#so Tim and Jason have a bonding moment

[onnahu]

Batkids in Metropolis

For context: they have sunglasses on, bc it's Metropolis, and they're fucking Gothamites AND bats so...

Cass: It's so...

Cass: It's so bright here.

Duke: Right? How can anyone live here?

Steph *putting on second pair of sunglasses*: Oh man, it gives me flashbacks.

Tim: Wtf, Steph. Flashbacks to what?

Jason: To death. Duh.

*Steph and Jason high-five*

Dick *just wanted a break from Bruce's bullshit*: Sometimes I hate you so much. Why do everything have to be a death joke to you?

Steph: I don't know what you're talking about...

Steph: I'm dead sirious.

Duke: 1/5, unoriginal.

Steph: Hey!

Damian's home bc he's grounded. He skipped school again. Jason and Tim paughed at him and he's now plotting revenge.

[theerurishipper]

Tim Drake, for no reason at all:

Dick Grayson, Tim's big brother in every conceivable way for the past several years:

[batfambrainrotbeloved]

Bruce Wayne, mentor to many- father to none.

I want the angst of B having to come to terms that he doesn't know ANY of his kids not anymore at least and maybe never and the fact his kids are just- used to it?

Visiting Dicks apartment, he finds a picture of him smiling while surrounded by a bunch of little kids in spandax uniforms. Turns out he'd been a gymnastics instructor for about four years now and his most recent team had everyone qualify for state. (Bruce didn't even know he still practiced)

Jason stopped accepting Wednesday night patrols, but when he looked into it he found out that was the night he went to DND nights with his roommates every week. The roommates he met last semester after he decided to go to college and get an english major. (Bruce didn't even know he had applied)

Checking the library he found a small pedastal plague put up by Alfred displaying just one book. It said Cass was the author. Apparently she had gotten super into writing and published a book talking about language deprivation and lack of accomidation for deaf/hoh children born to hearing families. She had a book signing last month, Alfred had gone and grabbed this copy now on display (Bruce didn't even know she liked to write)

Tim finished a case early and let it slip he needed to sign off early to "meet up with his boyfriends" and hung up before Bruce could process. It only took a small glance at his middle child's latest social media post to see him alongside Superboy (what was his name?) and a blonde boy he didn't recognize. Both were leaned in to kiss his cheek and the caption said "Happy 3rd anniversary!!" (Bruce didn't even know he was interested in boys)

Steph's birthday came around and Bruce got her a new account and shoved a couple thousand for her to buy whatever she wanted. But he quickly noticed a pattern of everyone getting her- cat supplies? Apparently She had adopted a cat about a month ago to celebrate her new apartment, Mister Mystery was his name, and she had asked everyone for supplies instead of other gifts. (Bruce didn't even know she had moved)

He decided on some impromptu father-son bonding and tries to track down his youngest. But Damian is nowhere to be found. He gets pretty close to calling an emergency meeting but the moment he messages Oracle she reminds him Damian is in Chicago. Damian had won an art competition at school and his piece qualified for a gallery spot. The entire family had gone days ago and he was due back the next day. (Bruce didn't even know he cared about art)

Then Duke- his youngest in terms of time spent. But one he had grown fond of just as fast as the others. Especially working the day shift the time they spent was limited. Bruce got them both lunch, but it wasn't until halfway through eating that Duke had turned to him with panicked eyes and asked if the stew had shellfish. Duke had a severe allergy, thankfully Jason had been just up the street and had an epi-pen ready before they took him to Leslies. (Bruce didnt even know he had any allergies, let alone one so severe)

The worst part? There was no blow up. His kids didn't take his idiocracy as a personal insult or even raise a fight. They just rolled their eyes and moved on. As everyone crowded in the room, surrounding Dukes bedside he could hear Barbras voice. "Its not your fault, Batman may be omnipotent, but Bruce doesn't know anything really"

He wasnt meant to overhear or maybe he was, Oracle had always been petty But he couldn't refute it.

"But you have us"

Well- thats just it wasnt it? Even when Bruce was absent- his kids had each other. But was that ever meant to be enough?

[that1emowitch]

Bruce, high on painkillers, is being babysat by Jason. Jason has to do an emergency Red Hood thing, and lacking an alternative, slaps a stock domino on Bruce and drags him along.

Bruce proceeds to say/do the most unhinged shit. The goons are suddenly viscerally aware of where Hood got it from.

WOW okay you guys are unhinged, you know that?

(And I love it <3)

A/N: I fully intended to write a crack fic, but the feels crawled in through the plot holes I missed and made their homes in the heart of the story. Also I don't know what you mean by 'stock domino' so I'm assuming it's one of those dollar store ripoffs.

(TW: Accidental overdosing on painkillers, mentions of blood, Jason's usual level of swearing, some goons almost dying but like in a funny way.)

Word Count: 2328

Jason wants to scream.

Like, let it rip out on an abandoned cliff in the howling rain kinda scream.

But no, he's stuck babysitting Brucie Wayne who accidentally OD'd on fucking painkillers after trying to treat himself in Alfred's unfortunate absence (how does that even happen?!).

Dick and Damian are out doing some brotherly-bonding thing, Tim's with the Titans, Duke and Cass are at the movies, and Steph has declared herself "not one of Bruce's kids." Leaving Jason as the only one free to look after their "Dad".

Jason pushes Bruce down on the Batcave's gurney for the billionth time after he attempts (keyword: attempts) to walk again, scowling. None of them are getting any waffles from me again. Or pancakes. Or scones. Or anything I make for them out of my sweet, kind heart. Those little shits.

Jason puts two fingers on Bruce’s wrist, checking his pulse. His skin is cold and clammy, breathing slow, but at least he’s not vomiting anymore. He sighs, collapsing on a chair beside Bruce. He's tired. So fucking tired.

Just as Jason's eyes flutter shut for a moment, the Batcomputer's alarm suddenly blares.

Bruce shoots up, shouting, "ALARM!"

Grumbling, Jason drags himself to the computer, pushing Bruce down along the way. He opens the glaring red notification, brows creased.

Black Mask's goons have intercepted some military shipment...

"Ugh..." Jason groans, and moves to put on his helmet (he never changed out of his costume), checking his guns, when a sudden crash from behind him snaps his attention to the man-child he's supposed to be babysitting.

Bruce has stepped off the gurney and collapsed face-down on the med bay's floor.

He can't just leave him there, can he?

Jason considers his options: He could either strap Bruce to the gurney and leave (in which case Dick will have his head), or he could take Bruce out on the streets with him (in which case Dick will absolutely want to murder him.)

Jason smirks. It’s obvious which one’s the right choice.

Ten minutes later, Jason’s riding through the city at over a hundred miles per hour, with Bruce strapped to the backseat of his motorcycle. Bruce is wearing a dollar store ripoff of the Robin domino and a Robin-themed cape made of Tim’s bedsheets, looking absolutely ecstatic at the high speed.

They arrive at the warehouse where Black Mask’s goons have transported their stolen goods, parking in a shadowed spot a building away. Jason gets off, helping Bruce onto his feet, and says, “Now, I’m going to go shoot some people, you stay hidden and quiet, got that?”

“Guns are bad,” Bruce replies, holding a finger to Jason’s helmet. “Just like clowns. And ducks.”

Raising an eyebrow, Jason shakes his head. He doesn’t have time for this right now.

Jason quickly scales the nearest building, grappling to the roof of the warehouse. He peeks in through a hatch in the roof to survey the area. There are about a dozen armed goons, none of them looking very bright. There are 4 crates they’re guarding, likely filled with ammo.

Cocking his guns, Jason jumps down through the hatch, landing right in the middle of the warehouse with a ‘thud’ sound. “Surprise,” He grins, raising his guns.

“Aye, that’s Red Hood, ain’t it?” Comes a goon’s terrified voice. The others around him immediately aim their guns at Jason— they’re clearly untrained.

Suddenly there’s another thud behind him. “That’s a bucket, you morons!” Comes a too-familiar, slurred voice. Jason turns around to come face-to-face with Bruce, eyes wide. 

In a fight with any real criminals, this distraction would have cost Jason his life. But luckily these adorably clueless goons are just as shocked as him.

Unfortunately the distraction only lasts for a few seconds. Jason immediately jumps into the fight, shooting three goons in the kneecaps and dodging a few bullets. From the corner of his eye, he sees two more goons running out the door, crying. He punches another guy in the face, instantly knocking him out, and is about to turn back to check on Bruce when suddenly something hard collides with his skull.

Jason staggers slightly, trying to regain his balance, when he sees a goon holding a giant stone, wearing a proud grin.

Fuck, his helmet’s probably busted…

Then suddenly Bruce is running towards the goon, hands fisted and veins popping, screaming, “NO ONE HURTS MY SON!”

Then Bruce’s fist collides with the goon’s with a sickening crunch, splattering blood across the floor as the man crumples to the ground. Bruce doesn’t stop there, and continues to beat him up, yelling profanities.

It warms Jason’s cold, (un)dead heart to watch that— to see his Dad fighting for him. It’s like they say, you’re most truthful when you’re drunk— or high. This is how much Bruce loves him.

Then another thought strikes him— Bruce is going to regret being this violent when he sobers up. It’s going to claw at him, tear him up, and he’s going to compartmentalize and end up punishing himself by overworking.

Jason rushes forward, pulling Bruce off of the man. “B— Robin, stop!” He shouted, looking into the man’s domino-covered eyes.

Bruce’s brows furrow. “Robin?”

Jason points to Bruce’s Robin-themed cape and stock domino.

“Ah.” Bruce nods, pulling away. “You okay? Did you see any duck?”

“Duck?” Jason pauses in confusion. But before he can question it farther, he spies the three remaining goons using a ladder to climb up through the roof of the warehouse, trying to escape.

“Stay here. And do not move.” Jason orders Bruce, and runs after them.

He makes his way up the ladder as fast as he can , exiting under the polluted night sky. The goons, the ridiculously stupid goons, are standing around the edge of the roof, trying to figure out how they’re going to get down.

He doesn’t get paid enough to deal with this ridiculous shit.

Actually, scratch that, he doesn’t get paid at all.

“Wow, you guys are pathetic,” Comes Red Hood’s robotic voice, startling the goons, and one of them accidentally topples over the edge, screaming. Jason ensures that the guy’s hanging on tight— he can wait.

He cocks his guns, aiming both at the two standing goons. Both men are trembling with fear, hands up in surrender. “Hood— Mr. Hood, please—” One of them squeaks, but one look from Jason shuts him up.

“Please. Mr. Hood was my father,” Jason quips, his robotic chuckle sounding sinister. 

That’s when he hears another voice behind him (again)— “But I’m your father.”

Jason jumps, whipping around. “How did you— I didn’t even hear you come!”

Bruce just shrugs innocently, waving his bloodstained hands at the terrified goons.

Then Jason hears the distinct sound of a gun being cocked. From the corner of his eye he sees the bolder of the goons, the one that had spoken before, taking aim.

“DUCK!” He yells, falling out of the way.

Instead of dodging, Bruce falls into a defensive stance, looking around frantically. “Where?!”

The bullet barely misses Bruce’s ear as he turns his head.

Jason has had it with sky-high Bruce now. Annoyance rising, he quickly shoots the two goons in the kneecaps, forgetting about the one hanging off the edge, and stalks up to Bruce, glaring.

“What is up with you and ducks?!” He demands, his voice raised.

“Ducks are evil,” Bruce spits, nose wrinkled. “Just like clowns. And bats.”

Jason’s brows raise. “Bats are evil?”

“Yeah, duh, that’s why everyone’s scared of Batman.” Bruce rolls his eyes, his drawl sounding too much like Steph. “Bats are scary.”

