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sheadre · 3 years

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Aurora Borealis (Jiang Cheng x Reader) Part Five

Summary: Zhu Ran'En (Reader) the imperial princess, was sent into exile for a crime she did not commit. Meeting Jiang Wanyin, the Yunmeng Jiang sect’s leader was not just a chance meeting. Their fates were written in the stars however, her relations to the royal family will never let her live in peace. How will she manage to save the kingdom while trying to keep Jiang Wanyin away from the snakes of the royal family?

Word Count: 3076

Warnings: fluff, romance, blood and violence, idiots in love

Previous Chapter - Series Masterlist

Preparations for the arriving attack were made and now you waited nervously for everything to play into completion. The calm mask you wore usually was nowhere to be seen, it was replaced with a deep frown on your delicate face. Jiang Wanyin haven’t said anything ever since you showed him your curse but did not treat you differently. It felt like he accepted that as a fact about you and that was that. The dark dragon’s powers provided you with the ability to use resentful energy for cultivation. It was a legend, a myth circling around the kingdom since decades. Your mother used to tell tales about the mighty dark dragon who protected the kingdom from the northern tribes’ attacks.

You remembered when you begged the Heavens to give you enough power to bring peace to the kingdom and stop your cousin and uncle in destroying it completely. That night was quiet when you decided to spend three nights and days praying in the temple. The last night was the hardest as you knelt there without eating or drinking anything. Your lips were chapped and dry, your bones hurting and your skin prickling with how long it’s been since you last washed your face properly. Your eyes kept drooping as you knelt, murmuring prayers to the heavens. Suddenly, the candles at the altar were blown out by the strong wind hitting you as well and knocking you off balance as you knelt. Tears that stayed unshed now rolled down your cheeks and you quickly wiped at them as you tried to get your bearings back. Suddenly, a hand reached out for your hand. A white, pale hand with slender fingers, a white sleeve ending at the wrist of the person standing in front of you. You looked up in surprise as the person seemed to almost glow. You were greeted with a handsome young man smiling softly at you. His face looked so feminine that you could’ve mistaken him as a woman if he would wear a nice hanfu and some make-up.

“I heard your prayers, your highness” he spoke softly, kindness radiating from his heavenly presence. His voice was gentle like velvet, caressing your ears with every word he spoke.

“W-Who are you?” you asked confused. “How did you get in the palace?”

“I am Xie Lian, your highness, I came in behalf of the Heaven’s Court” he explained patiently. You accepted his hand to help you up but pulled your hand back once you were standing on your feet.

“Why?” you asked again even more confused. Why was a heaven official here and what did he want? You prayed for inner power to defeat the evil, confidence in yourself and strength to move forward even when you’re knocked down. You were so confused, you didn’t even question if he was some lunatic or was talking the truth.

“You prayed for it yourself” another male’s voice scoffed from the side. Your head whipped to the figure who was leaning against a pillar lazily. He was dressed in red clothes, his hair let down freely and a black eyepatch hiding one of his eyes. His presence felt… dark.

“You wished for powers to protect the weak and I was sent to grant your wish” Xie Lian smiled at you gently. You took a step back unbelieving of what was happening. How could you be worthy of the heaven’s attention like this? You wanted will power, not real power. Seeing the frightened expression on your face, Xie Lian took a step closer and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. “The Heavenly Emperor sent me himself and he has a good reason to do so.”

“What reason?” you asked curious. Imagining heaven to have no snakes in the court would’ve been a careless thought, outright stupidity but while people live on the earth, they only care about their petty lives. Xie Lian smiled uneasily and sighed.

“That is unfortunately-“

“You’ll realize how shitty is the afterlife, princess, once you pass on” the other man huffed his handsome face in a scowl interrupting the man dressed in white. You narrowed your eyes at him, eyebrows furrowed but only rolled your eyes in the end at how he was speaking.

“San Lang! Do not be rude to the princess!” the official scolded the red clothed man.

“It does not matter, I have been through worse…” you sighed heavily, tired of everything. You had no energy left as you have been feeling agitated these last few months. No matter how you tried, you couldn’t get everything back to the way they were. It seemed like everything was trying to bring you down. “What do I have to do?”

“Are you this willing to accept such a curse?!” San Lang huffed in disbelief, his eyebrow raising on his forehead high. His chuckle was both mocking and disbelieving as he shook his head. You smiled at him sadly and nodded.

“I may end up in a bad situation but I am ready to protect those who I care about” you said, your heart thumping hard in your chest with determination. You were ready, no matter what you had to do. You had nothing else to lose, your life was not a big prize in exchange of the lives of thousands. “The evil my uncle and cousin are trying to bring onto the kingdom needs to be stopped.”

“Close your eyes, your highness” Xie Lian said and you obliged. You felt the tip of his index finger press against your forehead in the middle before you felt energy surge into your body. You distinctly heard his voice murmur words but everything was a blur. The next time you opened your eyes and everything seemed normal was the next morning. You were woken up by Lili who ushered you back to your quarters while most of the palace was still asleep.

A hand on your shoulder made you jump with a start, surprising you out of your memories. You looked up to see Wei Wuxian look at you confused and worried. His dark eyebrows drawn together as his lips parted to say something in case you wouldn’t recognize him. Your lips pulled into a smile as you motioned for him to join you at the small table by the lake you chose to spend your breakfast at.

“Wei gongzi” you greeted. “Would you like some tea? Or… wine?” you pulled out a small bottle of Emperor’s Smile from your sleeve looking around. “Jiang sect leader forbid everyone from drinking in Yunmeng. But I asked Lili to stash away one for me.”

“Sometimes I do wonder if you’re truly a princess, your highness” Wei Ying chuckled as he accepted the bottle. “Have your highness left all manners of a lady behind in the palace?”

“Sometimes we have to leave manners when it comes to business” you winked at him before both of you let out a mirthful laugh. It was easy being around him, Wei Wuxian was nice and kindhearted even if he tended to hide his concern or pain behind indifference or jokes.

“What kind of business, your highness? Are you implying about asking for my brother’s hand in marriage?” he raised one of his eyebrows playfully. “His heart is already yours, your highness.”

“We always talk about me asking Jiang Wanyin’s hand but shouldn’t he be the one to ask for mine?” you sighed with a sad smile. For the first time in a while, you admitted to someone that you truly cared for the sect leader. Wei Wuxian’s eyes looked at you with curiosity.

“But would you?” his head was tilted to the side. “If his stubborn ass refuses to?”

“That is much more complicated than just a proposal, Wei Ying” you shook your head. “I’m a fugitive, sent into exile, a princess out of the emperor’s favors. Besides… I’m not sure I will live long enough to become a good wife.”

“In the end the only thing that matters is what you feel” the Yiling Patriarch smiled at you with a pain in his brown eyes you were familiar with. “Look at me and Lan Zhan, your highness. Even if I became the villain so others could live peacefully, even if I sacrificed everything, I ended up with the one I was meant to be with.”

“It is still not the same” you chuckled sadly. “Especially because it’s not a hundred percent sure that someone will resurrect me after I die.”

“Who knows?” he grinned at you and lifted his cup before downing its contents. “If you have a good enough reputation?”

Later ~

Dark clouds gathered up above Yunmeng when a disciple ran back through the gates with caution and urgency. He reported seeing the soon arriving army of the three generals. You chewed on your lip with your heart beating fast in your chest. Lili was still away and you had no idea if she managed to get a word with Xiao Pei.

Yunmeng alone wasn’t enough to defend the kingdom and stop the generals. The wait was excruciating as you stood with Jiang Wanyin in the main garden. Both of you were tense as the overwhelming silence stretched between you. It was similar to when you awaited the next showdown between you and your cousin. A sizzling, tight tension that could blow up in a second. Though this time you were standing on the same side with this man.

“Wanyin” you spoke up suddenly. Calling him by his name was not uncommon from you and it always drew his attention to you. Oh, how you loved it when his brown eyes found your form. You stepped closer to him when he turned to you with a frown on his handsome face. “If we survive this… you can ask anything of me. I will do as you say for I am already in debt to you. You’ve given me much help already and I want to express my gratitude.”

“Anything? Are you sure?” his lips pulled into a small almost invisible smile. “I ask you to stay alive. You have much to accomplish on this world, besides… who could beat a dragon, your highness?”

“It is a curse, A-Cheng” you scolded playfully. “Though, I have to admit you have a point. It would be much more easier if I could just scorch the enemy to death with my breath, no?”

You saw the excitement and childlike glee in his eyes at that idea making you laugh mirthfully. You’ve never been so smitten with another person like this. Wanyin was fascinating in every sense for you and you couldn’t help but want to explore all of his buttons by pushing them as far as you could.

“You’d like to see that, don’t you, A-Cheng?” you chuckled making his face grow red as he crossed his arms in front of his chest huffing in embarrassment.

“Just follow our plans, your highness and nothing will go wrong” Wanyin huffed impatiently making you smile fondly. His light blush covering his cheeks told you how embarrassed he was in your presence. Up until you revealed your true nature, Wanyin was struggling to figure out a good plan of attack, his only plans were of defense. Telling him about the full extent of your powers made him let you change some of the battle plans. As you looked at him, your heart started aching knowing that even if he accepted you for who you became, you could still not give him what both you and him wanted. You knew you were soulmates but this lifetime, you were fated to not have an ending together.

Your ears picked up the sound of drums and the marching of soldiers making your heart thump harder against your ribcage. Both of you unsheathed your swords, bodies tense, ready to attack any minute. The enemy soon appeared at the gates Yunmeng Jiang disciples trying to fight them back. Running through the gates, you were soon faced with the first attackers. They were wearing silver armor, crying out to urge themselves into battle while lifting their swords high. Dancing through the onslaught of soldiers was easy, cutting them fatally with every step. Blood splattered on your face and clothes as you moved forward. You were aware of how far you’ve broke into their forces, a lone flower in the sea of weed. Most of the soldiers just went forward without really noticing you unless you were right in front of them. You glanced back at Wanyin when you had a moment to gasp a breath of air in without anyone attacking you.

He nodded at you from afar signaling for you to make your next move. Sheathing your sword, you quickly raised a dark black fog as wide as you could around your form. It was one of your abilities, the HeiWu 黑雾 was one of your favorite tricks. It was harmless but made the enemy blind as long as they were surrounded by the fog. You watched the soldiers of the enemy lose their sense of direction and walk around aimlessly, their faces shocked and terrified. You didn’t need to do anything because the moment they noticed someone get close to them, they cut down their own comrades. Leaving them to kill each other, you walked out of the fog to see Jiang Wanyin still struggling to keep the enemy back. There were many casualties on both sides and a sense of regret filled your heart. So many lives lost to a handful of people’s power hunger. Taking out your erhu, you started playing E’meng keeping a bunch of soldiers behind an invisible wall. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you watched them hold their heads in agony from the notes of your song. Fortunately, the song’s effect was only strong enough to make them pass out.

You suddenly heard battle drums play out a new rhythm and a new wave of soldiers ran out from the enemy’s side. Your eyes widened knowing that they were too close or rather you were too close to the enemy. You wouldn’t have time to retreat back to your side. You were about to start a new song when you were pierced through the chest with an arrow. You blinked a few times in shock until the pain registered in your senses. You lifted a hand to the bleeding wound, your fingers painted with your blood. Before you could do anything, you were yanked backward, strong arms circling your torso, pulling you into a firm chest. The smell of magnolias and the imperial court’s luxurious oolong tea – that was specifically made for only the royal family – filled your nostrils.

“Xiao Pei” you mumbled surprised as you clutched onto your old friend while he held you. He was flying through the sky back to Jiang Wanyin but his hold on you was stable. His handsome face turned to you and a small smile graced his features as he looked back at you.

“I am here, Ran’En” he replied.

Jiang Cheng’s PoV.

The sect leader panted heavily as he slashed down another soldier charging towards him. Using Zidian helped him to thin the lines of the enemy. General Zhou, Li and Huang was attacking relentlessly. He was doubting those three really thought over what they were starting with a rebellion. Overthrowing the power of the emperor was not an easy feat, especially if they were doing it so openly by marching through the kingdom.

They were out of time, the enemy’s lines seemed to be never ending, soldiers swarming the place. Blood was staining the lotus pods’ water while dead bodies littered the courtyard. Yunmeng’s forces were pushed back that they were now trying to defend the walls and gates. He remembered the day the Wen sect massacred his family. Seeing his parents’ bloodied motionless bodies lying in front of Wen Chao’s feet. His hand clenched around the handle of Sandu as he gritted his teeth. The only difference between the past and the present was the fact that he was the one massacring an army that attacked Yunmeng.

“Jiang Cheng” Wei Wuxian pointed in front of him with furrowed eyebrows and slightly parted lips. Wanyin couldn’t determine if his brother was truly this stupid or just fooling around. They were in the middle of a battle and Wei Wuxian decided to point at the sky. He reluctantly looked up to see a man dressed in exquisite clothes fly through the sky with a woman in his arms. It took him a moment to realize who that woman was. He took a deep breath at seeing that she was safely back but cursed himself for letting her in on the planning. He never liked her idea of going into the enemy’s lines so far but her reasoning eased him into the idea.

The man dressed so expensively landed a few feet away from them. The princess pushed away from him and tried to stand on her feet but was clearly not able to. Wanyin looked at the woman in shock when he saw the arrow piercing through her chest. Everyone stood in shock as she fell to the ground coughing up blood. Wei Wuxian was the first to gain his bearings back and hurry over to help her.

“Ran’En!” the unfamiliar man’s voice thundered as she lied there. Wanyin turned to the newcomer who was wearing clothes from fine fabric showing how high in rank he was. The man crouched down to the princess and took her in his arms, lifting her up easily again. Wanyin had to admit, the stranger was handsome, an ethereal divine being from a fantasy novel. Thump. His heart clenched uneasily as he watched the man hold the princess in his arms like she was the most precious thing in the world. He couldn’t stand seeing the princess being so close to that man and Wanyin struggled to find an answer to why.

“Xiao Pei… Thank you for coming” the princess said weakly as blood dripped down her chin.

“Say no more, Ran’En” the man, Xiao Pei shushed her gently before turning to Wei Wuxian. “Get a healer! Now!”

Wanyin just stared at the two of them without his brain processing much of what was happening around him. He was the reason the princess was in that condition. He should’ve helped her, not nearly sacrifice her!

To be continued…

#jiang cheng x reader #jiang cheng #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #wei wuxian #lan wangji #lan wangji x wei wuxian #wangxian #romance #fluff #idiots in love

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cherripeach · 4 years

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Chapter 1

Little Match Maker

Summary: Your life motto is "I have the power of god and anime on my side, don't mess with me," and you stand by that with your life. No human, magician, or random creature could ever stop your firm belief in it.

However, getting transported to this world that seemed to turn your already bad luck worse was not what you wanted to be in your life story, but you made the most of it.Making friends, enemies, and disasters, you were in your prime in this world, and so you decided to help as many people as you could flourish, at least what you believed to be.

Prologue 1-2: Is this a kidnapping?

Chapter Summary: Waking up in a coffin is a great way to spend your day! Don't even ask about the sus masked man and creepy cat.

Words: 3.5k

Relationships: Developing as of now, but future twisted character/reader

Warning: Curse words, jokes about death because lack of fear of danger, joke about Crowley being mentally insane, low-key sex jokes, self deprecating humor, (If I missed anything, please tell me)

Covered in darkness, you were stuck in a small, somewhat squared space. It seemed like today was not your day, but you did get a lot of sleep, you assume. You reached out to every side to make sure that there was no opening or latch that you just could not see. While you were reaching around for something, all the sudden you heard an old creaky door open. Apparently, you were supposedly in a bigger room if this large box containing you could fit in it.

“Was I... kidnapped…?” You could have never guessed this would happen, and you always thought they would be too annoyed with you to actually keep you, “but I’m not a kid.”

It seemed that really nothing would ever go your way because immediately after you affirm your belief that you would not be someone good to kidnap a much greater voice entered the room, and so you stopped your mind to process the words being said, “...lid is too heavy.. Time for my secret move!”

Confusion seemed to radiate off of you at that line, at least, until there was a sharp thud to whatever you were in. But after the thud was a second of calm; nothing happened, no footsteps were heard, and no one spoke. Yet suddenly instead of a loud thud there was slowly heat entering the area you were in. The heat began to engulf the box around you, and soon you could see the bright blue flames eating everything up. In your desperation and in your brain’s rush of survival skills, your mind freaked and decided to take control of your body to both scream and kick the front of this box. The door or whatever of the box spasmed when your kick hit it and your body threw itself up from the heat located in the now black box that looked really much like a coffin. Your observations on where you were ended quickly when you saw a little being running to you. The creature looked like a weird cat mix between a fox or something, but the fact that it was running on its back legs really threw you off. The creature stared at you after you stopped your evaluation of this strange being, and he panicked much like your previous actions.

“wHY aRe yOu up?” the creature could never seem to stop mumbling to themself you learned, and you only heard his last phrase before you could process the rest.

“Wow, the CGI on you is amazing!” This place seemed to be like a living breathing set from your assumption because no kidnapping could ever be as odd and elegant as this place. You always assumed that whenever someone gets kidnapped they would wake up in an abandoned warehouse tied to a wooden chair and men with weapons would come in and interrogate the kid. Waking up in a coffin is not how a kidnapping should happen. Anyway, the cat just seemed as stunned as you and stopped his motions.

“CGAI?? What are you talking about? I am the Great Grim,” the cat bounced back awfully quick after your so-called rude statement to him, “Now give me your clothes, human! Otherwise,... I’ll roast ya.” This “Great Grim” seemed to have quite the ego to think that you would strip for him. He even puffed out his chest throughout his speech and put his paws on his hips.

“Ah ah, no way am I stripping without you giving me money.” You would not be stopped or told to do anything by a little creature that in your eyes could not hurt you.

However, the creature could not swallow your lack of obedience or the words that came out of your mouth, so he in all honesty started to attack you with this “CGI blue fire” again. He acted a lot more like an arrogant child than an arrogant child would act. He even screams something about him being “The Great Grim” again before he gets closer to you. Once he got close to your personal bubble, you decided to see if the fire really was the claimed hottest fire in the world because of its color. You reached out and basically grabbed the fire with an open hand and left it there letting your mind pend what was going on around you, and immediately your brain and its nerves picked up on the pain in your hand. Not believing your nerves, you kept your hand there for another second and pulled it away to look at it, only to notice that the skin on some of your hand was distinguishably different from the rest of your hand. Your mind paused, and you snorted at yourself while you observed your hand and slowly turned around and sprinted from the creature that was gaining on you while you stood there gazing at your hand.

This set or whatever had very real effects as seen by the cat that was continuing to chase you and scream for you to give him your uniform or something and by the bright blue flame. It didn’t just look cool but it also hurt and in your book that’s amazing! The world of CGI and effects really have changed, and wherever and whenever you are, they are way ahead of their time.

Your running from the cat never seemed to stop and you passed tons of weird areas. There was a little classroom, a weird well, and some odd architecture but overall this set was ‘set to perfection.’

You decided to go into the next room you saw to see if this set continued or had any more different scenes, and so you went into this library with tons of floating books. When entering, you noticed that the cat creature was still behind you, but you paid it no mind, not willing to listen to the being and continuing to explore this library.

“You really thought you could get away from my nose? Dumb human! Hand over your clothes if you don’t wanna-” The creature really seemed set on your clothing, but another great sound cut him off as he screamed a large “owww” and later only to respond to the previous sound with a “What’s this cord?”

You turned from the books you were observing and saw a tall man with a top hat and a bird mask like a masquerade party. His cloak and whole ensemble appeared to be out of a fairy tale; he looked like a misunderstood villain whose whole family and lover had died in the past and so he turned to evil in order to help himself deal with the pain. He did look somewhat like an asshole though. Not the point though, let’s get on task.

“This is no mere cord. It is a lash of love.” Briefly in your head you thought that this man deserved to be called clinically insane, but at this point that’s just being rude to those who are. The man after he caught the cat by wrapping the cord around the creature turned to you. “Found you at last. Are you one of the new students?”

And in your haze instead of being confused you nodded, so he continued his speech.

“You should not do things like that. Leaving the Gate on your own!” his manner of speaking was almost too flamboyant for you, but right now all you can do is stick with him and get out of this place, “Not only that, you have yet to tame your familiar which has broken a number of school rules.”

Just as confused as seeing the talking cat, you decided to nod your head and shepley mumble an apology so this man would get off your ass about the talking CGI cat and you apparently. And as quickly as you thought you figured out the situation and what he was trying to lecture you on, the man continued his speech after the cat screamed out that he “wasn’t your familiar!” or something and another.

“Sure, sure The rebellious ones always say things like that. Now quiet down for a moment.” You just watched on as the man slammed his hand over the cat’s mouth and continued on talking, “My goodness. It’s unprecedented for a new student to leave the Gate on their own...how impatient can you be?” His eyes locked on yours to make sure you were paying attention, so you just nodded your head again to show that you were listening when you weren’t.

His speech seemed to be going for a century so you got bored and noticed that after a while he closed his eyes and was not paying attention to you while still having animated hand movements. You, then, began to observe the shelves around you again to see if there was anything odd, and there was, many of the books seemed to be in this weird language that you have never seen. The language looked like something you would find in a horror movie where the people would be so curious to actually touch the book and not throw it away like they should have, so you decided that as much as this place was odd and mysterious you did not want to be that kind of idiot. However, in your inner dialogue of stupid characters in horror movies, the theatrical man turned around with his cap flying behind him and sauntered on out of the room. You realized he probably said something important, but the worst case scenario is he was the one that kidnapped you and would kill you later. No big deal. The main problem right now is that the man was walking too fast for your tastes and has already disappeared from your vision, so you ran to catch up with him.

Finally, you met his step in a hallway, and you decided to ask just what this all was. “Wait, wait, wait sir. First, what’s this Gate or whatever?” You did fake quotes around the word gate by putting up peace signs and bending your fingers, and then you looked at the man with your arms situated over your chest and puffed your chest out to show you meant to be answered when you resumed with “And who are you, man?”

The man, though, was not at all bothered at your vibe and started a new explanation, “It’s the room you woke up in with all the doors...” Then, he went on about this “academy” or something, and you were getting the vibe that this man and this set had to be some kind of prank, “Let’s get a move on!”

You really seemed to be missing the important parts of the conversation or lecture of whatever this so-called teacher is doing if this even is a school, but at this point and time you just want to go back to bed.

He began to stare at your dazed and puzzled form and said, “For I am gracious I will explain everything to you!” This man is like teachers in the fact that if you nod your head and look like you are paying attention, anything is possible. At the end of his speech, you caught the word “ceremony” before he sped off for you to only follow behind him. You went through several more hallways to get to where you think you woke up around. No one remembers what happened once they woke up; it is all just blurred reality.

The man in all of his glory decides that once you arrive at this large door to fling the door open and teacher-yell “Not at all!”

Out of the flurry of voices you were greeted by once the door was opened one person in the cloak just like you calmly states a little disappointedly “Ah, he’s here.”

You decided that with the added amount of people you should probably pay more attention so you can get home quicker and figure this prank out.

“I cannot believe you all…” You really are getting better at tuning the man out because after his short speech this time he turned to you as motioned for you to move in the direction of another object that would come out of a horror movie. You having no context for this mirror or what you were going to do started walking for the mirror while making out the mirror and area around it. Actually, there was a familiar face in the mirror, something you think you have seen from a Disney movie. It was the magic mirror mask (?) from the Snow White movie. It did look a little different with some mask markings by the face’s eyes and the mirror had some more intricate details, but other than that the mirrors looked almost identical.

After your moment of remembrance of the past, you stopped from your walk and put your hand on your chin and just paused to process it all, causing the entire room to stop from their constant talking that you didn’t notice and stare. In a brilliant moment of association, you turned around to the man and the cat that was still in his arms and tried to get out all of what your brain has concluded from the situation, “So like can we just stop this… like I know you were probably hired to prank me or something, but this situation is giving me hardcore cult vibes. Are you gonna like sacrifice me to Satan or something? Please do tell.” The time of the room stopped waiting for a single response to your question. Before there were murmurs here or there as the people were watching you, but now silence pierced the air.

You watched the man’s face after you said your opinion, and while it was covered by a mask, it was clearly obvious from his open mouth and sagged shoulders that he was shocked about the situation. After a moment, he adjusted his tie and dusted his shoulder off in an effort to steel himself, but you were having none of his b.s, and prattled on again.

“Like, I’ll tell you, you lecturing me about this school and that cat is not what I was planning to do today. I would like to get back to my bed and sleep.” You even told him the name of your town, but this just made him more lost than before.

He repeated your town and asked, “Are you even from Twisted Wonderland?”

“Twisted what,” now both of you were lost and gawking at each other.

“Were you not listening to me?”

“Honesty, I thought this was a prank from the second you walked in, and I still kinda do, so I blanked everything out.” You scratched your cheek and made sure you lost your previous eye contact with him. The lack of of chatter from the crowd made your interaction more awkward than even you could make one.

He placed his free hand on his forehead looking almost as disappointed as the first voice you heard besides him and looked down to the floor.

“Right now we are in Night Raven College in Twisted Wonderland where we are at the end of the entrance ceremony. You should be here to become a student at this school as a magician. However, even if you are not from here, the mirror did send for you, so please,” he paused and weakly threw his hand back in the direction of the mirror, “Step in front of the mirror.”

While you knew you could not trust the man, the only thing to do in this situation is turn and step in front of the familiar mirror. The mirror then grasped the attention of all those in the room as asked you to “State thy name,” and you told the mirror your name.

“The shape of thy soul is…” Consequently, the mirror began to join in the confusion of you and the man behind you, “I don’t know.”

