#incorrect supersons

[ryemiffie]

Some of me and my bro as super sons incorrect quotes:

Damian: So in theory, since this animal hide is the most similar to a human, this is the same texture a human's skin would be if burnt to this extreme extent.

Jon: That's cool. Now you look at my Ninjago cards, this is my lord Garmadon card-

[d33zn33tz]

Jon: I punched a guy and hurt my knuckles :(

Damian: What happened?

Jon: He was being uncomfortably touchy!!

Damian: ah. That's fair.

Damian: I would have stabbed him.

Jon: I am aware you would have, but punching him was enough for me.

Damian: That's good.

[dawnlovesquotes]

Jon: Only geniuses will say these words quickly: Eye, yam, stew, peed.

Damian: What the- Who’s gonna fall for tha-

Don: IAMSTUPID.

Damian: ...

Jon: ...

Damian: ... why do I even bother.

[incorrectbatfamandfriends]

Bruce: Why are you two fighting?

Damian: Kent keeps insisting I’m a clone.

Clark: Jon now that’s not very nice.

Jon: But it’s true. He was made the same Connor was, and everyone calls him a clone.

Clark: Well it’s different-

Jon: How?

Bruce: Yeah Clark, how?

*Outside, ten minutes later, as Bruce and Clark argue*

Tim: This was the best idea we’ve ever had.

Kon: Totally.

Damian: Tt, I believe we are owed payment?

[gothamundernightlight]

Incorrect Batfam Quotes

*Clark reading Jon a bedtime story

Clark: And then he heard an ominous “wheee” from the vents.

Jon: *gasp

Damian: *in the vents

Damian: …wheee.

Clark: *startled

Clark: Damian, I’ve told you before, our HVAC system is not a good place for stalking people!

Clark: Also, what are you doing in my house?

[headcanonthings]

Damian: Do you value your family? You should.

Damian: Father- six dollars.

Damian: Todd- two dollars.

Damian: Drake - negative seven dollars.

Damian: Cain - four dollars.

Damian: Grayson- five dollars.

Jon: Rude, but actually, all of my family are priceless.

Damian: Yeah, well mine are worth ten dollars collectively.

[devine-fem]

Jon: I’m… I think I like boys and girls… romantically.

Damian, raising an eyebrow: I thought so, not gonna lie.

Jon: What- What? How?

Damian: When I play out the scene in my head of someone trying to kiss you then I can’t imagine you rejecting them regardless of who they might be. You’re too nice.

Jon, offended: What? That’s not true. I wouldn’t just let anyone-

*One very sudden and drawn out kiss from Damian later.*

Jon:

Damian: Jon?

Jon:

Damian: Now you shut up?

Jon:

Damian, completely innocent to his own actions: Well, case and point.

[mcuxhp777]

Jon: You have a cool sword

Damian: Thanks, my mother gave it to me

Jon: That's sweet, Dami

Damian, smiles at Jon and hugs him: Mine

Jason: I'm gonna call Joker to kill me with a crowbar again

Dick: This is scary

Tim: I feel so bad for Jon

Steph: Stop being so dramatic, they're a cute couple

Duke: At least he hasn't threatened to kill anyone

[bat-stuff]

Damian: if you keep doing stuff like this we can't be seen in public together

Jon, who has managed to fit an entire package of marshmallows in his mouth: mhugh?

Damian: Jesus christ spit those out before you choke

[arguablysomaya]

Jon: We had a party for Valentine's day at my school.

Damian: Valentine's Day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and-

Jon: They told us to make cards for the people we cared about, so I made one for you.

Jon: *hands him a card covered with glitter*

Damian:

Damian: tt- thank you.

[bullshitcharacterssay]

Jon: Go to hell!

Damian: Where do you think I come from?

[batfammeetsspidergang]

Damian: Tomorrow is my birthday.

Jon: I got you something great. Want a hint?

Damian: No! You know that I have to be surprised. Remember two years ago, how mad I was when you left my present out for me to find?

Jon: Left it out? It was hidden in a storage locker in Metropolis, which I rented under an assumed name. You bit through a combination lock!

Damian: Well, just make sure that it does not happen again.

[toulousewayne]

Daily Batfam Shenanigans Pt:5

————

Damian:Grayson?

Dick looks over from his spot watching TV and eating Coco Puffs.

Dick:Yes Little Dee?

Damian:You are very aware of my experience with animals.

Dick: Very much so, yes.

Damian:Why does father seem so interested about give me Birds and bees.

Dick laughs for a bit.