“You really took ‘become what you fear’ too literally, huh?” Jason snorts, putting his guns back in their holsters. Then he takes off his helmet, checking the damage— just a slight crack at the back. Not too bad.

“You know, I fell into a hole and into a cave when I was a boy and a dozen bats attacked me. I nearly died.” Bruce continues, gesturing towards the air with his hands. 

“Yeah, right.” Jason shakes his head, chuckling. “Now come on, we gotta get you back.”

That’s when another voice rings out, high-pitched and scared. “Um, Mr. Hood? Please HELP! Please, please, please—”

Jason’s attention snaps to the corner of the roof— ah, right, the goon’s still hanging off the edge, isn’t he?

He grumbles, making his way over, and squats above the man, shaking his head. The man below him looks like he’s pissed himself, face ashen, tears running down his cheeks, muttering, “I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die…” On repeat.

“I’ll pull you up on one condition,” Jason looks down at him, voice low. “Never become a gun for hire again. If I see you fighting on the streets…” He pulls out his gun.

“No, no, I won’t, I swear…” The man whimpers, eyes squeezed shut. Jason sighs, and grabs the man by the collar and hauls him up. He crumples onto the roof, curling into a ball.

“Take out your phone and dial 911, tell them you’ve been naughty,” Jason orders, his gun pointed at the man’s head. (What? A guy needs to have some fun.)

The man whines, and immediately obliges.

“Pathetic,” Jason ties the man up quickly, and makes his way over to Bruce, who was sitting on the floor of the roof, taking apart some random crushed handphone he’s found.

“Get up, old man. GCPD will be here soon. We’re going home.” He pulls Bruce up, ignoring how he longingly stares at the dismantled phone.

The two of them grapple down from the roof, landing safely on the pavement. As they walk towards his bike, Bruce says, “Did you know I ate a phone once?”

Jason stumbles slightly. “What?”

“Tasted nice. Like electricity. Crackle-y.” Bruce hummed, his face straight (as straight as someone dating Superman could be). He isn't kidding.

That, or he's delusional.

“Don't try it. You might turn into a computer or something.” Bruce nodded very seriously.

“Oh god,” Jason snorts. “I'm so glad my helmet’s recording all this. Perfect blackmail material.”

“Black's a very, very pretty color.”

Jason rolls his eyes, revving the motor, making sure Bruce is safely strapped onto the backseat behind him. “You're just emo.”

“What's emo?” Bruce raises an eyebrow, words slightly slurred.

“Y'know, when people wear all that black makeup, skinny jeans, with hair covering their eyes.” Jason explains, putting a spare helmet on Bruce's head. “And listen to, like, My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco. The Emo Trinity.”

“Oh, oh!” Bruce's eyes sparkle. “Dickie used to do that! He went to a My Chemmy concert once, but he didn't want me coming along.” He pouts.

Jason thinks of all the times Gerard Way has shoved a mic down his throat and grabbed his junk. “Yeah, I wonder why.”

Then he turns around to look Bruce in the eye. “But, Golden Boy was emo? Seriously?”

Bruce just smiles and nods, saying, “Now go.”

“Going,” Jason smirks and speeds down the streets of Gotham city, not slowing down until their surroundings change from shitty apartment buildings and broken street lights to the eerie quiet of Bristol. He can see the Manor in the distance when he takes a hidden turn, straight down the road that leads to the Batcave. 

He pulls into the underground ‘garage’ section of the Cave, parking his bike before helping Bruce off. As he removes Bruce’s ripoff domino and “cape”, he says sternly, “Now, you tell no one of what we did today, got that? Not a soul.”

Bruce just flashes a thumbs-up and smiles in the most un-Bruce-like way possible. It’s a little creepy, honestly.

“And even if you remember this once you sober up you won’t talk, because you swore on your soul not to tell.”

“Mhm. Kay.”

“Good.” Jason smiles slightly, helping Bruce back to the gurney, making him lie down. He checks him over for any symptoms that the painkiller overdose is making his health worse. His skin’s still cold and clammy, but his breathing’s more steady. His pupils aren’t as small anymore, and he’s way more responsive than he was an hour ago.

Huh. Maybe all he really needed was some exercise.

Jason sits down beside his father, taking a deep breath. “Hey, uh… Did you really mean that, back there? That… That I’m your son?”

Bruce’s brows furrow. “Yes, who else’s son would you be? Superman’s?”

A short laugh escapes Jason. He moves closer to Bruce, lying down so his head is resting beside the older man’s. “I just…” He sighs, unable to form the right words. “I know it doesn’t always seem like it, but… I love you, Dad.”

“Aww, Jaybird…” Bruce’s hand moves sluggishly to cradle Jason. “I love you so much more than you could ever imagine.”

A small smile plays on Jason’s lips as he closes his eyes, leaning into his Dad’s touch. Maybe… maybe babysitting a high Bruce isn’t so bad.

[BONUS!!!]

Dick walks into the infirmary nearly an hour later with Damian trailing behind him, intending to check up on Bruce. He’s been ringing Jason’s phone for a while now, but he hasn’t been picking up. And… Honestly, Dick’s getting worried.

“Tt. I knew we shouldn’t have left Father’s safety in the hands of an incompetent fool such as Todd,” Damian frowns, scowling.

“No, no, it’s probably just a misunderstanding,” Dick tries to reassure his baby brother, but he picks up his pace. “I mean, we both know what Jason’s like. One moment he’s nice, one moment he’s—”

His voice trails off as he sees Jason sitting on a chair beside Bruce, who’s on the gurney— both asleep, with Jason’s head resting on Bruce’s shoulder, and Bruce cradling him.

“Aww, Little Wing…” Dick smiles, pausing. Even Damian freezes behind him. Dick steers him away, back into the main house, so as to not disturb the sleeping pair. “Yeah, they’re okay. Nothing bad happened.”

[denileisariver]

pairing: batman aka bruce wayne x f!reader

summary: you move into wayne manor, but not everything is as it seems.

warnings: dark!bruce, established relationships, male and female masturbation, descriptions of male and female genitalia, voyeurism, another age gap fic cuz i love dilf!bruce, reader is described as a vigilante and being dicks friend, some non-consensual touching kinda, no piv unfortunately :(, reader is also described as having hair long enough to pull, one tiny use of the word 'baby', size kink if you squint, some overall darkish batfam? not rlly but I'll tag them as yandere anyway.

a/n: tbh i jus pulled this outta nowhere and have no idea where this might lead but fuck it we ball.

you had no idea what you'd gotten yourself into.

your new life at wayne manor was fast-paced and quite absurd. the transition from living in a cramped dorm with one girl to an ancient mansion with a bunch of other heroes whose lives you could barely keep up with hit you like a ton of bricks, it gave you whiplash.

you'd been friends with dick grayson ever since the two of you were teenagers. he was always someone you could easily bond with. whether it was about school, relationships, or being a vigilante the majority of the short time the both of you had been on this earth, he was always there for you. he was your best friend.

you never really had anyone you would consider family. orphaned at such a young age, you grew up to be cautious of other people, always wary that they would abandon you or find ways to exploit you.

at the beginning of your friendship with dick, you had honestly been quite jealous of the older male. you knew it was a bit selfish, but you couldn't help it. there was always a small part of you that despised him for being taken in by a wealthy man who could support him at his every whim, his newfound family that seemed to only grow bigger and bigger each time you saw him. how despite all the terrible things he had been through, he managed to find happiness, or at least content in his life.

and you wanted that, too.

but you always buried those feelings deep down. it wasn't his fault, and you couldn't blame him for it either, so you pretended it was never there in the first place. instead, you put on a brave face. it wasn't too difficult, and for some short moments, you did truly believe that you were happy, regardless of how out of place you felt sometimes around dick and his brothers and sisters.

brothers and sisters. those words were so foreign to you, that when you looked over the relationships you had with dick and his family, you almost had a sort of epiphany. none of them were blood related at all, but they went through thick and thin together no matter what. and a small part of you hoped, wished, that maybe you could be apart of that too.

maybe it was all just irrational.

dick and you had spent a lot of time together. at school, at the justice league headquarters, fighting side by side at unholy hours of the night, or just casual hangouts. you knew him well enough to catch that subtle look in his eyes whenever he looked at you. pity. it was there whenever he brought up what parties bruce was throwing for one of the kids' birthdays, or how tim and jason got into another petty fight that he had to resolve, damian getting awards at school that the family had to attend.

all experiences and problems that you never had, and probably never would. at least, that's what you thought, up until now.

"why don't you come stay wayne manor?"

at first, the question caught you off guard. sure, you spent countless of sleepovers at the place, and you'd known a decent amount about it to get around by yourself with ease, but still. you never considered the possibility of actually staying there. and by the look on dick's face, he seems to notice that too. "i meant- if you want. i just know how lonely it can be for you sometimes, and it would just be easier for us, y'know with our nighttime activities and-"

your eyes roll at his quick rambling, internally cringing a bit at the prospect of him mentioning you being fucking lonely. you flash him a weak smile, your tone dripping with sarcasm.

"sheesh, dick, thanks." you don't mean to sound so harsh, but it's difficult when all of this is so personal to you.

"i didn't mean it like that. and it's no big deal, really. we have plenty of space, and im sure bruce won't mind. maybe alfred, since he has to pick up after your ass but-" dick continues, shrugging it off like it really didn't mean anything. like he wasn't asking you to pack up your shit and move in with him and his family. "you're always welcome there."

and at that, your heart softens a bit. of course, you knew that, but even when you stayed over for a weekend or two, you never wanted to feel like you were overstaying. "i'll think about it, dick."

and you did. you thought about it quite a lot actually, even before dick had asked you that ludicrous question. and he was right. it would make things easier. you'd have a stable roof over your head, instead of the cracked ones that leaked like your dormatory back in gotham. you'd be able to spend more time with the people you cared about. you'd have people that cared about you too, look after you, and defend you if needed. it couldn't be that bad, right?

that's how you ended up here.

in a room that was bigger than all the shitty squats you lived since you were a kid combined. there was so much space you didn't know what to do with it. but the rowdiness of the boys and girls outside your door brought a smile to your face. life at wayne manor would call for some serious adjustment, but you felt like you could power through it. plus, it was only a bonus that you'd always thought jason was cute, much to dick's disgust.

the first couple of weeks staying here were honestly going great, much to your surprise. the family had welcomed you with open arms, some of them not even batting an eye when you regularly attended dinner with them, or walked around in your pajamas, or were quick to be in the cave once it was time for patrol. like you were supposed to be there all along.

your friendship with dick was more of the same, only now you lived with him. jason and you had gotten closer, but you didn't trust calling whatever feelings you had for him enough to call it a crush. you didn't always understand whatever nerd stuff tim would ramble about, but you listened to him anways. you appreciated how much stephanie and cass involved you into their movie nights and gossiping. well more you and stephanie gossiping than cass, but it still felt like you had the girl best friends you had always craved for. damian took some time to warm up to you, but you could still bond with him over his art and love for animals. alfred loved you already, so there wasn't much there to add. and then there was bruce.

you couldn't quite place your finger on bruce. even when you were younger, his stoicism and broodiness was something you couldn't get past, only in rare moments. there was always something about him that you found off-putting. granted that he was always kind, if that's even the right word for it, he never made you feel unwelcome, but you always felt uneasy around the man.

maybe it was how he seemed to be able to read you like an open book, how he could disappear in a room full of people, how he never quite matched the energy in the room, his incessant staring. god, you hated how much he stared at you. bruce's gaze made you feel small, when you usually were confident and assured of yourself. you could feel his eyes burning into you across the room, and you didn't know how to say anything about it or do much for that matter besides distract yourself.

