#incorrect harley

[bruciemilf]

no I'm not biased abt Bruce. Where'd you get that idea

[gothamundernightlight]

Incorrect Batfam Quotes

*Harley trying to cheer up Robin

Harley: Don’t worry, you’re going to be fine.

Harley: You come from a strong line of lunatics!

Damian: *thinking of his family history, from both sides

Damian: That is actually quite reassuring???

[confused-wanderer]

Dick: Hey guys what’s up?

Damian: Silence! this is a debate I intend to win.

Dick: huh?

Jason *eating popcorn* : You’re gonna wanna see this

Tim: BY FAR IT IS ONLY LOGICAL TO ASSUME-

Steph: LOGIC HAS NO PART YOU’RE JUST BIASED

Jason: They’re fighting over who was the loosest cannon Robin which caused the most chaos

Dick:

Dick *reaches for popcorn*

Jason *slaps his hand* : Nuh-uh Goldie only the one with the title of MOST CHAOTIC ROBIN gets to eat popcorn

Tim: YOU ARE A LITERAL ASSASSIN WHOS TRIED TO MURDER SEVERAL PEOPLE

Damian: REMIND ME OF YOUR BODYCOUNT?!

Dick: what now-

Drake: THAT WAS BARELY ANY AS ROBIN

Steph: Dudes I was literally Robin to piss off my dad and became friends with poison ivy and Harley

Jason: You’re all just competing for second place

Dick: .. wait what about me?

Everyone *stops and stares*

Damian: Nightwing, this is serious

Tim: Yeah dude I remember your reputation as Robin and you haven’t changed

Batman: .. are you all done with the bust?

Steph: BATSY! Just who we want to see! So.. tell us, who was the most chaotic robin ever

Batman *without hesitation* : Nightwing

Penguin *tied up after the bust* : Yeah it was blue

Damian:

Tim:

Steph:

Jason:

Dick *steals popcorn* : Y’all better start putting respect on my damn name

[incorrectbatfam]

Harley: I'll never talk!

Bruce, sharpening knife: I have ways of making people talk.

Harley:

Bruce: *cuts a piece of cake*

Harley: ...Can I have some?

Bruce: Cake is for talkers.

[marshmallow---pillow]

Harley, with a recently-renewed psychiatry degree: So you take any recreational drugs or drinks in excess?

Bruce: No

Harley: *writes Big Nerd on her chart and underlines it three times*

[source]

[bandersnatchbandwidth]

an @incorrect-hs-quotes that made me laugh

[batfamgalore]

*Dick, undercover in Arkham*

Harley Quinn: Dick, what are you doing here?

Dick: Life, Harley. I killed a guy.

*stares*

Dick: Nah, I’m just undercover. I’m gonna bust out tomorrow.

[satoshy12]

Harley "And you can use it!"

Harley was done explaining how to use the hammer. Dani was smiling! She really liked to learn new things.

Dani, as she left to search for a new playmate, said, "Thanks, Granny Selina, Granny Ivy, and Harley!"

All 3: "Granny!!!"

+

Later, in a spa.

Ivy: "We aren't old, right?"

Harley:" Yeah, it must have been a mistake."

Bruce Wayne, who was kidnapped and forced to pay for Gotham Sirens beauty treatment: " Old?"

Harley: "Yeah, the tiny one we helped call called us!"

Ivy: "She called us Granny Harley, Granny Selina, and Granny Ivy! Why!"

Bruce:" Maybe in a nice family way?"

Selina:" That isn't a nice family way! We are still young!"

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

VRISKA: You ever had a racist experience 8ut it was funny tho?

ARADIA: campus p0lice caught my asian ass stealing chairs fr0m the starbucks and i said "we need these f0r the math meet" and they just let me g0 and i finally had chairs f0r my balc0ny 0u0

JADE: im kanaka maoli (native hawaiian) and in high school i was put in some kind of group for native kids?? it was run by a white woman who told us that if we were ever in class and feeling overwhelmed, we had permission to just up and leave class to go wander around outside and reconnect with nature. we all took advantage of this regularly :)

ARADIA: the implicati0n she th0ught y0u were like f0rest fairies that had t0 peri0dically c0nnect with nature t0 regain y0ur strength is the m0st... racist but als0 kinda funny thing ive ever heard???

DAVE: ok wait ive got one so i wouldnt call this racism but my white ass grew up in a vastly predominantly hispanic area and one time in high school one of my classmates stuck a cold can of coke to the back of my neck and i was so tired from lack of sleep that i didnt flinch or acknowledge it

DAVE: and in a perfect impression of steve irwin he said "tHERE ARE SUBTLE DIFFERENCES IN THE SOUR CREAM FOLK, aMAZINGLY THEY SEEM TO HAVE NO CONCEPT OF COLD, tHIS ADAPTATION COMES AT THE COST OF BURSTING INTO FLAMES WHEN THEY SEE THE SUN, sAD,"

VRISKA: LMFAO????????

[galacticcosmologist]

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 <- links should start working as posts leave the queue

[mirmalade49]

[bruciemilf]

Damian: Baba, I've brought a new member into the family. His name is Raul The Rat. Would you like to hold him?

Bruce, who's scared out of his skin of rats: yes

Damian: Excellent. Mama?

Talia, who's even MORE scared: yes my precious child of course

[gothamundernightlight]

Incorrect Batfam Quotes

Bruce: That's an interesting shirt. Who's on it?

Harley: *wearing a tee shirt that says “Fuck the Joker”

Harley: No idea.

Bruce: Oh. Where's it from?

Harley: I don't know, I stole it.

Bruce: I’m begging you, please tell me before I find a shipment of them on my front porch from my son.

Jason: *appearing from nowhere

Jason: Too late.

[headcanonthings]

Tony, texting Harley while in a meeting: Call me in five minutes and say I gotta come get you.

Harley: On a scale of 1 to 10, what kind of emergency is this.

Tony: 10, get me out of here.

Harley: Put me on speaker, I'll even start crying.

[incorrectbatfam]

Selina: Reasons why Halloween is the best holiday?

Ivy: You're not obliged to visit your relatives.

Crane: You're not obliged to get gifts for anyone.

Harley: People will give you candy for absolutely no reason other than Halloween.

Cobblepot: It's the only day where it's socially acceptable to go out in public dressed like a penguin.

[coolcoolcoolbutwtf]

Joker junior isn't the only kid in the joker's gang anymore.

Harley: This is your new babysitter I mean older brother, You know Mr.J and I can't just spend all our time with you Junior. Why don't you and Trixter get yourselves introduced while playing somewhere away from here, Kay bye!

Trixter(Danny): ...

JJ:...

Trixter(Danny): I like your nails they are pretty.

JJ: *growling and hissing*

...

Harley tugging the child leach with junior in it: it don't bite.

Danny: Yes it do!