You turned around and threw both your hands up in a “don’t look at me” sign only for the man to gaze right in the mirror past you. “Come again?”

The mirror still pulling a puzzled face when it was only a mask tried to state what it knew, “I sense not a spark of magic from this one… the color, the shape, all are nothing. Therefore, they are suited for no dormitory.”

While the people around you began their whispers, and the man behind you gasped in a weird over exaggerated way, you decided to state your mind. “So, like I knew that, but pissy. I’ve always wanted magic and stuff.”

The masked man did not comment on what you said; you think that he probably has had enough of everything. “An Ebony Carriage would absolutely never go to meet someone who can’t use magic. In a hundred years, there has not been one mistake in student selection. So why in the world…”

You cut in with “I’m a total mistake, sir, that’s why,” but the CGI ‘Great Grim’ jumped out of the man’s hold and further cut you off: “Then, I’ll take their place!” All of this is getting too weird too fast so you just casually walked out of the limelight next to someone who was in a group of five, you think, not counting the floating tablet (??). The cat appeared mad before but being in that man’s hold just made him worse.

“Stay right there! Raccoon!” The masked, clearly sus man bolted out after the cat and chased him around at least for a few feet.

“Unlike that dumb human, I can use magic! Let me in the school instead! If you need proof, I’ll show you right now!” The cat was running around the room trying to avoid as many things as possible. You thought that he looked like a crewmate in the waiting ship for Among Us.

The peace did not last longer before the same disappointed voice from when you walked in the room became cross while screaming “Everyone, get down!”

The cat, then, spit out fire in every direction. Neither you nor the person next to you ducked, but you noticed some fire make its way to you and tried to get them out of the way before anything happened. Just as you were about to reach them, they caught on fire. Oops.

“Waaaaah! Hot! My butt’s on fire!” the male, you assumed, yelled right in your ear vibrating your eardrum and causing you to take a step back before fixing the problem. You spotted the man from before screaming to the other people in the room, and then, pointing at the cat.

Two of the taller people next to you began a conversation which you tried to listen in on:

“Good at hunting?... nice, plump snack?” You don’t think you wanted to hear this conversation.

“...Do it yourself.”

You focused your mind back to the boy who was still screaming in your ear until more voices piped up in response to the man.

“Mr. Crowley, please leave it to me.” another boy in the group of five said with this really profound voice. You could just tell he was a bottom or something. You are also assuming that “Mr. Crowley” is the masked sus man.

“That’s Azul for you. Always trying to earn himself points.” Let’s just ignore the talking, floating tablet and everything that should be questioned and focus on the fact that the bottom’s name is Azul.

The boy next to you with his butt still on fire did not find this conversation as interesting as you which in retrospect is obvious because of the fire on his butt. “Um, hey, could someone put out the fire on my butt already?”

“O gosh, I’m so sorry. I got really distracted by everything,” You aimed all your concentration that you had at the boy. You slapped the area that was on fire several times to get the fire out, and after a few slaps, the fire slowly extinguished on the boy. The fire was not as bad as it looked.

The boy turned around to face you and beamed at you as you believe the personification of the Sun would look like. “Thank you!!” His bright red eyes gazed right through your soul through your eyes, sparkling every couple of seconds. You patted the golden retriever’s hood as he just continued to beam through you. He even grabbed your hands and shook them rapidly several times to show his thanks to you and squeezed them to finally drop his grip.