you thought that by now you'd be able to get over whatever it was about him, that you'd known bruce long enough that you could just play it off as him being strange in his own way, but those feelings had only intensified ever since you moved into the mansion.

chills would run down your spine whenever he'd place a heavy hand on your waist, seemingly as casual touch, but it always lingered too long. held on too tight. this look in his eyes, but you couldn't tell what it was. you had brought it up briefly to dick, but he didn't think much of it, laughing it off, saying something along the lines that's just bruce, you'll get used to it.

but you didn't. you couldn't.

especially now that bruce was inviting you to spar with him. to make sure you're prepared, he said. prepared for what exactly, you're not so sure. but you reluctantly agreed, trying to see it as something useful and educational that you could actually use while fighting against whatever villain of the day thought about creating mayhem in gotham.

bruce was strong and brutish compared to you. every time you tried to throw your best at him, he always managed to get the upper hand, and you'd be flat on the sparring mat in a matter of seconds. it had almost seemed like childsplay to him, and if you didn't know any better, you'd think that maybe deep down a part of him enjoyed it.

he'd roughly grab and contort your body in uncomfortable positions, to test your flexibility, as he so called it. your hair would be pulled unforgivingly, and he'd place his weight on top of you, telling you to try and escape from him, much to your avail. you felt like he was taunting you, "you think those criminals in gotham are gonna be easy on you like i am?"

it didn't fucking feel like he was going easy. bruce would place his hand on your neck and choke you out till you were clawing at his skin, only letting go if you tried to beg or actually managed to use your own skill to get him to stop, but that had only happened once and never again. and when you writhed and struggled in his bruising hold, you'd notice that damn look in his eyes again.

no, this wasn't normal sparring.

you'd seen him spar with the other boys and girls, and it had never been like this. and although he was still ruthless, he'd given them actual advice. advice that you'd seen them use out in the field on multiple occasions.

you'd been wandering around gotham long enough to know when someone had it out for you. whether it was sex, crime, or something else, you knew that distinct look in a persons eyes.

a predator hunting down prey.

☆☆☆☆☆

you tried to wash off whatever the hell that was with bruce down the drain. everytime the eery thought of him having less than good intentions for you came up, you pushed it away. whether it was out of guilt for even thinking of him in that way, cause he saved so many people each night without expecting anything in return, or because he was your best friends father, and no he'd never hurt you. that's just unreasonable.

the whole situation just made your head hurt. maybe it's just an overreaction. dick said that whatever this behavior was is normal of bruce. and so you foolishly continue to believe it.

you search your drawers for a fresh pair of panties, too tired to realize that some of your favorite pairs had gone missing. the room, which you personalized after your couple of weeks here, feels suddenly strange to sleep by yourself in.

when you first moved in, you slept like a baby. you felt safe, like this was a normal thing because you'd slept well in these walls ever since your sleepovers with dick. now, it just felt like something was watching you. a feeling that sometimes left goosebumps on your skin, and you couldn't understand what it was.

there's bruises on your skin from how tightly bruce held onto you. some as big as the shape of his hands on your wrists, and as small as the tips of his fingers on your neck. you're completely oblivious to the camera that's watching you closely, placed strategically so you'd never find it. you're oblivious to the man whose behind them.

even if you had just taken a shower, you decide to get yourself dirty again, in other ways. your favorite thing to relieve stress. playtime. so you trace your fingertips down your body with a feather-light touch, gently tweaking and rolling your fingers between your nipples to get yourself excited. you allow your mind to go blank for a while.

you have no idea that bruce's breathing only gets heavier when he realizes what you're about to do. don't know how his cock is hardening beneath his joggers when you push your panties to the side, gathering up your slick and finding your clit to pleasure yourself. don't know that he's stroking himself too, between the layers of his pants and boxers, with your panties in his hand.

how he wishes there was better light in the darkness of your room, so he could get a better look at your glistening pussy, and swearing to himself that he'll get a good look at it upclose one day. he matches your pace, making sure he only gets to cum at the same time you do.

you seem frustrated. he thinks that maybe he can fix that for you. you lick at your middle and index finger, using your own saliva as lubricant, teasing yourself by slowly rubbing along your wet folds. torturing him. the soft pads of your fingers find your clit, setting a medium-slow pace. and bruce tries his best to mimick your actions. pulling himself out of the constraints of his clothes, teasing the fat mushroom head of his cock, gliding a thumb over the tiny slit where his pre-cum dripped out of him, then moving it down his shaft to gently pump it with his hand.

and when your fingers pick up the pace, so do his hands. his eyes intently watch the screen before him, admiring the way your body arches up off the bed, head pushing into the pillows. your chest heaves a bit, and by the way you're biting on your bottom lip, he can tell you're struggling to be quiet. he doesn't want you be, but he'll take what he can get, for now.

your hips writhe a bit, almost like you wanted to fuck back at your fingers, desperately needing something thicker than your petite hands. you move both hands down to your cunt, so you can play with your clit and finger fuck yourself at the same time, and the action makes your pussy cry at the attention.

bruces muscles flex with each jerk of his hand, his free hand going down to gently cup his balls. his eyes hone in on your tiny digits, moving in and out of your cunt with one sole purpose, your juices creating a filthy sound that's like heaven to bruce's ears. he wants to be there so he could get a taste of that sweet pussy, but he suffices with your panties in his mouth, biting down on the fabric.

he could see the markings he left on your delicate skin in the moonlight that peeks into your room, possessiveness coursing through him. he feels pathetic for even doing this, but he can't help himself. bruce's cock twitches in his hand at the sight, knowing your orgasm was coming quickly by how sloppy and rushed your movements were becoming.

it's been so long since you've touched yourself. too long in fact, that your cunt spasms and gushes, completely soaking your hands and the sheets beneath you in the process. and bruce allows himself to cum too, his cock jumping a bit with every rope of the sticky substance, covering his happy trail and abs.

you seem too tired to care that you're laying in your own pussy juice, darkening the fabric below. bruce's eyes are soft, watching you roll over on your side, not even bothering to clean up afterwards. that was a tomorrow's problem.

bruce makes sure to save the precious evidence that the camera caught, knowing it'll be hidden away for his eyes only. he watches you fall asleep in your own mess till his cock begins to soften, placing himself back into his boxers.

he knows you pretty well, he'd like to think. knows you well enough that if you knew what he'd just done, you'd probably slap him across the face. another part of him hopes it turns you on just as much as it turns him on, but maybe that's just him feeding into his delusion. he trails his eyes over your sleeping form just one more time, a small goodnight baby whispered from his lips, even if you can't hear him.

he shuts off the computer for the night, hoping that he'll soon be lucky enough to watch you touch yourself again tomorrow. or maybe even get to fuck you. soon. really fucking soon.

he'll have to remind himself to be a bit grateful for dick inviting you to stay here, in his home. bruce hadn't been too proud when he suggested it to dick, bringing up that you'd easily accept to their request of moving into wayne manor. and he was right.

if dick or anyone else was suspicious about what bruce was doing, or planned on doing, he wasn't too worried of it. he also knew his adopted children well enough that they wouldn't tell on him, and loved you too much to allow you to leave, and for that, he was also grateful.

he had you right where he wanted you, and he'd give you a really hard time if you even thought about leaving now.

[flamingpudding]

Part 4 of Ghost Kid in Gotham

<<1 Previous Next

How to catch a baby brother

Richard 'Dick' Greyson had a problem. It wasn't a nuclear level of problem but it also wasn't a paper cut level of problem either. Because apparently he had a baby brother no one in their family but Damien knew about. Granted Damien had confessed that said baby brother was dead and had supposedly died eight years ago.

The explanation that Talia had apparently pulled another Jason was not helpful at all. According to Damien, in response to Tims findings, there was no other way for the twin to be alive other than Talia having preserved his body and then decided after eight years to drop it into the pits. Well lets just say his opinion on that woman if it was already down in the depth it certainly was now.

Which, considering the glowing Lazarus green eyes, could mean that there was now an eight years old child running loose in the Bat Cave with Pit Madness. Not just a simple feral eight years old that looked like perfect B adoption material and so happened to be blood related.

"Guys we need a plan. We can't just let our little teethling run loose."

"Richard, do not refer to my brother as little teethling." Dick only grinned. "Well the little biter needs a nickname and until I find something else fitting its teethling. Or do you have a better suggestion?"

Sweet little Baby Bird was now glowering at him. Oh protective were we, his little brothers definitely were the cutest. He was definitely going to tease sweet little Dami about this later once the first phase of new little brother crisis was over. For now they had to find the little guy first. The Cave wasn't exactly childproof.

"Let's use Jason as bait." Tim suddenly suggested causing the second oldest to grimace. "The little guy apparently likes biting him. We could use that as an advantage."

"Absolutely fucking not." Little Wing disagreed and Dick chuckled in good humor.

"Aw come on Little Wing, this is your chance to make a bond with our new baby before any of us can."

"For once I agree with Todd. Absolutely not, who knows where he has been. I will not have my brother become sick from biting him." He would have cooed at this, if Jason's face change from surprise at the agreement to a purely offended scowl wasn't so funny.

"Okay no biting bait. But we gotta draw out the little guy and calm his Pit Rage." If that feralness the kid displayed had even anything to do with Pit Rage.Considering the glowing eyes though he would think so. Dick eyed Jasons for a moment, he didn't seem to be affected at all nor had he said anything about the Pit being upset or feeling anything strange. So maybe the little guy wasn't suffering to an extrem from it? But he had apparently been brought back by a Lazarus Pit, so the likelihood with their experiences so far was slim.

"Well we gotta find a way to secure the little guy before B comes back or Alfie finds out." Jason mentioned still scowling at Damien. "By the way, I want to be here when you guys tell B about this. I wanna see his face and make fucking sure the little biter won't be turned into another kid soldier."

"Jason." He scowled, this was definitely not the right time for that sort of discussion but he had a point, they needed to find little… what had Damien said his name was? Wait did Damien even tell them the little guy's name? They all had just been using nicknames so far.

"Dami, what's the little teethling's name again?"

"I haven't told you yet." Ah okay so he didn't have a hole in his memory. "It's Danyal, but when we were younger he didn't like the way grandfather and our teachers called his name and insisted on being called informally as Danny."

"Okay right, so we better find little Danny and get everyone together to introduce-"

"Might I ask who this 'little Danny' is, Master Dick?"

He did not scream. But his heart rate shot up with Alfred just appearing behind him like that. Really sometimes Alfred could be as bad as Cass in the ways of sneaking up on people without them knowing.

"Alfred, hey hi what are you doing down here?" He was not nervous, no he wasn't. The way the butler narrowed his eyes at him did definitely not scare him at all, nope.

"I was informed that all of you returned uninjured." Though his eyes narrowed at Jason's hand that got cut earlier and his brother instantly tried to hide it behind his back when he noticed Alfreds eyes on him. "But the four of you, despite having returned to the Cave, have not come up yet. So I was merely checking on you, to make sure nothing was wrong after all."

He gulped. Really there was no way of ever hiding anything from Alfred.

"Jason brought a child to the Cave that we found out is Damien's twin that had died eight years ago but was brought back to life and is now feral and hiding somewhere in the cave."

At least it was Timber that blurred out everything they knew so far.

"His name is Danyal." Baby Bird added and the four of them waited for Alfred's reaction.

"I see. I will go prepare one of the rooms then and inform Master Bruce to return sooner from his meeting with the Justice League then. As well as prepare for a family dinner as soon as possible, I assume. Will my help be needed in finding young Master Danyal?"

"No worries Alfie, I think I have an idea on how to draw out the little shiiii-biter. You made cookies, right?" Jason at the last minute corrected his words because of the look and Dick couldn't help but snicker.

"I indeed did. If my help is not required then I will be on my way."