Dick: No kiddo, he talking about…the reproductive health.

Damian:…Sex? I know what sex is Grayson Mother gave me this with topic with a diagram and you and the alien are never quiet when I stay at the tower. So I do not see the need for such time constraints.

Dick:…

—————

Jason is in the cave help Tim with his wound care when he notices a large scar on Tim.

Jason: Where’d you get this from Replacement, falling off the handlebars of your bike again?

Tim (Drowsy from medicine ): Oh that, no Ra took my spleen.

Jason:…..The fuck you just say Tim?

——

Oracle is in the ClockTower and is on Coms with Robin who’s patrolling the East end.

Robin: Oracle?

Oracle: Yes, Robin?

Robin:Father, had the talk with me earlier.

Oracle:And how’d that go?

Robin:I think Father needs to take a course on giving the talk he isn’t very good at it.

Oracle (Chuckling): Why do you think that?

Robin: He kept trying to explain anatomy but he didn’t understand women’s. He said I should ask a woman.

Oracle loosing it on the other line.

Robin:Is it that complex?

Oracle gaining her composure: Oh, kiddo you right your father needs help.

Robin: So will you explain—

Oracle: Absolutely not.

————

Duke:Is this safe?

Jason:Most likely not.

Duke:Should we tell someone?

Jason:Probably.

Duke:Are you going to?

Jason: Nope

Alfred in the next room: Whatever you two are about to do, save yourselves the trouble.

—————

Kate: And how did you convince him to do it?

Stephanie & Dick: Bribes

Kate: Okay, so what exactly did you two bribe him with?

Dick(Smirking): That’s highly useful and top secret information.

Jason enters the room in a fuzzy red sweater and approaches Bruce who’s reading a book.

Bruce (Confused): Everything okay Jay?

Jason give Bruce a hug and quickly leaves the the room.

Stephanie (Sobbing): You got the tissues?

Dick hands her a box and dries his own tears.

Kate walking away: This family needs therapy.

————

Damian:……

Tim:Why are you staring at me?

Damian:………

Tim:Did I do something to you,or are you trying out to be one of the twins from the Shining?

Damian:I need you to take me and Jon to see a movie Saturday night.

Tim:You couldn’t have lead with that?!

—————

Barbara: Go Left

Batman & Nightwing go Right

Barbara: No your other left.

Nightwing:That’s the right?

Barbara trying not to scream and rip her hair out.

Barbara: This Family Makes me want to murder people.

Batman: Are we in Pursuit of Riddler Now?

*Oracle Disconnects*

[dc-and-damirae]

conversation between damian and jon be like

damian: I don't dab. I stab.

[jonjaydami]

Breaking down the song too sweet by hozier and literally shoving any dc ship in it. Well mainly any bat x super ship cause honestly I love the idea that the song is from the bats perspective talking about their respective super.

Also I feel the need to make this clear, I do ship superbat, timkon, and Damijon but not all in the same universe. Like no offense to anyone who has written anything containing all three of these ships but I think it's just weird cause it's like man if superbat is canon and then you put damijon it's like Damian and Jonathan are brothers so it just makes me feel weird about the ship at that point. But if they are all in separate fics then I feel like it's fine and I love it.

But anyway! I was writing my newest chapter and on my superbat fanfiction called " does superman cry" (FYI I regret not making the title too sweet or ice tea and tears or something silly like that)

Cause I'm so OBSESSED with Clark having a deep appreciation for ice tea and loving it cause Martha would make it during the summer months and would make it warm during the winter so Kal just always had that bitter sweet tea after a long day of working on the farm.

So Bruce learns about it and he absolutely hates tea. He takes his whiskey neat and coffee in bed at 3 and this man just can't stand the bitter taste. Even with sugar in it he hates it. But after he learns Martha makes it he has Alfred the tea steeping master he is make his own so every time Clark comes over he baits him into drinking a glass.

Especially if he wants Clark to stay longer. He secretly just brings him a glass and Kal the nice boy that he is can never refuse a glass of home made sweet tea.

Eventually they fall into this pattern and even start dating and Bruce finds that he doesn't mind sweet tea as long as it's on Clark's lips when he kisses him. Thats the sweetest tea of all.

Also I'm imagining Clark not actually being a coffee fan and liking tea cause it tastes more like home and the earthy flavor it provides, but he will bring Bruce a steaming cup of coffee just like how he likes it as compensation. Kinda like a trade of sorts ♥️🖤💙💛

[strslv-4sh]

Damian: I showed some weakness today and it was disgusting, I don't recommend it