You ignored the conversation that was happening between several others of the group of five in favor of staring at the young sun. A couple seconds after two of the clocked people began to run after the cat. That was your clue to start to pay more attention to the situation at hand than the sun.

~~~

So this was supposed to be a lot sooner but then exams hit and that's always fun. This chapter just had to have my mind commenting on everything, so half of the chapter we don't even know what happens, but it's really only gonna be for this chapter. Thank you for reading this, and I apologize for any mistakes, but I hope you enjoy it! Have a great day or night!

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fanmoose12 · 4 years

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Erwin was his King, and Levi was his knight. He was his most trusted soldier and his most loyal subject. Levi took an oath, swearing his life and soul in servitude to his King.

His heart, unfortunately, belonged only to a Queen.

“Are you serious?” Levi hisses, staring at Erwin and not believing his ears. “Have you really chosen her? Out of a dozen other candidates?”

“My decision is final,” Erwin calmly replies. “Lady Hange of House Zoe will become my wife and our Queen.”

“You’ve gone mad,” Levi sighs, knowing it is futile to try and change Erwin’s mind. “That woman could never become a Queen. She doesn’t seem to know what etiquette is and she has no manners whatsoever! She wore man’s clothes to a ball, for god’s sake!”

“My decision is final,” Erwin repeats in a more commanding voice, getting tired of Levi’s theatrics. “Lady Hange is kind and sympathetic, and she is insanely smart. She will make a great Queen.”

“Are we talking about the same woman? Lady Hange I’ve seen is a complete lunatic with more than a few screws loose.”

“Oi!” suddenly a voice appears from another room. Levi freezes in his place, immediately recognizing that deep contralto. “It’s not nice to talk like that about future Queen.”

Erwin chuckles warmly in his seat, and Levi slowly turns around.

Just as he expected, Lady Hange walks into the room, her loyal knight trudging after her, as always.

Levi already opens his mouth to apologize, even though he feels no inclination towards that woman, he spoke about her with utmost disrespect. Even if she wasn’t a future Queen, she still remains a part of the nobility, and Levi, a street rat with no family name, just offended her.

However, Lady Hange doesn’t seem to be mad. Where any other noble woman would immediately begin screaming, demanding Erwin to behead him right here and right now, Lady Hange just smiles, her eyes sparkling with amusement behind the lenses of her glasses.

“I take no offence at your words,” Hange reassures him. “Actually no one has ever talked about me like that. Especially to my face. It feels so refreshing, right, Moblit?” she turns to her knight, and the man just nods, obviously accustomed to his Lady’s eccentric behavior.

“I should probably introduce myself once more,” Hange curtsies in front of him, and Levi curses under his breath upon seeing how clumsily she does it. “Since I didn’t seem to make much of an impression on you the first time,” she winks at him, smirking, and Levi’s cheeks start to redden.

He remembers their first meeting all too well.

Lady Hange just returned from a hunt with other nobles. She tried to introduce herself to Levi, outstretching her hand to him. And Levi, looking at her hand, which had dirt on it, refused to touch her. He ignored her completely, turning around and walking away from her.

Well, he couldn’t have known that Erwin would decide to make her his Queen, could he?

But now Levi has to repent for his mistake.

So he stands on one knee, taking Hange’s hand in his.

“I deeply apologize for my foul mouth and my improper behavior,” Levi closes his eyes, glad that due to his kneeling position neither Hange, nor Erwin can see his face. They can’t see how annoyed he truly looks and how fiercely he glares at Lady Hange beneath his fringe. “I hope milady would find it in her heart to forgive me.”

Levi hopes she will actually buy his lie.

Hange doesn’t. Instead, she starts laughing, loudly and definitely unladylike.

Levi snaps his gaze to look at her.

“You are a terrible liar, Sir Levi,” she tells, when she finishes laughing. “But as I said, you do not need to apologize. I harbor no ill feelings towards you.”

“I told you she is a very kind woman,” Erwin smirks, as he comes to stand beside Hange.

Levi swiftly lets go of Hange’s hand and gets to his feet. His face still burns in embarrassment.

“And I called you here not just to announce my engagement,” Erwin’s face becomes serious, all signs of mirth and amusement gone, as he is once again wearing a mask of a King. “I need you to look after Lady Hange, at least until our wedding and her coronation. Some people from the court may not welcome my decision, and they may try to harm Lady Hange. You cannot let that happen, Levi.”

“Your Majesty!” Hange’s knight, Sir Moblit, calls. “I am more than capable of looking after my Lady!” he then turns his gaze to Levi, furrowing his eyebrows and staring at him with distrust.

“I’m sure you are,” Erwin smiles at the man. “But Sir Levi is one of my most trusted man, and I would feel much calmer if he looked over Lady Hange,” Erwin turns to look at Levi, staring at him intently. “I entrust you with my future wife’s life and safety, Levi. Do not let me down.”

“Of course,” Levi nods readily. Whatever he feels for Hange and how much the woman irritates him, it does not really matter. Erwin, his King, gave Levi an order. And Levi will do anything and more to accomplish this task. “As long as Lady Hange is beside me, no harm will ever come her way.”

Before Levi walks out of the room, dutifully following after Hange, Erwin gives him another look. And Levi understands its meaning without explanation. There is more to Erwin’s order than he said out loud. There is something else that troubles him. Erwin doesn’t trust his fiancé as much as he has said, so now it is Levi’s task to make sure that Lady Hange is just as kind and trustworthy as she appears.

***

“You have to eat, Lady Hange,” Moblit practically pleads, hovering over her.

Hange doesn’t even look at him, waving her hand in his general direction. “Mm, of course, I’ll do just that as soon as I finish this book.”

Levi quietly tsks. He has spent an entire week, following Hange. And that exact same scene repeats every single day.

He had enough of it.

So he grabs a chair and sits next to Hange. “He’s right, you know. You do need to eat. And a bath.”

That’s finally gets Hange’s attention. She turns around, grinning. “Are you saying I smell?”

“I’m saying you reek, Your Majesty.”

Hange doesn’t seem bothered by his rude words. On the contrary, the grin on her face widens. “I’ve told you, you don’t need to call me by my title. I mean, you call Erwin by his name, right?”

Levi’s eyes widen. Had he slipped in front of her? He does call Erwin by his name, but never in front of other people.

Hange’s grin turns into a soft smile, as she sees his troubled expression. “You didn’t do it in my presence,” she assures him. “I just guessed it, don’t worry.”

She’s insanely smart, Erwin’s voice rings inside his head. Of course, how he could forget it.

Still, her knowing gaze disturbs him, so Levi decides to change the topic. “Your knight calls you Lady Hange.”

“She’s a member of a noble family!” Moblit exclaims, scandalized. “I can’t just call her by her name!”

Levi shrugs. “I can.”

Hange nods approvingly, and then returns to her book. She thinks their conversation is over. Levi has a different opinion.

“You still need to take a bath.”

“Sure, as soon as I finish this.”

She doesn’t lift her eyes from that book. Levi starts to get angry.

“Hange, bath. Now.” he says lowly, getting to his feet and looming over her. “This is your last warning.”

“Of course,” she replies. Not even a glance in his direction.

Well, he did warn her, right?

“Levi!” Hange shrieks, as he lifts her from the chair and tosses over his shoulder, as though she’s a sack of potatoes, and not a future Queen. “Let me down! Immediately!”

“I’ll let you down, don’t worry. When we’ll get to your chambers.”

“Levi! This is preposterous! You can’t do that to me!”

“And what are you going to do?” Levi lazily inquires, as he starts walking out of the library. “Behead me? Hang? Dismember?”

Hange huffs, crossing hands on her chest. Levi, that fucker, knows that she won’t do any of those things. The rascal got too comfortable around her. Hange fumes, thinking of a way to get out of this ridiculous situation. She really needs to finish that book.

She has seen Levi train, he is strong, so there is no way she can fight him alone. Her eyes land on Moblit, who is walking behind them.

“Moblit!” she outstretches her arms towards him. “My faithful knight! Save me from this vile man!”

Moblit instantly looks away. “I’m s-sorry, Lady Hange,” he stutters, scratching his neck. Hange really, really doesn’t like the nervous look on his face. “But you do need to rest.”

“I can’t believe it!” Hange screams. “You are in cahoots with him! My knight, my most loyal man has betrayed me!”

“For the love of gods, stop shouting,” Levi admonishes with a tired sigh. “No one has betrayed you. We’re doing this for your own goddamn sake.”

“Nifa drew you a bath, milady,” Moblit says with a sweet smile. “And I’ll bring you food.”

“And if you’ll be a good girl and do, as we say,” Levi adds. “I’ll even bring your stupid book.”

“Fine,” Hange agrees. There is nothing she can do about it, after all. She is outnumbered. “But you’ll bring me all the books I ask.”

Levi rolls his eyes. “Whatever it takes to make you clean.”

***

As Levi spends more time around Hange, he learns that the most annoying thing about her isn't her over-friendliness, unbelievable messiness or even her apparent disrespect for court's rules. No, it's the fact that she doesn't seem to know what peace is.

She is always running around, rushing from one task to another, taking no breaks and stopping not even for a second.

As he follows after her, getting to know her better, Levi now sees why Erwin has chosen her. Hard-working, diligent and borderline obsessed with her duties, she seems like a more cheerful version of Erwin himself.

She is also smart. It's hard not to notice, especially since Levi spends literal days by her side, sitting with her in the library and watching her devour book after book. She is intelligent and is not afraid to show it. As he listens to Hange trade ideas with the best scholars of their kingdom, Levi starts suspecting that she's smarter than even Erwin.

But there are others sides to her character, the ones that amaze Levi even more.

Hange is kind, Erwin wasn't wrong about it. But he forgot to mention exactly how kind she is.

Hange comes to town frequently, and there she buys fresh bread for beggars and sweets for children. She visits orphanages, bringing toys and books with her. She sits with children in a circle, reading to them, or she helps with their studies, or she runs with them in the fields, as though she is just a simple woman like them, and not the future Queen.

The more Levi watches her, the more apparent it becomes to him just how right Erwin was, when choosing Hange as his Queen.

She is smart and sharp, just like Erwin. But she is also kind, so very kind. And where Erwin cares only about a big picture, she sees all the tiny, but necessary details. Erwin has his goals, important, essential goals. He wants to improve their kingdom, to make it stronger and richer than before. But Hange cares about people, about simple, common people that Erwin so often forgets. But when she'll be sitting on that throne, right next to Erwin, she won't let him forget. She'll remind him what it means to be a King.

But there are other, less regal parts of Hange's personality.

Her sense of humour, for example.

Levi loathes to admit it, but she's the funniest goddamn person he has ever met.

She's sarcastic and cocky, and it’s near impossible to offend her. Whenever Levi slips and insults her, she doesn't reprimand him, doesn't remind him of his place. No, instead she accepts whatever insult he throws her away, and then gives him a much more vicious and cutting reply.

And it's.... It's invigorating. Levi could spend hours just bantering with her.

Hange constantly keeps him on his toes, always surprising Levi with the weirdest shit that comes out of her mouth, and he... He likes it. As annoying as Hange seems, Levi's genuinely enjoying himself when he's with her.

Hange is certainly one of a kind. Levi should have realized it earlier.

After all, Erwin doesn't make mistakes.

***

Two weeks later, Levi comes to Erwin’s study to tell him exactly that.

As always, Erwin is working, stacks of papers littering his giant desk.

“Hange is trustworthy,” Levi says, as he takes a seat across from Erwin. “You did not need to worry.”

Erwin raises a brow at Levi’s casual familiarity, but decides not to press it. “That’s not the only thing that made me worry.”

“You really think someone will try to harm her?” Levi asks, slightly taken aback.

“Hange isn’t very popular among other nobles.”

“You know something,” Levi realizes, narrowing his eyes.

“I suspect something,” Erwin corrects. “I don’t have any evidence.”

“Yet.”

“Yet,” Erwin agrees, his jaw set. Then he sighs and puts down his quill. “There is going to be a hunt before the wedding. It’s an important tradition,” Erwin emphases last words enough to let Levi know what exactly he thinks about it. “Nobles from the whole kingdom will be participating.”

“And you think someone will try to get rid of Hange there?”

Erwin nods, his face grave. “During the hunt, future husband and wife must chase their separate preys alone. And then whatever they catch, they share during the wedding’s feast. It symbolizes the promise to share everything.”

“That is stupid,” Levi huffs.

“It is,” Erwin agrees. “But it is a tradition, and whether I like it or not, I must follow it.”

“So Hange is going to be hunting alone…”

“Not exactly. As members of noble families, we are allowed to take two guardsmen with us. But even so, I’m afraid someone may use this opportunity. And that’s why I ask you to look after her.”

“Don’t you want me by your side?”

“No,” Erwin answers with a smile. “If anything happens, the others members of the royal guard will protect me.”

“Why don’t you give them to Hange?”

“I don’t trust them like I trust you.” Erwin replies, his blue eyes staring straight at Levi.

“Alright,” Levi sighs, refusing to let the weight of Erwin’s words drag him down. “I’ll protect her.”

“Thank you, Levi,” a smile returns to Erwin’s face.

Levi wants to get up and leave Erwin to his work. But there is something else he needs to tell him.

“I know you’re busy, and, gods my witness, Hange doesn’t stop working even for a second, but,” he begins, deliberately avoiding Erwin’s eyes. “Maybe, you should spend more time with your fiancé. If you keep ignoring her like that, she’ll get… lonely.”

Levi doesn’t understand how that thought appeared in his mind. But the fact remains that it did, and he has been thinking about it for a while now. Hange doesn’t seem depressed or sad, and especially she doesn’t look lonely, but… Erwin and Hange are going to marry. Levi knows that neither of them are doing it out of love, but Erwin is his friend, Levi cares about him and wants him to be happy. And Hange, as annoying as she is, is kind and compassionate. She deserves to be happy too.

“She won’t get lonely,” Erwin replies, his gaze returning to the papers on his desk. “Especially with you by her side.”

Levi doesn’t quite understand what Erwin means by his words, and Erwin refuses to look at him, already lost in his work. So Levi has no choice, but to quietly leave his study.

And as hard as he tries, Levi can’t seem to get those stupid words out of his mind.

***

In the morning of the hunt, Levi checks on his horse, while discreetly surveying his surroundings. Erwin was right, a lot of nobles gathered for this hunt. Most of them talk and laugh, while waiting for their servants to finish preparing the horses.

Almost none of them pay much attention to Hange.

She doesn’t seem to mind, as she chirpily discusses hunting dogs with Erwin and Lord Mike, one of Erwin’s closest allies. Levi cocks his head, taking a closer look at Mike, but, despite being twice as taller and twice as wider than Levi himself, the man doesn’t seem threatening or suspicious in any way.

Levi looks around the courtyard again. Some lords and ladies glance in Hange’s direction, as they whisper something to one another. He tries to remember their names, but is interrupted by a hand that claps his shoulder.

“Sir Levi,” Moblit slightly bows his head. “Are you ready for the hunt?”

“Almost,” Levi replies, tightening the reins of his hours. “Do you wish to discuss something?”

“Just a small warning,” Moblit chuckles. “Lady Hange is a very smart woman. She is wise too, but… not always.”

Levi quirks his eyebrow, silently asking Moblit to be more precise.

“When she gets excited… she can become a little bit careless,” he admits.

“Oh,” Levi breathes out. It isn’t exactly a surprise, but… “Thank you, Moblit. I’ll keep a more careful eye on her.”

“Shall we go then?”

Levi nods and together they make their way over to Hange.

As soon as they’re next to her, Hange turns around with a wide grin. “Ah, my two faithful knights!” she chuckles, wrapping her hands around Moblit and Levi’s shoulders. “My dear husband,” she winks at Erwin. “I’m now ready to start the hunt.”

“Your desire is my command,” Erwin answers with a charming smile.

Then he turns around, addressing the gathered nobles.

And so the hunt begins.

***

At first, everything is going smoothly. Levi, Moblit and Hange are riding slowly through the forest. Hange and Moblit are reminiscing about their days in Zoe’s estate, while Levi silently admires the scenery.

It’s peaceful. It’s quiet. Levi enjoys it.

The peace and quiet is unexpectedly destroyed, when Hange lets out a loud shriek. That’s all the warning Levi gets before Hange sends her horse into a gallop. He freezes for a second too long, just watching her disappear into the distance. It’s only when Moblit starts calling after her, as he speeds his own horse, that Levi finally snaps out of his daze.

“Shit,” Levi grunts, as he hurries after them. “A little bit careless my ass! When I get to that fucking idiot, I’ll kill her with my own hands.”

Levi strokes the horse’s nape, whispering soothing words into her ear and urging her to go faster. Where did four-eyes learn how to ride so fast? He can’t even see her. Worry starts to fill his mind, as Levi desperately tries to keep up with her. He promised Erwin, he can’t let him down.

He can’t lose Hange.

Levi strains his ears, trying to hear something else, except the beating of his heart and the sound of his horse’s hooves hitting the ground. He can’t hear anything, but then—then that silence is ripped apart by a panicked scream.

Levi recognizes Moblit’s voice and, for a second, his heart stops beating. The world seems to stop altogether, as he turns the corner and sees this terrifying scene.

Moblit is kneeling over someone’s body. No, not someone’s, it’s Hange, Hange’s body is lying prone on the ground.

In a daze, Levi gets off his horse and runs to them. He doesn’t realize what he’s doing, doesn’t really register his movements, until he’s kneeling next to Moblit, looking down at Hange’s face.

There is blood, oh gods, so much blood.

“What happened?” Levi asks in a raspy, desperate whisper.

“I d-don’t know,” Moblit isn’t feeling any better than him, his voice shaking and his hands trembling, as he tries to bring Hange back to consciousness. “I f-followed after Lady Hange, but I still was too far away. I’m not sure what really happened, but her horse got spooked by something and it threw her off. Lady Hange fell and the horse kicked her or, maybe, she hit her head against the rock, I d-didn’t get a good look.”

Moblit sounds like he’s ready to cry, so Levi lifts his hand and squeezes his shoulder. “I know that you’re scared and I know that you worry for her,” he locks his eyes with Moblit’s, making him listen. “But I need you. Hange needs you. Can you find Erwin? And get some help for her?”

“O-of course!” Moblit hurries to his feet. “I-I’ll try to be as swift as possible. Please, take care of her,” he says, before he gets on his horse and rides away.

Levi emits a deep sigh. Moblit will get Erwin, and Erwin will help Hange. Everything will be fine. All he needs to do is to sit tight and wait for the help to arrive.

He carefully lifts Hange and puts her head on his knees. He tries not to think about the blood on her face, or the unusual paleness and stillness of her features.

It is just a head wound, Levi reminds himself. He received a dozen like this, when he was training to become a knight. But somehow, Hange’s wounds seem worse, far more severe than any injuries Levi himself had ever received.

Does he feel so, because she’s a future Queen? Erwin’s fiancé? Or because she’s simply Hange, a woman Levi spent his past two weeks with? A cheerful and kind woman, whose smile is so bright, it lights up the whole room? Whose laughter always makes Levi feel just the tiniest bit better? Who doesn’t care if he’s a scumbag from the streets and considers him an equal despite their different upbringings?

Who is Hange for him? Levi can’t quite answer this question yet, but he knows one thing. He won’t let anyone harm her again. And if he finds a person, who did it, who spilled so much of her blood… he will kill them without hesitation.

“You know it’s very rude to stare at maidens with such a scary expression?”

Hange’s hoarse voice brings Levi out of his thoughts. He stares at her, dumbfounded. He didn’t even notice that she came back to her senses.

Levi looks at her stupid grinning face, and relief nearly overwhelms him. He brings Hange closer, until their foreheads are touching.

“You scared me so fucking much, you idiot,” he tries to sound gruff, annoyed and angry. But his words come out in a soft whisper.

“This?” Hange touches her bloody face with a finger and then shows it to Levi. “It’s nothing! I had so much worse when I was a kid.”

Levi moves away, scrunching his nose in disgust. “This explains so much.”

Hange bursts out laughing, and Levi’s so mesmerized by the sight of her smiling face that he almost doesn’t notice Erwin’s arrival.

As soon as he sees him, though, Levi hastily gets to his feet, taking a few steps away from Hange. If anyone would see him, almost embracing the future Queen, people would get wrong ideas.

Levi doesn’t want to encourage that.

Erwin kneels in front of Hange, his brows furrowed in an expression of worry. “What happened?”

“Nothing serious!” Hange assures with a smile. “I just thought I saw a deer and proceeded to chase it. Then my horse heard some loud noise or something and threw me off.”

“A loud noise?” Erwin asks, scratching his chin.

“Your horse isn’t that easily spooked,” Moblit adds, his eyes nervous, as he surveys his Lady’s injuries.

“It isn’t time to think about it,” Levi interrupts, glaring at Erwin. “We need to get her to healer.”

“You’re right,” Erwin stands up, helping Hange get to her feet. He then lifts one of her hands and throws it over Levi’s shoulder. “Get her to the castle,” Erwin orders.

“And you?”

“I need to look around,” Erwin replies seriously. “Take care of her, Levi.”

“Will do, Your Majesty,” Levi gives him a bow.

He hovers over Hange, as he gets her to his horse and then sits behind her, spurting the animal into action.

“Erwin thinks someone tried to hurt me?” Hange asks, as they ride through the forest.

“He didn’t tell you?”

“No,” Hange shakes her head. “But he didn’t need to. I’m not an absentminded weirdo everything thinks I am. I notice things too.”

“Erwin doesn’t think you about you this way,” Levi replies. “And neither do I.”

And before Hange can say something, Levi speeds up his horse. “Let’s hurry up. We need to show that wound to the healer.”

***

Back at the palace, the healer assures Levi and Moblit, who arrived just after them, that Hange’s wound isn’t serious. One day at the infirmary, and she will be back on her feet.

Still, neither Moblit, nor Levi leave her side, sitting next to Hange’s bed.

Moblit reads to her and entertains her with conversation. Levi just sits there, not talking and not taking his eyes off Hange even for a second.

He should go, he knows that. Erwin asked him only to bring her back, he said nothing about keeping her company, but whenever Levi tries to leave, he remembers Hange’s bloodied face and feels almost a physical need to stay.

He can’t let any harm come her way. And he won’t.

In the evening, Erwin comes to visit her. He looks tired, but as soon as he sees Hange, he puts on a warm smile.

“Are you feeling better?” he asks her, as he takes her hand in his.

“Of course!” Hange beams. “I don’t really think I need to spend the night in infirmary, but the healer insisted,” she huffs a bit petulantly.

Erwin brings her palm to his lips, pressing a soft kiss there. “I’m sure the healer just wants to make sure you’re alright. Our wedding approaches and I want you to be healthy during the ceremony.”

“It will be embarrassing, if you faint while reciting vows,” Levi stands up and comes to stand next to Hange.

He doesn’t know why, but he feels uneasy, when all of Hange’s attention is focused on Erwin. They are to be married soon, Levi knows that. And he really wants them to be happy. But whenever Erwin touches her so gently, Levi has a weird feeling inside. It clutches his heart and twists his insides.

The feeling is gone the moment Hange’s eyes are set on him.

“Levi?” Erwin’s voice brings him back to reality. “Can we talk outside?”

Levi nods and follows Erwin into the corridor.

“So?” Levi crosses hands on his chest, staring up at Erwin. “You found something?”

“No,” Erwin shakes his head. “If there was foul play involved in Hange getting injured, I couldn’t find any evidence of it.”

“Maybe, it was an accident?”

“Maybe,” Erwin agrees, although his hard gaze and pressed lips tell a different story. “But in the meanwhile, keep watching over her. At least, until the wedding.”

“As you wish,” Levi promises, before going back to Hange.

***

The royal wedding is beautiful. Levi has been living in the palace for almost seven years now, but he has never seen a celebration more grand that this.

Hundreds of nobles come to the palace, all of them wearing the brightest and biggest jewelry and the most extravagant, colorful clothes they have.

The church, where the wedding is held, is the most majestic building Levi has ever seen. It’s big and spacious, the ceilings are high and the windows are wide. The warm sunlight trickles inside, making everything glisten.

Erwin himself is dressed in a majestic blue doublet, adorned with small white wings, which symbolize their kingdom. He wears a crown on his head, and there is a pleased smile on his face, as he stands in front of an altar, waiting for his almost-wife and Queen.

It’s a beautiful day, and it will be a beautiful wedding.

But when those giant doors open, when Hange finally walks in, Levi comes to a realization that none of it – nothing in the world - compares to her beauty.

And it’s weird, because Levi has never thought of her like that, Hange is a million different things – she is weird, annoying, loud, kind, smart, funny or endearing, but she’s never beautiful, not like this.

Watching her walk down the aisle feels almost surreal. That woman in a long white gown, who walks with her eyes slightly cast down, looks nothing like Hange. And even though, deep down, Levi prefers the Hange he knows – the one, who wears man’s clothes to a ball and whose hair always sticks in different directions, he can’t tear his eyes away from her.

And he feels horrible just thinking about it, doesn’t understand, where those feelings even came from, but as he watches Erwin lean in to press a kiss on Hange’s lips, the priest announcing them husband and wife, Levi desperately wants to be in Erwin’s place.

***

The feast that begins just after the wedding is nothing short of horrible.

The dining hall, where it’s being held, is too warm and stuffy, and the guests, who get progressively drunker with every goddamn minute, are loud and messy.

Levi hates it. He wants to leave. He wants to close himself in his chambers, or, maybe, go to the training grounds and let out all of his frustration in a slightly more productive manner.

But he can’t.

Because Erwin has left to talk with ambassadors – or so he claims – Levi doesn’t quite understand how one can leave the celebration of their own wedding earlier, and Moblit is getting drunk with other knights, so there is no one, but Levi, who can look after their newly coroneted Queen.

Who is currently getting drunk herself, seemingly undisturbed by the absence of her husband. As he hears her utter another stupid, and surprisingly vulgar, joke to Lord Mike, who sits next to her and is roaring with laughter at every word that comes out of her mouth, Levi decides it’s time for some intervention.

So he stands behind Hange, grabbing her by the collar of her shirt (thank gods, she changed into her usual clothes earlier, all Levi’s strange feelings are gone along with that dress). “Hange, I think it’s time for you to leave,” Levi resists the urge to gag, as he sees that the front of her shirt is stained with something dark and sticky.

“But Leeevi,” Hange lifts her head and stares at him upside down. Her stupid grin makes something flatter inside Levi. Maybe, he shouldn’t have eaten that fish. “I’m having so much fun!”

Levi glares at the man Hange is having so much fun with. Lord Mike seems as inebriated as their new Queen.

“C’mon, Hange,” Levi lightly pulls on her collar. “Get up and let’s go.”

“Leeeevi,” Hange whines, looking at Levi with puffed out cheeks. It’s an absolutely ridiculous expression, and Levi definitely doesn’t find it even a tiniest bit adorable.

“Don’t make me call Erwin,” he says, turning away. Her stupid pouting face wasn’t working on him.

“You’re no fun at all,” she huffs, but, thankfully, gets to her feet.

She only slightly sways, as she stands up. Levi sighs and takes her by the hand.

It’s good that everyone in the dining hall is too drunk to see that their new Queen is leaving her wedding feast, hand-in-hand with a knight.

"Levi..." Hange calls, as they walk through the palace's corridors. She sounds different than before, her loud mirth is gone, and when Levi stops and turns around to look at her, he sees that her cheeks are slightly red, as she stares at him.

Levi can't quite guess if that's the effect of alcohol or a trick of light.

"What?" he asks, feigning annoyance. In truth, Hange's weird expression makes his heart beat faster. "Don't tell me you're going to throw up."

"No!" Hange shakes her head with a smile. "I just wanted to thank you... For looking out for me. I don't deserve such kindness."

"Don't be an idiot," Levi scoffs as he starts walking again. "You deserve that and so much more."

"What?" Hange pulls on his hand, stopping him again. "What did you say?"

Levi looks at her. Is she really going to make him say it?

He takes a deep breath. "I said that you deserve so much more. You're incredible, Hange, I don't think I need to tell you that, and you deserve so much more than this."

What he means by this - his kindness, or marriage to Erwin, or the fact that he left her on the night of their wedding - Levi doesn't know. But he knows that if he had a chance, just a smallest chance, he'd do everything he could to make Hange happy.

"You really think so?" she asks, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "You really feel this way about me?"

As she stares at him with those big eyes and that tiny, shy smile Levi thinks that he wants to kiss more than anything else in the world.

That thought surprises him, it comes out of nowhere, but once it’s there, Levi can't get it out of his head. He needs to finish this conversation, and then he needs to go to the training ground and run as many laps as it takes to get rid of ridiculous thoughts such as these.

"Yeah...I do," Levi nods and turns away, hoping that Hange is satisfied with his answer.

Of course she fucking isn't.

"I thought you hated me," Hange says, her voice is so surprised, as though she really thought this way.

"Idiot," Levi rolls his eyes. "If I hated you, I wouldn't have bothered with your stupid ass."

Levi's mind doesn't completely register what happens next. One moment, he was standing in the middle of a hallway, and in the next he is pressed against the wall, as Hange looms over him. Her hands are on his shoulders. She hesitates for a quick moment, her eyes darting from his lips to his eyes. Whatever she sees there, Levi doesn't know, but in the next second she puts her lips on his.

Whatever Levi has been thinking about comes to a full stop.

Hange... Hange is kissing him. Hange, his Queen, Erwin's wife. He is kissing Erwin's wife. Erwin, the man who saved him, who gave him a second chance in life, who took him out of the slumbers of the lower city. His friend, his King to whom Levi sworn his life. He has sworn to follow him to hell and back, to sacrifice his life without hesitation.

And right now... He is kissing his wife. He has to stop, has to push Hange away. He won't betray Erwin. Not like this.

But just for a moment, just for a second, Levi lingers there, savoring her taste, losing himself in the feeling of her body, pressed against his.

He will remember this, he will remember this small moment for the rest of his life.

His hands tremble with the desire to touch her, to embrace and hold her in his arms.

Instead Levi puts them on her shoulders and pushes her away.

Hange's eyes, when she looks at him, are confused.

She looks so lost, and Levi wants nothing more than to comfort her, to tell her how much she really means to him.

But he can't.

So he puts as much disdain and indifference in his eyes as he can.

"You're drunk, Your Majesty," he says, no, he spits it out.

Hange looks as though he slapped her. There is so much pain and hurt in her eyes that Levi almost starts apologizing. I don’t mean it, he wants to say. I love you more than anything, he wants to confess.

But duty was always more important to him. Before he met Hange, duty was everything to him. He can’t change his priorities now.

So Levi hurries to turn away and close his eyes, before he sees tears streaming down her face.

He won't be able to walk away then, he won't be able to let go.

"Go to sleep," he says at last.

Hange doesn't follow him, doesn't call out his name.

This means that his words had worked.

But it doesn't make Levi feel better.

***

He heads straight into the dining hall, finding it blissfully empty. There a couple of drunkards, lying on the benches, clearly passed out. Levi doesn’t pay attention to them. Hopefully, he’ll soon join them.

He gets himself a bottle of wine and chugs it as quickly as he can. It tastes like piss, but he doesn’t care. He needs to forget, needs to get those big brown eyes out of his mind. They stare at him as soon as he closes his eyes. They judge him, as Hange’s voice whispers that he’s a liar and a coward. That he is the most despicable person in this world, if he dared to hurt her so.

But Levi doesn’t listen. He shakes his head and drinks more.

It wasn’t real, he tries to persuade himself. Hange doesn’t really feel this way about him. She was drunk and her husband left her on the night of their wedding. She was lonely and sad, of course, she tried to find comfort in someone else’s arms.

Hange doesn’t love him. He made the right choice.

She will probably forget about it in the morning, and everything will return to normal.

Levi lifts a bottle to his lips, hoping that if he drinks a little more, he’ll be able to ignore his broken heart.

***

In the morning, he feels like shit.

When a servant-boy starts banging on his door, shouting to him that King Erwin wants to see him, Levi starts feeling even worse.

But Erwin can’t know about yesterday’s accident, right? No matter how smart he is, there is no way he found out about that. Or, maybe, someone saw them in the hallway? It wasn’t like him or Hange paid much attention to their surroundings.

Shit, Levi thinks as he quickly puts his clothes on. What if Erwin really knows?

However, when Levi enters Erwin’s study, there is a surprisingly happy smile on his face. He chuckles, as he sees Levi’s annoyed and obviously tired face.

“I take it, you had fun last night?” Erwin asks.

Levi decides not to dignify this with a reply. Erwin really doesn’t want to know what kind of fun Levi was having last night. Instead, he takes a seat across from him. His anger considerably lessens, when he notices two cups with steaming tea. He immediately takes one in his hand, enjoying the warm substance as it runs down his throat.

“So,” Erwin puts a palm under his chin, looking at Levi with warm eyes. That damn pleased smile is still on his lips. It creeps Levi out. “The wedding was beautiful, don’t you think?”

“It was alright,” Levi shrugs. Your wife was beautiful, he thinks, as he takes another sip from his tea to avoid looking at Erwin.

“And how was the feast? Did you enjoy it?”

“If you’re so curious,” Levi scowls. “Maybe, you should have stayed for a little bit longer?”

Erwin chuckles. “I should have stayed longer, shouldn’t I?” he muses. “I hope Hange wasn’t too sad without me?”

“I…” Levi looks at him, feeling lost. How in the hell should he answer this?

“Well,” Erwin continues, seemingly not seeing Levi’s confusion. “I hope you were a good company for her.”

Shit, shit, fucking shit!

Levi narrows his eyes, eyeing Erwin carefully. The smile on his face is still easy and warm, and his gaze doesn’t seem suspicious or angry.

Maybe, just a coincidence?

Levi drinks from his cup, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible. “Is there a reason you called me today?” he makes his voice sound as calm as it is possible with his wildly beating heart. “Or did you simply want to discuss your wedding?”

“It’s been a long time, since we were able to just sit and chat, don’t you think? But,” Erwin straightens, as his gaze hardens just a fraction. Levi tenses. “You’re right, there is a reason why I called you here. I want to know what happened between you and Hange.”

If Levi was a bit clumsier, if his reflexes were a bit slower or if he didn’t know how to hide his emotions so well, he’d definitely drop the cup he’s holding. Or, maybe, he’d gasp or curse.

Instead he doesn’t even move, only raising an eyebrow, as he looks at Erwin with a calm expression. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Really?” Erwin looks at him incredulously. “You didn’t have a fight? Then why Hange said to me that she doesn’t want you to protect her anymore?”

Levi’s heart clenches painfully. Sure, he expected something like that, but actually hearing about it? It felt like his heart has broken for the second time.

“I… yeah, we had a fight, now I remember,” Levi says, feigning indifference. “But it was bound to happen, right? Hange and I are just incompatible, I guess.”

“Hm,” Erwin scratches his chin thoughtfully. “I thought you were getting along just fine. Even more than just fine.”

Erwin looks at him, open and honest. He knows, Levi realizes. Erwin knows. There are a dozen excuses on Levi’s tongue, but he doesn’t dare to say any of them out loud. Whatever he says, he won’t be able to fool Erwin.

“It’s my fault,” he admits, lowering his head. Levi knows what Kings do with cheating wives. Even if Erwin is nothing like different monarchs, adultery is a serious crime, and Levi can’t let Hange be punished for it. “I fell in love with her, but Hange doesn’t feel the same. She loves only you, Erwin.”

Unexpectedly, Erwin starts laughing. Levi stares at him, lost and confused.

“I’m sorry, sorry,” Erwin raises his hands in placating manner. “You two…” he shakes his hand, still chuckling. “You two are so worth each other. Hange told me the same thing, you know? When we had a similar conversation this morning, she kept telling me not to punish you and that you have no feelings for her…” Erwin sighs. “Just go and talk with her.”

Levi looks at Erwin, eyeing him beneath his fridge. “You… you are not angry?” he asks slowly. “But she is your wife!”

“She is,” Erwin agrees. “And Hange is a wonderful, phenomenal person. But I can’t be the husband she deserves. I can’t give her what she needs. She knew what she was signing up for, knew that it will be more of an alliance than a marriage, but still she agreed to it. And I’ll be forever grateful to her that she did. And if she found someone her heart is aching for, I can’t and won’t stop her. Talk with her,” Erwin softly repeats. “You both deserve to be happy.”

“Erwin…” Levi whispers, not quite knowing what to say.

“Go,” Erwin urges. “You can thank me later, when you sort it all out.”

Levi nods, standing up. Before he walks out of the room, he turns around and bows. “You’re the best king this country could ask for. It’s an honor to serve you…” Levi pauses, lifting the corners of his lips in a smile. “And it’s an even bigger honor to call you a friend.”

His conversation with Erwin made Levi feel that much better. Now as he wonders through the castle’s hallways, looking for Hange, he is filled with hope.

Maybe, there will be a happy ending to their story.

***

He finds Hange in the gardens. She's sitting on a bench near the fountains, Moblit, unsurprisingly, stands by her side. There is a book open on her lap, but it seems to be forgotten, as Hange is looking down on the flower in her hands.

Unnoticed by neither Moblit, nor Hange Levi stops, staring at Hange from afar.

Calling her pretty or fair would be wrong, Hange is neither of those things. Her nose is too long and curved, her forehead is too wide, and she does nothing to hide those imperfections.

However, as Levi keeps looking at her, he can't deny that he's admiring her. She may not be the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, but she catches his eye nonetheless. She may not be fairest of the fair, but to Levi, she is the most wonderful person in this world.

He takes a breath and then. He takes a step forward.

Moblit is the first one to see him. He instantly tenses, his eyes flaring up with anger. He lays a hand on the hill of his sword, stepping in to hide Hange behind his back.

And, yeah, Levi should have expected something like that. Moblit is fiercely loyal and absurdly over-protective, of course, he’d get angry at Levi for hurting his Lady.

“Lady Hange doesn’t require your protection anymore,” he declares, as he stares Levi down with righteous anger in his eyes.

Levi can’t help, but admit that he is impressed by Moblit. He must have seen Levi fight during his trainings or during the tournaments. And even if he hasn’t, he most surely has heard the tales about Levi’s skills. And he doesn’t like to brag, but he’s not called the mightiest of knights for nothing, yet Moblit… Moblit doesn’t seem to care about it. And he genuinely seems ready to fight with Levi, to defend his Lady’s honor with all of his strength.

Levi is glad that a man like him defends Hange.

“I just want to talk,” he says quietly.

Moblit continues to regard him with cold eyes until Hange steps in. She lays a hand on Moblit’s arm, smiling at him. It’s a weak smile, so different from her usual ones. Levi hates himself for it, hates that he is reason for the sad look on her face.

“I’ll be fine, Moblit, you can take a break for a while.”

For a moment, Moblit seems hesitant. His eyes dart from his Lady to Levi a couple of times, but then he gives up. He takes his hand off the sword and walks away.

“Thank you,” Levi murmurs, as he sits next to her. He doesn’t sit too close, but even so, when he lowers himself down, Hange slightly, but visibly tenses.

“Maybe, it’s for the best if we talk,” Hange muses, not taking her eyes off that flower. It’s a daffodil, Levi realizes. He briefly wonders, where Hange managed to find it in this time of year. The winter is approaching, after all. “I should apologize to you.”

“Hange, w—” but she doesn’t let him finish.

Instead, she continues, as though she didn’t even hear him. “You were right, it was a mistake. I shouldn’t have kissed you—”

“Hange—”

“I shouldn’t have forced myself onto you, it is obvious that you don’t feel the same—”

“Hange—”

“I’m sorry for making you uncomfortabl—”

“Hange!” Levi raises his voice and grabs her shoulder, turning her to face him. Now he has her undivided attention. Fucking finally. “I came here to talk with you. So,” he looks deeply in her eyes, as his hand lowers, until it is holding her palm. Hange tenses, but doesn’t try to shake him off. “Can I talk?”

Hange nods, timidly. She lowers her head, playing with that damned flower. Levi would have preferred for her to look at him, but well. Maybe, it’s for the best. At least, she won’t see him blushing and stuttering like a fool.

“You are right, you did make me uncomfortable,” immediately, Hange tries to free her hand, but Levi intertwines their fingers and doesn’t let go. “But it’s not the kiss that made me feel this way, o-or, maybe it is, no, wait, fuck!” Levi growls, distressed by his inability to translate his feelings into words. He was never good with either. “Shit, let me start over,” he ruffles his hair. “First, I want to… apologize. I know that I hurt you last night, but believe me I didn’t want this. I hope you can forgive m—”

“Levi,” Hange smiles. It’s a soft, but still disturbingly sad smile. It looks weird on her face. “You don’t have to apologize. I am the one at fault here—”

“For gods’ sake!” Levi exclaims. “Can you let me finish?”

“Oh, okay,” Hange chuckles, and Levi’s heart flutters at that sound. “Go on then.”

“As I was saying,” Levi begins, glaring at Hange. “Your actions made me uncomfortable, but more than that, my own feelings made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want you to stop, Hange. And, of fucking course, I didn’t want to push you away.”

“Then why did you?” and her voice is so quiet, so small and unsure that it breaks Levi’s heart.

“Because I thought it was wrong. Because I didn’t want to betray Erwin. Because I was afraid of my feelings to you.”

“And what exactly do you feel for me?”

Levi sighs. “Are you really going to make me say it?”

“It would make all of this much easier.”

And yeah, maybe, she’s right, Levi thinks. The lack of communication did bring them into this mess.

He sighs again. “I love you, Hange. More than anything.”

“I see,” Hange whispers, lowering her head. “So kissing you was really a mistake… I’m sorry, Levi, but I can’t… we can’t do that. I can’t give you everything. I am a Queen, I have a duty to this country, and… to my husband.”

“I know that. I also have a duty, and I don’t want your everything, Hange,” Levi lifts their joined hands and presses a soft kiss on her knuckles. “I don’t wish to own you, I… just want to love you and… remain by your side.”

Hange shakes her head, swiftly raising her free hand to wipe her face. “I really don’t deserve you.”

Levi smiles. “Stupid,” he says gently. “I told you yesterday, didn’t I? You deserve the world, Hange.”

Hange slowly lifts her palm to lay it on his cheek. Levi leans into her touch, and she smiles. “I love you so much, Levi.”

That smile is so soft and yet so bright. Levi wants nothing more than to press his lips to it. “I want to kiss you,” he blurts out.

Hange raises an eyebrow. “You won’t push me away this time?”

Levi scowls. “You really won’t let me forget it so easily?”

“Of course, not!” Hange exclaims. “You broke my heart, you know?”

“Well, I wasn’t too happy about it either,” Levi grumbles, even though he feels a prick of shame and regret. He won’t let himself harm Hange ever again.

“Lucky for you, I’m ready to forgive you. On one condition.”

“Which is?”

“You have to kiss me,” Hange grins. “Real good. So good it’ll make me swoon.”

“Swoon?” Levi scoffs. “Have you been reading too much shitty novels lately?”

“If you look at it this way…” Hange begins, her grin widening. “I am a Queen and you’re my trusty knight… We are just like the characters from those stories!”

“I’m not exactly your knight. Actually, when I came here, your trusty knight wanted to run me through with a sword!”

Hange shrugs. “It just means that our story is a bit different.”

“Do you think we’ll get a happy ending?”

“That depends. Remember, you have to kiss me really good!”

“You’re insufferable,” Levi grumbles.

But who he is to argue with his Queen? He has no choice, but to kiss her.

“Mm, that was… alright,” Hange declares, when they break apart. The dazed look in her eyes tells Levi a different story, but he decides to humor her.

“Just alright? Does that mean you won’t forgive me?”

Hange looks up, putting on a thoughtful expression. “That was our initial deal, yes, but,” she grins. “I’m a rather merciful Queen. I’ll let you have another try.”

“And if I won’t succeed again?”

“Then I’ll have no choice, but to train you.”

“Truly,” Levi smirks. “Your kindness knows no bounds.”

He lays his hand onto her waist, bringing Hange closer and kissing her once more. In that moment, he feels happier than ever.

Levi’s not the most optimistic person in the world, but when Hange smiles, he’s sure that their story is indeed different. It will have a happy ending.

#the first scene of this fic was in my drafts for months!#so thank you anon for finally making me finish it!#as you can see there was some plot here before but yeah i got too lazy #levihan #levihan fanfiction #levi x hange #levi x hanji #hange zoë #hanji zoe #levi ackerman #snk fanfiction #snk fandom #snk #levi aot #aot

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pjsblogs-dc · 4 years

Text

I hate this

Damian Wayne X Reader

Summary

Damian hates art show, but love you.

Warning

Death by embarrassment or fluff

Hard to say

~~~ Damian always hated art shows and charity parties that when with them. He would do everything in his power to skip or leave the party early. He hated the people, the clothes, and the popups attuite that came with the art shows but then he met you.

You were a young and naïve artist that just moved to Gotham, and just started working at an art center. He bumped into you as he was trying to sneak out, but quickly forget about it when he met your eyes and you quickly stumped out an apology.

You had the most beautiful eyes and an amazing smile.

The two of you just kept talking for the rest of the night about anything and everything. But the event was soon ending and for once Damian was disappointed that he had to leave.

“When will I see you again?” He asked as the two of you walked towards the parking lot. He didn’t want to stop talking to you, so he lied saying his car was in the parking lot just like you.

“Well,” you said pausing to think “the next art show is in a few weeks. I can text you the details.”

“Sounds great!” he said with a smile.

As you drove away he couldn’t believe that for once in his life he was excited to go the some stupid charity party. He couldn’t stop smiling even after he got into the limo that Alfred was driving.

“Your a little late, sir“ the butler said with a cocked eyebrow.

The younger Wayne was about to say something when he saw the time. He told Alfred he was going to sneak out at 11 pm, but it was 2 am. Not only was he three hours late but he also missed his patrol shift.

“I got a little tied up.“ Damian said defensibly.

“That is want Master Dick said all the time when hung out with members of the opposite sex at charity events.“ Alfred said as he drove away from the art show.

Damian wanted to say something back but thought better of it. He knew he was going to get an earful from the team when he got back home and didn’t want it to start now. Pulling out his phone to see if you had texted him information of the next show, he also looked at the roster of events the boys had to go to.

Long ago to save a head ache, Bruce came up with an assignment system for who has to go to what events, it was to keep the peace in the house and work around patrols schedules, but truth be told it was a tool that the boys where threatened with if they didn’t get along.

No one in the Wayne house like going to Charity events for the same reasons Damian didn’t like going but that was going to change.

~~~

No one at the Wayne house really noticed at first, that Damian was trying to get more charity events. Or that the shows were most with or hosted by Peterson Art Charity. None of them wanted to go so they were happy to listen to his poor excuse and give him the event. It wasn’t until Bruce called them all in did they see what was going on.

“What the hell you guys?“ Bruce said to the three Wayne boys, “Why is Damian going to all the events? I thought we had a deal.”

“We did,“ Dick said.

“Yea but Damian said something about need that day blah,blah, lame excuse.” Jason said dismissably, “All I know is that is instead of dealing with stuck up brats, I got to patrol and I beat up some bad guys.”

“Lol same,“ Tim said with a smile, ”I tried to give him all my days but he only want somedays. Hell he even offer to double up and do the later patrol shift so that I didn’t say anything.“

“He did the same thing for me to,“ Dick said.

“Is the little Demon ditching them and blaming it on us?“ Jason said “Because if that the case-“

“No, he isn’t.“ Bruce said, signing, “I just wanted to know why all I see in the social column is Damian and his alleged girlfriend, and not any of you and your alleged girlfriends.“

“You check the social column?“ Tim said with confusion, “Why would you do that to yourself?”

“To see what the hell you guys did this week to piss off the press.“

“I know what we can do!“ Dick said.

“I alright don’t like this,“ Bruce said putting is head in his hands.