Giving them all one last look over, the Butler smiled before he turned to leave. Dick, Tim and Jason let out a sigh in relief once Alfred had left again to which Damien only eyed them strangely.

A little while later Jason went to get the cookies and came back with the plate and staring at a green post-it note. "Since when does Alfie stick green post-it notes with cryptic shit on plates?"

"What?" His brother only shrugged offering the note to him. Tim was looking over his shoulder at it and the two stared at the strange writing.

"I think Cass or Steph might be pulling a prank on us? These look just like random squiggles."

"Let's leave this for later and look for the little teethling." He passed the note to Tim, noticing the curiosity in his eyes. Oh boy, he probably should make sure his little brother gets some sleep instead of trying to encrypt whatever was written on that little note all night.

"Now everyone lets take a cookie, resist eating it and go hunt down our little teethling."

Damien narrowed his eyes on him. "I told you to stop calling Danyal that." The little baby bird still took a cookie though and marched away into the bat cave. They had separated wandering through the Bat Cave trying to cover as much ground as possible and by this point Dick was ready to call for Cass to join them, maybe even wake up Duke just so they would finally find the little kid.

That was until a familiar yowl of pain resounded in the Cave. The direction made Dicks stomach sink once he remembered just what was in the Cave in this direction. "Jason!"

Once he arrived there he feared for the worst. Jason avoided the area, because B had placed their Lazarus Pit there and his brother had often said that it was one of the reasons he didn't like coming to the Cave that much anymore let alone into this area of the Cave. To hear his brothers shout of pain from that area couldn't mean anything good.

Well that was until he got to the scene. Dick didn't know how long he stood there frozen but at some point he knew he took out his phone to take some photos of what was happening. Tim was already laughing and Dick was pretty sure that Babs was most likely recording this with one of the many cameras B had in the Cave.

Jason lay with his back on the ground, with one hand his brother was still holding the cookie waving it desperately before Danny's face who was biting down on the other arm sitting on the downed vigilante's chest. Little hands gripping onto the arm in an attempt to make sure no one was taking his chewtoy away from him. Meanwhile Damien was trying to lift the little biter off Jason by holding him with his hands under the kids armpits.

"You little shit! FUCK! Come on, here is the cookie! Take the fucking cookie! OUCH FUCKING HELL! How is he resisting Alfies cookies!"

"Danyal, No! You do not know where Todd was or how dirty he is. Let go of his arm this instant. We do not want you to get sick!"

"Hey!"

This was gold, Dick decided, and would go straight to the black mail as well as family memories folder.

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

There's no "I" in Team but there are two in Migraine

Bruce had no issue with teamwork, despite what his children and colleagues might think. Teamwork was great. If done properly it was efficient, and it was good to have backup. Competent backup, at least. 

Bruce helped found the Justice League. Obviously he was a supporter of teamwork. 

However. 

Some teams he really could have happily lived out his life without them ever existing. 

He had a list. 

One: Dick and Clark Kent

Clark had been the first hero he had introduced Dick to. It was a move he had regretted ever since. 

He was glad the two of them got along, of course, but did they have to get along so well? 

He could withstand torture but the two sets of sad puppy eyes attacking at the same time was on another level altogether. 

Two: The Titans

Pros: Dick was making friends. 

Cons: Dick was either away with his friends, or they came home with him. Really, all Bruce wanted was to spend one week without putting out any fires caused by teenage superheroes. Literal fires, not metaphorical ones. Well, actually there were plenty of those kind too. 

Three: Dick and Jason

When Bruce first brought Jason home he wasn’t sure how Dick was going to react. And so maybe he panicked slightly and didn’t end up telling him for three weeks. In his defense, the voicemail he had left asking Dick to call him soon was left before the newspaper article came out. 

Perhaps not his best moment. 

Eventually, though, the two boys were introduced. 

There was some yelling that took place, mostly directed at him, but other than that things seemed to go rather smoothly. Assuming, that is, that smoothly meant neither of them seemed to care about getting to know the other one, and mostly kept to themselves and their own activities. 

And then, four months, two weeks, and five days after Jason first came to the manor, Bruce came home to discover the two of them had bonded over some unspoken activity that neither were willing to divulge. Alfred knew and didn’t disapprove so it couldn’t be that bad, but from then on out it was…well…

Bruce began the daily habit of checking his blood pressure. 

Four: Talia al Ghul and Lois Lane

Bruce didn’t know how the two of them had met and he didn’t want to. See, Dick, he was okay with not knowing things. Sometimes. In this one instance, at least. 

Five: Dick and Slade Wilson

Worst three weeks of his life. 

Six: Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn

He was happy for them, he really was. He just wished they could be happy together somewhere less structurally damaging. 

Seven: Jason and Harley Quinn

Explosion therapy was not a thing, despite both their arguments otherwise. They didn’t even give him a Joker effigy to blow up. They could have at least asked. He would have happily paid for that one and all the rest of them. 

Eight: Tim and Barbara

 He wasn’t that old. He knew how to use his computer. 

Nine: Jason and Cassandra

Too competent. They should never have been allowed on the same team for any game ever. If he heard one more complaint from any of his other children he was going to seriously lose it. 

And then there was that one time the two of them disappeared for a week and no one, not even himself or Clark, could find them. They had turned back up with grins and minimal injuries, and Bruce had tried to not investigate, he really had. But he needed to know, regardless of how much he regretted it later. (A lot. He regretted it a lot.) 

Ten: Dick, Jason, and Constantine

Bruce hated magic. 

Eleven: Jason, Diana, and Barry Allen

No one knew how or why the three of them had teamed up. It had been four months of secret meetings and pointed looks and minor heists that couldn’t technically be traced back to them but Bruce knew. And then there was the regular day-to-day hero-ing. Diana, he could understand. That’s what she did. Jason? Had always been vocally opposed to getting too involved with the Justice League, but had also always looked up to Diana, so maybe that was understandable? Allen? The man was retired. And he wasn’t suddenly out of retirement for some reason, no. He was just there to “lend a hand” to the other two. 

At least Bruce could comfort himself in knowing Jason was spending time with two respectable individuals. It was certainly a step up from his unfortunately ongoing acquaintance with Rayner. 

Twelve: Stephanie and Hal Jordan 

They should never have been allowed to meet. It was a disaster. For Bruce. 

Jason had been the one to introduce them, as he had proudly let Bruce know after the first breaking news cycle hit.

Thirteen: Duke and Damian 

Bruce would have told Jason how thankful he was that he was acting as the moderating adult influence with those two if he didn’t think Jason would start doing the opposite out of spite. 

Jason would make a great parent someday. 

Bruce would love a six month vacation. 

Fourteen: Alfred and Martha Kent

He didn’t really need to explain this one, right? Everyone could just move on, continue with their lives and so on and so forth. 

Fifteen: Damian and Batcow

Because a boy needs a cow and a cow needs an emotional support duck, turkey, cat, dog, rabbit, goat, and raccoon. Apparently. Tim and Jason were, in Bruce’s opinion, far too enthusiastic to provide research as evidence whenever needed (or not needed, as was usually the case). 

[unadulteratedsoulsweets]

A DC X DP IDEA #23

A Family Portrait

Imagine dis…

Most of the fanfics and even Tumblr posts are all about the long-lost son of both Bruce Wayne Selina or even Talia, the long-lost brother of either Damian, Tim, Dick, or even Jason. But what if we changed up the timeline?

What if…

…

Damian was just lurking around the manor at a fast pace if the way he looked around, looking for a hiding as Grayson had proposed the idea of playing a simple yet harmless family activity for the family of vigilantes. Grayson had been chatting all week and persuaded each of the imbeciles he calls brothers to join in. Todd was bribed with a no-ask favor from Grayson while Drake was dragged in the hopes of Richard being silent to Alfred about his intake of caffeine despite Alfred’s warnings. Damain already knew that Alfred the butler knew and was merely waiting for Alfred to hide his stash. While Thomas, Brown, Gordon, and Cain did not need more incentive from Grayson. After a quick shouting match from all sides on which activity will be chosen, all of them have chosen a simple hide-and-seek game within the manor as all of them still feel the repercussions of last week’s chosen game which still brings shivers down the assassin’s back every time, he remembers the things that were done in the name of fun family bonding activity.

The moment Drake began counting down all of them began scrambling out of the theater room and to quickly find a decent hiding spot. All of them were trained by Batman and have flourished under his tillage so finding a spot that nobody knew of is going to be hard. Damian knew that despite Drake having prominent eye bags under his eyes, he could not lower his guard in front of him despite his former attitude toward Drake and slowly mending their relationship Damian has some sort of respect, awe, and fear for Drake as this is the same person who had outwitted his grandfather and lived, the one who had fought his grandfather’s assassins and won but you never heard that from him after all if anyone knew what he thought of Drake, his katana will likely to immediately meet that person’s throat.

He thought of asking Alfred for assistance but he refused, he is already at the disadvantage with both Grayson and Todd living in the manor longer thus having found more than hiding spots for them. He already knew that Cain was already hidden in the shadows but he is the Blood son of the Bat and he refused to be the first one to be found.  But then he remembered a short conversation he had with Grayson when he first arrived at the manor. Grayson explained that the attic holds all antiques as well as family heirlooms that were passed down from each generation. It may be covered in a few dusts as Alfred cleans the attic once every blue moon. Grayson explained that the attic was heavily haunted as when he was just a child, he could hear people talking in hushed tones each time he went near the ladder that leads to the attic. When Damian tried to inquire for more information Grayson successfully changed the subject and was merely forgotten up until he saw the secret entrance to the attic of Wayne Manor.

Looking at the hidden ladder that leads to the attic Damian thinks of his decision on the one hand nobody had the same thought of him hiding in the attic due to Grayson the “ghosts” at the attic but on the other, he was about to enter uncharted territory. After a quick deliberation himself, he had already closed the entrance to the attic. After ensuring that nobody had seen him enter, he immediately took a look around to further hide but he couldn’t help to widen his eyes at his surroundings.

Eccentric pieces of marble statues surrounded him that looked suspiciously just some stone slabs, multiple worn-down artworks that looked like a child’s doodle, and scattered boxes of blurry photography, but some artworks and pieces could worth billions such as artworks and vases as if they are from the ancient greek, a different type clocks and a single grandfather clock that have different cuts and sizes of sapphires, diamonds, and gold, multiple chests that were escaping gold coins as the wood seem to rot, a box made out of fine glass that seems to protect a glass egg that holds every shade of blue there is.

As he kept looking around mesmerized by the unnatural decors and riches around him, he soon came across a portrait. A woman whose clothing seems to come from the early 1900s with a neutral expression. Upon closer inspection, Damian saw a nameplate just below the portrait and it says “Elizabeth Rose Wayne” which concludes that this must be one of his ancestors. As Damian let his eyes roam, he saw more portraits from family portraits to single portraits. All seemed to be falling apart due to time, as Damian went deeper as he kept following in deeper each portrait. Up until the last portrait, A tall middle-aged man with grey hair most in his head with grey eyes sitting in a large red velvet chair wearing what looked like a Victorian suit surrounded by what seemed to be his children. A large young man with black wispy hair that was tied in a ponytail with dark blue eyes looking neutral at the painting beside him a young man in his early teens with a mop of black hair and bright blue eyes with freckles adorning his check-looking bored and lastly a young girl with a generous amount of black hair styled to what looked like a modernized coil down to her chin and with baby blue eyes the cheekiest smile and was sitting impatiently on top of what looked like their father. All of them were wearing different Victorian-style suits and dresses that seemed to complement their eyes despite the different shades of each one.

Below the said family portrait were their portraits with each nameplate embedded just below the said portrait.

