#incorrect quote ideas

[ideasforincorrectquotes]

A and B are on a mission and are being chased. After finding a temporary hiding spot, A still hyper from the adrenaline rush, kisses and hugs B, blurting out I love you multiple times.

After a moment A realizes what they just did and backs off a couple steps.

A: I am sorry I didn't mean to...if I could take it all back, I would. I swear to God.

B (still in shock): You mean to say you never felt anything for me?

A: No...I mean yes, I di-

B: Watch out!

B covers A as bullets start raining at them. A quickly drops a smoke bomb and they flee the scene. Taking shelter in an abandon building, A starts securing the place.

B (in raspy voice and pained look): A, ab..bout earlier...

A: B I know what did was wrong...B?

(B falls forward in A's arms, fainting, confusing A. A touches the shoulder of B to realize they have two gunshot wounds)

A: B what's wrong...??? Oh my God, B!!

B (before falling completely unconscious): A? I...don't...re-regret i-it...

[notrobinsomethingworse]

Damian: I quit Robin.

Tim: You can do that???

Jason: First I’m hearing about it.

Dick: Aww Dami what superhero name have you picked now?

Damian: I will become a doctor.

Dick: …

Dick: YOU CAN DO THAT??

Jason: You’ve done it brat. You’ve escaped.

Tim, still muttering: You can quit Robin? How long has it been?

[lemonfizzyy]

I'd like to think Dick was vocal about hating Talia until Damian arrived and then all the recreational badmouthing of her ceased immediately.

Tim: "Hey, Dick, what happened to hating Talia? You haven't gone on a rant about her in a while."

Damian, looking at Dick: "What. What does that mean? You hate my mother?"

Dick: "What? No, of course not. Tim is mistaken. Aren't you, Tim?"

Tim: "No, I'm not. I-"

Dick, gritting teeth: "Aren't you, Tim?"

Tim: "......Yeah....?"

Dick: "See? He's got it mixed up. Talia is just the coolest. Now let's talk about something else."

[sunburstsandmoonshadows]

el chupacabra believes in you too!

based on this tumblr chain:

[thefriendlyneighborhoodqueer]

sometimes i think about how funny it would be if bruce had a slight english accent as a result of alfred being the only adult in his life for most of his formative years. that or he just says british slang instead of english.

this either drives his children insane, or they think it’s the most hilarious thing ever.

__________________________

Bruce: Can you pass the chips?

Dick: Sure, B. *passes over the potato chips*

Bruce: No, the chips.

Dick: ???? �� yeah? here?

Bruce: NO! THE CHIPS! *gesturing wildly for the french fries*

Damian: Father, are you having a stroke?

———

Batman: Alright, this mission is very important. It is imperative that everything goes to schedule. (shh-edule)

*red robin and red hood snicker*

Batman: *glare* As I was saying, it all must go to shh-edule…

RR & RH : *uproariously laughter *

Batman: *harsher glare* Is something funny?

RR: Oh nothing, B, don’t worry.

RH: Absolutely nothing wrong, “left-tenant”

RR & RH: *dying of laughter *

———

Bruce: *reaching the end of a long rant about responsibility and making sure you are keeping yourself and others safe* And what do you have to say for yourself??

Duke: … You sound like Alfred…

Bruce: *horrified look over coming him* … what

Cass: *furious nodding*

*Some time later, after B has been fished out of Gotham Harbor, which he jumped into after declaring that he “couldn’t turn into his father”*

Alfred: *reaching the end of a long rant about responsibility and making sure you are keeping yourself and others safe* And what do you have to say for yourself??

Bruce: *white as a sheet* … Sorry Alfie…

*Steph is heard furiously cackling in the background*

_______________________

anyways i just thought this was fun

[starzovermarz]

stupid

[artsymeeshee]

[deikshen]

Shen Qingqiu: *floridly insulting Shang Qinghua, describing the tortures he will do to him and how he will probably mutilate him genitally*

Shang Qinghua: *responds to insults and threats by cringing, crying more, accepting the fan blows, laughing nervously, crying more and being more pathetic*

Mobei Jun: Junshang, with all due respect, your husband is flirting with my husband.