~~~~

Damian hated ever minute of the social part he had to do before he saw you. Smile and nodded to the racist old lady opinion on the world. Pretend to listen to some old guy talk about the stock market. Dance with the girls that only wanted his money. But when he saw you the world stopped, and it didn’t matter that he had a stupid suit or painful shoes, what matter was the time you to spent together.

He didn’t what you dragged into the fire storm that is the social gossip world because the two of you where seen outside of the charity events. And if someone snapped a picture of them together he always placed and anonymous phone call the next day saying he saw Damian kissing some high society girl which broke the news for the next week or two.

You didn’t seem to mind. You were so focused on your art that you couldn’t really met expect for at events. Plus you really didn’t watch or read the news so you didn’t know that the guy you where hanging out with was a Wayne. You were just happy to see him at all your shows or events, and always like the fact you had someone to talk to that wasn’t someone from work or a snooty art person saying that your art was bad.

The two of you had just saw each other when the door to the event swung out, showing something Damian hated more than a stupid art show.

A stupid art show with his family.

All of his brothers and sisters was here dress to the nines in gowns and suit, but his father stole the show with Selina Kyle on his arm and in a kickass suit. Everyone is the room was taken aback by their sudden appears and marveled at how good they look, but Damian almost shit himself.

He didn’t need to be super close to his father to see the look in his eyes.

It was his Batman eyes, meaning he was on a mission, and Damian didn’t need to think super hard why he or his family was here.

“I can’t believe the Waynes are here,“ a small voice said causing Damian to almost lose it.

That voice was you.

You looked amazing and he almost got lost in you smile, but he mental smacked himself. He need a plan and quick otherwise he was going to get embarrassed in front of you and he didn’t want that.

“Did you do all you socially thingys for work?“ you asked.

“Yep,“ Damian said turning his back to his family. Hoping the wouldn’t see him.

“Come on then!“ you said with a smile, and grabbed his hand causing him to blush. “I have something to show you.“

Damian forgot about his family and let you drag him away from the main hallway and into a small side room. He knew where he was going before you even took him there.

All the famous artist where in the main hall and all the lesser know was in side rooms. He was getting taken to a side room with your art. You were talking ecstatically about your art.

Apparently some anonymous person had bought all your art before the show even started. Damian smiled to himself, proud that he had caused you such glee.

“But that doesn’t matter“ you kept rambling on as the two of you stop in front of a piece of art. “What do you think?“

It was a beautiful piece of a man and a woman under a lamp light in the middle of a city. The two of them where holding hands and kissing, and Damian was at a lost for words.

“I don’t know what to say,“ he whispered.

“How about thank you?“ you said shyly.

Damian turned to you in confusion. You were blushing and not looking at him.

“What do you mean?“

“Well . . .I. . .umm.. ..aaa made it for you.“ you quickly whispered still not looking at him.

Damian reach out and lightly turned you face towards him.

“Say that again, my love.“

Now you were a bright shade of red and still not meeting his eyes but you said it again, but this time a little louder.

“I made it for you.“

“You didn’t have to.“ Damian said matching your voice level.

“Well you always say you want a piece but whenever I have a show all the art is sold before you ever get one, so I told the studio that all of them but this one is for sale because it saw going to go to you.“ You spoke so fast and all at once. Damian that it was cute when you got all fluster but he knew that if he didn’t stop you would have keep rambling until you ran out of breath. Damian politely cut you cut by putting one finger on your lips.

“It beautiful and I love it Y/N, but I have a confession to make.“

“You do?“ you said looking up at his with your mesmerizing (eye color) eyes. Damian got lost for a second but tried to quickly recovered.

“I. . .umm.. .aa. . .“

“What is it?“ you looked worried but before Damian could say something, someone else chimed in.

“Yea, Damian,“ a voice said “What is it?“

Never had Damian been filled with more rage then at that second.

The two of you looked up to see Dick, Jason, and Tim lending in on the door way. They had a smug ass look at Damian wanted to punch right off their face.

“Get the hell out of here“ Damian said through gritted teeth, shooting dagger at his brothers.

“Well that would be rude!“ Dick said as he and his brother walked over toward you. “We haven’t even introduced our selves.“

Dick forced himself between the two of you to “shake your hand” but Damian knew it was to piss him off.

“I’m Dick, Damian’s older brother, other there is his other brother Jason,“

Jason waved.

“and his other other brother Tim.“

“Pleasure.“ Tim said taking you hand and kissing it.

You give Damian a weird look.

“You’re related to the Wayne Men.“

“Oh he didn’t tell you that.“ Jason said with a smile as he wrapped his arm around Damian’s neck. “That doesn’t sound like our little Damian.”

“Not at all!“ Tim said with crooked smile.

Damian wanted to kill them all but Dick opened his mouth.

“Well I know something that our little Damian would do!“ Dick said with a smile “He would have told you that he keeps buying all of your art and hanging it in his apartment.“

“When did you go to my apartment!“ Damian snapped.

“On the way over!“ Tim said in a manner of fact voice, and he turned back to you, “And may I say what beautiful pieces they are. I wish Damian would let the world see them.“

“I am going to kill the three of you.“ Damian growled.

“Now, now, Damian!“ Jason said “Didn’t I teach you better than to plan a murder out loud.“

Damian was so beyond done with his brothers bullshit and was about to cruse them out when he saw you straighten up and someone clear their voice.

“Evening, sons“ Bruce said, causing the older boys to jump apart.

Bruce was by himself with a glass of champagne. On the outside he looked like to cool, laid back playboy the media saw but Damian could tell by way he was standing that he was in a mood.

“Hi, Bruce,“ they all said, expect Damian.

“Father.” he said curtly.

“Damian,” Bruce said looking at his son with a cocked eyebrow. “You know we were all going to this party tonight, right? You didn’t need to drive yourself down here tonight, we were waiting for you at your apartment for an hour.”

No, he didn’t know that, but he knew that Bruce was lying about that last part. They had search his apartment not doubt and figured out where he was and decided to make a scene.

“I’m so sorry, Father,“ Damian said matching his fathers gaze. “I didn’t know.“

Bruce signed and looked at his older sons. They were trying their hardest not to do anything draw attention, but they were doing a bad job. They were shooting knowing looks and giggling.

“Got out of here and stop annoying you brother.“ Bruce said putting his face in his hand. The three of them ran out laughing like school boys, leaving Bruce with and annoyed looked.

He turned towards you and took your hand.

“I don’t believe we have been properly introduced. My name is Bruce Wayne, I’m Damian’s father.“ Bruce said and kissed you hand.

You just stood and started at him, speechless. It took a minute before you spoke, and when you did Damian wanted to die.

“I see,“ you said in a high breathless voice, causing Bruce to raise an eyebrow.

There was another awkward pause before you realized you were supposed to say your name, but instead you rambled.

“Oh, yes... umm... I’m so sorry, I was thinking. It just kind of happened all at once. I am still trying to understand what exactly is-”

Damian moved quietly next to you and grabbed your hand, and spoke for you.

“Y/N,” Damian said in a confident voice meant to tell his father to back down and to help calm you down. “They are a pretty amazing artist, and the person I love.“

Bruce looked at you and then to his son and gave a soft smile.

“Well, it is nice to have finally have met you, Y/N,“ Bruce said “I hope to see you at the manor sometime soon.“

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tt205 · 4 years

Text

UNCONDITIONALLY

LAN XICHEN x READER

Summary: Your somewhat boyish behavior always bothered many , especially now whole of Gusu Lan Clan was pissed with you . Sharing feelings with Lan Xichen is something that brought you quite close this days . Will love be enough to cover up all of your 'flaws' ?

Requested? : YES by rozesdanze and I'm apologizing again for this late upload .

WARNINGS: minor cursing, low self esteem , slight bullying nothing that may trigger you too much .

Words count : 3.440

•---------•---------••---------•---------••---------•---------•

You always were a free spirited person , not caring much about what everyone gotta say and just minding your own business while offering a helping hand where it was needed .

It was your nature , something you couldn't change.

Sometimes people told you to be more "feminine " or "act like a girl of your age " your somewhat boyish behavior bothering them .

You didn't mind it at all .

You grew up with only male friends except for Jiang Yanli and that's why you have adopted this 'strange for a girl ' behavior .

Everything was fine until you entered The Gusu Lan Clan Sect's area in the Cloud Recesses.

Your not so much disciplined ways of living bothered Lan Qiren and the rest of the ladies , that were supposed to be studying there and not gossip around .

It firstly started as comments now and then " dress like a girl " " style your hair like a girl " " why are you not wearing your hairpins ?" And such .

You brushed off the first couple of weeks but when the whole student community started making fun of you , you couldn't take it any more .

Your pride was indeed hurt .

If Wei Wuxian wasn't there you would have left this hell of a place and return back in Yumeng Clan, your hometown.

He was supportive as always , reassuring you that everything was fine with you and that you didn't have to change yourself in order to be accepted by others .

Your own self is what makes you unique.

If someone doesn't likes your real self then they dont deserve being with you .

•---------•---------••---------•---------••---------•---------•

You passed through the hallways trying to get in class when a group of so-good-for-nothing girls blocked your way .

A short girl two years older than you spoke first with this high pitched voice that make you want to slap her straight in the face "oh y/n I pity you so much .. how will you be able to find a good match in the future with such a poor manner set ? Tsts" she chuckled making your eyes go wide at her rudeness.

"I'm sure I will have more possibilities to find one than you .. I may not have the good manners you are claiming to have yourself but at least i am not rude with people i know nothing about " you answer her back bowing your head and trying to move through them .

"Move !" You ordered one of her side chicks Ling the stupid one .

" Oh my goodness.. this is not a way a lady should talk to another y/n " another one of her bitches talked.

You glared at her trying to push Ling to the side.

" why are you even talking to her Feng ? She cant even walk in a proper way yet not even get dressed up as a lady of her status she is a waste of time .. better let her become a puppet of her stupid friend the Yiling Patriarch-- "

"If you ever curse on Wei Wuxian in front of me I ll make sure to shut your mouth with my fist ! He is not making puppets to your information he is just controlling the Yin iron with skills you wish you could have ! Now move out of my sight !" You tell them totally pissed of .. you grab your sword case trying to put some sense in them but they dont seem to mind

" Stupid bitch no one will ever love you in this way ! Every one will pity your for being an unmarried pathetic bitch! In the end even your own family will abandon you - oh I forgot you've got none! " She curses at you and you feel like something is twisted to your core .

2 thing are what you hate the most 1. having people pitying you or telling you that they do and 2. People talking about your family .

That's it , before giving it a second thought you uncover your cased sword harshly .

You move it to your untied hair grabbing a fistful of them before moving the blade on them.

" 1st of all you are not even in the place to think about my family lowly peasant! Do you think that no one in here knows about your relationship with an already married man? " you ask her and she widens her eyes .

"secondly this is for you ! I'm a woman of my status and none my hair , clothing or manners can prove it otherwise! At least I'm not someone's slut!" You close your eyes before moving the blade in one sift motion and cutting half of your hair's length shortening it to shoulder's length.

"Now fuck off and don't dare to look at my direction again emptyheaded bitch!" You scream at her throwing all the hair on her face before making your way back to your room .

•---------•---------••---------•---------••---------•---------•

3 hours have passed since the incident and no one has reached for you yet .

"Good" you thought, because reconsidering your action you've broken more that 6 of Gusu lan clan's rules and show disrespect to your rank status by cutting your hair .

Before realizing it you heard someone knocking on your door "shit" you cursed in your brain , moving to the doorframe and opening the door only to come face to face with the Clan-leader-to-be Lan Xichen.

You bowed your head , forcing a smile on as you rubbed your hands together to sooth your embarrassment, way too shy to look your 'crush' to the eyes .

"Greeetings Zewu Jun " you said moving aside and making room for him to enter .

"Lan Qiren asked me to bring you to him" he said the smile that always hugged his features non apparent anymore.

"Your uncle?" You asked wishing to get a 'no' as an answer..

"Unfortunately yes !" He said looking down the floor .

After putting on your cloaks , you both made your way out of your room and moved to Lan Qiren's residence.

After a really long chat with him you were free to go NOT REALLY .

He asked Xichen to take you himself to the library in order to make 1.500 copies of the latest book he bought this year.

You sighed again in the thought of the pain your arm will have after finishing this task , only to earn one of Xichen's concerned glances .

•---------•---------••---------•---------••---------•---------•

As soon as seating down to your used by many times spot , you grabbed the pen and deeped it into the new-cut ink .

5 hours passed since you first started copying books and despite having nothing actually to do xichen seemed rather occupied.

You gave him a questionable look as you leaned your head in your hands looking to his place .

"You knew that this was going to put you in trouble y/n , why doing such a thing just to prove them wrong?" You raised your head upon hearing this words leaving Xichen's mouth , not formality in them , just casual talking.

" they have been getting on my nerves for more than 2 months I couldn't bear it -" you tried to explain yourself but he interrupted you

" You could have just come to me right from the beginning!" He looked pissed and you sifted in you seat shivering from the tone in his voice .

This man surely had some nerve in him, being more than a head taller than you was something that from the very start make it clear that you could better not get in any trouble with him .

Seeing his genuine and kind nature made you loose down your walls , allowing your heart to form feelings for him and now you are here unable to form a single word without stuttering in between.

" Y/n ? Cant you see it ?" He asked and you gave him a confused face in defense .

"What do you mean-?"

" I - i do care about you y/n , watching the others making your life a living hell including my uncle drives me crazy ! I tried so many times to show you how i feel about you just to give you a shelter, a safe place but you are not getting it " he sighed to himself clearly frustrated.

He removed a strand of hair out of his face looking to your not so calm face that was by now painted in a really deep shade of read .

Being the lil tease he secretly is , he wanted to get you even more freaked out by little .

He looked into your eyes with this calm face of his while saying " I love you y/n " and then returning to his desk and grabbing back his pen .

" I love you too " you said loud enough to even have the bunnies hear too outside , the silence inside the room making an echo to your voice .

In quick realization you moved your palm to your mouth clapping it fast and shutting down the curses about your stupidity that were ready to spill out .

" What ?" He asked in a teasing tone lifting his body higher and then sitting up completely moving to your place until he was studying right in front of you hovering some heads above you and then repeating then same question calmly.

This drove you crazy .

" How can a person be so calm in a situation like that ? " you screamed out loud mostly to yourself before reaching in front you and pinching the skin of his lower thigh .

You looked up to his face as he let out a high peached scream of pain "Lan Xichen you are driving me insane!"

You pinched him again with both hands now only to have him beg to be left in peace "Please y/n don't do this ! " he half laughed half screamed for the poor skin of his legs before reaching down and grabbing both your wrists once you didn't stop after his begs.

You squirmed in his grip before he moved both wrists to his lips , kissing the skin there and putting them back down the surface of your desk .

Your mouth was hanging open , such a big skin contact all of sudden leaving you shooked.

" I have done 14 copies of the book you are copying.. I'm taking a break for now but I'm returning back in 15 minutes straight! You continue your work little girl " he said before blinking his eye to you and moving out of the library .

"Excuse me ?! " you screamed as loud as you could looking both to your wrists and his distant form .

"This man is gonna drive me crazy sooner than I thought " you told yourself before returning to your work .

•---------•---------••---------•---------••---------•---------•

It's been 4 days since you started dealing with your punishment and you already have 276 copies ready to go but way more many on the way .

Today is a special day for Gusu lan Clan and it's students so it's the perfect opportunity for you to take a break tonight.

Gusu Lan Clan's biggest has come and you are now getting ready to attention the lantern festival with Wei Wuxian been apart for so many days making you miss him to death .

A sudden knock on the door made you jump on your spot .

Waiting for Wuxian you opened without asking for the person outside.

To your huge surprise there was not Wei Wuxian but Lan Xichen .

" I'm allowed to go in the festival today ! I asked your uncle this morning! You cannot keep me here- " you rushed to say to afraid of loosing your only chance out .

" I'm here to take you out myself so that you can return to the library straight after the ceremony finishes , my uncle has no intention searching for you so he sent me to make sure that there will be no way for you to sneak out " he said calmly giving you a teasing smile .

You looked around searching for Wei Wuxian but there you found him next to Lan Wangji holding a paper lantern together.

You giggled at the view of Wuxian's flashed cheeks when his hand touched Wangji's accidentally.

The moment when all of the lighting lanterns had to fly to the sky arrived so you moved to catch the one in front of you but regretted it at the sight of Xichen doing the same .

You felt shy at your silly mistake don't understanding that the lantern wasn't for you but for him and you bowed in discomfort cursing to yourself for making you look even more stupid to him .. your fucking crush .

" I think this is for the both of us y/n " he told you taking your hands in his making you catch some part of the paper .

" Every one can make a wish as their lantern will make their way up ! I'm sure that each and every wish of yours will be fulfilled in the near future and luck will always saw a good face to you and your loved ones ! This year was one of educational progress, health and wisdom. I hope that all of you will follow the path we Gusu Lan Clan taught you about , a path of righteousness, fairness and virtue. Now I'll count up to 5 so all of you will have to prepare your lanterns! " Lan Qiren announced making you look around for some fire to put in the light .

"One" he started

"Two" the lantern was ready to go so you thought about making a wish

" I wish y/n would give me a chance to prove my sincere feelings for her while living and following the path of the good , avoiding the sinful road and having zero regrets. " the man next to you whispered mostly to himself with closed eyes as he hold onto your lantern tightly.

Your eyes blinked twice the having the man you wish to call yours one day admitting his feelings again .

" I wish I'll become a woman of my status so I can let myself be loved by the man I love without minding if I'll ruin his reputation with my inappropriate image " you whispered to both to him and to yourself, admitting how you really felt with this complicated situation .

You didn't want to change yourself, no not at all, but you just hopped the time could change you into what you could call ideal woman , wife , without feeling much pain in the progress.

It was true , him loving you would ruin his and the Gusu Lan Clan's reputation .

The future Clan Leader having feelings for a punk?

A girl with no manners?

Without a family and depending only on Yumeng Sect and her uncle ?

Sometimes you wished you were different, somewhat like your cousin Yanli but no , in the end you wouldn't be you , you would be someone fake .

You would be someone even more miserable.

You are clearly confused by now .

Shall I change and become what the world around me wants to or be myself and let them talk shit without minding a bit ?

The 1st one is the easy way , but the 2nd one is what will make you struggle but be you at the very last .

"Three " Lan Qiren spoke as you tried to regain your composure and focus .

"Four " all of the disciplines lifted their lanterns up readying them once more .

"Y/n would you like to be the person I call home from now on ?" Xichen asked you .

"I can't-"

" Yes you can ! If there is love in between everything can be worked out !" He cut you

" Is there any love from your side y/n ?" He asked you and you didn't want a second more to know the answer

"Yes there is "

" See ? There is no reason you can't let me love you , call you mine , make you the person I want to return after the storm . I want to be the person you need , you love , I want to be your everything, would you allow me to do that ? "

" Don't you mind I'm who I am ? "

"Five! Let them go and fly high " Lan Qiren called and you did as you were told

"No , I don't . I love you for who you really are y/n not for who I want you to be " Xichen said making you look down the floor to afraid to be loved but at the same time loose who you really love .

"I really like you , no I can say that I love you , everything you do . And all I want is to protect and take you home with me .

Will you come and live in Gusu with me ?

I wanna be with you forever and even though it's really early to say would you like to marry me one day ?

I'm sure that even though you are not my uncle's favorite person out there he will accept the fact that we want to be together.

We can call your uncle to come and set a marriage for us in the years to follow .

I will give you as much time as you feel like taking but I want to make my feelings clear to you from the very beginning.

Would you like to marry me and be the next Gusu Lan Clan's Leader wife ? " he asked always to rushed as his cheeks took a red color painting his pale skin .

"Yes I would love to ! Even if i could marry every man on earth you would be my one and only choice in every lifetime and every dimension I could live , I would choose you again"

You answer him with a little smile in the end as both of you hugged gaining glares from all the people around you .

" Does this mean that we are official?" He asked

"I guess so " you told his hiding you face in his strong torso .

" FELLOW HUMANS IM GETTING MARRIED TO MY BELOVED Y/N I WISH YOU ALL CAN MAKE IT TO OUR MARRIAGE IN THE NEAR FUTURE !" He screamed making you punch him lightly in his lower abdomen as he fake screamed in pain .

" That means that we will be siblings by law y/n?" Wuxian asked while jumping his way to your derection happily

" What do you mean A-Xian?" You asked confused .

" We are getting married too brother !" Lan Wangji said as both yours and Xichen's jaw dropped open .

" Congratulations!" Both of you screamed out loud as you went hugging them .

The four of you hugged while jumping together but then there he came Jiang Cheng.

" That means I'm the only single bird rn? Thanks guys thanks!" He said while glaring at you four .

" No you are not sweetheart!" Nie Huaisang appeared giving Cheng a misiviews smile before hiding his now flashed cheeks behind his fan .

" BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME THAT I'M THAT DESPERATE! I BETTER BE PUNCHED IN THE FACE BY WEN QING AGAIN RATHER THAN DATING YOU ! " Jiang Cheng screamed in Huiesung's face before storming away in order to search for his short tempered other half Wen Qing .

" There we go again " Wuxian said

" Yes there we go again " you added and the four of you started laughing until tears formed in your eyes and too little oxygen was making it's way into your lungs.

This is the best feeling.

Be with people that you love and love you ,

Without loosing faith in you ,

Without wanting to make you someone else ,

Without wanting to control you

People that love you unconditionally.

————————————————————————————

Please follow & like for more content!

Stay happy & healthy ♡

Be yourself + love yourself.

Hope you enjoyed reading

#the untamed imagines #zewu jun #lan xicehn #gusu lan #lan xichen #lan zhan #lan wangji #requests open #x reader #mo dao su zhi #the untamed #nie huaisang #jiang sect #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #yunmeng jiang #wei wuxian #wei ying

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whatiswhump · 4 years

Text

I thought that- Chapter 1

Hi hi! So I haven’t had any motivation to write lately But I did just reread a 50 page story that I wrote six years ago and I was pleasantly surprised with it. I think I will publish it in a series of chapters. It is a departure from my usual writing style and the beginning is more humorous and sardonic than anything (in fact I find the first chapter to be pretty cringey) but if you’re at all interested, I recommend sticking it out for the whump to come... because not only does the writing get much much better but it gets..... dark™

CW: suicidal ideation, death, attempted suicide

P.S. please let me know what you think! I love comments!

I thought that when I finally died, it would be more remarkable than all of my other experiences. I’d come close countless times before but I thought that it be more. I guess I was wrong. Because that night, nothing felt different, nothing was remarkable. I didn’t die like Erin, in a messy tragic fashion. I didn’t die like my dad in a drawn out scraping sort of way. Instead, I was alive and then I wasn’t. Executed before I even knew what was happening. What a fucking bummer.

The night was deep, so deep that I felt as if I could walk into it and it would never end. The water washed against the shore like india ink and the fog threatened to entirely swallow me. I held an old flashlight that flickered in my bruised hand and waited. I was feeling more patient than usual that night actually. Too bad death didn’t feel the same. The fog felt like cotton in my ears and I was fairly content to let my mind wander in the peacefulness while waiting for the shipment to arrive. I was thinking of Erin in her blue dress on the day that she led me away from the picnic and we slept in the wildflowers. I almost felt the sun on my fingertips when the trigger was pulled. By then I was dead. One moment, Erin was in my head and the next, a bullet was instead.

Unluckily for me, the day I died so unceremoniously was not even my last.

Waking up in a morgue is an experience I would not wish upon anyone. Particularly confusing not to mention just exceptionally creepy. Plus being hit from behind is not what one needs after they've been shot in the back of the head at close range. But I don’t blame the mortician. He was only doing his job when I scared the living fuck out of him.

I didn’t care to be alive again once I knew I had died. The man that showed up and dragged me out of the basement of the hospital was particularly annoyed that I didn’t appreciate my newest chance at life. He was especially not happy when I jumped in front of a bus directly outside of my resurrecting place.

Hospital security officers and the odd off-duty medical personnel witnessed said unstable behavior and I was immediately whisked away from the mystery gentlemen and back into the hospital where I was provided with bed restraints. I admit it wasn’t my best plan of action, but I was feeling desperation in the way that people do when they try to bargain for another day to live.

So for the third time in twenty four hours people had control of me in ways I did not wish them too. I suppose I didn’t wish to die but I didn’t want to live again now that the proverbial trigger had been pulled and I certainly didn’t relish being a mental patient. I lay in the bed and looked out the gated window in silence when they first hauled me up there. When I didn’t feel like talking to a doctor and quite possibly a little hostile, they injected something that felt like syrup in my veins. Despite my better (sober) judgement, I started yelling about being resurrected and that ordeal. It was at least a more immediate route into a drug induced sleep.

When I opened my eyes I was dismayed to see the fellow with the grey hair again. His face was directly above mine and the first thing I groaned, “fuck”.

He snickered a bit at my friendly greeting and next thing I knew I was dizzy and I was sticking my feet in the way of the doorways we went through at what felt racing speed in a wheelchair.

“Your name’s John.” I slurred and tried to look back at the stranger maniac.

“Yes, and you’re Clarence.”

“Spot on!” I cheered in my drug induced glee.

“Now do me a favor Clarence. Number one: stop sticking your feet in the way of doorways and number two: stop trying to die. You make my job very difficult.”

“Sure, sure, whatever you say,” I started as I began to close my eyes and then I remembered the revival and took immediate action in the best way I knew at the moment.

“Dammit Clarence!” He hissed at me under his breath as he lifted me back into the wheelchair.

I was not as fast at running as my plan required, nor as capable of getting up off the floor as I assumed I would be.