From the right which Damian had deduced as the oldest a nameplate below that spelled “DANAL” Next the nameplate spelled “DANIEL” Lastly the only female in the portrait spelled “DANIELLE” Damian looked at each of the nameplates and thought which of their parents named them with almost the same spelling of each name and the same meaning all names share in Hebrew that means “God is my judge.”

Whomever the painter was made Damian impressed as he felt all of the portraits were looking straight at him, judging his very being.

…

Meanwhile, Tim had already found the majority of his siblings. They all huddled up to find Damian as they were quite impressed at where he had hidden.

Looking around they have stumbled upon a semi-open door to the attic and have deduced that Damian had hidden there. As soon all of them laid eyes on what the attic contained all of them had a jaw-drop moment as such treasures and artifacts seemingly being stored away like some old clothes in the attic rather than being guarded in a high-level security vault. Jason began asking Dick why he even spread the story about the attic anyway as they could have seen these things much sooner, Dick kept on spluttering that he did hear voices back then.

Soon enough the more they went deeper into the attic they saw Damian looking over at a family portrait of what looked like the first generation or the pioneer of the Waynes. Dick excitedly yelled at Damian for being the last to be found but at the sudden loud noise, Damian accidentally swiped his hand too fast at the nameplate creating a small wound enough to bleed but not too deep, covering some of Damian’s blood at the nameplate.

Damian turned to face Grayson and the rest but he didn’t take notice of the nameplate spelled “DANIEL” that had some of his blood seem to absorb the said blood.

…

The room suddenly engulfed with bright green light with each batfam member immediately covering their eyes due to the onslaught of light.

The moment they started to blink away the black spots dancing at their eyes they immediately noticed that the supposed family portrait was now missing 3 members leaving the supposed father sitting alone in the “family portrait”.

Dick tried to usher his siblings out while panicking out that his rambling back then and now is correct about this part of the manor being haunted.

As the voices of each of them began to overlap with each other creating a loud noise, a single large yawn silenced all of them.

Turning their heads back to the portraits they all zeroed in on the individual portrait in the middle. Exhaling another yet small yawn as he seems to try to blink away his sleepiness. Soon the other portraits beside and above him seem to follow, “DANAL” seems to yawn roughly exposing his pearly white teeth to the still shell-shocked BatFam. “DANIELLE” seemed to yawn and pout at the same time as if she was interrupted in her midday nap time. Lastly, the older gentleman in the now empty family portrait covered his hands as he yawned quietly.

Slowly but surely conversation between each painting seems to start as if this scene is something nothing out of the ordinary, as each portrait talks to the other without noticing the still shell-shocked BatFam in front of them.

As “DANIELLE” seemed to be bored and turned to look in the other direction she immediately noticed at still siblings and harshly told the rest they had guests with them.

Dick, Barbara, Jason, Cass, Tim, Stephanie, Damian and Duke.  They were all trained under the greatest detective, he taught them and told them repeatedly that they need to have their mind at the present moment, every day, every hour, and every minute. This is their best tool, their Mind. They can´t take away their mind. It lives inside of them and is the best weapon that they need to live. Yet it seems all of their collective minds were still in the middle of processing the result of a harmless hide-and-seek family fun time activity.

…

The quartet Halfa of a family had been in the Ghost Zone for centuries. Danny’s sister Jazz had settled down and had a family, as they have become somewhat immortal, Fright Knights and a Ghost King they still wished for some sort of communication with their remaining mortal family. Came with the creation of a specialized portrait that only they could access for easy communication, like a video call, while the knowledge of their actual summoning instruction summoning them to the mortal plane had been coded and written at the back of the said portrait.

Vlad had the smug smirk when he had convinced Jasmine to let Dan, Danny, and Dani dress in their Sunday’s best, which made them all squirm and uncomfortable, and to pose for who knows how long for the painting just to finish, never mind that he added an extra three for them as some sort of payback for all the time the three gremlins had caused him extra grey hair.

For someone, they told each other they were different, and seemed all think alike causing him grief, stress, and extra white hairs on top of his head.

At first the first up to the third generation of nieces and nephews would call them through the use of the painting but it seems that it had been radio silence for years now. It is either the knowledge of a weird uncle and aunt has not been properly passed on or Jazz’s line has died out.

So, imagine their surprise that after centuries of radio silence, they have felt their descendant calling them through their portraits.

After a quick pleasantry to each other, all of them looked expectantly at the siblings and Danny briefly wondered if he had something in his face for them to look at them like that and if they had forgotten to breathe.

…

 PS: If someone out there wanted to continue or make a fic about this you are free to do so, don’t forget to tag me though.

[too-much-tma-stuff]

I Want Better For You (part 3.5)

part 1 | Masterpost | Part 3

Tim sat on the edge of his bed in Titan’s Tower, his mind going like a hamster on a wheel, a mile a minute and getting nowhere. In his hands he held the note left for him by Red Hood! It was a serious security breach that he had gotten in here at all. Obviously Tim knew he was smart, he had been Robin before Tim after all, you couldn’t do that job without being smart as hell and strong as heck. But he had upgraded the security himself when he joined the team, no one should have been able to get into the tower, let alone into his room to leave the note.

At least it wasn’t a bad note? In fact it was… nice, it was a kind offer. They had to know that if he did this he would spy, he wouldn’t even be able to help it because he’d always had a detective's mind, yet still they offered. 

Of course there was always a possibility that it was a trap of some type but Tim really didn’t think it was. Jason had proved he could get into the Tower, if he wanted Tim dead or kidnapped he could have just done it.

He should talk to his team about this, he should talk to Bruce about this, but for the moment he just held the note. Robin had always been his hero, sure it was Dick he’d first recognized because of the Flying Grayson connection, but Jason had been His Robin. Tim had idolized Jason, and been completely devastated when he died. Ya he had become Robin to help Bruce, but it was to memorialize Jason as well.

He knew that Jason wasn’t the same as he’d been before his death, but… while he was dead Tim had gotten used to thinking of him like a brother. A part of him desperately wanted to take this note at face value, to forget all about the violence, and the crimes, and just take the olive branch and bond with his childhood hero. But he was going to be smart about this.

He was going to go, of course he was, but he needed to put safety measures in place and some sort of plan. Though he probably still wasn’t going to tell B about it, he was overprotective and would grill Tim for any bit of information he managed to gleen, and if he wanted any real info he would have to do a long con. Best he could do right now would be to have Superboy listen in, set up a code word, and have Impulse ready for an extraction if needed then… well he’d tell Batman when he needed to.

------------

It took about a week to talk Superboy into letting him go but it wasn’t exactly hard to set up as minimal of plans as he had, including wearing a hidden wire to record whatever happened. As long as it worked, Tim had heard tech had a habit of messing up around Hyena if he didn’t want them working. 

He didn’t bother thinking of an excuse, he didn’t think he needed one. Wanting to get to know them would be enough, especially if he was going to rely on them for anything in the future. 

So, feeling tense and keeping to the shadows he entered Crime Alley on a slow night with his friends behind him, figuratively speaking. He moved a bit deeper in, grappling up to the roof of a building, feeling a little lost and listless. He did know vaguely where to find these two, but Crime Alley wasn’t a small place, and now that he was in their territory he didn’t know where to go, it’s not like they knew where Hood and Hyena lived, or their base of operations. 

It seemed like he didn’t need to though, because while he was standing on the roof thinking he saw someone coming, leaping from one building to the other with reckless abandon. They weren’t even using a grapple as they free ran and made jumps Tim was pretty sure should have been impossible. Tim knew who it was before they were close enough to see detail because Hood still used a grapple, the only one who acted like that was Hyena.

Sure enough Hood’s lover skidded to a halt across the roof in front of Tim, grinning to the point he could see it a little past the muzzle he wore. He didn’t have any weapons out, not that that meant anything, half the time Hyena forgot to use the clawed brass knuckles he carried and fought with bare hands. Tim was tense, ready to fight or flee but Hyena was not, he seemed relaxed and didn’t approach, keeping his hands visible. 

“Hey there little birdy, what can I do for ya?” Hyena asked, he didn’t have a Gotham accent but it was a little hard to tell where exactly it was from.

“I got Red Hood’s note. I just wanted to talk, introduce myself properly and meet you before I decide to take you up on any of the offers.” Tim said honestly.

“Of course!” Hyena agreed, pulling his phone out of a hidden pocket on the inside of his cropped jacket. “I’ll text Hood, ask him to pick up some food for us and we can have a little rooftop picnic and chat for a bit. How’s that sound?”

“Sounds good,” Tim said, not sure why he was surprised by the offer.

“Any requests? The lifestyle sure builds up an appetite huh? And I certainly hope you’re still growing,” Hyena teased, cackling at Tim’s expression of indignation. Hyena wasn’t that much taller than him!

“Coffee,” He requested, finally relaxing a little.

“Hmm,” Hyena sounded judgmental as he tapped at his phone. “Fine, it’s your bone density that’s at stake not mine.” He pressed send, waited a moment and his phone dinged with a reply. “Great, he’ll be on his way soon, with picking up food he’ll probably be about a half hour,” Hyena said, pocketing his phone again and flopping down, as if the rooftop was a soft bed. “I know it’s probably Hood you really came to see but is there anything I can tell you in the meantime? Let’s stick to small talk though huh? I know how you bats and birds are, but I also know you’re wearing a wire, and I’m not interested in spilling my guts.” 

“Alright, ya that’s fair. Hood mentioned in the note that you know a lot about astronomy?” Tim mentioned, finally sitting down with his legs crossed as well.

“Oh ya, I was totally obsessed with it for most of my life, I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid and learned everything I could about space and engineering,” Hyena confirmed casually.

“This is a long way from being an astronaut,” Tim pointed out.

“Ya, well, things don’t always go the way you plan you know? Sometimes you get kidnapped by mad scientists and experimented on to the point you go a little around the bend,” Hyena snickered. Tim wasn’t sure if he was being serious, or self referential, or not.

“Riiight, well, what are your favourite space facts then?” Tim asked, just to pass the time really. Hyena brightened immediately and was happy to start sharing a bunch of random facts. 

It ended up in a back and forth of fun facts, aerospace vs chemistry and both of them could go shot for shot when it came to engineering. Tim realized, a bit belatedly, that Hyena is way smarter than Tim had given him credit for. That was disconcerting but… if they ended up getting alone Tim thought he could have a lot of fun tinkering with him.

“Incoming,” Hood broke into their conversation, warning them before he landed on the roof so he wouldn’t startle them. “Hey there Timmy,” He said as he walked over to crouch next to Danny, handing him a few bags of batburger and a tray of drinks before taking off his helmet. He was wearing a domino underneath it but it wasn’t like Tim didn’t already know his identity. “Got your coffee, I bet if you took off that domino your eye bags would be nearly as dark as the mask. Never enough time to sleep between school, social life, and nightlife.” Jason said, taking the tray of drinks back from Hyena, who promptly started digging through the bag with his now free hands, and handed the coffee cup to Tim.

“If you drop out of school to play hero I will personally kick your ass,” Jason said pointing at Tim warningly. 

“Uhhh,” Tim sounded, shifting a little awkwardly because he couldn’t deny he had already thought about dropping out. He looked down and took a sip of the coffee, which wasn’t great, but hey. “Why do you care?”

“Neither Hyena or I got to finish school because we died before graduation,” Hood said simply, which was a punch in the gut, and new information about Hyena. “I want better for you.” 

Tim didn’t know how to respond to that.

Hyena finished rummaging through the bag with a little yip of delight and started distributing the food, handing Hood a bag and taking a box of chicken wings, a burger, and some fries for himself before handing off the rest to Tim. “Looks like Hood didn’t know what you wanted and bought half the store, whatever you don’t eat I’ll finish,” Hyena joked as Tim took the bag. “Shit I forgot my sauces,” Hyena grumbled, staring at his nuggets with a little pinch between his brows. 

