#Attachment styles

[hisenemy]

aiko :/

[guiltyidealist]

Latest hobby: radical self-acceptance codependency affirmations

I like to use over-the-top edgy imagery to invoke the ~emo~ sentiments we associate with edge, juxtaposing the aggressively self-loving text. accentuates the punk nature of radical acceptance

[theambitiouswoman]

Attachment Styles in Relationships

Attachment styles are the ways people feel and act in relationships, based on their early experiences with parent or guardian. There are four main types:

Secure Attachment:

Healthy: Feeling comfortable with your partner and being able to share your feelings and needs openly. Trusting them and supporting each other without feeling overly worried about the relationship.

Unhealthy: Becoming overly dependent on your partner, feeling anxious or upset if they spend time away, or constantly seeking reassurance and validation.

Anxious Attachment:

Healthy: Expressing your emotions and needs to your partner, and valuing emotional closeness. Feeling secure when your partner reassures you and staying connected during difficult times.

Unhealthy: Constantly worrying about your partner leaving you, feeling jealous and possessive, or becoming too clingy and demanding in the relationship.

Avoidant Attachment:

Healthy: Valuing your independence and personal space while still being supportive and caring toward your partner. Understanding your emotions and expressing them in a balanced way.

Unhealthy: Pushing your partner away emotionally, avoiding discussions about feelings or conflicts, or being emotionally distant and unavailable.

Disorganized Attachment:

Healthy: Recognizing and addressing past traumas, working on building trust and emotional stability.

Unhealthy: Reacting impulsively or unpredictably in relationships due to unresolved traumas, struggling with forming and maintaining deep emotional connections, or experiencing extreme emotional highs and lows.

[wise-falafel]

your boyfriend isn’t texting you back? girl that’s just his avoidant attachment style. actually you should work on your anxious attachment style, wanting your partner to talk to you is definitely not normal.

also, why are you expecting him to do the dishes or give you presents? you know acts of service or gift giving aren’t his love languages. his love language is physical touch, aka sex.

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[ellesimsworld]

Attachment Styles Mod | Sims 4

This mod makes it possible for your Sims to have an attachment style. Read more and download HERE on my Patreon.

#Sims4

[schn-tgai-saavik]

Development of Vulcan attachment styles and in relation to telepathy: an analysis based on human developmental psychology and trek lore - P.1

I have been taking psychology classes in Uni and thinking about the development of attachment in Vulcan culture/civilisation

(Author's note- familial bonding in Vulcans is not exactly plainly stated in any Memory Alpha page, but it seems implied at the very least- either way, I might be borrowing from fanon.)

Attachment, in (human) children, develops toward their primary care-taker from the moment their cognitions allows object permanence, generally solidifying into an attachment structure at ~4-5 years old.

The behaviours from caretakers that encourage the development of a secure attachement style are, according to Boyd and Bee (2015) to keep the child in a calm, safe and non-stressful environment, to not let it cry too long before satisfying their needs, to encourage contact with others and to allow for exploration periods while also ensuring a reassuring and secure presence. Moments of synchrony between the caretaker and very young child allows the child to understand habits, and that their need are met with constancy, building the trust between the child and the caretaker.

Now, depending on these interactions in early childhood, a child can develop one of four internal models of attachments.

Secure attachment: The child will search the proximity of it's attachement figure (primary caretaker) after a separation or a stressful situation and will use it as a base of security when exploring

Anxious-avoidant attachment: The child avoids the contact to it's attachment figure and does not seem to prefer it to other people.

Insecure-ambivalent attachment: The child has a tendency to go on few explorations and seems perturbed when separated from it's attachment figure, but isn't secured when it returns or tries to comfort the child.

Disorganized/disoriented attachment: The child seem confused or afraid, and adopts contradicting behaviours with the attachement figure.

Now, in Vulcans, if we assume attachment is still a part of their development, how does telepathy and familial bonds play into it?

Telepathic bonds developed naturally between parents or close caregivers and children would play a great part in the development of attachment, as the bond would be the best indicator of the child's need, ensuring they are fulfilled. Also, despite Vulcan's general impassivity, such bond would allow them to give emotional feedback to their children, allowing them to feel, rather than see, the love, care, security and reassurance they needed from their parents/caregivers. As the child grows up, it would allow for the explorative behaviours crucial in the development of attachments, with the child being strongly aware of the strong base of security they have with their parents. It is why to outsiders Vulcan child appears more independent and detached, because they physically seek their parents for comfort less, benefiting from a mental reassurance if needed. As the child grows, frequent meld with attachement figures could be used both as displays of affections and as a safe place where the child could express and show their emotions to their parents while they learned to regulate them in the Vulcan way.