The commotion of me flinging myself off of quickly moving wheelchairs made enough noise to invite a few people to the hallway. I looked behind me for Mystery John but he had vanished. I tried to explain myself. I don’t think I did it very well.

There was a prick in my arm and radio silence fell over my battered brain again.

The next time I surfaced, there were two men in suits staring down at me.

“Um hello?” I said when I realized they weren’t going to speak first.

“Clarence Granger, correct?”

I cracked a coy smile and responded in a manner that didn’t seem appreciated. “May I know who is asking?”

The speaking man’s partner sighed in exasperation. He clearly didn’t want to be interacting with me.

“The FBI. Sound familiar?”

I nodded my head and then tried to conceal an involuntary wince. It still hurt.

“Clarence, we are here because yesterday we found what we presumed to be your corpse on the shore of the Atlantic Sound. You had been shot in the back of the head, point blank. We were investigating further into your murder when we received a phone call. Apparently a very spooked mortician said you weren’t very dead at all and what was a bullet wound on your skull was a mere scar. You were reportedly kidnapped and then proceeded to jump in the way of a bus right out front? Now you’re in the suicidal wing of the hospital?”

“Can you explain any of this?!” The impatient one interjected with a wave of his hands.

I’ll admit it did sound a little odd. I can attest to being dead… and to being alive.

“This isn’t the answer you guys are looking for, but…. No.” I just tried to give a little defeatist wave of my hands but it wasn’t complete with the restraints.

Mr. Impatient squinted at me for a moment and then turned and walked a few steps away, “Great! Just great! The crazy one doesn’t even know why he is no longer murdered! We saw the bullet wound! He was cold. Stone cold. As dead as they come! You were an ugly corpse!”

“Garrett, Garrett. Let’s just do our jobs alright?” Mr. Even-keel-in-the-face-of-crazy, er, Mr. Even-keel looked at me then and whispered, “Pardon, just a moment.”

“Where am I going to go?” I responded amiably as I rattled the restraints.

He led Mr. Impatient to the corner and there was a little bit of whisper arguing, Then Mr. Impatient straightened his already straight suit jacket with a hough and strode back over.

“Hey guys, guys, could you maybe get these undone?” I gave my wrist and ankles another shake and produced a stupid smile, “I promise I’m not crazy.”

Mr. Impatient’s mouth gaped a little before he remembered to respond, “Did you not just hear everything we just said? Fat chance.”

“What he means to say is that we don’t have control over that, that’s the hospital. Maybe after we finish speaking I can talk to them.”

“Well okay, just thought it would be the decent thing to do, guys. It’s hard to feel comfortable talking to you with them on!”

“Can we just get back to the matter?” Mr. Impatient fumed.

I shrugged my shoulders, “I’d like that.”

“Okay, what do you remember from that night?”

“Nothing.” (That’s not true.)

(But why would I tell them? I was up to illegal activities!) (See, I can be Mr. Even-keel too.)

“Who do you know that would target you?”

“Mmm.. no one.” (a lie)

“Who kidnapped you from the morgue?”

“No idea.” (All I know is that he is a maniac named John)

“Alright. Why did you jump in front of a bus.”

“Oh I know the answer to this one, I didn’t see the bus before I walked into the street, funny story, really, on that part-”

“There were ten witnesses that said they heard you yell at a man that you didn’t want to live and that you were going to jump in front of the bus.”

“Oh. Did they say that? Are you sure they heard right?”

“Look kid, are you gonna answer straight or not? You’re wasting our time.”

Wow, Mr. Impatient, that was a little rude.

From there on out I decided not to speak again. I’d talk when somebody let me off the bed or at the very least brought me a poptart.

At one point Mr. Impatient grabbed my collar in frustration but Mr. Even-keel cooled him off. I wonder if Mr. Impatient’s wife cheated on him last night? I would if I were her. Honestly I think he should really pick up his attitude. That’s better than being murdered and unwillfully resurrected. Get some perspective, pal.

So. After they left a lot more pissed off than when they had arrived I did a little extra curricular activity and picked my way out of the locks. The only problem was the hallway did happen to actually have a lot of staff members in it and I didn’t get far. Some buff guys in tight white kindly escorted me to a new room with no furniture but really plush walls. Oh. And I started talking about being resurrected again because of another shot to get me there... I may or may have not throw a few elbows at first. I don’t think it really helped my ‘I’m-not-crazy’ case.

So. Yeah. This week was already fucked and it was only Tuesday.

#clarence #clarence granger #oc #my oc #whatiswhump #ressurection #psychiatric whump #i thought that-#series #chapter 1

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oldtimesart · 4 years

Note

sure, i don’t care that much if you disagree, but typing up paragraphs full of ranting behind someones back is really immature and does not make you look good.

HO BOY HO BOY ,MY FIRST ...anon hate??? I DONT KNOW WHAT IS BUT AM EXCITED , and also confuse....like:

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHT?? behind WHO'S BACK??? what ranting ??? Inmature?? if you dont care why did you bother on sending me this???

Hum??? SO YOU CALLING ME INMATURE AND SEND IT AS ANNON INSTEAD OF asking permition to a stranger to discuss a matter that you might find troublesome for you IN PERSON??? or IS IT that You can't cause i got You blocked???

BRO ,i have like, 4 people blocked and one of them is a pedo PFFFFFFFFFFFF

Here let me share you what one of My Friends just told me....ejem...........

and I quote

“You’re in your own profile and you’re free to do rants if you want If they have a problem is theirs, not yours”

Ma dude, youre a human being, you are on your right to think wathever you want, HOWEVER am gonna say :

youtube

By the way ,youre in a place where people have LITERALLY BLOGS JUST TO VENT AND RANT, if you dont like them ,IS TOTALLLY FINE, no one is making you watch them, in fact, i dont know why you chose to lose time whit my blog? dude the BLOCK button isnt an ornament, it have a purpose

USE IT

NOBODY CARES ABOUT OTHERS PEOPLE RANTS UNLESS THEY FEEL CONECTED, AND EVEN THEN, WELP

I know well that ANYONE can see my blog, even people i block and i dont care, I LITERALLY GIVING ADVICES ON HOW TO NOT SCREW FRIEDNSHIPS LIKE ME, because people chose to lose friends over stupid things, language barriers and because theyre stupidly proud which is sad, and IS OKEY CAUSE YOURE A GODAM HUMAN ,not fuking perfection exist, you can also rant in public if you want or give free advices, IS UP TO THE PEOPLE IF THEY WANT OR NOT TO LISTEN ,but you actually dont have any right to tell a person TO NOT RANT ON THEIR OWN BLOG!! and if it makes them look bad , THEN LET THEM LOOK BAD ,people aint stupid dude, they know to keep away from people that isnt nice or good for them, youre not responsable of OTHER peoples image, you dont own their blogs, you dont have any power over them, it doesnt matter if the person you think is INMATURE or they have the most pure post or the most evilish ones, youre no one to tell a person what they can or cant post on their OWN DAM BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOGS

by the way, YOU THINK UR FRIENDS DOESNT TALK BEHIND YOUR BACK????!!! ma dude there is not godam person in this world who havent done it, intentional or unintentional, but i dont know behind whose back you think am talking unless you know the person am talking about which

I 👏

HAVENT 👏

TALK 👏

AT 👏

ALL 👏

BTW, your message is rude because you felt the need to tell a stranger, even though you didn't have to and you could have walk away, cause i dont know in wich planet you think this is seen as being nice and whit manners, remember that you chose not to walk away, and since you dont care ,welp you wont care for this reply either so

however i apreciate the attention sweety, i am conscious of the consequences of my actions, but am also conscious that is my blog and i can post wathever i want, i hope you find peace on wathever you chose to do and stop looking at blogs that make you uncomfortable, thats not healthy and it only hurts you, because the other person doesnt give a dam and thinking that you have any right to tell the people what to do whit their blogs does not make you look good when you could just ignore them and be happy

BUT sure, i don’t care that much if you disagree

#mental health #rant #toxic friendship #toxic positivity #healing #selfcare #loveyourself #silly post #mental heath support

10 notes · View notes

sabineelectricheart · 4 years

Text

Past Premises

Summary: Sylvain has a strict view of the world. His professor challenges it.

Rating: T - Suitable for teens, 13 years and older, with some violence, minor coarse language, and minor suggestive adult themes.

Words: 4600

Notes: It turned out to be quite long, but I find I like it. I hope you do, too.

Sylvain Gautier said he would never trust anyone because humans were self-serving and fundamentally flawed in all capacities.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

Truth be told, the nobleman did not really believe in the inherent goodness in his fellow human. He is not blind, as a general rule, people just sucked. They were useless unless you could use them for something, and so it was better to find a way to exploit their weaknesses and harness their strengths, kicking them to the curb before you were kicked yourself.

Of course, he has been friends with Felix for so long, he cannot help but exclude his single-minded partner-in-arms from this narrative. He supposes he also feels a dutiful fondness for Dimitri, and he would feel rather irritated if someone took advantage of the naiveté of Mercedes or Ashe or even Annette and Ingrid, but still. Exploit for not being exploited.

However, despite not feeling any particular allegiance or shared history, he came to found out that Byleth was different. She changed his outlook in life.

Sylvain treated her very differently, and not different in the same deferent but contemptuous manner he treated Manuela and Hanneman. He genuinely respected and cherished his professor; in a way he cannot remember ever doing with absolutely anyone.

He wonders why. Maybe it was because of how she treated their class. She was patient and accommodating of all their idiosyncrasies, but knew exactly when and where to press them to be better. She was a stabilizing presence for Dimitri, she helped Mercedes harden and Felix soften, she encouraged Dedue to face his trauma, encouraged Annette to mend fences with her estranged father and Ashe to face the realities about his patron.

The professor even managed to make Sylvain himself make peace with what happened to Miklan, a feat so great they should commemorate her a statue in Fhirdiad.

It was hard to find much fault with Byleth Eisner, and the nobleman found himself increasingly unwilling to try.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier said he would never care about what anyone thought of him, because fuck them, thank you very much.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

When she had shown up with absolutely no warning, she turned everything on its head, which was quite rude, in his opinion. He was very used to being fawned over by girls, but she revealed quickly that she was cut from a very different cloth.

What she found interesting was not what most girls found interesting, probably forged on a life of violence and want and whatever happens when you are raised on a mercenary band, and that immunity to the generally feminine proclivities included Sylavin himself.

He never had to try before to make anyone like him, it just seemed to come with the territory. His Crest did the heavy-lifting for him, and the Gautier charm and beauty closed the deal. The few people who did not like him, drops in the ocean that they were, were not worth his time.

Byleth was different for some reason, though. There was something about her that made him self-conscious and awkwardly aware of things he said or did that she might frown upon.

Goddess, frown, she did. She found him to be exceedingly arrogant, sexist, and in possession of an exceptionally large ego. She was thoroughly unimpressed by the way he used his status as a crest-having nobleman to manipulate people, especially women, into doing things for him.

They were little things, mind you, like getting a snack from the kitchens or covering for him during a detention, he was not so uncouth into manipulating naïve girls into his bed, but it made no difference to her. She thought it was particularly deplorable the way he approached his interactions with girls.

“You present as if you feel like they owe you a date just because you lowered yourself to look at them.” She had said with cold judgement one evening. “It is frankly disgusting.”

He felt downright chastised, and, much to his shock, he felt extremely guilty and embarrassed that he did anything to appear like a filthy philanderer to her.

It was then he realized he cared about what Byleth Eisner thought of him. He cared a lot.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier never believed that he was manipulative.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

Sylvain tended to believe he was better than everyone else. That made it pretty effortless to hone in on easy targets for particularly exploitative manipulations, because he would feel little guilt. Some of these services were mostly benign and turned out fine in the end, with only mild humiliation or a few hours of work lost on the part of the victim.

However, sometimes, he disregarded every conceivable limit.

There is no way for a man to know when was the last time the woman has bled, and so Sylvain usually trusted whatever his bedfellow would tell him. He tried to take his own precautions, pulling out and finishing on his hand, but there were times that he loses himself in the act.

One such instances, with a particularly cunning kitchen maid, had her saying she was pregnant with his child. So, he took the easy way out and tried to vanish from her reach. To that end, he manipulated Ashe to ceding his bedroom. It was fine, the archer was more than glad for helping his classmate, even if it meant having to sleep on the entrance hall and dressing at the sauna changing room. It was all very benign.

Byleth, however, did not think it was benign at all. In fact, she made it a point to single him out in the dormitories when it was the most occupied in order to humiliate him as an almost-punishment.

“Serves you right!” She had said scathingly, while throwing him out of the bedroom by the ears and throwing his clothes out the door, the entire academy coming around to see. “You do not think of anyone but yourself. You do not care who you hurt as long as you get your piece of the pie out of it. You're lonely on the inside, and some day, you will end up actually being alone. Who would want to be friends with someone they can never be sure is trustworthy? Pathetic!”

Sylvain was humiliated, and at first, he was infuriated. She had no clue what he was like and who he was, so her accusations and presumptions were baseless. With time, though, he slowly began to admit she may have been right. Ashe really should not have let him take over his room, and regardless of any moral failings of the kitchen maid, what they did took them both, and he had a responsibility to foot.

Finally, Sylvain started to feel guilty. He compensated his classmate with a new, illuminated copy of Loog and the Maiden of Wind, and tried to assume paternity of the kitchen maid’s unborn child, at least for the time being, but his professor had the forethought of taking her to an exam and Manuela concluded she was not pregnant at all.

He realized Byleth was the first girl to ever stand up to him, not counting his own horrible mother. No one ever dared talk to the heir of Margraviate Gautier the way Byleth had spoken to him that night, and he had to admit he thought that that was pretty admirable. While he did not necessarily enjoy being humiliated in front of the entire high society in Fódlan and surroundings, it did make an impact.

Not long after, he began to notice the way the light would catch her eyes during dusk, turning them from sea blue to almost green. He noticed that, in the morning, she put a thin layer of butter on her toast followed by an equally thin layer of jam, which she would eat while reading the Acta Archiepiscopae, the daily publication of the acts and orders of the Church of Seiros. He noticed that before morning classes she would put two pins in her unruly hair to keep them away from her face, and by lunch, they would have already broken free without her notice. She always noticed after lunch, though, and instead she would put her hair in a bun on top of her head. He noticed that her hands were prone to chap in the cold, and that the balm she used smelt like peppermint.

Most of all, he noticed that, now, when she looked at him, he felt nervous and his heart would speed up. Most peculiar.

With a snicker, Ingrid told him that what he had were feelings for Byleth Eisner. Blinking owlishly, Sylvain realized she might be right.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier had never once been turned down by a girl he had asked out, not when they were fresh conquests and not him revisiting those girls particularly talented in bed. Not once.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

The first time Sylvain asked Byleth out, she thought it was a joke, and he could not believe it. Any other girl would have swooned just because he was talking to her, but not Byleth.

She thought the whole idea was hilarious, preposterous really. Her outrageous response? A flat no! She turned him down flat and Sylvain was not prepared to approach a situation like that, because it simply was not done.

The second time Sylvain asked Byleth out, she had the audacity to get irritated with him. Irritated! The nerve! She acted as though he were a gnat that kept flying around in her face and one that always came back, no matter how hard she tried to shoo it away.

The third time Sylvain asked Byleth out, she was well tired of his persistence and yelled at him to leave her be.

“This is highly inappropriate, and even if it were not, I have no interest or intention of ever going out with the likes of you.” She had raved with a look of utter contempt on her face. “You are not to be trusted, Sylvain Gautier, and I am not a fool.”

Needless to say, he was speechless. He began to realize that he was turning into a stupid character from a stupid novel like Loog and the Maiden of Wind, and then became depressed because his only options at that moment were to either become a brood like Dimitri or an ingénue like Ashe, and neither seemed particularly enticing.

He also realized he would do just about anything, within reason, to make Byleth Eisner like him and, hopefully, date him.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier said he never gossiped, and that gossip was "women's talk".

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

Sylvain never really cared for propriety, but if there was something that he begrudgingly respected was privacy and self-determination. Gossip was just uncouth. However, he was determined to find out what made Byleth tick, but he would never figure it out by talking to her, and so some recognition could not be beneath him.

It was not that he did not want to talk to her, but she was so disturbingly stoic and cagey about her own life, it made him shudder with unease. The only moments she showed genuine emotion was when her students needed support, and in his case, this usually translated to exasperation and tough love. When he really thought about it, he was not sure why he actually liked her when he knew next to nothing about her, but the heart wants what the heart wants, he had mused with an internal dramatic sigh.

Sylvain decided that in order to discover what made Byleth Eisner, Byleth Eisner, he would have to, ugh, gossip. It pained him to have to stoop to gossiping and eavesdropping. He dearly hopes he is not found out, if not for his pride, for the absolute ass-kicking he would receive from his professor dearest.

He targeted the girls of his class, specifically Mercedes, Annette and Ingrid, approaching them one day to ask them about her. He realized right away that that was a big mistake. Not only were they unwilling to talk about Byleth, they took advantage of the opportunity of actually speaking to Sylvain face-to-face by descending upon him like wrathful harpies to berate him for consistently badgering her. Needless to say, he never tried that one again.

After a very regretful drunken tryst with Manuela trying to extract information, Sylvain decided his best course of action was to use magic and his sneaking abilities to listen in on his professor’s conversations. He did not really want to do it because he felt like it just proved Byleth's point, but he was desperate at that point and was almost begging on his knees to Jeralt for if only a kernel of information.

During one particular instance, he hit a jackpot. Dorothea and Byleth were talking about nobles, Sylvain in more specific terms, in what was clearly meant to be a private conversation.

“I might be more inclined to give Sylvain a chance if he was not that much of an entitled bastard.” Byleth had said. “I wonder if this is consequence of his Crest.”

Sylvain would not deny that he was hurt by that. He wanted Byleth to like him, and wanted her to see someone good and noble and loyal.

It was then and there that Sylvain Gautier swore he would change Byleth Eisner's mind, and to prove he meant it, he vowed it on the Goddess Tower on the monastery’s anniversary a few Moons later.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier said he would never change for anyone or anything.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

After witnessing that conversation between Dorothea and Byleth, Sylvain worked incredibly hard to be a person his professor would be proud to know. He became responsible and tried to carry his own weight around the monastery. He became more respectful of the girls who approached him, and he never approached any on his own. He also really tried to deflate his huge head and treat people like they were his equals.

The first time he saw Byleth's shocked reaction to the new him, he did a jig inside his head because he knew his personality shift was something that she never thought he was capable of.

The longer he spent working towards change, the more impressed she became, though she would not care to admit it.

Sylvain had to confess that, at first, he only tried to change so that Byleth's opinion of him would improve. However, he found that as time went on, it became easier and more rewarding to help others and treat them with respect. He realized that, before, people told him what he wanted to hear so that he would like them. Becoming more approachable made it easier to foster real friendships instead of fake ones, which he, begrudgingly, admitted was better than being worshipped.

Still, it did funny things to Sylvain's heart to see Byleth begin to smile at him instead of sigh disapprovingly.

The nobleman vowed that he would keep trying to prove himself to Professor Eisner, so he never had to be without her smile again.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier, deep down, never believed he needed anyone.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

At the ripe old age of twenty, Sylvain started getting restless. With the growing discord that was blooming from the approaching war, he began to feel useless and like he wanted to get in on the action.

It could have been that the opposing side mostly consisted of those he had broken bread for years at the monastery, or that Dimitri’s leadership was questionable at best and disastrous at worse, or that he could sense impending danger like electricity across his skin. It could have been a combination of the it all.

Either way, his mood was generally poor and Byleth found herself to be taking the brunt of his temper more often than not. After a while, she could not bear to continue shouldering his anger as if she were the cause of it and, as a result, she left him. With reason, as he could not find fault in leaving someone who has, repeatedly, threatened to kill and/or force upon marriage to her for her Crest.

Not fifteen days later, the Archbishop turned into a dragon and ate her whole, presumably killing her.

Fuck.

Sylvain' world tilted on its axis and it felt like he was dying. For months, Byleth had been the anchor he had tethered himself to, and she had kept him afloat when he felt like he was going to drown.

His professor had been the reason he became the man that he was, so who was he without her? When they were together, in the deceivingly idyll of school, he had taken for granted her unwavering presence in his life and with her gone, he realized how much he truly needed her, how much he had always needed her.

After the war began, Sylvain assumed the traditional duties of Margrave Gautier and patrolled the border with Sreng, making it clear to those filthy barbarians that they would not be able to catch the kingdom unprotected.

He cried himself to sleep for a week straight when he came home on leave one day to a regretful Alois, who carried with him the Lance of Ruin, found amongst the wreckage of the monastery. It had been so surreal until that point, but holding the weapon he had entrusted to her care in his hand was a physical reminder that she was really gone.

It took a literal slap in the face from Ingrid to wake him up out of his funk. She took no mercy on him, and pointed out how pathetic he had become in Byleth's absence.

“She died defending us, protecting us, you useless waste of space!” The blonde knight barked at her former classmate. “She died so that megalomaniac dictator with horns would not kill us all! The least you can do is get off your fat, smelly arse and do something about it!”

Even though he took no pleasure in hearing that his beloved died so he could live, Ingrid’s speech reminded him that, while the professor would not be coming back, he had to act as if she were. To birth upon a world where she would be glad to live in.

So he did, for four long years, until the day Dimitri had made them promise to return to the monastery. For a blessing of the Goddess, Byleth never came back on a promise and miraculously attended their reunion, too, coming back into the Blue Lions’ fold, from where she should have never left.

After looking at each one of them in awestruck appraisal, she hugged Sylvain tightly. He was not sure who cried harder then.

He would never take Byleth Eisner for granted ever again.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier never really cared for romance.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

On the day that Byleth finally agreed to go out with him, in the middle of a terrible, terrible war, Sylvain immediately grabbed his horse and did a parade around the monastery and the village below to share on his happiness, all while whooping and cheering.

It was not until he returned to the stables and placed his horse on a pen for the page to feed it that he realized he had absolutely no idea about what to do in a relationship.

Sylvain never had a girlfriend before. He had plenty of casual flings, but he never made an effort to stick with one girl because, frankly, he just did not care for the idea. However, with Byleth, the things he felt for her ran far deeper than anything he had ever experienced before, so deep that he entered entirely unexplored territory.

He was terrified. He is a good-for-nothing, after all, he had no business with love.

To be perfectly honest, he got such a case of cold feet that he very nearly broke things off with Byleth before they had even begun, but, with a firm word from Ingrid, some eye rolls from Felix, and several incredulous squeaks from Mercedes, Sylvain finally calmed down and came to his senses. He realized he had something special with his former professor, and while it was scary, it was also exhilarating and exciting.

Regardless, Sylvain did not know how to do the whole romance thing. Do girls even actually like flowers and candy, he had wondered. He came to the conclusion that he had no choice but to ask Dorothea, despite being quite frightened by the prospect of being chased around by an angry swordwoman or worse, laughed off the monastery.

In the end, he was extremely grateful that he did, because he was completely off base. He figured he should have known better, since Byleth had been defying expectations ever since he met her. After taking her to a horseback stroll through the woods around the monastery, they had a nice picnic by a pond, followed by a few matches of checkers.

He knew he did the right thing when, upon returning to the dormitories, Byleth turned and beamed at him.

She could weaponize that smile, he had thought as his heart arrested in his chest and his palms started sweating. She's going to kill me some day.

One night, a year into their relationship, as he stared at her while she was sleeping on his chest, he knew with certainty that Byleth Eisner was one of the best things that had ever happened to him.

*_*_*_*_*

Sylvain Gautier would never admit to being scared, ever.

That changed with Byleth Eisner.

As the war continued to strengthen around them, Byleth and Dimitri were repetitively called away for missions due to their unique skill sets, and Sylvain was sick with worry for his girlfriend and crazed monarch. It was a constant source of stress, and at times, he could not even stomach eating.

While the attack on Enbarr advanced to a glorious closing act, Dimitri returned from his latest mission to the Imperial Palace with Edelgard’s head on his left hand and a maniacal laugh on his lips. Byleth did not return at all.

When Sylvain heard the news, he had thrown up because he knew the outcome could not possibly be good.

The Blue Lions became increasingly more agitated the longer Byleth was gone, and after a month and a half missing, the Church gravely made the decision to pronounce her missing, presumed dead once more.

The news devastated her former students, but none other more than Sylvain, who reverted into a shell of a man once again. He never imagined he could feel devastation beyond what he had felt when the green-haired woman disappeared for the first time, but this certainly trumped that feeling a hundred times over.

Sylvain could not help but to think that the more you have, the more painful it is to lose. Six years ago, he lost a professor, now, he lost the love of his life. He could not stop picturing the little girl with green spike hair like hers and amber eyes like his. He had the image of a tranquil life up north, of days of horse-riding and peacekeeping and nights of devoted love underneath thick furs burned into the back of his eyelids.

Most of all, as he fingered the plain Gautier box holding a simple band with a simple stone. He could not stop imagining what it would have been like being able to say I love you, Lady Gautier before they went to sleep every night and as he woke up next to her every morning.

It was a stormy night when a dark figure entered the Royal Palace of Fhirdiad. The Blue Lions were gathered in preparation for the peace talks that would begin to be held amongst the Kingdom and the former Alliance and Imperial noble houses. It was concerning, as every guest was accounted for, and no one was supposed to waltz into the King’s residence so inconspicuously.

However, when Byleth limped through the banquet hall door and slumped against the door frame, thoroughly ragged and covered in scratches, bruises, and blood, it turned into pandemonium. Sylvain felt like the air had been sucked from his lungs as his legs gave way beneath him, and he no longer felt like he was inside his own body.