“What sauce are you looking for?” Tim asked, looking through the bag.

“Sweet and sour,” Hyena said brightly and Tim found the sauce and tossed it to Hyena, who hummed happily and took off his mask to eat. He was completely barefaced now and Tim couldn’t help but stare a little just because of how casual he was being about this. “What?” Hyena asked, catching Tim staring. 

“Hey I know he’s cute but he’s taken,” Hood joked, slinging an arm around Hyena’s shoulders who cackled and leaned back against Jason.

“No!” Tim said, cursing his fair skin for showing his blush, not because Hood was right of course, he was just embarrassed! “I mean, that’s not what I was thinking, I’m just surprised you took off your mask,” He told Hyena.

“It’s not like you haven’t seen it before I’m sure. I’m sure you and the bats have already figured out my ‘civilian identity’ or whatever. It’s not like I have anything to protect really, I only have the mask and the outfit because I like the aesthetic.” Hyena said, gesturing down at himself. 

“Fair enough I guess…” Tim said before looking back at Hood. “How did you get into Titan’s Tower?”

“Trade secrets Timmy, I’d rather talk about you. How’s school? You got a girlfriend or boyfriend?” Jason asked with a shit eating grin as Tim sputtered indignantly and then took a big bite of his burger to avoid having to answer such an invasive question! Especially with Superboy definitely listening in.

[rubydubydoo122]

I think I just figured out where woobified Tim Drake came from.

Any Tim and Jason bonding fic- mainly Tim joins the batfam early fics.

bc, here's the thing. I think these writers know that Jason wouldn't like Tim if he was just a normal rich kid. In fact Jason "I have a massive inferiority complex but refuse to show it" Todd would probably be so jealous of Tim, even if we are talking about his Robin Days because Jason would see it as Tim trying to take Jason's place.

so, what to these writers do to make Jason like Tim more? They make Tim more timid, and dial Tim's neglect to 1000% so that Jason sympathizes with this kid who's no longer recognizable from his original canon counterpart.

If anything, Jason would become brothers with a Snarky Tim faster than a Timid Tim because they'd be spitting insults at each other, and Bruce tries to stop them from fighting and Tim's like "Woah, Mr. Dresses up as A Furry and punches people instead of going to therapy, I don't think you get a say in how we fight with each other."

And that would be the moment Jason knew he had a brother for life. Lmao.

[auroreliis]

Hi not sure if ur requests are open but, can I request a scenario where reader forces the batfam to do their skincare with them? I can’t get rid of the image of them with face masks out of my mind 😭

Platonic Yandere!Batfam

Summary: You force your family to do their skincare routine with you.

CW: no warnings

(not edited or proofread)

Dick:

-He's the easiest to convince. Just tell him he'll look even more stunning and he will be so flattered that he won't even realise what you want from him

-Follows your instructions to the point where you think that he already knows all you're telling him and is just pretending not to know in order to spend time with you

-His skin is naturally smooth, it kind of looks like he already has a skincare routine

-Isn't too fond of the face mask, because he can't talk with it on

-After you teach your big brother how to take care of himself, he stays consistent forever <3

Jason:

-He didn't have anything better to do, so he obliged, although he thought about making fun of you for it

-Was very awkward with it and didn't really like the feeling of all those products on his skin

-"I prefer being natural"

-You told him it would make his rough skin look much nicer and he thought about it for a second, before continuing

-You noticed the difference and complimented him on it

-He was delighted with the results

-You caught him doing his skincare routine a few months later

-He now steals your products

Tim:

-You barely convinced him

-He HATES the greasy feeling on his hands, because now he cannot touch ANYTHING without leaving behind the residue

-Also, now he cannot finish any work

-Has to wash his hands at least 7 times to remove the products

-You probably have to do the skincare routine for him

-He never does it again after that, unless you do it for him when he has time

Damian:

-It wasn't difficult to get him to do it

-Sprinkle in a few mentions of how smooth skin improves one's combat because of the wind resistance and he will do it without needing to be forced

-He is very consistent and actually does it properly

-Praise him on how his skin looks and he will be over the moon

-You probably do your skincare routine together

-Very cute bonding moment

-I recommend 10/10

BONUS:

Bruce:

-Don't tell anyone, but he already has a skincare routine

-He needs to look perfect as the CEO of Wayne Enterprises and wearing that cowl every night isn't doing him any favours

-If you decide to keep it to yourself, he will definitely share tips and might even do his skincare routine with you

-If you're behaving really well, he might even make custom products just for you <3

-Also a cute bonding moment

-10/10

[celaenaeiln]

Do you have any fic recs where dicks relationship with the batfam is the focus?

Yes! These are all fics I've adored

FAVORITE!! I place this fic on a pedestal. It's one of the best fics of all time - The primacy of personal conscience

Favorite! Another one of my all time favorites. Dick, Jason, Tim are deaged to their robin eras and Damian and Bruce are in their current ages - Just, How

Dick gets split into three personalities - The choice to be seen

FAVORITE!! - Dick's buried. But like hell is the batfamily going to let it stay that way - The unnecessary requiem

ALL of CamsthiSky's fics focus of Dick's batfam relations and are good reads - Link

Small moments with Dick and the family - Snippets

Dick, Damian, and Tim. Absent parent Bruce and needy Bruce are the same person as always- prodigal

Favorite! Dick and Damian's relationship and evolution - Snapshots

Sad fic if Dick's reaction after Ric was darker - Strength in a Lack of Continuity

Batfamily's reaction to Dick's sexual objectification - I can't hear you, I don't fear you now

Good fic about something I don't remember (sorry! It's been years but I saved it so it must be good) with young justice and batfamily reactions that were accurate - End Days

If Bruce was a lot darker and acted on his overprotective tendencies collection. It's centered around Dick - Darkish Batfamily

How the batfamily reacts to Dick getting shot in the head - Fallen

Dick buys a bunch of plants and bonds with all of them - let your love grow tall

All of Danishsweethearts works are good - Danishsweethearts

Sad fic about Dick being batman again and batfamily's reaction. I think Tim would react differently. Maybe. But it's a fantastic angst fic - My life's going by but it's just begun

Dick, Damian, and Dick's massive group of friend and allies - Missed a spot

Dick's a civilian but he's still their big brother - Those times that Dick Grayson got tangled up with the batfamily

Dick, Peter Parker, Cat Noir, Danny Fenton and their fathers. PS they're all socialite friends. This has to be canon - The Black Tux Gang

Angst story about Dick if he had mental illness. No happy ending - Shattered Tea Cups

Dick is a changed man after spyral and batfamily's reaction - Downward spyral

Someone planning a hit on Nightwing? Not if Nightwing does it on himself first (fun) - Money for daffodils

Favorite! Dick has retrograde amnesia and Bruce struggles to cope - Harbor

Dick died seven years ago. And then woke up - Faith and fate

Dick's secret abilities the batfamily doesn't notice - Unusual skills and habits

The truth of Dick's death and everyone's reaction - Code B

Favorite! Dick is Talon, Tim is Red Hood, and Jason is Red Robin - A New Adversary

Favorite! Jason and Dick are close. Told through the eyes of everyone else - proximity

Soft fic. ABO but Dick acting as Tim and Damian's mother - Your truth is a deception meant to poison me

Dick's gone but the rape of him is not. The batfamily will avenge their brother. The whole world will - Take the night back

ABO robin reversal collection - Robin Reversal ABO

Werewolf au where Dick meets Jason and Bruce comes along - Den and Pack

If Dick got deaged to renegade era - Pause in the Pendulum

Sweet fic about the Batbros seeking comfort in Dick - Haven

Favorite! Duke time! The Batfamily teasing Dick lovingly - Shenanigans

Dark batfam fic around Dick - Gaslight Manor

Dick will do anything to protect his family (Has Constantine/Dick) - Time (to protect you)

If Dick was Terry McGinnis' biological father - Beyond the Night Collection

Talon!Dick in the Teen Titans universe with batfamily - Just a dead kid

Angst, sad fic about Dick getting tired of being the mediator - Please just get along (I can't do this anymore)

One of my all time favorites - Everyday one headcanon about Nightwing

Batfamily mourning the loss of Dick's hair - He's shorn, we're torn

Jason tries stealing in Bludhaven rather than Gotham. He meets Nightwing instead of Batman and his life gets a whole lot better - Hot wheels

Stephanie time travels and meets Robin Dick! - Oops

Favorite! ALL of iloveyourwords' fics - iloveyourwords

Favorite! ALL of ScarlettSwordMoon's works - ScarlettSwordMoon

Angst fic. So much angst. Sometimes Jason's anger gets the worst of him but it's not because he doesn't care - not even rain has such small hands

Favorite! The heroes are forced to forget Dick. And they regret (has constantine/dick/zatanna) - Love that burned green against skin

Favorite! ALL of Kuroaki's works - Kuroaki

Dick, Tim, and Jason watch Encanto and, well, Surface Pressure was made for Dick - Who am I if I don't have what it takes

Pre-robin Dick. Dick's only fault is his over-competence - lightning is the shine (but I've been working on the thunder)

Favorite! Dick's name comes out of the Hogwart's cup. This changes everything and nothing - heavy is the crown

The batkids are unhinged. Poor jason - The AU noone asked for

Dick falls. And so does everyone else (iloveyourwords' fic) - icarus

FAVORITE!! Dick, Jason, Damian undercover on a cruise. Everything goes wrong - Like those foreign stars

YJ where Dick joins Deathstroke and Bruce breaks inside - Fallen son

Favorite! ALL of miss_aphelion's works - miss_aphelion

Here's a starter for miss_aphelion's works - Dick of Troy

Dick and Bruce in the eyes of the JL - Boy on the couch

Favorite! Dick is stuck in his dreamworld and his family just want him back - Happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow

Hunger Games Au! Dick volunteers as a tribute - To get a dream of life again

Dick and Bruce and Dick's graceful manipulation of people - Some men fall from grace. Some are pushed

Dick takes time away from Bruce and finds himself again - Local oldest child takes time away from family

FAVORITE!! One of ScarlettSwordMoon's works - shipping rivalries

FAVORITE!! Dick reveals his trauma through singing - A robin's song

FAVORITE!! Dick's personality gets split in three - Three is a party

Dick runs away to Bludhaven but the batfamily won't let things rest - What stalks in my shadows

FAVORITE!! The batfamily is stuck in a timeloop where they can't save Dick - One thousand, Three hundred, and Nine Hours

Tim being a cute menace and feral Dick - little menace

FAVORITE!! Damian has a few choice words to say about Bruce's treatment of Dick - The threat

Slade saves Dick from the Court of Owls and Rose's view of him - Quiet now, you're going to wake the beast

FAVORITE!! Bruce is gone and Dick is seeing ghosts. The batfamily just wants to protect him - The haunting of Wayne house

FAVORITE!! Deaged Dick and Damian collection - you've always loved the strange birds

Dick's been deaged wakes up in a world with 5 robins no thanks to Slade - persephone's in hell

FAVORITE!! The batfamily's in a time loop trying to save Dick - rewind, remix, retry, redo

Funny fics I'm in love with!