Now, what would be the implications of such a method for the development of attachment for a hybrid child like Spock, who might have not been able to naturally bond with his primary caretaker, his mother, a psy-null human, and who had a father we know never melded with him? And for Saavik, a half-romulan who's Vulcan parents likely died when she was very young and whose Romulan parent probably never met, who did not have a stable figure in her life until T'Pren and then lost her, and then only had a proper caregiver when Spock took her in?

Because these two in particular can be good examples of Anxious-Avoidant (Spock, namely in The Naked Time, Amanda's conflicting demands of him in Journey to Babel and the distance with Sarek, and him leaving for Gol when his feelings for Jim grew too much) and Insecure-Ambivalent (Saavik's aggressivity to anyone except Spock when on Symmetry in The Pandora Principle, her feeling still stuck in the events of her past later in her life, which lasted until Hellguard was destroyed.)

There's a lot of potential exploration I might do another time, and maybe this is all wrong because it's human psychology applied to Vulcans, but hey.

[laughroditee]

Pretty positive that Kyle Garrick has the most secure attachment style out of anyone on the 141, proving that he is by far the best boyfriend material.

[bpderanged]

I bite every hand that tries to love me like some rabid dog. Because where I come from, hands were meant to hurt and punish, so how am I supposed to know the difference?

[worldwidewandress]

the baggage

everyone comes into a relationship with baggage. most people drop it when carrying gets heavy. the right person helps you unpack. goes both ways. the question is - are you ready to unpack?

so you're either gonna trip over each other's stuff or you gonna unpack together. there's no other way. once you're ready for the latter, wash the dirty pieces first, handle them with care, then fold them nicely - in a shared closet.

home is built on all the stuff we carry around heavy trying to shake off or run away from, until we're ready to sit with them, unpack carefully, and eventually decorate our space with.

[autopsyfreak]

my attachment style is both anxious and avoidant.

i have a hard time expressing that i care about you but don’t you dare leave me

[incognitopolls]

If you're not familiar with the attachment style model, you can take a quiz here.

–

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[avoidant-attachment-culture]

Avoidant attachment culture blog

This is for those with an avoidant attachment style (dismissive or fearful) to vent, talk about experiences or send in characters that you relate to.

This blog is run by an adult. Minors may follow and interact but be mindful and intentional with your actions.

> Also see @anxious-attachment-culture

Rules

- Open with "(dismissive/fearful) avoidant attachment culture is.." for each ask.

- Do not demean other attachment styles by making negative blanket statements about their nature e.g. "anxious attachers are always x". Avoidants go through this a lot and it does not give you the right to inflict it on others.

- You may submit asks if you only have avoidant tendencies or swing between attachment styles as long as it relates to the experience of being avoidant.

- Do not submit asks talking about avoidant partners/relationships if you are not avoidant yourself.

- You may use sign offs, they will be tagged for filing.

Information posts are here: #informative

Current sign offs

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#🌠🐻

#chorus

#cyprus 👤

#🦕

This is run by >> @evilsystemm <<

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[vickytrix]

it’s just me and my fearful-avoidant attachment style against the world

[anxious-attachment-culture]

Anxious attachment culture blog

This is for those with an anxious attachment style to vent, talk about experiences or send in characters that you relate to.

> Also see @avoidant-attachment-culture

Rules

- Open with "anxious attachment culture is.." for each ask.

- Do not demean other attachment styles by making negative blanket statements about their nature e.g. "avoidant attachers are always x".

- You may submit asks if you only have anxious tendencies or swing between attachment styles (this includes fearful avoidant/disorganized) as long as it relates to the experience of being anxious.

- You may use sign offs, they will be tagged for filing.

This is run by >> @evilsystemm <<

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@narcissisticpdcultureis

@schizotypalpd-culture-is

@aspdculture-is

@hpdcultureis

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@cluster-b-culture-is

@aro-culture-is

@ace-culture-is

@bi-culture-is

@avpdcultureis

@ndcultureis

@ocpd-culture-is-blog

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