For the first time since she went missing, the newly-anointed margrave sobbed until he was physically unable to cry anymore.

It took several weeks for Byleth to fully recover, and almost an entire year for Sylvain to let her out of his sight. While it left her thoroughly rankled, after a while she understood that he was just scared and let the issue lie.

The experience was something he never wanted to relive for a third time, and it taught him a valuable lesson. Life is short.

Even though they had not talked much about the future and she was completely blindsided, Byleth Eisner said yes when Sylvain proposed.

*_*_*_*_*

For his entire life, Sylvain Gautier never believed he would have true purpose or meaning in his empty life.

That changed with Lady Byleth Gautier… and Cordelia Gautier, his two girls and the absolute centre of his entire universe.

Following the war and Edelgard’s defeat, Sylvain married Byleth in a small ceremony surrounded by only close friends in their new territory. Alois was entrusted with giving away the bride, which he did while crying obnoxiously, and Dimitri was to officiate.

A little over a year later, Byleth bounced her own daughter around their large, northern manor, covered in furs and shivering with the winter cold, but always so very happy to be there.

She did not notice and would not know for several years, but Sylvain filled up at least an entire sketchbook of renditions of just her and Cordelia. Every so often, he would secretively look at the pictures and smile to himself, letting the warm feeling in his chest fill his entire body.

Years later, Sylvain would look back on his life with his wife and feel content. His daughter would be worried about leaving so far south to Garreg Mach for school, after her magic aptitudes did not warrant an acceptance to the academy in Fhirdiad. Her mother would assure her it did not matter where she would go, they would be always with her, and she would glare at Sylvain when he would jokingly whisper behind his hand, “As long as it isn’t Enbarr”.

Cordelia would end up being as intelligent as her mother and a bit of a heartbreaker like her father, much to Sylvain' displeasure. Where's my lance when I need it?, He would think with a glower. In the end, she would settle, shockingly, on Lady Varley’s son and moved permanently into Imperial territory, which pained her father so, but he was happy if she was happy.

As the years passed them by, they brought children, grandchildren, godchildren, fortune and happiness beyond belief. For their entire lives, every so often with adoration in her still-green eyes, Byleth would murmur to him, “I love you. Thank you for the opportunity to live out this wonderful life.”

Sylvain Gautier had had a lot of never’s in his life, of denials and ordeals. It took Byleth Gautier (née Eisner) to change everything for the better. After so many years chasing the next high, he was pleased in his staunch belief that there was not a single experience he wishes he had had, and that is the most important thing for him.

*_*_*_*_*

Fire Emblem Masterlist

Three Houses Masterlist

#fire emblem #Sylvain Gautier

2 notes · View notes

ibijau · 4 years

Text

LWJ has to marry NHS to keep A-Yuan with him

on tumblr / on AO3

It was anyone's guess how Nie Huaisang had discovered A-Yuan's fondness for butterflies, but when Lan Wangji agreed for them to be introduced, Nie Huaisang came in with a beautiful butterfly kite. Perhaps the servant had talked. If so, Lan Wangji would have to be careful from now on.

He did not mind too much at that moment though. A-Yuan's face had illuminated the instant Nie Huaisang had come through the door with his gift.

"Young Master Lan Yuan, I am so pleased to meet you," Nie Huaisang greeted the little boy, kneeling down before him and bowing with the same politeness he would have done for an adult. "I am Nie Huaisang, of Qinghe Nie. Has your father told you about me?"

A-Yuan nodded distractedly, his eyes fixed on the colourful kite.

"Does Young Master Lan enjoy flying kites?" Nie Huaisang asked with a grin. "If so, this one is for you. Do you want it?"

The little boy eagerly reached out for the present, but stopped himself at the last moment and threw his father a worried look. Half lying on the bed, Lan Wangji only had to nod, and A-Yuan seized the kite with a large, toothy smile.

"I am glad Young Master Lan is pleased with my gift," Nie Huaisang chirped, before turning to Lan Wangji. "Does he know how to fly one? I'm sorry I didn't bring him something better suited for being inside, I imagine you can't go out easily, but… Well, it was so pretty, I just couldn't resist!"

"He'll learn."

A-Yuan nodded very seriously, lifting the kite above his head to admire it. He did not have one among his current toys, and it was unlikely he would had had one in Yiling, so it was probably his first one. Did he even know what kites were? He had been so young before Yiling, and he probably hadn't left the Burial Mounds very often. Lan Wangji suddenly wished that his back would heal faster, so he could take his son outside and let him fly that kite.

"I bet none of your friends have such a pretty kite," Nie Huaisang boasted. When A-Yuan threw him a puzzled look, he frowned. "Ah… You don't get along with the others perhaps? Hm, you haven't been here long, right? It'll come. You seem like such a good boy, soon enough you'll have so many friends!"

Nie Huaisang looked up toward Lan Wangji, clearly hoping to have that sentiment confirmed.

"He has not left the Jingshi since I agreed to the engagement."

Perhaps if A-Yuan had expressed interest in seeing again the other orphans with whom he had lived the first few weeks, Lan Wangji would have made efforts to organise it. But A-Yuan had seemed satisfied with the way things were, and Lan Wangji had been reluctant to let anyone inside their lives. Sending A-Yuan out of the Jingshi to play with others had been out of the question, of course.

"That's stupid!" Nie Huaisang blurted out, a hint of anger in his voice. He then realised how rude he'd been, and laughed gently. "Apologies. I just meant that making friends is a skill like any other, and it's best to start early. Don't you have cousins or relatives with children his age? You should invite them. Or… when we're married and I'm family, we can have only the children come here. I'm not too bad with little ones, if I say so myself!"

Lan Wangji could not resist throwing him a doubtful look. He remembered how Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian had been as students, and he wouldn't have trusted either of them with children. Certainly Wei Wuxian had matured enough to take care of A-Yuan near the end, but as for Nie Huaisang…

"Don't look at me like that," Nie Huaisang pouted. "I really do know about little children. After we lost so many people in the Sunshot Campaign, everyone has had to help, so I've been the one teaching the little ones to write and have good manners. In a way, I'm the Lan Qiren of Qinghe Nie!"

The idea there might be any common point between Lan Qiren and someone like Nie Huaisang was so ridiculous that Lan Wangji nearly laughed. He remembered his uncle tearing his hair over having such an impossibly bad student that Nie Huaisang had failed his first session in Cloud Recesses. If he has really become a teacher in turn, it must have been a punishment for his bad behaviour.

Lan Wangji was about to remark on that when there was a knock on the door.

"Are you waiting for someone, Hanguang-Jun?"

Lan Wangji shook his head. Nie Huaisang pinched his lips. Without a word, he grabbed A-Yuan by the waist and dropped him on his father's bed, kite and all, before going to the door. He opened it cautiously, and Lan Wangji heard a gasp coming from outside.

"Huaisang?" Lan Xichen said. "I… I was not aware that Second Master Nie was here."

"Yet here I am!" Nie Huaisang chirped, stepping aside to let Lan Xichen enter the house, every bit the perfect host. "Always where people don't want me to be. Your brother had the kindness of inviting me to meet his son. Of course, if you have important business to discuss with him, I will leave you to it."

Lan Xichen hesitated. He turned to look at his brother to silently ask what he preferred, only to smile when he saw A-Yuan clutching his new toy.

"It might not be bad for you to be there as well," Lan Xichen decided. "This concerns your wedding, you should have a say."

Nie Huaisang grimaced, but dutifully closed the door and returned to kneel near the bed, close to A-Yuan.

"Young Master Lan, our discussion will be cut short for now," he told the child in a very serious tone. "I hope we can talk more some other time, because I am very happy to have met you. For now though, I fear grown-ups must discuss some very boring things. Will you let us?"

The child nodded, but still turned to his father for confirmation.

"Go play," Lan Wangji ordered, helping his son down from the bed.

The little boy trotted away, waving his kite around. The three adults watched him go. For some reason, it pleased Lan Wangji to see the other two smiling at the sight of his son.

"And now, to business," Lan Xichen sighed, sitting down on his brother's bed rather than on the floor near Nie Huaisang. Lan Wangji decided to allow it, even if he did not like that proximity. "We have drafted a first list of the guests we will invite. Sect Leaders for the most part, but of course if either of you has requests, we will try to accommodate for that."

He handed Lan Wangji a piece of paper, which his brother read carefully. None of the names on it were a surprise. None of them were people he wanted to ever see again in his life. One in particular he simply could not tolerate near him or his son.

He did not want Jiang Cheng at his wedding, even a wedding he also did not want. There were many legitimate reasons for this, most of which had to do with his uncertainty to stay calm before the man who had murdered his beloved and his son's family.

There was also the cruel thought that in a softer world, he would have wanted Jiang Cheng there, as his future husband's brother. They could have been family. They could have been friends. Lan Wangji had thought they were on their way to that during the war, before Wei Wuxian returned to them, frighteningly powerful and changed beyond words.

"Jiang Wanying is not welcome," Lan Wangji stated as he passed the list to Nie Huaisang.

"It would be a great insult to the Jiang Sect," Lan Xichen calmly explained. "This wedding is a chance for all important sects to come together and be united."

"They have done that recently."

"A wedding is very different from what happened in Nightless City and Yiling," Lan Xichen protested. "This is a chance for unity and peace, to show that we can join hands even without an external threat."

"Wei Ying was not a threat."

"People have died, Wangji. Even you cannot deny that. But this wedding is a chance for a new, peaceful start."

Nie Huaisang laughed at that, and passed the list back to Lan Xichen.

"Peaceful? With that guest list?" he sniggered. "I doubt it. You've got three sets of mortal enemies in there, and at least two feuds in the making that are just waiting for an incident to start!"

Both Lan brothers looked at Nie Huaisang, who only laughed harder.

"Ah, Lans and their refusal to hear gossip! Zewu-Jun, I beg you to have your guest list checked by A-Yao, or that wedding will turn into a brawl. This already isn't the wedding of my dreams, please don't make it worse than it needs to be. Please, please try to involve Jin Guangyao, I trust him to have more sense than you and my brother when it comes to these things!"

"I am sorry that you feel so negatively about this match," Lan Xichen stated coldly. "If you take such an issue with it…"

“Your brother or someone else, it’s the same to me,” Nie Huaisang said with an exuberant grin. “If Da-ge wishes this, I cannot oppose it. But I can demand to have a wedding day that isn’t a complete disaster, and I will. I am serious about having Jin Guangyao’s opinion for the guests, he did wonders at Jin Zixuan’s weddings and the situation was so much worse at the time. As for you, Huangang-Jun… don’t you worry about Jiang Wanying. I’ll handle him. I’ll handle anyone who tries to talk to you, if you want.”

“It is fine,” Lan Wangji replied, uncomfortable at the idea of someone like Nie Huaisang offering to protect him. He did not like that he might appear so pathetic that the Second Master of Qinghe Nie would feel the need to step in.

Nie Huaisang, of course, only laughed at that answer.

“Please, let me! I’ve got to have some fun at that stupid wedding,” he argued, earning himself another cold look from Lan Xichen, which he ignored. “It’s fine, I’m used to doing this! My brother isn’t very keen on banquets and public occasions, so I’m used to distracting people who want to talk to him. Trust me, I will be so politely annoying, Jiang Cheng… that is, Sect Leader Jiang will not want to come anywhere near you for the next, oh, two years at least if he sees me at your side.”

He looked positively delighted at the thought, as if nothing could amuse him more than to piss off Jiang Cheng. Considering what Lan Wangji had seen of their interactions when they were all teenagers, perhaps it was the case. He had never really understood how the friendship between Nie Huaisang and the two Jiang disciples had worked, since it often seemed to consist of more arguments than the sort of quiet discussions he had been taught were the mark of a true, sincere friendship. The three of them had always been shouting or laughing or running after one another, only stopping if they spotted him or some other Lan disciple who might scold them for breaking the rules.

“You should not antagonise Jiang Wangyin,” Lan Xichen scolded lightly.

“You may,” Lan Wangji encouraged instead, and now his brother was glaring at him, which he pretended not to notice.

Nie Huaisang was right. That wedding would be an unhappy event, a mockery of everything Lan Wangji had once dreamed off. But if it could be made unpleasant for the people he disliked the most, it would be a little less upsetting.

#wangxian #xisang #lan wangji #nie huaisang #lan xichen #burn it down au #jau writes #I had the image of nhs being weirdly good with little kids and I couldn't drop it oops #mdzs

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thehandsomeasshole · 4 years

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@starttheanarchy from X

"Then why use them for a job they are not meant for, just keep them to their original purpose and make something new that works for what you need. And because quality work will save in the long term with less repairs, replacements, and malfunctions over all. And your welcome." The wide grin could be heard in her last three words. She was raised to have some manners after all. "And DT could probably do it as long as the load weight isn't over hmmm..." She drifts off as fingers tap together, mental math being calculated. "Eight tonne? Maybe less. I'm not exactly sure on that front since I actually haven't tested his limits on that front. Hmm something to test another day." Her eyes drifted over the floating form of her robot as it stayed ever vigilant of her surroundings. She knew it could do some heavy lifting since she had used previous versions to move things in the junk yard.

Eyes roll at yet another reason on why to avoid corporations, and another as he seems to enjoy being a pest.

"Actually last thing I did was fix up several things that were in disrepair in Overlook, since too much of the population of that poor town have the skull-shivers and had no access to the medicine. Something about repair tickets being ignored or something like that. And I didn't come here for the shallow reason of becoming rich, I'm opening the vault to try and prevent a very clearly corrupt corporation from monopolization on something that might be a blessing or a curse." If she had it her way, she would keep it locked forever since no one has a full understanding of the capabilities and issues of Eridium that began to spawn after the first one opened. To many variables and yet everyone wanting to just add more into the chaos.

"Yes, yes. The definition fits, but you seem to think I am on the same level of depravity like the Fleshrippers or the Bloodshots. To which all I can say is, rude and incorrect. And princess? Really?" That got her to shoot a glare back at the space station.

"Not everyone. Yes there are people who still deserve a chance to be treated like a decent human because they are. But you seem to be hard at work for making it so those people are just as dead as the rest. And you are right, no one has used an army of robots to lay siege on a planet in the name of their own ideals. They used armies of people, and all of them were considered like a plague upon humanity in the context of history. Dictators, tyrants, oppressors, authoritarians, monsters. Wonder how will you be written down."

At the laughter, and how it grew as she talked about what started this whole hot mess off for her on planet side, it made her skin itch with irritation. Out of everything on this fucking disaster hellscape, it was Hyperion that tried to kill her first. Sure others might have had to deal with bandits at other stops, but she went from off the inter-space shuttle to the train with no issues.

It was fair to say Jack was the first person to try to actually kill her. Even when escaping Eden-5 they were aiming for capture to make her life a living hell instead of a death sentience. It was one of the reasons she was trying so damn hard to keep surviving at this point, out of spite for the asshole who tried to kill them after using some shitty signs to inform them of their supposed doom.

Hands were clenched into fists and she could feel a chill roll through her body. It was like the ice never left at times.

A deep breath as she turns her face to the sun that burns the landscape, she is fine and alive. And she isn't going to follow his script and get pissed. She isn't going to scream like everyone else on this planet. The Mechromancer is going to do what she always does, go against what is expected.

"How about you tell me something else instead. You worked with the Crimson Raiders? What happened? What is the full story, from beginning to end?" Her voice is calm and even, one that seems to hold no judgment and wanting to listen. And she does, after all there isn't much information on the group. Gaige had no plans to jump ship, but she honestly had as much trust for them as she did for most anyone on this planet that wasn't shooting at her. Eden-5 taught her that the only person she could ever trust was her father and the friends she created with her own two hands.

"No bullshit, no propaganda. Just your side of the story. I have time."

Jack did smile at the little sass she threw his way, despite himself. "Well, empty, those things weigh nearly five tonnes. So, nice try. I guess." He chose to ignore her initial comment about using the loaders for their designed purpose. There was not enough patience in Jack's body to unpack all of that right now.

"Oh, the vaults are definitely a curse. But, once you get the ball rolling around here, there's not really anything anyone can do to stop it." Jack shrugged lightly, scanning through the first four pages while he spoke, "You just… gotta do what you can before another idiot comes along and screws everything up even worse than you did."

"Nah, you're right. Princess made me feel a little icky. How about… I- I'll get back to you, I'll think of something real good." he laughed lightly, beginning to scribble down some notes on the papers before he continued.

"You sure as hell act like 'em, you and your bandit buddies. Just exactly how many things or people have you killed since you got to Pandora? Hey, look, I'll even give wildlife a pass cause- Well, you could kill a hundred skags one day and the next day there'd be two hundred more. Let's just focus on people. Maybe you're not running around screaming about meat bicycles, and maybe it is a little rude of me, but it's also correct. You just don't wanna admit it."

"The people who are still decent in this universe are few and far, kid. In my entire life, I've only met two people who were truly selfless." One's dead and the other’s… worse. "But, you do realise that if it wasn't me up here, it'd just be someone else? Hell, Dahl and Atlas would still be plowing through planets like they're big balls of paper and slaughtering everyone in their way while going off about fighting for those planets' freedoms and peace."

"Ooh, I love tyrant! Has a nice ring to it, don't you think? Always considered myself more notorious, than anything else." The sharp, almost humorous-sounding edge to his voice gave the impression he was teasing her, "Kid, it's nothin' I haven't heard before. You really think I'm gonna be kicking it anytime soon, anyway? Nah. Nope, not happening! I got way too much to do."

Jack's brows knitted together and slowly raised in a mixture of surprise and confusion. Sure, maybe she didn't care, he'd just never had a person who hated him ask for his side of the story before.

He decided not to express his shock.

"So, I'd been working on Helios since it launched, I was, uh-... A- a programming and engineering specialist for Hyperion for ten, fifteen years, maybe. I was in charge of most of the construction, getting together schematic proposals to give to my bosses, all that kinda shit."

"The first time I met Lilith and Roland was when Dahl decided they wanted to massacre all the workers on Helios and take it over. They… They didn't discriminate. If you worked for Hyperion, they'd gun you down without even batting an eye. They killed so many of the workers up here, I knew them all personally. We- we didn't even have a real military then, for God's sake! They shot workers out of the sky when they were trying to evacuate. That was the level of murderous psychopaths we were trying to deal with. We defended as best as we could, but even the freaking loaders weren't weaponised yet, I had like… Six hours to get them into a position to defend themselves, and you bet your ass I did it. I guess that actually answers your earlier question, too. I used them for a job they weren't made for out of necessity, the damn Lost Legion shot at them when they were running away, too. Assholes."

"I managed to get the vault hunter's I'd hired down to Elpis in a moonshot, think you've met a couple of them. They got to Concordia thanks to-" Shit. He hadn't actually thought about Janey in a while. He'd ask Athena how they were both doing, but she'd probably curb stop his head before he could even say hello. "-uh, this mechanic. They asked Lilith and Roland to help cause, y'know, Dahl had stuck a jamming signal somewhere on that moon and I couldn't work Helios's defences until it was shut off. They knew people on Helios were dying, and they said no."

"They only started to help when their lives were in immediate danger and Dahl got control of the moonshot laser and start firing away at Elpis. I really did trust 'em to help us, y'know? Like they promised they would."

"I guess they kinda did. We managed to get control of the laser again and… They blew it up. They nearly took the whole space station down just because they didn't want Hyperion having it. That stupid laser could've saved Pandora, you know. It could've- The blasts were so concentrated we could've wiped out an entire bandit settlement and their nice neighbours next door would've barely felt the ground tremble. I'd worked so hard on that laser. You have any idea how hard it was to make? How much progress they destroyed when they blew that damn thing up? A lot! A whole, freaking lot and-... Sorry. Off topic. Uh…"

He made a small noise, "Oh, yeah. Anyway, after that it was just a rush trying to get to the vault before anyone else did. Dahl was already there, but after what happened with those two I wouldn't have been surprised if they got to the vault first just so we couldn't."

"But, we did. My vault hunters took care of the- The Empyrean Sentinel, I think they called it. Big bastard, more human than the other vault monsters. Freaky stuff."

"So, the Sentinel was dead, and we finally got to the vault relic. It looked like… Nothing. Very underwhelming. Just a weird little floating vault symbol. I decided to touch it and-..." Jack went quiet for a while, his knuckles growing white with how tightly he was gripping the armrests of his chair, "And I saw… everything."

He felt sick even talking about it. The pit in his stomach growing deeper and he knew if he didn't stop soon he'd fall into a full blown breakdown. So, he took a shaky breath in and continued.

"Wasn't long after that when Lilith made her grand entrance. She destroyed the relic and- blasted the fuck out of my face. You ever had your face branded by some freaky eridian technology? It sucks. Real bad."

He let his head drop back, and he rubbed his eyes, "So, there's my side. Think I can quit my day job and become a professional story teller?" Though he tried to make a joke, the fire in his voice seemed to have dissipated. He just sounded… tired.

#jack was not expecting that either hsndkdkd #and also i do see what you mean about this turning into a whole ass novel hahaha #it could've been paradise // borderlands 2

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softjeon · 5 years

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Featherlight | Pt. 1

• Pairing: Namjoon x Angel!Jimin • Side-Pairing: Jungkook x Angel!Yoongi • Genre: Fluff / light angst | Angel!AU ( → Gifset Trailer) • Words: 7,6k | AO3 • Disclaimer: mentioning of nightmares, anxiety

written with @cassiavioletblue

↳ Humans could hear their guardians, feel their voice inside of them like warm chocolate on a cold winter day. Usually it was enough for angels to whisper to their human, make them consider a different option or another approach. And then there were people who were effectively ignoring their inner voices and apparently Namjoon was just really adamant on not taking care of himself and getting himself into danger constantly.

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“He can’t be that bad,“ Jimin answered with a sigh as he watched Yoongi walk up and down the hallway in a nervous manner. Yoongi’s clothes were dirty and there was a hole ripped into his jeans and it certainly wasn’t a fashion statement, leaving Jimin wondering what had happened this time. He heard a few stories about Yoongi’s newest client that was giving him a really hard time. But to him they all just sounded funny and kind of cute. He didn’t really understand why Yoongi was making such a fuss about it. It was their job after all and sometimes it came with a risk.

“He just keeps you on your toes. He’s human after all, be kind to him, Yoongi.” He chuckled softly and began to clean the feathers of his wings while talking, “Just breathe, restore your energies…and then try again tomorrow. Maybe you’re doing it completely wrong and you need to look at it from a different perspective, hm?”

“‘He can’t be that bad’, yeah that’s exactly what I thought at first as well. ‘He’s just having a difficult phase, he has a lot to deal with, hes unconcentrated because of his lack of sleep.’ That’s all bullshit!” Jimin gasped as the other cursed. He could see one of Yoongi’s feathers coming loose and tumbling to the ground. Swearing wasn’t good for angels. But Yoongi was so lost in his anger that he didn’t even notice, “He’s a mess! An unbelievably uncontrollable mess! I tried, okay! I tried a lot! I thought ‘well I have wings and he has just those lanky legs and flailing arms’ but god can he cause trouble with it! If he wasn’t so obviously pure then I would have sworn he has a piece of demon inside of him, like, it’s not possible to do that much damage to yourself and others without some mischief in you - but his consciousness is as clean as angel feathers. Not a tiny spot on it! I’m going crazy!”

“Yoongi! Don’t talk about him like this! It’s not his fault and it is your job to keep him safe after all!” Jimin reached out for his friend, soothing over his arms but Yoongi only swatted him away again. “But…you’re his guardian. He should listen to you…did you try to talk to him while he sleeps?” Jimin asked carefully and in the sweetest voice, knowing anything could make Yoongi even angrier now and he didn’t want to make him pull out his feathers in frustration.

“Does it look as if I’m not doing my job?!” Yoongi stopped short and motioned down to his ripped jeans and the ruffled tips of his wings where the feathers had been smashed. If he didn’t heal that fast, his left side would be also still littered with bruises but because of his healing powers there was nothing but smooth, creamy and flawless skin. “I talked to him like a million times and he either ignores me completely like I’m not even there - or he tries to pull me into some philosophical excursion about how strawberries can only truly have the color red and what it means for the world that white strawberries exist! I mean he’s amazingly smart when he’s awake and concentrated enough to properly think but with all the absent-mindedness and abstruse sleep talking I’m really, actually considering filing for a change.” His lips went thin when he pressed them together. One didn’t just ask for a transfer like that. It was a real act and also considered rude. He just didn’t know how else to do this without one of them getting seriously hurt in the end.

“A change?” Jimin gasped and raised his eyebrows. “But Yoongi! You can’t…just…do that. M-maybe he’s not too bad and it’s just a phase with him right now. You know how humans can be sometimes.” He came closer again, when Yoongi sat down at his office desk, wings hanging dreary down his back and face hiding in the palm of his hands. Jimin walked around the desk, sitting himself on the side of his desk and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “You’re not giving up if we haven’t tried everything, yet. Maybe I can help? I have a new protectee who isn’t out very often, so I have some time to go over your guy’s file. What do you say? Maybe I’ll find a new way to get through to him…”

“Yeah, sure, go over his file. Go over his whole life if you need to. There’s no trauma to heal that would make him stop hurting himself because he’s just mindless, nothing else. He concentrates on his thoughts and passions so much that his mortality is just a side note to him. Why don’t you just take him if you think so highly of him, try to do all you can think of and learn how fucking frustrating it is to see that nothing helps and you could instead just watch him kill himself with a toaster because in the end it will go like this anyway. And before you ask yes that was an actual thing. He was washing the dishes and almost knocked the toaster into the water. While it was plugged in.”

