalking them from the shadows when they believe themselves protected, with even the prepared and paranoid often ill-equipped to spot the prowling beasts until its fangs are tearing through their throats.

When I say that Mngwa are nearly impossible to detect in the darkness, I say it completely without exaggeration. Their darkened pelts give them a +23 to Stealth checks when in forest or jungle terrain, and their Jungle Stealth allows them to utilize their full 40ft speed without compromising that intimidating number. They have a constant Feather Step effect allowing them to ignore difficult terrain entirely, and can use both Chameleon Stride and Pass Without Trace at will, the former bringing their Stealth to +27 and making them nearly invisible unless you're standing right next to them, the latter allowing them to evade any attempt to track them without magic. Not that tracking them would do much good, because these beasts are Creatures of the Night and literally stop existing when the sun rises (and are rendered temporarily powerless by Daylight and similar), reappearing near the site of their creation the next night with the benefits of a 15th-level Heal spell nursing whatever wounds they sustained and allowing them to continue their reign of terror.

But doling those wounds out in the first place is difficult, as one must survive the surprise round. As one may expect from a big cat, a Mngwa that has spotted its prey prefers to get the jump on them, which it almost always will, sometimes even allowing its prey to fall asleep first just so it drag away and dispatch the weaker and more vulnerable first like the horror movie monster it is. Once the redshirts are gone and people start staying awake every night, Mngwa charge in with Pounce, allowing them to make their Full-Attack which, predictably, is a Claw-Claw-Bite. The bite deals 2d6+7 damage, while each claw deals 1d6+7 and inflicts 1d6 bleed damage... and all three attacks can Grab onto whatever they hit, and any creature that remains grappled during the Mngwa's next turn can be freely Raked by two additional 1d6+7 + 1d6 bleed claw attacks, letting the beasts swiftly shred anything they get their mouths on. Most creatures targeted by the Pounce rarely survive failing their first Escape Artist check to break its grapple, because that's 6d6+42 damage PLUS 1d6+4 bleed, typically enough to dispatch any creature hovering around 5 Hit Dice even without critical hits.

"1d6+4?" Correct! The Murderous Claws of the Mngwa adds a flat +1 bleed damage to a bleeding target every time they hit, to a maximum of 1d6+7, so even escaping their grapple won't stop the pain, AND it allows the shadow cats to track victims much more easily if they can't staunch the flow. The only mercy offered by the Mngwa's melee is the fact it's got only 5ft of reach, rather than the 10 of a typical Large monster (it still has 10ft of space, though!), so it can only Full-Attack creatures it's standing right next to. Disengaging it repeatedly to force it to step back into melee makes its damage more manageable... provided, of course, you avoided its three grapple attempts when it first Pounced.

Unlike most big cats. Mngwa aren't glass cannons. They have 20 AC and are shielded behind DR 10/Magic, which may as well make them invincible if they're stalking a bunch of level 4 or 5 idiots who have no idea what they've done. Even managing to bypass their DR and cut them down to size does nothing but delay the horror, because so long as the Focus of Hate exists the Mngwa cannot permanently die, returning to life 1d4+1 days later once the sun sets. There are only two ways to prevent the creature's nightly hunts: every single Focus of Hate must die, or the spirits which created the creature in the first place must be appeased somehow.

In the case of the former, depending on what the crime was and how many creatures the Mngwa is focused on, the players may just help the jungle cats in their quest. Of course, ANYONE can be stuck with the jungle's curse, from a dickish thieving invader, to a group of otherwise innocent locals who made a terrible mistake, to the player characters themselves, so this is often not an option. Appeasing the spirits is usually the way to go, so a big part of the Mngwa Mystery is figuring out why it's here, which typically involves finding out precisely who among a crowd it's targeting and getting some answers out of them. Even in a higher-level campaign when the Mngwa isn't a direct threat to the PCs, its relentless inevitability make them a danger to NPCs the party may be tasked with trying to protect.

One way or another, the players have to figure out who it's trying to kill, why, and how to undo whatever they did to enrage the jungle. Mngwa cannot communicate their desires, so some intense detective work is needed! ... Just be careful not to make it TOO intense, or else you may end up with a situation like the most chilling one in it's lore: some unfortunate bloodlines have been haunted by these creatures for generations, the cats passed down from parent to child like a living curse as memories of why the thing is hunting them are gradually lost to time, leaving entire families without the knowledge of why the night itself grows claw and fang to hunt them.