Hilarious and all-around fun - Batbros Wreck Havoc

Favorite! ALL of pupeez4eva's fics but here's a starter for fun - That Torturous Thing Known as Time Travel

More fun fic (can you tell I like the humorous ones?) - A Bunch of Ridiculousness

Don't mess with Dick from Jason's perspective. Jason, Dick, and Bruce - Dig Down Deep

Accurate fic about batfamily's reaction to Dick dating Joey - Families Ever Changing

AU: Justice League meeting Nightwing focusing on Dick, Bruce, and Barry - Starry eyed

(Sorry had to slip another one in) JL's reaction to Dick - Your call may be interrupted

The batfamily will not let anyone take cover pictures of Dick - The annual Bludhaven firefighter's calander for charity

Another JLA story. Dick was a wild child nightmare robin - Adventures in batsitting

[mysterycitrus]

the way you write the relationships the batfam have with each other is so delicious to me like AUGHH YOUR BRAIN!!! it’s so good. if you were willing, i'd love to hear more of your thoughts on the relationship cass and jason have / steph and jason (staring at you with my big wet eyes)

i havent read much from any of the characters and have seen large parts of fandom say that they would all get along/they’d be so close/besties, so the ideas i’ve read in your works (wolf king and persephone) are very interesting!!

to put it bluntly — i think they’d fucking hate him.

part of that is, weirdly, people tend to devalue tim’s relationships with steph and cass. like, steph and tim have never been normal about each other. cass and tim spent most of the nineties and early aughts jumping back and forth to each other’s comics. in what world would either of them be chill with the guy who hurt him (and damian) like that?

it also flattens cass’s ideology and steph’s history with bruce’s mission. cass has struggled with engaging with murderers because she’s sees them as herself, and their actions as her own actions. she is reflected in each of them, but she ultimately values life above all else which is why her personal connection to the bat is so interesting. she would not have sympathy or time for jason todd, someone who uses bruce’s mission to hurt others, to take lives, and attack the people she loves. like…. please be serious. she would not be hanging out w the person who was happy when bludhaven got nuked.

same deal with steph— something that really annoys me is when people act as though the “bad robin club” would be a bonding moment between steph and jason. not just because steph has a more developed comic run than jason has, with legitimate obstacles to her getting recognised as a hero, but also because again, this guy is doing the same shit as her dad. why would she like him after he went after tim multiple times? whenever someone draws this comparison i think of this page —

the fact that steph values bruce’s mission, his views on taking a life, despite being at such a profound low point is really important. i can’t believe she’d look at jason and think him admirable.

however!!!! that doesn’t mean their interactions (when reasonably in character imo) can’t be interesting!! having cass and jason interact in persephone was a lot of fun, because making him interact with someone other than bruce or dick puts him off balance. peoples fear of complex relationships with legitimate stakes makes me sad. neither cass or steph have that history with him before death, or that same image of him as a memorial, and it’s a fun thing to explore. specifically this passage from wolf-king —

like yeah!! neither of them would fuck with him!!! let him be the unpopular brother!!

[oldmannapping]

Ficlet: Bodyswap (Dick-Jason and Tim-Steph)

Based on my own prompt, which wouldn't leave my brain.

This is a body-swap fic with only the awkwardness. None of the bonding. Just the weird uncomfortable parts. Okay maybe a little of the bonding.

Excerpt:

Across the Cave, a furious voice echoed off stalagmites and startled several bats.

“Why are you so HORNY ALL THE TIME?!”

An indignant, and equally-bat-startling voice immediately responded.

“Why AREN’T you?!”

It seems there was an impasse.

It’s a tale as old as time. Batfamily meets warlock, warlock fumbles a spell, warlock disappears in a cloud of smoke, Batfamily realises they’re body-swapped…

You know. That old classic.

WARNINGS: Mentions of menstruation, mentions of sex drives and sexuality, swearing

Across the Cave, a furious voice echoed off stalagmites and startled several bats.

“Why are you so HORNY ALL THE TIME?!”

An indignant, and equally-bat-startling voice immediately responded.

“Why AREN’T you?!”

It seems there was an impasse.

It’s a tale as old as time. Batfamily meets warlock, warlock fumbles a spell, warlock disappears in a cloud of smoke, Batfamily realises they’re body-swapped…

You know. That old classic.

Dick and Jason were glaring at each other. Themselves. Each other, in each other’s bodies. You've got it, it's not your first rodeo right?

It’s been three days since the unfortunate warlock incident. As well as Jason and Dick, Tim and Stephanie have also been body-swapped in a move that seemed particularly designed by the spell/universe to cause maximum rage to Steph and mortification to Tim.

Jason and Dick have refused to allow the team to be locked down because Fuck Off, You Can’t Tell Me What To Do (Jason) and Bruce For The Good Of The Team We Need Some Space Because If We Murder Each Other It Will Be Bad For Morale (Dick).

Bruce might have held out for longer but Alfred’s visiting family in England and without his arched brow of British judgement, Bruce tends to let his children pick whichever course of action seems like it will cause the least about of hassle to Bruce’s personal routine.

He didn’t love them in the Cave 24/7 either. He’s had to ship Cass and Damian off to one of his nicer safehouses because having to manage four moody, hormonal, body-swapped vigilantes was hard enough without the mental load of school pickups and packed lunches. He misses Alfred. He’s hiding in his office at the moment, getting more Wayne Enterprises work done than he has in years.

Jason and Dick, and Tim and Stephanie, have spent three days in each other’s bodies, absolutely not patrolling or going anywhere that they’re likely to be recognised, but exercising and getting coffee and generally behaving like prisoners on day release. Zatanna has assured them that these sorts of spells usually fizzle out after less than a month, so it’s just a waiting game.

Apparently, they are bored. Apparently, they’re getting on each other’s nerves again.

Jason, in Dick’s body, has just raked his hands through his hair and pulled it nearly hard enough to rip it out.

“Why are you so HORNY ALL THE TIME!?” he has bellowed.

Dick’s reaction is to pull Jason’s body to its full height in indignation. “Why AREN’T you?” he shouts back.

Jason is at the end of his rope. “Everyone you see!” he says, pointing a finger at Dick. “I was just going for a fucking RUN. I just wanted some exercise, because this fucking body can’t go three minutes without goddam MOVING. And it just wouldn’t SHUT UP.”

He’s so mad. He continues: “This fucking body checks out EVERYONE. You’re constantly just sizing people up and thinking about boning them. ALL THE FUCKING TIME.”

Dick is also mad. “That’s not true!” he rebuts. “I notice people! We’re trained to be observant! Yeah, one of the things I notice about them is attraction. That’s NORMAL. That’s what people DO. At least I’m not thinking about the best ways I could incapacitate some poor 15-year-old barista.”

Jason flares Dick’s nostrils. “I do NOT think about hurting kids.”

Dick scoffs. “No, you think about hurting EVERYONE. Everyone you see is a threat. How could I take this person down? Am I stronger than this person? Is that lady hiding a gun in that baby stroller? All day long! You think that’s normal? You think that’s better than noticing if someone’s attractive?”

“It’s more fucking useful, especially in our line of work. You think you’ll ever save the day with a heroic boner?”

“Oh my god stop talking about it!”

“I wish I could stop THINKING about it! I had to SHOWER in this goddam body. Do you know how hard it is to ignore someone else’s boner in your shower? I nearly punched myself in the dick, pun fucking intended.”

Dick makes Jason’s teeth grind. “Do NOT break my penis.”

Jason points at Dick again like he’s a giant disobedient dog. “I will get your FUCKING nipples pierced if this body has one more hard on. I’m not fucking around.”

Dick flails Jason’s huge arms. His fluid, lithe movements look very out of place on a muscle-bound heavyweight. Almost campy. “I have literally ZERO control over that right now. You realise that right? You realise you sound ridiculous.”

“You’re the one who conditioned your body to be like this. Make it stop!”

“I don’t know if you forgot about this part of puberty or if you were just too busy being angry and emo and FARTING to notice, but boners are a fact of life, suck it up.”

“Firstly, some of us actually eat vegetables - YOU need more fibre in your diet, Grayson, don’t get me started on that – and secondly, sorry I didn’t condition myself to repress freakish amounts of lust. I must have been too busy DYING and being RESURRECTED and BRAINWASHED BY THE LEAGUE OF ASSASSINS.”

“Oh my god WE GET IT, YOU DIED. You cannot use that to win every argument. Stop being so angry in my body, I can feel how gross and grouchy yours is all the time and I don’t want you infecting mine.”

“That’s funny, since I’m probably keeping your body the cleanest it’s been since you were fifteen, you horny maniac.”

“There’s a difference between feeling attraction and acting on it! It’s NORMAL to notice people in a sexual way! Don’t shame me!”

“Stop saying ‘attraction’, this is not attraction, this is Ivy-level mind-fogging crotch-throbbing run-ruining-“

“Just because all YOU think about is violence and murder, don’t get mad at me for having a sex drive!”

“I’m not mad at you for having a sex drive! I’m mad at you for making ME have your sex drive!”

“I didn’t cast this spell!”

“I know!”

“There’s nothing wrong with being sexual and expressing it with whoever I want, as long as they’re consenting!”

“I know! I support you! I couldn’t give a fuck who you bone and I don’t want to think about it, but I support it!”

“Good!”

“Good!”

Steph and Tim are standing a few feet away, watching hypnotically. Steph uses Tim’s bony elbow to nudge him in her ribs. She whispers something to him and he snorts a laugh, then freezes.

“Um,” he says in Steph’s voice, expression tight. “I think you might need to teach me how to use a tampon. Or, uh. Sanitary pad. Whichever you’re most comfortable with. Or. Um. Maybe your body just peed? Many women develop incontinence after childbirth, so it’s fine, I just. Uh. I just want to know what I’m dealing with here.”

Steph gapes at him. “Jesus fucking Christ.” She grabs her phone and swears when the fingerprint ID doesn’t work. Jabbing in her PIN, she swipes to her period tracker app. “Fuck. Un-fucking-believable.”

Ten minutes later, Steph and Tim emerge from the Cave’s bathrooms with grim expressions, not meeting each other’s eyes.

Tim, valiantly trying to remain scientific, offers, “I didn’t know it smelled different than normal blood.”

Steph digs Tim’s nails into his palms. “Stop talking.”

Tim cannot stop talking. “I just mean. I’ve been around a lot of blood, but never, you know. That kind of blood. And I never thought about how, in its basic composition, it’s not just blood, it’s also endometrial cells and cervical lining so of course it would be different.”

“Stop. Talking.”

Tim is a nervous talker. “And also, good idea on using the gloves and applicator. That way I didn’t have to touch any, um, you know, touch your, touch you when I was doing the. Yeah. Not that it would be gross or bad to touch you, I mean. You’re very. Great. And women are. So brave. Every month. But it’s just. You know. It’s not. I mean you consented, but in this situation, is it really consent, since this whole thing is kind of coercive, since you don’t REALLY have control over your-“

“SHUT UP!”

Dick and Jason raise their heads like meerkats from where they’ve ended up facing off with their phones, stubbornly shout-reading each other google search results for “normal male sex drive” and “how do I know if I’m asexual”.

“Everything okay over there?” asks Dick, Jason’s deeper voice carrying easily across the Cave.

“Fine!” say Steph and Tim in tandem.

“Totally natural and normal!” adds Tim helpfully. “We’re totally comfortable. We’re blossoming. We’re very healthy.”

Steph groans. “I cannot believe I used to date you.”

Part Two

[cloakedsparrow]

Another one of those 'Tim joins the Batfamily early' Au's that's also a 'Cass joins the batfamily early' Au, wherein Bruce doesn't suddenly start respecting his children's privacy and boundaries when Jason meets his bio mom and actually hovers right outside the door, thus knowing the moment things turn south. He gets his boy out of there right away (the Joker still has diplomatic immunity for whatever reason and Sheila still dies). Jason is sad about how it all went down, but Bruce explains to him what he'd explained to Alfred before Jason learned about his mom. Between that and how Bruce behaved when he found Jason overseas, he knows his adopted dad loves him, so he's okay.