Jimin couldn’t count the many times he had gasped now, shocked at the way Yoongi was talking about his protectee. He would never dare to say such things. Jimin was about to scold the angel again, when Yoongi asked him to take over. “Yeah, sure. How should I handle two protectees at the same time then? I can’t do that.” Jimin rolled his eyes when another feather fell on the floor and picked it up again, pushing it into the jar by their desk where he stored all of Yoongi’s feathers. There were a few by now. It was his own little version of a ‘swear jar’.

“If you would have been fast enough it wouldn’t have happened,” Jimin pursed his lips and leaned in closer to Yoongi, “And just because you’re lazy you can’t make me do two protectees.”

“That was a joke, Minnie. I would never let you within that man’s reach. He might have you hurt the very first hour.” He shook his head. “Really, you don’t wanna do that. Be happy about your calm new human and visit my grave please.” He sighed dramatically, knowing damn well that he couldn’t die that easily.

“Why not? Do you think I can’t handle it?” Jimin’s voice almost tumbled over and he got up from the table. “Do you still think I’m too soft for this job? I’ve been through the guardian training just like you and I am very much capable of handling a difficult human.” The younger angel huffed in anger, staring down Yoongi. “I’m not visiting your grave since you’re not able to die, you idiot of an angel…ah!” Jimin squealed when something pulled at his wings and he saw a tiny feather slowly descending to the ground. He pushed his hands dramatically over his mouth, before his eyes narrowed and focused on Yoongi again. Trying to calm himself, Jimin turned away from Yoongi, mumbling something under his breath. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Jimin closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before he snapped around to his friend again. “Okay. One week. Not more! Just seven days…that’s it.” Jimin held out his hand to seal the deal.

“Yeah, says the angels who’s squealing from losing a singly down feather...” He was careful to mumble it under his breath to not anger Jimin any further. But he was worried. No one could handle Namjoon. However he knew that Jimin wouldn’t let it go and if Yoongi would stay stubborn and not let Jimin catch a glimpse for himself the younger would pout forever. At least a few weeks (Angels had a different understanding of time of course). Also there was quite a big part inside of him who just wanted some peace and to sleep for a full night and to rest his wings and recharge his healing powers and just... not be on edge 24/7. And Jimin could always request them to change back. So, despite better knowledge he reached for Jimin’s hand - and took it, sealing the deal.

The younger angel bit his lip nervously, nodding to reassure himself that he hadn’t done something stupid right now. Because somehow it felt like he had done exactly that.

“No one is telling Yooa? Or any other angel?” Jimin cocked an eyebrow but both of them knew better than to mess with their boss, the head of the guardian angel department. She looked sweet, like pure innocence personified – but she didn’t like it when you ignored the rules. Rules were there to protect them, to keep them safe. Letting go off Yoongi’s hand when they both agreed, Jimin opened his drawer and got out Jungkook’s file and then quickly switched it with the one the other was holding. Namjoon’s was looking way thinner than Jungkook’s and Jimin really wondered what it was about that human. Was it really just because of mindlessness?

Well, he was about to find out…

“So…Jungkook he is really soft, you have to be ca-,” The angel stopped mid-sentence when there was a whiff of fresh air and Yoongi was gone. The other had barely looked at where Jungkook lived and had taken off, not even caring about the file. While some said, that getting to know your protectee without any prejudgments were good, Jimin thought at least a little knowledge wouldn’t have hurt for Yoongi not to run into trouble.

“Great…,” Jimin shook his head, opening Namjoon’s file with a sigh and with a -poof and a little bit more sparkle- he was gone, too.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Yoongi landed with a soft sound in a little squat to cushion the weight. It always felt a little strange to come back to earth after being in heaven. Being weightless felt natural to him and even though he had no physical body being on earth still felt different. He was there with earth beneath his feat and gravity keeping him there. He could even feel the wind rustling through his feathers. Which was something he liked a lot. Generally he liked experiencing weather on earth (there was nothing like it up there in heaven). There was nothing sweeter than opening up your wings in a summer rain letting the droplets caress it and then create rainbow with the sunlight...

Yoongi sighed, bringing his thoughts back on track. he was stalling a little, nervous that maybe Jimin’s sweet nature had painted Jungkook in nicer colors than he actually was. Though seriously, he absolutely couldn’t be worse than Namjoon. He straightened up - and then walked determinedly through the door.

There was a soft yawn coming from the other side of the room and then the door opened. The human ruffled through his curly hair, waddling towards his small kitchen, passed the coffee machine and got out a carton filled with delicious banana milk instead. With the biggest smile Yoongi had ever seen on an early morning, Jungkook took a sip from his beloved milk and giggled.

Yoongi blinked.

Then he rubbed his eyes.

This was his protectee? At first he wasn’t sure if he hadn’t chosen the wrong house and had run into a fellow guardian angel but the boy didn’t see him. So he must be human. He didn’t look like it though. He had big eyes that were literally sparkling, curly hair that looked as soft as feathers and a smile that lit up the room like heavenly light. If this was actually Jungkook then Yoongi couldn’t believe how Jimin could let him out of his sight even for one second.

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

A guardian angel was always just guarding one human at a time – their protectee. Not every human had someone assigned to him, only those who really needed someone to guide them and help them to stay safe. Guardian angels were invisible to the eye of humans. They could hear them, feel their voice inside of them like warm chocolate on a cold winter day. Usually it was enough to talk to a human to make him consider a different option or another approach to something but not everyone was reacting right away. Some needed a pull, then angels could reach out for the humans. They could make them feel their touch. And then there were people who were effectively ignoring their inner voices or the soft push.

Every human had their own individual reasons why and apparently Namjoon was just really adamant on not taking care of himself and getting himself into danger constantly.

Jimin had closed the file again, letting it disappear with a snap of his finger when he stood in what seemed like Namjoon’s living room now. Jimin was about to take a step forward, when he slipped on something. He screamed, flailing his arms as he tried to save his fall but still rather ungracefully landed on his butt. Jimin shook his head and blinked his eyes to get rid of the stars that were dancing in front of his view. Now that Namjoon-guy already rubbed off on him, Jimin thought and he hadn’t even properly seen him, yet. The angel was about to get up, laughing to himself, searching for the human, when he was met with an impressionable pair of…

“Thighs,” Jimin gulped heavily, his eyes slowly wandering up his muscles legs until it met a torso and… “Oh my god,” The angel let his eyes linger on Namjoon’s naked chest for a little too long. There was water dripping down from Namjoon’s wet hair onto Jimin’s face. Quickly, he scrambled away and up on his feet, pressing himself against the wall – only hoping that Namjoon hadn’t felt anything. But if it had been true what Yoongi said, Namjoon didn’t react…like ever.

Namjoon stopped as he saw the small bottle of hairspray rolling away and then bend over to pick it up. He was lucky he had seen it now, someone could have slipped on it if it was just lying there. And as he knew himself it would have probably be him. With a sigh he placed it aside. He should really be more careful. He knew that, obviously with all the bruises and marks he already had but after what had happened yesterday he had really sworn himself to be more careful. It could have ended real badly, he actually could have broken his neck and be dead!

After staying too long in the shop again and overworking himself (they had gotten a new piece and he had wanted to clean it and have it presentable and sellable for the next day) he had slipped on the stairs and had fallen down a few steps. He had regained grip on the handle like a miracle so he hadn’t tumbled all the way down but it had been a close call.

He could still feel it in his bones.

Jimin observed Namjoon closely and how the other placed the hairspray bottle somewhere, not even really caring where he was putting it. Now that he was looking more closely, Jimin could see the chaos all around. It wasn’t dirty or packed with stuff, but rather unorganized. Jimin took a look around, letting his fingertips soothe over a few papers that were strewn all over Namjoon’s kitchen table. There were bills, receipts and a lot of ordering lists thrown all over and Jimin had to fight the urge to start organizing it all into different folders. The dishes were piling high in Namjoon’s kitchen, just like his dirty clothes that the human was now trying to push into the washing machine. All of it at once. Jimin was about to turn to look at the rest of his apartment, when he saw the opened door of the bathroom cabinet right above Namjoon. His eyes widened. The bathroom was narrow and with the way Namjoon was squatting, he would definitely hit his head the moment he would stand up again. While Namjoon was still busy, Jimin leaned in. “Be careful when you get up, will you?”

Namjoon had already started moving when Jimin had whispered into his mind - though instead of stopping or reacting in a safe way he just looked up, almost poking himself in the eye. ‘Luckily’ he only banged his head on the cabinet door. Hard. Namjoon cursed, so colorfully that it made Jimin blush. In his anger Namjoon threw the door of the washing machine shut, with a little too much force so instead of snapping in and closing the door cleanly swang back to bump right against Namjoons shin.

Jimin couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. He had made it worse. Pouting, Jimin let Namjoon pass with an angry groan and followed him into the kitchen. Namjoon was getting out some frozen peas to put it on top of his head to cool the bruise that was about to form and Jimin felt awfully guilty. “I’m so sorry, Namjoon.” He whispered, “Maybe you should lay down and rest a little more, hm?” Jimin came a little closer, when the human leaned back with his eyes closed. Luckily for him, Namjoon had gotten dressed somewhere in between his observations and the incident but even now, when he looked at him this closely, Jimin couldn’t deny his handsomeness. Namjoon was truly beautiful, Jimin thought to himself and cocked his head aside admiring him a little more.

Namjoon got out some painkillers and caffeine, effectively nipping Jimin’s advice about laying down and resting in the bud. It was almost as if he heard the angel’s whispers in some way, as he was supposed to do - but instead of following them he acted on them in a completely different way that would have been healthy. Namjoon swallowed the pills and then got back to closing the machine properly and starting it. Then he sat down at the table to work with the mess that were his papers.

Observing Namjoon and his handsomeness for a while, Jimin quickly shook himself out of his stance, remembering his deal with Yoongi. He was supposed to show the angel that Namjoon wasn’t a hopeless case. That Yoongi just hadn’t found the right approach and Jimin was able to handle this all on his own. He nodded affirmatively to himself, busy with his own thoughts, when he noticed Namjoon rushing off to get his jacket and keys and then ran back into the kitchen to make himself a coffee-to-go. Apparently the human was late for work now (Jimin always forgot human time was going by faster) and he had tried to stuff all of the important papers in his bag. The angel’s expression turned into a frown when he saw the carelessness and how the papers were sticking out. But wasn’t he owning a shop? Jimin remembered something that he had read in his file, but he wasn’t so sure anymore. But five minutes couldn’t hurt either way, especially if it was his shop.

“If you keep being so hasty you will spill hot coffee all over your hand, Nam-,” Jimin froze dead in his tracks when the human did exactly that and jumped back, almost knocking over the cup if it wasn’t for Jimin who reached for it last minute to keep it in place. “Really?” Jimin shook his head and face-palmed himself. But there wasn’t much time to dwell on it, when Namjoon was effectively cleaning it up and ran out the door – almost forgetting his keys in the process.

The angel was following Namjoon quietly, biting his lip in thought as he observed every motion of his body closely. He was bumping into quite a few people on his way to work, apologizing in a respectful manner each time. So, he wasn’t doing it because he didn’t care but because he was literally not paying attention to his surroundings. Jimin counted the tenth yawn in a matter of fifteen minutes and really began to worry for this human. Namjoon needed more than a guardian angel, maybe a life-coach, or a professional organizer. Jimin made a mental list of things Namjoon needed to improve on, wondering if he could somehow get the human to call an agency who could assign him a personal assistant. Maybe if he left notes? Or google searches for agencies? Maybe Namjoon just needed a little push in the right direction? Skipping happily, Jimin couldn’t help but smile. He felt like he had a plan now, something that he could do to make Namjoon’s life a little easier. Maybe this was what he needed? If he didn’t listen to his inner voice, maybe he would listen to a few signs.

Jimin was about to catch up onto the human, when his eyes widened and he saw how Namjoon wasn’t paying attention - again! For the third time today and it was early in the morning! How was it possible for someone to be this unattentive?

Jimin was behind Namjoon in a second, whispering, trying to get him to notice that he was straight up walking into a very busy street right now, coffee in one and phone in the other hand. But he didn’t hear him due to his music or maybe he didn’t want to hear him either or his mind was too occupied only waving him off as if he was an annoying fly not his guardian angel. He tried to grab his shirt, pulling at it but Namjoon just walked a little faster. How could he be so blunt? Jimin was starting to panic, knowing now how Yoongi must feel everyday. This was exhausting! Jimin screamed internally, whipping around to try and find another human that he could use to make Namjoon stop. But there was no one. He was alone. There was a car honking loudly and Jimin just reacted on instinct.

Namjoon had walked a little too quick because he was late to work and therefore his mind was already ahead, planning his day at work, mentally immersing himself in the projects he would work with. There was something uncomfortable lingering at the edge of his mind, something that was bothering him and trying to tell him that he was missing something, that something wasn’t quite right but he pushed it aside for later to deal with it then in favour of finishing his thoughts. He couldn’t, however, as there was suddenly someone grabbing ihm and pulling him backwards. Within a blink of his eye, Jimin had fully appeared out of nowhere and forcefully pulled Namjoon back by his jacket with the strength of a human, because apparently the other didn’t want to listen to his guardian and inner voice. Mid-pulling him back, Jimin was about to open his mouth and scold Namjoon angrily, the other turned, stumbling, throwing the coffee and wrapping his arm around Jimin as if he wanted to hold onto him. Jimin yelped, the angel’s eyes widened. Namjoon flinched, and because it felt like he was attacked he turned around ready to fight, accidentally spilling his coffee over the both of them and then losing balance from his quick turn. Instinctually he held onto the boy who had just grabbed him, making them both fall over themselves and into a heap onto the side of the street.

Jimin landed rather softly, only scraping his hands on the asphalt where he had tried to keep himself from falling. There was a car honking and rushing by fast and Jimin breathed out a heavy sigh. He felt a little dizzy from the fall, ignoring the coffee stain on his white shirt and shook his head to get rid of the stars that were dancing in front of his eyes.

“For heaven’s sake, please watch where you are going ne-,” Jimin blinked his eyes open and gulped heavily, when he realized the position they were in. Lips only inches apart, eyes gazing deeply, and chests pressed onto one another. Namjoon’s arm was still wrapped tightly around his waist and Jimin could feel the human’s heartbeat right under his chest. His own was beating fast, with a few occasional jumps. This close he was even more handsome.

“What.. just happened?” At second glance the boy didn’t seem the type to just randomly attack people so why had he grabbed him? “Did you…,” Could he have actually been so lost in his thoughts that he had overseen a car? Had that strange boy just saved his life? Namjoon tried to get up which was kind of difficult with the boy unmoving on top of him and then reached around to see if he could find his glasses hoping that the were still usable. He hated contacts as he had forgotten to take them out to sleep one too many times with uncomfortable consequences.

“Did I save you? Yes. I tried to call ou-,” Jimin stopped, slowly sitting up when he saw Namjoon was searching for his glasses. “You weren’t really paying attention. I am sorry that I made you lose your balance.” The angel still awkwardly sat on Namjoon’s lap, examining the palm of his hands that already began to heal and quickly put them down, when his eyes met the human’s again while he put on his glasses. Why was this human so god damn handsome and yet such trouble?

“Thank you, that’s... that was nice I mean…” He tried to get up again, failing at the solid weight on his legs, “Excuse me, can you please get off me? I think it’s a little dangerous if we keep lying there at the side of the road. Someone might oversee us.” He felt horribly awkward and with a hot, awful rush of heat he realized that now he would definitely be way too late and there would probably customers be waiting in front of the store angry and annoyed and the doors still being closed and he would lose what little customers he had and…

“I.. I have to go!” Hurriedly he patted the dust from his clothes to get himself somewhat presentable.

“Mr. Kim!” A young boys voice shouted from across the street, looking left and right and then ran towards them. “Mr. Kim…Namjoon, are you alright? What happened?” Jungkook gave Jimin a soft smile and then froze for a second, furrowing his brows as he looked at the young man who was trying to get up from the ground as gracefully as he could despite the situation.

Great. Jimin bit his lip. What was his protectee doing here? Why did he know Namjoon? And if Jungkook was here then… The joyful laugh of someone he very well knew, made Jimin snap his head around to see Yoongi holding his stomach while pointing at him only a few feet away. Of course, the others couldn’t see him. Yoongi was still an angel, while he himself had quickly unveiled his human form to save Namjoon. He had never done this before.

But this had been an emergency.

Narrowing his eyes, Jimin was about to put out his tongue at the angel, when Jungkook interrupted him again. “Do I know you?” Jungkook asked softly, reaching for Namjoon’s hand to help him up but at the same time never leaving Jimin’s gaze.

“Kind of new here, so no,” Jimin quickly shook his head and got up himself, wiping over his now dirty and not so white anymore shirt and pants. Jungkook nodded at that, looking at Namjoon full off worries. But before he could open his mouth, Jimin spoke, “You should maybe check in the hospital to see if you haven’t hurt your head. And please…be a bit more mindful.” The angel smiled at the human, “There’s not always someone around.”

Jungkook nodded at that, dusting off Namjoon some more and because the other wasn’t saying anything, Jungkook thanked Jimin with a bow. “No worries,” Jimin pulled at his clam shirt, “Thanks for the coffee, I guess.”

Namjoon finally really looked at the guy who had pulled him off the street and gasped audibly. He had been so busy searching for his glasses and calming Jungkook and then worrying about the shop and dusting off his clothes that he hadn’t really seen Jimin. Of course he had noticed that the other was wearing -formerly- white clothes all over as if he was on his way to a “midsommar festival”. Though what was shocking him most was the pure beauty of the younger. He was no stranger to beauty (he knew Jungkook after all) but he had never seen someone with so sincerely kind eyes and such a honest smile. His face looked soft as if someone had blurred all the sharp edges to make him look like some otherworldly, ethereal creature... if there hadn’t been the dirt on his pants and the massive, brownish ugly coffee stain all over his shirt. “Oh, oh , I’m... I’m so very sorry, I’m really... you could give it to me and I’ll clean it I promise, I’ll have it just as before by tonight and...”

Jimin had half-heartedly turned already, not being able to overhear Yoongi’s laugh coming from the sidelines of the scenery. He really wanted to shut him up, but every little anger was forgotten when Namjoon talked to him. “And…you want me to undress right now?” Jimin raised an eyebrow, chuckling at Namjoon’s sudden blush that appeared on his cheeks. “It’s fine, Namjoon.” Jimin shook his head, “It’s just a coffee stain. You’re alive and that’s what matters to me.”

Jungkook still awkwardly stood at the sidelines. He could see the hesitation in Namjoon’s eyes and knowing the shop-owner, he was probably torn between running off to his café and making this right. Also, Namjoon was really awful at flirting on top of that. He had seen this happening a couple of times whenever he had visited the little antique shop. It was cringe-worthy and one couldn’t look away nor look too closely. But Jungkook loved the small café that Namjoon had build in his antique shop, small little bookshelves on each side and so many antiques that Jungkook loved to hear the stories about. “Mr. Kim, do you maybe want me to open the shop? I know where everything is.” He whispered and held out his hand for the key, “I can work the coffee machine. I helped you before, remember? There will only be the morning customers right now…so you can…” Jungkook nodded towards Jimin and whispered, “Thank him properly. He saved your life! This could have gone way worse.”

Namjoon would never give his shop over to just anyone because he cherished the little shop a lot, it was his everything. Though Jungkook wasn’t just anyone. He didn’t really knew the boy, not in a proper way at least where Jungkook had talked about himself. But they had talked about books and their love for music at seemingly random visits and Namjoon had seen Jungkook handle his treasures. It said a lot about a person how they touched the things he had for sale. There were those who just went for the glittery stuff, the things that looked expensive although Namjoon didn’t have a lot of those. There were those who didn’t really have eyes for them at all, just passing by (Namjoon always wondered what they were doing there in the first place and if they might have walked into the wrong shop or were just trying to pass the time in their lunch break) and then there were those who came in and saw, who took everything in, observing, admiring. It always had Namjoon smiling when he witnessed a customer carefully caressing the beautiful arch of an armrest or trail their fingertips along an ostrich feather of a headpiece he had just arranged. Jungkook was such a customer. And this was why despite better knowledge he gave his key to the boy that he didn’t even knew the last name of.

Jimin watched Jungkook walk away with furrowed brows and then turned back to Namjoon. He had only been Jungkook’s protectee for barely more than a few weeks and although he had found what the younger needed pretty quickly he never once had mentioned Namjoon or stumbled upon him, even if he followed Jungkook almost everywhere in his guardian form. Thinking about it...Jimin only realized now for how long he was already in his human form, something he had never been in before (except for in training). “This was an emergency right?” Jimin mumbled, when Yoongi came closer, eyeing him from the side, his heart racing fast in anxiety. There was a strict rule about using one’s human form. And Jimin had just broken it and the guilt was lying heavy on him, needing Yoongi’s reassurance. “Oh god, I’m going to hell.” He mumbled under his breath

“What?” Namjoon hadn’t gotten a word that Jimin had just said but his mumbling sounded suspiciously guilty. Namjoon thought hard what Jimin could feel guilty about and then his stomach filled with ice. The boy had just called him ‘Namjoon’. Even though he might have gotten it from Jungkook he had used it so casually as if they knew each other. And how had he been so quick as to rescue him at all? He must have been very close and paying lots of attention to him. Did that mean that Jimin was... a stalker?

“Hm?” Jimin looked up at Namjoon, when he saw the color fading from his face. It shut Yoongi up effectively as well, who just wanted to tell Jimin how dumb he was for thinking about even going to hell, because he wouldn’t survive down there a second, as he watched the scenery unfold once more. This was truly entertaining to watch.

Jimin reached out for the human carefully. “Are you okay?” He asked carefully, “You look kind of pale…are you sure you didn’t hit your head? You really need to pay more attention to the traffic, though. And maybe work on your balance skills.” He giggled, blinking up at the taller man, Jimin searched Namjoon’s eyes while a warm smile played on his lips to cheer him up. “I’m really sorry I startled you so bad, but I panicked when I saw the car coming closer and you just went ahead. I reacted out of instinct.”

“So you... don’t know me? You just helped a random stranger to not get killed in a car accident?” Jimin looked way too nice to be a psychopath. But didn’t they say that that’s exactly one would think before getting murdered by one? Namjoon swallowed hard.

Jimin’s expression turned confused and then chuckled, “Yeah? What else would that be?” His eyes widened when he realized what Namjoon must have been thinking. “You…oh my heaven, did you think? That I was stalking you or something?” Jimin couldn’t help but laugh, “As cute as you are but I wouldn’t even be sure what I would stalk you for? Anyways.” Jimin smiled at Namjoon, shaking his head, still not over his idea of being stalked. Where the heavens did he get that idea from? This human really was…different – that was for sure. “There are good people out there in the world, too you know.” Jimin winked at the human and turned around.

Namjoon turned bright red when the boy saw right through him as if he had his thoughts spelled it out on his t-shirt. “N..no, that’s not…,” He tried to lie but as always he wasn’t very good at it. The boy turned to go and that was the last hint he had needed before getting the guts to call after him. “Wait! As I already spilled coffee on you do you want... some more coffee? As thanks? Not on you, I mean.. can I take you out for coffee to say thank you?” He cringed internally at that mess of a sentence.

Jimin halted in his steps and his heart sped up so fast that he felt dizzy for a second. Was Namjoon asking him out? His guardian angel? That he didn’t know was his guardian angel – at least for a week, because he was dumb enough to fall for Yoongi’s tricks. Jimin looked over his shoulder to Namjoon. “Me?” He pointed at himself, “Eh…I…yeah okay, sure.” Jimin nodded, blushing like crazy out of a sudden, completely ignoring his moral instincts.

Namjoon could feel the younger’s shyness, gathering confidence that the other wasn’t out there with bad intentions. “It doesn’t need to be awkward and there’s no need for coffee either we could go for something to eat or some bubble tea if you like, your choice, just let me give you a little something in return for saving my ass.” He tried a little smile, actually enjoying the thought of taking the other out now that he had gotten out of his head and really looked at him and his well behaved manner. It would be nice to see him again under different circumstance that weren’t as dramatic like an almost-car-accident.

Cocking his head aside, Jimin giggled softly. “Or we can do all of that. For saving your ass I do deserve some more than a coffee right and I am not sure if I can smell coffee anymore.” He pulled at his shirt again that was awfully sticking to his chest. Before his angel instincts and morals could kick in and while ignoring all of the rules there were, Jimin agreed. His heart took a leap, his breath got stuck somewhere in his lungs and he had to bite his lip to keep from smiling. “Meet me here at eight then. Tomorrow?” Before he turned around, he added with a shy smile, “I’m Jimin, by the way.”

“Yeah, sure, that… that’ll work.” Before Namjoon could properly wrap his head around it Jimin had said yes, fixed them a date and then flirtatiously told him his name. As Jimin already knew his there was no point in telling him and Namjoon wasn’t sure if he should tell him anyways or if it would be stupid so he just stood there, smiling awkwardly giving Jimin a little wave while thinking that it was totally fitting that someone so soft looking had such a pretty name.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

What was he doing? Had he just agreed to a coffee date with a human? To a human he was supposed to protect. It was like the moment their broke eye-contact and Namjoon turned around Jimin came back to his senses. He had acted completely selfish and ignored every rule there was. Yes, maybe he had supposed to keep Namjoon safe and in emergencies it was allowed to use their human form but…he should have been back in the realm already, back to his natural form. Not talk and flirt with his protectee. Or agree on dates. Jimin was just hoping Yoongi hadn’t been around to see the mess that conversation just was. What even had happened? Jimin raked a hand through his hair in a desperate manner and took a deep breath. It took him two steps before something made him stop. Slowly, his eyes wandered up the white jeans that was held up by grey suspenders and white shirt underneath. “You know I always loved those grey tones on you…” Jimin tried a smile, when he came face to face with Yoongi, but it fell soon after, “I can explain!”