You can read more about them here.

[duckduckgoosebutitsinatrench]

Masterlist

Déjà Rěvè

It's the 1980s, and three dumbass teenagers and their weird cat (that acts a little too human for Aces liking) are getting into stupid situations. Now if only they could figure out how to come to terms with the fact that their feeling might not be as platonic as they all think.

Oh yeah. And they start to have weird dreams about magical and fantasy versions of their friends that bleed over into real life. Plus the mirrors. That's probably important too.

Chapter 1: This Fucking Cat

Chapter 2: Chaotic Mornings and Messy Romance

Chapter 3: [Currently being written]

Hit the Gas

You were having fun. Sure, your life wasn't exactly normal by any means. Your boyfriend was a hyperactive feral puppy of a merman, your job was a little less than conventional, your friends were messy, and your roommate was a literal monster. But you were having fun. I mean, who else got to (illegally) travel in a while other world and (illegally) race against their classmates? Not very many people that's who!

So yeah. You were having fun.

At least until these creepy letters started showing up...

Chapter 1: [Currently Being Written]

Teddy Picker

You love Jade. Maybe a little more than you should.

Jade loves you. Maybe a little more than he should.

Now if only you two could act fucking normal around each other because the bystanders are getting sick of it.

[Currently Being Written]

Antithesis

Bright colors and shiny objects somehow made coping with reality a little better. Sunny days weren't a cure, but they were comparable to small doses of medicine to the seemingly never-ending sadness and tension that you were currently trying to escape from. And even on days like this, where you couldn't help but want to rot in bed and reel about all the things from your old life you were never getting back, at least you could count on Rook to be there for you, even if he's dragging you to every art show and famous ballad in Twisted-Wonderland to do it.

[Currently Being Written]

[flightfoot]

Can you rec fics in which Gabriel isn't the main antagonist?

I mean there are plenty of fics where he isn't the main antagonist, where there's no antagonist at all (ML has a lot of fluff), but I'm assuming you mean fics where there IS a main antagonist but that antagonist isn't him, and probably a more epic sort of story with an antagonist on Gabriel's scale and not like, a high school bully kind of thing (not that there's a lot of those I'd rec anyway).

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Stitched Together by @nedjsmlfavs

Stitch Witch Marinette was just supposed to be having a nice, terrifying outing with her best friends. She never expected to find a magically trapped kitten, but here we are! Whatever happened to this poor little guy?

Poor Adrien, being transformed and chained up for ages, having no idea that he was gonna be rescued. But at least he got to have fun at Marinette’s place as a cat! 

Most of this fic is adorable, though with some dark undertones lying in wait. After all, SOMEONE chained up that poor little kitty…

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In Direct Opposition by @generalluxun

Alya Cesaire is a brand new student to Francis Dupont, to Paris even. The first student she meets is one Chloé Bourgeois, and Alya is determined to make a friend. Things advance Chaotically. Her new 'friend' is definitely a handful, and suddenly Paris has a supervillain and two brand new superheroes! Alya finds herself balancing a lot of things, trying to live up to her ideals and those of her icons.

And then reality seems to contradict itself.

As time progresses it seems to happen more often. Becoming a hero, battling villains, staying alive, working through friendships. Something is lurking, tweaking events at times, changing them, and no one seems aware. Alya will need all her wits to get to the bottom of this. Her investigative mind can only get her so far though, and then she needs to rely on her friends. This is not a foe you can beat head on.

I betaed this entire fic, it’s really good! I adore the focus on Alya’s philosophy here, her determination to be a hero, to help people and defeat evil - and that defeating evil means trying to reform the people doing bad things when possible, to try to save EVERYONE, even the “villain”. I thought it was really clever the ways Alya would redirect Chloe and subtly encourage her to be a better person, while also trying to get the people around her to give her a second chance and keep an open mind. 

Also Alya and Chloe are an adorable sapphic couple XD.

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The Rules of Engagement by @overworkedunderwhelmed

When tragedy sends Adrien Agreste racing back to Paris to run his father’s fashion house, Marinette doesn’t expect much from her very new, very rich boss. At least not until she is set up on a blind date with a very familiar face.

Much to her surprise, Adrien Agreste was hiding far more secrets behind his stoic business-like mask of temporary CEO. Maybe as many secrets as she had been trying to hide for years.