He does, however, think that they should probably look into the whole thing where Lady Shiva might have slept with his bio dad and then had a daughter around the time Jason was born. Just in case. So they track down feral fifteen year old Cassandra and are kinda thinking they should keep her no matter what when the DNA shows that she actually was Willis Todd's kid all along.

Bruce is definitely keeping Jason's half-sister, so she stays.

Dick comes back from space to learn about all of this and starts spending more time with his little brother and sister, which gets the Titans involved. Raven helps them translate some basic motions beside Cass' greeting punch to speed along communication with her.

While Jason and Cass are bonding and learning to communicate, she keeps bringing this kid to his attention or deliberately putting them in the boy's path. He's a few years younger than them and Jason's pretty sure he's seen him around, but he's never really paid any attention to Tim Drake before. Now that Cass has imprinted on him or whatever, he decides to try to get to know him.

What he eventually realizes is that Cass has been trying to tell him that Tim knows who they are. He's good at keeping a secret, but little clues in his body language when he sees them had clued her in. She can also tell he's studying martial arts and gymnastics, so she sees an easy in and just starts training the kid. That's when Jason figures it out.

Jason and Cass get Dick on board, and the three convince Bruce they need to keep Tim.

Alfred says nothing throughout all this but a room has been set up with a batman and robin bedspread, a bunch of Sherlock Holmes, Agatha Christie, and Artemis Fowl books, and the closet has been converted into a mini darkroom, so it's safe to say he saw the writings on the wall.

[flamingpudding]

DPxDC Family Week June 19 (Day 2)

Prompt: Siblings | Play

A/N: All I gotta say is this was heavily inspired by Wayne Family Adventures. I think I focused more no the Play prompt than Siblings, either way please enjoy my Day 2 contribution :D

AO3 Link: DPxDC Family Week Contributions

Danny was in a tricky situation. He carefully checked his surroundings as he crouched behind a bookshelves to reload. The Meta Alliance was off the table. Duke got taken out by Dick. He had seen Damian hunting down Tim earlier, muttering something about using the same trick again despite his warning. Jason was still wandering the halls in search of him loudly offering Danny a new Alliance promising that he wouldn't be shot on sight. He had lost sight of Cass earlier but he knew Steph was hiding on the second floor waiting for Jason to take revenge.

When Dick had come to him and Jazz earlier that day Danny did not expect for the oldest Wayne to hand them each a paintball gun with a wide grin. Only for them to suggest taking part in a game they played every year called Assassin. It was apparently a secret from Bruce that only the children of Bruce Wayne aka Batman took part in.

He had been suspicious of it at first, Jazz and him had only joined the Family for a couple of months now and Dick had suggested they join the game as a bonding experience between siblings with the rest of the family. When Danny didn't let up on his suspicious staring he also offered that it was a way to train and test Danny's stealth against his new siblings.

Only partly convinced, at least in Danny's case, they had joined. The moment they entered the sitting room everyone else was in, Harper, last year's winner according to the others, decided to start with a special alliance to ease Jazz into the game. Only for her to get accidentally taken out. She had made the mistake of forming the alliance with all the girls including Jazz, without prior information that till then only Danny had been privileged to with how often his own sister had souped him. To Harper's credit, she didn't know about the bad aim his sister inherited from their dad. The girl alliance got pretty quickly dissolved then and the Fanton siblings formed a new one, since Danny knew best how bad of a shot Jazz was.

Though Danny additionally had the one with Duke until he got taken out. They honestly had thought that with their Meta-powers they could overwhelm the others. Hell they were a power duo on patrols, this should have been easy. That was until Dick got Duke and Duke in all the dramatic sibling fashion 'died' in a distracting way that made Dick and Danny laugh only for the Ghost to then escape.

"AH FUCK!" Looks like Jason got taken out now too from the sounds of it. Danny didn't stay to find out who took the revenant out. He went invisible and phased through the wall behind him and floated up a floor through it. Carefully to avoid Bruce as well as Alfred so that the two adults shouldn't grow suspicious. Suddenly there was rusting behind him and Danny turned around quickly. He was still invisible so aside from Duke no one should be able to see him right now.

"I know you're here Danny. Show yourself."

"You're wearing your mask with heat-vision?" The question came out before he could help himself as he stared at Tim. Both his hands raised as he held them up, showing that he meant no harm, his paintball gun in his right hand pointing at the ceiling for extra measures while Tim was grinning at him with his gun pointed at Danny.

"Your body temperature is lower than the average human one, especially when you use your powers. It's the easiest way to find you since it was decided that both you and Duke were allowed to use them."

"I see." Danny nodded along. "I take it, you want to take me out right now?"

"If you don't agree to my proposal. Help me take out Damian and Cass."

Danny hummed thinking about it for a second before he noticed movement from the corner of the hall. He grinned, shrugging with his shoulders. "I would but… sorry maybe next time!"

He let himself fall through the floor as Tim cried out, blue splotches on his back appearing. Danny barely missed getting shot too as he fell onto the first floor. An orange splatter left on the wall at the height his chest had been mere seconds ago. Cass standing at the end of the hall as they made one final eye contact before he completely disappeared from sight through the floor.

But he did not get a second of rest as he fell into one of the down stairs sitting rooms. The moment he was through the ceiling and made eye contact with a stunned but then grinning assailant. He flipped to the side barely dodging the colorful rounds shot at him and aimed his own gun. Ten shots, nine missing but the last one finally got his target's leg.

"Gotcha!" He cheered as he floated down grinning brightly at Dick.

"Not bad baby ghost. I didn't expect you and Jazz to be this good. Sure you guys didn't have formal training?" Inspecting his leg the elder smiled, happy at seeing Danny enjoying himself this freely. He still remembered the first month in which Danny barely spoke to anyone aside from his sister. Dick had been a bit worried when he asked the Fanton kids to join their game but he was glad that he did now. The Fantons had come a long way and it appeared that they finally saw the rest of the Waynes as siblings too.

"No, everything is self thought. Though, Jazz hitting Harper was totally an accident considering she had been aiming at-" Their phones buzzed and both each took their own out. Dick whistled. "Baby bird took out Steph. So now it's only you, Jazz, Dami and Cass left. Looks like this year's game will even be over before patrol starts."

"Did it take longer last year?"

Dick nodded. "It went right into patrol time. But maybe it's getting over faster this year because everyone is at the Manor." He didn't mention that he had specifically asked the others to not draw out the game too long. Despite the couple of months, Danny and Jazz were still new to Gotham and the family and they both didn't need distractions during patrol and support.

"Speaking of being at the Manor. Why hasn't Alfred said anything about the paint splatters yet? He is omnipresent, I thought he would be the first to notice." The halfa tilted his head in light confusion. Really with the way Alfred always knew what was going on in the Manor Danny had long since expected for the butler to gather them all to give them a stern talking about playing with paintball guns inside the building.

"It's fine as long as we clean up after ourselves." He raised an eyebrow and Dick rubbed his neck nervously. "And as long as we don't go overboard and damage anything permanently. Besides, sometimes Alfred even ends up joining in on these games to teach us a lesson or to get back at us for all the grief we gave him with injuries in the past."

Danny raised a suspicious eyebrow. "He… won't just do that this time, will he?"

"Nope, but we should clean up here before Bruce comes back. It also helps that most of us only shoot when we are sure that we will hit the others and not something else." Danny nodded, muttering an embarrassed 'sorry' remembering how he let more than one shot lose at his targets. Dick only chuckled, patting his head and offering a cloth piece to wipe the paint from the wall.

Once it was clean Danny gave a grinning Dick a little finger salute before going invisible again and leaving the room. There were only four players left. He wouldn't be able to find Cass but he could try and take out Daimien. Choosing to be as silent as possible Danny used his ghost powers to also float. He turned off his ghostly powers as he came across Bruce and Tim by the stairs. The man was asking Tim about the paint on his neck that he must have splattered there when Cass had taken him out earlier.

"Damian and I got into a disagreement when I passed his atelier earlier. He threw one of his paint brushes at me like a dart."

"Damian wouldn't just do that because of a simple disagreement. What sort of argument did you two get into this time, for it to art out like this?"

Danny frowned slightly. The others never had mentioned what would happen if Bruce found out. He hid his gun on his back under his hoodie.

"Hi Bruce, I think someone must have pissed him off at school. He threw one at me too, when I asked him what got him into a sour mood." Danny decided to add to the lie. Really the youngest stabbiness was a really nice trait that made these lies even more believable. Tim gave him a thumbs up for the support hidden from Bruce's eyes.

"Hello Danny. Maybe I should have a talk with Damian. I cannot have him bring another knife to school again." The man muttered with a sigh as he walked away from them. Tim and Danny grinned at each other before once again Danny saluted before making his way back to the second floor. He had a feeling that he would find Damian or Cass up there.

Hearing voices by the end of the hall where Damian's Atelier was, Danny decided to try and be sneaky. The door was only a gap wide open, he peaked into the room. It hadn't been long since he had meet Bruce with Tim by the stairs but apparently the man was quick with his actions. In the room were said man and the youngest Wayne, Bruce was apparently trying to get Damian to tell him why he was in a sour mood and hurl his paint brushes at his siblings.

Danny snickered, the man's back was to the door and he grinned the moment Damian noticed him peaking in by the door. He gave the youngest a little bit of a mocking wave with the addition of a wide grin as Damian scowled. Bruce apparently took it that Damian did not like the reinforced rule of no knives at school.

Still grinning the ghost boy pulled his gun from the back and aimed it through the door carefully so that Bruce wouldn't notice him. Damian was now flat out glaring deadly at him, daring him to do it in the presence of his father. Waiting for the right time Danny watched Bruce and when the man appeared to look at something at his side he fired a shot. Hitting the youngest square in the chest who quickly despite his deadly glare turned towards one of his unfinished pieces and grabbed some of his art supplies to explain that color splatter as a lapse of his own judgment and frustration of the topic they were discussing.

Danny definitely knew he would be paying for this action later. Damian wasn't as stabby with him like he was with others thanks to Danny's ghostly powers, but that only meant that the youngest was creative in other ways to get back at the halfa. Though right now it only mattered to Danny that he was able to get two of the bat-kids out of the game with no formal training. That grin was whiped of his face when he felt a short sting on his back and his head whipped around to see Cass behind him smiling brightly.

"Lacking situational awareness."

"Okay yea, that was my bad." Letting out a sight he admitted defeat as he in a bout of dramatic essence chose to lay flat on the ground only lifting his head a little to face an amused Cass. Taking out his phone he proceeded to text the group that he had taken out Damian but in return got taken out by Cass. Looks like Cass would be the winner this year, he commented into the chat.

"Finally found you Danny!" Looking up stunned as well as hearing shuffling towards the door from the Atelier Danny looked up to see Jazz standing by the end of the hall now her paintball gun aimed at Danny as Cass dived to the side away from him. Right, his sister was still in the game!

"Let me handle this!"

"Wait Jazz!"

Too late his sister fired multiple shots and in a feat the half ghost honestly thought impossible, the projectiles ricochet off of decorations, leaving small splatters of paint behind them everywhere. The door next to him opened and Danny stared wide eyes up at Bruce and Damian.

"What is going on-"

-splat-

At the end of the day Cass was declared the winner while Jazz was declared the honorary winner by being the first one to ever hit Bruce Wayne aka Batman square in the face with a paintball gun.

Though the siblings all got a stern talking to from the man for playing Assassin inside the Manor as well as Alfreds disappointed look™ that was followed by an amused smile whenever the butler side eyed Bruce. The smiles and looks all the siblings exchanged promised that next year's game would be filled with revenge plans. Maybe till then Jazz's aim would become better with the shooting classes Bruce decided to sign her up for with a knowing smile.