Luo Binghe: Without any respect, your husband is flirting with mine and very shamelessly.

[ideasforincorrectquotes]

A: Flirting with you is like punching water.

B: Why? Cause it’s pointless, or because you look stupid doing it?

A: Did you hear it?

B: I heard it that time, yeah.

[sodamnbored]

New parent Bruce at two in the morning: Why aren’t you in bed?

9-year-old Dick, sitting at the table eating ice cream: Because I’m in the kitchen.

Bruce tiredly, digging out some coffee: And why are you in the kitchen?

Dick: Because it’s where the ice cream is.

[notrobinsomethingworse]

Tim, minecraft speed running.

Jason: What you up to?

Tim, doesn’t answer.

Jason, looking at the villagers: They kinda sound like Bruce.

[Eye contact]

Narrator: And that’s how Tim coded the now famous “Batman villager mod” under an anonymous account.

[cozyras]

friend one: "y'know, sometimes i think that you should get an achievement for being stupid. but then i realized that you would get one everyday."

friend two: "fuck you!"

[trickarrows-bishop]

[r3ynah]

"Despite being ‘at a loss for words’, Danny scolded me for the next 45 minutes."

DCxDP prompt

Dani was completely flawless in everything she did, or so she proudly stated to everyone, which was true to some extent. She handles most of the missions handed to her by the Justice League dark with flying colors, she was sometimes called in to replace Constantine when the man was unavailable, finding lost scrolls, and performing magic she could do with ease, but she was not perfect she knows that well.

So, when she accidentally angered one of the most powerful demons to ever exist dangering not only herself but also the whole embassy of the Justice League, up to the main heroes and then down to Young Justice, Dani knew she kinda fucked up and made an error in her calculations on how much she could taunt the said demon, and now everyone was panicking which was...

Not an ideal condition for her because when everyone panics, she also starts panicking, not because the demon she angered was now spewing threats here and there (which was one of the corniest villain monologues she had ever heard).

No, she was afraid considering that since she had disturbed the peace between the living and the supernatural which was technically the dead if you based it on the horror movie franchise —BUT that was not the point, the point is that she cannot control the current situation, and that means she needed to get help from her....Brother....Eugh.

'Let's just get over this.' she sighed as she grabbed a dagger from her chest cavity, Dani's movements caught the eye of everyone present in the room, the ones that weren't occupied by the demon were watching her carefully to make sure the little ghost doesn't make anything worse than it is.

One, Dani closed her eyes.

Two, she took a deep breath.

Three—then she sliced her palm with the dagger, green ectoplasm oozing out of the wound.

Four. Everyone panicked.

Five. Finally, A portal surfaced.

It took only five seconds for Danny to head her call, exactly 20 minutes to calm the dispute happening, and 7 seconds for Phantom to regain his composure to look at his younger sister in the eye.

Dani avoided eye contact with her brother, not just her brother, while also avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room at the same time, whistling innocently as if nothing had ensued, Dani tried her luck and glanced at the levitating figure a few paces before her.

Phantom looked so done and constipated at the same time, Dani wanted to take a picture and show it to Dan afterwards.

"I'm at a loss for words."

"Despite being ‘at a loss for words’, Danny scolded me for the next 45 minutes."

[corvus-for-ddd]

[headcanonthings]

Cody: I’ve been dropping him the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response. Obi-Wan: Wow. He sounds stupid. Cody: But he's not. He's really smart actually. Just dense. Obi-Wan: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!” Cody: I guess you’re right. Hey Obi-Wan, I love you. Obi-Wan: See! Just say that! Cody: Holy fucking shit. Obi-Wan: If that flies over his head then, sorry Cody, but he's too dumb for you. Cody: Sir.