#incorrect batboys quotes

[ryemiffie]

More quotes from my day as batfam incorrect quotes:

Robin(Damian): I'm actually one of Batman's favourites.

Superboy(Jon): Batman has favourites?!

-

Literally Batman at some point: No Tim you can not have more batgadgets. Oh? Jason is trying to end the world? Well at least he's found something that makes him happy.

[91-1lover]

What if Damian and Tim love each other and even like? It's just more of a situation "Manipulating others is easier ". Maybe an example will help;

Damian: Father, May I go to Zoo today?

Bruce:No Damian, you're grounded.

Tim:Oh, that's bad. I could go with you to take photos of otter, but if you are not going I think I will stay too. What's a zoo without company. Maybe I will go with Kon next week.

Bruce *Super happy in a moment of thinking his youngest kids getting along*: If you two agree not to kill each other, Damian can go

Tim and Damian:*Knowing looks*

Or situation like;

Tim who has abandoned issues and is having fear of people leaving him: Dick is mad at me. Can you stab me so he will be in his mother hen mode Instead?

Damian who would like to have 5 minutes of peace from Grayson: Say no more

[goodoldfashionedengineer]

Dick: *posts a video consisting of multiple clips to social media, in which Jason is seen sitting in a chair, reading something on his phone*

---

Jason: *widens his eyes and leans forward, gripping one of the chair arms*

Jason: No, the fuck, he didn't?!

Jason: That's not something he would say, but fine.

Jason: *blinks a few times* *looks up* *stares at his phone again* *blinks again* *raises his eyebrows*

Jason: *lies his phone aside, grips his hair while he paces around the room, clearly suppressing a scream*

Jason: I know I sometimes turn into a masochist when it comes to reading, but this is on a new level, even for me

---

Tim: *walks into the frame and takes Jason's phone away*

Jason: Give me back my pho-

Tim: YOU READ BATFAMILY ON AO3?!

[sodamnbored]

Damian, entering the living room: Oh, Drake. I didn’t realise you were here too.

Tim, distracted on his phone on the couch: Yeah, best WiFi around. Keeping busy?

Damian, looking in cupboards and chandeliers for acrobatic older brothers: Looking for Dick.

Tim absently, not looking up from Grindr: Mm, me too.

[youroriginalsublimecupcakestuff]

Dick, at the police station: hi, i'm here for jason.

officer: last name?

Dick : .....ah. you must be new.

[dc-and-damirae]

dick: Hey guys, what are you watching? damian: Kitten Football. dick: Why? damian: It’s randomly came on and now I’m invested. And then jason came in and got into it too. Aw, look Snuggles fell asleep- jason: SNUGGLES, WAKE THE HELL UP AND GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME, DAMNIT! dick:?! damian: jason sees the show differently than I do.

[samthechaotic]

Tim: Whenever I face a horrible situation, I ask myself "what would Jason do?" and do the exact opposite.

Damian: For the first, and probably last, time in your life Drake, you're right.

[yourmomxx]

Bruce, in a meeting: My policy is if you see something, say something.

Robin!Dick: I saw a squirrel in a tree today!

Bruce, with the tone of someone who is used to Dick: Outstanding.

Bruce: This is what I'm talking about people.

[loosepocketchange01]

[midnight-pluto]

Y/N, talking about red lobster: im a whore for the cheesy biscuits

Jason: you say you’re a whore for everything

Y/N: oh yeah like what?

Jason: bottled water, massages, internet, burt’s bees, french fries, american spirits, blink 182…

Y/N: we need to hang out less

[ryemiffie]

More things from my day as batfam incorrect quotes:

Dick: You wanna know what I've never been able to wrap my head around?

Tim: Long poles?

Dick: The fact that- ..what?

Tim: I just feel like a head would be too thick and clonky to really get all the way up and around it if it's like a super tall pole, heads ain't flexible like that.

Dick: How does your head go to places like this?

Tim: I just explained that is not possible.

Dick: No, I meant like your train of thought.

Tim: Oh my thought process isn't a train, it's actually the 1998 batmobile.

Dick: Of course it is.

Tim: What's your vehicle of thought?

Dick: Why would I have an answer to that?

Tim: Come on, you've thought about it, I know you have.

Dick: ...

Dick: The original turtle van from the 1987 tmnt cartoon.

Tim: I knew it.

[91-1lover]

Dick and Damian- *Fighting using an incredible strategy and hours of training*

Meanwhile

Jason- YEEEET *Throwing Tim at bad guys*

[lilylovelyxo]

*Y/N, Dick, and Roy watching Jason beat the shit out of a man for putting his hands on you*

Dick: “Oh, boy…”

Y/N: “I'm going to watch through my fingers. No, I'm not.”

Dick: “I'm going to look away.”

Roy: “I think we're gonna have to lay low for a little while after this.”

[nadineprescott]

Alfred: do you boys wish to come to church?

Duke: i’ve got patrol

Tim: i’m an atheist

Jason: I’m a satanist

Damian: …

Alfred: very well

*this happens every sunday

**they go with him sometimes to make him happy, also because church ladies have the best drama

***jason pretends that he is burning to death every. single. time.

[multifandom-disaster]

In Tim robin days Tim Drake: *calls Dick Grayson* Hey, are you busy right now? Dick Grayson: A little bit. Why? Tim Drake: Oh, no worries. Nothing important. *5 hours later* Dick Grayson: You were in jail?! Why didn't you say anything?! Tim Drake: You were busy! Jason ver.

[dc-and-damirae]

rando at a gala: If you don't mind me asking, what ever happened to your brother? dick: He died rando: Oh... I'm so sorry dick: Don't worry, he’s okay now rando: …Can you please clarify? dick: No