As they grow closer, Marinette fears her mask isn’t nearly as foolproof. Day after day, it gets harder for her to keep all her secrets well hidden from the surprisingly sweet man who insisted on staying by her side as often as possible.

Only she couldn’t afford to fail. Not when her biggest secret could spell the end of the job she’d dreamed about for years.

They might not be superheroes in this universe, but secret identities are still active here. Both Marinette and Adrien used to be involved with the Ladybug and Chat Noir movies, and both kept that a secret - Adrien especially, since if his father found out about it, there could be some bad repercussions, as he voiced Chat Noir without Gabriel’s permission. Marinette, meanwhile, is well known for making cosplay (calling herself “Ladybug” after the movie), and has been in contact with “Chat Noir” for quite some time before the story starts - not that she knows he’s the actual VA.

It’s mostly an Adrienette fic with the two of them getting to know each other after their unusual “first” meeting, where Marinette pretended to be Kagami in order to scupper the date with Adrien and get Tomoe off her back, with some intrigue and drama thrown in. Lila’s skulking around causing problems for the people around her, but she’s honestly not the main focus here. 

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Kwami Magi Homura Magica by Crossoverpairinglover

After eighty-four loops in time, Homura Akemi takes a new path to Paris to save her friends.

The sixty-third loop after that, Homura arrived at the Agreste Mansion.

After clash after clash with the heroes of Paris and its greatest menace, events have reached a tipping point.

Ladybug faces someone verging on a second wish, a wish that endangers space and time to save a friend.

This was an absolutely AMAZING story that crossoverpairinglover dropped out of NOWHERE. Seriously, if you like Puella Magi Madoka Magica and Miraculous Ladybug, this is a real treat - but be prepared to sit down and binge, because it’s over 100,000 words and only has three chapters. 

Anyway, I adore the care that’s taken with going through Homura’s mindset here, she gets a lot of character focus. And the lore! There’s some good explanations here for the history behind kwamis and Incubators’ interactions, and the Order of the Guardians normally treats Magical Girls, and why the Incubators are wrong in their assessment of the universe needing more energy to stave off entropy (hint: it involves Plagg), and just... there was a lot of love put into this.

And the action! Most Miraculous fics don’t have much in the way of fight scenes, and what they do have is mostly just functional. This is one of the rare exceptions. There’s some really long, detailed fight scenes in this (roughly the entire second half of the second chapter has one between Ladybug and Homura), which are a treat to read! 

We also get some glimpses into a variety of other universes here, other timelines, alternate ways things could have gone down - I’m especially partial to the rather detailed view we get of one where Homura sent a message asking for help to the Ladyblog on her third time loop, and how things progressed from there. 

The ending I also thought was really good, a happy ending that generally made sense and dealt with the issue of the Incubators. 

If you can’t tell I’m really happy with this fic, it was incredible and unexpected. The length of the individual chapters can be daunting, but if you’re up for the task, I highly recommend giving it a shot!

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Dreams of You by @chocoluckchipz

Dreams had long been his only escape. Dreams of Ladybug, the girl who had always been there for him.

If only in his dreams. And only while she was also sleeping.

Because with the first rays of sunshine gliding over her skin, with the first fluttering of her eyelashes, from the moment she opened her eyes in the morning, memories of Adrien would vanish from her mind.

She would go on living her life.

He would always be the only one who remembered.

At least until they meet in the real world and fall in love all over again, something that would’ve been easier to do if Adrien wasn't a prisoner in his own home.

Chocoluckchipz has some of the most beautifully executed lovesquare fics I’ve read, and this is no exception. Most of the fic is dedicated to Adrien wooing Marinette, spending time with her, with her own dream self acting as his wingman, giving her tips on how to get her to fall for him, all the while frustrated that she can’t share memories with her waking self, and that she and Adrien can’t share as much information as they’d like while asleep, due to limitations of the “curse” that allows Adrien to share dreams with his soulmate. 

It’s not all cute Adrienette fluff though. There’s a threat in the background waiting to erupt, as the weirdness of Gabriel’s ultimatum to Adrien about finding Ladybug or else being forced to marry Lila keeps on gnawing at him - and with good reason. This is a world with magic and kwamis still, and that fact makes itself very relevant in the last third of the story. 

It’s a well-written tale and very much worth a read!

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