“Stop flirting! You won’t be able to flirt your way out of it this time, Park Jimin! What in heaven’s name where you thinking? I get that you had to save him and thank you for not letting my protectee die by the way but why on earth did you do it like this?” Yoongi had found it funny when Jimin had materialized to save Namjoon and then had that awkward conversation with him because Yoongi had been convinced that Jimin would say goodbye quickly, then return to their realm to take a breather and then finally tell Yoongi that he had been right all along and Namjoon was unprotectable. He had not expected Jimin of all people to break the rules. Jimin was soft and sweet and took pride in following the rules nicely to make everything work perfectly as it was supposed to be. This wasn’t it. And the worst thing was: Jimin knew all this. And he had broken the rules nonetheless, on purpose. Yoongi felt like someone had shaken his world so everything had been tumbling around to rearrange in some totally confusion way.

“I…ehm…I just wanted to be nice?” Jimin answered, ignoring the woman who just passed him and looked at him as if he was crazy for talking to thin air. She couldn’t see Yoongi. “It’s all part of my plan, okay!”

Yoongi scoffed.

“Trying to be nice? Your.. your plan? Jimin, you do remember that I know you and that we are both angels and therefore you can’t lie to me because I literally feel when you’re trying to bullsh.. to dupe me and.. what is your plan then? Just for kicks, tell me your plan. What will you say when he asks you where you’re from? What you’re doing here? What your job is? If you to can see each other again. Do you want to break his heart? Or get yourself tangled in too many lies until it’s too late and you’ll have to face the consequences? This is not a game Jimin. This is someone’s life your toying with!”

“Since when are you the one scolding me?” Jimin pouted, averting his gaze to the ground as he just kept on walking. “I might have not thought about that, yet but I can come up with something that makes sense without lying. I just want to protect him, and I figured if he doesn’t listen to his inner voice…then he has to…to my human voice, you know?” Jimin was gesturing around with his hands, “Break his heart? It’s not like he asked me out on a date or something. He just wants to say thanks and although it is my job…it can be nice to get a thanks from time to time, right?”

Yoongi sighed unnerved. Apparently Jimin wasn’t going to let this go easily. So he grabbed him by the arm and pulled him forwards, effectively an forcefully pulling him into the heavenly spheres where they could talk to each other properly without taking the stupid route of Jimin talking to air and Yoongi yelling soundlessly at him. Jimin gasped painfully, when he fell against Yoongi. Wings on full display again, his aura shining just as brightly as ever but Jimin wavered still. Every beat of his heart hurt, and the angel felt dizzy from the sudden change of realms that he wasn’t prepared for. “Ouuuw, that hurt.” Blinking his eyes, a couple of times, Jimin kept himself steady against Yoongi.

“You are not good at lying Jimin, you know that. Also why should he listen to you, he doesn’t know you it might even make him suspicious again if you try to manipulate his decisions.“ He yanked at a loose feather in Jimin’s wings that was about to fall out and then shook his head. “You know what I mean. He doesn't trust easily any more. Abusing his trust or making him feel like you played him or lied to him will break his heart if he loves you as a friend, a love or not at all wont matter there.”

“Since when…,” Jimin took another deep breath, “Do you care about sticking to rules so much, hm?” Jimin slowly stretched out his wings and looked at his friend, “I don’t want to break his heart, Yoongi, trust me. I just want him to get better. He’s got chaos all around and he needs someone to organize it so that he can take a breather. Namjoon never stops working and that’s why he’s never in the moment but always overthinking, overanalyzing and…” Jimin sighed, “I know you know all of this. I am sorry.” Tears dwelled in the corner of his eyes but Jimin ignored them. “You know I would never hurt a human. I’d rather hurt myself.”

“Don’t do this Minnie...” Yoongi’s voice turned soft and he loosened his hold around the youngers wrist to caress up his arm in a gentle gesture. “Don’t talk like that about yourself, as if you were worth less. You aren’t. And I’m not so adamant about the rules because I want you to be flawless - I’m just a little scared that you might have gotten yourself in on over your head. I don’t want anyone having to face uncomfortable consequences, and that applies to Namjoon as much as it does to you. You know I care about you.”

Jimin nodded, patting Yoongi’s chest softly, “It was just a tiny mistake.” The angel hugged Yoongi tightly, needing the physical reassurance right now and placed a kiss on his cheek. “I know you do and now please, go and watch over Jungkook. He always needs help at night.” When Yoongi still didn’t move, Jimin crossed his arms in front of his chest, “Oh come on. He’s just a protectee in the end. A client. A human. It’s not like I will risk my life for him.”

Yoongi hesitated for a second, contemplating if he would terribly regret it, if he let Jimin go his way now. However there was no way to see into the future and so he could only hope that it would turn out as it should be.

Time would show if it had been the right decision - or not.

A/N: A new story is starting! Yay! What do you think so far? Was it a good idea of Jimin to change protectees? Or will he run into trouble ;) We will find out....... THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SUPPORTING OUR FICS SO MUCH ;; Cat and I are always so in awe. Thank you thank you thank you ♡♡♡♡

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faunahudson · 4 years

Text

Who: Fauna & Sawyer Hudson @sawyer-hudson

When: 8th December 2020

Where: The Hudson Apartment

What: Fauna and Sawyer fight over what happened between Finn and Alexis

Warnings: They yell at eachother? Negative Thoughts

Sawyer had felt anger bubbling inside him since speaking to Finn. He didn't care who it was -- even if it was Fauna's best friend -- he wouldn't let anyone speak to his brother this way. "You need to tell Alexis she's way too fucking out of line this time." Sawyer suddnely snapped at Fauna, surrounded by various fabrics and notepads for their upcoming ball, too angry to think about his tone in the moment. "She needs to learn people aren't her own personal play-things she can do what she wants with before she throws them away."

Fauna had been worrying her lip since they'd heard about Alexis and Finn's falling out, she felt bad that she'd continued to let Alexis not address her feelings. She should have sat the other girl down and helped her sooner, got her to talk things through or at least suggested that she talk about them with her therapist. She was about to express this, when Sawyer suddenly snapped at her. The submissive blinked, shocked that he had spoken to her in that tone. It made her feel odd inside, something stirring and her face went from surprise to anger very quickly. "Excuse me? I don't need to do fucking anything. It sounds like she's really hurting if she snapped at him like that. She's made it clear that the two of them are D/s and it's not her fault he's more involved. She's actually a very sensitive person."

A part of Sawyer wanted to apologise for the way he snapped, knowing his anger sometimes got the better of him, and he'd work on it better -- joining her in therapy, meditation, whatever seemed the best fit -- but he couldn't really think straight either, not when his brother was hurting so much all because of Alexis St. James, who people worshipped the ground she walked on because of the family she was born into. Who pretended she was better than her relatives, but turned out to be even worse. They were clueless, sure, but she was careless. "She made it clear?" He repeated, incredously, "She made it fucking clear? Fauna, she came to our house for Thanksgiving, she met our Mom, she let him take him on dates -- does that sound like just D/s shit to you? Or are you also thinking Finn's stupid for reading into it as something more?"

If he hadn't snapped at her maybe Fauna would have been able to think more clearly to admit Alexis' fault slightly, to have had the mature dicussion that they'd usual have. But he was being aggressive and she only knew two ways to deal with that, either she could go to Belfast zoo until he was done or she could fight fire with fire. And she couldn't go to Belfast Zoo without him anymore, Sawyer was not her father she did not cower before him. "You have no idea what they said to one another, you are just making assumptions. You just have it in your head for some reason that she was out to get him, when she's dated one person in the entire time you've known her. How dare you put words in my mouth, or hers. She came to your house because he invited her. You invited Rory, didn't mean he thought you were dating." She argued, standing hands on her hips.

"Yes but I am also not fucking Rory, am I?" Sawyer snapped, probably more harsher than he had meant to, but genuinely frustrated that she was either incidentally or purposefully not getting the point he was trying to make. "I know enough. About Finn, about Alexis, and about how she was bad news from day one! And, speaking of Rory," He said, letting out a mirthless bark of a laugh, "If it were him involved, would you even think of defending Alexis right now? Are you so fucking blinded by her, you're willing to ignore your own morals because she's a 'sensitive person'?"

"I really don't know who you think you're talking to if I'm fucking honest." Fauna snapped back. "You know shit all because I know shit all. How dare you say she was bad news from day one, you don't know her at all. I don't know where this weird vendetta against her has come from, people are allowed to have non romantic D/s relationships that if they want to and sometimes things get twisted. Because sometimes non romantic D/s can be committed, people get claimed into none romantic claims. Maybe Finn saw dates and Alexis saw getting to know one another. But you won't hear it for whatever fucked up reason." Fauna defended fiercely trying not to let tears bloom in her eyes at this fight she was having with her Dominant. "But Rory isn't involved is he? It's Finn, and you're the one who's fucking blind."

"I think I'm talking to my submissive who's being fucking stubborn about it all!" Sawyer yelled, throwing his hands up in defeat, annoyed at this aggravating argument, annoyed at the way Fauna was speaking to him, annoyed at how he was speaking to her most of all. "I don't have a weird vendetta against her, Fauna. I am just the only fucking person in this place who sees her for what she is. And yes, this is about Finn, my brother, who I will do anything to protect, and look after. And if he saw dates, it's on her for not correcting him sooner!" He stormed away, grabbing a random assortment of items; his keys, phone, momentarily considering his gym bag but too wound up to faff about with it. "I can't fucking do this, Fauna. I can't." He said, his voice gruff, clenching his fists so he didn't do something idiotically stereotypical and irreparable, like punching the wall.

"You're not talking to anyone actually, you're yelling at me and nobody gets to yell at me." Fauna snapped back, tears starting to glisten in the corner of her eyes though she wiped them away angrily with the sleeve of her sweatshirt. "I can't fucking believe you just said that. You don't see anything and you assume everything. She's my best friend, my person and it's on him just as much as her because they're fucking adults Sawyer. He's not a damn child." She managed to get out, her heart clenching nastily as he picked up his things. The insecure girl inside her wanted to beg him not to leave, not to walk away from her when he was angry. Because she was scared, that if she let him go out of the door that he wouldn't come back. "Then don't do this." Was all she said, turning away from him.

Sawyer had a lot more to say, to scream, to yell. About how she let everyone yell at her and treat her like shit before he came along, Alexis included, about how he couldn't look out for his brother, but she could baby hers to give her peace at mind? About how she always had to be right and he never could. All of these horrible thoughts whirring weren't Sawyer, he reminded himself, his therapist's words in his head. They were manifestations of the feelings and emotions he had difficulty accepting, his own self-worth disappearing, a dark contortion of himself in his mind, taunting him in Tommy De Luca's voice about all he did was get angry and lose people. Fucking up and hurting others. You might as well say it, Sawyer, you've already lost her. Let her show the real you. Another voice, that sounded like Carole, tried to soothe him, to tell him he was valid in his feelings, but these thoughts were best to discuss in a calm manner than hurling at each other like bullets across the room. It felt like he and Fauna stared at each other in tense silence for years, and she eventually turned away from him. "I won't," He said simply, unlocking the door before turning back briefly. "This isn't a fucking movie, Fauna. This isn't some fantasy where the phrase hurt people hurt people means she's going to see the error of her ways and all is forgiven. Just because you consider yourself a fuck up doesn't give you the excuse to fuck things up. But I'm done. I'm fucking done." And with that, he slammed the door, probably intentionally he thought to himself, and stormed off to see Finn.

She waited. She waited for him just for a moment to grab her or tell her to get on her fucking knees. Because of course he could yell at her, of course he could tell her what to do. He was her dominant, and she was disobedient, and rude and all the things that Percy had accused her of being. But he didn’t, he didn’t demand her submission, he didn’t try to intimidate her he just told her that he wouldn’t do it. The nastier voice in her head, the one that sounded like Percy, like Harold, even like herself sometimes told her that it’s because he couldn’t be bothered with her. And the sad part of herself that had always bowed to those voices wanted to get on her knees to say she was sorry. But the other stronger voice told her that no, he couldn’t yell at her because Alexis had allegedly done wrong and he wasn’t allowed to talk about her friend like that. So she stood her ground, her heart aching because he’d never looked at her like that. She didn’t have a good response to what he’d said, but she also refused to let out the sob in the back of her throat until he was gone. When the door slammed behind him, she broke down. Sobbing in the middle of their stupid ball fabric. Tearing a stupid heart that they had cut out of her dress material off the board and throwing it at the wall. She had known this would happen somehow she told herself, she’d known that something was going to go wrong and she was right.

#(( adventures with sawyer ))#your parents fight while you play dance dance revolution on the wii

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personasintro · 5 years

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Insecure | pjm [oneshot]

synopsis; You’re insecure about your scar and Jimin — your boyfriend is there to change that.

warnings: strong language, fingering, protected sex

genre: fluff, smut

words count: 2.8k

A/N: This one is requested and is kind of short, but I hope you like it!

MASTERLIST

Looking at your reflection in the mirror, you bite the inside of your cheek as you feel self consciousness creeping its way out. You grip the hem of your T-shirt tightly as you’re too disgusted to even touch the awful scar on your stomach. You wish it’d look like your two other scars which are barely visible for you or anyone else to see. You know your health is on the first place, without discussion. But you’re dealing with your insecurity ever since you first saw that ugly scar. No matter how many people tell you it’s not that bad it doesn’t change the fact how you feel about it. You’re not comfortable in your own skin and you wish you could be. Hearing the rustling on your bed you quickly cover your stomach looking at the blonde hair peeking out. Jimin slowly opens his one eye his hand touching the place beside him — the place where you laid just minutes ago. He opens his both eyes searching for you. As his eyes adverts to you he slowly smiles waving at you. You chuckle already making your way to the bed.

“Hey, beautiful.” He says with his raspy voice as he already reaches for you. He quickly pulls you to him and you hum as you feel his warmth on your back.

“Hey.” You mumble closing your eyes for a second.

“What were you doing?” He asks as he’s not really used to wake up in an empty bed without you by his side.

“Nothing,” You lie. “I had to pee.” You mumble as the awful image of your scar invades your mind. You haven’t really said anything Jimin about your insecurity. You’ve always just covered your stomach praying he wouldn’t see it. Maybe he wouldn’t find you beautiful anymore — just like you feel about yourself.

“Hmm, did you pee well?” He asks as you scrunch your brows in confusion, and amusement.

“Did you just ask me that?” You ask disgusted as he laughs into your shoulder. His hand slowly touches your stomach and you tense. You’re too scared he’ll pull your T-shirt up and he’d feel it on his fingertips. Instead he just lays it there while he nuzzles his nose into your hair.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of your scent,” He murmurs as he inhales you causing you to giggle. “So, I was thinking...” He starts as he suddenly pulls away as he sits up. You lay on your back pulling blanket over you. He doesn’t pay attention as he wipes his face trying to get rid of his puffy eyes and face. You giggle at seeing his chubby cheeks and swollen eyes and lips. He looks so cute. “We could go to the beach today. It’s really hot and sunny today.” He suggests as you already dislike the idea.

“I don’t know...” You say not fully convinced as he furrows his brows.

“We haven’t been there for ages, it used to be our place.” He pouts at you. Yes, it used to be — when you had beautiful body and not ruined it by a scar.

“Okay.” You mumble praying you still have that one piece swimwear in your closet.

The water droplets slowly dripping down Jimin’s abs as he slowly walks to you. You appreciate your view as you bite into your lip. He obviously sees you as cocky grin appears on his lips. There are a group of girls not so far away from you — gawking at your boyfriend as he literally looks like model. Sorry girls, he is mine. You think as he walks up to you stopping right where you’re laying on a towel. He kneels beside you giving you a kiss. You smile happily into the kiss. He pulls away sitting next to you as he reaches for sun cream. You think he’ll put it on him since he just came from the water but instead you feel his hands on your thighs as he slowly massages the cream into your skin.

“What are you doing?” You ask, leaning onto your elbows curiously watching his hands.

“I told you to put your sun screen, you’ll burn later.” He simply comments as he keeps massaging the sun scream into your whole legs. You only sigh, enjoying the little massage he’s giving you. When he’s finished he throws the sun cream next to your beach bag. You sit up beside him simple enjoying the waves. It’s peaceful even though the beach is quite packed. But it feels like it’s just the two of you. There is a group of girls, probably those who kept gawking at your boyfriend, walking passed by you. They show their amazing looking stomachs and you simply advert your eyes to yours — which is covered with your swimsuit. Thank god, you’ve found it.

You fumble with your fingers wishing you’d have a body like them. “Hey, what happened?” Your boyfriend asks slowly as he sees your head down. He puts his hand onto your back in caring manner as he looks worried.

“Nothing.” You answer looking at him with smile. He smiles back, although squinting his eyes at you. He doesn’t believe you. But he doesn’t say a word simply leaning for a kiss which you gladly give him.

When you come home, you go to take a shower right after. The salty water from the sea dried on your skin makes you uncomfortable. You take a peaceful shower, probably with too much of hot water but that’s just the way you like it. You wrap your towel around your naked body as bathroom door opens. Jimin’s hair is almost all dried — since he took a shower before you. You walk up to the mirror you’ve above bathroom sink. Slowly taking off your black hair tie you let your hair fall onto your shoulders. Luckily it didn’t get wet, something you’ve always felt annoyed about. When you went for a swim back at the beach, you put your hair up so it wouldn’t get wet and you wouldn’t have to wash it again since you’ve washed your hair yesterday. Jimin walks behind you touching your hips as you tense. You quickly grab the little knot in your towel tighter so it wouldn’t fall.

Jimin sees it as he watches you through mirror. You can see the way his brows scrunch as he gives kiss to your naked shower. He feels his shower gel on your skin but he doesn’t say anything about you using it. He doesn’t mind this kind of stuff but he would definitely tease you. Maybe he’ll, later. He slowly grabs your hips as you can’t seem to relax your body. “Baby, what’s happening?” He asks suddenly, not stepping away. He looks at you in the mirror with sadness in his eyes.

“What are you talking about?” You ask with fake chuckle but he doesn’t chuckle back. He simply stares at you as you gulp.

“Why do you keep hiding from me?” He asks hurt as you slowly close your eyes not being able to say anything to him. You want to. But the big lump in your throat isn’t allowing you. He carefully and slowly turns you around, the edge of the sink boring into your lower back. “Am I doing something wrong? You don’t find me attractive anymore?” He suddenly asks which causes you to snap your head at him. He sees the confusion in his eyes as he sighs. “We haven’t had sex for a few weeks. Ever since you had surgery. And I get it, I don’t want to push you into anything. I just feel like... you’re tensing everytime I try to touch you. Do you not love me anymore?” He asks. The way he says it makes you feel like an asshole. He looks at you with sadness in his eyes as his tone is soft and hurt. You’re such an asshole, Y/N.

You think as you shake your head at him. “I love you so much, Jimin. Don’t ever question that.” You say sternly to him as he nods. I just don’t love myself. You want to say but you stop yourself. Jimin is the most caring person you know. As soon as you’d tell him those words he’d go into over loving and protective boyfriend mode. Constantly reminding you otherwise.

“Then why are you avoiding my touch?” He asks hopelessly as he caress your cheek.

“I’m not avoiding your touch, Jimin.” You mutter as you lie right through your teeth. The hurt flashes through his eyes one more time as he touches your hips once again. You automatically tense gripping the knot on your towel once again. He scoffs chuckling bitterly.

“Stop lying,” He isn’t rude, he says it almost pleadingly. You don’t deserve him. “Am I doing something wrong?”

“You don’t do anything wrong, Jimin. It’s me.” You sigh as you pray he’d just leave you alone. You feel very vulnerable with only your towel hiding you. One move and he’d be able to snatch the towel revealing your naked body — most importantly your scar.

“Please, stop lying to me. You said you love me.” He almost begs as you bite your lip trying not to cry.

“I do, I really do.”

“Then why do you do this?” He raises his voice, obviously frustrated by you. He’s never like this and you did this with him. Because you’re too insecure to tell him the truth.

“Because I don’t love myself!” You snap at him as he widens his eyes. Maybe it caused your voice — or maybe your words. Who knows.

“What?” He asks dumbfounded, wondering if he heard you right. But you only sigh looking down at your legs.

“Do you honestly want to know the truth?” You ask quietly, vulnerably causing Jimin to wondering what’s this about. He nods waiting for you to continue. You slowly let down your towel revealing your completely naked body. Jimin’s eyes already attached to your curves and everything, as his eyes fall on your scar.

“I may be really smart, but I’ve no idea what this is about.” He looks at your eyes as you’re the one who’s dumbfounded right now.

“This.” You say as you point to your scar on your stomach. Jimin looks at it as he raises his brow.

“And? It’s a scar.” He shrugs as you open your mouth.

“It’s ugly!” You exclaim looking at it with disgust.

“You’re overacting. It’s nowhere near ugly. You can barely see it.” He says as he slowly traces his fingers across it. You don’t flinch this time, maybe because his reaction wasn’t the one you thought it would be.

“I feel so fucking ugly and insecure with it. I thought you wouldn’t want me if you see it.” You mumble as he snaps his head at you scoffing.

“Gosh, you’re so stupid sometimes,” He shakes his head amusingly as you slap his chest. He only smiles tucking his finger under your chin so you’d look at him. “I kind of get why would you get insecure. But what about me? I love you no matter what and I don’t care how many scars you’ve. You fell in love with me when I had my chubby cheeks and super crooked tooth.” He says as you smile at the image of adolescent Jimin.

“I loved your crooked tooth and chubby cheeks which disappeared.” You say to him as he chuckles at you.

“And I love you with or without scars. This shit doesn’t matter to me. You only matter.” He says as he leans his forehead against yours. He kisses you softly bringing your naked body to him.

“It’s just... those two aren’t that visible but this one,” You say pointing to the scar. “You can see it.”

He sighs as he suddenly grabs your wrist taking you to the bedroom. He lays you down onto his bed as you’re curiously looking at him. “What are you doing?” You say as you lay there all naked. Jimin smiles at the though how you’re not hiding yourself or your scar.

“I’m going to make a love to you,” He says casually already stripping down his sweatpants he put not a long time ago. “I’m going to show you how beautiful you are.” He says as he crawls above you kissing your neck. His lips slowly trails down your neck as he lightly sucks your skin there. You moan out when his fingers lightly touch your slit. He plays with your clit causing you to arch your back and he smirks at that. His lips continue way down to your chest near your scar. You hold you breath as you feel his gazing over your scar. You’re ready to lean onto your elbows to see what he’s doing just when you feel his lips on your scar. He even pulls his fingers away, giving attention to your scar only. He pecks your scar over and over again until he starts to suck the skin their. You wonder how he doesn’t feel disgusted with that but then you remember — he loves you. And you relax into his touch as he starts to rub your clit once again. This time you’re way more wet than before. He doesn’t say anything about it, like he always use to do. Instead he goes back up kissing you passionately.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, I wish you could see it sometimes.” He murmurs against your skin as he inserts his two fingers. You gasp against his lips as your walls slowly stretch, swallowing his fingers.

“Jimin...” You gasp as he smiles kissing you once again. “I need you,” You say against his lips as he only hums. You touch his chest pushing him slightly away. The look of confusion crosses his face as you bite into your lip. “I need you, like, right now.” You say eyes adverting to his bulge. The rush of realization hits him.

“But I—I wanted to—“

“Jimin, just fuck me.” You plead as he laughs at your straightforwardness already stripping down his boxers. His length spring free and you reach for it wanting nothing more than to feel the velvety skin. But he slaps your hand away and you gasp at him.

“You wanted me to fuck you,” He arches his brow and you groan at him. “I won’t fuck you,” He continues as little frown appears on your lips. “I said I’ll make love to you right now. I can fuck you later.” He says as he reaches to his night stand pulling out condom. He unwraps it as he pulls it over his length hovering over you once again. He kisses you, his plump lips staying on yours as he slowly pushes into you. You gasp into his lips as he continues. When he’s all inside he let’s you to adjust his size and you impatiently raise your hips letting him know you’re ready. This takes him by surprises, since you haven’t had sex since your surgery. But he continues as you wish, starting to thrust in. The room is filled with your moans and gasp as Jimin occasionally groans. The feel of your slick and velvety walls around him is causing him to see stars.

“Fuck, I love you so fucking much.” He gasps as he hits rougher, his balls hitting your ass. You arch your back already feeling tightening around him ever more. He can feel you’re close and he picks up his pace as he lightly bites into your neck. He holds your hips so you’re not moving too much from him and you grab his biceps hard.

“I love you.” You moan out as he rolls his hips causing you to clench around him letting your climax to take over you. His thrusts starts to get sloppy — your walls clenching around him even more makes his stomach tighten in pleasure. Soon he follows you right after, spilling his load into the condom. He thrusts couple of more times before pulling out. He quickly pulls of the condom, wrapping it up before tossing it into his small bin. He quickly lays back right next to you pulling you into his hold.

His hand touches your scar, but this time you don’t flinch away. You simple smile still feeling his lips on it. He kisses you on your cheek. “I really hope you won’t be insecure about it anymore. Scars can be beautiful, you know? They make you special.” He murmurs as he keeps caressing your scar.

You only hum still thinking you’d look better without it, although you don’t feel to insecure about it. Jimin is right. They do make you special. As you go to put some pajamas on, you see your reflection in the mirror.

Smiling when you see love bites all over your scar as Jimin filled it with his love, you lightly touch it. And the most beautiful thing is — that you don’t feel disgusted about it anymore.

#bts #park jimin #jimin x reader #bts smut #bts au #방탄소년단 #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #bts fluff

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