#your honor quote

[incorrectbatfamandfriends]

Bruce: How can you afford this on a reporters salary?

Clark: Oh Lex owes me child support.

Bruce: What?

Clark: Yeah, any damage Kon causes as superboy I mark as “after school activities.”

[ahfrickenfrick]

*nightwing and red hood in the batmobile doing a high speed chase*

red hood: i hate when you drive- PUNCH BUGGY *slams his fist into nightwings shoulder*

nightwing: *swerving into oncoming traffic from the power of the punch*: HEY I THOUGHT WE BANNED THAT GAME

red hood: correction! b banned that game, and the old fuck isn’t here right now- and the perp got away, yeah good driving there, ‘wing

[yourgalgremlin]

Creep hitting on Regulus @ the bar:

GUY: What’s your body count, beautiful?

REG: That depends.

GUY: On what?

REG: Wether you’re asking how many guys I’ve “taken home” or how many I’ve taken out ☠️

REG (whispers): Both are higher than you’d think.

JAMES: …I want him in a way that’s concerning to my life expectancy.

[garpen]

Tim: There's fries in the fridge if you want

Jason, *opening fridge*: these cold stale ass fries?

Tim: They're in the fridge. Did you expect them to be freshly hot outta my ass?

Jason: Well damn, mb. I'll put them in the air fryer

Tim, muttering under his breath: look who developed common fucking sense

[liesmultixxx]

annabeth: *pouring her heart out*

percy: *nodding*

(internally: the earrings!!! oh my gods the love of my life looks so wonderful😍😍)

not him focussing on little details because he’s just that whipped

[moonyswarmsweaters]

Remus: So you lived in a closet?

Harry: Well, technically it's a cupbo-

Remus: I have some experience with that

[propussyslayer]

harry: tell me about my parents, professor. did you and my father get along?

remus:

remus, who shared his first kiss with james while high: well we weren't that close but

[mackerel22]

Dazai: Chuuya and I don't use pet names.

Odasaku: I see. Hey, what do bees make?

Dazai: Honey.

*silence*

Dazai: Ha, you thought, bitch.

Chuuya, yelling from another room: What do you want, whore?

[mairaiscarrierofthepaperclips]

Buck: Welcome to the 'Fuck Evan Buckley' club, where we discuss all the reasons you think I've been a bad friend. We talk, work through them, and move on.

Eddie:... I may have misunderstood the purpose of this club.

Tommy: Me, too.

Taylor: I could go either way.

[theaceofarrows]

Jason: I hate double standards. Burn a body at the crematorium, and you're "being respectful." But do it at a warehouse, and you're "destroying evidence."

Damian: I concur. It's quite bothersome

Dick: Stop

[gothamhappiness]

Jason: *Running towards Tim with open arms, but also with his Red Hood helmet on*

Tim: *Quickly moves out of the way, ready to fight*

Jason: Hey, why did you move, idiot?

Tim: I thought you were going to attack me.

Jason: I was going to hug you!

Tim: WHY WOULD YOU HUG ME!?

Jason: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?

Tim:

Jason: Okay you're right. I was going to attack you. 🙄

[cathrrrine]

y/n, mentally: i wonder what would happen if i asked charles-

[distant shriek] [sounds of falling] [door banging] [startled cat yowl] [falling again] [creaking stairs] [heavy footsteps]

[y/n’s door swings open]

charles: *red-faced and panting* yes.

y/n: what

charles, hands on his knees: yes *wheeze* i’d say *wheeze* yes! *laughing*

y/n: you’d…sub in for my 8am class tomorrow?

charles: ye-! wait, no- you…wh? i- *dying breath* [slowly lowering himself down to lie on the floor] you- yeah *wheeze* sure

[theunholyvirginemilyprentiss]

EMILY: Spencer, why are you laying on the floor?

REID: Depression.

EMILY: Well shit, scoot over then.

[deadtiredghost]

they're siblings ur honor

[garpen]

Duke: You are so lucky you're my favorite little brother

Damian: Thank you?

Damian: Wait, I'm your ONLY younger brother

Duke: Take what you can get man, your my favorite little brother-even if it's on a technicality.

Damian: Tt that's just like saying Cassandra is our favorite sister when she's out ONLY sister.

Duke: Exactly, now you get it!

[liesmultixxx]

percy really said gotta take care of my wife first sorry 💅🏻